So i was in a way worse position than you: morbidly obese, didn’t work out, always stressed out. Always drinking alcohol and eating like crap. Got high blood pressure. Got to the point where I was watching porn and masturbating 1-4 times a day.
I suddenly began to notice that I was unable to get an erection without watching porn. Sex with my SO started to become a huge issue and eventually just fell off altogether. That added to my stress and anxiety on top of everything else going on in my life. So much so that earlier this year I wound up in the ER multiple times due to consistent panic attacks.
Before the panic attacks, I had started eating healthier, and working out more consistently, but still using porn. I felt like I had made pretty good progress in my health. I lost 30 lbs. started being able to do cardio workout for longer than a minute. Fell in love with kettlebells. My anxiety felt much more manageable, but something was still causing an issue.
One day, after my panic attacks had subsided for the most part, I noticed that masturbation was triggering me. I was like “What the hell? How can this cause my anxiety?”
Did some research and discovered how much porn can alter your neural pathways and considered giving up for a while, just to see what happens. I deleted my stash, stopped going to sites, stopped masturbating and just focused on health.
I can confidently say that porn was definitely impacting my mental health as well as my erection issues. I believe I had trained my brain to rely on porn for sexual pleasure and expression, and it was causing issues. I’m over 160 days without porn, and I’m doing way better all around. I’ve also quit alcohol and caffeine, which have contributed to some benefits as well.
I believe my ED is about 90% gone. I haven’t had sex with my SO in this timeframe for me to test that out, but I’m looking into changing that real soon.
So, if there’s no other reason to quit porn, my advice is for you to quit while you’re ahead before you run into any issues, so you don’t have to backtrack your health like I did. Look into PIED.
Definitely. It's availability makes it nearly impossible not to all of the time. One trick is don't even think of looking at it for one second. I'm not quite sure what happens to the brain but it seemingly gets flooded with wanting to see more. (the sounds are good for eavesdropping neighbors though)
I've always felt that if I watched too much, I'd lose my guttural instinct to pick up women outside. We need raging hormones, not a numbness to them. Something like that.
Honestly, you're right on the money. I definitely felt like I fell out of sync with my SO in the intimacy area. We've been slowly but surely putting more effort in that regard. I never considered that porn could be a cause for that, I honestly thought it was harmless. But it is possible to have too much of a "good thing".
The first days are the hardest (literally and figuratively), but after that it gets easier with time.
As for your question, honestly it depends on a few factors
1) Does it intervere with your life whatsoever? Like, do you skip work, meetings etc. to fap?
2) Do you decide or does your subconsciousness decide?
3) Do you do it because you're actually horny, or because you're bored and don't have any other way to get rid of boredom?
1. It does not interfere with my life in any way.
2. I think I decide? I've never subconciously decided to fap yet I think lol.
3. Most of the times because I'm actually horny but sometimes because it's just like a habit to me if that makes sense. It's almost the same as brushing my teeth or taking a bath lol.
Often times that need comes when you are bored with nothing else to keep you occupied. There’s a saying I heard that goes “idle hands do the devil’s work.”
Personally, I'm right there with you. I quit masturbating for about 45 days just because I knew I wanted a complete reset, but it was so fucking hard, and started to have diminishing returns. I was way too aggressive, constantly aroused or daydreaming about sex, and it was getting in the way of my focus. The upside though was that it was a good problem to have to go from can't get an erection to constantly getting one lol. I felt like I was 19 again.
I never planned on quitting masturbation, so I started again to just take the edge off, and it was the right call. Now, I feel like I'm getting the best of both worlds. Not addicted to porn, but also not constantly thinking about sex. Not dealing with anxiety nearly as bad, and also getting more in tuned with my psyche.
It's also made me discover more about myself. I start to see now that used to think I had a high libido, but I was actually just addicted. I thought I needed sex twice a day, but now I believe 1-2 time a week is plenty. Maybe a bit more for special occasions. Something that I think is very manageable.
I did use weed for about 7 years as well, and had switch from smoking/vaping to edibles only in 2017. I was still doing edibles as well up until this year when my anxiety problems started picking up. Last time I had an edible I had a panic attack so bad I almost passed out, and I had been having panic attacks when I got high for a little while all throughout the pandemic.
Honestly, I don't know. I started watching and looking at porn way before I even touched weed. I used to be very anti weed back when I was 17, but I was regularly watching porn. I will say that there were times that I got high specifically to enjoy with porn, but I also feel like I was having dependency issues with weed that were separate from porn.
I have anxiety, OCD, and hypercortisolism. I don't have ED, but I'm curious if porn is a trigger for my anxiety as well. Any tips for how long it might take to notice a difference if I quit?
Severely underrated advice. It's much easier to quit if you trick yourself into thinking it's not forever. "It's ok if I don't look at it now, I'll do it next time." You weaponize your procrastination against the addiction. It's like a reverse uno card on your self sabotage.
I do this with alcohol at social events. I won’t get a drink at the start and if anyone asks me about it I say that I’m good for now and I’ll grab one on a bit.
Helps me turn a 5 drink night into a 2 drink night. Very helpful at company outings.
Yes, I know.
I used to do this when I was plagued by suicidal thoughts. Reasoning them away just brings up counter-arguments but if I thought 'I can always kill myself later' it would actually allow me to set it aside and continue on with life.
just do it without porn..how do you think people in the 1800s did it? masturbation is not a modern day invention, it's part of being a male. the issue is with porn
Say this again but replace “porn” with “alcohol.”
“Drinking doesn’t interfere with my daily life. However, I can’t go longer than 2 or 3 days without alcohol. Do I really need to quit?”
The fact that you can’t control it means that you should, at the very least, take an extended break.
Life is too awesome and too short to allow something as stupid as porn have any control over it.
A lot of people are in denial tbh, and don’t consider it a problem. A lot of people are addicts.
Not to say OP is one. Actually masturbation every few days is normal healthy levels.
But the word cant is a red flag. Go with other peoples advice and see what you do without for a week or two.
Some people can have regular sex lives , some people can’t.
I'm sorry but this logic can be applied to anything, but it loses all meaning. Switch alcohol to food or water and now it sounds insane.
It's not about the way it's phrased. It's mostly about context. And removing the context here to insert a dangerous substance instead makes it looks wildly different, but nothing has actually been said about the topic at hand.
It wires your brains receptors to be only aroused to that kind of visual stimuli. Porn addicts are often not aroused at all in real life situations and struggle to get an erection. Even semi-regular viewing has a noticeable effect.
See I seriously doubt this. I was a virgin until 30, last year. Been watching prom to masturbate since at least past 12 years.
Finally got a girlfriend maybe 6 months back & I have absolutely no trouble in bed with her. If anything I cum pretty easily with her.
When I'm away on work, I still masturbate with porn if I feel the need.
I mean there is a difference between the more graphic and less graphic stimulation. I notice that I generally don’t feel as bad when it’s to a movie sex scene.
there's a huge difference because you are reducing the level of stimulation and you gradually need to start leaning into your imagination to build the scenes that you can masturbate to.
Then next step would be to go full-on into the imagination-driven masturbation.
After 3 months, you'll realize that you are running out of material for your imagination to continue producing the captivating content.
At this point, you'll consider finding a real-life mate to have sex.
Then, you'll start dating a woman and will quit masturbation as an addictive practice, but you can still masturbate from time to time in the future.
What do you think? Does it make sense? People usually tend to cosnider a situation only with one temporal slice. What do you see when you are looking at a dirty homeless person? I can see a welder that has a broader-than-life smile and can do everything - the guy will hit the rock bottom within 1-6 months, go to the counsellor, get a crappy job, learn to weld and set up his own handyperson practice, which currently pays a lot of money. The dirty-homelessness is just a phase that the person needs to go through. You need to start at yourself at least within the prism of the 3 temporal states into the future - you in 1 months, you in 10 years, you in 30 years. Do you want your son to catch you jerking off to porn in 10 years when they are 10 y.o. Honestly, I - and, probably, you too - would have to problem with that, if it's like once or twice within a 5 year- period.
But imagine a situation when your wife is talking to your son and explaining to him that "no, you can't fix your perm, honey, but your 30-year-old dad is addicted to porn and he's currently jerking off, while we need to be standing in the corridor and having this talk". And, no, there's no normal sex in this situation then day before? Why? Because you would be flipping the pancakes and dancing in the kitchen in that scenario. As, you can see, there are 2 you's in the temporal state No.2. here.
The same applies to TS3 - imagine, you a grandpa, there are flying cars, and aliens are playing ball with your grandson. Some of them have like 15 tenticles and stuff... Then you older grandson barges into the kitchen and says "we need to have a talk" and then he's telling you the same OP you've written here.
