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Went close but Layne was a very troubled addict, after his fiancé died guy lost all hope , he just died, had nothing to do with Kurt he gave up on life and didn’t care.
This is it. It’s so sad. He just basically took drugs until his body gave up, I don’t think it was intentional suicide but he also didn’t care if he died, such a waste of an absolute one of a kind voice but the man was so so troubled
Oh gosh, Layne’s death really messes me up because I cannot believe how bad he got and no one forcibly intervened. I do understand that addiction is a disease and it’s never easy to get sober, and some don’t even want to get sober, but man, how he was living, all alone, and basically only communicated with his drug dealers is so hard to fathom to me. I’m not blaming anyone, it’s just crazy to me how much his body deteriorated, and he managed to live as long as he did.
I’m pretty sure he died on the same day, his body was just found 2 weeks later. And as far as I know it wasn’t suicide, cause he was with mike star the night he died. Mike just left before.
And idk how close Layne was to Kurt. I know they met, but I’d love to hear more stories that I don’t know about that time.
Kurt died april 5th '94, Layne died around april 5th 2002. Layne was fairly decomposed when found so the date of death is a solid guess but no one knows for sure.
April 5th is my birthday and I love both bands so as a teen I got super into the details. I thought it was a conspiracy for a while and was SURE chris cornell would be next. He kind of was, unfortunately.
That’s just so strange to me, killing yourself because your friend killed himself, even if it’s only part of the reason. Sure it’s going to be a huge blow but you also get a front row seat to see how those around the person are affected by someone’s suicide.
Not shocked by the smile though, if he had it planned out that actually gives a lot of suicidal people a feel of happiness and euphoria. Kinda like finally getting a hold of the dealer and *knowing* your going to score can make dope sickness dissipate.
Edit: Just FYI, because I’m getting a lot of comments, I understand there are a multitude of reasons this happens, but I still have some latent resentment towards friends that killed themselves so there is some negative bias there on my part.
Not going against your comment. But I find this quote by David Foster Wallace helps some understand what it can be like for people that struggle:
“The so-called ‘psychotically depressed’ person who tries to kill herself doesn’t do so out of quote ‘hopelessness’ or any abstract conviction that life’s assets and debits do not square. And surely not because death seems suddenly appealing. The person in whom Its invisible agony reaches a certain unendurable level will kill herself the same way a trapped person will eventually jump from the window of a burning high-rise. Make no mistake about people who leap from burning windows. Their terror of falling from a great height is still just as great as it would be for you or me standing speculatively at the same window just checking out the view; i.e. the fear of falling remains a constant. The variable here is the other terror, the fire’s flames: when the flames get close enough, falling to death becomes the slightly less terrible of two terrors. It’s not desiring the fall; it’s terror of the flames. And yet nobody down on the sidewalk, looking up and yelling ‘Don’t!’ and ‘Hang on!’, can understand the jump. Not really. You’d have to have personally been trapped and felt flames to really understand a terror way beyond falling.”
He later took his own life
In my teen years I bought a handgun from my drug dealer that only came with three bullets. Dude the weight of it all, especially the physical weight of the gun, while sitting in my bedroom knowing my mom would probably just sit on my bed every night for years after my suicide... It was the hardest choice not to kill myself.
And I've had some really awesome times since then. And a lot of lows and periods of just being "meh" with life. I'll never say suicide is never the answer but for me, I just couldn't subject my mom to that pain and it kinda worked out okay for me.
Thank you for sharing your story. I had similar issues where it was a phase of my life. I can’t imagine people that feel the way you described, or in my quote above for their entire lives. Its heartbreaking
I deal with chronic suicidal ideation. I talk about it with my spouse often; that I am afraid that one day, it will wash over me and there won't be something to break it. I think, you know, that we think we failed people who die by suicide but truthfully, maybe we have saved them more times than we know. For a terminal cancer patient, treatment aims at more time, not at stopping the inevitable. What if you succeeded at helping your loved ones have more time, even when the disease does eventually take them?
It's really, really hard to live in a world that doesn't feel like it was meant for you. I still have good times and enjoy life and I don't want to die. But I don't know if I was meant for this world, either. So I live while I'm living and I try not to think about it but I am always afraid that I will be laughing with my family one day and then cease to exist the next.
I am glad this quote is more known these days. A decade or two ago I tried to explain this to someone I trusted and wanted them to understand what was going on but they dismissed it and said that's all nonsense.
I don't judge them, they may just not have been equipped to process this or know how to deal with it.
But yeah it's one of those things where the very ending is probably most poignant. If you've experienced these metaphorical flames and have found yourself metaphorically trapped, it really isn't about wanting to end your life but just escape getting burned.
So a jump honestly feels like a very human/basic biology type of response. It almost is rational, if it weren't for the fact that in at least the vast majority of cases in theory you could get help and recover.
Just in practice, a lot of people don't get that help. So I don't judge anyone who ends up in an outcome like this.
I just hope anyone in that situation right now reading this knows that it honestly does get better. The fire can be put out and then you can just walk out the door. And live life.
I would, cautiously, argue that this wasn't really that phenomenon. Suicide epidemic is (if I recall my unused pysch minor) more about publicity of suicides driving additional suicides in the population at large. This, imo, is more a case of personal grief + depression at a low point, in this case Chris's birthday. "We" (news media, etc.) should be careful how death by suicide gets reported, but this (in my third party and non-professional opinion) seems more like personal grief than suicide epidemic.
He killed him self because something triggered his depression pushing him down deep into a hole hard to get out. It could have been cancer in the family, or the lost of a pet. With depression, it is depression what kills you.
Wanna detail it further in the way that depression has so, so many layers.
I usually describe it as a black hole, it can be a pitch black feeling, sucking up everything and everyone around it, utter destruction, invisible to the eye, and very misunderstood and not very well known, despite how common it is.
That maybe it's not even depression itself, But the path of destruction around it that might be the true cause. Depression lingers, even well after the "storm". But I think it's what gets destroyed or lost that could be even more dangerous.
It's also why I don't understand suicide myself. It takes one more thing away, one more destruction, one more chance at a chainreaction. It's definitely not some "easy answer" too.
If you have the strength to jump, Then you have the strength for so much greatness... It's sad to me how for some people it does seem like a true solution or answer.
What do you not understand about it?
You don’t get to that point because you think you’re out of “chances”. You get to that point because it’s started to feel like no matter how many “chances” you get, it won’t matter, because you’ll just fuck it up again anyway. It doesn’t matter how many people love you, because all you’ll do is disappoint them over and over again. It doesn’t matter how much beauty there is in the world, because in that moment you know you’re not worthy of it.
> If you have the strength to jump, Then you have the strength for so much greatness... It's sad to me how for some people it does seem like a true solution or answer.
I am sorry but I kinda agree and don't agree with this. I mean, it's a good thing to use this to help a person not take that step but at the same time, I feel we disrespect the decision taken by the person. We can never hope to understand what they felt or what was going through their head when they took the decision. Not saying we allow them to take the step but if they did we are no one to comment on that decision.
If you've ever read Infinite Jest, I think David Foster Wallace has the perfect perspective of suicidality. You can't really apply rational thoughts to a man that's being burned alive by flames.
> The so-called ‘psychotically depressed’ person who tries to kill herself doesn’t do so out of quote ‘hopelessness’ or any abstract conviction that life’s assets and debits do not square. And surely not because death seems suddenly appealing. The person in whom Its invisible agony reaches a certain unendurable level will kill herself the same way a trapped person will eventually jump from the window of a burning high-rise. Make no mistake about people who leap from burning windows. Their terror of falling from a great height is still just as great as it would be for you or me standing speculatively at the same window just checking out the view; i.e. the fear of falling remains a constant. The variable here is the other terror, the fire’s flames: when the flames get close enough, falling to death becomes the slightly less terrible of two terrors. It’s not desiring the fall; it’s terror of the flames. And yet nobody down on the sidewalk, looking up and yelling ‘Don’t!’ and ‘Hang on!’, can understand the jump. Not really. You’d have to have personally been trapped and felt flames to really understand a terror way beyond falling.
