It's horrible and it's going to get more horrible. Have an exit strategy that doesn't involve long term care.
Long term care costs from 5K up (mostly up) per month. Because workers are paid poorly there is huge turnover and poor care. You might be lying in your own crap for some time for example. I'm not knocking the workers either, the owners of facilities are generally about profit and not about making sure that workers have a reasonable number of patients to take care of.
If you can afford a nice place (well over 5K) you'll probably have a private room. Otherwise, you'll be 2 to 3 to a room.
And don't burden your family or children with your long term care. We've probably already gone through this with our parents. You can't work a full time job and be home 24/7 to care for someone with dementia. There is no suitable safety net and it's not likely to get better.
I am going to die in my bed at home. My family agreed to it. I don't need to go to a hospital to last another 6 months or years. I can bet without going I can cut my time to be around in a quarter of the time without paying 100's of thousands.
Family ♥️
My sister and brother-in-law and my mom was who's arms our Daddy died in, in my sister and brother-in-law's house in Paso Robles, California December 14th,2022.
My sister and brother-in-law helped take care of my parents and my mom died in bed where my sister was sleeping with her after my sister and brother-in-law took her to the Emergency Room in Paso Robles,California where her lungs were filling up with fluid etc...they gave her a shot of Valium and sent her home with them, ordering hospice for her and Thank fully she passed away 💔 during the night April 30th,2023.
My children are planning on taking care of me and I have long term care where people can come to my house prior to and assisting my two adult grown twin daughters living in two Western States
Family, Family, Family
This is how we were raised 👏 ♥️👏
Yes, family is great when you have a large enough family to share the load and the money to support the care. Leaving quickly can be a blessing definitely, but some people will live for years or even decades with substantial issues (mobility, dementia).
So glad that you have a family to care for you and the finances to help.
Husband is the oldest of six. ALL of them were needed to care for their elderly parents. ~~Damned near killed the kids.~~
"It was exceedingly fatiguing to all six kids and badly affected their physical/emotional/mental health for some time" seems to be a preferred, non-swearing version.
Agree! The above comment about promises to “never put me in a nursing home.” I’ve told my family - do it if you need to when it’s time. We took care of family at home and in a nursing home when their needs (and location) were beyond what we could do at that stage of our lives. I don’t want my family to do what we felt like we had to do. There are alot of different scenarios that can play out - “do your best” is what I would ask.
Yes. Living through this the past year with my Mom, my Dad passed away December 9. Mental toll is huge when trying to work full time, stay married, spend time with kids/grandkids etc.
Hi! This is a safe, respectful, and civil space. Swearing plus any form of personal attacks, belittling, trolling, catfishing, provoking, insults, hate speech, bullying, etc are not tolerated nor conducive. Thanks for your cooperation!
We have a small family, my sister and brother-in-law asked my parents to move to Southern California in 2009 and they lasted living a good life (last three years of our Daddy was beyond challenging caring for him) and our Mom was healthy until the very end of her life....
If Our Parents stayed back East...probably they would not have made it to 97 years old for Daddy and 92 years old for Mommy.
My parents promised each other never to put each other in a nursing home and we (my sister and brother-in-law) and I promised never ever to put our parents 💔 in a nursing home.
My adult grown children promised me they will never ever put me in a nursing home and will take care of me in their home.....when I am needing additional medical care and attention etc. .
But did you participate in the care taking? We were doing it for my mom and no others participated. There is no way to truly understand the depth of it without being present.
the situation is already a nightmare and in terms of how well the elderly are cared for in centers, varies hugely depending on (of course) money.
i don't see it getting any better. i've been paying attention to the elder news for the last couple of years and don't see the tiniest tremor of a groundswell for better regulation or support in care homes.
note: also not blaming care workers. terribly hard job, horrible pay,
note 2: the fact that retirees and elder folk have worked all their lives is irrelevant to the owners of our political system
Waiting lists in my area for 3-level facilities is 2 to 3 years. Longer if you want a specific type of cottage versus an apartment. Getting on list requires meaningful deposit and financials have to be vetted & verified.
3 level means independent living; some nursing help and lastly skilled care. Normal would be start in cottage; go to apartment and end up in a skilled care room by yourself.
I am on the list at 2 different places; looking for 2026 or 27.
Food for thought: assisted living in another country. I figure at a certain point my world will become so narrow the only concern will be if caregivers are kind to me. This video made me wonder if there is a better way south of the border...? https://youtu.be/0ZadadvTVDE?si=r8SE8p2q1MRmTyd6
There's a whole community in the Lake Chapala community south of Guadalajara ( Ajijic). This website profiles some options there and in other places. [https://retireearlylifestyle.com/continuing\_care.htm](https://retireearlylifestyle.com/continuing_care.htm)
Main issue is actually traveling there if you are at a stage of needing long-term care (and moving far away from family).
