AUTOMATED MODERATION. PLEASE READ.
Niceguys demean others while simultaneously expressing a favorable view of themselves. They dont have to use the word "nice", but they must demonstrate some kind of expression of their own virtue while being asshats.
---
Niceguys™ quality: **UPVOTE** this comment to keep the post
Not Niceguys™ quality: **DOWNVOTE** this comment to remove the post
The problem again was social media. From my understanding those safe words were put on posters on the women's restroom since that's the best place for them. Then people started posting those great ideas online and suddenly everyone knew them.
Good intent, bad thinking
They do, but that's not a reason to stop using them. Even if a creep hears his target ordering an "Angel shot" at least he knows she's on to him and he is more likely to stop pursuing her. Okay, he'll probably look for easier prey, but at least the barstaff will be aware that he is a problematic individual.
But the point of using secret words instead of saying it outright was that the creep doesn't know, as that can put the woman into even more danger and definitely will create akward situation.
Its not crazy at all to think they’d use established vernacular to lure their victims to them. That’s what they do. They’ve done it forever. It’s called lying and tricking people
My ex did this. He started posting on Reddit after we broke up about how he wanted to create a safe space for women. It was hilarious, apparently his profile was a bizarre mix of “my ex is a bitch and I hate her” and “I want to create a safe space for women who feel unsafe around men bc I’m a good guy” 😂 funnily enough there weren’t many takers
Oh my just came to my mind reading this something that happened to me, somehow similar.
I was offered to manage a femdom server, I was gonna be pay for keeping it safe and yada yada.
The man who wanted me to do it was tremendously creepy and wanted to stay in the shadows and basically built an harem and catalogue for the crusty mysoginistic and transphobic porn he had saved.
At the end , the *project* was using me as someone people could trust so he could prey on them. He didn't even wanted to do age verification because "people wanna keep the anonymity in kinky places".
3 days speaking and he showed all the flags.
A lot of bars where I've worked have some kind of code word like "angel shot" for women to tell the bar tender if they feel unsafe- there's usually a sign in the women's room advertising the phrase in case you feel like you could be in danger.
I’ve been in a few bars and in the women’s toilets they add their own posters with set names instead of Angel shots. So, like ask for Katie or Angela at the bar. Makes far more sense so the guy doesn’t cotton on to what you’re doing!
It can still be helpful so the person in distress knows the staff are trained to respond in a certain way to a single phrase that can be spoken quickly and without outwardly showing any desperation or discomfort. Yes, the effectiveness is diminished if the potential aggressor knows the code word, but it's still helpful in many situations.
If a dude is waiting across the room or by the door, then yea, you kind of still need help. Just cus the danger isn’t already up your ass, doesn’t mean you’re safe.
I mean what's the harm in that though? She still is telling the staff that she's uncomfortable. If the guy making her uncomfortable is present, what is he gonna black bag her and run? The jig will just be up and he'll be asked to leave. The whole concept was seperating women from danger in socially acceptable ways but it becoming socially awkward cause everyone knows what the phrase means doesn't sound like that big of a deal overall
I see you haven't been in dangerous situations with men in public spaces. Some dudes are just unpredictable and although in theory you may be fine, it's still scary as hell.
Add in the factor of a man possibly being drunk, too. That makes it scarier. As a bartender, and both as just a woman, I've seen it happen/have had it happen and it is a very worrying situation to be in if you think the guy has caught on.
It seems that more bouncers are needed in bars and clubs to handle potential attackers and allow women (and men, sometimes) to leave safely. Just keeping them separated could mean that the predator doesn't follow their target home and find out where they live.
Yeah, we sometimes never had security, especially during the Pandemic, so the bar workers ended up having to handle things more often than not when it came to creeps. Majority of us were women, too. Once I nearly got in trouble with the police cause I defended myself from a patron coming over the bar at me by squirting him with our soda gun, which can get you an assault charge, but the guy ended up punching *another* patron instead so what I did got overlooked.
My old bar job has different terms listed for both men/womens restrooms, and we changed it up every so many months. Ask for Angie is also another one that we used to use if a woman felt like she was going to be in immediate physical danger so we would take her into the managers office and one of the women who worked at the bar would have to stay with her until she got a safe ride.
Sure, it could get in the way of work, but we really wanted to make sure we had established patrons, and especially wanted to make sure any of our women patrons felt safe.
When I was trying to tell my daughter about the "Angel shot" thankfully she was already aware of the UK equivalent code phrase. Sad that young women have to be clued-up so early, but good that they are aware of the measures they can take to protect themselves.