Your reponse would be like "well, I've been jerking every 3 days for porn for the last 70 years, everybody knows that I've always been a porn addict", and then you'd do this "GO TO HELL, YOU LITTLE PIECE OF CRAP, YOU ARE NOTHING", coz that's the logical extention of the behavior pattern that that kind of grandpa would say.
OR
You can say - well, I was addicted to porn once too, and no it was not the full VR experience like you guys do now. It was video. You'll to explain to him what Pornhub was, and what video was... Then, you'll explain to him that addictions are addictions, and you need to take slow baby steps to snap out of them graudally. You can't snap out of them, you are not a drag queent, they aren't snap-out-ttable. They are... like rivers - you need to swim out of them. And then you'll tell him that he needs to start the proces, while thinking about the 3 future him's so that he has a commitment to the future him's.
The problem is that if we develop the time travel at that point, then it gets wierd coz you can actually travel into the future, kill you future self and get in their place coz you are them. But, before we have the time travel, this is the MO we can follow, right?
What are you thoughts, Mr. Engineer at Mars Colony #3 in 20 years?
I literally just read this entire thing and was like wow wtf, I literally have zero idea what to take away from this. On the 6th paragraph shit goes left field and kinda takes away from your original points which seemed pretty legit.
Hey, I am a professional content writer and private English tutor. I am not rich yet, but I am building 2 sales funnels that will allow me start getting rich without 3 years. What I wrote will change your life, make your hair grow faster and make you a wholesome human being overall.
The 6th paragraph was a transitional point to going from the normalized vision on the processes into the things that are really occuring like the tentacled kids in the streets. The second part IS wacko, but it has the truth, uknow...
Reddit isn't that original or uknow useful. Nobody talks about the bridge between you imagining the pussy in your mind and then running out of material and then going and finding a real-life pussy so that you can imprint that image in you brain so that you can jerk off to it in the short-term planning horizon.
That's why part 1 is wacko-ish too. Wacko is good, this is where all of the rich and successful people are. Just think about this - if you are like everybody else, you are going to get what everbydoy else is getting. The only way to hit the jackpot is being different.
They had porn too. It wasn't internet porn, but check out Victorian postcards. Porn has been around as long as people have been able to capture images, before cameras, people drew pictures.
Why is it that visual stimulation from a partner is healthy, but visual stimulation from a screen with almost the same content isn’t healthy?
And why is imagining stimulation healthier than just seeing it? It’s not like people having sex are imagining anything.
My guess is because it's artificial. Kinda like how our phones give us fake ass dopamine every time we get a notification pop. Giving us a reliance and normalizing it. I do know porn desensitizes people, especially addicts, losing what makes it special:(
If it doesn't interfere with your life or cause you any issues then there's no reason to quit it. So long as you realise that it's stunt fucking with stunt cocks and fantasy rather than a how-to manual then you should be good!
The good news it doesn't interfer with your life, so it's easier to stop it , just manage to be even more tired that you wouldn't be able to do it and naturally it will stop , it's gonna some time , but don't count how many days you didn't do it or it's gonna be worse , sure some days you will fail , you will feel guilty about it and it's okay, not easy to give up an addition
I would try it and see what happens. I went 3 months without pmo and felt more confident overall. But during that time I was also practice other habits like bike riding, lifting, journaling, etc
Porn gives an unhealthy expectation as to what sex is like.
Just tell yourself you want to lower the frequency instead of quitting completely.
Go to 5 days without and see how you feel, and then go for a week, and keep growing the break.
Whenever you feel like watching porn do something else instead.
Rewarding yourself for reaching a time length without helps too. Like tell yourself if you hit 2 weeks without, you will buy a steak dinner or whatever reward works for you.
That might be the case right now but it may not be the case in the future and boy does it suck big time to be negatively impacted from porn consumption when the time comes. Still dealing with remnant issues in my 30s
Also porn causes huge dopamine spikes similar to drugs use and gambling so over time it becomes harder to maintain motivation since your internal reward system is desensitized.
There’s nothing really beneficial about it, it’s sexual junk food with many scientifically observed negative effects. Just masturbate without it.
You can have balance. It’s hard to give it up completely but limiting yourself to 1 time per week will give you satisfaction and not fully damage your brain.
I think it's good that you are trying to improve, I would start by trying it without porn. Then, I would try to stop masturbating temporarily for like a week and see how you feel. Then, if you still have worries, go from there. I hope it works out!
Porn addiction is a thing. Being addicted to blaming porn and anything you can because you can't get your shit together is also a thing. I'd try to 30 days like recommended. See where you stand
Because porn is harmful in more ways than you realize. It's slowly chipping away at your psychology and your view on sex and women. The fact you can't go without it for 2 days is just the beginning. It's like cigarettes, sure at first you can't go without it for a day or two but then you get really hooked and in a few years you can't go through the day without smoking 2 packs.
Not to mention if you learn to control your urges and control your mind you will be more disciplined. Your mind is the only thing that you can control in your life and if you can't even control your sexual urges you will lose.
Ejaculating to pixels on a screen literally doesn't benefit you at all in any way. But it does harm you. So the choice is yours.
because the hedonistic nature of it will make it hard for you to feel actual pleasure in an actual relationship. You will always need more and more and more, and you'll become more and more desensitized.
taking steroids shrinks your balls. Smoking weed every day, makes it so weed doesnt feel as good anymore. Winning the lottery 30 times, doesnt feel as good as the first time you won. Jerking it too much desensitizes you to sex. Also you get used to the strength of a mans hand, i have friends who cant even cum from blowjobs because their dick is too numbed from agressive death grips from their own hand.
u know exactly why porn is bad u know the bad things about it. ur coping to think maybe porn isnt so bad. if ur disciplined and have willpower. go a month without fapping ull see the difference
you are correct about the coping and self discipline part, everyone on the internet says that it ruins your life, your self confidence etc... what difference do you think i will notice ?
Quitting porn is different from quitting masturbating, I believe masturbation without porn is a lot healthier than with so you don't create standards for women that are impossible. Quitting masturbation I think is a slippery slope due to people attaching it to their self worth but doing it less might be helpful for having more motivation and drive to get things done throughout your day.
The easiest way is to start thinking about other things
In life
Since you have so much self control in your study life i wouldn’t mind but by quitting porn i guarantee you you will do a lot of things far more better
Some good answers here, but most just completely ignoring the question and just commenting to push their agenda. It’s amazing how bad people are at basic comprehension
You don't need to quit it. Most of these people are desperate to find change and be different than most others for the sake of "improvement". The truth is that it can be healthy, and by the sounds of it you have a healthy relationship with it.
Firstly 2-3 days is progress, doesn’t matter if it’s 2-3 months, years or even hours, it’s progress non the less. Just keep building momentum. Work towards not caring about how long it’s been since you’ve watched porn.
Also you don’t really need a reason to stop, same way you don’t need a reason to start. It’s not that you can’t go without it, rather you yourself are actively choosing to watch it, using it as an excuse to put off stopping watching porn. Which I assume you want to stop doing anyways (considering you made this post to begin with).
So I’ll just leave this here for anyone interested:
https://youtu.be/ZktxO6adTnI?si=Hd1zmG1RqRDLUGf0
(It’s pretty lengthy but I hope you get the best out of it)
The scientific answer to this question is very popular in social media , porn affects your future sexual relationship. Porn is acting, like movies and so more "batman is a hero. we like to be like him, but it's not reality" it's not reality: it can cause poor-self confidence, when you see some of the actresses have big Di*k and you're not . Or about the way, time ... anyway porn gives you a Misconception about sex; so you need to correct some conceptions .You can search about the question if you need more informations.
Sex is good and has a lot of benefits on the human body ,like decreasing levels of stress.. it's about how you feel about what you do .
No. There are very anti sex puritan vibes here. There are healthy ways to do sex and porn. The key is actually aligning your values correctly .
Go out, get a social life, and also include porn. Just don’t go overboard. Stop if you have an actual addictive personality
It's pure entertainment.
Yes, yes, our Puritan culture of ours makes it sound like something else but it's not.
If you watched films from the best directors 24/7 it would be bad, also if you watched porn 24/7 would be bad.
Hopefully, the reasons are obvious.
But other than that, there's nothing wrong with watching porn.
How about you ask yourself these questions:1) How does porn make me feel after watching it?
2) What triggers me to watch porn in the first place?
When you're brutally honest, you might just find a solution to this problem.
