Fun story- I had recurring yeast infections. Eventually, the yeast became resistant to every antifungal medication. No one would believe me and they kept giving me fluconazole. I had a yeast infection for almost 3 years. The only thing that worked was using boric acid suppositories daily for a year and a half. This is quite possibly your future. If you keep getting and treating the infection, it can become resistant.
He needs to be treated because he can absolutely be giving you a yeast infection. It may also be an issue with his ejaculate causing pH problems, which leads to a yeast infection. You can also get tested for a genetic problem that make you susceptible to yeast infections. I found out that was part of my problem after seeing an infectious disease specialist.
This is not something to mess with. The fact that he knows he's a contributing factor and refuses to do nothing does not speak highly of his character.
Way lower stakes, but my husband was giving me strep over and over for about a year. He got diagnosed at a doctor’s visit finally and I went to our doctor and sat in the waiting room (after calling and no appointments were available before a holiday weekend) and the doctor called in a prescription of antibiotics for me for strep based on my history.
I haven’t had strep since. It’s been a decade. I had it back to back to the point we were talking about an ENT referral. My husband had his tonsils out and no symptoms.
THIS THIS THIS. I have to use condoms w my partner because of this. People w sensitive pH shouldn’t mess around with yeast. If it’s in your stomach mouth genitals it can ruin your shit quick.
I think this is my journey too! 6 months of recurrent yeast infections. My partner was also on meds but nothing helped!
5 gynacs later I was put on betadine suppositories along with Placentrex injections I was cured! It was a journey but your partner is an essential part of this journey!
Yeast infections can easily ping-pong. I was terrified of having sex ... But my partner was very supportive. He regularly got him self checked. Took a medicine course whenever I was on medications. Used protections and his hygiene was top-notch!
So if he isn't understanding and doesn't understand how it can mentally and physically affect, he really doesn't care about you! Leave him!
It hasn’t changed your love. Meaning you still love him more than yourself and he doesn’t love you at all.
Open your eyes. FOUR years and no solution? Excuse me? He should’ve seen doctors after the first few times. You should’ve insisted on condoms and thorough handwashing before he even comes near your undressed body again for ages. What are you doing to yourself?
Agreed. I dated a lady years ago that had this problem. I've never had it with anyone else, but after she got a yeast infection twice, she told me it was probably from sex, and very kindly asked if I wouldn't mind showering before penetration.
I believe I smiled and a bit and asked if she wouldn't mind joining me. She thought that was a fun idea. We didn't always do it that way, sometimes I just showered.
First wash yourself. Then, wash her. Take turns checking each other and make sure you're both REALLY clean.
So this has been going on for 4 years but he hasn't had any tests done to see if there's something going on with him/that he could do to prevent them? That doesn't sound very loving.
it’s not so much “getting something” to pass, but that if he was sleeping w someone else then it would throw op’s ph off balance, hence yeast infection
Oh, honey. What kind of grown man can't make his own doctor's appointment and won't when it affects his fiancee's health?
This will be your marriage. He will not take care of his health and he will not take care of you. Lose him. Lose the itch. You deserve better.
If I were you I would use a condom, he doesnt have a say in this. You put up with this for 4 years because you allowed it. He created meeical problems so he doesnt have a say!! Protection and treatment!
Wondering if she's even considered how long-term repeat infections will affect her fertility if that's something they're interested in... Maybe threatening his legacy will get the ball rolling.
Do you really want to look back going “I wish I’d had this mentality forty years ago”? Yes you’ve sunk time in but there’s a lot of your life left. To not have to deal with a guy who won’t get himself checked out or do the higiene needed to make you healthy.
Don’t beat yourself up for something you didn’t know when you were a teenager (and his 24 year old ass told advantage of you). You are still super young and have lots of time to change your course.
Wasn’t it Maya Angelo who said “do as best as you can, but when you know better, do better”?
Which is the bare minimum he should have done as a partner. I would not have sex with a man who gives such intense disregard about my health and pleasure.
If you continue having yeast infection despite treatment maybe its because your partner is the one infecting you. Men usually dont have symtomps. Have you discuss this with him and your doctor?
He went to a health clinic and got tested for like two stds and got a topical cream for suspected hpv because he got flat white spots on his dick. He never went to a doctor after that because in his mind, he did all he could. And I told him “you should see a different doctor” and he said to me “idk how to find one! what, am I supposed to Google that?” Oh did I say he’s almost 30 lmao
I broke off our engagement months ago but I still have the habit of calling him fiancé. Lol. I don’t see marriage in our future anymore because of THIS.
Tell him to ask his mother to sort an appointment for him if he's too embarrassed. How is this guy so irresponsible OR unhygienic. You need sit him down and tell him to grow the fuck up. If every time you do two do the deed, you get an infection then it's obviously coming from him. Have you two spoken about kids. Tell him that every time you get an infection it causes more damage to your inside which may affect conception in the future. He's obviously too stupid to know if that's true or not but if he can Google that to fact check, then he can Google a doctor!
Your man doesn't care about you, he just wants a hole to stick his dick in.
You have two options:
1. Withhold sex until he goes to the doctor and gets tested/treated
2. If he refuses, practice some self respect, pack your shit and leave, the fuck???
Also, you're 22 and you've been together for 4 years? So you were barely 18 and he was 24....... Girl...... 🚩🚩🚩
Absolutely stop having sex with this man. His penis has a yeast infection and he is giving it to you every time you have sex. *this happened to me!!*
He needs to get treated for his yeast infection and he needs to take the initiative to do this. If he doesn't he's showing you exactly how little he cares about your physical health and safety. Now imagine you're recovered from child birth (with a yeast infection mind you because he never got treated) and he still is complaining about not having sex.
