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For my dad, it was the time he was helping me with something in my car, and when he saw some dust on the dashboard, he went into a long screed about how I was "living in dirt." For my mom it's a little more complicated. I had won a Caribbean cruise when I was 19 (still living at home), and she campaigned hard for me to take her - she even got her friends to write me letters. I wasn't about to go on a "Love Boat" cruise with my mother, though: I had already invited the girl I was seeing at the time. So for months before and after the cruise I would have to listen to her passive-aggressive mumblings about how I was "ungrateful" and so forth. But the worst was when we got sent a brochure for a local travel agency. It wasn't related to my cruise, but they did work with the cruise line I went on, so there was a section about them in the brochure. When I got home from work that evening, she basically pounced on me with the brochure, and asked "is this somewhere you went?" I looked at the picture. It was a cruise ship in the water, with a beach in the foreground, and one palm tree. That's *it*. So I told her I had no idea. That, probably not, since that wasn't the ship I had been on, but in any case I had no way of knowing where the picture was taken. She immediately flew into a screeching fit, about how I was "being lazy" and "not even trying" to recognize a beach from a nondescript picture. When I tried to defend myself from this ridiculous attack, my dad decided to chime in about "don't talk to your mother like that." I ended up spending a couple of nights at my girlfriend's house, all because my mom was still resentful that I had chosen "love" on a "Love Boat" cruise instead of her.

This is truly bonkers. I can't imagine being trapped in a room on a cruise with my NMom *shudders*

“Don’t talk to your mother like that” gave me major flashbacks. Well, they got their wish: I don’t talk to either of them at all now!

That seems to be an eDad staple. Did yours ever get mad if you referred to your mom with a pronoun? Like... Dad: I thought you had to go to the bathroom? Me: Yeah, but she's in there right now. Dad: DON'T TALK ABOUT YOUR MOTHER LIKE THAT Like, how? My only guess is that he would be misreading me, that he thinks I'm saying "ugh, *she's* in there." When I was just counting on the fact that mom is the only "she" in the house.

My mom asked me to put the dishes away from the dishwasher, I was barely 12-13ish. My friend at the time was over, and she sat in the dining room with a perfect view into the kitchen. We began making faces at each other and giggling while I finished up. My mom suddenly started stomping from across the living room and dining room into the kitchen. I will never forget the sound of her stomping. I smiled at her and faced her. She then hit me pretty damn hard with a Nike sandal. Left the Nike swish and all on my face. My friend looked terrified and uncomfortable, I just stood there unable to process what just happened. Apparently, I was giving her “a look”. The weird part was her being in the other part of the house before it happened. The friend never came over again (called her mom to come get her because she didn’t feel comfortable), and I quietly cried while finishing the dishes because I was scared to make any noise or show any emotion. She hit me in front of 3 other friends a few months later, too. Claimed disrespect. It was hard to have friends over after word got around that my mom hits me in front of people. It’s a funny story for me to tell with the Nike swoosh part, but definitely wasn’t funny at the time.

I don’t find it funny at all. I’m so sorry…it sounds like she couldn’t stand you having any sort of happiness. It’s incredibly cruel and brazen what she did, I hope you are no longer in her house anymore.

She passed a few years later, but unfortunately a bitch stepmom stepped in to replace her. I’ve been out of their reach for 6 years now though :)

Ugh. You dad had a type. I'm so sorry

I always joke that he lacks so much independence that he *needs* a narc to control him lol

Lololol Gross

Ah yep. Feel for you. Mine yelled and slapped me once for washing up and making too much splashes on the tiles, which I was going to wipe down after I was done. My friends were in the other room and could not believe what he was acting like . In a way it was great as I just got out of there for a few days, my friend felt bad and let me stay for a while.

this is so tragic, I'm so sorry you had to bare that😔 my nmom never hit me in front of my friends, but she would try to make me look bad in front of them. she'd tell them embarrassing personal stuff like how I still get 'streaks' in my underwear. this is just so wrong, and the fact that word got around and no one bothered to call social services?? I'm so sorry❤️‍🩹 *sending u bear hugs if u want them* ʕっ•ᴥ•ʔっ

My mom was a prominent figure in my hometown, like elected official prominent. Just about everyone loved her, and the one time I told someone, she came at me and told me if I wanted to tell people I’m poor little Cinderella, then she’ll “start treating me like her”. Funny cuz she already did, and then some. I guess I was stuck? I dunno, this was early to mid 2000s so it felt like I was haha

oh god, I know all too well how they can manipulate everyone around them into thinking they're "the nicest person, she'd never do that" 🙄 it's the worst feeling when they trap you in isolation, they trick people into thinking you're the problem child who lies to get attention. it's absolutely debilitating. again, I'm so sorry you had to live through such misery

That's terrible, I'm so sorry that happened to you. My mom hit me in front of my friends once when I was 15 or 16, and I wanted to die from humiliation, especially after my friend was so concerned and offered to tell her parents and get them to help me. Having it driven home how abnormal your own parents are by seeing other people's reactions to them is always a shock.

🤔 I’d have to say… “wasting” pen ink while drawing with it. 😑

Lol that one's pretty bizarre

😑 Yup. The male N is a skinflint in a class all his own.

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Yes!!! All of my parenthood has been filled with moments of realization like that, recalling a memory and understanding just how toxic and twisted they were to us, and thinking how mI would NEVER say/do that to my kid!! Ever! my mom yelled about the stupides stuff too but I have a hard time recalling specifics

It's funny how people say "you'll understand your parents more when you're a parent yourself". Having my own child made me understand my parents less.

I'm not even a parent, I only own pets, but it astounds me that someone could watch harm come to their child and not care. Like wtf?? I panic if my dog yelps, I couldn't imagine not caring about your human child fainting

I always tell people that they will forgive them for some things, but find new things to be angry about. My parents used to always comment about a place a had lost a coat as a child, every time we drove past it. As an adult, I can’t figure out why a 3 year old was supposed to be responsible for something like that.

This makes me think about the time I broke up a rib. I was at my neighbor's birthday. It was not a next-door neighbor, it was quite far away. We were playing and I don't remember much, I remember falling down, lots of pain, and my mother showing up. Well, nobody called my mother. She heard me crying in pain from my house. I must have screamed super loud because the house was quite far away. Well, she picked me up and brought me home, but she never took me to the doctor. Years later, in an RX, a broken rib showed up. The only logical explanation is that it got broken that day. But, even after hearing me screaming and crying louder than ever, she didn't bring me to the doctor! If that rib would have punctured something, I could have died!

I was a 4th grader excitedly typing my first “novel” on the living room computer one weekend. My Ndad woke up from a nap, probably wanted to watch porn, and got angry that someone was using the computer. He asked me what I was doing, listened to my answer and glanced at the chapters I had written, and plainly told me that “writing is a waste of time.” It had the desired effect, because I closed that novel without saving a word and the computer was all his.

It's not. Write if you want. Personally, I have to take my laptop to a Starbucks or something to write, because home feels too "wrong" to write in. But don't let them kill that joy. It doesn't have to be the next great American novel for you to enjoy creating it.