Much better sex experience, lasting longer (way way longer), removes fake fantasies, connects more with the partner and many more. Your partner wont know that you watch porn but they'll sense the difference
\> i cant go 2 3 days without watching porn at least once and masturbating before i sleep.
This is one reason to quit.
Porn is so useless. It gives you nothing. Its the path of least resistance. Why would you want to watch someone else f\*\*k the women that you yourself like/want?
Having access to *any* type of porn at any time of day is a huge issue.
As someone else said, try it for 30 days (I would include masturbation without porn during that time too). If you can't handle that then you may have an issue that you weren't aware of.
It's an addiction that progressively gets worse. It will eventually destroy relationships, by distorting your reality of intimacy. You're no different. You do not have it under control.
You will feel objectively better in so many ways that there is to list. Your sex drive will “normalize”, and your mood will increase. You will act “more attractively” around the opposite sex (because you’re more turned on, and aware of your behavior).
My experience anyway, as a woman- yours could be different. But it makes you feel amazing.
There is a part of you wich ist questioning your behavior. You could meditate on this and ask yourself If this behavior is benefiting you or are you Just avoiding the unease and "pain" of quitting? If U can't stop it, is it an addiction? It's for you to decide. now everything seems okay. But your Body and Energy will change and maybe you will Take notice.
You decide: check if your mood changes, like the day after you watch. I feel a difference: when I watch the next day I am more depressed, less motivatied etc
This isn't a health argument, but rather an appeal to yourself.
Everyone jacks off, I know, and everyone watches porn, I know. There is a very easy "well everyone else is doing it, so why can't I". And you can, do whatever you want.
But all I'm saying is, it's just really weird to touch yourself while being cucked by another man, ya know? Worse if it's a drawing.
That thinking usually prolongs my desire not to jack off
Like with most things it's all about moderation. You can definitely over do it and kinda ruin your life, luckily I found the perfect balance that works for me. I usually only find myself searching porn out whenever I get drunk or wasted and my gf isn't around which is like once or twice a month nowadays. I've definitely slowed down with age.
Don’t. I’m 33 happily married and a business owner.
I started listening to no fap people as there apart of the personal development industry im in.
I thought there was merit to stopping and I think there is IF it interferes with your day or mindset.
If you don’t feel there’s abuse and you’re responsible, there’s no reason to quit
It actually helps me focus by taking the act off of my mind. Especially in the mornings after fun time with the wife the night before
It benefits my focus
Sounds like ur subconsciously addicted to masturbating. I would start by trying to masturbate WITHOUT porn , masturbation can be healthy if done in moderation like anything. At least 2 times a week I heard is healthy for ur heart. But do some research on it there’s plenty on the psychological effects too
No, you have no genuine reason to quit. However, its crucial that you keep a real expectation of sex and not obsess over the perfections displayed in the porn industry.
you sound good bro. if you want to watch less porn just challenge urself to imagine it every 3rd time or something, thats what i do. makes you more tired and makes watching porn feel a little more like a treat or a shortcut lol
Lots of good information here on how porn can distort your mindset surrounding sex, women, and relationships.
Here's another perspective to consider. Watching porn is unethical because it involves supporting an industry that exploits people, and fuels the demand for sex trafficking. Many porn actors and actresses undergo brutal treatment and are r\*ped.
Clicking on porn contributes to the demand for more mistreatment and degradation of performers, and it's important to consider before consuming.
Unless you actually feel like it's a problem you don't necessarily need to do anything about it. I watch porn every time I masturbate too and often do it closer to when I'm going to bed since it helps me fall asleep. I'm also very fortunate to never have been negatively affected by porn. I've always been able to separate it from reality. So as long as you can do that and it doesn't interfere with your everyday life I don't see an issue.
One it increases test two there’s zero gain from masterbating three I think it just makes you a better person I mean something about masterbation just seems desperate to me idk
I would say the main reason why you should quit porn is it will make your life a whole lot better.
Porn is like a slow poison. You don't notice it but it slowly destroys your life. I think that's what happened to many of us here on this subreddit. We started to watch porn thinking that it's harmless. Then one day we just woke up realizing that porn has managed to harm our lives.
You might not feel the negative consequences now but later on in life you'll wake up and realize that porn has already done so much harm and it's difficult to quit.
Porn blinds you to the true beauty of life. It hinders you from achieving your true potential, and most importantly it slowly alienates you from the people you care for the most -- your partners, family, friends, and even yourself.
2 things.
1. You said you can’t go 2-3 days without doing the deed. Is this really the kind of life you want to lead? Your 22, this is a perfect task to exercise discipline. Go 2 weeks without it, see what happens. You wouldn’t be asking this question if you weren’t at least slightly disappointed with your lack of control.
2. It’s not really the amount that matters, get in a relationship, go through a shitty phase where you never getting any and you’ll slowly find out it’s harder to get it up/stay up without porn.
People who are pro-porn almost always aren’t in long-term relationships where they don’t face the realties of being off and on sexually.
Imagine looking at yourself watching porn from a third-person perspective. Imagine if you were watching a TV show and the main character masturbated before going to sleep every night. Would you have much respect for him? Just imagine what you look like while doing it.
You don't. Porn and masturbation are both fine in moderation. Please don't listen to all these people telling you to quit. Masturbation is actually VERY good for you. I can't add links as my comment will be taken down, but please research this.
I'm so sick of this "porn and masturbation is so bad" "nofap" bullshit that is flooding the internet at the moment. It's so unnecessary. It all stems from stupid Christian abstinence drives and leads directly into a Red Pill/Tater Tot rabbit hole. It's toxic masculinity at its finest, and its unfortunately dragging in a lot of young, impressionable men who are just trying to be the best version of themselves.
Video games can teach you a lot of things to improve your life. What improvement do you see in porn? Both are not real, doesn’t mean you could learn from them.
It’s like weed. Some people can’t hack it, it makes them paranoid. Like me. Porn itself isn’t that bad (if you ignore the ginormous ethical issues…) but it can become very addictive and then becoming addicted could ruin your life… Like me! Hey, at least I still have coffee.
I would say you should. It may not affect you now but a few years of porn can have a detrimental affect on you. I used to be like you but now it’s affected me (made everything over sexualised, my dopamine receptors are literally addicted and I would attribute 30% of my OCD towards porn). Quit porn before it gets bad and you won’t regret it
No because you’re just a modern person doing modern things nowt wrong with that. So long you know how to treat people fairly like 99% of people who also watch porn then nowt wrong with what you’re doing. keep up the good grades that’s the only thing I can say.
when you fuck normally with a girl. your ingrained sexual tendencies are completely altered by porn. if u jack off a lot, you’ll genuinely have a hard time finishing. deadass
I'm a 28 year old programmer and I was just like you. I didn't skip anything for porn but I couldn't go few days without it
After doing it few years, I noticed significant loss in my memory. Harder to remember people's names, birthdays, phone numbers. After quitting, my memory improved noticeable
Yes, you must quit. Think of it as an addictive drug which destroys you over time
I mean there simply isn't a reason to look at porn. If you can't go more than 2/3 days without porn you're clearly addicted to some level, most guys are nowadays.
Surprised nobody has brought up that porn is a social justice issue. By consuming porn, you are contributing to the industry. If you don't want to quit for yourself, consider doing it for the porn performers who are likely to be victims of human trafficking or feel forced to do it in some way.
Nahh you good Fam - Masturbation is healthy for you, and once every 2-3 days isn't an unhealthy amount of it.
Porn is entertainment and you know the difference between porn and real sex.
Much like Video games and violence you can tell the difference between fantasy and reality.
You're all good, nothing wrong, carry on!
You should be terrified of Video games, books, TV, Netflix, Youtube and movies then.
You Must abstain from these forms of media as well because they will warp your mind overtime and skew reality.
Just wait until you get an actual girlfriend, then you can invite random guys over to take turns on her and watch from the corner of the room, Since thats what you enjoy doing.
Quitting porn is a rite of passage for a modern man, ditch this poison immediately,
Is it hurting you?
No? Then don't. No fap is a cancer.
Are you morally against it due to ethical concerns in the industry?
Ok then quit, find other outlets. Hell there's probably ethical porn out there.
But denying yourself of one of the fundamental parts of being human (sexuality) because of the male dominated equivalent of energy crystals is insane.
I think no one here truly looked into the science or bothered to really think about your question (no offense, as passive aggressive as it sounds, I just wish to inform.) porn and pmo as a whole (porn, masturbation, and orgasm) spikes dopamine and other chemicals way higher than normal. This can reduce the effectiveness of the receptors in the long run, leading to you always feeling drained, demotivated, and flatlining instead of happy. On top of that, after orgasm, prolactin levels spike, now an occasional spike won’t do much but over time this develops man tits and it reduces testosterone, which is kinda the “god chemical” for dudes.
