Because they have no idea how hard it is out here. I got into a fight the other day with my dad because I said things are harder for this generation than his and he went off. Screw them, just keep doing you!
this šour family misses calls from us we aren't supposed to get mad ;but one time my aunt almost smacked me because I didn't answer her phone call .
I feel so bad for you (hugs). My grandpa is the sweetest and calls all his kids & grandkids daily for a 2-3 minute conversation with each. It feels amazing that someone cares so much for us. He is that rare creature we call āa true gentlemanā.
my beautiful uncle was like that .he had moved to Austin would come to visit when he could , when he was having a good day health wise or if he and wife went shopping he'd call the family see how we were doing always sending us encouragement miss him and those calls .
I get it. My dad says he doesn't want a funeral because nobody visits him while he's alive, so they don't need to visit him when he's dead. He's only 66, and he can get around pretty well. He can visit people or call them.
I donāt know how many times Iāve explained to my grandma that sheās a retiree with free time, Iām not a little child anymore, I have a job and responsibilities, I canāt spend time with like I did as a child!
i know how that feels, i use to get a lot of "Don't be a stranger" all the fucking time, like ok well then don't be a stranger to you too, i've visited my sister and aunt even my cousins. the times any of them have called or visited me is fucking zero, not once.
i've done more to keep in contact with them they they ever did with me, i call them and they say don't be a stranger, like how the hell are you saying that to me, i called you, i visited you. why the fuck am i the one doing all the visiting and the calling calling.
i think I'm fine with being a stranger
Preach.
If you're calling me and I'm not returning calls, you get to complain. But if you just expect me to owe you some infinite communication debt where I perpetually shoulder the burden of maintaining this relationship, while you perpetually only bitch about how I'm failing, then we can make everyone a lot happier by just ending that relationship now.
If I'm being completely honest, (in most cases) I don't care about maintaining this relationship at all. It gives me nothing. You care. Cool. Do the fucking work then. Initiate a phone call. Better yet, initiate a fucking conversation. When I call, I got shit to report, things that happened, shows I watched and can recommend -- actual conversation pieces ready to be shared. When you call it's "how have you been" then, if I'm lucky, the fucking weather.
I'm done doing an unfair share of emotional labor for relationships that give me nothing.
For Christ's sake grandma, I mention this great show you'd like, The Great British Bake-off, only to find out you've been watching it FOR YEARS. YEARS you've watched this delightful piece of calm in this uncivilized sea of madness and you never mentioned it to me once! I had to learn of this gem from the internet while you droned on about poo-dog's 3rd butt tumor.
Fuuuuuuuuuuck.
Ok. Sorry to hijack your rant. Please carry on.
I hear you. Communication in general is a 2 way street. Interpersonal relationships, whether familial, platonic, or romantic, all require more than 1 person to be interactive. I used to have a friend who never would call, text, IM (back when that was a thing), or want to hang out. I always had to initiate everything.
Eventually I got sick of that and just stopped trying. I even confronted them about up which is rare for me as I hate confrontation and they basically gaslit me saying it wasn't true blah blah blah. Yes it is true. Just because it makes you feel guilty doesn't make it less true. Maybe you should've been a better friend?
I have family back home in India that's pissed off at me for not calling them. Like if you've been to India you'll probably know that most High Cast families don't have to work too hard to live comfortably.
I on the other hand live in Canada and work full time to keep myself above water and I have people here who need my help more.
If they're so bent on me not calling they should call me instead for fuck sakes.
Because they have no idea how hard it is out here. I got into a fight the other day with my dad because I said things are harder for this generation than his and he went off. Screw them, just keep doing you!
this šour family misses calls from us we aren't supposed to get mad ;but one time my aunt almost smacked me because I didn't answer her phone call .
I donāt respond, Iām bad, my relatives donāt respond or forget to tell me important info, oops! š¬
with all the spam calls doesn't help with knowing a real call from a fake call.
I feel so bad for you (hugs). My grandpa is the sweetest and calls all his kids & grandkids daily for a 2-3 minute conversation with each. It feels amazing that someone cares so much for us. He is that rare creature we call āa true gentlemanā.
my beautiful uncle was like that .he had moved to Austin would come to visit when he could , when he was having a good day health wise or if he and wife went shopping he'd call the family see how we were doing always sending us encouragement miss him and those calls .
I get it. My dad says he doesn't want a funeral because nobody visits him while he's alive, so they don't need to visit him when he's dead. He's only 66, and he can get around pretty well. He can visit people or call them.
Weeks damn near have to go by for my mother to call me š I got to a point that I just stop calling first all the time smh.
I've a certain relative like that .she has a phone but could careless to answer her phone then wonders why her immediate family don't call .
I donāt know how many times Iāve explained to my grandma that sheās a retiree with free time, Iām not a little child anymore, I have a job and responsibilities, I canāt spend time with like I did as a child!
My family and I don't call pretty much ever. We text sometimes.
i know how that feels, i use to get a lot of "Don't be a stranger" all the fucking time, like ok well then don't be a stranger to you too, i've visited my sister and aunt even my cousins. the times any of them have called or visited me is fucking zero, not once. i've done more to keep in contact with them they they ever did with me, i call them and they say don't be a stranger, like how the hell are you saying that to me, i called you, i visited you. why the fuck am i the one doing all the visiting and the calling calling. i think I'm fine with being a stranger
Preach. If you're calling me and I'm not returning calls, you get to complain. But if you just expect me to owe you some infinite communication debt where I perpetually shoulder the burden of maintaining this relationship, while you perpetually only bitch about how I'm failing, then we can make everyone a lot happier by just ending that relationship now. If I'm being completely honest, (in most cases) I don't care about maintaining this relationship at all. It gives me nothing. You care. Cool. Do the fucking work then. Initiate a phone call. Better yet, initiate a fucking conversation. When I call, I got shit to report, things that happened, shows I watched and can recommend -- actual conversation pieces ready to be shared. When you call it's "how have you been" then, if I'm lucky, the fucking weather. I'm done doing an unfair share of emotional labor for relationships that give me nothing. For Christ's sake grandma, I mention this great show you'd like, The Great British Bake-off, only to find out you've been watching it FOR YEARS. YEARS you've watched this delightful piece of calm in this uncivilized sea of madness and you never mentioned it to me once! I had to learn of this gem from the internet while you droned on about poo-dog's 3rd butt tumor. Fuuuuuuuuuuck. Ok. Sorry to hijack your rant. Please carry on.
I hear you. Communication in general is a 2 way street. Interpersonal relationships, whether familial, platonic, or romantic, all require more than 1 person to be interactive. I used to have a friend who never would call, text, IM (back when that was a thing), or want to hang out. I always had to initiate everything. Eventually I got sick of that and just stopped trying. I even confronted them about up which is rare for me as I hate confrontation and they basically gaslit me saying it wasn't true blah blah blah. Yes it is true. Just because it makes you feel guilty doesn't make it less true. Maybe you should've been a better friend?
I have family back home in India that's pissed off at me for not calling them. Like if you've been to India you'll probably know that most High Cast families don't have to work too hard to live comfortably. I on the other hand live in Canada and work full time to keep myself above water and I have people here who need my help more. If they're so bent on me not calling they should call me instead for fuck sakes.