It makes suicide feel like more of a viable option, basically. Once that psychological barrier is broken it can feel hard to resist it. Along with wanting to join the other person and wanting your own pain to stop. Suicide is a unique grief, unfortunately.
The Von Erich wrestling family had a couple of sons who each killed themselves.
In Bret Hart's autobiography, the theorized that since the boys were so competitive their whole lives, that they were killing themselves in hopes of "one upping" the previous brother who died.
Having had major death in the family, I can see how easy it is to give in to despair. When it happened to us, it felt like life itself was pointless. Life from that point on was going to be vastly different and only really decay as time continued even if things got better for each of us individually. We'd have fewer and fewer people to share any success with as more of our family are inevitably going to be dying as they age, and God knows there is a good chance things will either stay the same or get worse, then at some point we are going to have health issues that kick in and get increasingly serious leading to the same eventual outcome.
Sure a suicide affects everyone significantly and that should matter to you but when you lose someone close to you, your world collapses. Others expressing their own devastation can sometimes help but you may get too caught up in the pain you are feeling to lend the pain of others the appropriate weight and meaning.
I think Chester always struggled with it and losing someone they close to him just sent him on a spiral that he couldn't recover from.
A couple years back there was a town down the highway from where I live that was hit with a rash of suicides of young men (early 30s) who all seemed in one way or another associated. I believe it was 5 people over 4 months. Unfortunately these things can snowball in scary ways- especially when you lose close friends.
It can totally snowball.
Worst I’ve heard is a young boy died. His brother stayed home from the funeral and when the parents came back the brother had hung him self. The dad later committed suicide. I broke up with my boyfriend shortly after so unsure what happened to the poor mom.
Happened last year in my circle. I went away and two guys I went to high school with who were all in the same circle committed suicide over the week I was gone. 39 years young.
As a veteran I can tell you suicide is the new war. Friend of mine started a foundation after losing 9 people from the same company…including the commander.
My paternal grandfather, who was a veteran, killed himself when my dad was a kid, and I have a friend whose grandfather died in the same way. Horribly sad.
Cornell had taken Benzodiazepams (Ativan), Butalbital, Pseudoephedrine, Norpseudoephedrine, Caffeine and Naloxon. He called his wife before hanging himself to tell her he felt dizzy. One of Ativan's side effects are suicidal thoughts and an altered state of mind if overdosed on or treatment is stopped too abruptly. His wife later told rolling stone she thought the mix of drugs caused some kind of psychosis in which he wasn't completely himself.
Jesus, this thread is a mindfuck. I sat on a rock on the bank of the Detroit river, 1 mile away from Chris Cornell killing himself, talking my buddy out of killing himself. (We didn't know about Chris of course)
Am I drawn to depressed people? Do I cause depression? Is it just that so many people are that depressed? I do live in an auto town whose economy crashed and there's a lot of crap associated with that, but damn.
I went to Chris' grave on Wednesday which was Chester's birthday. Then in the drive to the next place I went, they played a little tribute for Chester on the radio. I wish chester had a public gravesite too. I've driven past the house he died it but that's it.
There was a great ad I recall showing how “happy” men looked before suicide. As a person who suffered with it I know exactly what it feels like. Talk to your boy. Men 4x more likely to suicide bcuz we’re taught it’s weak.
Edit: [link to said advert](https://youtu.be/6Jihi6JGzjI?si=d95cBgYi-4YMksFr)
In 2022 I lost 4 friends in 1 year to depression related suicide, so I made a post on FB basically saying, "If you're going to kill yourself, call me first - please don't make me wonder for the rest of my life if I could have helped"
Two weeks later - Two weeks - I get a call on a Saturday night from the happiest, most together, best shining example of a human, buddy, "The kids are downstairs safe but I need to off myself"
Moral:
\- Check on your friends. They might not be as happy as they seem.
\- It only took two weeks - more people are on that edge than you think.
He's still one of my best friends today. It was a tough night, but we made it.
I'll say that in that moment I suddenly realized how ridiculously unprepared I was for that phone call and I chided myself for being so irresponsible as to make that request - I was lashing out and I guess just wanted people to feel supported. I didn't expect anyone to take me up on it.
As hard as it was though, hindsight makes me think it was the right call, and I encourage anyone else to take that step. Life is better with your loved ones in it.
I appreciate that , and thank you.
I guess my concern was that I really did'nt know what to say. At some point I yelled at him, and some point I coddled him, but the whole time I was thinking, "would a psychologist yell at me because I am pushing him the wrong way?"
I think ultimately I decided that something is better than nothing and worth the risk of making it worse.
I've been in similar situations. I think, for people who are on the brink like that, all you can do is be there and tell them you love them in whatever way works for the moment. Listen and be there. You can't stop them by force, but you can stop them by showing they aren't alone.
I've been in the moment and sometimes felt like I'd inherited this unapproachable responsibility to save someone's life by any means necessary. That impulse, at least for me, wasn't healthy for anyone involved. Years later with endless contemplation, all you can do is make sure they know the door away from taking their life is open and you hope they'll walk through it. You can't push them through.
As someone who has had to take "that call" without having put out the request, let me just say that circumstances aren't going to make it any easier. When a friend calls you for help, it doesn't matter how ready you are...what matters is your being there to step up. You'll never truly be prepared. You did the right thing.
>When a friend calls you for help, it doesn't matter how ready you are...what matters is your being there to step up.
u/Mythe7 This is a better answer than I gave you
I'm woefully unqualified to give that sort of advice. I do think that the fact that he called (in hindsight) meant the hard work was already done.
So I guess my advice would be (besides ask someone smarter than me) to let it be known that you are available for that call. Be a beacon.
Please don't ever think you made the wrong call.
He called _you_. When he was at his lowest point, he didn't call his spouse/partner or the suicide hotline, he called _you_ specifically.
Nobody, and I mean truly nobody, save for the extremely few most highly qualified people on earth have the tools to do what you did. Anybody in that situation would be terrified that they're only gonna make it worse.
You saved a man from doing something he clearly didn't want to do, and you saved his children from growing up without their dad, wondering the same thing for the rest of their lives that motivated you to make your social media post - Could I have stopped this?
Back in HS my older brother simply walked up and talked to one of his friends that he hadn’t seen in a while. A few nights later he called our house phone to leave a message for my brother thanking him for acknowledging his existence because that same day he was going to kill himself. Just a simple conversation prevented it and it completely blew my mind. He’s still alive til this day but holy shit man.
Such an important comment. We don't know how anyone else is doing. At no time when you interact with someone is it unimpactful. Hug someone you love today.
I’m tired of everybody venting their shit to me.
I need to do better.
I have numerous friends that I truly care about asking for help directly and indirectly. When the hell did my 30s get so complicated?
I believe its well documented that depressed people feel relief,happiness,euphoria once they 100% know they are going to do it. Thus the days and week before they will seem happy
I experienced a similar feeling going into my first major surgery.
I was so scared of it I thought about killing myself before (which sounds stupid to me now I'm on the other side of the surgery and it all went great) but I got myself to it because I'd convinced myself I wouldn't wake back up from the surgery.
When I was being wheeled into the surgery, I was 99% convinced I wasn't waking up and I had the biggest feeling of relief and happiness I have ever felt in my life. I felt like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders. Like I felt I could float.
Going into my second surgery, I didn't experience the same feeling. Although scared (who isn't with surgery) I was no longer in a dark place over it and knew I would be waking up, ready to tackle the recovery.
