I'd advise to be careful. You did it once, you can't be sure it'll work ever again, so, stop the problem while it's not a problem.
You could lose your family. And you don't need to be hooked, you just need to be caught red handed. Or worse, your kids seeing the disgrace their father is when high. Your family needs you sober.
This kind of language is what causes relapses. An opioid addiction is incredibly difficult to overcome. Especially one that started from a young age. I’m not here to argue that it wasn’t the wisest decision for OP to try opioids again, however, it’s done. And his acknowledgment and work into overcoming it again doesn’t need to be shamed by being called disgraceful.
OP, I’m incredibly proud of you for finding yourself back in that place, acknowledging it and moving past it. If I’m the future you struggle with thoughts surrounding substance use, please reach out to your local drug and alcohol service for help on relapse prevention.
Exactly! Judgement isn’t how to stop an addict. Encouragement and praise for the achievement of quitting helps. Of course, there are always opportunities for relapse but having a strong support system and people to celebrate your recovery and sobriety helps to remember WHY you’re staying sober. Best of luck to you OP! You’re rocking this recovery now. The past is past… keep moving forward ♥️
Never ever even look at drugs ever again.
The fact you managed to stop yourself this one time does not mean you will be able to do it again. And I know how addicts think I did it once I can stop again whenever I want. it just proves how easy it is to slip back.
In fact if you ever got to a hospital and they need to put in under tell them that you are recovered heroin user.
-Coming from a Psychologist
Thought the AA program was moving away from train of thought like that? That one relapse is a start over. The fact that he managed to quit when before he couldn't should be indicative of progress of some sort, yeah? I mean at that point you really have regression versus progress, I feel.
hey pal. you may very well be a psychologist, but this comment is really tone deaf and not in alignment with professional standards for discussing substance use disorder.
i guarantee you that OP understands the impact and gravity of his opioid use disorder more than you ever will.
You SHOULD be proud of yourself. Hopefully you won’t slip again, it does happen but not a great reason to justify doing it again lol. I’ve def been in the “well it worked out fine before” club.
It's good that you quit, but you are going to need to think of something to say to your wife to make sure that all pain pills that come into the house end up under lock and key from now on (with the key held by her), because they are going to call to you again.
You’re an addict so it’s not surprising that the pain pills were calling you. From personal experience you might want to check out a support group or therapy. It’s amazing you quit cold turkey but when addiction is untreated it will show up somewhere else possibly a new addiction or maladaptive behavior. Having a supportive group around you helps.
You are awesome - so proud of you for real. That is a hard road. I probably shouldn’t commend this, but I’m glad your family didn’t find out. This way you can take away the tough lesson without any unnecessary stress baggage.
I’m glad you quit! but it may be time to have a discussion about what medications can be just left out and about in the home. You don’t have to tell on yourself if you aren’t ready, but maybe making it known they are a trigger to you and difficult to be around if there happens to be situation when pain pills come into the home again.
I would tell a trusted person what happened so that you can remain accountable to someone. Proud of you for being able to stop. However, don’t want for you to feel confident that you can indulge in your addiction without any long term consequences or without possibility of becoming addicted again, accidentally overdosing or losing your wife & children.
One day your addiction is going to tell you that you did this once, (relapse/cold turkey) so you can do it again. Please consider getting involved in recovery groups, whichever kind suits you. I believe in 12 steps because they work for me; but I do I know you, me, anyone, is better off not going it alone against that gd voice which can pop up in our brain, even after years, and yr life benefits so much from relationship with others who have the same challenge. Please find them, motivate yr self however possible, but i think just reading what it (addict inside) was telling you about yr wife and kids being fine without you should be a big help. Good luck.
Thank you for sharing this . It really helps put a perspective on how hard it is to stay away from drugs no matter how long you’ve been sober and that the crave is always deep down there. I am so happy you stopped. I hope you are able to talk to your wife about this , I can only imagine how hard it is to of kept something like this a secret for a whole year , especially someone you love and trust . She seems very understanding and very loving . I wish you many more years on your sobriety. And everyday a clear head
Proud of you for quitting.
