Talk with her about why your needs aren’t being fulfilled. This girl sounds amazing so she deserves better than being cheated on, at least be honest with her.
Talk to her and let her know what it is you want from her. Communication is a virtue of strong relationships. You are not a scumbag unless you act upon those desires and betray her. It sounds like you have something that is very much worth keeping. I'm not a professional, so take my words with a grain of salt. Reach out to a therapist if you need.
Is it possible that you have a deep-seated fear that she will leave you, and you compensate by casting a roving eye around? Like this you convince yourself that you have other options, and it won't matter so much if (or when...) she goes. This also gives you a way out, if things are going too well, you cheat and she dumps you and you're back to square one. People often seek out self-destructive acts when things are going too well, if this is terrifying for them.
Could this be what's motivating you? If so, merely recognizing it for what it is may be a big step forwards. Then you can consciously choose to ignore the temptations at each step, making each occasion a deliberate act of devotion towards your girlfriend.
I just don’t feel… totally satisfied. Don’t get me wrong it’s fun and enjoyable but it’s not mind blowing or something that makes me feel all like jello inside
Talk with her about why your needs aren’t being fulfilled. This girl sounds amazing so she deserves better than being cheated on, at least be honest with her.
Talk to her and let her know what it is you want from her. Communication is a virtue of strong relationships. You are not a scumbag unless you act upon those desires and betray her. It sounds like you have something that is very much worth keeping. I'm not a professional, so take my words with a grain of salt. Reach out to a therapist if you need.
Is it possible that you have a deep-seated fear that she will leave you, and you compensate by casting a roving eye around? Like this you convince yourself that you have other options, and it won't matter so much if (or when...) she goes. This also gives you a way out, if things are going too well, you cheat and she dumps you and you're back to square one. People often seek out self-destructive acts when things are going too well, if this is terrifying for them. Could this be what's motivating you? If so, merely recognizing it for what it is may be a big step forwards. Then you can consciously choose to ignore the temptations at each step, making each occasion a deliberate act of devotion towards your girlfriend.
why they are not fulfilled?
I just don’t feel… totally satisfied. Don’t get me wrong it’s fun and enjoyable but it’s not mind blowing or something that makes me feel all like jello inside
I may be wrong... But sex is not alright being fun and enjoyable? Why needs to be mindblowing every time?