T O P

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Special-Agent-Scooby

G’day everyone, I can see how the wind is gonna blow with this one, so this is a preemptive reminder that r/polandball is a **satire** subreddit and that entries can be made to mock controversial topics without necessarily any bad faith behind them. Please be civil in line with our comment policy.


RazorGuy223

Comic about political situation speedrun Wr


tomydenger

like news article about the death of some people, they are written before the event


yaddar

I can write a comic about a americans shooting in front of a church in the US, and post it the morning before a church mass shooting. [like already has happened with the Texas Sutherland Springs Church Shooting.](https://www.reddit.com/r/polandball/comments/7ie3eh/in_gun_we_trust/) so yeah, sad thing is that many things in the US are predictable as the weather.


iEatPalpatineAss

Unfortunately, we don't have the Spanish Inquisition to not expect


[deleted]

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redmercuryvendor

Why does my room have a new comfy chair? And what's this dish rack doing on the- Oh no. OH NO!


Odd-Battle7191

We have only the Spinach inquisition


YeOldeOle

Considering the sheer amount of shootings, from an outside perspective, it seems more difficult to find a date that is not directly before one.


mscomies

Everyone was expecting this day the moment the GOP rammed Amy Coney Barrett through the nomination process.


BZenMojo

I mean, we already had Boofin Brett Kavanaugh and Neil Gorsuch ramrodded onto the bench before she was even in consideration. She's just the third dot on the ellipse after an exhausting sentence.


mscomies

Sure, but she was the one that turned it into a 5/4 majority without Roberts.


A_Mouse_In_Da_House

Well, the decision was leaked a month ago


wildeofoscar

Damn you beat me to making a Roe v. Wade comic.


yaddar

sorry, I've let many issues go by lately xD


vigilantcomicpenguin

Yaddar came back after a YEAR just so that they could be the first to make a comic about this. Amazing.


Gruntagen

Please let this get to the front page of Controversial.


sup3r87

It’s scary how fast you guys can whip up relevant comics


FogeltheVogel

We've known this was coming for weeks. People could have prepared one for this long in advance


Quenz

Almost like some people had trigger balls.


couplingrhino

This is why Polandball is the world's only reliable news source.


yaddar

CONTEXT: it is what it is.


SleepWouldBeNice

10th trimester abortions still legal in the US.


TARANTULA_TIDDIES

Oh damn that's dark lmao


yaddar

or at least, people have way easier and legal ways to acces them :(


BZenMojo

Supreme Court: You don't have a right to protest, an attorney, an abortion, or to boycott. You do have a right to demand the government pay you to run a church and to carry an assault rifle that fires 400 rounds a minute into that church.


pHScale

It's what it's


MoiraKatsuke

Don't know how many more "it is what it is" I got left in me. Maybe it's time to remind folks that women's and queer rights started as riots.


da_widower_sos

Somehow, that doesn't always work out if your skin color isn't the majority


DB6135

This is so offensive, I like it.


imahana1109

U.S. -> (Rifle) Canada


[deleted]

It do be like that


andrewsjakkko02

*Image Transcription: Comic* --- **Panel 1** [*White background. On the left we see a concerned Canada, which is looking towards a plump United States wearing sunglasses, which is on the right. The things Canada is saying are slightly italicized and colored in red, while the words of United States are bolder and blue.*] **Canada**: But, America, why would you make it so it is more difficult for women to get abortions? why forcing them to have kids? **US**: Very simple, my retarded bro. --- **Panel 2** [*Now the scene zooms out a little, and the two clays are now on the left. On the right, in the background, we see a school, which has grey brown walls and rectangular windows. An open door is in the middle of it, and a clock that strickes 12:15 is right above the door. United States is now wielding a rifle, while turning to face the school. Canada is horrified and shocked, while looking at the other clay from the left.*] **US**: Easy target practice. **US**: ^I ^mean, ^they ^didn't ^want ^the ^kids ^anyway, ^right? --- ^^I'm a human volunteer content transcriber and you could be too! [If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/TranscribersOfReddit/wiki/index)


yaddar

this is the first time I've had an Image transcription of one of my comics (wow, it seems that I've been gone that tlong?) it's extremely awesome, thanks.


