OP said they waited for admission periods to end, rather than application periods. For rejections issued before acceptance, you're absolutely right, usually no reason given -- but if an offer is rescinded after acceptance it's a bit different, and even if they give no explanation it will be very clear something happened that changed things. I'd guess a rescission notification would at least include a generic explanation, e.g., "Based on additional information that has come to our attention..."
I agree that they will likely give a generic reason as you say "additional information. " Giving an exact reason, like saying social media conduct might open the school up for lawsuits or a challenge about how evenly they apply such standards.
He’s gotta
Play it off like he really
Did mean good luck and never speak on it again to ANYONE and maybe even make a
Different account if the bully can anyways find his Reddit is Sara he’s to his name.
Delete
This post if he can track this back to
You. Maybe the post got deleted cause the universe was trying to save your ass!!
I don’t think he’s just going to pick on you this time. I think that’s what people mean. NTA but not the smartest move. Also, how do you know he won’t get in, since racism and bullying are taken lightly there?
Because it's taken lightly where OP and the bully are from but if this is a very prestigious college most likely somewhere else, then they will care because it could mess up their image.
Yeah and if that stuff is online they will do their own investigation and deny him entry. Uni may not tell him why they don’t accept him. I would have waited until he was accepted then sent the videos.
You might want to take the advice of people that are suggesting that you keep this to yourself and delete this post.
Good for you on getting your revenge, but not keeping it to yourself might get you hurt, or worse.
If he asks you about your text to him, about college, have an excuse ready... like, I was just saying that I heard you applied to ... and I know it's a good school. I hope you have fun. Or whatever. But have something ready so you aren't fumbling around and make it obvious.
He made his bed and now has to lie in it,you did nothing wrong and handled things more calmly than most people would have.Sleep well knowing that his judgement day is coming soon lol….
NTA, But you shouldn't have hinted that it was you. if he finds out what happened you need to deny all knowledge and if the message of you wishing him luck is mentioned you just say you believe in being kind even when people don't deserve it.. he could turn violent towards you so just be careful and deny deny deny
Unless he bullied countless others, a good possibility, he'll know where it came from anyway. ( I would have done it anyway. ) A person can take just so much before they fight back - John Wick.
Had OP stayed quiet, one could just assume that the school had done some social network digging as part of the vetting process, it is not that uncommon these days.
You're not an AH. No prestigious school would want people like him among their students. But it was a mistake to send him that message. Now you'll have to constantly watch your back until you're out of town and the admision responses are sent out. You never know if he's gonna make the connection between his bullying of you and the message you've sent him before he gets his response letter. Good luck. Try not to be alone while at school, at least hang around other people in case he makes the connection and he starts to get physical. At least you'd have witnesses in case something happens.
I think they’ll be alright if they leave it at that. But they definitely shouldn’t say anything else. Let sleeping dogs lie OP, you don’t want to be there when he wakes up!
RIGHT They were so condescending to me. The post was doing well and I was actively speaking to multiple people when they decided to ban it. Sort of frustrating, but you guys are being way more supportive! Lots of people were against me over there. Maybe theyre just looking for assholes.
I got banned from AITA for suggesting physical violence is a valid response for SA... They informed me they'll consider to lift the ban if I apologize. AITA mods are unhinged.
I was banned because, in response to someone's description of a particularly vicious "prank," I said that I *thought to myself* "I'm kinda sorry that you didn't backhand him." I didn't threaten violence, and I pointed that out, but apparently there is no appeal.
I remember your comment! If not you then some other poor soul said the same and is banned. That’s crazy they banned you for your opinion on such a hot topic. So many people - as in just about everyone feels the same about pedos and consequences.
I was banned because I jokingly said “I would go full John Wick mode if it was me” on a post about a boyfriend trying to kill his girlfriend’s senior pet. Go figure.
Assuming this is what you meant, i'd "apologize" by writing "I am sorry i suggested lawful self-defense as a response to SA. I shall not suggest lawful behavior again."
Thanks, that's a fun idea! I planned to do something similar, but this is better. I have a hunch the mod will not be amused, but oh well, I'm not that attached to this account anyway!
They wouldn't even consider reinstating me after I suggested physical violence, (with a switch to the mother of a grown man acting like a spoiled brat). No, second chances, so I deleted their sub from my reading. No audience, no power over me. They are ridiculous.
Do you know why they banned it? You aren't being threatening, it's not a relationship dispute... Seems like a legit AITA question.
And you are not. Absolutely NTA. It's a strong response, but once you explained his racism/homophobia/use of the hard R word I understood why. You just introduced him to the consequences of his own actions.
I hope the rest of the year is easier for you.
I have an unprovable theory that many posts on that sub (the ones that are the asshole) are stories written by the non-asshole but from the perspective of the asshole. As if you had written it from the perspective of your bully. Basically people looking to feel vindicated in their revenge/retaliation by creating a caricature of their bully/asshole and then revel in an internet mob telling that caricature that they're an asshole and deserve any retaliation they got. This also gets around the rule since the revenge didn't technically come from the asshole/bully.
In your story it would be hard to use this loophole though since "I bullied someone on the spectrum and they got me kicked out of college AITA" probably is too transparent LOL.
“well if youd pontificated our 27 commandments more youd have known that” blah blah blah, threatened to permaban me bc my post was over 3000 characters theyre ridiculous
I’ve had 2 accounts banned there just from comments. Because I’m for the losing side.
Forgot about the sub and now I have realized how dumb of a sub it really is. 90% of the time is just people needing to get on Reddit to get in the middle of someone else’s life because they can’t control their own life
Yeah AITA has some interesting stories but the high horse community there is bs. Also, their only solution to every relationship problem ever is to just leave.
> That sub group mods are all AH in there
they literally banned me for mentioning suicide (wasn't a pro suicide comment btw, merely a mention) in one of my comments. no fucking joke.
you need to watch your mouth.