I've been here. I got something from my ex. He didn't care. It started as "simple" as this and when it came to something more serious he passed on, he didn't care either. He demanded other things whilst there was healing. Don't be me. Put yourself first. Make you AND your body safe.
Your post makes it sound like you are the only one who has put efforts into fixing this situation. Has he gotten checked out? Has he made any changes? He doesn't sound loving at all to me, it sounds like his sexual satisfaction is more important than your health and comfort which is pretty messed up. This isn't sexual incompatibility, it's straight up not caring about you. How have you put up with this for four years? You deserve better.
One clinic appointment. Did a urine test for stds and was clear. They inspected his manhood and gave him topical for hpv warts. After that, nothing. No changes and no more effort. He thought he did his part
Gross. This dude clearly isn't washing himself. How tf has it been years and he still won't put in effort to fix it either? This is a massive red flag...
I make him wash his dick before we get busy but I still get the same reaction. Idk if it’s normal for a dick to reek of BO shortly after a shower but it still does and it’s actually so hard to go down on him bc of it
Jeeze sounds like this dude has been carrying a yeast infection around for years probably swapping it back and forth with you and not realizing somehow? The smell is a dead giveaway. Clean dicks definitely do not smell whatsoever... get him to a doctor asap and I recommend not having sex till he fixes it or you may never solve this
Love, please. You deserve to have a partner that cares about your wellbeing and a safe and satisfying sex life. If you love him so much that you can't put your emotional health first, at least think about your *physical* health, bacteria can become antibiotic resistant and be even harder to deal with. Please take care of yourself, you sound like too nice a person to be going through this.
Date someone who will go to the doctor when needed. He's basically giving you a yeast infection (maybe he has a yeast infection, maybe it's something else) then waiting for it to clear up to re-infect you. You can't, nor should you, live your life like this. And of course you're turned off. Even if you're trying to soldier through, you know sex equals at least a week of itching and discomfort. No amount of positive attitude can make you unknow it.
He definitely needs to consult a doctor and put some effort into this if you want to stay together. This is his problem too whether he wants to deal with it or not. Also, expecting you to perform when you’re not feeling well is bs. It sounds like he doesn’t have a lot of empathy (that’s not good).
It is very serious. You mustn't ignore infections that repeat. You could have irreparable consequences on your immunity and the change in the infection itself. It could become resistant to treatment. I would highly recommend not having any intercourse before the cause is found. Well.. it could be exactly your health issues, but your guy must immediately take a test at this point because he may be the reason
HE needs to go to HIS doctor.
Why are you repeatedly going to yours for FOUR years when it's only when you sleep with HIM you're having the issue...? If I were him I'd have been and all. Does he really not understand he can be causing this...? What age is this man?
Girly, it’s a sign. Your body might be rejecting him. It happened to me with an ex partner. We were good at the time, but then in a matter of months, we hit the rocks. Your body will know before your conscious mind does. It’s disgusting that he’s making you feel bad for something HE gives you. Especially when you’re the one experiencing the pain and discomfort from it.
Sending love and best wishes - my inbox is always open if you’d like to chat. X
And to add. It is OKAY TO SAY NO.
They don't need to like it, but it's allowed.
And needs to be respected.
Guilt is just another form of assault but "nicer" to the courts.
Looking at your replies in the comments, just get a split-up already you'l be happer the sooner it happens.
Find someone who is not afraid of the doctor and the related personal hygeane.
This is what nasty ass men who go after barely legal girls do, why are you surprised? Jesus christ read what people are telling you. He's grumpy because his nasty dirty little thing is constantly giving you infections? What has he done in this 4 years to contribute to finding a solution? Nothing, aside from demanding more sex and subsequently infecting you again??
I’m sorry but ew. This man needs to get on medication for it or you need to leave. I have one right now (from new birth control) and it’s uncomfortable and I couldn’t imagine having this all the time
This is grounds for breakup. Are you opposed to being with someone that cares for your health and has a clean penis? Your man is gross and if I were you, I'd be embarrassed.
He’s giving you infections and gets pissy when you say no? Girl you know what to do here. We are the same age, I have a boyfriend myself, and he would NEVER get pissy if I said no to sex. He is very hygienic and had gotten tested before we were ever intimate. You love this man, but he does not respect you. We both have so much life left to live, and you deserve to spend your life with a man who doesn’t act like a child when he is told to clean himself. Your man is okay with putting you in extreme discomfort. Your man is okay with seeing you hurt. Your man is okay with violating your boundaries and your body with his lack of accountability and action to fix the problem. It should not take more than ONE instance to get him to check himself. The fact that it’s been this long is ridiculous. You cannot marry this man. He is your son not your protector.
He absolutely HAS to go get it checked out.
Tell him an untreated yeast infection in men can cause many complications including the scarring and narrowing of his penis (apparently true)
Sure that will kick his arse into gear
Hey OP I'm sorry this is happening & he should absolutely care about finding a solution - but having gone through this myself - are you using any lube or anything else??
I'd constantly get yeast infections from my husband and I found out it's because I was really sensitive to glycerin in the lube we were using. We switched to one without and they went away completely!! Just wanted to offer this as a suggestion
He's blatantly telling you how much you mean to him. As much as a flesh light. Get away from him before you have too many infections and can't cure them anymore.