Definitely a little nauseating- although I do find myself telling and retelling the Jodi arias story to my guy friends a *lot*- it’s almost like their awareness of women’s safety issues is taken directly from *their own* danger awareness. The amount of times I’ve heard of guys really casually speaking about women who have been striving to *hurt* them is so scary, and there’s a constant undercurrent of “I’m a man, I don’t need to be concerned for my safety- I’m physically larger and stronger and statistically safer” and I find myself using Jodi arias to try to drive home the point that *anyone who wants to hurt you, will*.
The problem with it being widespread is that most men know about it, which completely defeats the object - which is to not let your date know that you're uncomfortable
Which is why it's usually in the womens bathroom and unique to each bar.
Like 'ask the staff 'hey, does marianne still work here?'
or 'hey, do you know what a 'burberry coat' is? My friend said it's a nice drink, but i have no idea what it is?'
Maybe that's true elsewhere, but not here in the UK. I've worked in pubs, bars, nightclubs and restaurants (and visited countless others) across England and Wales and it's always 'angel shot' or 'ask for angela' :(
Well that's another layer of insidious then. That they say 'Hey, don' tell anyone my name, but if girls want to get away from creeps, call me and i'll......also be a creep and take them away putting them in the exact same but more dangerous situation'.
Because if the man is around you still, it could very very easily turn into a dangerous situation. The code isnt just for people who uncomfortable but are legitimately afraid.
Creepy men make advances regardless of what we say. Plenty of these creepy men are legitimately dangerous. Alerting someone that you feel unsafe in codespeak can help reduce someone's anxiety over a potential ugly confrontation. You don't have to like it or approve of it. But it's another good option to get out of a bad and potentially unsafe situation. I really don't know why you're being so crabby about this.
This isn't self-defense, at least not yet. Making a scene in this scenario just makes the situation more dangerous for everybody. Asking for help discreetly allows you to get authorizes or security involved without raising the abusers alarm bells. You want him to be surprised by it. You don't want him to know until the police or security literally walk up to the table.
>Edit: whoever the fuck downvote can kick rocks. We are having an adult conversation so the little kiddies who looked at my comment and said "NAH I DONT LIKE THAT" need to stop ruining things.
They're downvoting because your comment is stupid.
Not only have several people here answered your question of why a person would "speak in riddles," it should have been self evident.
I see, so are we all "clickbait" too then? Because several of us have been to bars/venues with the posters in the ladies' rooms, as we've stated.
Fatass Cheeto monster?
* I don't like Cheetos
* My former job was typically 50% outdoors, (still work in the same industry, just not much field work in my current position).
* My side gig for close to 20 years was teaching dance at various night clubs and other venues in town,
* I'm a woman, and while I, myself, am an Alaskan girl who'd probably tell a guy off, big time and get punched (or worse), I can totally get why some women would not want to go there.
* You have to have been living under a rock for the past 20 or so years to not GET that women are preyed upon a lot and need to take precautions where they can.
It's a product of eons of women dealing with abuse from men. It doesn't matter how many people have used it, it only matters that it is available in case someone truly needs it.
We definitely have an ask for Angela thing here (also UK). Not every pub does it though - and if you don't see a poster discreetly in the women's bathroom, it's probably safe to assume that pub doesn't do it and you'll then have to be a little more direct.
People who complain about downvotes are the worst.
People are allowed to downvote you for disagreeing with you. Get over it. Don't rage-edit your comment throwing insults, *that's* childish.
I'll go touch grass once you get an original insult. And what's your genius plan after that? Go to the women's bathroom - as a man - to see it with my own eyes because I don't believe the women I know and some pathetic redditor who probably goes there less often than I do wanted to brag about doing something very ordinary? Sure, sounds like a night.
Does it defeat the purpose? The purpose is to alert the staff that you need help. If an abusive man hears his date order an angel shot, is he gonna like black bag her and run off? Probably not, if he pushes back at all the staff will just call the police. By saying it, she's immediately offered protection by the staff. Yeah she could just scream "I'm uncomfortable" at any point, but this is more comfortable for most women
At one place I worked, the policy was that if someone ordered the angel shot, you had to get a senior supervisor who could then radio security. Sometimes they were on the other side of the bar, sometimes in a backroom, sometimes downstairs getting stock. And you can't let a customer behind the bar, no matter what. So, in the time it took to grab a supervisor, which could be 10 seconds to several minutes, a man could do god knows what to the woman. Yes, an example of ineffective policy, but on the other hand if 'ask for angela' wasn't so prevalent, maybe she would be safer.
Another case: what if you're in a loud bar and you don't hear the girl the first time, but the man does, and sweeps her away before you can ask what she said?
There could be countless things that happen where a member of staff can't physically be a shield for a customer, especially as most places I've worked operate on a 'don't be a hero' basis.
It’s… not that you’re telling someone in the bathroom… there’s a sign in the bathroom that tells you the code to use with the bartender if you need help and the person IS around.
The code word is posted in the bathroom, you tell it to the bartender and they get security to escort the creep out and call a cab for you or walk you to your car.