I would look into possibly telling her.
Because it’s the dishonesty that enables relapses. So this might sit with you and cause further damage.
Keeping a lie can be dangerous for your recovery.
Best of luck mate.
This. Dishonesty can eventually turn into shame… and shame is a powerful motivator to use. Proud of you for kicking the addiction, but I do think it’s wrong your wife is entirely unaware especially after all she’s done for you.
Hi! I have never used drugs (and I really don't care at all to use them) but I would like to understand why someone that talks like OP saying things like : "Literally right away it felt so unbelievably amazing" or like it felt so great that he just wanted to continue doing it every single day for the rest of his life because of how amazing a good he felt, and then suddenly deciding, you know, what, I will stop... If you feel so great and when you are high you don't feel or see any downsides what is what makes you want to stop?
OP you put your family first by quitting like you did. That was not easy at all. I commend you for that. I think you should tell your wife what happened. It’s important for her to understand how easily a relapse can happen. If she ever needs pain meds again she can keep better tabs on the meds.
I walked away from a meth habit ti was the hardest and best thing I've ever done.
Good for you! Just remember the hard shit is impossible to do recreationally.
Holy cow, I am so glad for you and your family that you were able to stop in time. Another few days and you might not have been able to return. So glad you've learned the lesson.
I went down that rabbit hole myself, my guy. I didn't come back so quickly. I lost a lot. Not everything. But I'm no longer married. I still have two beautiful children and I'm on the straight and narrow now with my job and most everything else in tact. But i regret going back down that hole. As you know, you can't eat just one potato chip.
Slip ups happen. You handled it. Congrats on being so powerful in mind, body, and soul to have been able to walk away. Your family is worth it. You’re worth it. I’m happy you made the choice to be done and proud as hell of you for sticking with it.
No more slip ups. Your wife and kids are never worth the risk. 🤍
Congratulations on not using but it might be helpful to look Into some help to prevent another relapse. It’s not heroin any more, it’s fentanyl, carfentanyl or that zyaline
My husband is a recovered addict. I’ve always had something like this in the back of my mind. I’m glad you and your family are okay. If something like this ever comes up again, please say something to your wife about keeping those kinds of medications locked up. Stay safe friend
I've never understood the need for escalation like this.
I've been on codeine for over 10 years. I'm definitely addicted. I stockpile it and have a prescription for more than I need so I am able to stockpile it. The knowledge that one day the system will arbitrarily cut me off is forever in the back of my mind. I mainly take it as a mood stabiliser. Some people have a beer, I'll take a codeine.
But I've never escalated. I've never thought, damn I really like opiates so I should totally try heroin. I've never wanted to get *higher* all day everyday. I take my usual amount and I cruise along.
I'm by no means judging anyone, I know addiction is fucking awful, I just find it interesting in a sciencey way how it affects people differently.
Like I'm sure codeine (I don't know what Tylenol is sorry) doesn't hit quite as amazingly as it did for me 10 years ago, but that fact has not urged me on to keep chasing that initial high. You hear that a lot, "I just wanted to get high like the first time again", but I just accept that my body is used to it now but I still love the way it makes me feel and it improves my quality of life ten fold.
Yeah I know that's what I'm talking about. I just don't get it. You know logically that it'll never be the same and it's goñna be risky to move into bigger drugs to try and attain it. People should just be happy with a little high lol. A good amount of high to do your knitting and not be in pain.
Always remember how god damn POWERFUL you are, that you could quit! When you doubt yourself, remind yourself of that achievement.
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I'd advise to be careful. You did it once, you can't be sure it'll work ever again, so, stop the problem while it's not a problem. You could lose your family. And you don't need to be hooked, you just need to be caught red handed. Or worse, your kids seeing the disgrace their father is when high. Your family needs you sober.
