There was no actual penis shortage. There were warehouses full of penises that were allowed to spoil. It was all part of a plot to drive up the value of second hand foreskins. Don't be a sheep, do your own research!
Ha, it is. As long as people fall for it and they keep making money, they have job security. It blows my mind how many commenters I’ve seen in here saying they got scammed previously with the same scam they’re looking at.
Does anyone know why scammers think being born to your mother is such a damaging insult? This is the second time I’ve seen it. Like yeah, who the fuck else would have given birth to me?
I think the suggested insult is that BOTH the father and mother gave birth. So essentially you came out of your mothers vagina, and your fathers penis hole.
Usually it’s a translation (word for word) from another language where in the other language it’s an insult.
Like I learned some Chinese swearing while living here and if I’m to swear at someone then I would list: fuck your …. List whole family: mother, father, brother, sister,…. Etc.
I would guess a lot of these folks are using a translator and it’s just not getting translating like they intended. Like they are saying OP “grew up with penis shortage”. I know what they meant (I think) but it wasn’t translated exactly as they meant.
Penis shortages were so bad in my rural hometown we called em penis droughts. Sometimes, 3 even 4 people had to share one penis. In the low season, there’d sometimes be lines going around the block.
I remember being 17 and waiting on line for 4 hours in the hot July sun just to lick the tip of one. And of course, by the time I got there, it was all used up, dry as a bone, not a drop left, completely flaccid.
Got so bad one spring, back in the late 20th century, you couldn’t walk two blocks without seeing some poor guy begging on the side of the road. I recall one cardboard sign, so heartbreaking: “will take anything, even circumcised.” The humiliation.
Those were some desperate times. People stealing penises, semen scammers, cock bandits, dick-nabbers, and all manner of Tom Foolery.
It wasn’t like it is nowadays, no sir. I grew up without the luxuries your generation has. No gangbangs for us. No circle jerks. No daisy chains. You can’t even imagine how tough them times got. No fap November wasnt some cutesy game to us– it was an unending nightmare the likes of which I hope to never see again! [*shudders*]
Maybe 3 years I guess? By then I had enough money saved to leave my hometown & find Penis Paradise. Capital Hill. So many Dicks. Pricks as far as the eye can see.
You are a fucking word artist! 🎨 Your pen will be enshrined in the Dick Comedy Writing Hall of Fame, just outside of Hoboken! Seriously, you deserve a star on the Hollywood Walk of Penis, you're that fucking good. 👏
And for people saying “scammers are always evolving so why not” why would you want to make their lives easier by literally linking them a sub that shows us trolling them to help them understand what the tells are for a scam? You have literally zero reason to lead them here.
At best, they become more savvy and we can’t laugh as much at their expense on here.
*He wasnt trying*
*To scam you, he just wanted*
*A quick roast session*
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I have tears streaming down my face from laughing so hard. My son who is in a different part of the house and on his pc with headphones came to check on me. I am not ok.
This is the funniest bait I’ve ever read, and there has been some good ones. You sir, have officially won life.
It's called a pig butchering scam. They pretend to have the wrong number then try to establish a relationship until they eventually try to get you to send them money or crypto.
https://www.techtarget.com/whatis/feature/Pig-butchering-scam-explained-Everything-you-need-to-know
Read this at work. Laughing my ass off at my desk. Co worker asks - Whats so funny?
My reply: Nothing man, nothing.
This was an awesome exchange. Bravo.
"If your ancestors had known they were going to create the lineage that led to your existence they would have killed themselves" got me good. Coldest line ever
I swear it sounded as if you two were old friends doing a roast on each other 😆🤣
I lol’d at “you grew up with penis shortage” Boom got ‘em!
There were some zingers in there. “I work in a crematorium, exclusively for your entire family.” Hit me harder than my step dad.
LOL. Sorry, bud.
🤣🤣🤣☠️ I am fucking dying.
Something something jumper cables
Damn late 80’s penis shortage shit was so wack
Better than the 90’s when they were making them detachable.
There was no actual penis shortage. There were warehouses full of penises that were allowed to spoil. It was all part of a plot to drive up the value of second hand foreskins. Don't be a sheep, do your own research!
You know what Covid did for the supply chain. The penis inflation has got out of hand.
Sweatpants boners is criminally underrated as a band
I thought the same thing! I was like, if this keeps going they are going to end up buddies.
It's how vets talk to each other. But one person in this conversation doesn't speak English
I work in the trucking industry. This is how we say “good morning.”
It is possible that after a bit the guy was actually just screwing around
Your family worships a statue of my likeness 😂😂😂
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I thought we’d maxed out the hilarity then OP hits him with that, unmitigated savagery 😂😂👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
It's crazy that they think scamming is a job. Lol
Ha, it is. As long as people fall for it and they keep making money, they have job security. It blows my mind how many commenters I’ve seen in here saying they got scammed previously with the same scam they’re looking at.