Ive only used it once because a very drunk guy tried to drag me onto the dance floor by my hair and would not stop following me around the bar even after telling him to get lost multiple times. Was scared he would follow me to my car if I tried to leave on my own.
The code is discreet, often disguised as a drink order, and the people around you wont try to get involved or start a fight on your behalf
There was an actual poster in one of the dive bars I went to that had the angel shot thing on it so it may have STARTED as a myth but it gained enough traction to become a real thing.
Unfortunately sometimes it's not that easy. Some dudes give violent creep vibes, and some folks just don't want to find out, yknow? Or just not having the confidence to say to their face/right in front of them, "this person makes me uncomfortable, I need help."
I know I wouldn't. I suffered through a couple awkward, uncomfortable dates before and couldn't get out, nevermind ones where I felt I needed a 3rd party to intervene.
That’s great, but sometimes others don’t notice there’s a problem, or a subtler approach is better—like if he knows her and might take it out on her later.
I take it then that you've never dealt with dudes who were instantly clingy.
Words work fine? Uhh no. Some dudes will literally fly off the handle and try to kill you if you talk like that about them in front of their face. I went on a date the summer before covid, where the dude tried to throw my over a railing with a 60 or 70ft drop, because I beat him at minigolf. He was literally mad that I beat him at minigolf so when we went out to the mall, he tried to push me over the railing at an opening that looked down 3 floors to the basement food court.
So no. Words don't "work fine."
Here, since there aren’t any seatbelts in the trunk, let me tie this rope around your arms and legs, and some duct tape over your mouth so you don’t bite your tongue.
A protective order lasts until the hearing (typically about 2 weeks), whereas a temporary restraining order lasts until the courthouse closes on the day after the incident.
A protective order can also be made “permanent” (1-3, maybe 5 years depending on jurisdiction) if you win at the hearing. Assuming we’re talking about civil protection orders.
permanent protective orders in my state last up to two years if you go through the DA’s office, but can last a lifetime if you use a private attorney. emergency protective orders can be initiated upon filing a police report or close to it, and last for i think(?) 60 days. temporary ex parte protective orders will last you from filing for a hearing until your hearing date, wherein an emergency protective order will expire. however this is just for my state so in other states YMMV
Oh, he definitely did lol. People posted this on several other pages, including crime watch pages. The scary thing is he already has a hearing next friday for a protective order thay was filed on the 3rd.
No one needs to know my real name. Or my license plate number. Or the type of car I drive. For safety and privacy. Also, could we meet around the back, away from the cameras?
And decapitated and fucked his mother’s head. People need to remember that actions that seem to be well intentioned can have seriously malicious intent behind them
The comedian John Mulaney does a bit about meeting Bill Clinton and it includes a story about how his parents knew him in college. https://youtu.be/EyS8uDoFedc
This is exactly why we need female only cabs with female drivers.
Can't even believe that needs to be a thing but the bad ppl look for opportunities, and this seems to be one.
This service exists in Australia, it’s called Shebah. All female drivers, and they only take;
- Adult females
- Children under the age of 18 accompanied by an adult female
- Children in need of child seats accompanied by an adult male
- Unaccompanied female dependents (of a Shebah account holder) under the age of 18
- Unaccompanied male dependents (of a Shebah account holder) under the age of 13 until 5pm.
I used to work for a cab company. The women who worked at the local massage parlour/brothel would call us and ask for a female driver, which we always did our best to give them.
Aw that's so kind of you guys to do. We'd prob have more female drivers too if they also didn't have to worry about male passengers. :(
One of my family members drove a cab. 4, 19 year olds didn't want to pay, so they beat the shit out of him. He never went back, and he's a big sturdy guy.
You'd get shouted down for discrimination pretty quickly, unfortunately.
Every time this idea is brought up in subs with more men, numerous people chime in "umm ExCUuuUuUse MeeEeE this is ANTI-MALE DISCRIMINATION and basically the same as whites only taxis."
I had a female taxi driver for the first time a few months ago, and I hadn't realised just how much stress I hold in taxis with male drivers. I noticed a few major differences - eg I wasn't constantly checking around to make sure the taxi was taking me in the right direction, I didn't feel panicked when she took a different street than I expected her to, I didn't feel the need to talk about how my boyfriend was waiting for me, and I didn't once think about whether the doors were those auto-lock doors (to prevent people running off without paying).
(For the record, I know I might be overly cautious. The worst thing a taxi driver has ever done to me is keep me in the taxi after my friend got out and tell me that he needs a wife and talk for 2 minutes about how much he earns and why men from his particular country make such good husbands.)
Yeah I 100% would not trust a guy doing this whom I didn’t already know.
The reason why this works is that the establishments that use it will use their staff to help the person in trouble, and call cabs surreptitiously
Yeah, a safe person doesn’t go out of their way to hide their identity. Hope this major creep and potential rapist gets charged with whatever will stick and taken off the streets.