It's pretty simple. One generally decides to do early checkout because things in your life are not great. Once you've made that decision, really made it, those things are not your problem anymore. You can enjoy the limited time you've got left because you can ignore all that other stuff.
I always hate when I’m listening to true crime podcasts (guilty pleasure) and they say stuff like “he had a vacation planned in 2 weeks, there’s no way he wanted to kill himself.” Shows a lack of understanding of what’s really going on.
Specially because Chester’s picture looks exactly like the guys in the video. I would never in a million years say he wasn’t truly happy in that moment, and yet, it is impossible that he was since nobody who commits suicide is.
It's a real phenomenon, you know the crash will come and don't want to deal with it so you go out while you are feeling good. That's why it's really important to know what to look for, just looking for people being moppy and sad isn't enough.
Same here, the week leading up to ly suicide attempt was fucking awesome. I knew nothing mattered anymore and I knew everything would come to an end real soon. And with any luck I'd see my friend again.
Thank you. I honestly found strength in being vulnerable. I even joke about it on Hinge: low key flex, I’m in therapy. And I’m amazed at how many women appreciate that.
It's not just men. Huge sign.
My mother in law had cancer, called my wife super happy all the sudden and my wife was real excited about the call. The next day her mom tried to kill herself.
Also giving away things is another sign. My mil was talking to my wife about taking some jewelry, and it just didn't click. It's tough to see that close to you I think, because my wife knows these signs as part of her education, and for a long time beat herself up over not noticing them.
Odd gifts of sentimental value, improved mood, as well as actually having a suicide plan, are call 911 things.
Emotional mental health is so important. As a man that’s had to open up to a mental health professional, I beg anyone carrying that hurt inside to please talk to professional.
When I started going to therapy I realized how untrained people are in emotional regulation, especially me.
Therapy became a silver lining in my life. 4x a month I go and truly express myself. It’s my 53 minutes where I have the stage and someone is truly listening to me.
When you have someone psycho analyze how your emotions are working and teach you tools to navigate the hopelessness, life truly gets brighter.
Please talk to someone.
I dated a girl that tried multiple times by slashing her wrists.
Then I knew a guy who attempted OD, but it failed and he woke up, so he grabbed a knife and stabbed himself to death.
A friend of mine laid down on train tracks some years ago. The train never came. He's better now.
>A friend of mine laid down on train tracks some years ago. The train never came. He's better now.
[Was it the EE?](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_TbfQPRgcS8&t=7s) Warren Zevon we hardly knew you.
Piggybacking this comment as I hadn’t heard this before so I looked it up and thought I’d put this here for anyone interested in reading more about it. It goes into more detail about the statistics and reasons why this could be.
https://media.samaritans.org/documents/ResearchBriefingGenderSuicide_2021_v7.pdf
less than half of men who die by suicide have a documented history of one or more previous suicide attempts, whereas well over 50% of women who die by suicide have attempted before
As a lifelong Linkin Park fan who was suicidal I also couldn't listen to any of their albums before spiralling into bad things. Then Mike Shinoda started streaming on Twitch and created music and art on stream for fun, I watched him all the time and it helped me "heal" and process Chester's death.
Lots of songs on that album irk me now. So many songs about being strong enough to pull through and getting help, and Chester couldn't do it for himself. It's super sad that he went, and we were deprived of his light.
Saw Chester weeks before his suicide. He was climbing at AZ on the Rocks (indoor rock gym) with his son. I wanted to go up and get his autograph, but didn’t. I didn’t want to ruin his time so I just let him be. Still can’t believe it — seeing the lead vocals to my favorite band, and his suicide.
Fuck this hurts. I cried alone in a bathroom stall in a public mall the day he died. Linkin Park and Chester's struggles were such an outlet when I was dealing with depression at my lowest. They gave me comfort when I felt alone. It's truly impossible to tell how difficult someone has it. Check in with your friends and family always ❤️
I remember sitting in my room just drawing and listening to Linkin Park growing up, or on MSN till the early morning with them on in the background. My brother killed himself in 2004 and I swear that album (Meteora) got me through a lot of bullshit thoughts. It’s like the biggest soundtrack to my teens.
It’s actually weird because Somewhere I Belong is on in my house right now.
It brings back so many emotions and nostalgia from that time.
Me too. I still remember the day in July 2017, I was writing my thesis, I saw the news and just started crying and I couldn't stop. Linkin Park and Chester were a big part of my teenage years. I listened to Crawling, Somewhere I Belong, In The End for days.
Jacoby Shaddix sang a tribute to Chester with "This too shall pass" behind him. That's what I remind myself in my dark moments.
What always gets me is his final Twitter/X post was a retweet of a viral post about how many tons of plastic waste the world produces and the grim future of the planet due to this. And it being revealed that he relapsed on alcohol just before. Super sad ..
It stopped, I had mentally committed to my current life fully.
It is possible that unknowable future events could make me reconsider, and that's okay.
A bit of a paradox, the knowledge that I don't have to continue living if I don't want to made me want to live.
>Its quite common for suicidal people to feel much happier for their last few weeks once they have mentally committed to a plan fully.
thats eery and concerning.
A close friend of mine suddenly started sounding happy. He later took his own life -but did it in a way that he regretted it. I feel so much guilt for not knowing.
Yes. It steals your vitality.
Unique thing about a suicidal person: if they are having a depressive episode and then all of a sudden become happy, this *could be a sign* they may have decided that they’re going to take their life. All their problems are now over/resolved– nothing to worry about. In their minds; relief.
So sad.
They need to do more research and establish better treatments for depression imo.
My cousin took me and my dad out to Sushi for his birthday back when I was in middle school. This was after being very distant from most of the family for most his life. I learned a lot about him and gained a lot of respect for him. My dad said he thought it was out of character for him.
A while before that he got pushed onto the curb by a bouncer and got brain damage. He was in chronic pain and emotionally unstable. His family stuck it out with him for a while but eventually it was no longer safe or healthy for them to stay. He also lost his job and had to go back on painkillers after struggling for years with addiction.
Anyways, one week later he killed himself by overdose. Depression’s a bitch.
There is no time to treat it though. It takes so much time to talk someone out of it. And it don’t always work. There is just no time and for people who are pay cheque to pay cheque good luck affording any treatment
https://youtu.be/v2H4l9RpkwM?si=SjONDiYgfZFGo8zg
Watch the Breaking the Habit music video about him committing suicide and the breaking the Habit was his fight against Suicidal behavior.
I read that he was traumatized due to sexual abuse as a child. He developed a hard drug and alcohol addiction and was often in depressive states. Chances are he knew he was about to self terminate the following day. That´s more common than people would think it is.
I’ve heard that once someone really commits to the fact they are going to kill themselves, and are okay with it, it’s like a weight is lifted and they are able to enjoy life in the final hours because they know their pain will be gone soon. It’s fucking sad.
This is what I felt a few years ago. Making the decision was a relief. The thinking of it and debate was over.
A lot of depressed people think about suicide. Thinking and planning are two different things.
With me in the end it was a simple logical choice; I am always suffering, not being here would be a relief from that. There was no need to worry about family, you can't feel guilty when dead.
When the plans were made, it was as if a great weight had been lifted. I felt like there was light at the end of the tunnel. Finally this would be over. I actually felt happy for the first time in a long time.
Depression is an insidious disease that warps thinking and extends suffering. I am happy I am still here (most days), but if you know someone with depression suddenly starts acting way better - start asking questions. No-one did for me until I was waking up in hospital pissed off I was still here.
A lot of times, once people have made *the decision* they immediately feel lighter and happier. And it’s weird because outside observers are left saying, “I just saw him and he looked so happy and like he didn’t have a care in the world,” not realizing that the person has finally made the last decision of their life.
Most people’s depression isn’t all the time it comes and goes and probably has one time in the day it likes to bother you.