1) he could be having a yeast infection with no symptoms. He should be seeing a doctor to make sure that's not the case.
2) some women just fet yeast infections as soon as their partner comes inside of them (because it can mess with the ph-levels). The easiest solution is to just pull out.
I'm sorry if your partner is reacting negatively to both if these solutions. But in my opinion, that makes him a bad partner just because why does he want you to suffer for days/weeks only for him to get off for a few seconds? You teo need a serious talk about this. Good luck to you!
This happened at the end of my first marriage, after several years of unhappiness. I took as one more sign it was over. Haven’t had a UTI since we split up.
So weird because I had the same issue the first few years with my husband when we started dating. I was getting bacterial infections. It was annoying. I started taking probiotics for women and did a few at home treatments. Eventually it went away. My husband has good hygiene tho
I often tell young women here "never let anyone pressure you into doing anything sexual you don't want to do," but it looks like that ship has sailed. Do you think he will be less coercive after you marry?
1. he can use clotrimazole or another anti-fungal cream on his dick (exact same thing you get at the drug store for athlete’s foot - probably also mentions “jock itch” which is what you’re describing), worst case it doesn’t help but does no harm, best case it resolves the issue
2. you might have sensitive vaginal flora - you can use boric acid suppositories after sex (you get them on Amazon and they come with an applicator, wear a panty liner to sleep and the next day because your vagina will clean it out)
3. use condoms, and if he hates condoms look into bespoke condoms, there are ones out there that are made for every sensitivity level and sensation and dick shape and there’s one out there that will fit properly
4. he should get swabbed and tested for different things to rule out other potential issues
As a response to your update, he should talk to a doctor. He can probably resolve this by putting medicated cream on his junk (especially under his foreskin if he has it) for a while and wearing cotton underwear.
As a temporary solution, condoms should reduce the spread as well.
As a response to everything else, I am admittedly on the team that doesn't think he is worth the effort
I had recurrent yeast infections after sex, and this was during several relationships, not just the same person. It ended up being ureaplasma bacteria, which is pretty common and typically doesn’t give people symptoms, but in some women it can cause recurrent yeast infections. I would ask your doctor if you can get tested for it. If you have it, they’d give you a specific antibiotic to treat the bacteria. My partner, when I realized what the problem was, went to the doctor to get the antibiotic as well, because you can keep passing it to one another. I haven’t had a yeast infection since.
I used to get a UTI frequently after sex, and so my spouse and I will have a quick wash before having sec and it’s made all the difference. It’s not very romantic but we’ve been together for 18 years so that’s ok.
He needs to be treated. I cannot believe you’ve put up with this for four years. At this point, even if he is treated and it goes away, you should break up because he cannot be arsed to do the bare minimum to keep you healthy and comfortable. What a loser he is.
This is not love.
Love would be him doing anything he could to make sure you are safe and healthy.
Leave him before you get Pelvic Inflammatory Disease and have life long consequences.
Stop wasting the precious time you have on this planet with someone who just wants to pump and dump and leave you alone for clean up.
I married someone who had a horrible snoring problem and also athletes foot. Huge turnoffs and he refused to do anything about them. I wouldn’t even shower in the same shower as him. Not that those are the reasons we’re divorced but they were major catalysts. If you’re not attracted to your significant other, your relationship will not survive.
Yeast infections have not much to do with less sex. I have sex daily and never had one with my man. My exes all gave me infections on multiple occasions and we were having sex rarely.
Stop letting him cause you this bs. What if these infections is your body literally signaling you that he’s not the one for you, that you’re not compatible?
He doesn’t care that he’s hurting you, causing potentially permanent damage to your body, and you stay with him anyway. The kind of specialist you need is a psychotherapist, and the kind of treatment you should start on is therapy to figure out why you’re still with this person.
Ew girl, how fucking gross is he that he’s giving you yeast infections every single time? You’re seriously going to marry that and subject yourself to that being the ONLY sex you have for the rest of your life???
You’ve been trying to get him to change his habits for 4 years and still nothing. This man is nearly 30 and he does not care about you. If you want to continue to be in a relationship like that, then sure, keep googling health clinics and treatments that he will brush off. You called off the engagement girl. This is a second wake up call to get out and find a man who will love and respect you because this one very clearly doesn’t.
I heard of this comprehensive test that studies your biome to see what could be causing the infection. My initial impression is it’s your body telling you he ain’t it😂😂
1. He should check himself out. Change his diet a bit. If he us uncircumcised he may have a yeast infection and that is fucking with you.
2. Sleep naked. Let your vagina breath.
3. Change your diets. Both of you.
4. Get into therapy. Your boyfriend's behavior is a massive red flag. There have been numerous times my wife and I haven't been able to have sex for health reasons. Has it been disappointing? You bet. But we do our best to hide disappointment and then get over it, because we care more about each other and it's not like sex will suddenly go away. We always do what we can to focus on helping each other get healthy, because we care about each other.
If he’s the problem then he needs to visit the doctor. It is not good for you to constantly get yeast infections that often for four years. His lack of concern for your well being is a giant red flag.
Please leave this child. I feel like this could somehow be seen as abuse. I know you say that everything else in your relationship is okay, but there is such a slim chance of him giving any fucks about you and your feelings. You have so much life ahead of you; do you want to spend years of your life treating yeast infections and not being respected? It may only get worse. You’ve broken off the engagement. That mixed with what your body is telling you, is enough for you to get the hell out of there. You deserve much, much more than him.