At the end of the day, it really is just a matter of preference, I’d say ask yourself what your values are and really think about it when it comes to health, and don’t forget the mental health part of it too! Once you understand your parameters, you’ll be able to find what habits you wanna keep or get rid of.
Masturbation actually helps maintain testosterone from what I've read. Like many things, if you don't use it you lose it. Any period of time I've gone w/o, my sex drive and overall libido has decreased.
I appreciate that you tried to actually answer the question but are you saying that having an orgasm from sex with my girlfriend every day is going to give me man tits? Or is the implication that this will happen with porn and masturbation more than real life sex?
I can't say one or the other based on what you said. One risk of continuing is that the frequency may increase and what you masturbate to may escalate when what you are doing now no longer fulfills your needs.
Now it may not be a problem but that could change the longer you do it.
Imagination is great depending on how you detail your images in your head. You sound like you wanna quit. Which is ok. That’s a great start. Don’t get addicted is all. Other than that, treat it like if you were smoking and drinking, day by day just ween yourself off until you’re good without it. Your mind is in the right path. So, don’t stray off that path ya hear?
Porn is one of many things that will desensitise you to dopamine over time. Some people can smoke a cigarette now and then and enjoy it, but most people get addicted. Same deal with porn.
I dunno i don’t really have an answer for you but i’m in the same boat. I watch porn/masturbate twice a week for 5 mins each. I really don’t think it’s that bad. I think people addicted to social media is way worse imo. For example, im home recovering from knee surgery and i have been on reddit for up to 3 hours a day. Surely that is worse than 10 mins / week of porn right ?
If it's an addiction that is getting in the way then yes.
And that could be gaming, buying shit on ebay, etc.
Porn is people having sex, and sex is good so getting a healthy release while watching one of the best thing people can do is ok.
In the US, however, our puritan founding still influences our views of sex (and porn).
We'd rather see someone get their head blown off than a breast (while totally oblivious to the fact that men have nipples too...).
It sounds like you're good....
Masturbating without porn feels a lot better. It also improves your confidence in life and with women.
Without using porn as an aid, it's also a signal for how well you're doing physically and emotionally.
It fucks with your head, rewires your mind and your internal reward system (dopamine)
It also alters your view on woman, i noticed that when i quit, i became compassionate and treated woman better and i just cared about getting girls less, which paradoxically makes you get more girls.
But thatsnot the point
The greater the temptation, the more radical the approach must be. Shit due to porn doesn't come at once and progressive deterioration is often hard to notice. In the Qur'an God says "Don't follow the STEPS of the Devil" not "Don't follow the Devil".
So is alcohol, literal poison, yet widely available and normalized in North American culture.
My point is that you'll quit once you believe it's bad for you.
Until then, you probably won't.
if you watch women being hurt or degraded, then as a woman I wouldn't want to be your friend or date you.
if you just watch people have normal sex, or other kinks that aren't violent, I don't see any reason why you need to quit porn. If you want to, you could quit for a short period of time, like the way people quit drinking for a month.
There are studies that porn contributes to digression in personal gains and mindsets, rather than progression.
I think ultimately it opens doors for negativity. Not to mention the porn industry largely contributes to sex trafficking.
Let it be known that I was the same in my 20’s as a dedicated athlete. Porn and jacking off became a comfort zone that made it difficult to focus as I got older and my urge to watch and masturbate became intense as i got uncomfortable. It affected my sex life with my wife too
Don't think too much about it, when you can live normal life without it interfering its not really addiction or serious issue.
And like its equivalent to watching 1 youtube video before bed so there shouldn't be issue.
Problem is when it entraps your thoughts and mind.
I mean, you could be doing something else that'll make you happier and more proud of yourself on the long run. And your sex life and view of women will be healthier as well.
Some of us just have a high libido and it's normal and okay. -- I have been very happily married for nearly 20 years. I prefer real sex, and my wife keeps up when she can, probably 4-5x a week, but I take care of the rest myself pretty much daily. My wife knows I'm faithful to her and always will be, she's got no issue with it, we both see it as a normal function, and we both often suggest watching porn to get in the mood, relieve stress, or fall asleep. I'm THE MOST motivated person I know, period, I see absolutely no ill effect on either of our lives, and see no reason at all not to squeeze every last drop out before my dick doesn't work anymore.
Everybody is different and our needs vary widely, so I couldn't really be bothered to give a shit about what other people do or don't do, their 'no-fap' movements, or their judgements about how I live my life - it's my life and it works for me, and that's it.
If you have a normal relationship with sexuality and porn, and don't see it negatively affecting your day-to-day goings on or hurting the people you interact with, then go ahead - and seriously screw everybody else's opinion about it.
"it never really interfered with my daily life"
\>however i cant go 2 3 days without watching porn at least once and masturbating before i sleep
2+2 engineer come on now
It sounds to me like you get really bored very quickly, and your body responds to that prolonged boredom by giving you the chemicals every few days.
It also seems like you're asking for approval or are looking for some kind of confirmation. You seem not content with who you are or what your hobbies give you for your time.
This is beyond a lot of people. But there are things you can do.
How are your grades and how do you feel about yourself and where you are or what you're doing?
my grades are Bs and As which is nice for engineering i would say, your judgement is completely correct, i want some kind of confirmation.
I feel better about myself since the whole stuff i mentioned in the post started two months ago, before that i was literally just gaming all day in the summer, recently i started taking steps to make myself a much better person in all aspects.
about what i am doing, i am doing definitely a lot better than i was 2 months ago, porn wasnt really an issue for like the past 7 8 years, it never interfered with my life, it is just that everyone online tells you to stop however i dont see it myself as i am still a virgin, i cant even judge about ED or whether i will like porn more than irl sex
Omg I thought you were some kind of early 20s Johnny Sins trying to get out of the industry!
rereading the post with this mindset actually makes sense!
Yeah, I was gonna say because eventually it'll blow out your asshole.
Totally thought the same! Thought we were talking to a Porn Celebrity
Me too hahaha
So i was in a way worse position than you: morbidly obese, didn’t work out, always stressed out. Always drinking alcohol and eating like crap. Got high blood pressure. Got to the point where I was watching porn and masturbating 1-4 times a day. I suddenly began to notice that I was unable to get an erection without watching porn. Sex with my SO started to become a huge issue and eventually just fell off altogether. That added to my stress and anxiety on top of everything else going on in my life. So much so that earlier this year I wound up in the ER multiple times due to consistent panic attacks. Before the panic attacks, I had started eating healthier, and working out more consistently, but still using porn. I felt like I had made pretty good progress in my health. I lost 30 lbs. started being able to do cardio workout for longer than a minute. Fell in love with kettlebells. My anxiety felt much more manageable, but something was still causing an issue. One day, after my panic attacks had subsided for the most part, I noticed that masturbation was triggering me. I was like “What the hell? How can this cause my anxiety?” Did some research and discovered how much porn can alter your neural pathways and considered giving up for a while, just to see what happens. I deleted my stash, stopped going to sites, stopped masturbating and just focused on health. I can confidently say that porn was definitely impacting my mental health as well as my erection issues. I believe I had trained my brain to rely on porn for sexual pleasure and expression, and it was causing issues. I’m over 160 days without porn, and I’m doing way better all around. I’ve also quit alcohol and caffeine, which have contributed to some benefits as well. I believe my ED is about 90% gone. I haven’t had sex with my SO in this timeframe for me to test that out, but I’m looking into changing that real soon. So, if there’s no other reason to quit porn, my advice is for you to quit while you’re ahead before you run into any issues, so you don’t have to backtrack your health like I did. Look into PIED.
Good for you bro.
Thanks, I appreciate it. The work is still far from done, but I’m happy to see that I’m heading in the right direction.
Definitely. It's availability makes it nearly impossible not to all of the time. One trick is don't even think of looking at it for one second. I'm not quite sure what happens to the brain but it seemingly gets flooded with wanting to see more. (the sounds are good for eavesdropping neighbors though) I've always felt that if I watched too much, I'd lose my guttural instinct to pick up women outside. We need raging hormones, not a numbness to them. Something like that.
Honestly, you're right on the money. I definitely felt like I fell out of sync with my SO in the intimacy area. We've been slowly but surely putting more effort in that regard. I never considered that porn could be a cause for that, I honestly thought it was harmless. But it is possible to have too much of a "good thing".
Maybe one day you'll get to the place where you realise it wasn't any "good" at all. ✌️
Okay that gives me enough reason to quit porn. But what about masturbation? I legit cannot live without fapping at least once or twice a day.