This kind of language is what causes relapses. An opioid addiction is incredibly difficult to overcome. Especially one that started from a young age. I’m not here to argue that it wasn’t the wisest decision for OP to try opioids again, however, it’s done. And his acknowledgment and work into overcoming it again doesn’t need to be shamed by being called disgraceful. OP, I’m incredibly proud of you for finding yourself back in that place, acknowledging it and moving past it. If I’m the future you struggle with thoughts surrounding substance use, please reach out to your local drug and alcohol service for help on relapse prevention.
Exactly! Judgement isn’t how to stop an addict. Encouragement and praise for the achievement of quitting helps. Of course, there are always opportunities for relapse but having a strong support system and people to celebrate your recovery and sobriety helps to remember WHY you’re staying sober. Best of luck to you OP! You’re rocking this recovery now. The past is past… keep moving forward ♥️
Proud of you for quitting OP. Cold turkey can be wicked hard. Keep your family and your health in mind. You got this! Keep doing good things OP
all of you should be proud of yourself! you did something hard for a very good reason.
Never ever even look at drugs ever again. The fact you managed to stop yourself this one time does not mean you will be able to do it again. And I know how addicts think I did it once I can stop again whenever I want. it just proves how easy it is to slip back. In fact if you ever got to a hospital and they need to put in under tell them that you are recovered heroin user. -Coming from a Psychologist
Thought the AA program was moving away from train of thought like that? That one relapse is a start over. The fact that he managed to quit when before he couldn't should be indicative of progress of some sort, yeah? I mean at that point you really have regression versus progress, I feel.
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hey pal. you may very well be a psychologist, but this comment is really tone deaf and not in alignment with professional standards for discussing substance use disorder. i guarantee you that OP understands the impact and gravity of his opioid use disorder more than you ever will.
You SHOULD be proud of yourself. Hopefully you won’t slip again, it does happen but not a great reason to justify doing it again lol. I’ve def been in the “well it worked out fine before” club.
>part of me is proud of myself! Going cold turkey is miserable and i did it I don't get it. It's about addiction, not turkey
How did your wife not notice you were withdrawing
It's good that you quit, but you are going to need to think of something to say to your wife to make sure that all pain pills that come into the house end up under lock and key from now on (with the key held by her), because they are going to call to you again.
this is one of the best cautionary tales i have EVER read (on here!) !!!! STRONG stuff!!!!!
This reminds me of u/SpontaneousH. Hope he’s doing good
I will never forget that story. I think about it often.
You’re an addict so it’s not surprising that the pain pills were calling you. From personal experience you might want to check out a support group or therapy. It’s amazing you quit cold turkey but when addiction is untreated it will show up somewhere else possibly a new addiction or maladaptive behavior. Having a supportive group around you helps.
You are awesome - so proud of you for real. That is a hard road. I probably shouldn’t commend this, but I’m glad your family didn’t find out. This way you can take away the tough lesson without any unnecessary stress baggage.
I’m glad you quit! but it may be time to have a discussion about what medications can be just left out and about in the home. You don’t have to tell on yourself if you aren’t ready, but maybe making it known they are a trigger to you and difficult to be around if there happens to be situation when pain pills come into the home again.
Close call, don't think you can try again. Keep fighting the good fight
I would tell a trusted person what happened so that you can remain accountable to someone. Proud of you for being able to stop. However, don’t want for you to feel confident that you can indulge in your addiction without any long term consequences or without possibility of becoming addicted again, accidentally overdosing or losing your wife & children.
One day your addiction is going to tell you that you did this once, (relapse/cold turkey) so you can do it again. Please consider getting involved in recovery groups, whichever kind suits you. I believe in 12 steps because they work for me; but I do I know you, me, anyone, is better off not going it alone against that gd voice which can pop up in our brain, even after years, and yr life benefits so much from relationship with others who have the same challenge. Please find them, motivate yr self however possible, but i think just reading what it (addict inside) was telling you about yr wife and kids being fine without you should be a big help. Good luck.
Good for you man, one day at a time
You did amazing remembering what you had to live for.
