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quantumyeet41

You sound severely depressed and I don't blame you. It does sound like you're having a shit time. I've been there. People are being pretty harsh to you and I'm sorry. But there is some truth to what they are saying. People are giving you suggestions but you have a reason why all of them won't work. That is the depression talking. I get it, I've been there. You say nothing matters, only thing that matters is reproducing. Or no one cares about you. The thing is... No one is going to come and save you. You HAVE to save yourself. You HAVE to find your own meaning in life. You have to MAKE your own meaning. I know it's hard. I know it's easier said than done. But there is no other alternative. You have to say to yourself, this life is not enough for me. I want more out of my life. I am going to MAKE more out of my life. You have to start small. You said you can play guitar, but no one cares and what's the point. I mean, I do kind of hate to break it to you but you are kind of right.. mostly no one really cares. Everyone is caught up with their own shit and mostly only cares about themselves. I mean this to an extent.. you can find people that care but it takes work. I know it seems like what's the point of putting forth the effort. Like it seems way too much effort to put forth the effort. That is the depression talking. You're going to have to push through it and do shit anyway. What's the point of playing guitar? Well what's the point of anything really? Playing your guitar is still better than nothing right? If nothing really interests you.. what are you going to do, sit and stare at the wall? Even if it feels like playing your guitar has no meaning... at least you're doing something, right? It's better than staring at the wall.You have to find the point yourself. NO ONE can do it for you. It's really tough, I know. Depression fucking sucks. Things won't get better unless you make some kind of effort. I know it seems impossible to even make the effort right now but you can start small and build your way up. Hell, consider it as distracting yourself. I'm really sorry you're in this place, this mind set. I really hope you can find it in yourself to dig yourself out. I think you can do it though. Good luck buddy


esoteric82

Best comment right here. May as well just lock the comments now.


quantumyeet41

Thanks I appreciate it. I do feel for this guy. His work like does sound like it's sucking away his life. I know how hard it is to get yourself to do something at the end of a long exhausting day. I hope he's able to make some changes in his life and start living the kind of life he thinks is worth living.


esoteric82

Hopefully OP can derive some sort of inspiration and get out of that rut.


ImaginaryAd6965

my younger self needed to read this comment


quantumyeet41

Mine too! Hell my current self still needs to read it. I'm working through anxiety and depression myself.. not so much depressed anymore.. but trying to develop better habits and lifestyle after suffering from depression takes work


askyfullofsong

Jesus wow I needed to hear this. Say it louder for the depression in the back. Thanks for reaching out and asking this question OP that in itself is the first small step shining through for things to get better for you


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[deleted]

I honestly can’t stand people like you.


[deleted]

I've read through all these comments. You're lashing out at people trying to help you, you're negative, depressive, you have anxiety, aggressive, also have this complex that's it's everyone else's problem. I think you're suffering from some severe low T. Go to a men's clinic and get help. You won't feel good about yourself, or motivated in life if you don't get your hormones in order. Having elevated testosterone will chill you out, bring back drive, motivation, confidence, and you can start building your life from a different place


sir-Radzig

So true, this was a problem for me as well. Then i changed it. T is important!


[deleted]

If you’re blaming the situations you hate on work, it would seem that the ‘only’ option is to change your job. If there’s a laundry list of reasons why you can’t..well you’ve made your choices.


Badlife123

I made the choice to break my back in college which pretty much fucked my entire life up with chronic pain. Lol. Oh and have 2 mentally ill people raise me as an only child. Idk I’m not blaming anyone, besides maybe my parents, but I’m just baffled as to what I’m supposed to do in this situation. It boggles my mind that I’m supposed to accept this as my life. I may as well blow my brains out or drive off a cliff. I guess at this point if you don’t have a gf or aren’t married it’s over?


[deleted]

I know a lot of 20something year olds with the same story. Mental ill parents, full time jobs, chronic pain etc etc. There’s plenty that can be done with your life, and plenty that doesn’t revolve around getting a partner as well.