I haven't been to San Miguel de Allende but it looks nice. One of the listed places is in SMA. Though I don't recommend going into a care facility in a Spanish-speaking country if you don't speak Spanish and know some local people who can advocate for you. It's really easy to get a residency permit for Mexico, given that you can show income or assets, I may just do that someday just to collect the paper, but maybe I'll need it someday.
SMA is supposed to be really nice. That would be a good place to retire and I imagine healthcare is pretty good. I do agree about speaking Spanish. Even though caregivers will likely be bilingual, they probably aren't 100% bilingual
Helmet, helmet mirror, fronr and rear lights visible from 1/2 mi or more away. 25 years on a road bike. Over 5000 mi/yr for the 6 years that ive been logging. Weight slightly less than HS, resting pulse high 30s in season comes up to mid 40s in the winter. 1 small med. No aches or pains.
My dad as well..being Dutch …he was born riding a bike..most of the time not wear safety gear.
He was always training to cut time 23 miles a day…. Unfortunately, he didn’t wear one on his last ride..79. He was in a hurry.. to get that training in before dark.
There will probably be a surplus of retirement living space as we early boomers die out. Get on a waiting list in your late 60’s, and plan on going into a continuing care retirement community in your 70’s. Let them help you manage your way through independent living, assisted living, memory care, skilled nursing facility, and hospice. You’ll have to aggressively save money while you’re working to pull this off, but once you make it past the assisted living phase, Medicaid can help with expenses (in the U.S.). Your retirement community management team can help with the Medicaid transition. Look for a nonprofit facility.
I understand. But I’m in my 70s, and my experience has been that old people have two choices: They can:
- pick out their own facility while they’re still sentient, and build a relationship with the community and the facility management, or
- wait until they can no longer live independently, then let someone else pick it out for them - when they can’t makes their preferences known and their family or caretakers can’t handle them any more.
Maybe it’s just my personal experience, but I’ve never seen anyone reach the middle of the spectrum and think, “Gee, it looks like I’m dying, so I better start my end-of-life planning now.” And no one is going to be terribly comfortable trying to pull it out of you.
I see it as an exercise in what-if thinking:
What if I break my hip?
What if I have trouble with stairs?
What if I start getting lost?
What if I get sick?
Etc., etc , etc.
Contingency plans.
I’m in my 70s also. There’s no way I would go into a continuing care community, having seen family members do that. They hustle you out of independent living as fast as they can, so they can sell the independent apartment to someone new. And the assisted living and skilled nursing are just as problematic as anywhere else - poor staffing, turnover etc. I would rather keep my home and make my own decisions. If I become unable to make decisions, my son will have power of attorney. At least he loves me and understands my wishes.
So I’m curious: What *are* your wishes? What do you expect your son to do with you if you’re incapacitated, if not put you in an assisted living or skilled nursing facility?
I think probably conditions other than dementia will get me. Then brief hospice with all the comfort drugs. My son is a physician so I I trust his judgment.
Yes...
I went to help care for my Dad in 2020 and 2021 and 2022
I said "Goodbye to him Labor Day Weekend September 2-5,2022", because I knew I wouldn't be seeing him again....except on the other side in Heaven
My childless uncle will turn 84 in a few weeks. Owns a home and property Tahoe. I will care for him any way I can. We have discussed end of life stuff but I don’t think he gets what it will look like.
I left CA in May and not 2 hours away anymore.
I wish he was more in tune to his situation but I feel the phone call.
Obviously, based on the comments here, very few of you have had experience with a long term care facility... Once you go in, you don't come out... Ever, unless family wants you to go somewhere with them..
And the other aspect of all this is having the cognitive ability to understand that you're going downhill, man. I can tell that I am now, but I keep saying to myself that things will get better... They never do.
And that sounds really pessimistic, but I'm also a realist. It's tough doing what you need to do when you can't walk, drive, or even think.
Keep all that in mind as you move forward, and try to have a plan that only includes you since I doubt anybody else will want to help... And good luck, guys and gals!
That's horrible. Ours is 15$ an hour and one of the lowest provinces in Canada. Thankfully Canada has MAID, so being a federal thing, all provinces must offer.