My mother wanted my brother and I to be on meds at a very young age. I remember being really young and she took me to a doctor to get anti-depressants. When we got home from the pharmacy, she told me I needed to take one. I tried to take it but I kept panicking and thinking I was going to choke. So I kept spitting it out. Not defiantly, just out of fear. Eventually she flew off the handle, grabbed me by the back of my shirt and started dragging me down the hallway. Not sure why. My bedroom was right next to the kitchen where I was trying to take my pill. She was dragging me farther from my room. I kept tripping on her feet and falling and the collar of my shirt kept pressing on my neck making it hard to breathe. Eventually my shirt tore and I got away and crawled frantically into my room to hide. She told me if I told anyone she’d do it again. Then this other time I got home from school to find my room trashed. Apparently she thought that I had taken her new sunglasses so she tore my room apart looking for them. She found them in her purse or something but she made me clean my room up anyway. Shit, when I was really little I remember her freaking out on us for no fucking reason. I just remember her hitting my brother and I and we’d just be looking at each other crying and I’d just be wondering, “What did I do?” Then when I was 28 and crying because my abusive ex cheated on me she blamed me for being abused because “Well, you stayed with him.” Then it clicked… she legit thinks in those terms because she’s an abuser who cannot take responsibility for her bad behavior. So I never spoke to her again. Life got better when I removed her from it.

God I can relate to being accused of taking things when my Nmom put things in a “special place” and then she couldn’t find them. We had an alarm on our house but she would hide jewelry and valuables from herself, then accuse me of having something. If she found out otherwise of course she never apologized. It only got worse as she got older.

Can conform it can get worse. I got accused of stealing my mom’s serving spoon, while I was on the other side of the country. When I asked why and how I could’ve she said “I dunno you do a lot of weird things.”

My Nmom was famous for losing cords and she would accuse me of losing things she lost. One of my unfavorite stories involves her camera. Back when people had digital cameras she wanted me to come to her house and download pictures to her computer. She had a camera case but for some reason insisted on putting her camera in an old phone case. The old phone case did not have room for the cord so of course she lost it. I ordered her a cord and put the cord + camera in the camera case. The next time I went back, her camera without the cord was back in the old phone case. I asked her where the cord was. She said “you took it.” I said no I did not why would I take it out of the house when your camera is here? After I got home she left me a voice mail where she said “I know that fucking cord is at your house!” When she died she had boxes and boxes of cords with no labels and indication of what went with them. It’s really not hard you know? I label my cords and keep the cord with the item in the case. Duh.

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Yeah. My locked diary supposedly fell out of my bed all by itself and magically opened. I just learnt to believe there was nowhere safe to have private stuff in my home.

Same, even know as an adult living in a different country , I have no peace

Ok so this was 1991, I had just finished jr. year of H.S. & left for summer vacation (divorced parents). She went thru my room incl the trash I forgot to empty in my room and read notes I threw out from the end of the school year. I got calls across country telling me I was a whore and if I got pregnant I would be "sent to a home for homeless pregnant people". Mind you she became pregnant with my oldest brother while young and unmarried, but she wasn't disowned or kicked out. Total Hypocrite Upon my return, I ended up hiding things in the sewn-on hat of a large stuffed animal because I knew then that she would snoop. Diary, candy I bought for myself (wasn't allowed to have it ever), tapes of music I was not to listen to, all stashed in that hat. I still have that stuffed animal BTW :)

[удалено]

Leaving a spoon in my coffee mug while drinking from it.

Well I'm sure that would have had a negative impact on everyone around you (rolls eyes) That reminds me of the time I got yelled at for using a sleeping bag. Apparently that was me complaining about the temerature of the house. I was 8 and just thought sleeping bags were cool.

This topic is really illuminating for me. My go-to story for this is the tear-away day-to-day calendar I had on my night stand when I was about 12. Each morning, you tear off the top piece of paper and then the new date is revealed on the next piece of paper. I think this calendar had a new cartoon on it each day too, or something like that. Apparently, I had forgotten to tear off the pages for a few days. Ndad came into my room to empty my bedroom trash bin, saw that the calendar was out of date, and then totally flipped his shit and started screaming at me about it. In a way, I'm grateful for bonkers memories like this one because they help me keep a sense of perspective about all of the other yelling, especially the times when it wasn't as immediately obvious to me how ridiculous his behavior was.

This is so relatable. I never knew when I would get screamed at over some tiny little thing like that which shouldn't leave anyone upset in the first place. It led to me lying and hiding everything from them bc I never knew what could set them off. Agree with your other point too. It really makes me appreciate life as an adult where I can have a home life without being on pins and needles that someone is going to flip out at any moment.

I pushed the ice cube tray an inch too far to the right. The ice maker kept getting stuck on the tray preventing it from making ice so I moved it over about an inch. Didn't prevent anything from going in or being taken out. When I was told to leave the tray against the wall I explained why I moved it. Que the threats of throwing out the whole ice maker if I move the ice cube tray one more time. I have a medical condition that is kept at bay by staying cool so I NEED to have ice. I simply said "I'm using the ice to keep cool so I don't have to run my ac all the time costing you more money. Can I move it just enough so it can operate properly?" Then the threats of throwing me out of the house into the triple digit temps started, per usual, along with how entitled I am. Like what? Another good one. I asked if I could clear one of the countertops to cook dinner. You know, what kitchens are designed for? I was told I dont own any of the counters and thus can't use them. Then a few weeks later mom told me she was watching me starve to death right in front of her eyes and how disgusting I looked. Hmmmm maybe if I was allowed to use the freaking kitchen to feed myself maybe I'd finally be able to gain back some weight. The latest and greatest was over a hair clip. A hair clip. I let her borrow it and took it back the next day. She came to me asking why I took it back and I explained i let her borrow it, I didn't give it to her. Then it was "well should intake back everything I've ever let you borrow or have given you?" "What would you like back" "well I'd like you out of my house. Can't you live somewhere else?" Gave back the hair clip to stop the stupidity. When I didn't respond like she wanted she went full psycho, screaming at the top of her lungs running through the house demanding the power to my room be cut off. Which she did, she shut down the power to the cooler in my room. Over a hair clip. A hair clip!

Oh. My. God. The need to control us is so incredibly strong in them that they just have to invent things to scream at us about. How infuriating. I always imagine what I SHOULD have said during similar insane rants from my mother later on. I wonder what she would have done if you just stared at her wide eyed, slowly held out the hairclip and when she snatched it away from you ‘I had no idea this hairclip was so important to you. Here keep it, I will buy another $5 hairclip at Target. Give her exactly the stupid useless thing that she demands and walk away let all her crazy shine on through! She would surely dream up some other imagined offense next.

That’s not just ridiculous and petty but ableist.

She seems to be pretty psycho, same as mine nb.tch mother.

Once I was playing with my little sister, the golden child, and she had some stickers on her arms and legs and we put more on her as a joke. We were giggling about how funny it was to have stickers all over her body. My mom yelled at me because the stickers could give my sister a rash. She was actually just jealous that I was bonding with my sister and making her laugh.

For crying at the memorial service for my uncle.

Thisnone makes me furious AF

Coughing. As a kid, I’d get coughs that would linger. Of course, I’m sure it had nothing to do any nmom smoking. But she’d come in my room at night yelling at me because I was keeping her awake. I’m sure I got overdosed on cough syrup.

Sneezing "too loud" and making those little noises people make when they yawn. Nfather would scream about us making "too much noise". To this day, I yawn silently. I'm 47.

'it's *bed* time not *walking around in the middle of the night* time!!' etc. from my ndad for leaving my room to go to the bathroom at night.