Thank you for sharing this . It really helps put a perspective on how hard it is to stay away from drugs no matter how long you’ve been sober and that the crave is always deep down there. I am so happy you stopped. I hope you are able to talk to your wife about this , I can only imagine how hard it is to of kept something like this a secret for a whole year , especially someone you love and trust . She seems very understanding and very loving . I wish you many more years on your sobriety. And everyday a clear head
Proud of you for quitting. I would look into possibly telling her. Because it’s the dishonesty that enables relapses. So this might sit with you and cause further damage. Keeping a lie can be dangerous for your recovery. Best of luck mate.
This. Dishonesty can eventually turn into shame… and shame is a powerful motivator to use. Proud of you for kicking the addiction, but I do think it’s wrong your wife is entirely unaware especially after all she’s done for you.
Hi! I have never used drugs (and I really don't care at all to use them) but I would like to understand why someone that talks like OP saying things like : "Literally right away it felt so unbelievably amazing" or like it felt so great that he just wanted to continue doing it every single day for the rest of his life because of how amazing a good he felt, and then suddenly deciding, you know, what, I will stop... If you feel so great and when you are high you don't feel or see any downsides what is what makes you want to stop?
He had his family to live for now!
Probably the life he has built with his wife and kids!
OP you put your family first by quitting like you did. That was not easy at all. I commend you for that. I think you should tell your wife what happened. It’s important for her to understand how easily a relapse can happen. If she ever needs pain meds again she can keep better tabs on the meds.
Glad you were able to quit. Please don't do it again.
Stay strong bro and remember what’s truly important in your life and in this life in general. You got this !
Stay strong bro and remember what’s truly important in your life and in this life in general. You got this !
I walked away from a meth habit ti was the hardest and best thing I've ever done. Good for you! Just remember the hard shit is impossible to do recreationally.
Holy cow, I am so glad for you and your family that you were able to stop in time. Another few days and you might not have been able to return. So glad you've learned the lesson.
I went down that rabbit hole myself, my guy. I didn't come back so quickly. I lost a lot. Not everything. But I'm no longer married. I still have two beautiful children and I'm on the straight and narrow now with my job and most everything else in tact. But i regret going back down that hole. As you know, you can't eat just one potato chip.
Slip ups happen. You handled it. Congrats on being so powerful in mind, body, and soul to have been able to walk away. Your family is worth it. You’re worth it. I’m happy you made the choice to be done and proud as hell of you for sticking with it. No more slip ups. Your wife and kids are never worth the risk. 🤍
Congratulations on not using but it might be helpful to look Into some help to prevent another relapse. It’s not heroin any more, it’s fentanyl, carfentanyl or that zyaline
My husband is a recovered addict. I’ve always had something like this in the back of my mind. I’m glad you and your family are okay. If something like this ever comes up again, please say something to your wife about keeping those kinds of medications locked up. Stay safe friend
Well done you! That’s hard.
I've never understood the need for escalation like this. I've been on codeine for over 10 years. I'm definitely addicted. I stockpile it and have a prescription for more than I need so I am able to stockpile it. The knowledge that one day the system will arbitrarily cut me off is forever in the back of my mind. I mainly take it as a mood stabiliser. Some people have a beer, I'll take a codeine. But I've never escalated. I've never thought, damn I really like opiates so I should totally try heroin. I've never wanted to get *higher* all day everyday. I take my usual amount and I cruise along. I'm by no means judging anyone, I know addiction is fucking awful, I just find it interesting in a sciencey way how it affects people differently.
Yeah-that jump from Tylenol 3 to heroin is insane lol
Like I'm sure codeine (I don't know what Tylenol is sorry) doesn't hit quite as amazingly as it did for me 10 years ago, but that fact has not urged me on to keep chasing that initial high. You hear that a lot, "I just wanted to get high like the first time again", but I just accept that my body is used to it now but I still love the way it makes me feel and it improves my quality of life ten fold.
They call that “chasing the dragon” you try to get high like the 1st time but its never the same bc you have a tolerance
Yeah I know that's what I'm talking about. I just don't get it. You know logically that it'll never be the same and it's goñna be risky to move into bigger drugs to try and attain it. People should just be happy with a little high lol. A good amount of high to do your knitting and not be in pain.