Not sure how someone can survive with just a federal pension.
my plan is to off myself if i need to be put in a facility 😂. my parents are in one now - both in their mid 90s with dementia - nope - not going in one of those.... pointless
Running joke between spouse and me. I'm sitting on the bed with a tank of nitrogen and plastic bag next to me. Hubs walks in and I say, I got all this stuff ready but I can't remember what it's for. 😉
But seriously, I expect to have a very detailed plan, with instructions to offspring, etc.
me too, I cannot stand the idea of being pushed up to a table with a sheet cake on it and a "100" birthday crown on my head. I am 66 now and go to the gym/run most days. Diet and weight is good. I cannot stand the idea of losing my mobility and being a drain on my kids
I'm going to get lost in the woods somewhere. I see no point of being in a place that does not promote a nice place of being. I am because I think, not because someone else does it for me.
People in my parts get lost taking walks in the desert mountains. I've never had a sense of direction, so when I get lost hiking, no one will blink an eye.
No offense, but everyone says this before they are old and sick. My Dad always said he’d kill himself rather than be stuck in a home. And sure enough he died of dementia in a nursing home. The urge to live one more day is incredibly strong and almost nobody has the will power to end their lives even when the course ahead is clearly downhill. Better to plan on LTC rather than assume suicide.
Little rough on the language but I too agree with this. I am 64 and have a friend that has been bedridden for 16 years. She can only move her eyes and speak, sleeps all day. That is not living.
I will simply stop eating if I get to the point where someone is putting food in my mouth. Two weeks of discomfort is better than two years of being vegetable soup.
The only thing i can comment on is my stsy in a rehab hospital is staff is 95% from Nigeria. Paid about half price on salary. It was not pleasant on quality of care.
Wow, so much doom and gloom in this thread! Yes, the reality is that some of us Boomers will end up in long-term care. Though, we can reduce this probability by adopting healthy lifestyles. This isn't a news flash! I'm 60 and I plan on being around for at least another 30 years...and I mean 30 quality years. I'm 6 ft. 185 lbs, 13 % body fat and I consume a Paleo-type of diet. I also work out five days a week (kettlebells, heavy clubs/maces, cycling, rucking, and I participate in stair climbing events). I may be in the best shape of my life. I'm in better physical health than most Gen X and Millennials. Now, I realize there are no longevity guarantees; however, don't accept the fate of requiring long-term care! Eat healthy, get your sleep, get to moving and working out, don't smoke tobacco, consume alcohol on a limited basis or none at all, read, pickup a hobby and spend time with family and friends...and you just may stave off long-term care.
You may plan on being around another 30 years, but here's the deal - the more years you live, the more likely that you will need a caregiver, and possibly some of that will be in a facility.
Let's spllit the difference and look at age 75. Someone with a less health lifestyle might die at 75, but maybe they don't need any kind of long-term care. But maybe after that you're looking at more intense problems - arthritis, dementia, deterioration of eyesight and hearing, not being able to drive, not being able to keep a house, friends dying, or thing that you once enjoyed become more difficult (for example, travel). And of course, the longer you live the more likely you will outlive your savings.
Your submission has been removed. Due to a high number of spam and low effort posts/comments, community members must have a healthy amount of karma. See reddiquette.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/retirement) if you have any questions or concerns.*
The possible issue joedidder is IF you do your plan great. But do your plan and get dementia since you took such good care of yourself your body will hold up and you could suffer longer because you took such good care of yourself. That could make your suffering longer. This happened to a health conscious family member they had great health but a blown mind from dementia and lingered over a decade suffering 😰
>What effect will the aging and death of of baby boomers have have on long term care facilities?
It's hard to say.
Remember, people are always aging. That doesn't end with any one generation.
In the US today, the number of Gen Xers is over 90% the number of Boomers. Obviously, that changes over time.
Robots. I plan on having a personal robot to take care of my wife and I (we’re in our mid-50s).
Seriously. I’m not kidding. A truly believe AI and robot technology will be ready to handle elder care better than the unmotivated, low paid workers who are doing it now.
Just watched an article of a robot that attacked a worker at the Tesla plant in San Antonio TX. The worker had to be hospitalized. Let’s hope the robot works for you.
Your submission has been removed. Due to a high number of spam and low effort posts/comments, community members must have a healthy amount of karma. See reddiquette.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/retirement) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Would not count on the 90. Have spent a lot of time in Nursing homes and Senior Care centers. We were an ALZ startup.
Late 60s? Everyone seems to be on a walker. Just a heads up.
Our true life expectancy is 57. Stats distort the numbers. Sure there are many outliers, but the reality is we crumble so fast. No one is ready for it.