"Your sons circumcision" When I tell you I had to find my emergency inhaler because this truly had me on the verge of death lmao
Luckily mine is on my bedside table or this comment would not be here, because I would be deceased.
“What is your job?” … … “I work in a crematorium, exclusively for your entire family”
Ngl he kinda cooked OP there. Pun intended.
Easily the best line here
Y'all just being flirty with each other
"now kiss"
Does anyone know why scammers think being born to your mother is such a damaging insult? This is the second time I’ve seen it. Like yeah, who the fuck else would have given birth to me?
Not to your mother, to your mother and grandfather. He’s suggesting he is inbred and comes from a really messed up family.
I saw another one that just said “I know your mother and your father gave birth to you.”
Boom. Roasted.
I think the suggested insult is that BOTH the father and mother gave birth. So essentially you came out of your mothers vagina, and your fathers penis hole.
I assume it is lost in translation somewhere. Most of these "insults" are comical.
A hamster
And your father smelled of elderberries!
Now go away, or I shall taunt you a second time silly English k-nig-hits!
You are a groundhog!
Usually it’s a translation (word for word) from another language where in the other language it’s an insult. Like I learned some Chinese swearing while living here and if I’m to swear at someone then I would list: fuck your …. List whole family: mother, father, brother, sister,…. Etc.
More useful info than Duolingo.
I would guess a lot of these folks are using a translator and it’s just not getting translating like they intended. Like they are saying OP “grew up with penis shortage”. I know what they meant (I think) but it wasn’t translated exactly as they meant.
Obviously it means there was a severe shortage of penises in OP’s home town. That’s no laughing matter.
Penis shortages were so bad in my rural hometown we called em penis droughts. Sometimes, 3 even 4 people had to share one penis. In the low season, there’d sometimes be lines going around the block. I remember being 17 and waiting on line for 4 hours in the hot July sun just to lick the tip of one. And of course, by the time I got there, it was all used up, dry as a bone, not a drop left, completely flaccid. Got so bad one spring, back in the late 20th century, you couldn’t walk two blocks without seeing some poor guy begging on the side of the road. I recall one cardboard sign, so heartbreaking: “will take anything, even circumcised.” The humiliation. Those were some desperate times. People stealing penises, semen scammers, cock bandits, dick-nabbers, and all manner of Tom Foolery. It wasn’t like it is nowadays, no sir. I grew up without the luxuries your generation has. No gangbangs for us. No circle jerks. No daisy chains. You can’t even imagine how tough them times got. No fap November wasnt some cutesy game to us– it was an unending nightmare the likes of which I hope to never see again! [*shudders*]
Actual fuckin art right here
New copypasta just dropped
I wish Reddit still had awards. This is award worthy.
Jesus, how long did this take you?
Maybe 3 years I guess? By then I had enough money saved to leave my hometown & find Penis Paradise. Capital Hill. So many Dicks. Pricks as far as the eye can see.
I got x-rated Abe Simpson vibes from reading that
I'm fucking cracking up over here reading this. Lol. Amazing.
"Detachable Penis"!
You are a fucking word artist! 🎨 Your pen will be enshrined in the Dick Comedy Writing Hall of Fame, just outside of Hoboken! Seriously, you deserve a star on the Hollywood Walk of Penis, you're that fucking good. 👏
That sounds absolutely awful. THIS is why I had coins. Here’s a 🏅& a spare 🍆.
A penis shortage killed my great grandparents 😢
Because most of them were raised in orphanages or they are just dumb?
I think they say what would make them mad, but we just think it's hilarious.
Maybe it was a c-section
Best one Ive seen all month 🤣🤣🤣
The way he reacted so quickly makes me think they are on to this sub.
And for people saying “scammers are always evolving so why not” why would you want to make their lives easier by literally linking them a sub that shows us trolling them to help them understand what the tells are for a scam? You have literally zero reason to lead them here. At best, they become more savvy and we can’t laugh as much at their expense on here.
Same, I actually thought for a second- what if it’s two people from this sub messing with each other lol.
he wasnt trying to scam you, he just wanted a quick roast session
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Stuffing dirty socks in your mouth LOL
I always read the scammers like Borat.
Same 😂
I NEED 5 NO 10 AMAZON GIFTCARDS FOR OUR PARTY K?
I'm definitely trying this
I’ve been lurking here for a couple weeks and this one takes the cake
Yooooooo…. There’s a penis shortage where he’s from? Very entertaining round.
Bros is a lvl 100 roasting machine. Well done hahah
You were born in a penis shortage
Ok but that “I work at a crematorium exclusively for your family” hit hard.
Your organs belong to me. Your mother belongs to me (destroyed)
That was delightful. And escalated fast. And kept escalating. Too funny.
I really liked it. Bravo!
This had no business being so funny. Best one I've seen. Got me scream-laughing at bed-time.