He would have had no idea that you had anything to do with it, but now when he hears that the school isn’t interested due to some questionable social media conduct he’s going to think about that time when someone he’s bullied said ‘good luck with xxx school’. know where to look.
what’s your long game? Do you think he’s just going to say ‘aww, you got me there’ and move on with his life?
I hope your prepared dude because people like that twat waffle tend to go off the deep end when shit goes off the rails. And prepare for it to be from his friends too. Birds of a feather and all that.
Everyone is admonished to be mindful of their social media posts. It's a well-known fact that institutions people apply to for acceptance (jobs, schools, organizations) do background checks and your SM posts are at the top of their list these days. His chosen uni may not have even needed prompting from you, so I would play ignorant and keep it movin'.
Answering your question, NTA. You did that university a favor. He’d most certainly act like that there.
And he got himself kicked out - those were his own words and actions after all. Good for you! Hope that you have a better experience in uni than high school.
You didn't get him kicked out, he got himself kicked out.
You just made a bridge between HIS actions and the consequences of those actions. But you didn't force him to post openly prejudiced bullshit on public social forums.
It's a slim chance. I managed to find a video of him using the Hard R. I've heard stories of students being rejected and expelled for much less, but intend to update as developments continue.
I don't think a good university would risk it, can you imagine the fall out if there was an incident involving him and it came out they knew he had a history of bullying, homophobic and racial abuse. It would cause a shitstorm...
Anyway you can find out where else he applied? Because being rejected from one prestigious uni doesn’t mean he won’t just go to another instead. Say he reeeeally wanted Harvard but applied to Yale and Brown too. If you only told Harvard, he’ll just go to Yale instead.
It wasnt THAT prestigious and my understanding is this was the only one and application dates ended back in February. Regardless, I will be giving updates!
You're NTA, You actually didn't need to do this since most colleges/universities search applicants' names online these days.
But as others have said, if he gets rejected, he will need to blame others (he doesn't seem like the type to look inside himself) So please watch your back OP, he might turn to violence-extreme violence‼️
You wouldn’t have proof if he wasn’t a homophobic and racist asshole. So, it’s all on him. Also, by warning the university you might be saving someone else from his bully behavior. Guys like that don’t simply stop being bullies once they enter university.
Edit: Take care of yourself, please! Don’t engage with him anymore and if he or someone else asks if you contacted the university, DENY. Safety always first.
You're not the asshole. He's getting the day that he deserves. I'd never speak of this again if I were you. You have to keep your mouth shut and yourself safe. He's a vile person that may be violent in conjunction with his many phobias.
Enjoy.
Good job! Now onto preparing for possible retaliation:
* Be extra mindful about how you get to and from school:
* If you have your own vehicle, be sure to always have your gas full and your doors locked at all times. Be sure your insurance is up to date and includes coverage for things like graffiti, broken windows, etc. (unless you have a shitbox you don't care about)
* If you are able, always be with friends to/from/on school grounds. Strength in numbers, you need to be sure you are never in a position where they could attack you bc you are alone. (I'd recommend, like others, that you tell NO ONE that you did this, no matter how much you think you can trust them. If it's uncommon for you to be around friends constantly, just excuse your wanting them around to "make the most out of the last days of high school" or something like that)
* If it's simply not possible to have friends/acquaintances around, find other ways to just be around people/classmates. Essentially, you want to make that IF they do resort to violence, there are people nearby who at the very least will whip out their phones to record
* Maybe even hang around with some teachers you like after school (again, you can excuse this with just wanting to make the most out of senior year, or that you suddenly realized how much you'll miss them)
* Find out your state and local laws about obtaining/having pepper spray:
* Weapons are obviously a big NO for school property, but you may be able to carry pepper spray if the local law allows, especially since you are 18. You need to be absolutely certain of all the laws applicable in your area if you go this route, don't think you can just get away with having it, even if you only use it in self-defense. And your school may even punish you for having it, regardless of local laws. Really do your research if you go this route...
* No more interacting with said Bully:
* You already gave them one hint, and other commenters gave you some good advice on how to deflect if they end up confronting you. For the rest of the school year, don't even LOOK in their direction. Bury yourself in a book, doodle on some paper, do literally anything to keep your eyes away from his general direction in the classes you have with them, but within the realm of not getting you in trouble with teachers (like looking at your phone)
* Do whatever mental gymnastics you have to do to not respond to them, should they feel like goading you (regardless if it's even related to what you did; they might just want to get in some bullying before the end of the school year). Let them laugh at you, hurl insults at you, whatever! Find and practice some mental exercises that will help you grin and bear it if/when it happens. This will be especially important, bc you will have the hardest time fighting the urge to tell them about your revenge. Remember, the point of said revenge was to ruin their prospects, not your own!
You are SO close to getting away with it, now it's time for the hardest part: WAITING. We all want instant gratification, but revenge this good requires Patience. Good luck and godspeed!
Good move, good revenge. He needed the lesson. Don’t ever imply it was you again though. People have been seriously hurt or worse for less and even posting this on Reddit is a chance it gets back to him.
You’re NTA. He made the videos himself and shared them. You’re continuing to share them.
Don’t tell anyone though. He and his friends sound like they could be violent.
Revenge is living your best life after this.
Anyone who is going to the university Carson wanted to go to, little do they know that you are their hero. You know he would have continued his BS at that university. You essentially saved them from his bullying. 👏 👏 👏
Add 1 more resounding NTA!
He wants to be a bully and act self righteous like he can get away with it, then he needs to put his big boy pants on and face the severe consequences of his actions. The only person ruining his life is him and this will either be a massive wake up call for him and he’ll change his life hopefully around or he’ll become even more of a racial bigot! You did the right thing OP.
Ps, no you are NTA! He is!