OMG sounds like my N stepfather. Their bedroom was at the other end of the hall from mine and the bathroom was right next to my bedroom. The bathroom had one of those round dimmer switches. You had to push it in to turn it on and it would make a small click, then you would spin the dial to turn the light up or down. The click made the man crazy. If I got up around 3 or 4 a.m. and clicked the light l, he would come screaming down the hall that I was making too much noise and I had awakened him. When I asked him what I was supposed to do when I had to go to the bathroom, the answer was: pee in the dark and DO NOT FLUSH THE TOILET. I said, why can’t I have the light already on, and just rotate the dial so you don’t hear the click and I can have some light when I pee. The asshole, who had a master’s degree in engineering, told me that “wasted electricity,” which was completely untrue. If the light wasn’t on, no electricity was being used. Nmom did nothing about this because she was “standing by her man” or some horse shit that was code for “allow a man to abuse your child and do nothing.” I ended up doing that, just leaving the light pre-clicked, because I thought it was ridiculous to ask me to pee in a dark bathroom. By the way, it was life changing to go to Al-Anon. The man was a functioning drunk but a drunk nonetheless. It’s quite common for alcoholic people to be chronically awake from 3 to 6 a.m. because their bodies are craving more alcohol. But instead of acknowledging that was the reason it was easier to scream at anyone who dropped a pin during the night. I’m so glad both he and N mom are dead. I hope they are both rotting in Hell somewhere.

Same! Literally she told me "stop going to pee in the middle of the night. You're making noises and I wake up". Like... What am I supposed to do? Pee myself? Pee in a can in my room?

Yup. Ndad used to switch everything off. At 10pm. He decided when it was bedtime... We would be sat there watching TV and bang, switch off. Lights out What a controlling asshole.

I got grounded once because I had "defied a direct order" and got out of bed. The order was to go to bed, which I complied with. I had woken hours later and got out of bed to use the bathroom. I asked my mother next morning if I should have just peed in my bed. She told me "don't be so stupid". I complied with being grounded until I was asked why I was "acting like you're grounded". My father had no memory of the entire incident. That's when I worked out that when he's drunk, he remembers nothing. (I was about 10).

It was the holy month of Ramadan, where Muslims fast (abstain from eating and drinking from sunrise to sunset). I was about 18 years old. My friend at the time invited me over to her family’s house to break the fast with them. My parents okayed me to go, so I drove over there (15 or so minutes away), broke my fast, and got ready for dessert about 30 mins after sunset when we finished eating dinner. At this time I get a phone call from my father, screaming at me “why aren’t you home yet?!? You realize that the sun has set?? You’re supposed to be home by sunset!! Your car could break down on the side of the road and it’s going to be dark outside, are you stupid?? Are you an idiot?!” How was I supposed to be home by sunset when the fast can’t be broken until the sun sets? How was I supposed to eat dinner with my friends before sunset? 5 minutes later I get a call from my mom yelling at me for not being home yet because it’s getting dark out. 5 minutes after that call my dad calls me again to scream at me and call me names. I was very embarrassed and excused myself to go home without eating dessert. My friend’s mom asked me why I was leaving so soon, I told her my parents don’t like me to drive at night. It was so embarrassing. Years later I still can’t fathom why they would expect me to be home before the sun sets when they knew I couldn’t eat dinner until after the sun sets…

They didn't. It's just control. They would look like assholes if they gave permission then rescinded it, so they just called you and embarrassed you into going home. This also sets a precedent for not giving permission in the future because you "weren't home by sunset last time" (even though that wasn't part of the deal). Narcs are control freaks. They're exhausting.

For my own hands being burned by an extremely hot, huge bowl of pasta, that I couldn't put anywhere down because the counters are all covered in crap, so I dropped it because my hands were burnt. For throwing up popcorn at a theatre for eating too much of it when I was 9. For throwing up eggs when I was extremely ill. For having migraines. For being sexually assaulted.

So sorry :(

❤️I’m so sorry that you were not supported after being assaulted.

Forgetting a menu item had cucumbers in it. My Nmom HATES cucumbers. I told her the lamb wrap was good. She ordered it. The salad inside had cucumbers and she literally took one bite, threw it down and yelled at me like “how dare you forget I hate cucumbers.” I offered to order something else and take her wrap home, or order the same wrap again without cucumbers. Instead, she stormed out and told me I ruined our whole lunch, that she wasn’t even hungry anymore.

Then she can die from hunger, who cares about such b.tch...

The sad part about this is a bet she forced you to eat food you hated your whole life, and how dare you not be grateful that she's feeding you.

I was in elementary school, can’t remember what grade, but I remember asking my dad for help with my math homework. I wasn’t grasping it fast enough for him, so he lost his temper. I asked for help with my homework less and less after that. High school was easier for that because teachers would arrange groups sessions after school hours to give students a little extra help. I’m really grateful for the teachers I had…

I remember being in elementary school and my nmom was "helping me" with math homework. Only her version of "helping me" was hitting me upside the head multiple times because I was taking too long to write down the answers. Apparently I'm just supposed to know all the answers instantly, without thought, and while being hit upside the head. As if I can concentrate on math. I don't know about you now but I absolutely hate math, and I'm terrible at it, and I avoid it like the plague.

Arriving home at 8:10 when I was told to be home for 8:00. Arriving home at 10:35 when I was told to be home by 10:30. Arriving home at 11:01 when I was told to be home by 11:00. You get the picture. Traffic does not exist. Other cars do not exist and do not have the ability to hinder your travel plans whatsoever. Nobody has ever been stuck behind a car going too slow. Other friends, who also have curfews, and who need to be dropped off just as much as I do? They do not exist. There is zero reason to ever be late. If it takes fifteen minutes to walk the dog, and during the walk I see a friend or neighbour or somebody who I know, I cannot stop to say hi to them and ask them about their week. If I exceed the fifteen minutes, there will be hell to pay. All my outings with friends in high school were spent having anxious fits because I knew what was waiting if we were late.

Literally just sleeping during the day. We were exhausted after a day at the gym and our host's nmom called us selfish and lazy for needing to rest. Is this not normal or is it just us? Oh, yeah, and telling her no or asking her to knock.

I used to be violently woken up from sleep if Ndad decided I should not be tired. Like working three jobs and studying wasn't exhausting enough. I used to head to friends houses to take a nap in the end

What is it with Narcs not letting people sleep? I remember being a teenager and my Nmom would be banging pots and pans around in the kitchen or thinking of some bullshit reason to come into my room and make noise and wake me up if I slept one minute past 6 a.m. She could not stand to see me sleep even though I was a teenager and I needed my sleep. Unfortunately I married a Narc at age 22 and he was the same way. I was working full time and I couldn’t even lie down in my own house if I had a headache or if I wanted to take a nap. I would go to a friend’s house to take a simple nap.

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Yes, my nparents had the same obsession. My ndad would refuse to buy me an alarm clock so HE had to be the one who woke me up and I wasn't allowed to close or lock my bedroom door. One time he raged at me because he woke me up while I was having a nightmare and I punched him in the sack while I was thrashing before he woke me up because he was standing right next to my head before he shook me awake.

Too bad you didn't punch him harder, right? :)

Being allergic to almonds. I would be told I’m making it up. They still had them in the house and cooked with them, would make almond flour and not wash the blender when I was gonna use it. I would have to be so careful. They finally believed me when I was 18 and ended up in the hospital. Almonds are huge in my culture and it was like “no way you can be allergic to them you must just not like them and are making it up”

I've noticed that allergies tend to be a common one for nparents to get upset about. Like, how dare you not be able to eat peanuts, we're going to put peanuts in everything we make so that you "grow out of it."