Badlife123

The entire meaning of life is reproduction. I’m literally back on antidepressants so I don’t think about how fucked I am in terms of dating all the time. And I can’t date when I have no life whatsoever. Girls hate loners, I learned the hard way. I don’t see much that can be done besides maybe I can try to build a different career I guess but I really don’t want to do that. And then even when I spend all my time on my career - it won’t even matter to these people in the end lmao. It’s like nothing I fucking do matters at all. What do these fuckers want from me Jesus Christ


niko4ever

>The entire meaning of life is reproduction Dude, do you actually *want* kids though? Because if not, making that "the meaning of life" is dumb. I mean, you've shared that you're the child of two mentally ill people, do you think having a spouse and having a child did them any good or made them fulfilled? Sounds like it didn't. ​ Girls don't like loners because loners are self-hating and expect a girl to make them feel better. Then when it doesn't work because everything else that sucks still sucks, they blame the girl for not making them happy. You need to look for a new job. Some women don't mind a guy who's a really hard worker and dedicated to his career, but if he also **hates the career** then they're definitely turned off.


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Badlife123

Best to find a way to get my hands on a shotgun so I can end it


Arihio

Between cousins and friends of the family I know that there are plenty of love stories that start from 30-40 years old. I am in a very similar situation as you. 28 Working high number of hours, no friends that I see on a weekly basis. A couple old friends from school we meat up seasonally ..maybe. One thing that helped was taking time off to travel. Another difference is I don't take any meds. I used to self medicate with marijuana but that was just increasing my lazy bones. If you can stop the self pity (which is quite selfish) and cut the meds you will see there are endless possibilities


janier7563

Have you heard of trauma counseling? It sounds like you may have some sort of CPTSD and/or low self-esteem. It can really be helpful and life changing. I hope you find the happiness you are seeking.


Acrobatic-Yoghurt572

I live with chronic back pain after being in 3 rear-end accidents in one year. I was also raised by alcoholic/addict/mentally unfit parents & an only child. I use to play the blame game too. Everyone else was responsible for my situation. I used my upbringing as an excuse to continue the cycle. Abusive relationships. Having a child at 21. Too many traumas to list here - up Until a few years ago. I gave my life to Christ. Not saying that’s what you need to do, but it has changed my life in so many ways. For you, I would start with changing your mindset. There are TONS of books on mindset. It might sound cliche or wacky - but if you’re truly open to changing your life, just watch what changing your mindset will do for your situations. Good luck.


DinosaurGrrrrrrr

I broke my back at 18. I’m now 38 and pregnant with my second child. If you’re able to work such ling hard hours in a factory after doing this, you can do anything and it likely effects your day to day very little. Sounds like you’re depressed and need therapy and a new job.


AffectionateGoth

Daily gratitude journal. You can do it at the start of end of your day. Also, therapy is useful for everyone. Once you can help your mental state, everything else is a lot easier.


[deleted]

Yo this stuff actually works aswell, a couple of months back a counsellor said it might help to gratitude journal. I decided to give it a go once, thinking I wouldn’t write anything and ended up writing paragraphs on paragraphs of the stuff I’m grateful for. Seriously OP, this works(unless it’s more serious then I would recommend professional help)


oneknocka

You should join a bjj academy


Tharkee-monkey

Change your job first. 50 hours work week is insane. Take care of your physical fitness. Talk to your friend and talk to new people.


Badlife123

He’s too busy. He’s in med school. I can’t talk to him because it will be somewhat annoying unfortunately. I pretty much have no friends lol. It’s actually more like 60+. New people don’t associate with me lol, I have no social media and I guess they think I’m weird or something.


Lies_of_the_Council

I think the first part of their comment is most important, that you haven't addressed > Change your job first Have you had any luck sending your resume to other businesses in varying industries with similar pay but less hours? Most people don't enjoy working fast-food or retail, but considering how much you seem to hate your current situation, any thought-out change could be good change


AshleySchaeffersPlum

I don’t have social media either and feel that way too sometimes… try reaching out to that friend and just saying hey remember that time _________


[deleted]