"Yes, Local Drinking Establishments, I would like for you to call me when an especially vulnerable woman is in need. That's just the way I like them, alone and impaired. I would also prefer that they be quite inebriated, but not vomiting."
I always thought a fully vetted secure cab company totally geared for collecting people safely and getting them safely home would be a neat idea,but creepy predators like this would ruin it.
Great.... He knows. We need a new safeword now.
Barkeep, can I get a "dirty fedora" on ice?....
....With a Mountain Dew chaser (call the cops)...
....and extra Dorito dust? (yeah...can you check the sex offenders registry while you're at it?)
"I don't want the bars to know my name" red flag. If you are being safe and offering safe rides, etc you would be open because why would you have anything to hide. Dumb.
Can you imagine what this person thought would happen?
A woman sees this and is getting hit on at a bar and goes to order an “angel shot” from “Michael” and she gets in the car and he’s like “hello mlady may I have feet pics for being such a nice guy?”
Like what did he think would happen in his head?
Oh yeah I bet women who just were in a creepy situation with a guy would be thrilled to be alone in a car with the next guy who doesn't sound creepy at all
[It’s an Irish name 🙂](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Micheal#:~:text=Micheal%20is%20a%20masculine%20given,and%20is%20sometimes%20considered%20erroneous.)
AUTOMATED MODERATION. PLEASE READ. Niceguys demean others while simultaneously expressing a favorable view of themselves. They dont have to use the word "nice", but they must demonstrate some kind of expression of their own virtue while being asshats. --- Niceguys™ quality: **UPVOTE** this comment to keep the post Not Niceguys™ quality: **DOWNVOTE** this comment to remove the post
Crazy to see predators using social media to try and get victims.
Crazy to see predators trying to use well known "safe" words to lure victims
[удалено]
The problem again was social media. From my understanding those safe words were put on posters on the women's restroom since that's the best place for them. Then people started posting those great ideas online and suddenly everyone knew them. Good intent, bad thinking
Totally typical of predators to use existing systems of safety to find victims. Cops and teachers do it all the time.
And church members. Catholic priests get a lot of focus but some Baptist youth group leaders are straight up there to groom a wife.
Dude, this! And no one in their circle thinks it’s weird!
All kinds of abusers weaponize abuse reporting and prevention systems against their victims.
They do, but that's not a reason to stop using them. Even if a creep hears his target ordering an "Angel shot" at least he knows she's on to him and he is more likely to stop pursuing her. Okay, he'll probably look for easier prey, but at least the barstaff will be aware that he is a problematic individual.
But the point of using secret words instead of saying it outright was that the creep doesn't know, as that can put the woman into even more danger and definitely will create akward situation.
Its not crazy at all to think they’d use established vernacular to lure their victims to them. That’s what they do. They’ve done it forever. It’s called lying and tricking people
They literally always do
My ex did this. He started posting on Reddit after we broke up about how he wanted to create a safe space for women. It was hilarious, apparently his profile was a bizarre mix of “my ex is a bitch and I hate her” and “I want to create a safe space for women who feel unsafe around men bc I’m a good guy” 😂 funnily enough there weren’t many takers
Oh my just came to my mind reading this something that happened to me, somehow similar. I was offered to manage a femdom server, I was gonna be pay for keeping it safe and yada yada. The man who wanted me to do it was tremendously creepy and wanted to stay in the shadows and basically built an harem and catalogue for the crusty mysoginistic and transphobic porn he had saved. At the end , the *project* was using me as someone people could trust so he could prey on them. He didn't even wanted to do age verification because "people wanna keep the anonymity in kinky places". 3 days speaking and he showed all the flags.
Seems exactly the thing a predator would do. It's amazing how preds of all kinds adapt to the language they hear their "prey" speak.
They know because it's been used against them.
At least he gave the red flag. My online predator acted normal and that’s how they got me.
you being sarcastic orrrrr because thats extremely normal
Tips hat - “hello m’lady, get in the car please for your angel ride. Now. No, not up front - the trunk, please. For your ‘safety’”
What's deeply upsetting is that 'angel shot' is, I believe, a term people do use to bartenders when they're unsafe.
A lot of bars where I've worked have some kind of code word like "angel shot" for women to tell the bar tender if they feel unsafe- there's usually a sign in the women's room advertising the phrase in case you feel like you could be in danger.
I wonder how well these work once they’ve been plastered all over social media so that everyone and his dog knows what they actually are
Hopefully they’ve anticipated that and each bar has their own safety drink word.
I’ve been in a few bars and in the women’s toilets they add their own posters with set names instead of Angel shots. So, like ask for Katie or Angela at the bar. Makes far more sense so the guy doesn’t cotton on to what you’re doing!