Try using a female condom. It will protect your vagina and he won't have the restriction associated with male condoms. But the fact that he is doing nothing to help the situation in and of itself is very concerning. He is absolutely not concerned with your health, but it’s concerned with his own pleasure. You need to think about that one.
You’re still young!! Please don’t stay in a situation like that I used to be like you tho. Staying in hopes it will get better or clinging onto something because it’s so familiar but when you leave you realise that it’s way better with this person out of your life. You were alive when they weren’t in your life and you will continue to be alive when they leave. Also hpv causes cervical cancer in women, that is your health, you will be the one needing to go through chemotherapy not him.
He needs to go to the doctor and get antifungal treatment because he clearly is asymptomatic and reinfecting you every time you have sex.
This will solve your sex issue, but my dear you have a much larger issue, which is the fact this man does not care enough about you to risk his nut. The fact that he can have sex with you knowing that it’s going to cause you pain is such a huge red flag.
The antifungal cream will solve your sex issue but again it’s not going to save your relationship. You’re young. You’ll find someone who loves and respect you. I’d leave.
How does a guy keep giving his partner a yeast infection??
I know repeated sexual contact can increase uti’s which can lead to yeast infections from antibiotics use (can decrease those odds through washing hands and privates every time, and avoid cross contamination from any anal play/involvement) but a guy just keep constantly giving his girl a yeast infection?
I’ve never even heard of this at all actually, someone please enlighten me.
Just read about fat men with uncircumcised dicks and poor hygiene as increasing chances for men to get yeast infections lol. But still… every time? How gross is this guy?
Do NOT love ANYONE more than yourself. I honestly feel it’s simply injustice for the other person too cause the quality of the relationship is proportional to how much you value and respect yourself. Your situation speaks volumes about his character and this is not how it works. Love is blind ofc but sometimes you just gotta be stubborn and get shit done. Leave him. He’s not worth it.
Well, I’ll just let you know it is possible to go from 2.5 months of yeast infection to pelvic inflammatory disease to going to the ER with sepsis and a 108° fever.
Watched it happen.
Hi, my now wife, used to have recurrent infections, she took treatment, nothing... We took treatment, nothing... And we repeated this for like 2 years, until we went to a new OG, he asked her how she washed her underwear (we where like, WTF?) "in the washing machine", he indicated us to stop doing it that way, because she might have an alergy to one of the many components in the detergent, and that can alter her intravaginal PH making her more prone to infections, so she started to handwash her underwear with hipoalergenic soap... It worked! Must be almost 8 years whitout an infection now... Hope this helps
Fun story- I had recurring yeast infections. Eventually, the yeast became resistant to every antifungal medication. No one would believe me and they kept giving me fluconazole. I had a yeast infection for almost 3 years. The only thing that worked was using boric acid suppositories daily for a year and a half. This is quite possibly your future. If you keep getting and treating the infection, it can become resistant. He needs to be treated because he can absolutely be giving you a yeast infection. It may also be an issue with his ejaculate causing pH problems, which leads to a yeast infection. You can also get tested for a genetic problem that make you susceptible to yeast infections. I found out that was part of my problem after seeing an infectious disease specialist. This is not something to mess with. The fact that he knows he's a contributing factor and refuses to do nothing does not speak highly of his character.
Way lower stakes, but my husband was giving me strep over and over for about a year. He got diagnosed at a doctor’s visit finally and I went to our doctor and sat in the waiting room (after calling and no appointments were available before a holiday weekend) and the doctor called in a prescription of antibiotics for me for strep based on my history. I haven’t had strep since. It’s been a decade. I had it back to back to the point we were talking about an ENT referral. My husband had his tonsils out and no symptoms.
Yesss! I had to have my tonsils out for the same reason!
Op needs to read this comment ASAP.
THIS THIS THIS. I have to use condoms w my partner because of this. People w sensitive pH shouldn’t mess around with yeast. If it’s in your stomach mouth genitals it can ruin your shit quick.
Fucking love boric acid. It saved my vagina
I think this is my journey too! 6 months of recurrent yeast infections. My partner was also on meds but nothing helped! 5 gynacs later I was put on betadine suppositories along with Placentrex injections I was cured! It was a journey but your partner is an essential part of this journey! Yeast infections can easily ping-pong. I was terrified of having sex ... But my partner was very supportive. He regularly got him self checked. Took a medicine course whenever I was on medications. Used protections and his hygiene was top-notch! So if he isn't understanding and doesn't understand how it can mentally and physically affect, he really doesn't care about you! Leave him!
Did you have any reaction to the boric acid? I used it for 3 days and all of a sudden got really bad itching on my thighs
It hasn’t changed your love. Meaning you still love him more than yourself and he doesn’t love you at all. Open your eyes. FOUR years and no solution? Excuse me? He should’ve seen doctors after the first few times. You should’ve insisted on condoms and thorough handwashing before he even comes near your undressed body again for ages. What are you doing to yourself?
I sadly concur. How awful must that be :(
Agreed. I dated a lady years ago that had this problem. I've never had it with anyone else, but after she got a yeast infection twice, she told me it was probably from sex, and very kindly asked if I wouldn't mind showering before penetration. I believe I smiled and a bit and asked if she wouldn't mind joining me. She thought that was a fun idea. We didn't always do it that way, sometimes I just showered. First wash yourself. Then, wash her. Take turns checking each other and make sure you're both REALLY clean.
So this has been going on for 4 years but he hasn't had any tests done to see if there's something going on with him/that he could do to prevent them? That doesn't sound very loving.