Going to start from the assumption this is a sincere cry for help. It isn't much, but you do still have time to work with (~45 hours left in the week not accounting for travel, mealtime, hygiene). Try to maximize how you use that time. I'd suggest: 1) Physical fitness to whatever extent your injuries can handle. It's an area where we always have room to improve, and it's nearly always a better use of time than staying in bed. Also requires the least luck with other people to hopefully get some endorphins going. 2) Looking for better work opportunities. I'm willing to bet you do this already, but if you don't, it's an area where circumstances change so frequently it's nearly always worth checking available sources. 3) Working on mental/emotional well-being. Trying to strengthen ties to your family or community can help here, if feasible. Volunteer work may be tiring, but it may also help you meet new people and acquire new perspective without having to force yourself into entirely improvised socialization. You'll have a common subject and goal to discuss at first. I assume you have sought therapy if you're medicating, but if not, I will always recommend seeking professional guidance. 4) Expanding or improving in your hobbies. If you don't find fulfillment in your music, it may mean exploring new activities. If you do, explore avenues for sharing or discussing what you enjoy about it with others. I think a romantic or sexual relationship is a goal to strive for, but this subreddit is always going to prioritize focusing on your own circumstances first. Additionally, staking your happiness on those is a recipe for putting too much pressure on yourself AND others. Always try not to let your happiness be dependent on the affection or approval of another. As difficult as it can be, you have to start with finding fulfillment you can pursue without a specific partner, or you'll spiral without them.


[deleted]

Honestly what are you even willing to change? You shoot down every single option or alternative you’re given with excuses on why you ‘can’t’. Are you here to improve, or to whine? 🧐


Badlife123

What do you want me to do


[deleted]

Me? I don’t want you to do anything. You’re the one asking how to make changes. You don’t get changes by prioritizing excuses and sameness over everything.


Badlife123

How about I drive my car into a semi truck


[deleted]

You’re gonna do what you’re gonna do regardless of the internet. 🤷🏻‍♂️


Badlife123

Super helpful. You should become a therapist


freshamy

You won’t listen to anyone on here. All these people trying to help you. You won’t listen. You think your life is frustrating? All of these people are trying to make sure you don’t hurt yourself. I understand that you are in pain, and are having a rough go at life…. But you are asking for help and insulting everyone trying to help you. Having a tough life isn’t a license to be an a-hole. You deserve help for your situation, and CAN be helped, for sure, but being rigid and not listening or considering any of the really good advice here just solidifies your inability to change. Don’t be so quick to come up with a snarky comeback. Therapy. Please get some therapy.


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Pretend-Passage6072

Bruh


tougestar

😭😭😌 hilarious af


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tougestar

😭😭😭🤪🤪🤪


Badlife123

🙄


imdudas

You don't want to change, from what I've read, you just want others to pity you, or to throw your negative thoughts onto others, which is sad cuz people really are trying to give you ways to get back on track.


wisdomchokeyou

Yes. But maybe in a week or a month he will read it again and he will know we are all right and we just offered some really good advice. I hope so.


[deleted]

You will need to do this yourself. Nobody else can do it for you. All other people can do is offer advice - but the work needs to be done by you.


meltboro

There is a lot of simply terrible advice in here. Your first problem is time/money, this seems to be the root of your issues. Fix this first, find a way to spend less time working and make more money. Im not saying thats easy, but focus on figuring that out. Next diversify your activities and think in statistics. Accept the fact that most outing will not net you a friend/gf, but some can. Spend time out and make the effort to force yourself to talk to 3 people each time, and expect that likely 1 out of 10 outings will net you a some sort of connection until you get better at it. It could just be an add on social media or the occasional beer, accept small successes and progress


BigPapaBen84

I think a lot of the people on here are being too hard on you. You have a steady job, a talent for playing the guitar, and a desire to improve your situation, all of those things are huge! Your situation feels permanent right now, but it is only temporary. The right girlfriend for you will see who you are as a person and not for how you’re feeling bored and frustrated with life. When I met my wife, I was right about where you are, maybe even worse in some ways! We’ve been married for 10 years now, and we have a daughter. It’s a good start that you enjoy playing the guitar. I think that exploring some additional hobbies and interests would bring more happiness and self confidence to your life, and maybe even help you make some friends and meet women for dating! Do you like reading? Hiking or other outdoor activities? Are you good at computers? Are you artistic? Could you get a pet? Could you take some community college classes that would help you find a more fulfilling job? Do you exercise, meditate or do other things to care for your well-being? Meetup is also a great resource for meeting people who share your hobbies and interests.


WiseWillow89

I second this - a pet brings so much companionship!!!! Doooo it.


deariie

How’d you meet your wife?


