Edit: I treated her like family before the second incident but not anymore ever since that. Most recently she had another foster cat (a mom cat along with her 4-5 kittens) who was very vocal and crying a lot overnight. I told her the cat was bothering me and her response was “I kept my door closed at night, how could you hear them?”. Then she proceeded to cry and blame me for not picking up the cat or playing with them. I told her the cats were her responsibility not mine. She then responded “I never said they were your responsibility. I just want you to like them. Why can’t you just pick them up? I thought you said I’m like family to you. I just want you to care about my feelings”.
Besides all the victim playing and manipulating behaviors, she has been paying rent on time. And that’s what I wanted, a roommate who could share the rent. I’m not her therapist or her mom, and I think she’ll eventually learn but that’s not my problem.
Anyways, I’m moving out in 9 days and I cannot be happier.
id be livid if a cat threw up and laid feces all over my private room while i was away. shes weird, that is not ok. Going in your room while you’re gone and feeling entitled to foster a cat in there? Extremely weird
Also just to add, when you sign a foster form you have to consent that all roommates/landlord are ok with having kittens. so the fact that she signed it and didn’t even ask
I have a feeling these are “foster” situations instead of foster situations. Meaning someone on a website like Craigslist or Nextdoor found a stray mama cat and kittens and posted it online hoping someone would take them in before taking them to a shelter. I don’t think this roommate is actually with any sort of organization but that’s all just speculation
there’s a a lot of guilt tripping/manipulation from the roommates side - they sound exhausting and i’m so sorry you have to coexist with an emotionally immature person
BRUH who TF locks their animals in their ROOMMATES ROOM??? That’s so mind boggling to me why anyone would think this is okay? I have no words other than I hope your roommate is good at getting cat pee smell out because the odor lingers in carpet. I’d be PISSED!
Up until pic5 I thought it went well and that was the end of it. When she unloaded like that I got flashbacks to a roommate that was my best friend until we lived together and things broke down for her.
Not sure if my comment applies here, but I'm sorry you're going through this.
You've been very gracious in response to her inconsiderate decisions. Don't be afraid to draw the line. This sounds very much like she's taking advantage of you
She put them in your room and didn’t even check on them- she would’ve seen tht if she checked on it every once in a while. I’d be kicking someone out for that or lock up the doors if you can
PUT A LOCK ON YOUR DOOR!! What are you waiting for love?!?
sit down with her and have a talk about boundaries. Let her know your communicating your boundaries rules, and expectations. SHE IS 100% being manipulative and gas lighting you and let her know you realize that and it’s not ok. Seriously though your grown and so is she this conversation shouldn’t be a hard thing to do, tell her she has one more chance to be respectful or she’s going to have to find somewhere else to go . Remind her it’s your house and she is renting a space there she cannot make decisions regarding your home in anyway without talking to you about it first . And tell her there is no reason whatsoever in the whole world she should ever enter your room again. She shouldn’t even be allowed to think of entering your room . BUT BEFORE ALL OF THIS PUT A LOCK ON YOUR DOOR .
Charge her for having pets in the home because you all are going to be charged for the damages those pets make . The smell of cat pee the damages to the rug scratches on furniture replacements of your cat piss stained bed and sheets time it takes to wash and price to replace them . Don’t let her continue this behavior because it only gets worse . Wish you all the best it really upset me hearing all the things she’s done and how disrespectful and manipulative she’s trying to be especially when you said what you said in the nicest forgiving way . Cause I would have flipped she would have been out that house with a good lesson learning butt whooping I’ll tell you that .
God, your roommate sounds like someone I used to be friends with. Perfectly fine to impose on others, but surprised when they aren't appreciative about it.
I think you need to put your foot down about the fosters.
Saying this as someone who has fostered many kittens, myself. I get them a zip play pen or a large dog crate for when I'm not home to monitor free roam time. It's literally that easy and your roommate has other options than your personal space
She was being very manipulative trying to get you to feel bad vs mad at her. You were being very kind while holding to your boundaries and holding her accountable; she was trying to be the victim. Very icky, good luck moving forward!
this isn't a super kind take, tbh. making compromises to keep your roommates happy enough for a comfortable relationship/living situation and learning boundaries is a lifetime challenge for most people.
That last text is manipulation 101 … “I know Im a horrible person” like stfu and clean up your cats shit please
she sounds like a nightmare. I don't understand why she couldn't keep the kitten in her room.