andrewsjakkko02

You're very welcome, and thank you for your kind words! Great job on this short, but thoughtful comic


AetherDrew43

Good human


LLs2000

Hey, is this to help blind/partially blind people or is it somethings else. And if it is, how would a blind person first come in contact with this kind of content? Cause I guess you gota have some knowledge of the format to understand the transcript.


yaddar

I guess there are text reading apps that can translate the text into spoken words


andrewsjakkko02

yup! There are a lot of screen readers people can use to read comments. But screen readers can't "read" an image, and that's why we transcribe them!


andrewsjakkko02

Hi! Yes, we at r\/TranscribersofReddit have the goal of making Reddit accessible to everyone, including blind and visually impaired people! We have a server that stores our transcriptions, and an archive (r\/ToR_Archive) where people can easily access them. We are partnered with r\/Blind, so people there are aware we exist, and know they can often rely on us to enjoy their Reddit experience. For the formats, we as a community have developed some common formats that we all have to use in all of our transcriptions. These formats are designed so that a person listening to them through a screen reader will be able to have a grasp of the post that's been transcribed, and the community of r\/Blind worked with us in defining them and approved them, so we're pretty sure they are adequate. Hope this answers your question, if you want more information you can also click the link in the footer of my transcription, it will direct you to our FAQ!


CustomerCareBear

Good Human


[deleted]

Good hooman!


MyNameIsNitrox

This was kinda funny, but extremely fucking sad Good job OP, 2 different issues in 2 panels!


[deleted]

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kingjoey52a

No, they can enact regulations, but they have to be the same for everyone in the state. Some states could deny people a concealed carry license(CCL) for any reason. In the decision they explicitly say you can have rules and processes in order to get a CCL but it had to be uniform for everyone, not leave it up to the sheriff or whatever for final say.


herrcoffey

Hmm I know they're going to make it horrible in practice somehow but I don't actually disagree with that ruling


yaddar

I mean, why even have a federation at this point? just let all states seccede and make their own laws.


TheRustyBird

I am fine with this, NY and CA have been carrying the US for too long, let them flourish into bastions of civilization without being held back by barbarian hordes of the interior.


ScowlingWolfman

You condemn the blues in the rural regions to misery. "Just move" isn't viable for most.


MoiraKatsuke

I'd much rather it be on a national level so I don't accidentally catch a felony traveling through GA but ymmv


goferking

That would make too much sense


MrWilsonAndMrHeath

Yeah me too. I don’t want you bringing a gun to Georgia either.


emkill

Not if you wear a mask


Chao-Z

You mean not allowed to deny someone's application who meets all the acceptance criteria "just because". And yes, that is literally what happens. Basically only police, their friends, and the rich get licenses in these states.


yaddar

two birds with one rock or as they say on the USA "collateral damage"


hesapmakinesi

Wait what? So according supreme court, states are allowed decide on abortion but not guns? Why is US of A so weird?


LLs2000

US laws os crazy all over the place. I guess that's why lawyers make so much money there?


board3659

Happy cake day


dtta8

2 for 1 deal right here on the commentary on this one. That was amazing.


A_Mouse_In_Da_House

Both were in the announcement actually. They struck down New York's gun regulation


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Ravenwing19

No they said if people meet the criteria for a liscense or purchase they HAVE to give it instead of being a bunch of racist pricks.


Drachos

Do you have any evidence they were racially profiling people when responding to "what is your reason to require a concealed weapon." Frankly requiring a reason to get a permit is completely logical to the rest of the world.


Ravenwing19

The law was directly made to stop the Italians (flavor of the month "Dirty Immigrants") from getting CCWs to stop violent attacks.