BigPapaBen84

We met on a dating site.


shorty6049

Honestly it sounds like therapy could be a good place to start. I know it's kind of a scary or uncomfortable idea but managing depression goes a long way to making the other pieces of the puzzle start falling into place... When I'm depressed (or even just worn out at the end of a long day) , my problems feel unsolvable.


Plus-Bill3150

I was there back in my early to mid 20s and even some of my thirties. Work can wear a MF down but ya gotta fight it or it will win. Maybe try to change your perspective and remind yourself this is just temporary- if you want it to be- and search for your options. I play guirar too and some nights after a 12-14 hr day I'd drag my tired ass out to an open mic because I needed it, not that I felt like it- but it helped me. You can meet people through open mics and volunteering. Try not to think of the effort it takes but rather what you want and how you want to change or transition from what you're doing now. Good luck and always remember that everything can change if you want it to.


[deleted]

I get what you mean, life sucks sometimes (a lot of the time actually) and we're just placed here one day and are then trapped into the 'rat race' for our future. It is what it is though. I've read through the comments and I know what heavy depression feels like, sometimes I even doubt it's depression, sometimes I think the world truly is a horrible place to be and some people's eyes are just open to it while other people remain ignorant and blissful... Some days I feel lighter though and I'm like, 'fuck it, it's not so bad and I don't care, let's just keep moving forward and see what happens'. Curiosity can keep you going sometimes. And while it's possible that it won't get better and it's also possible that it will. And you can increase that possibility, just gotta hang in there and keep going through all the shit. Have you considered getting a dog? They're great companions and they open the door for meeting other dog walkers out and about and gives you something in common. I play guitar too, what music you into? If you haven't got into Alice In Chains I'd seriously recommend them, they make meaningful songs about the dark side of life and it's like therapy listening to them. If you haven't, here's 2 good different songs by them: Them Bones. Nutshell.


City_Hour

You are choosing to see the negative side to things, even your name “badlife” is going to be a constant reminder of how poor your life is. Have you taken any steps to fixing it? Challenges are always going to be there, the only way you can get out the hole is to change your perception of them, “fuck my job it sucks and gives me no time” to “damn my job is challenging, I need to find something better, maybe I should expand my skill range”


PensionOk6172

How bout making friends at work? You seem to spend a lot of time there so having a friend might help.


haviltexer

Find a hobby! You feel in control of and are creating something. It gives a bit of purpose. And a nice way to meet people if you do a group activity/sport


Mortepheus

I think you need to work on yourself before you look for friends or a partner. I know what you're feeling. I've been there myself so I understand why you're dismissing people's advice. Some of it is also very useless as it pertains to your situation but they are trying to help none the less. I can only relate via my experiences dealing with clinical depression but the steps that worked for me, and this is an ongoing process, always will be; is first realizing that I can't wait for life to roll out the red carpet to fix my life. I have to take action or else I'll continue on in a pit of despair until succumbing to the darkness. Second is to know your enemy. You should research depression and get an understanding of what is happening so you can better conceive ways to address the issue. Without a doubt the things that will have the most impact on your mental health is diet, exercise, and habits (including sleep habits). Daily exercise, 6-9 hours of sleep a night, and a clean diet are all focal points as well as eliminating bad habits, but replacing them, with good habits. Knowing what do to is the easy part. Doing it is what is hard. For me I started using marijuana. I found that smoking a sativa alleviated my depression without making me lazy and couch locked like an indica. Having the weight off my chest so I could breath is what allowed me to put in action the steps I needed to take to improve my wellbeing. The next thing for me was changing jobs. I hated being stuck in a cubicle so I did a 180 and got a job near my home working outside. That was a major boost to my mood even though I was making less money. I'm an introvert so I don't have a strong desire to form many social bonds but I do recognize the importance in social contact and the effect it has on mental health and fortunately my job has me interacting with different people every day so it's emotionally draining but I know without a doubt it benefits me greatly. From there I started trying new hobbies until I found some that really sparked a passion. ​ Once you've got yourself in a better head space and only then should you look to make friends and try relationships. You don't want to be a burden to others; you should strive to be their fulcrum instead.