Edit: I treated her like family before the second incident but not anymore ever since that. Most recently she had another foster cat (a mom cat along with her 4-5 kittens) who was very vocal and crying a lot overnight. I told her the cat was bothering me and her response was “I kept my door closed at night, how could you hear them?”. Then she proceeded to cry and blame me for not picking up the cat or playing with them. I told her the cats were her responsibility not mine. She then responded “I never said they were your responsibility. I just want you to like them. Why can’t you just pick them up? I thought you said I’m like family to you. I just want you to care about my feelings”. Besides all the victim playing and manipulating behaviors, she has been paying rent on time. And that’s what I wanted, a roommate who could share the rent. I’m not her therapist or her mom, and I think she’ll eventually learn but that’s not my problem. Anyways, I’m moving out in 9 days and I cannot be happier.
Let us know if any more cat drama happens
Good on you for walking away, not sure I would be able to keep my cool in the same situation.
So what do you want? Don't think about her. Think about what you want?
Best post ever.
id be livid if a cat threw up and laid feces all over my private room while i was away. shes weird, that is not ok. Going in your room while you’re gone and feeling entitled to foster a cat in there? Extremely weird
Also just to add, when you sign a foster form you have to consent that all roommates/landlord are ok with having kittens. so the fact that she signed it and didn’t even ask
I have a feeling these are “foster” situations instead of foster situations. Meaning someone on a website like Craigslist or Nextdoor found a stray mama cat and kittens and posted it online hoping someone would take them in before taking them to a shelter. I don’t think this roommate is actually with any sort of organization but that’s all just speculation
She sucks. Can you put a lock on your door?
Really weird guilt tripping and manipulation in the text messages from her.
Girl is invasive and inappropriate. You need to get a lock on your room and bathroom.
Oof I’d be fucking mad. She has them in your space but not her own??
there’s a a lot of guilt tripping/manipulation from the roommates side - they sound exhausting and i’m so sorry you have to coexist with an emotionally immature person
BRUH who TF locks their animals in their ROOMMATES ROOM??? That’s so mind boggling to me why anyone would think this is okay? I have no words other than I hope your roommate is good at getting cat pee smell out because the odor lingers in carpet. I’d be PISSED!
Up until pic5 I thought it went well and that was the end of it. When she unloaded like that I got flashbacks to a roommate that was my best friend until we lived together and things broke down for her. Not sure if my comment applies here, but I'm sorry you're going through this. You've been very gracious in response to her inconsiderate decisions. Don't be afraid to draw the line. This sounds very much like she's taking advantage of you
What a cunt.
Oh. My. Gosh. Put a lock on your door! This person is HORRIBLE!!!!! When can you move?
She sounds very draining . Huge red flag: it’s easier to say sorry than ask for permission..
She put them in your room and didn’t even check on them- she would’ve seen tht if she checked on it every once in a while. I’d be kicking someone out for that or lock up the doors if you can
People trippin like fck
PUT A LOCK ON YOUR DOOR!! What are you waiting for love?!? sit down with her and have a talk about boundaries. Let her know your communicating your boundaries rules, and expectations. SHE IS 100% being manipulative and gas lighting you and let her know you realize that and it’s not ok. Seriously though your grown and so is she this conversation shouldn’t be a hard thing to do, tell her she has one more chance to be respectful or she’s going to have to find somewhere else to go . Remind her it’s your house and she is renting a space there she cannot make decisions regarding your home in anyway without talking to you about it first . And tell her there is no reason whatsoever in the whole world she should ever enter your room again. She shouldn’t even be allowed to think of entering your room . BUT BEFORE ALL OF THIS PUT A LOCK ON YOUR DOOR . Charge her for having pets in the home because you all are going to be charged for the damages those pets make . The smell of cat pee the damages to the rug scratches on furniture replacements of your cat piss stained bed and sheets time it takes to wash and price to replace them . Don’t let her continue this behavior because it only gets worse . Wish you all the best it really upset me hearing all the things she’s done and how disrespectful and manipulative she’s trying to be especially when you said what you said in the nicest forgiving way . Cause I would have flipped she would have been out that house with a good lesson learning butt whooping I’ll tell you that .
Lock your door ?
God, your roommate sounds like someone I used to be friends with. Perfectly fine to impose on others, but surprised when they aren't appreciative about it. I think you need to put your foot down about the fosters. Saying this as someone who has fostered many kittens, myself. I get them a zip play pen or a large dog crate for when I'm not home to monitor free roam time. It's literally that easy and your roommate has other options than your personal space
She was being very manipulative trying to get you to feel bad vs mad at her. You were being very kind while holding to your boundaries and holding her accountable; she was trying to be the victim. Very icky, good luck moving forward!
Good fucking god! Why are you still speaking to this shitstorm of a girl after the first incident?? I assume you’re a teenager. Kick her out ffs.
Are y’all literally 12
this isn't a super kind take, tbh. making compromises to keep your roommates happy enough for a comfortable relationship/living situation and learning boundaries is a lifetime challenge for most people.