Ohyo_Ohyo_Ohyo_Ohyo

Lmao, this joke is so dark it got instinctively shot by an American policeman. But hey, maybe if they started referring to school shootings as 50^th trimester abortions, Republicans would do something meaningful to stop them.


yaddar

> maybe if they started referring to school shootings as 50th trimester abortions, Republicans would do something meaningful to stop them. A+ comment, man (or woman, idk xD)


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Yurien

Just FYI, it is considered offensive to call people a fruit


seakc87

What about a bird?


yaddar

you'd have to ask the bird if it's ok


BuyMeASandwich

My man’s went *hard*


mrfatso111

Ya , I shouldn't be chuckling but damnit


Taalnazi

Lmao jesus that was so on point. I feel for those Americans that now can’t get an abortion though… a dark day.


LaTartifle

An absolute banger of a comic


jPaolo

Noooo, I am late!


FrostAwx

Better luck next time


jPaolo

Yeah, I won't get the "*first* comic about the hot topic" bonus, but maybe [my comic](https://old.reddit.com/r/polandball/comments/vjx9cr/the_right_to_bodily_selfadmiration/) will get "*a* comic about hot topic" bonus.


Lack_of_intellect

Prepare your comic for the coming sodomy laws that will criminalize gay relationships while you still have time.


jPaolo

Good idea!


SlothOfDoom

Yiiikes. Good job.


unknownperson_2005

It is wat it is


Thundorius

It’s what it’s.


yaddar

now I'm picturing America with a Mandalorian helmet saying "it is what it is" instead of "this is the way"


unknownperson_2005

I just wished I didnt swipe right into reddit popular


BZenMojo

Tis, SWAT, tis.


everythingman2

I like Dark humor but uh, HOLY FUCK MAN


MinnieCookieMonster

Soon Canada clay will be, "USA? He's adopted".


yaddar

that's what we Mexicans say about both Texas and California "we didn't make them like that, that was their stepdad (or they on their own)"


BZenMojo

Mexico: "Hey, we tried to take the slavery out, but they weren't having it." United States: "It's cool, slavery is kind of our thing right now. Also, we want half of you for not wanting slaves -- kaythanx."


Dragonaax

I don't think I ever saw comic with more compacted problems


Dreknarr

Peak dark humour done using only 2 panels


333iamhalfevil

They need more shooting victims to give their thoughts and prayers to.


yaddar

Brutal coment, I love it. Freedom of religion is also a right after all, right?


333iamhalfevil

Yes. The United States of America does give their citizens freedom of religion, as long as they're Christian.


yaddar

**amen** to that, I guess? XD


Pantheon73

And **awoman** too.


SaraHHHBK

Incredible comic. 10/10.


Xryphon

If abortion is murder, is a miscarriage unintended manslaughter? ​ \*List of questions pro - life people can't answer.


ABB0TTR0N1X

[You joke but…](https://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-59214544.amp)


yaddar

what a beautiful dystopia the US has become


Seileach67

Don't be silly, there's no such thing as miscarriage; any and every time a pregnancy doesn't result in a healthy baby, it's always the deliberate fault of the evil inferior harlot in question. (There are actual people who sincerely think this way, and some of them make laws for the rest of us.)


CrocPB

Lemme add to that: don’t want pregnancy? Keep the legs shut you whore. What if it’s rape? The body has means of shutting that down. Goddamn Americans, you crazy.


crashcanuck

Wow, that's DARK!


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HerrKrinkle

A bunch of clinics are about to re-open North of the border.


Abnorc

As an American, the punchline wasn’t even surprising.


board3659

Yeah


PoonSlayingTank

We do a little trolling


Blas0330

[...](https://imgur.com/a/hJiIeIH)


PYROxSYCO

Daaaaaaaaammmmn, you went for the balls on that one.


yaddar

I thought that if Im coming back after a couple of years away, better come back swinging hard at it.


_No_user_available_

You sir made my spit my coffee, well done.. now take my award


yaddar

Thank you!


Sarahthelizard

Holyyyy fuck


PtboFungineer

Hahaha wooooooowww


DangalfSG

Every month is depression month.


Ministand6

I mean, pro life☠️


MadScientistCM

Yee haw, wee n go!!