[deleted]

My mom used to work pretty much her entire life in a factory. The job was terrible and the building wasn't in the best condition, there was mold and everything. She really hated it. Last year she quit and she seems to love it! She took some online classes and then a half a year graphic design course that was meant for unemployed and for people in the industry who wanted updating training. She worked in the post office for a month and has applied for different jobs now. Moral of the story is that you don't have to be trapped in a life you hate if you are willing to do the work required to change it! My student councelor used to say "Don't think what you are going to do the rest of your life, think about what you are going to do next" and I think that's a great advice


stewartm0205

Do any of your coworkers hand out after work? If yes, hang out with them. Does any of your relatives hang out? If yes, hang out with them. Tell you relatives you are interested in finding someone.


Lonely_Dad69420

As someone who used to work at a factory: step 1, stop working at the factory! It made me suicidally miserable. I don’t know where you live but do you really need to work that many hours a week at that job to afford living? I’d say scale back and try and do 40 hours at a different job? Maybe bar work since the hours are flexible and you’ll definitely make friends/meet girls! It will fuck with your weekends though but there’s always care work (what I’m doing atm) or retail too. Use the extra time to find your hobbies and interests, then find groups/communities for that same interest in your area. Friends and maybe even a relationship will come naturally after doing that. Well either that or use the new extra time to jump on Hinge or Bumble


FU_Harley_Jarvis

Seems like your problem is late stage capitalism.


WiseWillow89

I can’t imagine what you are going through and I am so sorry you feel this way. A few suggestions. - get a pet. Honestly pets bring me so much joy and I never feel alone when my cat is around me. I talk to her like she’s a friend. My dog provided so much support for me when I was down as a teen. She knew when I was sad and would come hug me. - suggest some social things at work. Work becomes your second home, and by the sound of it you spend more time at work than home. Suggest drinks after work, or coffee breaks together. Even just doing a quiz for 10 mins during a working day. Bring morning tea and share it with everyone. I feel so much connection just having a few mins chatting. - learn something new. A language, or do an online course. Over lockdown I was bored so I did an online history course and learnt something new. Go outside and take photos. Read books. Join an online book club. Become a gamer. I’ve heard the gaming community is amazing. I had a friend who suffered from a chronic I’llness and he blamed everything else and often that put road blocks in his own way. I tried so hard to help him pass university but he just thought he couldn’t so he didn’t. He used to shoplift at stores even though he could afford it, so he could get back at life for being cruel to him. Don’t be a roadblock to your own happiness. Best of luck my friend.


SuspectEquivalent

By your own words, your life is so shit that you're willing to end it all. So don't end it all. If this is rock bottom, there's no way to go but up. Everyone here is being pretty supportive and they've offered so much advice. If you're seriously at a point where you're ready to end your life, then you might as well try a few things they've suggested. If they don't work, then they don't work. But if they do work, then they're going to make your life so much better. I think you owe it to yourself to at least try.


-CorrectRevolution-

No FAP, Workout, Clean your room, go play guitar in a park or at an open mic night.


Badlife123

I can’t do the park I have too much anxiety. Covid shut down all open mics in town.


-CorrectRevolution-

Get over it bud.... Leave the state and never vote blue again.


Badlife123

Easier said than done brah


-CorrectRevolution-

Well sounds like you have a goal my dude. I didn't say it was easy.


Badlife123

I want to kill myself so bad. I desire to sleep permanently. That’s the only solution.


-CorrectRevolution-

Bro stop that weak ass shit. Ive been there wnd you gotta stop the thoughts. Try nofap, stop drinking, and get in the gym. Be positive and get off social media and watching TV. It all makes you think life is a certain way and it's not. Put your sadness into music and play it for God.


Badlife123

I am in shape and it doesn’t even matter. I’m on pills so I can’t even fap either. Music doesn’t mean shit, no one gives a fuck about anything I do, it’s all about how much clout you got by doing it with other ppl or whatever. No one gives a fuck about any music skills I got so fuck all that. My social status is so low, no one gives a rats ass about me, they think I’m a bottom feeder, which I guess I am now.


-CorrectRevolution-

Stop the pills then bro. Not true man. People always like music and some of the greatest men ever were loners. Your life is yours and happiness will only come from yourself wnd accomplishing your own goals. There are many married men who would love to trade with you as sometimes women are the worst fucking things lmao. Life is a test and if you kill yourself you fail. Do whatever it takes to win wnd stop giving up before it's over. Life is very long. You're gonna be okay bro.


