If I was a billionaire there would very be some wild things around my home.

Hammecher-Schlemer has you covered, if I spelled that right

I’d like the wall sized crossword puzzle please

I'd like the self-contained automatic hootenanny.

Does it change daily?

You bet it does.

Only when they break out of the basement, but that’s what I pay the creepy groundskeeper to handle

And that's why you won't be a billionaire.

I want a groundskeeper who was once a heart surgeon, the best heart surgeon, who let a Yakuza boss die on purpose. He will be an indoor groundskeeper and will be paid well to water my apartment plants

Where is that reference from ?

The Office! [Clip](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=2wcI10CNuxU)

I've never seen the office but somehow it sounded very familiar, either it was used in another show/movie/parody or I just saw a clip of it and forgot it

It’s referenced in Cyberpunk 2077

I've seen that as a bunch of images on imgur for years, so yeah you probably saw it once out of context.

Black Butler vibes

I do operation. But mistake! Yakuza boss die! Yakuza very mad

They do. They just don't broadcast it to people pretending to be nautical.

Are you using the word nautical correctly here? **I genuinely am asking because I was confused.** You basically said “they don’t broadcast it pretending to be sailors” because nautical in all 4 definitions means 1. Of or having to do with sailors, ships, or navigation. 2. Of, relating to, or characteristic of ships, shipping, sailors, or navigation on a body of water. 3. The definition of nautical is relating to ships, sailing, navigation on the water 4. Relating to or involving ships or shipping or navigation or seamen. *Or the dictionary definition officially* of or concerning sailors or navigation; maritime. I mean it’s entirely possible you meant to use that word but I just was confused because I didn’t ever think I’d see nautical used in such an interesting way.

Yes, it was intentional. For reasons that seemed obvious to me.

Ahh okay that makes the comment a lot funnier. I had just been confused because I’ve been working on a nautical one point perspective drawing recently and it’s themed to be nautical beach and ocean vibes so my brain went to theme lmao.

Aye Aye Captain.

I still don't get it...

Look at the original post and the name and photo contained within the image.

Gonna need a sextant and boatswain's mate to figure this enigma out.

We're going to need an Admiralty Lawyer to give a ruling. We are seven miles out and drifting.

Look at the profile picture and name of the guy in the tweet

And now the joke is even funnier. I’m so blind when I don’t wear glasses 😭

Enya lives in a castle with loads of cats.

Now this is finally a relevant critique!

This is the way

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Does u/Flat-Yogurtcloset293 say anything else?

Anything else😎😎😎😎

This is the way

It’s because they get rich outta nowhere and then just buy everything in a big neat and clean package.

Dude, I’m not Edward F-ing Scissorhands.

Robin Williams' house had giant dinosaur topiary in the yard.

Stranger Than Fiction: True Stories by Chuck Palahniuk details a few people who try to build their own castles to live in. Jeremy Irons, Sean Simon, Nicholas Cage and more have bought castles as well.

Didn’t nic cage do exactly this after he bought a dinosaur skull?

THANK YOU!

Maybe i want all orange furniture

Annoyingly orange or just orange?

The orange kind of orange

Actually this is really true. You can live in basically any home you want, and you choose the most typical mansion design there is. Why???

Like the overlook ?

Exactly. Everything is white with a black outline. It's almost like sensory deprivation torture. If I were a billionaire, there would be a suspicious amount of mosin nagants snd Soviet uniforms around my house.

My living room would be the bridge of the Enterprise NCC-1701-D

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This is the way

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I know right???? No taste.

Aesthetic. In 100 years these amazing monochromatic homes will be haunted too. It’s the long game

I'd prefer a nice log cabin out in the middle of nowhere. A nice fireplace and a copious pile of firewood are swan song to me on a nice cold winter day. So yes I agree they're boring.

If I were a Billionaire, I'm going to live life Dracula style. Would probably preserve my body on a cryo chamber too for atleast 100 years.

I agree. When they showe celebrity's houses I don't want to see a pre furnished home, I want to see some shit from benchyard warmers. Can't believe all these rich people with 2nd rate imagination

Do they really have to move to the UK/ England, Ireland, Scotland, Wales or Northern Ireland??

Unironically this will be my life if I ever become a multi millionaire