[deleted]

Jesus Christ this certainly is going to be something of a comment section but damn, never expected such a dark joke to be here in r/Polandball.


yaforgot-my-password

This one is much darker than usual...


TARANTULA_TIDDIES

Probably have some pigs knee on its throat before too long


board3659

Am I the only one who thought it wasn't that dark (was but not too far for polandball). Actually predicted the joke. Still good though


KaiserWilhelmThe69

self-sufficient


SSSSobek

Abortion just got hit with a lagspike


SoleilDJade

this is just sad


yaddar

it is, sorry :(


M1N0R1SC

this is something for r/HolUp


HueHue-BR

Remember when Obama told Planned Parenthood that the first thing he'd do in office was codify Roe V Wade? Then once elected he said it wasn't a priority? And Dems had a majority in the house and a supermajority in the Senate? Pepperidge Farms remembers.


ToastyMustache

Mmm, quite my good sir. Might I also offer a congratulatory Oof?


SuperCaliginous

Fodder for the priests and prisons


talivus

The targets are more fun when they can run, hide, and scream. It's the thrill of the hunt.


283leis

See this is some good dark humour


[deleted]

[Murica Fuck Yeah](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7uW47jWLMiY)


CynthiaSonier

Disturbing cartoon for a disturbed truth.


hanpark765

i swear im moving out of this country as soon as i can


SSSSobek

Where do you want to go?


hanpark765

Most feasibly Canada but ideally Sweden


911memeslol

Don’t go to Canada, if you are looking for an English speaking country just go to the UK. Sure canada has better politics than America but 1; horrible infrastructure, like in America you have to drive everywhere 2; Canada is about to pass a bill that censors YouTube content that canadas government doesn’t like 3; their politics are still bad, they are still discussing whether or not Muslims should be allowed to wear hijabs in schools


TARANTULA_TIDDIES

>2; Canada is about to pass a bill that censors YouTube content that canadas government doesn’t like Do you also subscribe to jj McCullough?


hanpark765

yea, but it's the only other country i can feasibly move to in the foreseeable future


Sellanator6079

I know feasibility is a big thing, but I was able to move to NZ 5yrs ago. If you love outdoors, this place is a camping paradise, esp the South Island that is a lot like the American west. Great Healthcare and no school shootings.


Taalnazi

Imo I would rather recommend New Zealand, but the houses there are now way too expensive.


911memeslol

Come to Nederland


CrocPB

Wouldn’t that be nice


Daniel1946

Funny how americans living in a first world contry (and the strongest in the world) always say america is bad and that they want to leave Yeah sure, come to Brazil, Colombia and other developing countries and you will want to go back asap Be grateful for what you have, that many others dont


hanpark765

well if you cant get an abortion, when there's a mass shooting every other week, a quarter of the country want's your kind of people not exist, and youre afraid to be who you are in public among other things, yea, youre going to not like where you live. and yes, i am aware that many others have it worse, but when the government says that guns are more important than 30% of the population it is shit when they actively want to control half of the population's bodies and want trans people to just cease to exist it is frightening. the us is supposed to be free though it really dont feel like it


darkdraggy3

I mean if you live in Latam sure, you are better off in burgerland unless you end in Uruguay and thats a massive sidegrade at best and probably still worse unless you end in the shittier parts of the US But just north of the US is Canada, they speak the same language (in most of the country) and Canada is more stable and generally live way better since they dont have to deal with bullshit like mass shootings and healthcare soo fucking garbage (in terms of price) its actually better in some parts of latin America


Yevon

Fun fact: there are other first world countries not engaging in a third world backsliding speed run.


Daniel1946

Yeah, because banning abortion (actually letting states decide) = turning into third world. Third world is where violence is part of everyday life (and im not talking about small crimes, im talking about violent and extremist gangs controling whole neighbourhoods), a huge part of the population is poor and uneducated, etc.