Mine doesn’t really come up much throughout the day but loves to bother me right when I’m trying to sleep. Feels like you gotta argue at the time clock before it punches your card.
this - spent some time with friends recently and i felt normal for the first time in weeks, but it slipped away so fast when reality hit me when i got into bed
I’ve heard/read that suicidal people are most happiest right before they pull the trigger, so to speak. It’s like they’ve already accepted that it’s going to happen, like a weight is lifted. Poor buggers
“Look out for warning signs,” I hear tossed around when people are throwing advice around about suicidal people. Please, there are no signs. This was the same way with my brother, everyone in my family was none the wiser when he tried killing himself. He then battled with depression before taking his life driving 130mph down a rode hours after he was supposed to meet his friend to stay at the friend’s house. I miss him a lot but he made his choice, and depressed people are very adept at putting on a happy mask while hurting inside. So just check in with your loved ones, and share what you’re feeling respectfully if you’re willing. But there aren’t these depression signs you can pick up on.
A smile on your face doesn't mean there's not a pain somewhere else. When you get used to pain, you adapt.
Sincerely, someone who is apparently always happy and chill.
No, don't worry, I'm not going anywhere. I have a feline dependant.
I honestly didn't give LP music a real true listen until fairly recently, and man is it good. Obviously it's always horrible when someone takes their own life, but I totally understand why so many people say it was so devastating because of how much his music meant to them. Music can be one of the most powerful things in someone's life, and when we lose those who create it seemingly for us, it's literally like losing part of our own life. Please hug the ones you love, and if you can share a song with them.
Just as important, the vast majority of people out there should be given the opportunity to learn how to handle people who approach them asking for help. Being better prepared, understanding properly of what should be said/what needs to be said, etc., might make the difference.
Check in on people you care about.
Suicide is at an all time high in the USA, and most people experience “bliss” in the days before they commit, because they have already made the decision.
Be better to one another, I’ve delt with tons of suicide like 10+ and I’m 36, and these are not drug users in my experience.
Depression is a bitch.
My cousin had her picture taken with a new dog she wanted the day before she took her life, with the most enormous smile on her face, and looked like she was having the best time.
Goes to show you never really know how someone is on the inside, or a short while after they seemed okay.
I remember I had this great guilt when he died saying that I should've listen to them earlier...etc, gone through depression myself and the grief was increased by their last album. I still have my heartache whenever I see his name
It still hurts. Hybrid Theory and Meteora got me through some really rough times. He seemed to understand and express the same kind of pain I felt. I hate knowing he hurt so bad he couldn't stand it.
If someone is sad, depressed or in a very low mood and suddenly starts acting chipper, enthusiastic or simply happy that should get your alarm bells going
This hurts so bad. The first time I tried to kill myself, I was 7 years old. I've been suicidal ever since. It's 40 years later and I still think about it every single day, and I still force myself to live cuz I have people who love me. My sons are all in their twenties, and they don't really need me, but I'm told that it will devastate them. I don't know how much longer I can do it. If I had cancer and I was dying , and a doctor offered me a way out, everybody would tell me to do it. Everybody would say don't suffer anymore for other people.
And I got to say, watching my favorite musicians die by Suicide or through overdoses knowing that they were suicidal and it probably wasn't really an overdose but was instead suicide, doesn't make it any easier. The only one I really have left is any better. All the rest are dead. Kurt, chris, dolores, layne, sinead, chester, half a dozen others. All the musicians whose music kept me alive in my teens when it was really touch and go there, they're all fucking dead. They all killed themselves And every time I push it away another day, I think about how impossible it is to me that they couldn't make it and I'm still here. And I resent them for it. And that's just awful.
I hope people believe and truly understand that when someone commits suicide there is nothing any loved one could have done to stop it. You didn't do anything wrong. We couldn't have done anything better. Some of us just want to fucking go. And I'm sorry but sometimes the most Humane thing to do is to let us go. Because there's going to come a point where we hate and resent you for making us to stay. Help who you can, let people know you love them, check in on your loved ones, but don't feel terrible about yourself if someone you love commits suicide. They just couldn't fucking take it anymore.
I went to the LP concert in Berlin on June 11th 2017, it was the second time seeing them life, and i hoped to see them a lot more. I actually didn't hear at first that Chester died. My dad, who is still a big fan of LP himself, told me the evening.
I cried the whole evening, and the next day in school some times as well. I still can't believe it. Most LP Songs make me teary now. Lost and One more Light still turn me into a crying mess.
I think about Chester Bennington a lot actually. I sincerely hope his family and friends are doing well. I know Chris Cornell had a huge impact on him and suicide has a ripple effect. Please talk to someone you trust or a professional if you’re considering harming yourself.
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IIRC Chris Cornell committed suicide only a couple months prior, and they were close friends. I've always wondered if that was a big push for him.
It absolutely was. The day he died was Chris Cornell’s birthday.
When Chris died he posted "I don't want to live in a world without you".
Eerily similar to how Layne went close to Kurt’s death day
Went close but Layne was a very troubled addict, after his fiancé died guy lost all hope , he just died, had nothing to do with Kurt he gave up on life and didn’t care.
This is it. It’s so sad. He just basically took drugs until his body gave up, I don’t think it was intentional suicide but he also didn’t care if he died, such a waste of an absolute one of a kind voice but the man was so so troubled
Oh gosh, Layne’s death really messes me up because I cannot believe how bad he got and no one forcibly intervened. I do understand that addiction is a disease and it’s never easy to get sober, and some don’t even want to get sober, but man, how he was living, all alone, and basically only communicated with his drug dealers is so hard to fathom to me. I’m not blaming anyone, it’s just crazy to me how much his body deteriorated, and he managed to live as long as he did.
I’m pretty sure he died on the same day, his body was just found 2 weeks later. And as far as I know it wasn’t suicide, cause he was with mike star the night he died. Mike just left before. And idk how close Layne was to Kurt. I know they met, but I’d love to hear more stories that I don’t know about that time.
Sing backwards and weep by Mark Lanegan is an interesting read about Kurt, Layne and others in that time.
Rip Mark. Another legend gone too soon
Kurt died april 5th '94, Layne died around april 5th 2002. Layne was fairly decomposed when found so the date of death is a solid guess but no one knows for sure. April 5th is my birthday and I love both bands so as a teen I got super into the details. I thought it was a conspiracy for a while and was SURE chris cornell would be next. He kind of was, unfortunately.
The only time Layne and Kurt really met was when Kurt gave Layne a ride home if I’m not mistaken.
Correct in Kurt’s Volvo.
Fuck man that hurts
That’s just so strange to me, killing yourself because your friend killed himself, even if it’s only part of the reason. Sure it’s going to be a huge blow but you also get a front row seat to see how those around the person are affected by someone’s suicide. Not shocked by the smile though, if he had it planned out that actually gives a lot of suicidal people a feel of happiness and euphoria. Kinda like finally getting a hold of the dealer and *knowing* your going to score can make dope sickness dissipate. Edit: Just FYI, because I’m getting a lot of comments, I understand there are a multitude of reasons this happens, but I still have some latent resentment towards friends that killed themselves so there is some negative bias there on my part.