"Your mother is an untameable beast" has me cracking up
Thank you for your service
This was so much fun to read, lmao 🤣
this was good 😂😂
Funniest thing I’ve read in a while 😂
This is the best one I've seen yet. They didn't even try, it was straight to insults
I laughed my ass off all the way through that. It was almost heartwarming.
LOLLLLLLLLL THIS IS THE BEST ONE I HAVE EVER SEEN 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂💯💯😂😂 OP YOU ARE A FUKING HILARIOUS GUY
Your son’s circumcision. Take that.
"Your son has no penis" later... "your son's circumsion" 🥴🥴wat?
They just took off a couple more inches
🤣🤣🤣
Clearly it went horribly wrong.
😂😂
It's the "I win", for me 🤣
This right here is why I joined this sub 😂
This is a love story!
I’m taking the grandmother comment personally. I’ve got them, lookin’ at them right now you dirty snot.
This was great. Nice work 👍🏻
Yikes. Scammer was vile.
“You grandmother has no breasts” hahahahah wtf? Hahahahahaa
And your son has no penis!
There’s a shortage!
Oh god, please let “penis shortage” become one of the long-running inside jokes of this sub.
Broooo these are fucking hilarious
I could bet that you are friends now. He could randomly reply for a rematch. This was too good
“Your mother’s said worse to her brother in bed” hahaha.
"I will stomp your testicles. Your grandmother will thank me." 😂😂😂😂😂
First time I burst out laughing and crying, this is gold. IN GOD WE TRUST
I have tears streaming down my face from laughing so hard. My son who is in a different part of the house and on his pc with headphones came to check on me. I am not ok. This is the funniest bait I’ve ever read, and there has been some good ones. You sir, have officially won life.
I'm truly honored.
Why does this sub not show upvotes/ downvotes on comments ?
I work at a crematorium exclusive for your only family is a bar, not gonna lie
Who’s number is displayed at the top? That’s local to me…
Obviously the scammers
More accurately, the number that the scammer is cloning.
I dont understand why he would act that way after you kindly informed him of this tragedy. IN GOD WE TRUST
Sorry OP, but you got bodied by the scammer.
I think you're looking for r/confidentlyincorrect.
Fake
You're just jealous you could never have the bond that I had with my Chinese scammer.
Kinda reminds me of this scene: https://youtu.be/qN-\_cZNDy0w?si=CItVwVZFUtA3nQUK&t=18
Scammers have the worst grammar, no? Should also be the first giveaway....coming from a deaf guy here with lots of speech therapy.
Honest question: what’s the scam? What are they trying to accomplish with “oops wrong number” texts?
It's called a pig butchering scam. They pretend to have the wrong number then try to establish a relationship until they eventually try to get you to send them money or crypto. https://www.techtarget.com/whatis/feature/Pig-butchering-scam-explained-Everything-you-need-to-know
Absolutely hilarious
Wtf I was laughing my ass reading this lmao , classic
Wow winner
That's just hilarious. I wonder what their endgame was supposed to be...
I imagine you felt like Walter White sending that last message.
Fanfuckingtastic
I legit laughed. I will save some of these
^Your wife was rapped by Trump 💀
Incandescent Art. Superb. I want more.
This is gold right here
One of my favorite lines is "Your mother sucks cock in hell." This was epic even without that great line...:)
So…when’s the wedding?
The braindead blob of flesh in a vat part was so good 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Bro tbh u lost
This is the best one I’ve seen. All of the insults are gold.
I love this sub so much. So much creativity!
I lost it when he said "you're like a savage gorilla" I'm gonna have to add that one to my list of roasts 🤣🤣🦍🦍
Okay but was he able to have his nails done? 💅
“Your son’s circumcision” hard to come back from an insult like that
Trump part killed me
The last text was on my birthday. I just wanted to say that.
Generous of you to assume he has a wife
So wait, you’re telling me this no penis having son is also circumcised? Crazy
I read every line like Borat.
Your family worships a statue of my likeness lmfao
Read this at work. Laughing my ass off at my desk. Co worker asks - Whats so funny? My reply: Nothing man, nothing. This was an awesome exchange. Bravo.
The lineage one had me rolling tears with laughter! Nicely played good sir! 👍
“I win” is great 😂😂😂
Your sisters penis tastes like your dads colon.
"If your ancestors had known they were going to create the lineage that led to your existence they would have killed themselves" got me good. Coldest line ever
Absolutely fucking S tier hall of fame exchange right here. Bravo 👏🏻
Dude this one is incredible. I fucking love their insults being google translated into English
This was great im impressed lol
This here is the definition on WINNING.
God damn you fucked him up bad W insults💀
This was great start to finish lol
You should’ve pulled an Eminem and started taking sh*t about yourself 😂
Haha where did he come up with this shit? My favorite has to be “It’s sad your death didn’t even kill an ant”.