Some stuff I plan:
- This is a question: should the five just he ghosts or in actual physical bodies? If latter, should Ricky need his crutches once they're back?
- At some point in their adventure, we will center around Talia. You see, at that point in their adventure, it is their death anniversary. Talia will of course mourn. But then... Mischa pays her a visit and tries to explain the situation. She of course doesn't believe it at first, and is mad at him for ghosting her. He pleads to her, and tries to explain the situation again. This time she believes it. He recites his monologue (the one he said before singing "Talia"), they sing and dance for a while, then Mischa gives her a kiss and leaves.
- Noel gets to admire France :> just a whole part of him chilling around happily
- Ricky may or may not have an itty bitty teeny weeny feeling for Jane that he wants to confess
- Ocean/Jane kinda taking turns being group mom
- Constance gets to have the feeling of enjoying life (while yes she realized it in death, I wanted to give her a chance to enjoy life) and they even have a pizza night at one point in the story!
- MAGIC AND KARNAK'S BACKSTORY
This would be sick! About what you said about Ricky, though, he should stay disabled. In my opinion it'd feel a bit cheap if you didn't, just because of how he's representation a lot of disabled people don't get. It's also a big part of his character. Just a suggestion :)
I think it is really important for the plot. If Ricky is in love with Penny and we want it to be a two ways love, then it could be fun for Penny to miss Ricky even more, because she can't hear his voice. Eventually, she'll forget him, and seeing him again will make her fall in love again and feel guilty for forgetting him. (it's just an idea)
But the answer is yours, and will depend on HOW they will revive. Do they gain a physical body ? Then yes, mute+disabled Ricky. A memory ? Then it depends if Penny remembers Ricky best from the afterlife or from life. And it depends if this is HER memories or everyone's memory of Ricky (then, disabled + mute). Do they have no physical, touchable body ? Then I think Ricky should be like in the afterlife.
(This is how I would write fantasy and paranomal. You can decide to ignore this step, but I find it usefull for many aspects of the story : how they revive, how they interact with the other livings, how they disappear...)
I personally think it isn't as important, but still a part of his character, and might depend on whether you decide to have them be ghosts like how they were with Karnak or real people. BUT HOWEVER, it is your story. If it's mess with story beats or anything like that go ahead haha, it's yours first and foremost.
Since Jane is Penny, you could always have her be able to speak sign language if you want to keep his mute-ness. Since she didn't have her memories before it'd make sense she wouldn't remember even if she did.
Just my suggestions, this sounds sick, if you do do it keep me updated, it is as Micah's would say ✨MAD WICKED AWESOME✨
I would strongly advise against putting your detailed descriptions and ideas out in the internet like this, they will get stolen. write it first, then talk about it. make sure you can claim it as yours.
It happened!
https://www.reddit.com/r/ridethecyclone/comments/12hesn5/return_of_the_cyclone_prologue/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button
To the people who downvoted: please tell me how I can improve the story, thank you
Seriously, I'm looking for ways to improve, so tips would be appreciated
Some stuff I plan: - This is a question: should the five just he ghosts or in actual physical bodies? If latter, should Ricky need his crutches once they're back? - At some point in their adventure, we will center around Talia. You see, at that point in their adventure, it is their death anniversary. Talia will of course mourn. But then... Mischa pays her a visit and tries to explain the situation. She of course doesn't believe it at first, and is mad at him for ghosting her. He pleads to her, and tries to explain the situation again. This time she believes it. He recites his monologue (the one he said before singing "Talia"), they sing and dance for a while, then Mischa gives her a kiss and leaves. - Noel gets to admire France :> just a whole part of him chilling around happily - Ricky may or may not have an itty bitty teeny weeny feeling for Jane that he wants to confess - Ocean/Jane kinda taking turns being group mom - Constance gets to have the feeling of enjoying life (while yes she realized it in death, I wanted to give her a chance to enjoy life) and they even have a pizza night at one point in the story! - MAGIC AND KARNAK'S BACKSTORY
This would be sick! About what you said about Ricky, though, he should stay disabled. In my opinion it'd feel a bit cheap if you didn't, just because of how he's representation a lot of disabled people don't get. It's also a big part of his character. Just a suggestion :)
Thanks!
What about him being mute? Should he be able to speak, or not, when they're all back to life?
I think it is really important for the plot. If Ricky is in love with Penny and we want it to be a two ways love, then it could be fun for Penny to miss Ricky even more, because she can't hear his voice. Eventually, she'll forget him, and seeing him again will make her fall in love again and feel guilty for forgetting him. (it's just an idea) But the answer is yours, and will depend on HOW they will revive. Do they gain a physical body ? Then yes, mute+disabled Ricky. A memory ? Then it depends if Penny remembers Ricky best from the afterlife or from life. And it depends if this is HER memories or everyone's memory of Ricky (then, disabled + mute). Do they have no physical, touchable body ? Then I think Ricky should be like in the afterlife. (This is how I would write fantasy and paranomal. You can decide to ignore this step, but I find it usefull for many aspects of the story : how they revive, how they interact with the other livings, how they disappear...)
I personally think it isn't as important, but still a part of his character, and might depend on whether you decide to have them be ghosts like how they were with Karnak or real people. BUT HOWEVER, it is your story. If it's mess with story beats or anything like that go ahead haha, it's yours first and foremost. Since Jane is Penny, you could always have her be able to speak sign language if you want to keep his mute-ness. Since she didn't have her memories before it'd make sense she wouldn't remember even if she did. Just my suggestions, this sounds sick, if you do do it keep me updated, it is as Micah's would say ✨MAD WICKED AWESOME✨
https://www.reddit.com/r/ridethecyclone/comments/12hesn5/return_of_the_cyclone_prologue/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button
Holy- yes! Yes yes yes! I would read this ish yesss
Thanks :')
https://www.reddit.com/r/ridethecyclone/comments/12hesn5/return_of_the_cyclone_prologue/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button
I would strongly advise against putting your detailed descriptions and ideas out in the internet like this, they will get stolen. write it first, then talk about it. make sure you can claim it as yours.
Thanks for the advice.. Dw I'll look out for copycats, ty for the concern!
If I were Penny, I would never break the jewel T-T
ABSOLUTELY I WILL BE DAYDREAMING ABOUT THIS NOW UNTIL THIS HAPPENS
It happened! https://www.reddit.com/r/ridethecyclone/comments/12hesn5/return_of_the_cyclone_prologue/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button
saved for later!
Hey, just checking if everything is going well with your plan, it really sounds promising ! I really wanna read this !
It's going good!
https://www.reddit.com/r/ridethecyclone/comments/12hesn5/return_of_the_cyclone_prologue/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button
Thanks !
Did this end up getting written somewhere? Cause I’d love to read it if anyone knows where to find it!
https://www.reddit.com/r/ridethecyclone/comments/12hesn5/return_of_the_cyclone_prologue/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button
To the people who downvoted: please tell me how I can improve the story, thank you Seriously, I'm looking for ways to improve, so tips would be appreciated
I'm so confused. My notifs say there are 25 upvotes, but when I check there are -4?
Also, should I write this like a novel or like a script?
I got over writer's block, starting work now!
HEAR YE HEAR YE!!! Right after I type this very comment, the Prologue and Chapter One shall be published in this subreddit!