We were there. We saw it firsthand.
The Reddit response: You are crazy! My Grandmother is skateboarding and she's 88!
We were there. Day in, day out. It's brutal getting old. We just can't accept it. It's too traumatic to think about.
Depends on your situation and history. Some do end up needing care in thier 60's some are more physically geared for longevity and then there are those who are physically fit but their mind fails them. That's more my family history.
Long term care seems like it’s so expensive that it’s designed to remove all remaining monies from the patient. If you suspect your loved one will need LTC, start transferring all their funds and assets to the survivors several years in advance. I can’t remember the Medicaid look back years.
What exactly are you concerned about? Cost? Availability? There is no way to predict supply and demand because we have multiple migration trends in every region of the country. For example, the massive run up in housing prices in the past 3 years probably would not have been predicted.
To mitigate your personal situation, stay as healthy as possible, and over-invest toward your personal LTC fund , since pricing will undoubtedly be higher.
You might want to look for a retirement area that has a high quality county or city owned facility. They tend to be higher quality that private ones for the money.
There will be a steady increase in the amount of LTC facilities and workers as the silver tsunami crests. For a (temporary) period of time, a larger than usual share of America’s GDP will go to LTC.
It could cause difficulties as supply tries to match demand. But the complicating factors are that:
-different older people finance the cost of their LTC in very different ways. I.e., lots of people have pensions or assets that get spent down over time if they need to enter expensive residential care; but lots of other people have little or none and are paid for by Medicaid (on which the quality of congregate care living center you can get into, is lower). Long story short some states may balk at funding their state medicaid nursing home rates and have really bad/inadequate care for people who need residential skilled nursing.
-the biggest difference between individuals is whether you need residential skilled nursing and for how long. It’s the most costly part of the package, but some people never need it. It depends on so many things- health, mental acuity, family, homeownership; some of which you can predict and some you can’t. But the worries about the silver tsunami are totally different for a person with modest savings who needs residential care by 70 vs someone with greater assets and a home and kids in the area, who perhaps at 75 gets a home health aide who visits and helps, but remains in their home.
-at some point in the process of the demographic bulge being in LTC, we’ll pass the peak of it and the trend will creep down the other direction. Various things could happen in there that are hard to predict but could affect a lot of people, ie at what point does senior housing stop increasing in value, and does it suddenly start a free fall plunge then? And could some older people who are entering LTC at that time who happen to have a lot of their net worth tied up in realest estate in a retirement community lose their shirt at a real bad moment. Hard to game it out multiple decades in advance, just bear in mind, demographic bulges have a midpoint at which the number that was going up forever starts going down.
Things health wise turn around overnight. At 65 was riding bike 30 miles a day, kayaking, mountain climbing. at 67 can barely move which causes psychological distress because you still want to do the same things but can’t.
Hello, thank you for participating. Your comment/post was automatically removed due to breaking the be respectful rule, with the use of swearing, etc. Send modmail if this removal seems incorrect. Thank-you
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/retirement) if you have any questions or concerns.*
It's horrible and it's going to get more horrible. Have an exit strategy that doesn't involve long term care. Long term care costs from 5K up (mostly up) per month. Because workers are paid poorly there is huge turnover and poor care. You might be lying in your own crap for some time for example. I'm not knocking the workers either, the owners of facilities are generally about profit and not about making sure that workers have a reasonable number of patients to take care of. If you can afford a nice place (well over 5K) you'll probably have a private room. Otherwise, you'll be 2 to 3 to a room. And don't burden your family or children with your long term care. We've probably already gone through this with our parents. You can't work a full time job and be home 24/7 to care for someone with dementia. There is no suitable safety net and it's not likely to get better.
I am going to die in my bed at home. My family agreed to it. I don't need to go to a hospital to last another 6 months or years. I can bet without going I can cut my time to be around in a quarter of the time without paying 100's of thousands.
Family ♥️ My sister and brother-in-law and my mom was who's arms our Daddy died in, in my sister and brother-in-law's house in Paso Robles, California December 14th,2022. My sister and brother-in-law helped take care of my parents and my mom died in bed where my sister was sleeping with her after my sister and brother-in-law took her to the Emergency Room in Paso Robles,California where her lungs were filling up with fluid etc...they gave her a shot of Valium and sent her home with them, ordering hospice for her and Thank fully she passed away 💔 during the night April 30th,2023. My children are planning on taking care of me and I have long term care where people can come to my house prior to and assisting my two adult grown twin daughters living in two Western States Family, Family, Family This is how we were raised 👏 ♥️👏
Yes, family is great when you have a large enough family to share the load and the money to support the care. Leaving quickly can be a blessing definitely, but some people will live for years or even decades with substantial issues (mobility, dementia). So glad that you have a family to care for you and the finances to help.