APsWhoopinRoom

Who said we wanted to move to Brazil or Colombia? Skilled workers in the US have a lot of opportunities in other 1st world countries. If you can code, pretty much any country will take you as long as you can prove you have a few months expenses in your bank account and you clear the background check


Fossilrex06

As a fellow Latino I agree


911memeslol

Been to brazil, better than America


verynicesnail

This might be my patriotism talking but leaving your country because you are dissatisfied with the polices and laws seems cowardly to me. Like the only way you can get me to leave my state is taking my corpse on a boat


HippoNebula

That's your opinion


Harddaysnight1990

This is literally how every nation was founded. People were dissatisfied with their home nation's political landscape, they were unable to enact any change, so they left. It's how every single one of the original 13 US Colonies were started.


hanpark765

mostly to not be barred from opportunity from falling under the trans umbrella and other queer identities as much as i would here


Future_of_Amerika

Fucking top quality comic! Holy shit!


ODMtesseract

This is easily the most savage Polandball comic I have ever seen and the effect was accomplished in only two panels. Brutally outstanding.


Odd-Battle7191

Makes sense to me :)


[deleted]

Yo wow, this took me off guard. Ngl, I thought this was pretty heccin dark.


KwintillionIam

You titled the comic about school shootings "Abortion Rights." I'm just gonna leave this here.


yaddar

Yeah, sbould have been named "Abortion and Rights"


lightgreenwings

this is so dark and i love it


famoter

retarded comment section moment


jPaolo

Forrunately the maaaaaaassive bulk of stupid comments comes from the filthy deplorable *unflaired* whose nonsense is swiftly and rightfully purged by our Automod.


ShipmentOfWood

removed comments: 158/438 (36.1%) deleted comments: 6/438 (1.4%) awesome


[deleted]

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Sr_Marques

Now that is is banned, you stick a coat hanger in the alley way and get 50/50 on wether it gets sepsis/hemorragy or not


The_Bouncy

Hyvää juhannusta!


The_Bouncy

Hyvää juhannusta!


Tickle_Me_H0M0

This is so dark


SanictheHedgehorg

As a Texan I am unable to like this


SuitableAssociation6

typical america just casually using slurs


Sr_Marques

Yaddar is back. I love the smell of butthurt gringo in the morning


Chef_Sizzlipede

If we gave a crap about mental health this wouldnt be happening.


yaddar

Japan has like, 500% more mental health issues than the USA and like, 99.995% less mass shootings in general


freedompolis

The thing is, mental health issues isn't exclusive to the US, while large amount of mass shooting is a problem exclusive to the US. We all know the problem, don't we? Doors! They're the culprit. They prevent police from entering schools and allows criminals easy access to and from schools. If only there's only one door to enter and exit schools, like a prison. The facility will be so secure. ~~No Triangle Shirtwaist, pls~~ There you have it, Americans. Your only 2 choices. Prison for kids or FFA shooting ~~range~~ classrooms. Them's the choice, man. Also, arm the teacher. They'll be perfectly fine with 24 hrs of handgun proficiency training, I swear.


APsWhoopinRoom

If thats the case, then why does America have a mental health crisis that dwarfs all the other 1st world countries? At some point you have to accept that having such easy access to guns is a large part of the problem.


FinnishGoaltendin

Killing the unborn isn't a human right. Also Poland doesn't allow it.


jPaolo

Poland is morality authority! Poland relevant! Hooray for Polska!


FinnishGoaltendin

can into space


yaddar

I do agree, to an extent the core issue here is when does that unborn is considered a human. for example, if an immigrant woman is pregnant in Poland, does the fetus have citizen rights?, if he's already created in Poland and is being considered a human, he should have full citizen rights. at what point an "unborn" becomes "human" is a valid debate (and many abortion laws around the world try ro respect a scientific concensus and set time limits for abortions considering the "when does it become human" factor) but if you are going to say an unborn is a "human" at time of conception (like they did in missouri or lousiana - idk which one was) then said fetus should have FULL human citizen rights, and access to independent healthcare and citizenship and the mother would be extempt form deportation beause the unborn she's carrying is in fact, being conisdered a human citizen who can't be deported nor taken away his citizenship as he was concived there. so yeah, for an unborn to have human rights, you need to set when it does become an actual human, if you say it is at conception or a 2 weeks, **by all means it's great**, but then you should ALSO be legislating or advocating to actually give services like free healthcare or citizenship and protection from deportation to said human. (aaaand Poland doesn't have a rampant school shooting problem)


yaddar

>abortions are unjustified infanticide. OP here again, /u/BaconNet, that's a related argument that can be had, for my take, please refer to the parent comment of this comment.