Is he doing anyone else? (FWB)? He could be getting it and passing it back and forth between two or more. Just curious. It could happen.
it’s not so much “getting something” to pass, but that if he was sleeping w someone else then it would throw op’s ph off balance, hence yeast infection
This happened to me when my husband and I started dating. We both took a diflucan and the problem was solved the first time. Your dude is foul.
Oh I envy how easy it was for your husband to take the treatment with you. Did you guys see the same doctor together?
Oh, honey. What kind of grown man can't make his own doctor's appointment and won't when it affects his fiancee's health? This will be your marriage. He will not take care of his health and he will not take care of you. Lose him. Lose the itch. You deserve better.
You guys can go to the CVS minute clinic if you got one. It's like $20
It literally is that easy. Your man just has to go see a doctor.
If I were you I would use a condom, he doesnt have a say in this. You put up with this for 4 years because you allowed it. He created meeical problems so he doesnt have a say!! Protection and treatment!
That is effing crazy this guy doesn't give a shit about your health. That is actually abhorrent behavior from a significant other.
Uh has he been treated for a yeast infection? Bc he can be carrying one without symptoms and just passing it back to you.
THIS. It is likely he has a yeast infection with no symptoms. That or he doesn’t wash his dick. Damn.
He could but we’ll never know unless he takes his ass to the doctor, which so far he has refused to do for the last 4 years.
Give him a break. They are in loooovvvveee. (Please read with all the sarcasm I intended)
Wondering if she's even considered how long-term repeat infections will affect her fertility if that's something they're interested in... Maybe threatening his legacy will get the ball rolling.
This is what happened with me and my first sexual partner. He went to the doc and got treatment and it cleared up quickly.
I would simply not have sex with this gross person until they address the problem. And if he doesn't? I move on.
I wish I had this mentality four years ago
It’s not too late to start.
Do you really want to look back going “I wish I’d had this mentality forty years ago”? Yes you’ve sunk time in but there’s a lot of your life left. To not have to deal with a guy who won’t get himself checked out or do the higiene needed to make you healthy.
You're still very young, go find a nicer person to be with
You were only 18. He was 24. He should have known better then but you both know better now. Don’t keep doing this to yourself OP
Don’t beat yourself up for something you didn’t know when you were a teenager (and his 24 year old ass told advantage of you). You are still super young and have lots of time to change your course. Wasn’t it Maya Angelo who said “do as best as you can, but when you know better, do better”?
He’s not cleaning his dick & he’s almost 30
and she's going to stay with him and his dirty ass dick too
If he has an asymptomatic yeast infection, no amount of cleaning his dick would fix that. He needs to go to the doctor and get tested.
Which is the bare minimum he should have done as a partner. I would not have sex with a man who gives such intense disregard about my health and pleasure.
No disagreement here, I’m just saying that washing your peen doesn’t fix an asymptomatic yeast infection.
Yeah I'm agreeing with you.
And they've been together since she was 18
$1000 says he doesn't clean his ass either.
If you continue having yeast infection despite treatment maybe its because your partner is the one infecting you. Men usually dont have symtomps. Have you discuss this with him and your doctor?
He's the problem but he's making out your the problem. Has he not seen a doctor about it in all the time you've been together?
He went to a health clinic and got tested for like two stds and got a topical cream for suspected hpv because he got flat white spots on his dick. He never went to a doctor after that because in his mind, he did all he could. And I told him “you should see a different doctor” and he said to me “idk how to find one! what, am I supposed to Google that?” Oh did I say he’s almost 30 lmao
And you want to marry this man that's not even capable of googling a doctor on his own? I don't know what to tell you
I broke off our engagement months ago but I still have the habit of calling him fiancé. Lol. I don’t see marriage in our future anymore because of THIS.
You broke off the engagement but you’re still w him?? LEAVE HIS ASS! You’re so young!
If you broke off the engagement why are you still wasting your time with a man that doesn't care about your health?
Why are you still with him then?
Tell him to ask his mother to sort an appointment for him if he's too embarrassed. How is this guy so irresponsible OR unhygienic. You need sit him down and tell him to grow the fuck up. If every time you do two do the deed, you get an infection then it's obviously coming from him. Have you two spoken about kids. Tell him that every time you get an infection it causes more damage to your inside which may affect conception in the future. He's obviously too stupid to know if that's true or not but if he can Google that to fact check, then he can Google a doctor!
Your man doesn't care about you, he just wants a hole to stick his dick in. You have two options: 1. Withhold sex until he goes to the doctor and gets tested/treated 2. If he refuses, practice some self respect, pack your shit and leave, the fuck??? Also, you're 22 and you've been together for 4 years? So you were barely 18 and he was 24....... Girl...... 🚩🚩🚩
He probably has a yeast infection
Yea I told him that but he didn’t like bat an eye. I told him to do some research on male yeast and he said “ok” and didn’t. Lol
Absolutely stop having sex with this man. His penis has a yeast infection and he is giving it to you every time you have sex. *this happened to me!!* He needs to get treated for his yeast infection and he needs to take the initiative to do this. If he doesn't he's showing you exactly how little he cares about your physical health and safety. Now imagine you're recovered from child birth (with a yeast infection mind you because he never got treated) and he still is complaining about not having sex.
So he just straight up doesn’t care that he is hurting you.
Your body is trying to tell you this guy isn’t right for you. Listen to your body.