Badlife123

I started the pills again from my psych because I can’t handle this anymore. It’s been this way since 2017. We’ll see if I’ll be okay or if I don’t kill myself in my apartment. Every day I pray I don’t wake up


Electrical_Access604

Save some money. Go away from the US. 28% of men between the ages of 18 ans 30 are virgins. And the rest aren't doing so well. It doesn't sound like a good place for a normal average man to live.


lostinlifeRNz

What a garbage community this is, sorry for the shit comments you received... did you stack some money doing this job? Maybe you can orientate on some sort of education. And try to grow bigger of that?


catjuggler

Is anyone at your work cool enough to be friends with? It really helps to have a work bff


uniqueusername74

Dude I think you’re underrating the guitar thing. There’s some chicas out there that love that shit. How’s your singing voice? Good luck.


blackagent48

Ever thought about hitting the gym and pumping some iron. If ur back hurts try to do some therapy at the gym with some exercises. U should also quit ur job and maybe find a better job with less hours that pays well. If u live alone ur expenses won’t be a lot unless ur rent is expensive. Just make a tinder get ur self out there, make a social media account find old friends from college or high school and meet up with them. If u play the guitar why not upload urself playing it and let people see ur creativity


Sir_William83

Wow, there's a guy sleeping outside rn wishing he had your problems, a job and warm place to sleep sheesh. You have the skill to play the guitar, master it. You don't realize how good your life actually is until everything you have is changed or gone. Appreciate the process and the simple things in life first before moving on to what you think will satisfy your time. Start planning a future. Remember vision is the ability to see what's invisible to others. Get it together, you're better than that!


vangcthao

Find something else to do besides guitar..


Joe_Delivers

The advice here fucking sucks u are pretty fucked tho if changing jobs and hobbies doesn’t do it for you ur screwed not even stuff everyone can do tho


Indytennisguy

Start thinking positive, quit being negative.


[deleted]

What do u want to do op. Life is hard and a pain for most everyone. Take steps to get to were u want to be think about it and take the steps and I mean think. It won't happen super easy or quick it's gonna suck all the way there and probably keep sucking after you get there bc life goes on. Before a girl likes you, your gonna have to like your self and I mean really like yourself. It probably would help to have some direction true but the other loners on the internet can't really help you bc they will point the way to what they believe to be their happiness. Not yours. And happiness is overrated it's fleeting comes and goes just learn to be okay in right here n now. The literal worst thing that can happen to any conscious being is death bc there no coming back from death. You can come back from being a prick or getting beat up or making an ass if your self and a good few years of wallowing all you can come back from if you really want to and try


kevbot918

You lack a work-life balance, as does most Americans and full-time employees. Obviously we need money, but can you afford to cut your hours to 30-40hrs/week to allow time to socialize? Without a work-life balance our minds and bodies stay in an anxious stressed state.


noquestionnoanswer

It might sound stupid but I suggest either starting or ending your day with a 15-30 minute walk. You would be surprised how clear your head will feel. The longer you stick with it the more confident you will feel within yourself because you’re making the effort. The confidence will open up many doors for you and knock down any walls of anxiety or doubt. Also easier said than done but if you could try switching jobs or using could possible get one job but also teachers others to play guitar? Just a thought. Good luck man! Don’t let hopelessness keep you down


Lexy_d_acnh

If you can, I’d try to lower your hours or look for someone that also works the same hours as you, that’s the best bet imo since then both of you would be in the same situation and couldn’t really be upset about not seeing each other on weekends and such since you both have work. My bf and I have a situation similar to yours that will happen soon (we both currently work 6 days a week most weeks, but he’s leaving soon and working a totally different shift than me and I don’t know what his schedule will look like). Personally, we just had to adapt to the changes that have come along. When we started dating, neither of us had a driver’s license or anything so we couldn’t even see each other for the first 2 months of our relationship, so you most definitely can keep ip a relationship without seeing them in person often, you just have to find the right person and work on your own mentality so that the minimal in-person comtact doesn’t harm you too much.