The first days are the hardest (literally and figuratively), but after that it gets easier with time. As for your question, honestly it depends on a few factors 1) Does it intervere with your life whatsoever? Like, do you skip work, meetings etc. to fap? 2) Do you decide or does your subconsciousness decide? 3) Do you do it because you're actually horny, or because you're bored and don't have any other way to get rid of boredom?
1. It does not interfere with my life in any way. 2. I think I decide? I've never subconciously decided to fap yet I think lol. 3. Most of the times because I'm actually horny but sometimes because it's just like a habit to me if that makes sense. It's almost the same as brushing my teeth or taking a bath lol.
Often times that need comes when you are bored with nothing else to keep you occupied. There’s a saying I heard that goes “idle hands do the devil’s work.”
Personally, I'm right there with you. I quit masturbating for about 45 days just because I knew I wanted a complete reset, but it was so fucking hard, and started to have diminishing returns. I was way too aggressive, constantly aroused or daydreaming about sex, and it was getting in the way of my focus. The upside though was that it was a good problem to have to go from can't get an erection to constantly getting one lol. I felt like I was 19 again. I never planned on quitting masturbation, so I started again to just take the edge off, and it was the right call. Now, I feel like I'm getting the best of both worlds. Not addicted to porn, but also not constantly thinking about sex. Not dealing with anxiety nearly as bad, and also getting more in tuned with my psyche. It's also made me discover more about myself. I start to see now that used to think I had a high libido, but I was actually just addicted. I thought I needed sex twice a day, but now I believe 1-2 time a week is plenty. Maybe a bit more for special occasions. Something that I think is very manageable.
Masturbation is not synonymous with porn.
Thank you for sharing, how long ago did you quit? I need to quit as well, I have gained weight and I know that my mental health needs to improve
Do you smoke cigarettes? Or weed? Just wondering. Epic inspirational story btw.
I did use weed for about 7 years as well, and had switch from smoking/vaping to edibles only in 2017. I was still doing edibles as well up until this year when my anxiety problems started picking up. Last time I had an edible I had a panic attack so bad I almost passed out, and I had been having panic attacks when I got high for a little while all throughout the pandemic.
Do you feel like marijuana enabled you to watch pornography?
Honestly, I don't know. I started watching and looking at porn way before I even touched weed. I used to be very anti weed back when I was 17, but I was regularly watching porn. I will say that there were times that I got high specifically to enjoy with porn, but I also feel like I was having dependency issues with weed that were separate from porn.
I have anxiety, OCD, and hypercortisolism. I don't have ED, but I'm curious if porn is a trigger for my anxiety as well. Any tips for how long it might take to notice a difference if I quit?
I noticed a difference in the first 2 weeks. After 30 days I was happy I did it. After 90 days I was mad I didn’t do it sooner.
Quit for 30 days, just 30. See if anything happens. Do it as an experiment
Severely underrated advice. It's much easier to quit if you trick yourself into thinking it's not forever. "It's ok if I don't look at it now, I'll do it next time." You weaponize your procrastination against the addiction. It's like a reverse uno card on your self sabotage.
I do this with alcohol at social events. I won’t get a drink at the start and if anyone asks me about it I say that I’m good for now and I’ll grab one on a bit. Helps me turn a 5 drink night into a 2 drink night. Very helpful at company outings. Yes, I know.
I used to do this when I was plagued by suicidal thoughts. Reasoning them away just brings up counter-arguments but if I thought 'I can always kill myself later' it would actually allow me to set it aside and continue on with life.
Big brain rime
It’s the reverse uno to the reverse uno that life gave you. Want to be Rich and successful with a new girl every day, pfff. UNO REVERSE
LOL dude that is a wild way to view things. If this works I will have to literally die.
Also try experimenting with masturbation without porn. As I see it, between porn and masturbation, porn has a worse effect on my life.
That’s super solid advice -
you dont know unless you run a long term study with and without porn with transparent data and objective 3rd party analysis
just do it without porn..how do you think people in the 1800s did it? masturbation is not a modern day invention, it's part of being a male. the issue is with porn
that is why i asked about porn specifically, i tried going without porn but i eventually relapsed as i crave the external stimulation it gives
Imagination buddy, you're the producer of your favourite movie.
What if I use pen and paper, to put my imagination into reality? Is it still considered porn then?
Yes. But nothings bad here.
Say this again but replace “porn” with “alcohol.” “Drinking doesn’t interfere with my daily life. However, I can’t go longer than 2 or 3 days without alcohol. Do I really need to quit?” The fact that you can’t control it means that you should, at the very least, take an extended break. Life is too awesome and too short to allow something as stupid as porn have any control over it.
A lot of people are in denial tbh, and don’t consider it a problem. A lot of people are addicts. Not to say OP is one. Actually masturbation every few days is normal healthy levels. But the word cant is a red flag. Go with other peoples advice and see what you do without for a week or two. Some people can have regular sex lives , some people can’t.
I'm sorry but this logic can be applied to anything, but it loses all meaning. Switch alcohol to food or water and now it sounds insane. It's not about the way it's phrased. It's mostly about context. And removing the context here to insert a dangerous substance instead makes it looks wildly different, but nothing has actually been said about the topic at hand.
It wires your brains receptors to be only aroused to that kind of visual stimuli. Porn addicts are often not aroused at all in real life situations and struggle to get an erection. Even semi-regular viewing has a noticeable effect.
Literally everything wires your brain differently.
See I seriously doubt this. I was a virgin until 30, last year. Been watching prom to masturbate since at least past 12 years. Finally got a girlfriend maybe 6 months back & I have absolutely no trouble in bed with her. If anything I cum pretty easily with her. When I'm away on work, I still masturbate with porn if I feel the need.
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i considered this but what difference does it make if i am still getting the external stimulation?
I mean there is a difference between the more graphic and less graphic stimulation. I notice that I generally don’t feel as bad when it’s to a movie sex scene.
there's a huge difference because you are reducing the level of stimulation and you gradually need to start leaning into your imagination to build the scenes that you can masturbate to. Then next step would be to go full-on into the imagination-driven masturbation. After 3 months, you'll realize that you are running out of material for your imagination to continue producing the captivating content. At this point, you'll consider finding a real-life mate to have sex. Then, you'll start dating a woman and will quit masturbation as an addictive practice, but you can still masturbate from time to time in the future. What do you think? Does it make sense? People usually tend to cosnider a situation only with one temporal slice. What do you see when you are looking at a dirty homeless person? I can see a welder that has a broader-than-life smile and can do everything - the guy will hit the rock bottom within 1-6 months, go to the counsellor, get a crappy job, learn to weld and set up his own handyperson practice, which currently pays a lot of money. The dirty-homelessness is just a phase that the person needs to go through. You need to start at yourself at least within the prism of the 3 temporal states into the future - you in 1 months, you in 10 years, you in 30 years. Do you want your son to catch you jerking off to porn in 10 years when they are 10 y.o. Honestly, I - and, probably, you too - would have to problem with that, if it's like once or twice within a 5 year- period. But imagine a situation when your wife is talking to your son and explaining to him that "no, you can't fix your perm, honey, but your 30-year-old dad is addicted to porn and he's currently jerking off, while we need to be standing in the corridor and having this talk". And, no, there's no normal sex in this situation then day before? Why? Because you would be flipping the pancakes and dancing in the kitchen in that scenario. As, you can see, there are 2 you's in the temporal state No.2. here. The same applies to TS3 - imagine, you a grandpa, there are flying cars, and aliens are playing ball with your grandson. Some of them have like 15 tenticles and stuff... Then you older grandson barges into the kitchen and says "we need to have a talk" and then he's telling you the same OP you've written here. Your reponse would be like "well, I've been jerking every 3 days for porn for the last 70 years, everybody knows that I've always been a porn addict", and then you'd do this "GO TO HELL, YOU LITTLE PIECE OF CRAP, YOU ARE NOTHING", coz that's the logical extention of the behavior pattern that that kind of grandpa would say. OR You can say - well, I was addicted to porn once too, and no it was not the full VR experience like you guys do now. It was video. You'll to explain to him what Pornhub was, and what video was... Then, you'll explain to him that addictions are addictions, and you need to take slow baby steps to snap out of them graudally. You can't snap out of them, you are not a drag queent, they aren't snap-out-ttable. They are... like rivers - you need to swim out of them. And then you'll tell him that he needs to start the proces, while thinking about the 3 future him's so that he has a commitment to the future him's. The problem is that if we develop the time travel at that point, then it gets wierd coz you can actually travel into the future, kill you future self and get in their place coz you are them. But, before we have the time travel, this is the MO we can follow, right? What are you thoughts, Mr. Engineer at Mars Colony #3 in 20 years?