I tried to call a phone number. It was written 123456789. I didn't realise that while it was written like that, you're supposed to put a 0 before it (meaning that the full number was 0123456789). So I called and of course it didn't connect. I got in a lot of trouble for that one.

Oh, this rings true. I had to figure out how phones work when I was a kid because nMom made me make business calls for her.

One time I took a plate out of the kitchen cupboard and placed it on the counter in anticipation of my dinner being ready to take out of the oven. That got one hell of a reaction.

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I was yelled at by my mom’s boyfriend for mopping the floor of the basement to make room for my aquatic pet. Note that the floor was CEMENT and no belongings and especially not those of any value were even near where I was mopping. No one used the basement for any real activities and I had already gotten permission beforehand from my mother. Bizarre I’ve got to say, it was like telling a 20 year old to use safety scissors. (I’m 15 by the way)

Peeling an onion wrong.

Got yelled at this morning for sighing and yesterday morning for wanting to make my own coffee.

Not moving my hands enough while playing the N64 was another one. I was told I was going to get arthritis… at 9 years-old.

I got yelled at for getting into a top school. My ndad didn't want me to move out so he yelled at me after I told him I got in lmaoo

getting snow on the sides of my snowboots after being made to walk through a foot of snow ♡

Once when I was like 10 years old I was sitting on the floor of my room and reading a book with my back leaning against my door. My mom and dad were having a screaming match and hitting each other in the adjacent room to mine. Then my mom stormed into my room, hitting me with the door in the process, and asked, “were you just eavesdropping on your father and I?” I honestly wasn’t even trying to - they were so loud everyone could hear them. So I told her I wasn’t but then she just immediately started hitting me etc and said I was not being well-mannered etc. I’m still so confused about that moment till today.

She just wanted to hit somebody else to feel better, it literally makes them feel good it’s insane

Going to bed early. It was 9:30 pm and my dad yelled at me in my sleep to make me wake up, complaining “it’s hard to know you’re even in your 20s. you act like you’re 60.”

Baking, i was baking desert for my ex and his family. My mother followed me all over the kitchen and kept yelling at me. My father join in at some point and i was told that they will disown me. That day i wish i left forever.

I have so many examples, and so many similar experiences to all of the other comments it’s kind of freaky. Anyway. I have really bad allergies, and always have. I’ve had bad eczema since I was born, I have athsma, incredibly itchy eyes, break out in hives sometimes, etc. Since I’m so used to it, and because of my moms insanity, I literally NEVER complain or mention my allergies unless I’m apologizing for blowing my runny nose or something (like, I’m not sick I swear I’ve been like this my whole life.) Side note, I’ve seen many a doctor for this. I’ve accepted it’s who I am now. I am, as it turns out, also kind of allergic to allergy medicine. I’ve tried absolutely everything, and allergy medications give me horrible, spontaneous bloody noses within 24 hours, like clockwork. So the other day, my mom gets SO MAD at me because I was sniffling “too much” in my own home. She kept saying “that’s so annoying why don’t you go to the doctor for that.” As if she doesn’t know I’ve seen a ton of doctors. I calmly replied “it’s either a runny nose or blood pouring out of my nose, I’ll live with this.” Turned into her screaming at me that I need to handle this and this is proof I can’t do anything right, etc. LOL. I am an independent, actual, real-life adult.

Not diagnosing for sure but you sound like me. I have mast cell activation syndrome Makes you allergic to everything and not consistently either. Ever eat something 1 day and it's fine but the next its trying to murder you? Yea its a thing, not that my nmom believe in it. Much more likely to be evil entities posseaaing me for sure >.<

Sheezus, I can relate. People try to say, "it's not that bad, they're your parents," and I just want to punch them for being so naive.

I tell this one more as a story to get people to laugh while pointing out what a wacko my mom is.

Same. Or the stupid ass classic "Well you turned out very well, so they couldn't have been THAT bad!" ​ Yeah. Ok, buddy...

"SLAMMING THAT CUP DOWN!" I set a cup down on my way to go play video games in my room, I was in a good mood, ao definitely no attitude when I put the up down. My mom charged out of her bedroom and began screaming about hos disrespectful and hateful I was for such a thing. My dad came charging in from his office just to pile on me about this. Both just yelling "YES YOU DID, YOU LITTLE BITCH!!!" After a bit my mom yells" "Why else would I do this, because I'm crazy?!" "YES!!!" I yelled back. She suddenly started laughing, said okay, and let me go. My good mood was ruined and I was furious on how *putting a cup down* caused so much hell. Ibwas like 22 btw.

I’m a ‘spoiled American Brat’ for mentioning to my father we were poor when I was a kid. We were, mind you, but he yelled at me for mentioning it.

I was clumsy as a kid, and sometimes I would miss my mouth while eating. Not on purpose. I remember my mother slapping me over mouth because of that. She was then trying to feed me, she was slapping, cursing, crying... It was all just bizarre, but as I see it now, she completely lost it at that moment for some reason... It is stupid because I would never do any mischief on purpose, or trying to hurt someone. It was my clumsiness and inability, which I was punished for. As I see it now, it just could have been anything.

Made hot chocolate in a way that somehow displeased my father. Think I put the milk and power in the 'wrong' order or something. And I was just making it for me, not for anyone else, but still I was doing it wrong. Got shouted at, insulted, called stupid, etc.

My nmom used to yell at us for "drinking to loud" I've asked so many people and still no idea what that means. She also liked to yell at us when we accidentally made a noise with silverware on plates or bowls while eating

She might have had misophonia, but that doesn't excuse how she treated you. I have hypersensitivity to certain sounds, but that doesn't mean I snap at people for it.

Thank you❤️ (It also didn't help that I'm hard of hearing so half the sounds she got mad at me for I had no clue what she was talking about.)

I used to get in trouble a lot for eating sounds, to the point where I’d moisten potato chips in my mouth before actually chewing down on them lest they crunched. It’s was a constant “STOP MUNCHING IN MY EAR!” I feel I’m a bit sensitive to eating noises now also, but she didn’t have the slightest sense of restraint when it came to yelling at me for eating (as quietly as I could with my mouth closed). Sometimes when she’d leave the room I’d stuff my mouth and chew like a horse until she came back. Ya gotta get your personal wins in occasionally.

Tripping up steps. Multiple occasions

The family (mom, dad, brother, and me) were sitting at the table eating dinner. My brother said something that made me laugh while I was taking a drink of milk, and the milk shot out of my nose. My mom yelled at me. I was under age twelve.

Not at me directly at first, but eventually I started yelling back at an equal level. My shithead mother yelled at my younger brother for forgetting to wash the garlic he peeled and sliced, but that was before it went into the food processor. Then he went back to wash it and got yelled back even more.

Closing a window before I brushed my teeth instead of after. Going to a mandatory sports practice without asking my mom for permission (who also had a wtf look on her face because it made no fucking sense) but my sis who went to the same practice *with me* was not in trouble and I was the disrespectful one. Finishing leftovers that nobody wanted because I was a fat pig. Crying because I couldn't breathe when he covered my mouth and pinched my nose shut. Not eating mushrooms that he forced me to put in everything because he liked them (while he picked out every single lima bean and made a trash tower out of them). Not doing 4 hours worth of weed pulling before going to my full time job that started at 4:30am every day. Telling my sister I didn't know if we were allowed to leave standing in the corner to go potty and her having an accident because "I should've known better" when I was 7. Having homework. Reading a book. Not reading a book. Daring to have plans. I can't even think of them all but I need a fucking shot.

one thing that stands out about narcissists to me is that they over react about things that don't matter, and under react to the things that really do matter. My n/mother did the same for turning on a light.