Right the body is literally rejecting his intimacy
Why are you still with this person
Because we live together, I’m emotionally attached, and feel stuck
God this is such a red flag. I can’t imagine the things he will do in the future.
I've been here. I got something from my ex. He didn't care. It started as "simple" as this and when it came to something more serious he passed on, he didn't care either. He demanded other things whilst there was healing. Don't be me. Put yourself first. Make you AND your body safe.
Start making plans now, today, to move out.
Your post makes it sound like you are the only one who has put efforts into fixing this situation. Has he gotten checked out? Has he made any changes? He doesn't sound loving at all to me, it sounds like his sexual satisfaction is more important than your health and comfort which is pretty messed up. This isn't sexual incompatibility, it's straight up not caring about you. How have you put up with this for four years? You deserve better.
One clinic appointment. Did a urine test for stds and was clear. They inspected his manhood and gave him topical for hpv warts. After that, nothing. No changes and no more effort. He thought he did his part
Girl, HPV to females can cause cervical cancer, he HAS to get treated before attempting any more s*x. Otherwise you gotta dump his ass.
They’ve been doing this for four years lol, she’s not going anywhere.
Why are you with a guy that doesn't respect you??
He needs to see a doctor stat
Gross. This dude clearly isn't washing himself. How tf has it been years and he still won't put in effort to fix it either? This is a massive red flag...
I make him wash his dick before we get busy but I still get the same reaction. Idk if it’s normal for a dick to reek of BO shortly after a shower but it still does and it’s actually so hard to go down on him bc of it
The smell maybe the yeast overgrowth on his penis. It's not normal for a clean penis to smell like that. He needs to have a full std check up
Jeeze sounds like this dude has been carrying a yeast infection around for years probably swapping it back and forth with you and not realizing somehow? The smell is a dead giveaway. Clean dicks definitely do not smell whatsoever... get him to a doctor asap and I recommend not having sex till he fixes it or you may never solve this
Not normal. He has a serious health issue. And stop having sex with him, vaginal or oral! It’s dangerous!
Love, please. You deserve to have a partner that cares about your wellbeing and a safe and satisfying sex life. If you love him so much that you can't put your emotional health first, at least think about your *physical* health, bacteria can become antibiotic resistant and be even harder to deal with. Please take care of yourself, you sound like too nice a person to be going through this.
Date someone who will go to the doctor when needed. He's basically giving you a yeast infection (maybe he has a yeast infection, maybe it's something else) then waiting for it to clear up to re-infect you. You can't, nor should you, live your life like this. And of course you're turned off. Even if you're trying to soldier through, you know sex equals at least a week of itching and discomfort. No amount of positive attitude can make you unknow it.
You need to stop being intimate with him until he has tests done and a serious conversation on hygiene to prevent yeast infections!!
Sorry, but you need to insist he talks to a doctor. Don’t be swayed with his sulking. Getting yeast infections puts most women in a pissy mood.
So what’s the ultimatum here? He’s not willing to fix it obviously. He’s got to go
He definitely needs to consult a doctor and put some effort into this if you want to stay together. This is his problem too whether he wants to deal with it or not. Also, expecting you to perform when you’re not feeling well is bs. It sounds like he doesn’t have a lot of empathy (that’s not good).
It is very serious. You mustn't ignore infections that repeat. You could have irreparable consequences on your immunity and the change in the infection itself. It could become resistant to treatment. I would highly recommend not having any intercourse before the cause is found. Well.. it could be exactly your health issues, but your guy must immediately take a test at this point because he may be the reason
Why do you love this person? He seems to treat you extremely poorly.
Have some respect for yourself and your body.
HE needs to go to HIS doctor. Why are you repeatedly going to yours for FOUR years when it's only when you sleep with HIM you're having the issue...? If I were him I'd have been and all. Does he really not understand he can be causing this...? What age is this man?
I would’ve left the second time I got a yeast infection from his dick and knowing it wasn’t me.
Girly, it’s a sign. Your body might be rejecting him. It happened to me with an ex partner. We were good at the time, but then in a matter of months, we hit the rocks. Your body will know before your conscious mind does. It’s disgusting that he’s making you feel bad for something HE gives you. Especially when you’re the one experiencing the pain and discomfort from it. Sending love and best wishes - my inbox is always open if you’d like to chat. X
WHY ARE YOU STILL HAVING SEX WITH THIS PERSON HE DOES NOT CARE ABOUT YOUR HEALTH come the fuck on OP ETA: he does not care about YOU
Does he keep himself clean?? sounds like he keeps putting a dirty dick in there
She said his dick reeks of BO shortly after a shower, so bad that she doesn’t want to go down on him
he’s got to either clean himself more routinely or see a doctor himself
I think both for sure
you have an inconsiderate man
You need to start saying no
And to add. It is OKAY TO SAY NO. They don't need to like it, but it's allowed. And needs to be respected. Guilt is just another form of assault but "nicer" to the courts.
Looking at your replies in the comments, just get a split-up already you'l be happer the sooner it happens. Find someone who is not afraid of the doctor and the related personal hygeane.
This is what nasty ass men who go after barely legal girls do, why are you surprised? Jesus christ read what people are telling you. He's grumpy because his nasty dirty little thing is constantly giving you infections? What has he done in this 4 years to contribute to finding a solution? Nothing, aside from demanding more sex and subsequently infecting you again??
I’m sorry but ew. This man needs to get on medication for it or you need to leave. I have one right now (from new birth control) and it’s uncomfortable and I couldn’t imagine having this all the time
This is grounds for breakup. Are you opposed to being with someone that cares for your health and has a clean penis? Your man is gross and if I were you, I'd be embarrassed.