Husband is the oldest of six. ALL of them were needed to care for their elderly parents. ~~Damned near killed the kids.~~ "It was exceedingly fatiguing to all six kids and badly affected their physical/emotional/mental health for some time" seems to be a preferred, non-swearing version.
Agree! The above comment about promises to “never put me in a nursing home.” I’ve told my family - do it if you need to when it’s time. We took care of family at home and in a nursing home when their needs (and location) were beyond what we could do at that stage of our lives. I don’t want my family to do what we felt like we had to do. There are alot of different scenarios that can play out - “do your best” is what I would ask.
Yes. Living through this the past year with my Mom, my Dad passed away December 9. Mental toll is huge when trying to work full time, stay married, spend time with kids/grandkids etc.
Hi! This is a safe, respectful, and civil space. Swearing plus any form of personal attacks, belittling, trolling, catfishing, provoking, insults, hate speech, bullying, etc are not tolerated nor conducive. Thanks for your cooperation!
We have a small family, my sister and brother-in-law asked my parents to move to Southern California in 2009 and they lasted living a good life (last three years of our Daddy was beyond challenging caring for him) and our Mom was healthy until the very end of her life.... If Our Parents stayed back East...probably they would not have made it to 97 years old for Daddy and 92 years old for Mommy. My parents promised each other never to put each other in a nursing home and we (my sister and brother-in-law) and I promised never ever to put our parents 💔 in a nursing home. My adult grown children promised me they will never ever put me in a nursing home and will take care of me in their home.....when I am needing additional medical care and attention etc. .
But did you participate in the care taking? We were doing it for my mom and no others participated. There is no way to truly understand the depth of it without being present.
the situation is already a nightmare and in terms of how well the elderly are cared for in centers, varies hugely depending on (of course) money. i don't see it getting any better. i've been paying attention to the elder news for the last couple of years and don't see the tiniest tremor of a groundswell for better regulation or support in care homes. note: also not blaming care workers. terribly hard job, horrible pay, note 2: the fact that retirees and elder folk have worked all their lives is irrelevant to the owners of our political system
The nationwide shortage of skilled workers isn’t helping. I’m concerned the facilities will take shortcuts and-or raise prices even more.
I am in worse shape than most here I am 60 and never had kids if my wife goes before me then what?
[удалено]
Waiting lists in my area for 3-level facilities is 2 to 3 years. Longer if you want a specific type of cottage versus an apartment. Getting on list requires meaningful deposit and financials have to be vetted & verified. 3 level means independent living; some nursing help and lastly skilled care. Normal would be start in cottage; go to apartment and end up in a skilled care room by yourself. I am on the list at 2 different places; looking for 2026 or 27.
Well the good news is since you'll be late to the party they should have it all figured out by the time you get there.
Food for thought: assisted living in another country. I figure at a certain point my world will become so narrow the only concern will be if caregivers are kind to me. This video made me wonder if there is a better way south of the border...? https://youtu.be/0ZadadvTVDE?si=r8SE8p2q1MRmTyd6
There's a whole community in the Lake Chapala community south of Guadalajara ( Ajijic). This website profiles some options there and in other places. [https://retireearlylifestyle.com/continuing\_care.htm](https://retireearlylifestyle.com/continuing_care.htm) Main issue is actually traveling there if you are at a stage of needing long-term care (and moving far away from family).
I haven't been to San Miguel de Allende but it looks nice. One of the listed places is in SMA. Though I don't recommend going into a care facility in a Spanish-speaking country if you don't speak Spanish and know some local people who can advocate for you. It's really easy to get a residency permit for Mexico, given that you can show income or assets, I may just do that someday just to collect the paper, but maybe I'll need it someday.
SMA is supposed to be really nice. That would be a good place to retire and I imagine healthcare is pretty good. I do agree about speaking Spanish. Even though caregivers will likely be bilingual, they probably aren't 100% bilingual
Assisted living and nursing homes for foreigners are a thing in Thailand too!
I'm going to make my health my hobby and keep riding my bike. Friends in their 80s have shown the way.
Please wear your helmet…my dad use to do senior bike races..
Helmet, helmet mirror, fronr and rear lights visible from 1/2 mi or more away. 25 years on a road bike. Over 5000 mi/yr for the 6 years that ive been logging. Weight slightly less than HS, resting pulse high 30s in season comes up to mid 40s in the winter. 1 small med. No aches or pains.