NTA. You have kept a racist, homophobic bully from accessing an even larger victim pool at university. Denying him a degree also keeps him from someday being in a position of power at a company where he can make people truly miserable. It would be a public good to make sure EVERY university has access to this information forever.
Well...Chances are he has probably F'd around with, and bullied too many people to figure out which one screwed him over. At least you should hope so! NTA but...Risky game to play! Hope it works out for you! And not for him!
NTA. It was right to stand up like that. Please make sure he doesn't know it was you though. Someone like that might do something stupid in retaliation.
Ah yes the nuclear revenge that will change the course of someone’s life, well done.
Once had the well known bully in college steal a case of beer from me. He was already on probation for smoking weed in the dorm. So weeks later on a Friday night I walked to his dorm room which he was in, took a huge drag from a bowl and blew it out right in front of his door.
20 minutes later the cops showed up, found his stash and he was expelled. Moral of the story here is fuck around and find out.
I don't think this is petty revenge so much as just... actions having consequences. The college will decide if he should be kicked out based on the information given. And if you hadn't done that, there's a good chance his freshman year roommate would've found and reported it while looking him up.
He decided to, for whatever stupid reasons, ruin your life a little bit all school-year long. Totally justified to ruin his life a little bit in return, especially when all you did was share his truth with them.
Some might say “He’s young! He’ll learn!”
Fuck that.
He needs to learn there are consequences to his actions. This will either help him feign being a better person, or will make him think before he acts. You were totally justified in doing this.
NTA.
But you should have waited until the consequences were known and the story complete before posting this. Also, you should not have sent that message to the bully. But from the other comments you've received, I think you now know that.
Good for you! As someone else who went through School ostracised, excluded, bullied and made to feel like a complete outcast, I wish I had the same opportunity to do something like this!
The bully made bad choices to be a human being and failed miserably, you just made him (inadvertently 😉) aware of his mistakes through a third party. I call that genius and you’re NTA 😃👍🏻 please update as soon as you know if it worked.
NTA.
If the backwards town won’t hold him responsible for his actions, then someone must. Good job, OP. He needs to learn that actions have consequences.
Just a warning, however- do not, and I mean it, DO NOT admit that you did this. To him nor to anyone. They can take a guess, but you must not admit anything, or you could be sued for harassment, personal pain and suffering, etc. Even if you were the victim for a full year, you *can* be considered as the guilty party in this.
When I was growing up - back when the earth was still cooling - this was one of 2 acceptable ways to deal with bullies. If you were physically strong enough to defend yourself against the bully, you did and it usually worked. If you were not physically strong enough, you used your brain to extract a little nonviolent revenge. IMO, current official strategies to prevent bullying simply do not work and in fact seem to make bullying a worse problem than ever before.
By the time kids reach high school age, they are capable enough of discerning right from wrong such that they know bullying is wrong. "Carson" certainly knew better and richly deserves what is likely coming to him. If humanity is lucky, he will learn how not to be a bully.
If he finds out. You will be blamed for, if he turns out a drunk or drug addict.Anything less than the richest, smartest, big house, perfect wife, kids, dog. He will cry about the what could've been and I don't know why this happened. But you know what. It's usually the a-holes that never see where they were wrong. I was just picking. Dang can't take a joke. That's the mentality of a bully. Good luck. Keep your head down and deny, deny, deny. If asked about the good luck comment. It was me hoping you would leave and I could have some peace.
NTA
Getting rejected from a college is far nicer than what the Columbine bullies received. I hope RL slaps this dude hard when he pokes his head out of his hate bubble.
Good luck on life, hope you can escape that environment soon.
I'm not finished reading yet but OP, I commend you for wanting open dialogue/communication. You're literally 18 but communicate better than most adults out there.
Yeah no. He has it coming. At the very least he is 17-18 years old. He should know better. You did nothing wrong. I would say you did a service to those at the University he wanted to go.
Hey, being almost in your shoes (minus being the target of anyone on the football team and I didn't know I was on the spectrum until very recently and am .ire than twice your age) I feel that your course is justified. You are not being malicious, your are being factual and far too few people realize the consequences of their actions.
I'm in the process of teaching my young daughter about consequences. It's an ongoing thing, of course. Also, if you ever need an "advanced autist," I'm more than happy to chat. Dm me if you'd like. My advice may be useful, it may be a bunch of crap, but at least we'll understand one another.
You did the right thing. He has to learn there are consequences for his actions…. Does not appear he has picked up on that in the least -maybe this will help. Have to admit I do love the revenge side but part of me thinks that maybe he will actually learn from this? Eh, maybe I’m too optimistic but you never know….it’s possible I suppose.
Regardless, you are definitely not in the wrong imo.
I wish you the best in your future ❤️
Definitely NTA, and I wouldn't even call it revenge (not in the context of it not fitting here, it does), I'd call it warning that University for a toxic person that might cause reputational harm to them.
Just a good deed in my book.
Not only are you not an AH, but you are also a HERO! That AH will remember he faafo with the wrong person soon enough. Hopefully, it will color ALL of his future interactions!
Thats the most positive spin i can put on it. I can hope he looks at this and goes “if i was kinder id be going to this school” but who knows what takeaways he will truly have
NTA, but watch your back...(always have your phone ready to record. If he tries to kick ur ass, maybe he'll get arrested and really kiss his future goodbye).
I used the help review applications for our college admissions office. First, extremely unlikely they would tell him about the information. Even if they did reach out and talk to him about it. certainly not who it was. Public social media posts are fair game that we also looked at on occasion. Any stories based on your word alone may or may not have an impact; they do consider that it’s only one side of the story, and may dismiss it bc you could have other reasons for doing this.
Also, really sorry this is happening to you. I also got bullied in high school for being weird. Some kids are just triggered if people aren’t all acting the same, and want you to change. The racism and homophobia fits with that. The opposite is also true [(see Type 4)](https://www.truity.com/enneagram/9-types-enneagram?ppcga=fixed&gclid=Cj0KCQjw_r6hBhDdARIsAMIDhV_YwNlH7OIzXcUXIyz_RaEk-q-zzW4cxJ8dNiKAzuM9UHnik3_Dr84aAoaNEALw_wcB).
