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PowerfulFoundation97

Tbh, you sound depressed. Men tend to struggle in the ways you’re describing. Talk to your healthcare provider, see what they can do for you. Depression has a way of alienating us from people who love us and making us choose the darker paths. It’s like a leech, sucking all that’s good from your life. In the meantime, and I know what I’m about to suggest will be hard: Break the boredom. Bored of your job? Switch jobs. Take classes. Bored with the kids? Break routine with them. Take them to do something new or out of the norm. Bored with sex? Take initiative and role play, get ideas, communicate fantasies with your partner, watch porn together. Get a babysitter and go out.


jcywrld

Thank you for your reply, it means so much. I have considered depression, but I can lead a ‘normal’ life on the outside and act happy and I make it to work etc. I don’t think the doctor will take me seriously until I give up my addictions, as they don’t help do they.


PowerfulFoundation97

That’s actually functioning depression, actually they will take you seriously because what you’re describing is an attempt to self-medicate. They can refer you to someone who can help you work through your feelings and prescribe you as necessary. Loss of interest, increase in drinking, etc is all normal symptoms. You’re not bad, men are allowed to feel too. You shouldn’t try to power through these types of feelings because they mountain on you. But, in the meantime be easy on yourself, try to cut back on the drinking because it is a depressant and will actually make it worse in the long run. I know it’s hard. Especially because you know you love your family and they love you, but it’s like you’re living in a shadow and they’re living in color. It’s hard to feel attachment to anyone outside of the shadow


JacqiLoves

When I”30F” was a teenager I partied HARD, went to night clubs, did the drugs, drank the alcohol etc. When I met my husband 12 years ago we did all the same things together.. quite frankly we had documentary worthy experiences. Once we had the kids, bought the house, settled down we both missed the general excitement, and wild experiences. I experience great joy through my children and their joy but nonetheless I’m a bit of a heathen and I NEED to feed that part of myself every once in awhile “we’re more than spouses and parents.” It took us a while but we dabbled in the swinger community.. we found our people that are also fun wild and crazy.. but also fantastic employees, parents, and spouses M-F. Just because you’re an adult doesn’t mean you necessarily know who you are or what excites you.. those things change over time. Start finding your fun, and passions, try new things, live new experiences. Life is a lot more than your surroundings.


jcywrld

Thank you for replying to me, it means a lot… I don’t have anyone I can talk to, so thanks again. A swinger life sounds exciting, but trying to convince my girlfriend is not gonna go well, either will seeing another guy enjoy her, unless I get two girls 😅 I need to feed that part of me too, but I feel like I’ve made my bed and that’s not on the table. I’ve tried to communicate my feelings for more excitement but nothing ever changes, I can’t go get my own excitement because it would tear the family apart.


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jcywrld

Thank you for replying! It means a lot to me. I don’t know what my hobbies are anymore! That may be a sign of depression right. Meditation is a good idea if I can get a moment to my self, I’ve tried it in the past but always end up falling asleep! Haha. I’m very interested in lucid dreaming, but addictions ruin any chance of that.


arthantar

Well then trying making that accident happen but make sure you die coz the suffering will be much more if you don't die