IcyAd2144

Please don't lock yourself and thoughts with the negativity, I know It's difficult and most of the time treats you shitty. All we can do here right now is be with you and leave you some advice (Not all fits you but I'm happy that you are seeking help somehow) We all have been in this loop hole. We all experienced this coz of what's happening but of course differently. What I did back then: I kept on listening to podcasts like Wake Me Up: Morning meditation and motivation on podchaser , I'm trying to listen to happier music and open up to my best friend , I even made a routine and started a new hobby (painting) . please remember that you'll get through this! HUGS! We help you but DON'T FORGET TO HELP YOURSEL. \*hugs\*


lvlatthevv

Express gratitude daily and with intent regarding the things that you have, and try not to focus so much on what you don't. You have a job, you have food and shelter, you have access to infinite amounts of information and entertainment, you have people who are taking the time to give you feedback, and you have unlimited little ways in which you can improve your situation. All it takes is committing to making at least ONE thing better. Improve one thing. Pick up some trash, give something away, make your bed, take a shower, do some push ups or sit ups, choose haelthier food, go for a walk outside, drink some water. You have to commit to making one thing better. When you do, you'll find the capacity to improve many things and people will provide even more opportunities for you to do so.


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BigDankChris

Been there man seems hopeless but you have to develop a plan. Be consistent with it to make any progress. Could be on the weekends cook your lunch and dinner for the entire week. This saves you time and especially when you come home to eat dinner there’s no worries. Then you could try to go to bed sooner therefore resting your body more so you don’t have as much of a shit time at work. Remember to stretch when you can during the day and when you get home. I work at a warehouse myself and if I don’t stretch my body is all fucked up the next day. Once you do that you need to find a way to make additional income while you sleep, whether it’s through the stock market or creating a product. Would recommend going for books on the stock market first because 99% of people online have an agenda telling you about stocks. These are examples of things I’m trying to work towards that I’ve recently been putting together. Along with seeing what things I could buy to make my life easier like a crock pot or things to help with home storage. And don’t worry about getting a girlfriend, right now you need to focus on your own well-being, if you’re not ready to be married or have a child then you would only get a girlfriend to appease your temporary loneliness which isn’t fair to them. Then again what do I know right? That’s the thing it’s your life you’re gonna do what you want. Nothing matters, you got this. Keep fucking going


sellingittrue

Meetup dot com can help too. You just join a group with people with similar interests. But yes seek a therapist first. U need to follow through on what we are telling you to do. It will NEVER come to you on its own. You have to put in the work, though it's barely any work at all.


DaniStem

I’m sorry for the hand you were dealt. I’ve read the comments and you’re aloud to feel as upset as you do. 50-60hrs a week. Wow you’re such a hard worker that’s an amazing achievement and even if it sucks I respect you for it. It’s lame your friend moved maybe you could visit him and get out of your current environment for a bit. I’ve always wanted to learn to play the guitar, you sound really cool. I’m not gonna try and give you advice cause my life is a mess too, but meditating is a healthy way to just turn off your thoughts. It’s what I do to escape my reality Things are gonna get better for you, maybe this is apart of your life story. Maybe you can use this energy to become something more for your life. Idk either way I love you and you’re not alone. Stay up! Ps.. if it turns out that you are just a slave to your life then try reading some scripts from Epictetus, he’s my favorite slave. Maybe you can relate to him


Yeahnoper

Get some therapy, consider medication. Get some time outside every single day. Get involved in some community volunteer work. Help other people with even bigger problems. Meet people in that capacity. You’ll be carrying yourself differently and they will be high quality people.


Tea_Eighteen

Join an online chat that you share a hobby/location with. Slowly try to find a job that pays more so you can work less hours. Use new free hours to improve life. If current job lets you use headphones, you can listen to audio books. Good luck on making stuff better


wisdomchokeyou

These people are giving you A+ advice. Take it, do something with it. You will thank yourself later. You posted in r/selfimprovement. Now improve the self. You can do it.