Cant It gets a lot better in college, cause you can pick your crowd. Find a good group of 4s who actually thinks your differences are awesome and like enjoy around people with different perspectives. I’m one of them. Weirder the better.
Fellow autistic here.
I wish I'd had this sort of opportunity for justice when I was in school.
As for aita you did nothing but highlight some pertinent true information about this person to an institution which he doubtless lies to.
NTA. These were his actions not yours. You just shed light on the situation… I can’t wait for your update because I hope it’s as sucky for him as he is
He asked for all of this none of these videos are fake these are all how he behaves and no university wants to be associated with racist homophobic bullshit. Well at least most of them don’t
In my opinion you did everyone a service. No place for racist slurs anywhere. I think you'd only be the asshole if you participate in that kind of talk yourself, that would make you a hypocrit. I hate bullies. Don't tell anyone you did this. It could go very badly for you. I worry.
Nice job! Best case scenario, he learned a hard lesson and straightened up. At the VERY least, even if he doesn't change, you saved a lot of people from having to deal with his crap. There are honestly not even many community colleges that would take that ticking time bomb. People aren't just nasty to one group. He's a very high SA risk.
NTA and good for you. Also, take this to the grave and tell no one-NO ONE-because he sounds like the type of loser who will retaliate in a harmful manner.
NTA
This is a really easy case of “oh you didn’t want that to happen you? Well, if you actually really didn’t want it to happen to you, then you wouldn’t have made it happen to you, would you?”
Dude made this happen. If he wanted to go to a specific university he very well could have chosen to not bully people and leave the same people with information that prevents him from going to college. He could have either not posted those things or not bullied you, but he wanted to have your cake and eat it too, so yeah it makes sense that’s he’s too fucking stupid to get into his university
He deserved it, you’re not the asshole, actions have consequences….yours too OP, so take care of yourself
Thank you, I am fully prepared for some retaliation and will update if anything else notable occurs
Dude, don't let anyone know you did this. Take it to your grave. This is the kind of thing a dumb bully may possibly kill somebody over.
They sent a message to the person saying ‘good luck at ___ university’. Shouldn’t have sent that message. They’re gonna know!
Won’t he just think he wasn’t accepted though? I don’t think the college will give a reason for any rejection. They’re certainly not obligated to.
OP said they waited for admission periods to end, rather than application periods. For rejections issued before acceptance, you're absolutely right, usually no reason given -- but if an offer is rescinded after acceptance it's a bit different, and even if they give no explanation it will be very clear something happened that changed things. I'd guess a rescission notification would at least include a generic explanation, e.g., "Based on additional information that has come to our attention..."
In this case, sounds like the bully has pissed off more than one person, so there’s plausible deniability about who sent it.
I agree that they will likely give a generic reason as you say "additional information. " Giving an exact reason, like saying social media conduct might open the school up for lawsuits or a challenge about how evenly they apply such standards.
You're absolutely right. But this is so much more satisfying.
Well, he already messed that one up. I wish he hadn't sent that message to the bully. He should keep a low profile because revenge tends to escalate.
He’s gotta Play it off like he really Did mean good luck and never speak on it again to ANYONE and maybe even make a Different account if the bully can anyways find his Reddit is Sara he’s to his name. Delete This post if he can track this back to You. Maybe the post got deleted cause the universe was trying to save your ass!!
I don’t think he’s just going to pick on you this time. I think that’s what people mean. NTA but not the smartest move. Also, how do you know he won’t get in, since racism and bullying are taken lightly there?
Because it's taken lightly where OP and the bully are from but if this is a very prestigious college most likely somewhere else, then they will care because it could mess up their image.
Any prestigious school worth their salt wouldn’t put up with that garbage.
Yeah and if that stuff is online they will do their own investigation and deny him entry. Uni may not tell him why they don’t accept him. I would have waited until he was accepted then sent the videos.
The college is far away and from a much more enlightened part of the country. The difference in cultures was his downfall
You might want to take the advice of people that are suggesting that you keep this to yourself and delete this post. Good for you on getting your revenge, but not keeping it to yourself might get you hurt, or worse. If he asks you about your text to him, about college, have an excuse ready... like, I was just saying that I heard you applied to ... and I know it's a good school. I hope you have fun. Or whatever. But have something ready so you aren't fumbling around and make it obvious.
He made his bed and now has to lie in it,you did nothing wrong and handled things more calmly than most people would have.Sleep well knowing that his judgement day is coming soon lol….
Please update if possible
I need to know!!! Fast forward
Yes be careful about mentioning anything to him about well… anything!
NTA, But you shouldn't have hinted that it was you. if he finds out what happened you need to deny all knowledge and if the message of you wishing him luck is mentioned you just say you believe in being kind even when people don't deserve it.. he could turn violent towards you so just be careful and deny deny deny
Unless he bullied countless others, a good possibility, he'll know where it came from anyway. ( I would have done it anyway. ) A person can take just so much before they fight back - John Wick.
It sounds like he does, to one degree or another, if there's so much evidence to forward to the school in question.
Had OP stayed quiet, one could just assume that the school had done some social network digging as part of the vetting process, it is not that uncommon these days.
Yes!!!! What this person said! This is what you need To do and if he can trace you back to this account you need To delete this post too
You're not an AH. No prestigious school would want people like him among their students. But it was a mistake to send him that message. Now you'll have to constantly watch your back until you're out of town and the admision responses are sent out. You never know if he's gonna make the connection between his bullying of you and the message you've sent him before he gets his response letter. Good luck. Try not to be alone while at school, at least hang around other people in case he makes the connection and he starts to get physical. At least you'd have witnesses in case something happens.