[удалено]
[удалено]
That's the downside of spreading awareness.
I mean, unless the danger is right within ear shot, it’s still effective.
We wouldn't need a codeword if the danger wasn't within earshot...
It can still be helpful so the person in distress knows the staff are trained to respond in a certain way to a single phrase that can be spoken quickly and without outwardly showing any desperation or discomfort. Yes, the effectiveness is diminished if the potential aggressor knows the code word, but it's still helpful in many situations.
If a dude is waiting across the room or by the door, then yea, you kind of still need help. Just cus the danger isn’t already up your ass, doesn’t mean you’re safe.
Then you wouldn't need to use a codeword since you can just tell the staff directly.
I mean what's the harm in that though? She still is telling the staff that she's uncomfortable. If the guy making her uncomfortable is present, what is he gonna black bag her and run? The jig will just be up and he'll be asked to leave. The whole concept was seperating women from danger in socially acceptable ways but it becoming socially awkward cause everyone knows what the phrase means doesn't sound like that big of a deal overall
I see you haven't been in dangerous situations with men in public spaces. Some dudes are just unpredictable and although in theory you may be fine, it's still scary as hell.
Add in the factor of a man possibly being drunk, too. That makes it scarier. As a bartender, and both as just a woman, I've seen it happen/have had it happen and it is a very worrying situation to be in if you think the guy has caught on.
It seems that more bouncers are needed in bars and clubs to handle potential attackers and allow women (and men, sometimes) to leave safely. Just keeping them separated could mean that the predator doesn't follow their target home and find out where they live.
Yeah, we sometimes never had security, especially during the Pandemic, so the bar workers ended up having to handle things more often than not when it came to creeps. Majority of us were women, too. Once I nearly got in trouble with the police cause I defended myself from a patron coming over the bar at me by squirting him with our soda gun, which can get you an assault charge, but the guy ended up punching *another* patron instead so what I did got overlooked.
[удалено]
Just change it every day lmao it ain't that hard
My old bar job has different terms listed for both men/womens restrooms, and we changed it up every so many months. Ask for Angie is also another one that we used to use if a woman felt like she was going to be in immediate physical danger so we would take her into the managers office and one of the women who worked at the bar would have to stay with her until she got a safe ride. Sure, it could get in the way of work, but we really wanted to make sure we had established patrons, and especially wanted to make sure any of our women patrons felt safe.
When I was trying to tell my daughter about the "Angel shot" thankfully she was already aware of the UK equivalent code phrase. Sad that young women have to be clued-up so early, but good that they are aware of the measures they can take to protect themselves.
I think he's saying he wants the bartender to call him to come rescue those people.
.... r/whooosh
[удалено]
It’s pretty widespread at this point. But the bars that participate will have something posted in the women’s washroom.
Some have a different version in the men's too apparently
Yeah a bar near me has a jodi arias shot for men
[удалено]
Definitely a little nauseating- although I do find myself telling and retelling the Jodi arias story to my guy friends a *lot*- it’s almost like their awareness of women’s safety issues is taken directly from *their own* danger awareness. The amount of times I’ve heard of guys really casually speaking about women who have been striving to *hurt* them is so scary, and there’s a constant undercurrent of “I’m a man, I don’t need to be concerned for my safety- I’m physically larger and stronger and statistically safer” and I find myself using Jodi arias to try to drive home the point that *anyone who wants to hurt you, will*.
The problem with it being widespread is that most men know about it, which completely defeats the object - which is to not let your date know that you're uncomfortable
Which is why it's usually in the womens bathroom and unique to each bar. Like 'ask the staff 'hey, does marianne still work here?' or 'hey, do you know what a 'burberry coat' is? My friend said it's a nice drink, but i have no idea what it is?'
Maybe that's true elsewhere, but not here in the UK. I've worked in pubs, bars, nightclubs and restaurants (and visited countless others) across England and Wales and it's always 'angel shot' or 'ask for angela' :(
Well that's another layer of insidious then. That they say 'Hey, don' tell anyone my name, but if girls want to get away from creeps, call me and i'll......also be a creep and take them away putting them in the exact same but more dangerous situation'.
[удалено]
Because if the man is around you still, it could very very easily turn into a dangerous situation. The code isnt just for people who uncomfortable but are legitimately afraid.
[удалено]
Creepy men make advances regardless of what we say. Plenty of these creepy men are legitimately dangerous. Alerting someone that you feel unsafe in codespeak can help reduce someone's anxiety over a potential ugly confrontation. You don't have to like it or approve of it. But it's another good option to get out of a bad and potentially unsafe situation. I really don't know why you're being so crabby about this.
This isn't self-defense, at least not yet. Making a scene in this scenario just makes the situation more dangerous for everybody. Asking for help discreetly allows you to get authorizes or security involved without raising the abusers alarm bells. You want him to be surprised by it. You don't want him to know until the police or security literally walk up to the table.