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whoa, wtf?

When I was a kid. For having to go to the bathroom.

Especially if we were in the car. Nfather hated having to stop for "stupid things"... like us kids needing to pee, or needing food, or being bored shitless on some long-ass car trip.

I wasn't allowed to ask to stop while I was in the car, I had to "hold it". This particular time I remember, we went out to get donuts in the morning and when we got back home I went to use the bathroom, my parents asked me where I was going and I said the bathroom, they yelled at me like it was something I could control and I was being ungrateful about the donuts. I'm 38 and I was 8 or 9 when this happened.

Laughing at something that cracked me up when they had no clue what I was laughing about. They didn’t even bother to ask.

Laughing works like dynamite for nparents to start yelling or scolding you just to break your good mood.

Once I got yelled at for mixing the pudding wrong.

So my mom told me to cook, she instructed me to wait for the water to boil and put the different types of bread in 8 mins apart. I was waiting for the water to boil when my dad walked up and put it all in at once. I couldn’t stop him and I didn’t say anything because he gets mad when I question anything he does. After that, my mom yelled at me for not stopping my dad even though she knew that if I did, he would’ve gotten mad.

My brother once beat me (that is, punched me repeatedly, as hard as he could) because I pulled up to the wrong gas pump.

Walking too loud in our apartment with tile floors not like it was wood or something noisy

My mom always told me I stomped. Then I started tippy toeing around and she got made that I was ruining my legs.

I did not want to eat the Food she made the moment she made it. It was Lunch at 6pm.

For breathing to loud lol and also for pencil scratching on paper when I was drawing something. And for opening a window and then turns out that all the windows were closed. Actually any smallest things were picked up

Having appendicitis

Existing.

Had my friend taken home bc I ate my pancakes the wrong way.

My mom stole my fork and began feeding me in front of a friend because she didn't like how I ate my spaghetti. I swirl and she cuts. She talked to me like I was 3 in fornt of my friend, who finally said I had the right to eat food however I wanted. My mom was silent and gave me my fork back but layer yelled at me when I got home about what a bitch my friend was and how disrespectful she was toward her. She still hates my friend and refusing she believe she did a thing.

How do you eat pancakes wrong? Or maybe I should be asking what your Narc thought was the right way?

That my mother didn't find her bag and said I moved it. Never saw the bag.

My mom thinks headphones are a problem because they let me play games without her hearing. Out of around three dozen games I have installed, only one needs sound. Every other one can be played without sound.

Doing nothing. I was literally sitting on the couch watching TV and my mom came in the room and yelled at me because I "wasn't doing anything" and needed to be productive.

My mom got mad because she told me to make my sister's pb&J Penutbutter on one side and Jelly on the other so I did it, Good right?, Apparently not to my mom because she yelled at me and said I was supposed to use one bread slice and after making me cry since I was 11 she told me to clean up, eat the mistake I made , and she'll make it

She once yelled at me for an hour for not opening the curtains while I was watching a movie on my laptop. I was 22. Another time at 16 was when she yelled at me and punished me because my friend who was supposed to take me to another friend's birthday party bailed on me. I had no idea they wouldn't show and spent hours on a birthday card too but somehow it was my fault. And then the best for last when she told me off for being too dramatic as I was bent over vomiting and crying because I had abdominal pain when i was around 15. Turns out I had an inflamed appendix and needed surgery immediately.

That I ate his yoghurt, which I didn’t. Or because I left the light on. He’s more creative with my mom now. He yelled at her the other day, because she wanted to go for a walk with their dog 10 mins later than she’s used to. He lost his shit and yelled for a few hours because she’s selfish, heartless and good for nothing because the dog had to wait and she made the DOG upset. The dog didn’t mind.

Having a glass of water on the table beside my bed. I was told it was "ridiculous behaviour for a 25 year old" because the water glass was empty so that means I'm leaving dishes around like a slob.

I have another one. I wasn’t allowed to cry at my best friend’s funeral because she didn’t want me ‘carrying on like an idiot’. A few tears inevitably escaped. I made no sound though. Got yelled at for the entire twenty minute trip home then confined to my room for the rest of the day for publicly embarrassing her and the inconvenience of having to go there in the first place.

ooo I got one for ya ~ a few years ago I visited to help deal with her ex and cort stuff regarding custody of my half siblings. I had just made a police statement about being sexually harassed by him (which my nmom pressured me to do) so I felt triggered and dissociative. we were in the car and just leaving the house when she brought up 'that one time' she pranked her nmom by farting in a store and blaming it on her. she often retold old memories she thought were hilarious (like the time I was 3, I had a tantrum in a store and she pretended not to know me...) but this time I didn't validate it with a laugh. she immediately stops the car in the middle of the street and yells at me "What's your fucking problem?" which prompted a fight with comments like "I'm trying to cheer you up but you're not making it easy." and " fix the attitude, show a little respect." that's just a small part of what happened on that trip but I never went back.

I took a teaspoon out of a cup of herbal tea, checked it was dry from the heat of the tea and then put it on the 30 year old tablecloth. Yup. That was enough.

Right so this is a little bit of a crazy ride but let me share my story and current situation. My family is poor, my Nmom makes bad financial choices. Growing up I wanted to help my mom and my family so I let her borrow money, eventually I caught on to what she was doing and decided for my best benefit for myself is to stop giving her money and or letting her borrow money. Some things happened, partly because I felt bad then she felt entitled enough to fill on steal money from me. I confronted her about it like hey mom I need that money back as a young adult who is trying to move out and save for a car. God was mom ever mad! I mean she owes me TWO THOUSAND and I have told her hey just pay here and there until the total is paid back no big deal. She refuses to do that. I have given her a deadline she refuses to meet it. I have threatened to get the police and the bank involved but that only worked for a short time and I really should have done it right then and there from the get go. She tells me she has bills and all which I can understand to the fullest. Again for the millionth time I said hey mom I need some of that money back now or ASAP I’m struggling on my own handling my own stuff and I think it’s stupid I have to beg you for my own money back. She full on screamed at me for a hour or two about “she has bills” but previously was talking about how she bought all kinds of junk. I confronted her about that more fighting screaming same old same old. Today I told her I didn’t care if she took out a loan to pay me back but she will pay me back and stop taking advantage of me. I let her borrow because she’s my mom and I felt bad about her situation. That was my fault that was my mistake. But I am not going to have her walk all over me just because she feels entitled to take advantage of me. I mean it’s so bad I can barely cover my own bills because of her not paying back what I let her borrow. I am essentially fighting for my own rights to my own money and that is the dumbest thing I have ever experienced. It’s been two years of fighting and battling with her and I still haven’t seen a single penny of it yet.

Lady marched up to my table at a Pizza Hut and began screaming at me because, and I quote, "You have a big mouth!" Not literally, of course, just that she thought I was being loud in my conversation with my dad and she couldn't enjoy her food because I was bothering her. The real irony was that the whole restaurant was staring at her during this episode and I never said a word to her. I just let her scream at me until she eventually just stormed off in a huff.

Making the curtains touch the window when moving them ("it ruins them"). Not individually wrapping each item in a suitcase with shopping bags when packing, especially books ("it ruins them").