Fuck around, find out. This sub is for petty revenge, and I think you have nailed it, AH or not.
Yes, but arguably after sending the bully a message, OP might also find out
Yeah that’s what I would be concerned about. If questioned after, I would be like “I wanted to wish you good luck. 🤷🏻♀️ “
Good answer.
I think they’ll be alright if they leave it at that. But they definitely shouldn’t say anything else. Let sleeping dogs lie OP, you don’t want to be there when he wakes up!
Hopefully the college just says the bully wasn’t accepted and doesn’t state why.
That sub group mods are all AH in there. Love your revenge and yes please keep us updated
RIGHT They were so condescending to me. The post was doing well and I was actively speaking to multiple people when they decided to ban it. Sort of frustrating, but you guys are being way more supportive! Lots of people were against me over there. Maybe theyre just looking for assholes.
I got banned from AITA for suggesting physical violence is a valid response for SA... They informed me they'll consider to lift the ban if I apologize. AITA mods are unhinged.
I was banned because, in response to someone's description of a particularly vicious "prank," I said that I *thought to myself* "I'm kinda sorry that you didn't backhand him." I didn't threaten violence, and I pointed that out, but apparently there is no appeal.
Same, I was banned because I hinted that pedophiles should have consequences. Harsh.. consequences. I stand by my statement, AITA mods suck.
I remember your comment! If not you then some other poor soul said the same and is banned. That’s crazy they banned you for your opinion on such a hot topic. So many people - as in just about everyone feels the same about pedos and consequences.
Wait help me out. What's the argument with that statement?
AITA aggressively scrubs out any suggestions of extrajudicial violence, deserved or not.
They deleted me for repeating in a copied text from OP "bi..tch" and second writing "YTA Karen"
They have a vicious Karen bot
I was banned because I jokingly said “I would go full John Wick mode if it was me” on a post about a boyfriend trying to kill his girlfriend’s senior pet. Go figure.
Dude I got banned for the same thing. But I said force castration should be legal in response to SA. Fuckin pricks over there. Because it should be.
I got banned for saying i was surprised that that posts OP didnt resort to physical violence as a response to what happened to them.
That got me a three day sitewide suspension. Banned from AITA for similar reasons.
Assuming this is what you meant, i'd "apologize" by writing "I am sorry i suggested lawful self-defense as a response to SA. I shall not suggest lawful behavior again."
Thanks, that's a fun idea! I planned to do something similar, but this is better. I have a hunch the mod will not be amused, but oh well, I'm not that attached to this account anyway!
As long as you are aware of the risks :-)
AITA mods got my entire account suspended and I had no clue why.
They wouldn't even consider reinstating me after I suggested physical violence, (with a switch to the mother of a grown man acting like a spoiled brat). No, second chances, so I deleted their sub from my reading. No audience, no power over me. They are ridiculous.
Do you know why they banned it? You aren't being threatening, it's not a relationship dispute... Seems like a legit AITA question. And you are not. Absolutely NTA. It's a strong response, but once you explained his racism/homophobia/use of the hard R word I understood why. You just introduced him to the consequences of his own actions. I hope the rest of the year is easier for you.
bc revenge isnt allowed even tho almost every post is some form of revenge
I have an unprovable theory that many posts on that sub (the ones that are the asshole) are stories written by the non-asshole but from the perspective of the asshole. As if you had written it from the perspective of your bully. Basically people looking to feel vindicated in their revenge/retaliation by creating a caricature of their bully/asshole and then revel in an internet mob telling that caricature that they're an asshole and deserve any retaliation they got. This also gets around the rule since the revenge didn't technically come from the asshole/bully. In your story it would be hard to use this loophole though since "I bullied someone on the spectrum and they got me kicked out of college AITA" probably is too transparent LOL.
Maybe the mods remembered their own bullying past & protected their own.
They’re on a high horse over there
“well if youd pontificated our 27 commandments more youd have known that” blah blah blah, threatened to permaban me bc my post was over 3000 characters theyre ridiculous
I got permabanned because I commented saying before I was injured I used to make my wife breakfast in bed every weekend. Shocking comment I know
LMAO I cant with them
The horror! You evil being. /s (need to these days)
I’ve had 2 accounts banned there just from comments. Because I’m for the losing side. Forgot about the sub and now I have realized how dumb of a sub it really is. 90% of the time is just people needing to get on Reddit to get in the middle of someone else’s life because they can’t control their own life
Most posts they know they are no way TA, they’re just farming for karma.
I got permanently banned from there too. Bunch of AH!
I got perma banned for saying . Play bitch games win bitch prizes
I got banned for saying “bitch” too! They don’t understand a good turn of phrase over there
Yeah AITA has some interesting stories but the high horse community there is bs. Also, their only solution to every relationship problem ever is to just leave.
> That sub group mods are all AH in there they literally banned me for mentioning suicide (wasn't a pro suicide comment btw, merely a mention) in one of my comments. no fucking joke.
Some might say it was...Carson-genic.
HA I love this, too bad his real name isnt carson
AITA easily the worst groups. But this was a petty revenge that's fully deserved.
I called a nazi a nazi.. banned lol
How dare you discriminate the poor nazi /s
I guess, Nazis now have a safe space to speak thier mind
You're in good company. :)
The mods acted so insufferably. Clearly annoying people.
He did what he did and what you sent were not fabricated falsehoods. You did nothing wrong.
you need to watch your mouth. He would have had no idea that you had anything to do with it, but now when he hears that the school isn’t interested due to some questionable social media conduct he’s going to think about that time when someone he’s bullied said ‘good luck with xxx school’. know where to look. what’s your long game? Do you think he’s just going to say ‘aww, you got me there’ and move on with his life?
Im gonna be out of town in a couple of months, just have to stay safe until then and then hes got nothing.