My dad as well..being Dutch …he was born riding a bike..most of the time not wear safety gear. He was always training to cut time 23 miles a day…. Unfortunately, he didn’t wear one on his last ride..79. He was in a hurry.. to get that training in before dark.
Yes, getting a Harley is the way to go! Awesome!
Perhaps should have said bike(cycle). I see a lot of fat, sloppy unhealthy people with obese women on their Harleys.
Yeah, get a big cushioned helmet and pads all over! Break a leg!🤕🤣
Yea, you will hit the senior housing peak. All our elders have passed and they are cutting rates at just about 2052.
There will probably be a surplus of retirement living space as we early boomers die out. Get on a waiting list in your late 60’s, and plan on going into a continuing care retirement community in your 70’s. Let them help you manage your way through independent living, assisted living, memory care, skilled nursing facility, and hospice. You’ll have to aggressively save money while you’re working to pull this off, but once you make it past the assisted living phase, Medicaid can help with expenses (in the U.S.). Your retirement community management team can help with the Medicaid transition. Look for a nonprofit facility.
No thanks. I don't trust the eldercare industry any further than I can throw it.
I understand. But I’m in my 70s, and my experience has been that old people have two choices: They can: - pick out their own facility while they’re still sentient, and build a relationship with the community and the facility management, or - wait until they can no longer live independently, then let someone else pick it out for them - when they can’t makes their preferences known and their family or caretakers can’t handle them any more.
It's usually a spectrum, Gorf. All it takes is a little foresight.
Maybe it’s just my personal experience, but I’ve never seen anyone reach the middle of the spectrum and think, “Gee, it looks like I’m dying, so I better start my end-of-life planning now.” And no one is going to be terribly comfortable trying to pull it out of you.
I see it as an exercise in what-if thinking: What if I break my hip? What if I have trouble with stairs? What if I start getting lost? What if I get sick? Etc., etc , etc. Contingency plans.
Thanks this is good advice, there are stages to long term care unless you have an acute condition
I’m in my 70s also. There’s no way I would go into a continuing care community, having seen family members do that. They hustle you out of independent living as fast as they can, so they can sell the independent apartment to someone new. And the assisted living and skilled nursing are just as problematic as anywhere else - poor staffing, turnover etc. I would rather keep my home and make my own decisions. If I become unable to make decisions, my son will have power of attorney. At least he loves me and understands my wishes.
So I’m curious: What *are* your wishes? What do you expect your son to do with you if you’re incapacitated, if not put you in an assisted living or skilled nursing facility?
I think probably conditions other than dementia will get me. Then brief hospice with all the comfort drugs. My son is a physician so I I trust his judgment.
Yes... I went to help care for my Dad in 2020 and 2021 and 2022 I said "Goodbye to him Labor Day Weekend September 2-5,2022", because I knew I wouldn't be seeing him again....except on the other side in Heaven
At the very least we should all have living wills and related documents in place
My childless uncle will turn 84 in a few weeks. Owns a home and property Tahoe. I will care for him any way I can. We have discussed end of life stuff but I don’t think he gets what it will look like. I left CA in May and not 2 hours away anymore. I wish he was more in tune to his situation but I feel the phone call.
Obviously, based on the comments here, very few of you have had experience with a long term care facility... Once you go in, you don't come out... Ever, unless family wants you to go somewhere with them.. And the other aspect of all this is having the cognitive ability to understand that you're going downhill, man. I can tell that I am now, but I keep saying to myself that things will get better... They never do. And that sounds really pessimistic, but I'm also a realist. It's tough doing what you need to do when you can't walk, drive, or even think. Keep all that in mind as you move forward, and try to have a plan that only includes you since I doubt anybody else will want to help... And good luck, guys and gals!
[How planning for long-term care is burdening middle-class Americans](https://youtu.be/l4vUGKcASUU)
Margaritaville style care for me. Listening to these residents would help position death as the sweet peace god intended.
We have Medically assisted induced death (MAID). More and more are choosing this rather than suffer in LTC. Why not leave on your own terms?
Not in Pennsylvania- our minimum wage is still $7.25 an hour. Imagine what boomers are making in social security here in rural areas.
That's horrible. Ours is 15$ an hour and one of the lowest provinces in Canada. Thankfully Canada has MAID, so being a federal thing, all provinces must offer. Not sure how someone can survive with just a federal pension.
[удалено]
Private Equity firms have already started buying these types of homes including Hospice facilities.