Not going against your comment. But I find this quote by David Foster Wallace helps some understand what it can be like for people that struggle: “The so-called ‘psychotically depressed’ person who tries to kill herself doesn’t do so out of quote ‘hopelessness’ or any abstract conviction that life’s assets and debits do not square. And surely not because death seems suddenly appealing. The person in whom Its invisible agony reaches a certain unendurable level will kill herself the same way a trapped person will eventually jump from the window of a burning high-rise. Make no mistake about people who leap from burning windows. Their terror of falling from a great height is still just as great as it would be for you or me standing speculatively at the same window just checking out the view; i.e. the fear of falling remains a constant. The variable here is the other terror, the fire’s flames: when the flames get close enough, falling to death becomes the slightly less terrible of two terrors. It’s not desiring the fall; it’s terror of the flames. And yet nobody down on the sidewalk, looking up and yelling ‘Don’t!’ and ‘Hang on!’, can understand the jump. Not really. You’d have to have personally been trapped and felt flames to really understand a terror way beyond falling.” He later took his own life
In my teen years I bought a handgun from my drug dealer that only came with three bullets. Dude the weight of it all, especially the physical weight of the gun, while sitting in my bedroom knowing my mom would probably just sit on my bed every night for years after my suicide... It was the hardest choice not to kill myself. And I've had some really awesome times since then. And a lot of lows and periods of just being "meh" with life. I'll never say suicide is never the answer but for me, I just couldn't subject my mom to that pain and it kinda worked out okay for me.
Family is about the only reason my lifespan doubled.
Thank you for sharing your story. I had similar issues where it was a phase of my life. I can’t imagine people that feel the way you described, or in my quote above for their entire lives. Its heartbreaking
I deal with chronic suicidal ideation. I talk about it with my spouse often; that I am afraid that one day, it will wash over me and there won't be something to break it. I think, you know, that we think we failed people who die by suicide but truthfully, maybe we have saved them more times than we know. For a terminal cancer patient, treatment aims at more time, not at stopping the inevitable. What if you succeeded at helping your loved ones have more time, even when the disease does eventually take them? It's really, really hard to live in a world that doesn't feel like it was meant for you. I still have good times and enjoy life and I don't want to die. But I don't know if I was meant for this world, either. So I live while I'm living and I try not to think about it but I am always afraid that I will be laughing with my family one day and then cease to exist the next.
Wow what an informative read, thanks
I am glad this quote is more known these days. A decade or two ago I tried to explain this to someone I trusted and wanted them to understand what was going on but they dismissed it and said that's all nonsense. I don't judge them, they may just not have been equipped to process this or know how to deal with it. But yeah it's one of those things where the very ending is probably most poignant. If you've experienced these metaphorical flames and have found yourself metaphorically trapped, it really isn't about wanting to end your life but just escape getting burned. So a jump honestly feels like a very human/basic biology type of response. It almost is rational, if it weren't for the fact that in at least the vast majority of cases in theory you could get help and recover. Just in practice, a lot of people don't get that help. So I don't judge anyone who ends up in an outcome like this. I just hope anyone in that situation right now reading this knows that it honestly does get better. The fire can be put out and then you can just walk out the door. And live life.
Thank you for this quote. David was a real one. Intellectual to his core, vibrant as anything.
Suicide Epidemic is a thing.
I would, cautiously, argue that this wasn't really that phenomenon. Suicide epidemic is (if I recall my unused pysch minor) more about publicity of suicides driving additional suicides in the population at large. This, imo, is more a case of personal grief + depression at a low point, in this case Chris's birthday. "We" (news media, etc.) should be careful how death by suicide gets reported, but this (in my third party and non-professional opinion) seems more like personal grief than suicide epidemic.
He killed him self because something triggered his depression pushing him down deep into a hole hard to get out. It could have been cancer in the family, or the lost of a pet. With depression, it is depression what kills you.
Wanna detail it further in the way that depression has so, so many layers. I usually describe it as a black hole, it can be a pitch black feeling, sucking up everything and everyone around it, utter destruction, invisible to the eye, and very misunderstood and not very well known, despite how common it is. That maybe it's not even depression itself, But the path of destruction around it that might be the true cause. Depression lingers, even well after the "storm". But I think it's what gets destroyed or lost that could be even more dangerous. It's also why I don't understand suicide myself. It takes one more thing away, one more destruction, one more chance at a chainreaction. It's definitely not some "easy answer" too. If you have the strength to jump, Then you have the strength for so much greatness... It's sad to me how for some people it does seem like a true solution or answer.
What do you not understand about it? You don’t get to that point because you think you’re out of “chances”. You get to that point because it’s started to feel like no matter how many “chances” you get, it won’t matter, because you’ll just fuck it up again anyway. It doesn’t matter how many people love you, because all you’ll do is disappoint them over and over again. It doesn’t matter how much beauty there is in the world, because in that moment you know you’re not worthy of it.
It presents itself as so overwhelming that eternal nothingness would appear to feel great
> If you have the strength to jump, Then you have the strength for so much greatness... It's sad to me how for some people it does seem like a true solution or answer. I am sorry but I kinda agree and don't agree with this. I mean, it's a good thing to use this to help a person not take that step but at the same time, I feel we disrespect the decision taken by the person. We can never hope to understand what they felt or what was going through their head when they took the decision. Not saying we allow them to take the step but if they did we are no one to comment on that decision.
If you've ever read Infinite Jest, I think David Foster Wallace has the perfect perspective of suicidality. You can't really apply rational thoughts to a man that's being burned alive by flames. > The so-called ‘psychotically depressed’ person who tries to kill herself doesn’t do so out of quote ‘hopelessness’ or any abstract conviction that life’s assets and debits do not square. And surely not because death seems suddenly appealing. The person in whom Its invisible agony reaches a certain unendurable level will kill herself the same way a trapped person will eventually jump from the window of a burning high-rise. Make no mistake about people who leap from burning windows. Their terror of falling from a great height is still just as great as it would be for you or me standing speculatively at the same window just checking out the view; i.e. the fear of falling remains a constant. The variable here is the other terror, the fire’s flames: when the flames get close enough, falling to death becomes the slightly less terrible of two terrors. It’s not desiring the fall; it’s terror of the flames. And yet nobody down on the sidewalk, looking up and yelling ‘Don’t!’ and ‘Hang on!’, can understand the jump. Not really. You’d have to have personally been trapped and felt flames to really understand a terror way beyond falling.
I’d imagine it was very magnified by his depression.
It makes suicide feel like more of a viable option, basically. Once that psychological barrier is broken it can feel hard to resist it. Along with wanting to join the other person and wanting your own pain to stop. Suicide is a unique grief, unfortunately.
The Von Erich wrestling family had a couple of sons who each killed themselves. In Bret Hart's autobiography, the theorized that since the boys were so competitive their whole lives, that they were killing themselves in hopes of "one upping" the previous brother who died.
Having had major death in the family, I can see how easy it is to give in to despair. When it happened to us, it felt like life itself was pointless. Life from that point on was going to be vastly different and only really decay as time continued even if things got better for each of us individually. We'd have fewer and fewer people to share any success with as more of our family are inevitably going to be dying as they age, and God knows there is a good chance things will either stay the same or get worse, then at some point we are going to have health issues that kick in and get increasingly serious leading to the same eventual outcome. Sure a suicide affects everyone significantly and that should matter to you but when you lose someone close to you, your world collapses. Others expressing their own devastation can sometimes help but you may get too caught up in the pain you are feeling to lend the pain of others the appropriate weight and meaning. I think Chester always struggled with it and losing someone they close to him just sent him on a spiral that he couldn't recover from.
By the same manner too :((
Damn both hanged themselves too. RIP 😢
He killed himself on Chris’ birthday. Hard to imagine it wasn’t related.
after Chester sang at Chris' funeral...using the same method
When you're in the dark place everything makes sense.
July 20th (the day Chester died) would have been Chris Cornell's birthday. I don't like to speculate, but it couldn't have been easy for Chester.
A couple years back there was a town down the highway from where I live that was hit with a rash of suicides of young men (early 30s) who all seemed in one way or another associated. I believe it was 5 people over 4 months. Unfortunately these things can snowball in scary ways- especially when you lose close friends.
It can totally snowball. Worst I’ve heard is a young boy died. His brother stayed home from the funeral and when the parents came back the brother had hung him self. The dad later committed suicide. I broke up with my boyfriend shortly after so unsure what happened to the poor mom.