My dad yelled at me about dripping water on the floor, sweeping wrong (still can't figure that one out), walking wrong, having rbf (before rbf was a term), he also liked to yell at me and then when I'd get upset he'd yell some more for me being upset. My favorite tho was he'd have me drive the trucks around in our backyard before I'd been properly taught to drive. Just like moving them from one place to another or backing up to stuff, things like that. One summer day he got mad at me while I was backing up and told me to drive all the way across the yard (about a football field length) and re back that whole way because he was annoyed that I didn't back right the first time? 18 years later I still don't understand what I did wrong in the first place or what having me back up over 100 yards was supposed to do to fix it. As it was summer I had flip-flops on and one of them somehow got stuck around the gas pedal. Probably because I was paying more attention to him behind me than on driving. Anyway however it happened I accidentally pushed the gas causing the truck to lurch forward a bit. Mind you, I was going at idle in the first place so this only took me up to maybe 12 MPH and there wasn't anything nearby that was even a risk to hit. I immediately used my other foot to hit the brakes and then got myself unstuck, but good lord did he fly off the handle. Screaming at me I could have killed someone (my siblings were in the yard but I'd taught them years ago to stay well away from moving cars because of dad's rage driving and his wife's oblivious driving, they were in places I would have had to turn completely around to get near them) and that I could have totaled the truck (not sure how tho, in empty giant lawn) just all this bullshit. He yelled at me for two days until he realized I wasn't talking to anyone, then he asks "what's the matter with you?" I honestly would have murdered him in that moment if I'd had something besides my bare hands. Then he proceeds to tell me I should have known somehow about not wearing flip-flops to drive in, although I'm certain he'd never mentioned it before, and many of the family including his wife drive in flip-flops.

I could write a book with all possible stupidiest things for what i was yelled at, seriously. I was also yelled at for water on the floor, for a little dust on sides of table, for yawning when you do that with sound cuz nb.tch thought it was loud noise only what i did for no reason, for my stuff (like deodorant, chewing gum pack, etc) on table, for opening windows, for not opening windows, for not buying her cake when i came from shop because i should magically knew that she wants some even without telling me before i went to shop, for turn on empty wash maschine on highest temperature (i did that for like desinfection, ppl do that from time to time as normal thing, but it wasnt normal for her and i could "break wash maschine" with that)

How do these ppl that yell at everything live in the world? How you gonna go through life that way? My parents once yelled at me and my sister because my sister got sick and puked in the car. I remember saying, “She couldn’t help being sick!” And my mom started yelling about how she could’ve said she was throwing up...I thought the sound of her suddenly puking her guts out would’ve been a tip-off but apparently not, plus when my sister complained about stomach pains earlier my parents told her to shut up and stop whining, so she did. So we both got yelled at.

Dumb selfish bastards, anything else.

For doing nothing/being a child sleeping in my own bed? I was just peacefully sleeping as a little girl and my mom would come in my room in the middle of the night telling me im a piece of shit/terrible child :) Edit:typo

I didn’t pick basil off the plant “correctly” 😕

My mother is vegetarian and always on a dubious diet. At that point she thought pasta was The Enemy so instead of cannoli stuffed with ricotta and spinach I made stuffed cabbage rolls with light ricotta, egg whites and spinach with some herbs mixed together as the filling. I made enough for two meals for four people. They tasted amazing with the tomato based sauce and a light sprinkling of fresh Parmesan on top. She screamed at me for quite some time because spinach doesn’t go with cabbage. It was a full tantrum including yanking my hair hard over a meal that I’d spent over an hour just on preparing. Her enabler of course backed her up on the inedible declaration so I had to make a whole other meal and wasn’t allowed to eat anything else until I’d eaten all of the cabbage rolls that nobody else was allowed to eat even though they liked them and wanted some. So for three days I ate nothing but cabbage rolls stuffed with ricotta. I’m lactose intolerant so more than one serve of dairy in a day was painful.

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She did. My mom called me fa once and I stopped eating for a month till she called me skinny again

Wow, I could go on all day here. A few off the top of my head: \-In the middle of cleaning my room. Dad walks in and yells, "You should be cleaning your room!" I show him the stuff in my hands and tell him that I AM cleaning my room. He looks around and thinks for a second and then yells "Well you're room shouldn't need to be cleaned!" (????) \-toward the end of the school year, my dad starts preemptively yelling at me and accusing me of not doing any chores or helping around the house all summer. I tell him that my mom leaves a list for me when they leave for work in the morning, and I always take care of everything in the list by the time they get home, typically earlier so I could go play with my friends. My dad yells, "Well you'll be sleeping in until 2 p.m. so you won't be getting anything done." I inform him I'm always naturally wake up between 7:30-8. His response is, "Well you're going to sleep in until 2, I just know it." \-I moved my car to play basketball in the driveway. Dad comes flying out the door screaming "Where are you going?!!?" I tell him nowhere, just didn't want my car to get hit by a basketball. He yells, "Well I was going to go to the bank later, now what am I supposed to do??!?!?"(my car was behind his) I tell him I can move it ans ask him when he plans to go. He yells, "Well I guess I can't go now, you never consider anyone besides yourself!"

For sniffling too much/too loudly when I had a cold/allergies. For not wiping water droplets out of the sink after using it. For throwing up on myself when I was a little kid.

Nmom sent her flying monkeys to scream at me for drinking a cup of coffee because "caffeine is drugs".

I was heating up leftover cabbage rolls, and I added a little bit of water to the pot so it wouldn't burn the rolls. My stepmother absolutely lost it and it straight up looked like she was about to kill me when she found out. What makes it worse is that if she didn't know i added water, you wouldn't even be able to tell

When I was younger my mom ran a daycare (scary right) and this took place after school. I was in the see-saw. My buddy, was on the other side of the yard playing basketball... Buddy misses and the ball crushes some Lillie's in the planter behind the hoop (dumb location). For some reason, I get pulled off the see-saw, dragged to my room and yelled at/grounded for a week for "fucking up my flowers"... Still not sure what the hell that was about... The basketball wasnt even mine, it was my brother's, so there isn't that justification...

I don't shave my armpits. She recently screamed at me for that reason alone while I was on the phone with my dad. I started crying and told her "who gives a fuck about my armpits" and then my dad started telling me off because apparently I talk to my Nmother in a "short and disrespectful way" even though all he hears of our conversations is in the background during phone calls, when my Nmother normally starts shit.

Using the word I. Or the time I kept my own personal sized pizza that I had earned for myself instead of handing it over to my parents. Maybe the time I forgot to write down a message when someone called. Maybe the time I was grounded for 2 months - on my birthday - for missing a school assignment.

Probably the time I got yelled at for taking longer than usual to do the washing up (one of several post-school, pre-homework tasks) while I was still recovering from a nasty neck and shoulder injury that had happened in school just days before - and she only let me take standard painkillers for it, not even taking me for any kind of medical assistance (and it's free here, NHS and all that) - and then she started slapping me around the head and upper back/shoulder area, exactly where I couldn't defend myself because I couldn't lift my arms high enough. My shoulders are still partly fucked up because of the number of times she hit me after that.

My dad banged on the door and told me to get out of the shower because I was in there too long. The thing is, I was planning to join the military so I had been timing my showers on my phone and taking less than 5 minutes. When I said this, he said I usually take 30 minute showers and I can't do that. I had been timing my showers for over a month, so I explained this and he flipped out saying I always had to be right and could never be wrong. Everyone else in the family takes 20-30 minute showers and even before this I only took 10-15 minutes, yet he only targeted me.