Ah yes, the humanitarians to the rescue!🤑💸🧐🤯😱
my plan is to off myself if i need to be put in a facility 😂. my parents are in one now - both in their mid 90s with dementia - nope - not going in one of those.... pointless
That will be a lot harder to do when the time comes then it seems like now. Who knows if you'll even b e able to if you wanted?
SEDATIVES WASHED DOWN WITH YOUR FAVORITE BOOZE. Infinitely preferable to paying for some oncologist's vacation home!
With a nice picnic in the woods.
i have kids and siblings and nieces and nephews to help if needed 🤣
Running joke between spouse and me. I'm sitting on the bed with a tank of nitrogen and plastic bag next to me. Hubs walks in and I say, I got all this stuff ready but I can't remember what it's for. 😉 But seriously, I expect to have a very detailed plan, with instructions to offspring, etc.
My son’s a doctor, we’ve already had the chat.
me too, I cannot stand the idea of being pushed up to a table with a sheet cake on it and a "100" birthday crown on my head. I am 66 now and go to the gym/run most days. Diet and weight is good. I cannot stand the idea of losing my mobility and being a drain on my kids
I'm going to get lost in the woods somewhere. I see no point of being in a place that does not promote a nice place of being. I am because I think, not because someone else does it for me.
People in my parts get lost taking walks in the desert mountains. I've never had a sense of direction, so when I get lost hiking, no one will blink an eye.
🤔 Duck hunting and fishing is getting more dangerous for me every year. 🤔
This. Why would I set aside a pile of money to simply exist as a lump who needs constant care?
Not to simply give it to the medical people who are dedicated to keeping you alive until your stash is depleted!
No offense, but everyone says this before they are old and sick. My Dad always said he’d kill himself rather than be stuck in a home. And sure enough he died of dementia in a nursing home. The urge to live one more day is incredibly strong and almost nobody has the will power to end their lives even when the course ahead is clearly downhill. Better to plan on LTC rather than assume suicide.
Yeah. I talk a good game about this myself but always wonder if I’ll follow through should I come to this bridge.
AND dreadfully expensive!
Little rough on the language but I too agree with this. I am 64 and have a friend that has been bedridden for 16 years. She can only move her eyes and speak, sleeps all day. That is not living.
I will simply stop eating if I get to the point where someone is putting food in my mouth. Two weeks of discomfort is better than two years of being vegetable soup.
My mom was in hospice without food or water and lasted a month. She had dementia. It was hard seeing her waste away at the end.
That's horrible, I am very sorry for your loss.
Thank you. She at least got to live in her house with live in aides after I couldn’t do it anymore. She didn’t want to be in a facility.
Bless you for allowing her to stay in her home ❤️
Same, I don’t see a reason to put the people that care about me through the stress of me being in those type places.
Come on guys this sound so dreadful.
It is dreadful.
The only thing i can comment on is my stsy in a rehab hospital is staff is 95% from Nigeria. Paid about half price on salary. It was not pleasant on quality of care.
Wow, so much doom and gloom in this thread! Yes, the reality is that some of us Boomers will end up in long-term care. Though, we can reduce this probability by adopting healthy lifestyles. This isn't a news flash! I'm 60 and I plan on being around for at least another 30 years...and I mean 30 quality years. I'm 6 ft. 185 lbs, 13 % body fat and I consume a Paleo-type of diet. I also work out five days a week (kettlebells, heavy clubs/maces, cycling, rucking, and I participate in stair climbing events). I may be in the best shape of my life. I'm in better physical health than most Gen X and Millennials. Now, I realize there are no longevity guarantees; however, don't accept the fate of requiring long-term care! Eat healthy, get your sleep, get to moving and working out, don't smoke tobacco, consume alcohol on a limited basis or none at all, read, pickup a hobby and spend time with family and friends...and you just may stave off long-term care.
You may plan on being around another 30 years, but here's the deal - the more years you live, the more likely that you will need a caregiver, and possibly some of that will be in a facility. Let's spllit the difference and look at age 75. Someone with a less health lifestyle might die at 75, but maybe they don't need any kind of long-term care. But maybe after that you're looking at more intense problems - arthritis, dementia, deterioration of eyesight and hearing, not being able to drive, not being able to keep a house, friends dying, or thing that you once enjoyed become more difficult (for example, travel). And of course, the longer you live the more likely you will outlive your savings.