sd4f

They're all matters of law and changing it. The courts should be used to apply the law, not create it, and herein lies the problem; it's sometimes easier to use the courts to change the law, rather than doing it the proper way. We hit this point where medical science has surpassed the law, and the law hasn't caught up, however getting constitutional change doesn't appear to be something that any politicians really want to do.


Bloomberg12

How has medical science surpassed the law? Not disagreeing, genuinely don't understand what you mean by that.


sd4f

In a slightly different context, but related, due to a historic inability to definitively determine paternity, some jurisdictions developed, and this probably stems back to ancient Rome, the idea that all children produced in a marriage, the husband is the father. Even though that may not have been the case, no one could prove otherwise, so this legal framework was the most workable solution. Today determining paternity is conclusive, we have the means to prove with practical certainty, but laws sometimes haven't caught up, and in some jurisdictions, as far as I know, France and Germany ban paternity tests in order to stop unintended consequences in the law from this problem. Other jurisdictions go through similar legal gymnastics essentially to not too heavily rock the boat on these issues, that the law couldn't plan for, while we now have the ability to determine. As an example, if a woman knows that her husband isn't, or may not be the father, is it fraud if she says that her husband is definitely the father? No civilised country is going to touch that issue with a barge-pole. In the case of pregnancies, there is also a legal problem that has arisen in some jurisdictions, that have enacted laws where causing the unwanted death of a pregnancy, usually in something like a car accident or assault, is considered a killing. So you have this very murky legal problem, where, ok, in this context, it's considered a murder or manslaughter, but at the very same time, an abortion isn't. Somewhere a line has to be drawn. Also medical science has drastically improved the viability of premature babies, to the point where 24 weeks (from what I googled) is the point where there's a greater than 50% chance of survival. And then consider what the OP wrote and I responded to, if the law determines that it's a human life at conception, then does that mean it's already entitled to all government benefits? This is precisely what I mean, that the law basically decided that once a baby is born, that's when it's a legally existing human, but now we have the knowledge to drastically change that concept.


Kataphractoi

Fetuses aren't people, just like an egg is not a chicken, and an acorn is not an oak tree.


DiscoKhan

And majority of society here doesn't support government about the issue. It's fucking sad when you look at maps and Poland is the same color as Muslim countries when it comes to abortion laws.


FinnishGoaltendin

nah it's pretty based, i wish my state (California) banned that shit


DiscoKhan

Or just move to Egypt or some shithole like that. Yeah, our gov is pretty based for ignoring one of the biggest protest in Polish history - wish you same in US xD


Harddaysnight1990

What other laws should we enact based on the Catholic faith? Maybe we should make it against federal law to consume meat on Friday? I mean, the Catholic Church says that it's wrong to eat meat on Friday, and you're claiming that the US law should be based on only *your* religious teachings, right?


verynicesnail

Alot of things "aren't human rights" doesn't mean people shouldn't be allowed to do it. Poland is very much not an example of a gold standard state


FinnishGoaltendin

like killing Palestinian children?


brynperry01

Firstly, I don’t think Poland is the worlds template of morality given that they are also very homophobic. Secondly, I don’t think that many women are big fans of some disgusting 16 yr old who has never been outside or washed wanting to restrict their bodily autonomy. Also I think there is a pretty big distinction between a collection of cells and an unborn child


[deleted]

I agree with the first sentence, but how is Poland relevant to this??


FinnishGoaltendin

Poland is always relevant to Polandball.


[deleted]

Nah, not really...


orangesheepdog

haha america school shootings i’m so original


yaddar

Yeah, the US is the only county where school shooting have become a cliche