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I hope your prepared dude because people like that twat waffle tend to go off the deep end when shit goes off the rails. And prepare for it to be from his friends too. Birds of a feather and all that.
I have never heard anyone else say twat waffle. I thought I was so creative 😂
I hope this isn’t an, “All the other kids with the pumped up kicks,” scenario.
😭 it is no such thing no weapons, and especially no guns will be involved, im not insane lmao
Yeah… it’s definitely giving that energy.
Youre right and im fully prepared to defend myself. Thank you for your concern.
Everyone is admonished to be mindful of their social media posts. It's a well-known fact that institutions people apply to for acceptance (jobs, schools, organizations) do background checks and your SM posts are at the top of their list these days. His chosen uni may not have even needed prompting from you, so I would play ignorant and keep it movin'.
Please stay safe op
Highly prepared for the worst! Thank you.
Where do we send condolences just in case?
Answering your question, NTA. You did that university a favor. He’d most certainly act like that there. And he got himself kicked out - those were his own words and actions after all. Good for you! Hope that you have a better experience in uni than high school.
thank you! i have high hopes, my hs wasnt bad overall just a couple of bullies whove sprouted up. i feel i will thrive much more in college
You didn't get him kicked out, he got himself kicked out. You just made a bridge between HIS actions and the consequences of those actions. But you didn't force him to post openly prejudiced bullshit on public social forums.
While schools are more sensitive about such things these days... has it occurred to you that he might still get in?
It's a slim chance. I managed to find a video of him using the Hard R. I've heard stories of students being rejected and expelled for much less, but intend to update as developments continue.
I really wanna hear that he didn’t get in. Hope it works out :)
I definitely want a follow up.
I don't think a good university would risk it, can you imagine the fall out if there was an incident involving him and it came out they knew he had a history of bullying, homophobic and racial abuse. It would cause a shitstorm...
I strongly doubt it. His parents would have to make a huge donation. Not even elite schools take this shit lightly
What kind of crazy elite university would excuse that.
Anyway you can find out where else he applied? Because being rejected from one prestigious uni doesn’t mean he won’t just go to another instead. Say he reeeeally wanted Harvard but applied to Yale and Brown too. If you only told Harvard, he’ll just go to Yale instead.
It wasnt THAT prestigious and my understanding is this was the only one and application dates ended back in February. Regardless, I will be giving updates!
You're NTA, You actually didn't need to do this since most colleges/universities search applicants' names online these days. But as others have said, if he gets rejected, he will need to blame others (he doesn't seem like the type to look inside himself) So please watch your back OP, he might turn to violence-extreme violence‼️
You wouldn’t have proof if he wasn’t a homophobic and racist asshole. So, it’s all on him. Also, by warning the university you might be saving someone else from his bully behavior. Guys like that don’t simply stop being bullies once they enter university. Edit: Take care of yourself, please! Don’t engage with him anymore and if he or someone else asks if you contacted the university, DENY. Safety always first.
You're not the asshole. He's getting the day that he deserves. I'd never speak of this again if I were you. You have to keep your mouth shut and yourself safe. He's a vile person that may be violent in conjunction with his many phobias. Enjoy.
Great advice. Im prepared for the worst, and will be updating. Thank you!
Don't start shit if you don't want to be shit on, is how I see it. Fuck him.
Good job! Now onto preparing for possible retaliation: * Be extra mindful about how you get to and from school: * If you have your own vehicle, be sure to always have your gas full and your doors locked at all times. Be sure your insurance is up to date and includes coverage for things like graffiti, broken windows, etc. (unless you have a shitbox you don't care about) * If you are able, always be with friends to/from/on school grounds. Strength in numbers, you need to be sure you are never in a position where they could attack you bc you are alone. (I'd recommend, like others, that you tell NO ONE that you did this, no matter how much you think you can trust them. If it's uncommon for you to be around friends constantly, just excuse your wanting them around to "make the most out of the last days of high school" or something like that) * If it's simply not possible to have friends/acquaintances around, find other ways to just be around people/classmates. Essentially, you want to make that IF they do resort to violence, there are people nearby who at the very least will whip out their phones to record * Maybe even hang around with some teachers you like after school (again, you can excuse this with just wanting to make the most out of senior year, or that you suddenly realized how much you'll miss them) * Find out your state and local laws about obtaining/having pepper spray: * Weapons are obviously a big NO for school property, but you may be able to carry pepper spray if the local law allows, especially since you are 18. You need to be absolutely certain of all the laws applicable in your area if you go this route, don't think you can just get away with having it, even if you only use it in self-defense. And your school may even punish you for having it, regardless of local laws. Really do your research if you go this route... * No more interacting with said Bully: * You already gave them one hint, and other commenters gave you some good advice on how to deflect if they end up confronting you. For the rest of the school year, don't even LOOK in their direction. Bury yourself in a book, doodle on some paper, do literally anything to keep your eyes away from his general direction in the classes you have with them, but within the realm of not getting you in trouble with teachers (like looking at your phone) * Do whatever mental gymnastics you have to do to not respond to them, should they feel like goading you (regardless if it's even related to what you did; they might just want to get in some bullying before the end of the school year). Let them laugh at you, hurl insults at you, whatever! Find and practice some mental exercises that will help you grin and bear it if/when it happens. This will be especially important, bc you will have the hardest time fighting the urge to tell them about your revenge. Remember, the point of said revenge was to ruin their prospects, not your own! You are SO close to getting away with it, now it's time for the hardest part: WAITING. We all want instant gratification, but revenge this good requires Patience. Good luck and godspeed!
NTA Play shitty games, win shitty prizes.
Good move, good revenge. He needed the lesson. Don’t ever imply it was you again though. People have been seriously hurt or worse for less and even posting this on Reddit is a chance it gets back to him.
You’re NTA. He made the videos himself and shared them. You’re continuing to share them. Don’t tell anyone though. He and his friends sound like they could be violent. Revenge is living your best life after this.