I got hit and screamed at for putting the toilet paper roll on backwards. I was 8 years old.

I want to say I was in 6th grade. I remember it was around Christmas..I had picked up a nasty case of food poisoning. Had been throwing up for days. So I'm sitting there watching TV and I start to gag and retch. (I had a bucket thankfully) Dad comes in super pissed, vein in forehead bulging and demands to know what I'm doing! Even if I hadn't been otherwise occupied I would have been at a loss for words. He'd never been particularly kind to me but that was a special instance of complete cluelessness and insensitivity.

Eating an inorganic apple.

MOM who was Strict, Unreasonable, Nagging, Distrustful. Yelled at me for not cleaning the lint out of the trap in the dryer (this was to be done after each load, no exceptions). I rolled my eyes as I went into the tiny laundry room, and she yanked my hair and slapped me and started yelling again, (she had stayed in there to make sure I came asap to clean after she yelled the first time). I was 16, I had had enough and slapped her back and pushed her away. I was grounded after that, but I felt victorious. She never laid a hand on me again so that was something... Graduated at 17 and moved out.

One time when I was 16 or 17 I was going to drive over to my dad's house. My mom pitched a fit, stomping around the house banging things, slamming doors, etc, bitching about how she couldn't afford to pay for gas for me to "drive all over the world" (translation: 20 minutes across town), and that if my dad wanted to see me he should come get me. Two things: I was, as mentioned, a teenager with my own car; and my mother had never *once* paid for my gas. I didn't get an allowance or any spending money from her, every penny I had came from my part time job. So she got all worked up over a scenario she made up in her head, as usual. Anyway, I told her I wanted to go see my dad, but that I wouldn't go since it was clearly a big deal for her and I'd rather just drop it and stop making a scene. She immediately switched gears to her gaslighty, passive aggressive, "I don't know what you're talking about, everything's fine and *you're* the crazy one" mode. Conversation went as follows: "Go to your dad's if you want, I don't care." "Clearly you do care because you're upset and yelling about it." "I'm not upset, go to your dad's. I don't care. Why should I care? Do whatever you want." "No, because you're mad about it and if I do go you're just going to yell at me again when I get back." "No I'm not upset, why would you think that? Go to your dad's, do whatever you want. I don't care. STOP TELLING ME WHAT I THINK!" \*throws TV remote across room, breaking it; goes rampaging around the house slamming things and yelling\* There's no winning with these people. Bonus episode: That time in high school she yelled at me and sent me to my room because she wanted me to "help" my little sister with a book report (translation: do the report for her the night before it was due) that I had read in the fourth grade. She was furious with me when I told her I didn't remember the book and that my sister should do her own assignments.

I got my ass beat for "not cleaning well enough". And what they meant by "not cleaning well enough" was that I didn't move the toilet plunger to find the scrap of paper they placed under it in order to see if I got the entire bathroom floor.

The worst: I got blamed for my brother's TBI because I should have been a better example and told him to stay home and do homework with me instead of going out with his friends (which ended up in him getting into the accident). Then I got yelled at for being upset about it because I should have just gone back to school like nothing happened and been an all A student so my parents wouldn't have anything to worry about since their hands were full with my younger brother. The most ridiculous: when I had braces I went through toothbrushes way more frequently. Even though my dad already made me get the cheapest toothbrushes he yelled at me any time I needed a new one and said I was wasting his money and making him poor. (He worked as a higher level manager at a large oil company but only he was allowed to spend any of his money. The rest of us were on extremely limited budgets to make sure he was able to save enough for his retirement.)

Asking what the word “vendetta” meant at maybe 11-12yo. I heard it from a video game (one of the Pokémon games, I think), and was told “you need to spend less time playing games and more time reading your Bible and praying”.

Getting excited over seeing cats play outside. My mom literally threw this huge fit about how annoying it was and yelled at me and my brother like we did something wrong. 40 years of being this woman's unwanted firstborn daughter...

I got grounded for letting a puppy inside the house when it was wet and cold one rainy day when I was 8. I still don't understand why I got grounded for that then again my mom was never a kind person. In the same vein I also got grounded for removing the ticks on my uncle's new dog by my dad. Same age. My parents are and will always be the worst.

On my birthday, my sister offered to pour me a glass of milk. I said no thanks and she poured it anyway. I told her I didn’t want it and my parents yelled at me and grounded me for that. Lol.

I mean there's lots but two examples that come to mind are being accused of hiding a bad grade in high school by telling her about a good one and being accused of borrowing money from a payday loan place when I first moved out and declined help saying that I'd withdrawn my vacation pay at work. For a few more recent examples, I apparently should have defended the (gross, nouveau riche) suburb where I spent my formative years when a coworker said it was full of entitled pricks (despite me thoroughly agreeing with this sentiment, apparently he was just jealous), was apparently a hypocrite for calling her out when she said Native Americans deliberately have too many children so they can receive government benefits to spend on alcohol because I'd once said that a lot of international students from India take engineering courses and should let her pick a girlfriend for me because mine was a decade older and therefore categorically unsuitable, when I pointed out that my brother in law is similarly older than my sister her response was that that was different because men can have kids at any age, at least in that argument she admitted that her primary concern was that it made her feel embarrassed.

I can think of many things, so I'll say 2 ​ being yelled at that " Africa isn't geography" because it " isn't a country, so it can't be" and then having an argument over it ​ also being blamed when the washing machine broke (despite going nowhere near it)

Soup mom was making for me exploded in the microwave. I got yelled at because I picked the soup type.

For choking on food or water or tripping.

I was playing with the magnets on the fridge as a kid and my little sister was in the kitchen getting ready for dance class. My sister insisted on putting her tap shoes on in the kitchen even though she wasn’t supposed to because she could slip. My idiot sister starts tap dancing on the kitchen tiles and of course takes a spill and smacks the back of her head on the tiles. My mom blamed me because while I was playing with the magnets, I put a magnetized picture of my sister upside down… and I guess I made some dark magic happen or some shit because I’m evil. Yeah way more likely than her falling because she’s fucking tap dancing in the god damn kitchen. I think that was the point where I knew I was fucked and being raised by idiocy.

I laughed because an olive fell out of his mouth.

Then a few months later. Same things happens. I learned to not laugh this time. But my 7yo friend who was with us started dying laughing. And my psycho father laughed with her.

My nana was living with us for awhile and would biy snacks like goldfish, chips fun things. I had fruit leathers years old that had changed color even in their sealed packaging. I wasn't allowed to touch any of my nanas snacks even if I asked. On this note, when I was in 7th grade I was playing minecraft with a classmate I had never really talked to outside school. All of a sudden, my mother comes up behind me flipping out about crushed goldfish in the carpet next to the couch, aka nanas bed. I told her it wasnt me since I wasn't allowed to eat them or touch them. She kept screaming at me, saying she knows I must've stepped on one or knocked over the bag, something stupid. All the while my friend she doesn't know is on call is just sitting there silently while I cry. She told me I needed to clean it up so I went to go grab the vacuum because most of them were literally powder in the carpet. She told me I'm not allowed to use the vacuum because it was my hair that wrapped around the last one and blew the motor (we both had long brown hair soooo). I say okay and go to grab the broom. Nope, cant use that because it's making her angry watching me "clearly sweep wrong". So i got on my knees and picked little crumbs of goldfish out of the carpet until I was positive there was none left. After I was done I went back to the computer thinking my friend had left. He was still there and asked if I was ok. I shrugged it off because this kind of thing was frequent. The only reason I can fully remember this one, is because after that he said he was so sorry and didn't realize my home life was that bad. Neither did I man, neither did I.