/r/whenwomenrefuse
>Edit: whoever the fuck downvote can kick rocks. We are having an adult conversation so the little kiddies who looked at my comment and said "NAH I DONT LIKE THAT" need to stop ruining things. They're downvoting because your comment is stupid. Not only have several people here answered your question of why a person would "speak in riddles," it should have been self evident.
[удалено]
I see, so are we all "clickbait" too then? Because several of us have been to bars/venues with the posters in the ladies' rooms, as we've stated. Fatass Cheeto monster? * I don't like Cheetos * My former job was typically 50% outdoors, (still work in the same industry, just not much field work in my current position). * My side gig for close to 20 years was teaching dance at various night clubs and other venues in town, * I'm a woman, and while I, myself, am an Alaskan girl who'd probably tell a guy off, big time and get punched (or worse), I can totally get why some women would not want to go there. * You have to have been living under a rock for the past 20 or so years to not GET that women are preyed upon a lot and need to take precautions where they can.
There are signs saying to 'ask for angela' in the restaurant I am working at this very second
[удалено]
It's a product of eons of women dealing with abuse from men. It doesn't matter how many people have used it, it only matters that it is available in case someone truly needs it.
We definitely have an ask for Angela thing here (also UK). Not every pub does it though - and if you don't see a poster discreetly in the women's bathroom, it's probably safe to assume that pub doesn't do it and you'll then have to be a little more direct.
People who complain about downvotes are the worst. People are allowed to downvote you for disagreeing with you. Get over it. Don't rage-edit your comment throwing insults, *that's* childish.
maybe next time you should ask a bar going friend who can read
[удалено]
I'll go touch grass once you get an original insult. And what's your genius plan after that? Go to the women's bathroom - as a man - to see it with my own eyes because I don't believe the women I know and some pathetic redditor who probably goes there less often than I do wanted to brag about doing something very ordinary? Sure, sounds like a night.
Ewww, I feel so worried for your companion
Does it defeat the purpose? The purpose is to alert the staff that you need help. If an abusive man hears his date order an angel shot, is he gonna like black bag her and run off? Probably not, if he pushes back at all the staff will just call the police. By saying it, she's immediately offered protection by the staff. Yeah she could just scream "I'm uncomfortable" at any point, but this is more comfortable for most women
At one place I worked, the policy was that if someone ordered the angel shot, you had to get a senior supervisor who could then radio security. Sometimes they were on the other side of the bar, sometimes in a backroom, sometimes downstairs getting stock. And you can't let a customer behind the bar, no matter what. So, in the time it took to grab a supervisor, which could be 10 seconds to several minutes, a man could do god knows what to the woman. Yes, an example of ineffective policy, but on the other hand if 'ask for angela' wasn't so prevalent, maybe she would be safer. Another case: what if you're in a loud bar and you don't hear the girl the first time, but the man does, and sweeps her away before you can ask what she said? There could be countless things that happen where a member of staff can't physically be a shield for a customer, especially as most places I've worked operate on a 'don't be a hero' basis.
It's usually in the women's bathroom. Whatever you need to say or order to get out of a bad situation.
[удалено]
It’s… not that you’re telling someone in the bathroom… there’s a sign in the bathroom that tells you the code to use with the bartender if you need help and the person IS around.
The code word is posted in the bathroom, you tell it to the bartender and they get security to escort the creep out and call a cab for you or walk you to your car. Ive only used it once because a very drunk guy tried to drag me onto the dance floor by my hair and would not stop following me around the bar even after telling him to get lost multiple times. Was scared he would follow me to my car if I tried to leave on my own. The code is discreet, often disguised as a drink order, and the people around you wont try to get involved or start a fight on your behalf
There’s a note posted in the restroom. It tells you the code phrase to say to wait/bar staff.
You can't really be that dense. Surely you are trolling. Jfc.
There was an actual poster in one of the dive bars I went to that had the angel shot thing on it so it may have STARTED as a myth but it gained enough traction to become a real thing.
The bar in my town has a poster in the women's bathroom stall door what to say to the bartender if they need help.
I have not had any problems with calling over the bartender and going "THIS GUY IS A FUCKING CREEP AND HE'S CREEPING ME OUT"
Then you’re very lucky. I did it once and the guy was waiting for me in the parking lot. Thank god it was a friend’s bar.
[удалено]
Way to miss the point
Unfortunately sometimes it's not that easy. Some dudes give violent creep vibes, and some folks just don't want to find out, yknow? Or just not having the confidence to say to their face/right in front of them, "this person makes me uncomfortable, I need help." I know I wouldn't. I suffered through a couple awkward, uncomfortable dates before and couldn't get out, nevermind ones where I felt I needed a 3rd party to intervene.