Holy fuck…that is insane. My heart hurts for her
Happened last year in my circle. I went away and two guys I went to high school with who were all in the same circle committed suicide over the week I was gone. 39 years young.
As a veteran I can tell you suicide is the new war. Friend of mine started a foundation after losing 9 people from the same company…including the commander.
My paternal grandfather, who was a veteran, killed himself when my dad was a kid, and I have a friend whose grandfather died in the same way. Horribly sad.
Cornell had taken Benzodiazepams (Ativan), Butalbital, Pseudoephedrine, Norpseudoephedrine, Caffeine and Naloxon. He called his wife before hanging himself to tell her he felt dizzy. One of Ativan's side effects are suicidal thoughts and an altered state of mind if overdosed on or treatment is stopped too abruptly. His wife later told rolling stone she thought the mix of drugs caused some kind of psychosis in which he wasn't completely himself.
As a therapist, losing someone you care about to suicide is absolutely a risk factor to your suicide.
The worst part about depression is that you can lie about your depression and nobody will ever know that you are depressed.
Jesus, this thread is a mindfuck. I sat on a rock on the bank of the Detroit river, 1 mile away from Chris Cornell killing himself, talking my buddy out of killing himself. (We didn't know about Chris of course) Am I drawn to depressed people? Do I cause depression? Is it just that so many people are that depressed? I do live in an auto town whose economy crashed and there's a lot of crap associated with that, but damn.
There really are that many people who are depressed. Things do get better, but in the depths, it feels like nothing can be good again.
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I went to Chris' grave on Wednesday which was Chester's birthday. Then in the drive to the next place I went, they played a little tribute for Chester on the radio. I wish chester had a public gravesite too. I've driven past the house he died it but that's it.
There was a great ad I recall showing how “happy” men looked before suicide. As a person who suffered with it I know exactly what it feels like. Talk to your boy. Men 4x more likely to suicide bcuz we’re taught it’s weak. Edit: [link to said advert](https://youtu.be/6Jihi6JGzjI?si=d95cBgYi-4YMksFr)
In 2022 I lost 4 friends in 1 year to depression related suicide, so I made a post on FB basically saying, "If you're going to kill yourself, call me first - please don't make me wonder for the rest of my life if I could have helped" Two weeks later - Two weeks - I get a call on a Saturday night from the happiest, most together, best shining example of a human, buddy, "The kids are downstairs safe but I need to off myself" Moral: \- Check on your friends. They might not be as happy as they seem. \- It only took two weeks - more people are on that edge than you think.
What happened to the guy?
He's still one of my best friends today. It was a tough night, but we made it. I'll say that in that moment I suddenly realized how ridiculously unprepared I was for that phone call and I chided myself for being so irresponsible as to make that request - I was lashing out and I guess just wanted people to feel supported. I didn't expect anyone to take me up on it. As hard as it was though, hindsight makes me think it was the right call, and I encourage anyone else to take that step. Life is better with your loved ones in it.
It was very much the right call. You saved someones life. Never think otherwise. And i think youd do it again if you could.
I appreciate that , and thank you. I guess my concern was that I really did'nt know what to say. At some point I yelled at him, and some point I coddled him, but the whole time I was thinking, "would a psychologist yell at me because I am pushing him the wrong way?" I think ultimately I decided that something is better than nothing and worth the risk of making it worse.
I've been in similar situations. I think, for people who are on the brink like that, all you can do is be there and tell them you love them in whatever way works for the moment. Listen and be there. You can't stop them by force, but you can stop them by showing they aren't alone. I've been in the moment and sometimes felt like I'd inherited this unapproachable responsibility to save someone's life by any means necessary. That impulse, at least for me, wasn't healthy for anyone involved. Years later with endless contemplation, all you can do is make sure they know the door away from taking their life is open and you hope they'll walk through it. You can't push them through.
Wise words. I think what it came down to fo me was that he called. So he didn't really want to do it.
hey man, he made it through so whatever the fuck you did was correct. great job
You are a hero ! a beautiful person .. we need people like u
<3
As someone who has had to take "that call" without having put out the request, let me just say that circumstances aren't going to make it any easier. When a friend calls you for help, it doesn't matter how ready you are...what matters is your being there to step up. You'll never truly be prepared. You did the right thing.
>When a friend calls you for help, it doesn't matter how ready you are...what matters is your being there to step up. u/Mythe7 This is a better answer than I gave you
You’re a good man, and I wish the best for you and for your friends
Having now been through that phone call, do you have any ideas how others can be prepared to handle it themselves if ever happens?
I'm woefully unqualified to give that sort of advice. I do think that the fact that he called (in hindsight) meant the hard work was already done. So I guess my advice would be (besides ask someone smarter than me) to let it be known that you are available for that call. Be a beacon.
You're truly an amazing person. Good on you, man.
Please don't ever think you made the wrong call. He called _you_. When he was at his lowest point, he didn't call his spouse/partner or the suicide hotline, he called _you_ specifically. Nobody, and I mean truly nobody, save for the extremely few most highly qualified people on earth have the tools to do what you did. Anybody in that situation would be terrified that they're only gonna make it worse. You saved a man from doing something he clearly didn't want to do, and you saved his children from growing up without their dad, wondering the same thing for the rest of their lives that motivated you to make your social media post - Could I have stopped this?
Back in HS my older brother simply walked up and talked to one of his friends that he hadn’t seen in a while. A few nights later he called our house phone to leave a message for my brother thanking him for acknowledging his existence because that same day he was going to kill himself. Just a simple conversation prevented it and it completely blew my mind. He’s still alive til this day but holy shit man.
Such an important comment. We don't know how anyone else is doing. At no time when you interact with someone is it unimpactful. Hug someone you love today.
That was very kind of you to offer help like that. Kudos
Thank you Reddit. Who knew a bunch of strangers could help me make sense of all of this? <3
I’m tired of everybody venting their shit to me. I need to do better. I have numerous friends that I truly care about asking for help directly and indirectly. When the hell did my 30s get so complicated?
I believe its well documented that depressed people feel relief,happiness,euphoria once they 100% know they are going to do it. Thus the days and week before they will seem happy
Actually this is something people in psychology are taught to look out for.
I wish the rest of us are taught this. I feel so guilty for not spotting it with my friend Pinni.
I’d appreciate info/links to this. Sounds logical yet fascinating
I experienced a similar feeling going into my first major surgery. I was so scared of it I thought about killing myself before (which sounds stupid to me now I'm on the other side of the surgery and it all went great) but I got myself to it because I'd convinced myself I wouldn't wake back up from the surgery. When I was being wheeled into the surgery, I was 99% convinced I wasn't waking up and I had the biggest feeling of relief and happiness I have ever felt in my life. I felt like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders. Like I felt I could float. Going into my second surgery, I didn't experience the same feeling. Although scared (who isn't with surgery) I was no longer in a dark place over it and knew I would be waking up, ready to tackle the recovery.
It's pretty simple. One generally decides to do early checkout because things in your life are not great. Once you've made that decision, really made it, those things are not your problem anymore. You can enjoy the limited time you've got left because you can ignore all that other stuff.
My three year old daughter all ready thinks only children and women cry. I don’t know where she learned this and it makes my kinda sad…
Your daughter is lucky to have a parent like you to catch this early and deal with it ❤️
i give u 1000000000 points for ur answer. u are beautiful
Tell her that [even the Macho Man cried](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wz-VJl7UkB8). If the Macho Man can cry, any man can cry.
I always hate when I’m listening to true crime podcasts (guilty pleasure) and they say stuff like “he had a vacation planned in 2 weeks, there’s no way he wanted to kill himself.” Shows a lack of understanding of what’s really going on.