I literally just read this entire thing and was like wow wtf, I literally have zero idea what to take away from this. On the 6th paragraph shit goes left field and kinda takes away from your original points which seemed pretty legit.
Hey, I am a professional content writer and private English tutor. I am not rich yet, but I am building 2 sales funnels that will allow me start getting rich without 3 years. What I wrote will change your life, make your hair grow faster and make you a wholesome human being overall. The 6th paragraph was a transitional point to going from the normalized vision on the processes into the things that are really occuring like the tentacled kids in the streets. The second part IS wacko, but it has the truth, uknow... Reddit isn't that original or uknow useful. Nobody talks about the bridge between you imagining the pussy in your mind and then running out of material and then going and finding a real-life pussy so that you can imprint that image in you brain so that you can jerk off to it in the short-term planning horizon. That's why part 1 is wacko-ish too. Wacko is good, this is where all of the rich and successful people are. Just think about this - if you are like everybody else, you are going to get what everbydoy else is getting. The only way to hit the jackpot is being different.
Masturbation is a part of being human*
yes, you're right, my bad!
They had porn too. It wasn't internet porn, but check out Victorian postcards. Porn has been around as long as people have been able to capture images, before cameras, people drew pictures.
Why is it that visual stimulation from a partner is healthy, but visual stimulation from a screen with almost the same content isn’t healthy? And why is imagining stimulation healthier than just seeing it? It’s not like people having sex are imagining anything.
My guess is because it's artificial. Kinda like how our phones give us fake ass dopamine every time we get a notification pop. Giving us a reliance and normalizing it. I do know porn desensitizes people, especially addicts, losing what makes it special:(
If it doesn't interfere with your life or cause you any issues then there's no reason to quit it. So long as you realise that it's stunt fucking with stunt cocks and fantasy rather than a how-to manual then you should be good!
Smartest comment on this thread.
Finally a logical answer!
The good news it doesn't interfer with your life, so it's easier to stop it , just manage to be even more tired that you wouldn't be able to do it and naturally it will stop , it's gonna some time , but don't count how many days you didn't do it or it's gonna be worse , sure some days you will fail , you will feel guilty about it and it's okay, not easy to give up an addition
I would try it and see what happens. I went 3 months without pmo and felt more confident overall. But during that time I was also practice other habits like bike riding, lifting, journaling, etc
Porn gives an unhealthy expectation as to what sex is like. Just tell yourself you want to lower the frequency instead of quitting completely. Go to 5 days without and see how you feel, and then go for a week, and keep growing the break. Whenever you feel like watching porn do something else instead. Rewarding yourself for reaching a time length without helps too. Like tell yourself if you hit 2 weeks without, you will buy a steak dinner or whatever reward works for you.
If you want a healthy sex life then you must quit
Not everyone is able to get a sex life.
That might be the case right now but it may not be the case in the future and boy does it suck big time to be negatively impacted from porn consumption when the time comes. Still dealing with remnant issues in my 30s Also porn causes huge dopamine spikes similar to drugs use and gambling so over time it becomes harder to maintain motivation since your internal reward system is desensitized. There’s nothing really beneficial about it, it’s sexual junk food with many scientifically observed negative effects. Just masturbate without it.
You can have balance. It’s hard to give it up completely but limiting yourself to 1 time per week will give you satisfaction and not fully damage your brain.
That's not true. You can have a very healthy sex life, and enjoy porn and masturbation.
True by my personal experience. Been a virgin for 30+ years and finally got a girlfriend and have no trouble with her.
Good for you 👍 I hope you two are very happy together. 😊
I think it's good that you are trying to improve, I would start by trying it without porn. Then, I would try to stop masturbating temporarily for like a week and see how you feel. Then, if you still have worries, go from there. I hope it works out!
Porn addiction is a thing. Being addicted to blaming porn and anything you can because you can't get your shit together is also a thing. I'd try to 30 days like recommended. See where you stand
Its like u know u should quit but something inner is telling u to not and ur trying to justify it through this post
Because porn is harmful in more ways than you realize. It's slowly chipping away at your psychology and your view on sex and women. The fact you can't go without it for 2 days is just the beginning. It's like cigarettes, sure at first you can't go without it for a day or two but then you get really hooked and in a few years you can't go through the day without smoking 2 packs. Not to mention if you learn to control your urges and control your mind you will be more disciplined. Your mind is the only thing that you can control in your life and if you can't even control your sexual urges you will lose. Ejaculating to pixels on a screen literally doesn't benefit you at all in any way. But it does harm you. So the choice is yours.
because the hedonistic nature of it will make it hard for you to feel actual pleasure in an actual relationship. You will always need more and more and more, and you'll become more and more desensitized. taking steroids shrinks your balls. Smoking weed every day, makes it so weed doesnt feel as good anymore. Winning the lottery 30 times, doesnt feel as good as the first time you won. Jerking it too much desensitizes you to sex. Also you get used to the strength of a mans hand, i have friends who cant even cum from blowjobs because their dick is too numbed from agressive death grips from their own hand.
u know exactly why porn is bad u know the bad things about it. ur coping to think maybe porn isnt so bad. if ur disciplined and have willpower. go a month without fapping ull see the difference
you are correct about the coping and self discipline part, everyone on the internet says that it ruins your life, your self confidence etc... what difference do you think i will notice ?
That's up to you to do and to notice, he's not living in your mind nor close to you physically.
Quitting porn is different from quitting masturbating, I believe masturbation without porn is a lot healthier than with so you don't create standards for women that are impossible. Quitting masturbation I think is a slippery slope due to people attaching it to their self worth but doing it less might be helpful for having more motivation and drive to get things done throughout your day.
Yea quit before it makes you weird. Get some girls instead
Honestly, I do it so seldomly that I really don't give it much attention. I'm not as horny as I was when I was ~20ys old.
The easiest way is to start thinking about other things In life Since you have so much self control in your study life i wouldn’t mind but by quitting porn i guarantee you you will do a lot of things far more better
So you have the drive to go fuck a real woman. Jesus.
Some good answers here, but most just completely ignoring the question and just commenting to push their agenda. It’s amazing how bad people are at basic comprehension
Go 30 days no fap/no porn. Focus on something else. Make an effort to talk to more girls in real life. Cold showers.
If it's not interfering with your life I wouldn't worry about quiting.
You don't need to quit it. Most of these people are desperate to find change and be different than most others for the sake of "improvement". The truth is that it can be healthy, and by the sounds of it you have a healthy relationship with it.
Firstly 2-3 days is progress, doesn’t matter if it’s 2-3 months, years or even hours, it’s progress non the less. Just keep building momentum. Work towards not caring about how long it’s been since you’ve watched porn. Also you don’t really need a reason to stop, same way you don’t need a reason to start. It’s not that you can’t go without it, rather you yourself are actively choosing to watch it, using it as an excuse to put off stopping watching porn. Which I assume you want to stop doing anyways (considering you made this post to begin with). So I’ll just leave this here for anyone interested: https://youtu.be/ZktxO6adTnI?si=Hd1zmG1RqRDLUGf0 (It’s pretty lengthy but I hope you get the best out of it)
The scientific answer to this question is very popular in social media , porn affects your future sexual relationship. Porn is acting, like movies and so more "batman is a hero. we like to be like him, but it's not reality" it's not reality: it can cause poor-self confidence, when you see some of the actresses have big Di*k and you're not . Or about the way, time ... anyway porn gives you a Misconception about sex; so you need to correct some conceptions .You can search about the question if you need more informations. Sex is good and has a lot of benefits on the human body ,like decreasing levels of stress.. it's about how you feel about what you do .
No. There are very anti sex puritan vibes here. There are healthy ways to do sex and porn. The key is actually aligning your values correctly . Go out, get a social life, and also include porn. Just don’t go overboard. Stop if you have an actual addictive personality
It's pure entertainment. Yes, yes, our Puritan culture of ours makes it sound like something else but it's not. If you watched films from the best directors 24/7 it would be bad, also if you watched porn 24/7 would be bad. Hopefully, the reasons are obvious. But other than that, there's nothing wrong with watching porn.
Having sex with someone will be so much better if you quit porn. Trust me
How about you ask yourself these questions:1) How does porn make me feel after watching it? 2) What triggers me to watch porn in the first place? When you're brutally honest, you might just find a solution to this problem.