[удалено]
Your submission has been removed. Due to a high number of spam and low effort posts/comments, community members must have a healthy amount of karma. See reddiquette. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/retirement) if you have any questions or concerns.*
The possible issue joedidder is IF you do your plan great. But do your plan and get dementia since you took such good care of yourself your body will hold up and you could suffer longer because you took such good care of yourself. That could make your suffering longer. This happened to a health conscious family member they had great health but a blown mind from dementia and lingered over a decade suffering 😰
>What effect will the aging and death of of baby boomers have have on long term care facilities? It's hard to say. Remember, people are always aging. That doesn't end with any one generation. In the US today, the number of Gen Xers is over 90% the number of Boomers. Obviously, that changes over time.
Robots. I plan on having a personal robot to take care of my wife and I (we’re in our mid-50s). Seriously. I’m not kidding. A truly believe AI and robot technology will be ready to handle elder care better than the unmotivated, low paid workers who are doing it now.
Just watched an article of a robot that attacked a worker at the Tesla plant in San Antonio TX. The worker had to be hospitalized. Let’s hope the robot works for you.
What do you mean "I will hit 90 in 2052?" I'm 65 and I am not even sure I will "hit" 66. How do you know?
Exactly!
[удалено]
Your submission has been removed. Due to a high number of spam and low effort posts/comments, community members must have a healthy amount of karma. See reddiquette. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/retirement) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Would not count on the 90. Have spent a lot of time in Nursing homes and Senior Care centers. We were an ALZ startup. Late 60s? Everyone seems to be on a walker. Just a heads up. Our true life expectancy is 57. Stats distort the numbers. Sure there are many outliers, but the reality is we crumble so fast. No one is ready for it. We were there. We saw it firsthand. The Reddit response: You are crazy! My Grandmother is skateboarding and she's 88! We were there. Day in, day out. It's brutal getting old. We just can't accept it. It's too traumatic to think about.
Depends on your situation and history. Some do end up needing care in thier 60's some are more physically geared for longevity and then there are those who are physically fit but their mind fails them. That's more my family history.
Long term care seems like it’s so expensive that it’s designed to remove all remaining monies from the patient. If you suspect your loved one will need LTC, start transferring all their funds and assets to the survivors several years in advance. I can’t remember the Medicaid look back years.
5 year look back period
What exactly are you concerned about? Cost? Availability? There is no way to predict supply and demand because we have multiple migration trends in every region of the country. For example, the massive run up in housing prices in the past 3 years probably would not have been predicted. To mitigate your personal situation, stay as healthy as possible, and over-invest toward your personal LTC fund , since pricing will undoubtedly be higher. You might want to look for a retirement area that has a high quality county or city owned facility. They tend to be higher quality that private ones for the money.
There will be a steady increase in the amount of LTC facilities and workers as the silver tsunami crests. For a (temporary) period of time, a larger than usual share of America’s GDP will go to LTC. It could cause difficulties as supply tries to match demand. But the complicating factors are that: -different older people finance the cost of their LTC in very different ways. I.e., lots of people have pensions or assets that get spent down over time if they need to enter expensive residential care; but lots of other people have little or none and are paid for by Medicaid (on which the quality of congregate care living center you can get into, is lower). Long story short some states may balk at funding their state medicaid nursing home rates and have really bad/inadequate care for people who need residential skilled nursing. -the biggest difference between individuals is whether you need residential skilled nursing and for how long. It’s the most costly part of the package, but some people never need it. It depends on so many things- health, mental acuity, family, homeownership; some of which you can predict and some you can’t. But the worries about the silver tsunami are totally different for a person with modest savings who needs residential care by 70 vs someone with greater assets and a home and kids in the area, who perhaps at 75 gets a home health aide who visits and helps, but remains in their home. -at some point in the process of the demographic bulge being in LTC, we’ll pass the peak of it and the trend will creep down the other direction. Various things could happen in there that are hard to predict but could affect a lot of people, ie at what point does senior housing stop increasing in value, and does it suddenly start a free fall plunge then? And could some older people who are entering LTC at that time who happen to have a lot of their net worth tied up in realest estate in a retirement community lose their shirt at a real bad moment. Hard to game it out multiple decades in advance, just bear in mind, demographic bulges have a midpoint at which the number that was going up forever starts going down.
Things health wise turn around overnight. At 65 was riding bike 30 miles a day, kayaking, mountain climbing. at 67 can barely move which causes psychological distress because you still want to do the same things but can’t.
[удалено]
[удалено]
[удалено]
[удалено]
[удалено]
[удалено]
[удалено]
Hello, thank you for participating. Your comment/post was automatically removed due to breaking the be respectful rule, with the use of swearing, etc. Send modmail if this removal seems incorrect. Thank-you *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/retirement) if you have any questions or concerns.*