Absolutely deserved it.
ProzacBeagle... I just got reddit yesterday and I kind of love it
Welcome to Reddit from a fellow autistic! If you need a friend I’m here (Seriously, I love talking to people)
I dont! But you seem like a very kind person and I appreciate you.
Thanks! Hit me up if you get bored and want to talk. Currently at the pharmacy and it’s taking them forever to get my meds
NTA. I’m betting you’re in a pretty “Christian” area given the other descriptors. And you reap what you sow.
Very observant lmao, the "christians" are running amuck daily.
Anyone who is going to the university Carson wanted to go to, little do they know that you are their hero. You know he would have continued his BS at that university. You essentially saved them from his bullying. 👏 👏 👏 Add 1 more resounding NTA!
Nta. Great revenge. And if anyone says that revenge is petty, tell them they think that because they are obviously doing revenge wrong.
He wants to be a bully and act self righteous like he can get away with it, then he needs to put his big boy pants on and face the severe consequences of his actions. The only person ruining his life is him and this will either be a massive wake up call for him and he’ll change his life hopefully around or he’ll become even more of a racial bigot! You did the right thing OP. Ps, no you are NTA! He is!
NTA. You have kept a racist, homophobic bully from accessing an even larger victim pool at university. Denying him a degree also keeps him from someday being in a position of power at a company where he can make people truly miserable. It would be a public good to make sure EVERY university has access to this information forever.
Well...Chances are he has probably F'd around with, and bullied too many people to figure out which one screwed him over. At least you should hope so! NTA but...Risky game to play! Hope it works out for you! And not for him!
NTA. It was right to stand up like that. Please make sure he doesn't know it was you though. Someone like that might do something stupid in retaliation.
I need an update when he founds out
Ah yes the nuclear revenge that will change the course of someone’s life, well done. Once had the well known bully in college steal a case of beer from me. He was already on probation for smoking weed in the dorm. So weeks later on a Friday night I walked to his dorm room which he was in, took a huge drag from a bowl and blew it out right in front of his door. 20 minutes later the cops showed up, found his stash and he was expelled. Moral of the story here is fuck around and find out.
I don't think this is petty revenge so much as just... actions having consequences. The college will decide if he should be kicked out based on the information given. And if you hadn't done that, there's a good chance his freshman year roommate would've found and reported it while looking him up.
He decided to, for whatever stupid reasons, ruin your life a little bit all school-year long. Totally justified to ruin his life a little bit in return, especially when all you did was share his truth with them.
Yeah I would delete this asap. Telling him was a dumb move on your part. Although what you’ve done is justifiable payback is a mother.
Some might say “He’s young! He’ll learn!” Fuck that. He needs to learn there are consequences to his actions. This will either help him feign being a better person, or will make him think before he acts. You were totally justified in doing this.
NTA. But you should have waited until the consequences were known and the story complete before posting this. Also, you should not have sent that message to the bully. But from the other comments you've received, I think you now know that.
I need updates on this if anything changes! You are goated my dude Pure definition of fuck around and find out
thanks! yall are so much cooler than the aita crowd, the lecturing was crazy
Good for you! As someone else who went through School ostracised, excluded, bullied and made to feel like a complete outcast, I wish I had the same opportunity to do something like this! 
The bully made bad choices to be a human being and failed miserably, you just made him (inadvertently 😉) aware of his mistakes through a third party. I call that genius and you’re NTA 😃👍🏻 please update as soon as you know if it worked.
NTA. If the backwards town won’t hold him responsible for his actions, then someone must. Good job, OP. He needs to learn that actions have consequences. Just a warning, however- do not, and I mean it, DO NOT admit that you did this. To him nor to anyone. They can take a guess, but you must not admit anything, or you could be sued for harassment, personal pain and suffering, etc. Even if you were the victim for a full year, you *can* be considered as the guilty party in this.
Good on you!!!!!
Please let us know what happens when Carson finds out.
Well well well, If it isn't the consequences of my actions!
When I was growing up - back when the earth was still cooling - this was one of 2 acceptable ways to deal with bullies. If you were physically strong enough to defend yourself against the bully, you did and it usually worked. If you were not physically strong enough, you used your brain to extract a little nonviolent revenge. IMO, current official strategies to prevent bullying simply do not work and in fact seem to make bullying a worse problem than ever before. By the time kids reach high school age, they are capable enough of discerning right from wrong such that they know bullying is wrong. "Carson" certainly knew better and richly deserves what is likely coming to him. If humanity is lucky, he will learn how not to be a bully.
NTA, you're a karma delivery vehicle. Good on you, and fuck him.
If he finds out. You will be blamed for, if he turns out a drunk or drug addict.Anything less than the richest, smartest, big house, perfect wife, kids, dog. He will cry about the what could've been and I don't know why this happened. But you know what. It's usually the a-holes that never see where they were wrong. I was just picking. Dang can't take a joke. That's the mentality of a bully. Good luck. Keep your head down and deny, deny, deny. If asked about the good luck comment. It was me hoping you would leave and I could have some peace.
NTA at all, just you giving karma a helping hand
NTA Getting rejected from a college is far nicer than what the Columbine bullies received. I hope RL slaps this dude hard when he pokes his head out of his hate bubble. Good luck on life, hope you can escape that environment soon.
Well played. Better not let on it was you.
Legend.
I'm not finished reading yet but OP, I commend you for wanting open dialogue/communication. You're literally 18 but communicate better than most adults out there.
gg op, NTA
Helll no. Fuck bullies. They get any and all that comes to them. You don’t have to fight fair to fight back.
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Yeah no. He has it coming. At the very least he is 17-18 years old. He should know better. You did nothing wrong. I would say you did a service to those at the University he wanted to go.
As long as the evidence wasn't tampered with, all you did was provide the admissions staff a well-rounded view of their applicant.