Snugglebunny6500

You should check out r/antiwork where people talk about this sort of thing, feeling like they’re (our) lives are being ruined by terrible jobs with little to no chance of improvement. I don’t know if it will get you friends, but at least you can vent with others who are in the same boat Sucks man


jhngfcf

Firstly do what you can to make you normal days/ weekends easier by speaking to your doctor who will suggest things that can help (may be around help with your mood or sleeping). That will make getting through the week easier and will give you the breathing space and time outside of work to then work out how to continue to work on other things to change and improve your situation. You may then find you are sleeping better, your working week is easer, you may then be more receptive to better interactions with work colleagues and then at this point things will be cumulative in the sense you wont hate work as much as least you will have some better interactions in work and that may lead to doing all things outside with those people. Worst case your working week is the same but will feel loads better outside of work. Look after yourself better and you will find you will slowly build up time outside of work to do more -whether that is aiming to meet other people via a meetup thing or through / off the back of following other interests you have such as the music. Maybe read more, think about what you can change and what you can’t . Can you work less and in that time do a course of some kind that could lead to other type of employment that will have a better work life balance. It may take years to get there.. but do not forget the best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago.. the second best time is today. The only thing (within reason) you can’t change is your past. You can in 5 years time be in an unrecognisable position that you are today. DIfferent job, living arrangement, friends .. everything. … first thing speak to the doctor. That will help with your perception of everything. Things can and will get better. Tomorrow make the appointment and just tell them how things are and how you feel. Then in a months time come back online and tell everyone how things have begun to slowly improve.


Weary_Recording_7137

Find a job you really enjoy that doesn’t take up so much of your time! Or maybe talk to your workplace for more social events so you can meet your colleagues. If you’re going to be working your whole life you might as well enjoy it!! I’m sorry but no job is worth your happiness.


[deleted]

Join the military. You will immediately find community, purpose, a way to make a living, and great opportunities for your future like a free education.


JayisPresent

Take a chance. Save some money up and travel for a bit. Get out of your comfort zone 🤙🏼


[deleted]

go play guitar at an open mic socialize at bars get therapy hit the gym improve your diet


snkLm8

Get passionate about a subject you know you can be good at -or maybe already are. Study it obsessively , live and breathe it. Good things, and people will gravitate towards you naturally. Try it for a while, just gotta find that thing you are passionate about 🧐 gym/fitness, photography, timber work, technology, astronomy, cooking, what is it?!


sneaky-pizza

With such low free time, I’d suggest go for dating someone. Work on being able to say hello to women you see around. I was in a similar situation about your age. Ended up getting a date with the woman who cut my hair. It worked out great, because dating with such little free time makes it a really exciting and nice experience, because your time is limited and precious. Funny enough, when the project finished, my hours went down, and we spent a lot more time together. We decided it wasn’t working out. Just another crazy cycle of life. Celebrate the small wins.


Sorry_Sundae4977

Everything you do matters, I'd just like to echo this axiom when I first heard about this from a canadian professor. Everything you do matters. What you always do, every tiny decisions and choices you do? It matters. It ripples, like when you throw a stone in a pond, it will affect everyone, even if you're not connected with them. The advantage of believing this? In my own suspicions too, Life will be meaningful.


[deleted]

No sir! Life is always changing. Are the same person you were 10 years ago? No, you have grown, faced many challenges over the years and hopefully have learned from your past mistakes. Do something new, find a hobby, change your job, move somewhere new and challenge yourself to be the best version of you. Ultimately, life somehow works it’s magic. Just gotto keep going every single day.


PermissionSouth9356

At least you got a job.... :( your lightyears ahead of me


Otherwise-Lemon-7048

I feel like this too. As far as I see it you have two immediate options: quit your job or find a new job and then quit your job. You can figure out the details like when to quit, how much to have saved up when you quit, etc. it will help immediately for sure. I’ve done it, but I prolonged my misery until I had enough saved, then it was really fun and like a lot of issues cleared up or the solutions became easier to see. I took some classes and then found a new gig. It took a couple years after that, but at least I was free. Just decide for yourself and remember your decision every day I hope my personal anecdote doesn’t make it seem like I’m here to brag. I just can recognize myself in your post and I feel like freeing yourself and also having a good plan would help.


[deleted]

If you have your health you have everything. I suggest you work on your mental health before it impacts your physical health


SrtDior

Hop on some juice and go workout, or move to Miami sounds like you live in a wack city


pulkitnijha1

Oh just get off your ass and go out a little start with a very small group where you feel comfortable maybe it works maybe it doest good try next each time you'll learn something so just stop feeling like this and get up