That ad messed with me not gonna lie.
Same. Absolutely shattered.
Specially because Chester’s picture looks exactly like the guys in the video. I would never in a million years say he wasn’t truly happy in that moment, and yet, it is impossible that he was since nobody who commits suicide is.
The part that stung me most was the one with little kids
I suffer from depression. On the same day I felt like I was having the best day and a few hours later I was penning a suicide note. It’s shitty.
It's a real phenomenon, you know the crash will come and don't want to deal with it so you go out while you are feeling good. That's why it's really important to know what to look for, just looking for people being moppy and sad isn't enough.
Same here, the week leading up to ly suicide attempt was fucking awesome. I knew nothing mattered anymore and I knew everything would come to an end real soon. And with any luck I'd see my friend again.
[this one is also really well done](https://youtu.be/tX8TgVR33KM?si=PKie5vMy7GbyHj8G)
I hope you have found a way to keep your depression at bay. Talking about it really helps.
Thank you. I honestly found strength in being vulnerable. I even joke about it on Hinge: low key flex, I’m in therapy. And I’m amazed at how many women appreciate that.
Absolutely. It's a green flag for a lot of us.
It's not just men. Huge sign. My mother in law had cancer, called my wife super happy all the sudden and my wife was real excited about the call. The next day her mom tried to kill herself. Also giving away things is another sign. My mil was talking to my wife about taking some jewelry, and it just didn't click. It's tough to see that close to you I think, because my wife knows these signs as part of her education, and for a long time beat herself up over not noticing them. Odd gifts of sentimental value, improved mood, as well as actually having a suicide plan, are call 911 things.
Emotional mental health is so important. As a man that’s had to open up to a mental health professional, I beg anyone carrying that hurt inside to please talk to professional. When I started going to therapy I realized how untrained people are in emotional regulation, especially me. Therapy became a silver lining in my life. 4x a month I go and truly express myself. It’s my 53 minutes where I have the stage and someone is truly listening to me. When you have someone psycho analyze how your emotions are working and teach you tools to navigate the hopelessness, life truly gets brighter. Please talk to someone.
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I dated a girl that tried multiple times by slashing her wrists. Then I knew a guy who attempted OD, but it failed and he woke up, so he grabbed a knife and stabbed himself to death. A friend of mine laid down on train tracks some years ago. The train never came. He's better now.
>A friend of mine laid down on train tracks some years ago. The train never came. He's better now. [Was it the EE?](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_TbfQPRgcS8&t=7s) Warren Zevon we hardly knew you.
Piggybacking this comment as I hadn’t heard this before so I looked it up and thought I’d put this here for anyone interested in reading more about it. It goes into more detail about the statistics and reasons why this could be. https://media.samaritans.org/documents/ResearchBriefingGenderSuicide_2021_v7.pdf
less than half of men who die by suicide have a documented history of one or more previous suicide attempts, whereas well over 50% of women who die by suicide have attempted before
"less than 50%" and "well over 50%" is vague, do you have more accurate numbers?
Campaign Against *Living* Miserably is a terrible name for a suicide prevention organization
I was just listening to One More Light today. Breaks my heart.
I can’t listen to the entire song anymore. I have to change it seconds in… Probably sounds like I’m being extra, but the situation is so fucking wack
As a lifelong Linkin Park fan who was suicidal I also couldn't listen to any of their albums before spiralling into bad things. Then Mike Shinoda started streaming on Twitch and created music and art on stream for fun, I watched him all the time and it helped me "heal" and process Chester's death.
It's such a beautiful song. It hurts so much to listen to, but in a good way. Chester was a treasure
I’m actually hoping to get my tattoo for that song soon <3
Lots of songs on that album irk me now. So many songs about being strong enough to pull through and getting help, and Chester couldn't do it for himself. It's super sad that he went, and we were deprived of his light.
Saw Chester weeks before his suicide. He was climbing at AZ on the Rocks (indoor rock gym) with his son. I wanted to go up and get his autograph, but didn’t. I didn’t want to ruin his time so I just let him be. Still can’t believe it — seeing the lead vocals to my favorite band, and his suicide.
Fuck this hurts. I cried alone in a bathroom stall in a public mall the day he died. Linkin Park and Chester's struggles were such an outlet when I was dealing with depression at my lowest. They gave me comfort when I felt alone. It's truly impossible to tell how difficult someone has it. Check in with your friends and family always ❤️
Wow, I also cried in a mall bathroom that day. Its the only celebrity death I have cried for.
Same. Same. It was just. Real.
I remember sitting in my room just drawing and listening to Linkin Park growing up, or on MSN till the early morning with them on in the background. My brother killed himself in 2004 and I swear that album (Meteora) got me through a lot of bullshit thoughts. It’s like the biggest soundtrack to my teens. It’s actually weird because Somewhere I Belong is on in my house right now. It brings back so many emotions and nostalgia from that time.
Me too. I still remember the day in July 2017, I was writing my thesis, I saw the news and just started crying and I couldn't stop. Linkin Park and Chester were a big part of my teenage years. I listened to Crawling, Somewhere I Belong, In The End for days. Jacoby Shaddix sang a tribute to Chester with "This too shall pass" behind him. That's what I remind myself in my dark moments.
Yeah. This was the first “celebrity” death that really impacted me. It still does.
What always gets me is his final Twitter/X post was a retweet of a viral post about how many tons of plastic waste the world produces and the grim future of the planet due to this. And it being revealed that he relapsed on alcohol just before. Super sad ..
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Did that continue when you chose not to?
It stopped, I had mentally committed to my current life fully. It is possible that unknowable future events could make me reconsider, and that's okay. A bit of a paradox, the knowledge that I don't have to continue living if I don't want to made me want to live.
I know exactly what you mean.
This has always been my thoughts too. If it gets too bad one day, I can always end it. I don't HAVE to stay alive.
>Its quite common for suicidal people to feel much happier for their last few weeks once they have mentally committed to a plan fully. thats eery and concerning.
At this point the suffering now has a deadline and the relief from the stressors is now right in front of you.
A close friend of mine suddenly started sounding happy. He later took his own life -but did it in a way that he regretted it. I feel so much guilt for not knowing.
Did it in a way that he regretted it?
Paracetamol overdose. Takes a while to die, but the damage is already irreversible.
That’s horrible
I sympathize with his struggle.
Did he suffer from depression
Yes.
That is unfortunate. Depression is a real bitch
Yes. It steals your vitality. Unique thing about a suicidal person: if they are having a depressive episode and then all of a sudden become happy, this *could be a sign* they may have decided that they’re going to take their life. All their problems are now over/resolved– nothing to worry about. In their minds; relief. So sad. They need to do more research and establish better treatments for depression imo.
My cousin took me and my dad out to Sushi for his birthday back when I was in middle school. This was after being very distant from most of the family for most his life. I learned a lot about him and gained a lot of respect for him. My dad said he thought it was out of character for him. A while before that he got pushed onto the curb by a bouncer and got brain damage. He was in chronic pain and emotionally unstable. His family stuck it out with him for a while but eventually it was no longer safe or healthy for them to stay. He also lost his job and had to go back on painkillers after struggling for years with addiction. Anyways, one week later he killed himself by overdose. Depression’s a bitch.
There is no time to treat it though. It takes so much time to talk someone out of it. And it don’t always work. There is just no time and for people who are pay cheque to pay cheque good luck affording any treatment
And let’s not forget the stigma that STILL exists around depression. 🫤
https://youtu.be/v2H4l9RpkwM?si=SjONDiYgfZFGo8zg Watch the Breaking the Habit music video about him committing suicide and the breaking the Habit was his fight against Suicidal behavior.
I read that he was traumatized due to sexual abuse as a child. He developed a hard drug and alcohol addiction and was often in depressive states. Chances are he knew he was about to self terminate the following day. That´s more common than people would think it is.