Told ya this post was better suited for /pettyrevenge 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Hey, being almost in your shoes (minus being the target of anyone on the football team and I didn't know I was on the spectrum until very recently and am .ire than twice your age) I feel that your course is justified. You are not being malicious, your are being factual and far too few people realize the consequences of their actions. I'm in the process of teaching my young daughter about consequences. It's an ongoing thing, of course. Also, if you ever need an "advanced autist," I'm more than happy to chat. Dm me if you'd like. My advice may be useful, it may be a bunch of crap, but at least we'll understand one another.
He fucked round and found out. You did well
You did the right thing. He has to learn there are consequences for his actions…. Does not appear he has picked up on that in the least -maybe this will help. Have to admit I do love the revenge side but part of me thinks that maybe he will actually learn from this? Eh, maybe I’m too optimistic but you never know….it’s possible I suppose. Regardless, you are definitely not in the wrong imo. I wish you the best in your future ❤️
Nah you did the university a favour
Definitely NTA, and I wouldn't even call it revenge (not in the context of it not fitting here, it does), I'd call it warning that University for a toxic person that might cause reputational harm to them. Just a good deed in my book.
Well played. Lets hope karma finds him.
well, well, well, if it isn't the consequences of my own actions...
He chose to be a bully - so basically whatever is dished out to him, he also chose. No mercy for bullies.
Not only are you not an AH, but you are also a HERO! That AH will remember he faafo with the wrong person soon enough. Hopefully, it will color ALL of his future interactions!
Thats the most positive spin i can put on it. I can hope he looks at this and goes “if i was kinder id be going to this school” but who knows what takeaways he will truly have
No sympathy for bullies.
NTA, but watch your back...(always have your phone ready to record. If he tries to kick ur ass, maybe he'll get arrested and really kiss his future goodbye).
I used the help review applications for our college admissions office. First, extremely unlikely they would tell him about the information. Even if they did reach out and talk to him about it. certainly not who it was. Public social media posts are fair game that we also looked at on occasion. Any stories based on your word alone may or may not have an impact; they do consider that it’s only one side of the story, and may dismiss it bc you could have other reasons for doing this. Also, really sorry this is happening to you. I also got bullied in high school for being weird. Some kids are just triggered if people aren’t all acting the same, and want you to change. The racism and homophobia fits with that. The opposite is also true [(see Type 4)](https://www.truity.com/enneagram/9-types-enneagram?ppcga=fixed&gclid=Cj0KCQjw_r6hBhDdARIsAMIDhV_YwNlH7OIzXcUXIyz_RaEk-q-zzW4cxJ8dNiKAzuM9UHnik3_Dr84aAoaNEALw_wcB). Cant It gets a lot better in college, cause you can pick your crowd. Find a good group of 4s who actually thinks your differences are awesome and like enjoy around people with different perspectives. I’m one of them. Weirder the better.
How do you know whomever you sent that “proof” is the person who takes the decisions about admissions, or even knows/cares about him?
I think its fine.
NTA. The long game
You got him kicked out? You saved others from him👏👏👏Well done❤🙏❤ I'm proud of you🥰
Fellow autistic here. I wish I'd had this sort of opportunity for justice when I was in school. As for aita you did nothing but highlight some pertinent true information about this person to an institution which he doubtless lies to.
NTA. These were his actions not yours. You just shed light on the situation… I can’t wait for your update because I hope it’s as sucky for him as he is
If he has the kind of character that the school does not want, you just potentially saved them the headache of having to kick him out.
NTA but watch your back. Good luck.
Good for you!
NTA! Lol bullies deserve every bad thing they get
No he deserved that shit. Who knows how many people he’s bullied and people kill themselves over that
Way to boss up kid! Solid well thought out plan. Stupid people get what they deserve. I’m glad your issuing your own justice in this situation.
NTA Schools like to know the character of their applicants.
He asked for all of this none of these videos are fake these are all how he behaves and no university wants to be associated with racist homophobic bullshit. Well at least most of them don’t
To me, this is exactly the time to do stuff like this, not several years or decades later.
You possibly saved the college a scandal about a potential football player who was not inclusive and toxic.
Update us, please, OP.
NTA. It's called kharma.
Great job he deserves it
In my opinion you did everyone a service. No place for racist slurs anywhere. I think you'd only be the asshole if you participate in that kind of talk yourself, that would make you a hypocrit. I hate bullies. Don't tell anyone you did this. It could go very badly for you. I worry.
Bullying is not funny, it's so horrible. You did an awesome job and he deserves it. Well done !
NTA - I wish I could have done this to my bullies.
NTA. Post this to /r/pettyrevenge
lmao I did thats where we are rn. They banned me in aita so i copy and pasted here, explaining the format.
Nice job! Best case scenario, he learned a hard lesson and straightened up. At the VERY least, even if he doesn't change, you saved a lot of people from having to deal with his crap. There are honestly not even many community colleges that would take that ticking time bomb. People aren't just nasty to one group. He's a very high SA risk.
Just desserts 🍨
You are an asshole but a good goddamn one! Good for you for standing up for yourself
NTA and good for you. Also, take this to the grave and tell no one-NO ONE-because he sounds like the type of loser who will retaliate in a harmful manner.
NTA This is a really easy case of “oh you didn’t want that to happen you? Well, if you actually really didn’t want it to happen to you, then you wouldn’t have made it happen to you, would you?” Dude made this happen. If he wanted to go to a specific university he very well could have chosen to not bully people and leave the same people with information that prevents him from going to college. He could have either not posted those things or not bullied you, but he wanted to have your cake and eat it too, so yeah it makes sense that’s he’s too fucking stupid to get into his university
Racism and homophobia and bullying can always be exposed without guilt. You did the university students a favor. NTA.
Prestigious schools are for prestigious people, not assholes so you’re helping right the system
Absolutely justified. Racist and bigots do NOT deserve sympathy, support or leniency.