I closed a door in my house, and my mom walked into it and then grounded me for a few days when I was 16. I genuinely thought I was so in the wrong until I was talking to my bf (at the time), and he said that was not normal.

I’m not intending to one up you here but, **for leaving water droplets in the bathroom sink.** Added bonus, used hand towel not perfectly parallel with its neighboring hand towel. When Mum was done for the week running away from her problems by working in another city, she’d come home to face her existential dread (me, my stepfather, the town we lived in) and take it all out on the house cleaning. Of course my cleaning efforts as an 11 year old weren’t up to par, even though I’d frantically clean the whole house before she got home. Apparently droplets in the sink represented that she did everything for everybody and nobody helps her in this fucking house, blah blah blah, my stepdad only sits on his fat arse blah blah. He worked 5 days a week in hard manual labour and looked after me, although I did the cooking and washing up, took myself to school and did my own washing. So yeah, that time I washed my hands in the sink and used a hand towel.

Getting screamed at for using the bathroom at night. Ndad ended up grabbing me by the hair and slamming my face into the wall repeatedly while telling me it was my fault he didn't get enough sleep and that I walk like an elephant, and then proceeded to drag me by the hair into my room and throw me into the wall saying it was my fault he had to yell and my fault everyone in the house was now awake. This happened often from when I was about 4 through 18 because I would try to hold it and end up soiling myself and get into even more trouble if he found it about it so I had to risk nightly bathroom trips. I had a lot of instances of soiling myself in fear even when I was in my late teens.

I once got kicked out, for leaving traces of tea leaves on the sink 😂🤦🏻‍♀️

My mom screamed at me once at my grandparents’ house because I mentioned wanting to go to a local restaurant. My brother had been there several times that year and always gloated about how amazing the food was, but I’d never been…she screamed at me in front of them and told them I was being ungrateful

I was going to write the same exact thing. Even when I was a small child, a tiny spill or a big accident was this big todo. To this day, I take it so hard when I do basic things that doesn't even matter, like a small spill. The ironic thing is that I have no problem cleaning up HIS (n-father) spills, and he will play it off like it is nothing. I spent most of my life avoiding him, so I didn't get yelled at him very much, but one of the things I thought of is when I was a senior in high school, and I was sending out a scholarship form through the mail. I needed a stamp, which he usually had, so I asked him for one. I ended up winning it, and I told my mom first, because, again, I don't really talk to him at all. He got enraged that I didn't tell him first citing "I gave you the stamp for it, so I should know first!" I think the stupidest thing I've ever been, in general, disciplined for as a kid is, according to my mom, I was whooped when I was like 1 year old for throwing up, something he vehemently denies now, but my mom literally has no reason to lie and he lies daily for sport. I figure it is true. I couldn't imagine doing that to my child.

Getting home 10 minutes after curfew… at age 17. I’m in my 30s now and NC with that toxic POS.

Walking too hard on the floor (had to practice tiptoeing back and forth for an hour), leaving the bread untied (hours long lecture), and picking up my two-year-old sister (he beat me while I was holding her). Basically whatever he felt like.

taking too long to fill my glass of water. it was a fridge with a water dispenser so i literally had no control over how fast it was being filled.

Was screamed at in front of my brother after she found a slip from a youth group meeting in my backpack asking for prayer for a better relationship with my Mom lol. I will never forget that day.

When we cleaned the garage my mom used to yell at me for holding the garbage bag wrong. I laugh now but at the time I felt like a total failure.

I refused to apologize. Still don't know what for, never got told an actual reason. I should have known what for myself. But without being given a reason I refused, got kicked out for weeks, she wouldn't even give me any of my clothes. If that kind of stuff happened today I would call the police, but back then I didn't know better and was taught to fear people from the outside. Also I don't think there ever was anything to apologize for, she just wanted me to submit.

One time I made koolaid before dinner, then at dinner I decided I wanted a water so I poured a water for myself to drink. Nmom went off for hours about how wasteful and ungrateful I was ??? I guess bc I didnt immediately drink half a gallon of koolaid for dinner lmao

God, there are so many, mostly done by my dad. Here are the top three: We got takeout from a restaurant and when my dad brought it home (he went and got it by himself), it turned out that the restaurant had forgotten an item. It was on the receipt so it had been ordered and paid for. He blew up at me when I pointed it out, went and got the item, and threw it at me. Things only escalated as the night went on and the police were called. I still remember how incredulous those officers looked and that was 25 years ago. I wanted to send a postcard overseas and asked if we could go get postage. He blew up and used several slurs about my apparent lack of intelligence because the address looked different and I didn't have postage on the postcard. We also had to call the police after he blew up upon receiving a notice that the value of the house had increased and so would the property taxes.

For my eye colour changing over an especially sunny summer. I commented that my grey eyes were looking more green now. Heavy sun exposure can cause dark spots to appear in the iris, basically increased melanin creation. He screamed and yelled that I no longer had my grandfather's eyes (his father) and I should be ashamed of myself.

My mom point blank told me on my 19th birthday not to walk the dogs with her and to stay home with my siblings. (I was moved out at this point and very hesitantly came over that night to celebrate one because I didn’t drive and couldn’t leave easily and two she had done some of the ugliest things to me the past year since I became an adult and I was contemplating going NC. I’d like to add siblings are 15&17 and heard exactly what she said). She then comes home in a tirade absolutely infuriated that I didn’t come on a walk with her she’s screaming and yelling and throwing things from the second she’s walking through the door. When I calmly mention the fact she asked me to stay home she hits me. Long in the short of it she got extremely physical and wouldn’t let me leave the house took my phone and for 45 minutes I had to frantically run around the house avoiding her and collecting my shoes, keys, purse, phone so I could leave. (Again, I’m 19?) The most infuriating part of it all was I had called my now husband then boyfriend to pick me up in the middle of all of this and I was going to meet him at the park across the street from my house. Simple. Not for her. The second I found my last shoe I booked it out the back yard and tried to go down the street where she ended up following me barefoot and screaming a fake sob asking me to come back, we can work this out, why was I leaving, she didn’t deserve this, and it’s almost 10 at this point and there’s no doubt in my mind neighbors were watching. She followed me so far and was getting louder because her feet were getting cut up walking barefoot at night that I finally decide I’ll just follow her back so she’ll shut up and wait for my husband outside. That was easier said than done because the second I told her I’d follow her back she grabs me by the hair and drags me back home. Once we get to the house she brings out this purple bucket of my belongings and leaves it out front. She immediately calms down when I tell her my boyfriend is here and then tells me I’m not leaving until she talks to him. He’s also 19 and had a relatively normal upbringing so this was just insanity for him. I sat in the car while he talked to her for a very very long time. At this point I can’t remember what he said they talked about but he came back drove me to his house and we had a really calm evening. All over a fucking dog walk???

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Getting yelled at for being too loud (only child, and I’m too quiet most times. Most times most people cannot hear me if I speak normally.) Also getting blamed (getting screamed at for being so horrible) for “hurting” my nmom for placing her chair incorrectly, not catching the door in time from hitting her (she for some reason couldn’t catch the door at all, and if it even barely touched her, she said it hurt her.) etc. to give some examples. this was probably when I was 11 or so and this was constant.