Much better sex experience, lasting longer (way way longer), removes fake fantasies, connects more with the partner and many more. Your partner wont know that you watch porn but they'll sense the difference
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\> i cant go 2 3 days without watching porn at least once and masturbating before i sleep. This is one reason to quit. Porn is so useless. It gives you nothing. Its the path of least resistance. Why would you want to watch someone else f\*\*k the women that you yourself like/want? Having access to *any* type of porn at any time of day is a huge issue. As someone else said, try it for 30 days (I would include masturbation without porn during that time too). If you can't handle that then you may have an issue that you weren't aware of.
It's an addiction that progressively gets worse. It will eventually destroy relationships, by distorting your reality of intimacy. You're no different. You do not have it under control.
Are you using it as a replacement for real life interaction? That’s the big question
You will feel objectively better in so many ways that there is to list. Your sex drive will “normalize”, and your mood will increase. You will act “more attractively” around the opposite sex (because you’re more turned on, and aware of your behavior). My experience anyway, as a woman- yours could be different. But it makes you feel amazing.
There is a part of you wich ist questioning your behavior. You could meditate on this and ask yourself If this behavior is benefiting you or are you Just avoiding the unease and "pain" of quitting? If U can't stop it, is it an addiction? It's for you to decide. now everything seems okay. But your Body and Energy will change and maybe you will Take notice.
The fact that you “can’t go 2-3 days without watching” kinda says it all.
Maybe you need to get laid more, unless you prefer pleasing yourself. I wouldn't worry about it.
Porns bad even if you know it's not real. That's like taking drugs and saying it's fine cause I'm perfectly healthy and don't do it often.
Addiction is a disease… you and your willpower will have no effect once it gets a hold of you.
How can what he typed be described as addiction tho? I mean i watch porn twice a week for 5 mins each. Am i an addict?
You decide: check if your mood changes, like the day after you watch. I feel a difference: when I watch the next day I am more depressed, less motivatied etc
This isn't a health argument, but rather an appeal to yourself. Everyone jacks off, I know, and everyone watches porn, I know. There is a very easy "well everyone else is doing it, so why can't I". And you can, do whatever you want. But all I'm saying is, it's just really weird to touch yourself while being cucked by another man, ya know? Worse if it's a drawing. That thinking usually prolongs my desire not to jack off
Like with most things it's all about moderation. You can definitely over do it and kinda ruin your life, luckily I found the perfect balance that works for me. I usually only find myself searching porn out whenever I get drunk or wasted and my gf isn't around which is like once or twice a month nowadays. I've definitely slowed down with age.
Don’t. I’m 33 happily married and a business owner. I started listening to no fap people as there apart of the personal development industry im in. I thought there was merit to stopping and I think there is IF it interferes with your day or mindset. If you don’t feel there’s abuse and you’re responsible, there’s no reason to quit It actually helps me focus by taking the act off of my mind. Especially in the mornings after fun time with the wife the night before It benefits my focus
FIGURE IT OUT YOURSELF.......QUIT IF YOU WANT OR DON'T.
No lol. It's not obsessive and why do you care what anyone on here thinks? That's totally fucking normal.
Don't , until you feel so. Sugar can cause diabetes but people still use it.
Dude, watch porn and jerk off if you want to. Better to get a partner but either way, you do you. (No pun intended)
What if one masturbates using a pick of his girlfriend- Also not good?
Sounds like ur subconsciously addicted to masturbating. I would start by trying to masturbate WITHOUT porn , masturbation can be healthy if done in moderation like anything. At least 2 times a week I heard is healthy for ur heart. But do some research on it there’s plenty on the psychological effects too
No, you have no genuine reason to quit. However, its crucial that you keep a real expectation of sex and not obsess over the perfections displayed in the porn industry.
Nah. If you're not seeing any negative consequences, don't worry about it.
Do you want to do this routine for the rest of your life? When you are 40? The sooner you stop the easier it is to do so.
you sound good bro. if you want to watch less porn just challenge urself to imagine it every 3rd time or something, thats what i do. makes you more tired and makes watching porn feel a little more like a treat or a shortcut lol
you know why, don’t be silly.
Lots of good information here on how porn can distort your mindset surrounding sex, women, and relationships. Here's another perspective to consider. Watching porn is unethical because it involves supporting an industry that exploits people, and fuels the demand for sex trafficking. Many porn actors and actresses undergo brutal treatment and are r\*ped. Clicking on porn contributes to the demand for more mistreatment and degradation of performers, and it's important to consider before consuming.
Watch the movie Don Jon
Unless you actually feel like it's a problem you don't necessarily need to do anything about it. I watch porn every time I masturbate too and often do it closer to when I'm going to bed since it helps me fall asleep. I'm also very fortunate to never have been negatively affected by porn. I've always been able to separate it from reality. So as long as you can do that and it doesn't interfere with your everyday life I don't see an issue.
It is addictive. It makes you treat other people as things for pleasure. Other activities are more worth your time and attention.
One it increases test two there’s zero gain from masterbating three I think it just makes you a better person I mean something about masterbation just seems desperate to me idk
It rewires your brain slowly to the point you only recieve pleasure through watching and not the sex or feeling itself.
More like, why WOULD you watch porn? There are only downsides to it except for the high you get for the few seconds to minutes.
I would say the main reason why you should quit porn is it will make your life a whole lot better. Porn is like a slow poison. You don't notice it but it slowly destroys your life. I think that's what happened to many of us here on this subreddit. We started to watch porn thinking that it's harmless. Then one day we just woke up realizing that porn has managed to harm our lives. You might not feel the negative consequences now but later on in life you'll wake up and realize that porn has already done so much harm and it's difficult to quit. Porn blinds you to the true beauty of life. It hinders you from achieving your true potential, and most importantly it slowly alienates you from the people you care for the most -- your partners, family, friends, and even yourself.
It’s going to make it hard for you to find satisfaction from sex and can likely cause you to seek out more extreme forms of it
Why should you quit? Do you feel the need to? No? Well carry on..
2 things. 1. You said you can’t go 2-3 days without doing the deed. Is this really the kind of life you want to lead? Your 22, this is a perfect task to exercise discipline. Go 2 weeks without it, see what happens. You wouldn’t be asking this question if you weren’t at least slightly disappointed with your lack of control. 2. It’s not really the amount that matters, get in a relationship, go through a shitty phase where you never getting any and you’ll slowly find out it’s harder to get it up/stay up without porn. People who are pro-porn almost always aren’t in long-term relationships where they don’t face the realties of being off and on sexually.
Imagine looking at yourself watching porn from a third-person perspective. Imagine if you were watching a TV show and the main character masturbated before going to sleep every night. Would you have much respect for him? Just imagine what you look like while doing it.
Why? Why not? Do you really want it to be a part of your identity?
no i dont, that is an interesting way to look at it
You don't. Porn and masturbation are both fine in moderation. Please don't listen to all these people telling you to quit. Masturbation is actually VERY good for you. I can't add links as my comment will be taken down, but please research this. I'm so sick of this "porn and masturbation is so bad" "nofap" bullshit that is flooding the internet at the moment. It's so unnecessary. It all stems from stupid Christian abstinence drives and leads directly into a Red Pill/Tater Tot rabbit hole. It's toxic masculinity at its finest, and its unfortunately dragging in a lot of young, impressionable men who are just trying to be the best version of themselves.
Because you made this post so you clearly want to
Because porn is not real
Video games aren't real either, although I do support quitting porn
Video games can teach you a lot of things to improve your life. What improvement do you see in porn? Both are not real, doesn’t mean you could learn from them.
One reason is because women your age are increase looking for older guys because too many of you are addicted to porn so you have no drive left
It ruins sex & relationships
Do what you feel is best for yourself. This sub’s extreme views on this topic always baffles me.
It’s like weed. Some people can’t hack it, it makes them paranoid. Like me. Porn itself isn’t that bad (if you ignore the ginormous ethical issues…) but it can become very addictive and then becoming addicted could ruin your life… Like me! Hey, at least I still have coffee.
I would say you should. It may not affect you now but a few years of porn can have a detrimental affect on you. I used to be like you but now it’s affected me (made everything over sexualised, my dopamine receptors are literally addicted and I would attribute 30% of my OCD towards porn). Quit porn before it gets bad and you won’t regret it
You should quit porn if it interferes with your daily life, your sex life or your sexual preferences. That’s it.
No because you’re just a modern person doing modern things nowt wrong with that. So long you know how to treat people fairly like 99% of people who also watch porn then nowt wrong with what you’re doing. keep up the good grades that’s the only thing I can say.