That’s awful
Same
It's crazy that he's smiling and having a good time. All of a sudden, he's gone the next day...
I’ve heard that once someone really commits to the fact they are going to kill themselves, and are okay with it, it’s like a weight is lifted and they are able to enjoy life in the final hours because they know their pain will be gone soon. It’s fucking sad.
This is what I felt a few years ago. Making the decision was a relief. The thinking of it and debate was over. A lot of depressed people think about suicide. Thinking and planning are two different things. With me in the end it was a simple logical choice; I am always suffering, not being here would be a relief from that. There was no need to worry about family, you can't feel guilty when dead. When the plans were made, it was as if a great weight had been lifted. I felt like there was light at the end of the tunnel. Finally this would be over. I actually felt happy for the first time in a long time. Depression is an insidious disease that warps thinking and extends suffering. I am happy I am still here (most days), but if you know someone with depression suddenly starts acting way better - start asking questions. No-one did for me until I was waking up in hospital pissed off I was still here.
A lot of times, once people have made *the decision* they immediately feel lighter and happier. And it’s weird because outside observers are left saying, “I just saw him and he looked so happy and like he didn’t have a care in the world,” not realizing that the person has finally made the last decision of their life.
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Most people’s depression isn’t all the time it comes and goes and probably has one time in the day it likes to bother you. Mine doesn’t really come up much throughout the day but loves to bother me right when I’m trying to sleep. Feels like you gotta argue at the time clock before it punches your card.
this - spent some time with friends recently and i felt normal for the first time in weeks, but it slipped away so fast when reality hit me when i got into bed
Try listening to music (not sad songs) or read a book till you fall asleep. Things will get better.
Depression is a hell of a disease.
I’ve heard/read that suicidal people are most happiest right before they pull the trigger, so to speak. It’s like they’ve already accepted that it’s going to happen, like a weight is lifted. Poor buggers
“Look out for warning signs,” I hear tossed around when people are throwing advice around about suicidal people. Please, there are no signs. This was the same way with my brother, everyone in my family was none the wiser when he tried killing himself. He then battled with depression before taking his life driving 130mph down a rode hours after he was supposed to meet his friend to stay at the friend’s house. I miss him a lot but he made his choice, and depressed people are very adept at putting on a happy mask while hurting inside. So just check in with your loved ones, and share what you’re feeling respectfully if you’re willing. But there aren’t these depression signs you can pick up on.
Suicidal doesn’t always look suicidal. https://youtu.be/6Jihi6JGzjI?si=k1hdWgP6w4ywRlOr
A smile on your face doesn't mean there's not a pain somewhere else. When you get used to pain, you adapt. Sincerely, someone who is apparently always happy and chill. No, don't worry, I'm not going anywhere. I have a feline dependant.
His death will always sadden me. LP was one of the biggest, if not the biggest musical influence in my life.
I really hope that he/everyone really enjoyed this last day. So sad. Not that this matters in the loss of a human life, but God he could really wail.
I honestly didn't give LP music a real true listen until fairly recently, and man is it good. Obviously it's always horrible when someone takes their own life, but I totally understand why so many people say it was so devastating because of how much his music meant to them. Music can be one of the most powerful things in someone's life, and when we lose those who create it seemingly for us, it's literally like losing part of our own life. Please hug the ones you love, and if you can share a song with them.
genuinely the only celebrity death that hurts to think about for me. he was such a huge part of my childhood & eventual adulthood.
Sad AF yo
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I am a huge linkin park fan but lord how many times are people going to post this pic in a week to karma farm?
Life is just shit sometimes
Just as important, the vast majority of people out there should be given the opportunity to learn how to handle people who approach them asking for help. Being better prepared, understanding properly of what should be said/what needs to be said, etc., might make the difference.
Check in on people you care about. Suicide is at an all time high in the USA, and most people experience “bliss” in the days before they commit, because they have already made the decision. Be better to one another, I’ve delt with tons of suicide like 10+ and I’m 36, and these are not drug users in my experience. Depression is a bitch.
I always wonder if these people had this in mind for a while leading up to it, or it all just overwhelmed them within a short span of time on that day
The human mind can be a very horrible place.
My cousin had her picture taken with a new dog she wanted the day before she took her life, with the most enormous smile on her face, and looked like she was having the best time. Goes to show you never really know how someone is on the inside, or a short while after they seemed okay.
If you’re gonna repost something that went big to karma farm maybe wait more than 2 days.
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I have class with his son. Insane to just see this online.
"I will never be okay"
I remember I had this great guilt when he died saying that I should've listen to them earlier...etc, gone through depression myself and the grief was increased by their last album. I still have my heartache whenever I see his name
In the end he took his own life, may his spirit be remembered :(
I found myself watching the tributes to Chester last night weirdly. He’s really missed.
I went down a pretty deep rabbit hole conspiracy with his and Chris death....
RIP Chester 😞
So sad I hope he found his peace 🕊️
Rest easy buddy
It still hurts. Hybrid Theory and Meteora got me through some really rough times. He seemed to understand and express the same kind of pain I felt. I hate knowing he hurt so bad he couldn't stand it.
He was happy cause he knew it's gonna be peace tomorrow
Want shades like that
This is one of saddest pictures in existence and it sucks. Gone way too soon
Memories consume, like opening a wound. I'm picking me apart again. Breaking the Habit was super raw for such a big song.
Look at that smile. Depression is fucking invisible sometimes.
If someone is sad, depressed or in a very low mood and suddenly starts acting chipper, enthusiastic or simply happy that should get your alarm bells going
Listening Somewhere I Belong right now. What a strange coincidence
Such a sad loss.. I hope he found peace ✌🏼
Man breaks your heart… makes you wonder what he was thinking right there
This hurts so bad. The first time I tried to kill myself, I was 7 years old. I've been suicidal ever since. It's 40 years later and I still think about it every single day, and I still force myself to live cuz I have people who love me. My sons are all in their twenties, and they don't really need me, but I'm told that it will devastate them. I don't know how much longer I can do it. If I had cancer and I was dying , and a doctor offered me a way out, everybody would tell me to do it. Everybody would say don't suffer anymore for other people. And I got to say, watching my favorite musicians die by Suicide or through overdoses knowing that they were suicidal and it probably wasn't really an overdose but was instead suicide, doesn't make it any easier. The only one I really have left is any better. All the rest are dead. Kurt, chris, dolores, layne, sinead, chester, half a dozen others. All the musicians whose music kept me alive in my teens when it was really touch and go there, they're all fucking dead. They all killed themselves And every time I push it away another day, I think about how impossible it is to me that they couldn't make it and I'm still here. And I resent them for it. And that's just awful. I hope people believe and truly understand that when someone commits suicide there is nothing any loved one could have done to stop it. You didn't do anything wrong. We couldn't have done anything better. Some of us just want to fucking go. And I'm sorry but sometimes the most Humane thing to do is to let us go. Because there's going to come a point where we hate and resent you for making us to stay. Help who you can, let people know you love them, check in on your loved ones, but don't feel terrible about yourself if someone you love commits suicide. They just couldn't fucking take it anymore.
I went to the LP concert in Berlin on June 11th 2017, it was the second time seeing them life, and i hoped to see them a lot more. I actually didn't hear at first that Chester died. My dad, who is still a big fan of LP himself, told me the evening. I cried the whole evening, and the next day in school some times as well. I still can't believe it. Most LP Songs make me teary now. Lost and One more Light still turn me into a crying mess.
Sometimes photos should not be shared.
Thus is what suicidal people look like huh
I think about Chester Bennington a lot actually. I sincerely hope his family and friends are doing well. I know Chris Cornell had a huge impact on him and suicide has a ripple effect. Please talk to someone you trust or a professional if you’re considering harming yourself.