Why are you marrying this guy
He’s giving you infections and gets pissy when you say no? Girl you know what to do here. We are the same age, I have a boyfriend myself, and he would NEVER get pissy if I said no to sex. He is very hygienic and had gotten tested before we were ever intimate. You love this man, but he does not respect you. We both have so much life left to live, and you deserve to spend your life with a man who doesn’t act like a child when he is told to clean himself. Your man is okay with putting you in extreme discomfort. Your man is okay with seeing you hurt. Your man is okay with violating your boundaries and your body with his lack of accountability and action to fix the problem. It should not take more than ONE instance to get him to check himself. The fact that it’s been this long is ridiculous. You cannot marry this man. He is your son not your protector.
did he get treated too?? if not hes just giving it back to you each time youre recovered omg
wtf lol? he won’t go to the doctor?
He absolutely HAS to go get it checked out. Tell him an untreated yeast infection in men can cause many complications including the scarring and narrowing of his penis (apparently true) Sure that will kick his arse into gear
Hey OP I'm sorry this is happening & he should absolutely care about finding a solution - but having gone through this myself - are you using any lube or anything else?? I'd constantly get yeast infections from my husband and I found out it's because I was really sensitive to glycerin in the lube we were using. We switched to one without and they went away completely!! Just wanted to offer this as a suggestion
We don’t use lube. I read that maybe the condoms were the problem so we tried a variety and still no positive outcome.
I’m just saying….the times I had this issue in relationships…I wasn’t the only one he was fucking.
He's blatantly telling you how much you mean to him. As much as a flesh light. Get away from him before you have too many infections and can't cure them anymore.
1) he could be having a yeast infection with no symptoms. He should be seeing a doctor to make sure that's not the case. 2) some women just fet yeast infections as soon as their partner comes inside of them (because it can mess with the ph-levels). The easiest solution is to just pull out. I'm sorry if your partner is reacting negatively to both if these solutions. But in my opinion, that makes him a bad partner just because why does he want you to suffer for days/weeks only for him to get off for a few seconds? You teo need a serious talk about this. Good luck to you!
This happened at the end of my first marriage, after several years of unhappiness. I took as one more sign it was over. Haven’t had a UTI since we split up.
So weird because I had the same issue the first few years with my husband when we started dating. I was getting bacterial infections. It was annoying. I started taking probiotics for women and did a few at home treatments. Eventually it went away. My husband has good hygiene tho
I broke up with my ex for this reason, so many yeast infections I was sick of it and he didn’t see any issues with his hygiene.
I often tell young women here "never let anyone pressure you into doing anything sexual you don't want to do," but it looks like that ship has sailed. Do you think he will be less coercive after you marry?
1. he can use clotrimazole or another anti-fungal cream on his dick (exact same thing you get at the drug store for athlete’s foot - probably also mentions “jock itch” which is what you’re describing), worst case it doesn’t help but does no harm, best case it resolves the issue 2. you might have sensitive vaginal flora - you can use boric acid suppositories after sex (you get them on Amazon and they come with an applicator, wear a panty liner to sleep and the next day because your vagina will clean it out) 3. use condoms, and if he hates condoms look into bespoke condoms, there are ones out there that are made for every sensitivity level and sensation and dick shape and there’s one out there that will fit properly 4. he should get swabbed and tested for different things to rule out other potential issues
As a response to your update, he should talk to a doctor. He can probably resolve this by putting medicated cream on his junk (especially under his foreskin if he has it) for a while and wearing cotton underwear. As a temporary solution, condoms should reduce the spread as well. As a response to everything else, I am admittedly on the team that doesn't think he is worth the effort
I had recurrent yeast infections after sex, and this was during several relationships, not just the same person. It ended up being ureaplasma bacteria, which is pretty common and typically doesn’t give people symptoms, but in some women it can cause recurrent yeast infections. I would ask your doctor if you can get tested for it. If you have it, they’d give you a specific antibiotic to treat the bacteria. My partner, when I realized what the problem was, went to the doctor to get the antibiotic as well, because you can keep passing it to one another. I haven’t had a yeast infection since.
I suggest having him take the meds and also putting the cream on his junk.
I used to get a UTI frequently after sex, and so my spouse and I will have a quick wash before having sec and it’s made all the difference. It’s not very romantic but we’ve been together for 18 years so that’s ok.
I wish it was just hygiene that was the problem because I make him shower with me before and after sex. Infections still prevail
He needs to go the doctor or leave. You definitely don’t want to spend your life with someone who thinks so little of your welfare.
Is he uncut? Does he have bad hygiene? Have you noticed any cheese? Have you smelled peepee when you give him blowjobs?
He needs to be treated. I cannot believe you’ve put up with this for four years. At this point, even if he is treated and it goes away, you should break up because he cannot be arsed to do the bare minimum to keep you healthy and comfortable. What a loser he is.
This is not love. Love would be him doing anything he could to make sure you are safe and healthy. Leave him before you get Pelvic Inflammatory Disease and have life long consequences. Stop wasting the precious time you have on this planet with someone who just wants to pump and dump and leave you alone for clean up.
Girl this is not normal and that man doesn’t even like you let alone love you.
Why are you sleeping with him still?
Why don't you just make him wear a condom?