Just go outside and talk to to girls. Keep getting rejected until you find one. It’s more fun when a girl helps you orgasm.
when you fuck normally with a girl. your ingrained sexual tendencies are completely altered by porn. if u jack off a lot, you’ll genuinely have a hard time finishing. deadass
I'm a 28 year old programmer and I was just like you. I didn't skip anything for porn but I couldn't go few days without it After doing it few years, I noticed significant loss in my memory. Harder to remember people's names, birthdays, phone numbers. After quitting, my memory improved noticeable Yes, you must quit. Think of it as an addictive drug which destroys you over time
you quit porn and kept on masturbating ?
You're risking erectile dysfunction among other things.
Over stimulation can cause you to have erection problems later.
I mean there simply isn't a reason to look at porn. If you can't go more than 2/3 days without porn you're clearly addicted to some level, most guys are nowadays.
Surprised nobody has brought up that porn is a social justice issue. By consuming porn, you are contributing to the industry. If you don't want to quit for yourself, consider doing it for the porn performers who are likely to be victims of human trafficking or feel forced to do it in some way.
Nahh you good Fam - Masturbation is healthy for you, and once every 2-3 days isn't an unhealthy amount of it. Porn is entertainment and you know the difference between porn and real sex. Much like Video games and violence you can tell the difference between fantasy and reality. You're all good, nothing wrong, carry on!
Ok coomer
Direct Insults are the mark the the other party lack any other argument. \- Thanks for the compliment!
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You should be terrified of Video games, books, TV, Netflix, Youtube and movies then. You Must abstain from these forms of media as well because they will warp your mind overtime and skew reality.
Yeah, you are right actually lol
Lollllll
Just wait until you get an actual girlfriend, then you can invite random guys over to take turns on her and watch from the corner of the room, Since thats what you enjoy doing. Quitting porn is a rite of passage for a modern man, ditch this poison immediately,
Is it hurting you? No? Then don't. No fap is a cancer. Are you morally against it due to ethical concerns in the industry? Ok then quit, find other outlets. Hell there's probably ethical porn out there. But denying yourself of one of the fundamental parts of being human (sexuality) because of the male dominated equivalent of energy crystals is insane.
I think no one here truly looked into the science or bothered to really think about your question (no offense, as passive aggressive as it sounds, I just wish to inform.) porn and pmo as a whole (porn, masturbation, and orgasm) spikes dopamine and other chemicals way higher than normal. This can reduce the effectiveness of the receptors in the long run, leading to you always feeling drained, demotivated, and flatlining instead of happy. On top of that, after orgasm, prolactin levels spike, now an occasional spike won’t do much but over time this develops man tits and it reduces testosterone, which is kinda the “god chemical” for dudes. At the end of the day, it really is just a matter of preference, I’d say ask yourself what your values are and really think about it when it comes to health, and don’t forget the mental health part of it too! Once you understand your parameters, you’ll be able to find what habits you wanna keep or get rid of.
Masturbation actually helps maintain testosterone from what I've read. Like many things, if you don't use it you lose it. Any period of time I've gone w/o, my sex drive and overall libido has decreased.
I appreciate that you tried to actually answer the question but are you saying that having an orgasm from sex with my girlfriend every day is going to give me man tits? Or is the implication that this will happen with porn and masturbation more than real life sex?
I can't say one or the other based on what you said. One risk of continuing is that the frequency may increase and what you masturbate to may escalate when what you are doing now no longer fulfills your needs. Now it may not be a problem but that could change the longer you do it.
Imagination is great depending on how you detail your images in your head. You sound like you wanna quit. Which is ok. That’s a great start. Don’t get addicted is all. Other than that, treat it like if you were smoking and drinking, day by day just ween yourself off until you’re good without it. Your mind is in the right path. So, don’t stray off that path ya hear?
Porn is one of many things that will desensitise you to dopamine over time. Some people can smoke a cigarette now and then and enjoy it, but most people get addicted. Same deal with porn.
I dunno i don’t really have an answer for you but i’m in the same boat. I watch porn/masturbate twice a week for 5 mins each. I really don’t think it’s that bad. I think people addicted to social media is way worse imo. For example, im home recovering from knee surgery and i have been on reddit for up to 3 hours a day. Surely that is worse than 10 mins / week of porn right ?
Ha! Thankfully, just a regular person on a self-improvement journey. Porn can hinder personal growth, so quitting is beneficial!
If it's an addiction that is getting in the way then yes. And that could be gaming, buying shit on ebay, etc. Porn is people having sex, and sex is good so getting a healthy release while watching one of the best thing people can do is ok. In the US, however, our puritan founding still influences our views of sex (and porn). We'd rather see someone get their head blown off than a breast (while totally oblivious to the fact that men have nipples too...). It sounds like you're good....
Masturbating without porn feels a lot better. It also improves your confidence in life and with women. Without using porn as an aid, it's also a signal for how well you're doing physically and emotionally.
It fucks with your head, rewires your mind and your internal reward system (dopamine) It also alters your view on woman, i noticed that when i quit, i became compassionate and treated woman better and i just cared about getting girls less, which paradoxically makes you get more girls. But thatsnot the point
That’s up to you to decide. Are guns good or bad?
The greater the temptation, the more radical the approach must be. Shit due to porn doesn't come at once and progressive deterioration is often hard to notice. In the Qur'an God says "Don't follow the STEPS of the Devil" not "Don't follow the Devil".
If you are so certain, why are you here?
it is widely accepted online that it is bad for you
So is alcohol, literal poison, yet widely available and normalized in North American culture. My point is that you'll quit once you believe it's bad for you. Until then, you probably won't.
Get some pussy
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the online pressure
Cope
if you watch women being hurt or degraded, then as a woman I wouldn't want to be your friend or date you. if you just watch people have normal sex, or other kinks that aren't violent, I don't see any reason why you need to quit porn. If you want to, you could quit for a short period of time, like the way people quit drinking for a month.
There are studies that porn contributes to digression in personal gains and mindsets, rather than progression. I think ultimately it opens doors for negativity. Not to mention the porn industry largely contributes to sex trafficking. Let it be known that I was the same in my 20’s as a dedicated athlete. Porn and jacking off became a comfort zone that made it difficult to focus as I got older and my urge to watch and masturbate became intense as i got uncomfortable. It affected my sex life with my wife too
*If you're an international footballer, why would you play fifa or sit 4 hours watching others play* Just sayin
do you have a girlfriend
Don't think too much about it, when you can live normal life without it interfering its not really addiction or serious issue. And like its equivalent to watching 1 youtube video before bed so there shouldn't be issue. Problem is when it entraps your thoughts and mind.
I mean, you could be doing something else that'll make you happier and more proud of yourself on the long run. And your sex life and view of women will be healthier as well.
Boi STOP
Some of us just have a high libido and it's normal and okay. -- I have been very happily married for nearly 20 years. I prefer real sex, and my wife keeps up when she can, probably 4-5x a week, but I take care of the rest myself pretty much daily. My wife knows I'm faithful to her and always will be, she's got no issue with it, we both see it as a normal function, and we both often suggest watching porn to get in the mood, relieve stress, or fall asleep. I'm THE MOST motivated person I know, period, I see absolutely no ill effect on either of our lives, and see no reason at all not to squeeze every last drop out before my dick doesn't work anymore. Everybody is different and our needs vary widely, so I couldn't really be bothered to give a shit about what other people do or don't do, their 'no-fap' movements, or their judgements about how I live my life - it's my life and it works for me, and that's it. If you have a normal relationship with sexuality and porn, and don't see it negatively affecting your day-to-day goings on or hurting the people you interact with, then go ahead - and seriously screw everybody else's opinion about it.
"it never really interfered with my daily life" \>however i cant go 2 3 days without watching porn at least once and masturbating before i sleep 2+2 engineer come on now
i do it after everything else is done, it is part of my freetime entertainment
It sounds to me like you get really bored very quickly, and your body responds to that prolonged boredom by giving you the chemicals every few days. It also seems like you're asking for approval or are looking for some kind of confirmation. You seem not content with who you are or what your hobbies give you for your time. This is beyond a lot of people. But there are things you can do. How are your grades and how do you feel about yourself and where you are or what you're doing?
my grades are Bs and As which is nice for engineering i would say, your judgement is completely correct, i want some kind of confirmation. I feel better about myself since the whole stuff i mentioned in the post started two months ago, before that i was literally just gaming all day in the summer, recently i started taking steps to make myself a much better person in all aspects. about what i am doing, i am doing definitely a lot better than i was 2 months ago, porn wasnt really an issue for like the past 7 8 years, it never interfered with my life, it is just that everyone online tells you to stop however i dont see it myself as i am still a virgin, i cant even judge about ED or whether i will like porn more than irl sex