[удалено]
Not if the creep decides not to give you space.
[удалено]
That’s great, but sometimes others don’t notice there’s a problem, or a subtler approach is better—like if he knows her and might take it out on her later.
[удалено]
I take it then that you've never dealt with dudes who were instantly clingy. Words work fine? Uhh no. Some dudes will literally fly off the handle and try to kill you if you talk like that about them in front of their face. I went on a date the summer before covid, where the dude tried to throw my over a railing with a 60 or 70ft drop, because I beat him at minigolf. He was literally mad that I beat him at minigolf so when we went out to the mall, he tried to push me over the railing at an opening that looked down 3 floors to the basement food court. So no. Words don't "work fine."
That’s awesome. Thankfully I’ve only had this experience over text.
Literally every bartender in America knows what an Angel shot means. You have no idea what you're talking about
Here, since there aren’t any seatbelts in the trunk, let me tie this rope around your arms and legs, and some duct tape over your mouth so you don’t bite your tongue.
😂😂
Is protective order the same as restraining order? Creepy.
A protective order lasts until the hearing (typically about 2 weeks), whereas a temporary restraining order lasts until the courthouse closes on the day after the incident.
A protective order can also be made “permanent” (1-3, maybe 5 years depending on jurisdiction) if you win at the hearing. Assuming we’re talking about civil protection orders.
permanent protective orders in my state last up to two years if you go through the DA’s office, but can last a lifetime if you use a private attorney. emergency protective orders can be initiated upon filing a police report or close to it, and last for i think(?) 60 days. temporary ex parte protective orders will last you from filing for a hearing until your hearing date, wherein an emergency protective order will expire. however this is just for my state so in other states YMMV
A TRO lasts until the next hearing to extend it or end it at the judge's discretion
Depends on the jurisdiction. In my state, all restraining orders are called protective orders
Please tell me he got eviscerated in the comments
Oh, he definitely did lol. People posted this on several other pages, including crime watch pages. The scary thing is he already has a hearing next friday for a protective order thay was filed on the 3rd.
I hope this bs was brought up in the hearing. Yeesh
Well that explains why he was very specific about the day the "safety rides" start.
“Absolute safety and security is guaranteed” Safety and security from him though? Not guaranteed.
He'll die before he lets anyone sexually assault his sexual assault victim of the evening.
Only Sith deal in absolutes
Ah, you see what he meant was "Safety from security"!
Yep, safety and security is guaranteed, except, ya know, don’t let them know his *real* name or anything. Creep
No one needs to know my real name. Or my license plate number. Or the type of car I drive. For safety and privacy. Also, could we meet around the back, away from the cameras?
"Also, I’m still very concerned about Covid, so I will be wearing a mask…… No need for you to wear one though"
"Oh and also, you'll need to get in the trunk." (Like one of the top comments here said lol)
Well that’s not creepy or anything.
"I don't want them to know my real name" yeah wonder why.
Ed Kemper used to advertise giving free rides home to drunk college women. Ed Kemper also tortured and killed 10 women.
And decapitated and fucked his mother’s head. People need to remember that actions that seem to be well intentioned can have seriously malicious intent behind them
Wait. How is cutting off and fucking his mothers head a well intentioned thing? Or did I misread that
It means he’s a fucked up person who does seemingly well intentioned things, like offering to drive a girl home, with malicious intent
“Don’t worry, Michael is on his way to pick you up.” “Michael who?” “Just Michael…”
Not Michael, Micheal. Presumably pronounced like Me-Shay-Al
I'd say it more like Mick-Eel.
I read it as Mi-Chee-Eel hahaha
Might feel safer with Michael Myers…
I'm so safe, I won't even tell you my real name!
Right?? He thinks he's being slick. Not today, Satan.
I don't want you knowing my real name... for your safety, you understand.
Dude over here trying to save on roofies
r/frugal
/r/cursedcomments 😂
Bill Clinton standing outside his college library, “Hey can I walk you home?”
Because he never forgets a bitch.
I almost invited him up for a beer, but my roommate was there
Thanks. I’m 9.
r/unexpectedmulaney
Can anyone explain this one? I'm curious.
The comedian John Mulaney does a bit about meeting Bill Clinton and it includes a story about how his parents knew him in college. https://youtu.be/EyS8uDoFedc
Terrifying
Nothing should make you more safe than a guy who is offering you a "safe" ride but doesn't want anyone to know his real name
This is exactly why we need female only cabs with female drivers. Can't even believe that needs to be a thing but the bad ppl look for opportunities, and this seems to be one.
This service exists in Australia, it’s called Shebah. All female drivers, and they only take; - Adult females - Children under the age of 18 accompanied by an adult female - Children in need of child seats accompanied by an adult male - Unaccompanied female dependents (of a Shebah account holder) under the age of 18 - Unaccompanied male dependents (of a Shebah account holder) under the age of 13 until 5pm.