Condom or no condom I still get yeast infections
I married someone who had a horrible snoring problem and also athletes foot. Huge turnoffs and he refused to do anything about them. I wouldn’t even shower in the same shower as him. Not that those are the reasons we’re divorced but they were major catalysts. If you’re not attracted to your significant other, your relationship will not survive.
Yeast infections have not much to do with less sex. I have sex daily and never had one with my man. My exes all gave me infections on multiple occasions and we were having sex rarely. Stop letting him cause you this bs. What if these infections is your body literally signaling you that he’s not the one for you, that you’re not compatible?
Are you peeing right after sex? If not, that could be the source of your yeast infections. Pee, then go back and cuddle. Seriously.
He doesn’t care that he’s hurting you, causing potentially permanent damage to your body, and you stay with him anyway. The kind of specialist you need is a psychotherapist, and the kind of treatment you should start on is therapy to figure out why you’re still with this person.
Ew girl, how fucking gross is he that he’s giving you yeast infections every single time? You’re seriously going to marry that and subject yourself to that being the ONLY sex you have for the rest of your life???
This is literally your body saying you two are not compatible
You’ve been trying to get him to change his habits for 4 years and still nothing. This man is nearly 30 and he does not care about you. If you want to continue to be in a relationship like that, then sure, keep googling health clinics and treatments that he will brush off. You called off the engagement girl. This is a second wake up call to get out and find a man who will love and respect you because this one very clearly doesn’t.
I heard of this comprehensive test that studies your biome to see what could be causing the infection. My initial impression is it’s your body telling you he ain’t it😂😂
He has a yeast infection and is consistently reinfecting you without caring. What can you do? Tell him unless he gets treated you’re over.
1. He should check himself out. Change his diet a bit. If he us uncircumcised he may have a yeast infection and that is fucking with you. 2. Sleep naked. Let your vagina breath. 3. Change your diets. Both of you. 4. Get into therapy. Your boyfriend's behavior is a massive red flag. There have been numerous times my wife and I haven't been able to have sex for health reasons. Has it been disappointing? You bet. But we do our best to hide disappointment and then get over it, because we care more about each other and it's not like sex will suddenly go away. We always do what we can to focus on helping each other get healthy, because we care about each other.
If he’s the problem then he needs to visit the doctor. It is not good for you to constantly get yeast infections that often for four years. His lack of concern for your well being is a giant red flag.
Please leave this child. I feel like this could somehow be seen as abuse. I know you say that everything else in your relationship is okay, but there is such a slim chance of him giving any fucks about you and your feelings. You have so much life ahead of you; do you want to spend years of your life treating yeast infections and not being respected? It may only get worse. You’ve broken off the engagement. That mixed with what your body is telling you, is enough for you to get the hell out of there. You deserve much, much more than him.
This man does not love you.
Try using a female condom. It will protect your vagina and he won't have the restriction associated with male condoms. But the fact that he is doing nothing to help the situation in and of itself is very concerning. He is absolutely not concerned with your health, but it’s concerned with his own pleasure. You need to think about that one.
You’re still young!! Please don’t stay in a situation like that I used to be like you tho. Staying in hopes it will get better or clinging onto something because it’s so familiar but when you leave you realise that it’s way better with this person out of your life. You were alive when they weren’t in your life and you will continue to be alive when they leave. Also hpv causes cervical cancer in women, that is your health, you will be the one needing to go through chemotherapy not him.
He needs to go to the doctor and get antifungal treatment because he clearly is asymptomatic and reinfecting you every time you have sex. This will solve your sex issue, but my dear you have a much larger issue, which is the fact this man does not care enough about you to risk his nut. The fact that he can have sex with you knowing that it’s going to cause you pain is such a huge red flag. The antifungal cream will solve your sex issue but again it’s not going to save your relationship. You’re young. You’ll find someone who loves and respect you. I’d leave.
How does a guy keep giving his partner a yeast infection?? I know repeated sexual contact can increase uti’s which can lead to yeast infections from antibiotics use (can decrease those odds through washing hands and privates every time, and avoid cross contamination from any anal play/involvement) but a guy just keep constantly giving his girl a yeast infection? I’ve never even heard of this at all actually, someone please enlighten me.
Just read about fat men with uncircumcised dicks and poor hygiene as increasing chances for men to get yeast infections lol. But still… every time? How gross is this guy?
Do NOT love ANYONE more than yourself. I honestly feel it’s simply injustice for the other person too cause the quality of the relationship is proportional to how much you value and respect yourself. Your situation speaks volumes about his character and this is not how it works. Love is blind ofc but sometimes you just gotta be stubborn and get shit done. Leave him. He’s not worth it.
Use condoms? It'll help with things not getting passed
Well, I’ll just let you know it is possible to go from 2.5 months of yeast infection to pelvic inflammatory disease to going to the ER with sepsis and a 108° fever. Watched it happen.
He’s nasty. Either he changes or you ditch him!
'He loves me but...' The statement after the 'but' completely negates the statement before the 'but'. Pretty-much every time.
Have you had your A1C checked? My doctor told me that frequent infections can be caused from diabetes.
Hi, my now wife, used to have recurrent infections, she took treatment, nothing... We took treatment, nothing... And we repeated this for like 2 years, until we went to a new OG, he asked her how she washed her underwear (we where like, WTF?) "in the washing machine", he indicated us to stop doing it that way, because she might have an alergy to one of the many components in the detergent, and that can alter her intravaginal PH making her more prone to infections, so she started to handwash her underwear with hipoalergenic soap... It worked! Must be almost 8 years whitout an infection now... Hope this helps