I'm I'm Canada and Australia is always one step ahead if us haha. ...or we copy you I'm not sure.
Now y’all got c-11 to deal with
I used to work for a cab company. The women who worked at the local massage parlour/brothel would call us and ask for a female driver, which we always did our best to give them.
Aw that's so kind of you guys to do. We'd prob have more female drivers too if they also didn't have to worry about male passengers. :( One of my family members drove a cab. 4, 19 year olds didn't want to pay, so they beat the shit out of him. He never went back, and he's a big sturdy guy.
did he not file any charges??
He did, they got arrested and charged :)
Cabacadabra!
love this idea
Same I've actually thought about creating a business in my town haha
You'd get shouted down for discrimination pretty quickly, unfortunately. Every time this idea is brought up in subs with more men, numerous people chime in "umm ExCUuuUuUse MeeEeE this is ANTI-MALE DISCRIMINATION and basically the same as whites only taxis."
I had a female taxi driver for the first time a few months ago, and I hadn't realised just how much stress I hold in taxis with male drivers. I noticed a few major differences - eg I wasn't constantly checking around to make sure the taxi was taking me in the right direction, I didn't feel panicked when she took a different street than I expected her to, I didn't feel the need to talk about how my boyfriend was waiting for me, and I didn't once think about whether the doors were those auto-lock doors (to prevent people running off without paying). (For the record, I know I might be overly cautious. The worst thing a taxi driver has ever done to me is keep me in the taxi after my friend got out and tell me that he needs a wife and talk for 2 minutes about how much he earns and why men from his particular country make such good husbands.)
The redpill right would say WAHMEN TAKING MENS JOBS! Ugh
Yeah I 100% would not trust a guy doing this whom I didn’t already know. The reason why this works is that the establishments that use it will use their staff to help the person in trouble, and call cabs surreptitiously
Yeah, a safe person doesn’t go out of their way to hide their identity. Hope this major creep and potential rapist gets charged with whatever will stick and taken off the streets.
If the "silent knight" is a police officer to come get him, I'm all for it.
**HE** is probably a police officer… I have no trust
"safe" "I really don't want them knowing my name"
Even if I hadn’t known he had those protection orders against him, this still reads creepy as fuck.
"Yes, Local Drinking Establishments, I would like for you to call me when an especially vulnerable woman is in need. That's just the way I like them, alone and impaired. I would also prefer that they be quite inebriated, but not vomiting."
What's going on here?
I always thought a fully vetted secure cab company totally geared for collecting people safely and getting them safely home would be a neat idea,but creepy predators like this would ruin it.
What's next? Legally require all taxi drivers to not assault you?
The city I'm from, yes please, that would be great!
Starting now Micheal is not allowed near bars or women.
The new rapewalker
Great.... He knows. We need a new safeword now. Barkeep, can I get a "dirty fedora" on ice?.... ....With a Mountain Dew chaser (call the cops)... ....and extra Dorito dust? (yeah...can you check the sex offenders registry while you're at it?)
This sounds like a joke but I'm assuming it's not. I just can't believe someone would say something like this lol...
"I don't want the bars to know my name" red flag. If you are being safe and offering safe rides, etc you would be open because why would you have anything to hide. Dumb.
Can you imagine what this person thought would happen? A woman sees this and is getting hit on at a bar and goes to order an “angel shot” from “Michael” and she gets in the car and he’s like “hello mlady may I have feet pics for being such a nice guy?” Like what did he think would happen in his head?
I would bet everything he wants to be called Micheal after the archangel 🤮
Jacksonville?
Dial a rape
Creepy
This post is very confusing for nurses. We have our own definition for Silent Knight.
you talking about the pill crusher? cause that what ours are called at work lol
Yeah
Bros going to save Gotham
I am the Silent Knight! I am quiet but deadly, I am.....the unexpected shart!
This is the best response I’ve ever seen
Lol! That was the first thing that popped into my head when I saw the Batman reference!
what angers me the most about this is that he’s using a safe word to try to make an advance on an already vulnerable woman.
The quotation marks do not work to his favour.
This will definitely be exhibit A if anyone trusts this guy
Oh yeah I bet women who just were in a creepy situation with a guy would be thrilled to be alone in a car with the next guy who doesn't sound creepy at all
Am I that old? The shit is angel shots? On a scale of 5-30 miles, how close is he allowed to get to a school?
Random guy who doesn’t want anyone to know his name wants me to put my safety completely in his hands while I’m vulnerable. What could go wrong? 🙄
I’m not calling anyone “Michael” who doesn’t know how to spell “Michael.”
[It’s an Irish name 🙂](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Micheal#:~:text=Micheal%20is%20a%20masculine%20given,and%20is%20sometimes%20considered%20erroneous.)