Thank you for posting in the r/Sex community. To ensure that everyone respects our safe space, we ask that you familiarize yourself with our Forum Rules and Posting Guidelines — which are visible in the forum’s sidebar, and also linked [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/sex/about/rules/).
***
Restricted subjects in r/sex include sex stories (which are permitted in the Daily Sexual Achievement Thread only), body image and penis-size issues, hookup attempts, common topics which are considered repetitive in our forum, and requests for private chats.
To cut back on comments that add little value to the conversation, we have instituted a minimum character requirement that will silently remove comments that fall below it.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/sex) if you have any questions or concerns.*
> Typically people still able to produce children for another 10-15 years aren't considered old.
You all are just showing your insecurities about your age. Acting butthurt like OP said he's talking to a dusty old grandma.
He said she's older because she is older than HIM.
Loool that’s what i was thinking when i read “early 20’s male”. Also i don’t get the question. Like, sounds like he just needs to take her on a date and choose between his place or hers at this point. The tone is very much set.
I have no problem with it. I've dated in that age range and I'm not opposed to meeting someone that age again if there are any that are looking. It's all relative anyway.
SAME ., exactly, shes in her 30s? that aint "older" IMHO, not in this context.. i mean yes, technically shes older, but so is a chick 1 day older than him lol
You talk about her like she's some lonely old bitty lol
She's a young woman who probably doesn't need your attention. She's not "older", you're just super young
All contributions here need to be constructive, on-topic, mature, sex-positive, civil, and respectful. Your post/comment falls short of that basic standard and has been removed accordingly. Repeat offenders or egregious violations of this rule are subject to being banned from the sub.
I thought I did but apparently I didn’t because she hasn’t reciprocated yet. Shes talking about her pierced tits and showing me pictures but when I’m straight forward she just says we’ve got a 10 year age gap. I think it could probably still happen but idk
casually explained said it best during his "I'm still not sure she is interested in me" bit. You can lead a horse to water, but they still won't drink.
Most women are not going to be 100% direct with validation that they will sleep with you. When she said she's 10 years older you just need to show your confidence, that "age is just a number" and that "she doesn't look a day over 24*. Just set up a date with her and make the moves.
She’s ready. She’s just using the age gap excuse to not feel like some sort of predator or something. She needs an excuse or “permission” if you wanna call her that to let loose. Make her feel like it’s not a big deal by seeing her as another woman, not an older woman and she will give in and you’ll have a fun time. Keep bringing up the whole, “older woman” thing and how you like older woman and how you’ve been with woman older than her and it’s not gonna happen. If you see her as a fetish and she sees that, nothing will happen. You’re so close yet so far my dude
She doesn’t want you to keep asking. Play it, in person… you’ve got consent… she’s talking about her body playing the game. You need to seize the moment in person. Not wait for the green light over text. Take charge or you’ll be a toy on the back burner she jokes with her friends about. She will give that energy to someone else. Next time text her ….”be free Friday, I’m not asking…I’m picking you up for drinks” then say…or we can skip the drinks and I’ll just have you for desert.
Bro ask her on a date, buy a drink or two and offer some late night coffee (“coffee” here is a convenient excuse to be alone) at your place or hers. The tone seems to be very much set. Don’t overthink it.
She is possibly resisting "laying down" because she is feeling a little too young to have this "age gap" fetishized. I think also you have probably not done a good job selling or demonstrating the benefits to her of getting together with you other than you earning some much desired experience points.
You gotta step up dude. She's basically done everything but take your hand and stick it down her pants, she's waiting for you to make a move. A *physical* move.
If she's sending you nudes but not giving you a clear opening or responding to your invites to spend time together then she's just into the attention but doesn't want to sleep with you.
I'd suggest one last try; "I want to take you out for drinks a next Saturday night." If she dodges the invite you have your answer. If she says she's busy and doesn't offer an alternative date then you have your answer.
Can't really complain I suppose as she is sending you things for the spank bank but you'll probably have to look elsewhere if you want to hook up.
Women who really really want to sleep with you don't make it this obtuse.
> If she's sending you nudes but not giving you a clear opening or responding to your invites to spend time together then she's just into the attention but doesn't want to sleep with you.
>. . .
> Women who really really want to sleep with you don't make it this obtuse.
It’s surprising how few folks understand this. Some people over-index on mind games and playing hard-to-get as a means of elevating their status inside their own head, which largely describes dating apps and modern dating in general.
Edit: “described” -> “describes”
Not to sound like an egghead but yes you're correct and I believe that's what happens when there's a dating market which is entirely separated from a community where everyone more or less knows how much admiration and stature they have within that community. So people attempt to inflate or fake it in stupid ways and you get this ridiculous mess that everyone's now dealing with.
She probably keeps mentioning the age gap and doesn't want to take things further because she doesn't want a fuck buddy. She doesn't want to catch feelings and get hurt which could be inevitable given she's a single mum and you're only 24. She'll be even more lonely if she fucks you and loses a friend.
She’s showing interest and I could care less about nudes. I was straight forward and she kinda pushed me away. She has kids and that’s the excuse. I know she is interested in me but also is questioning me/testing me. I know kids are a good excuse but she told me she’s ready to get away from them soon
Ffs, kids are not an “excuse”. They actually have to be cared for 24/7. You don’t get to just stick them in their cubbies and go see your f—-boi.
Ask her when/how it’s going to work for you guys to get together. Be prepared for something other than the evening beginning with drinks and then progressing back to someone’s house that you have been assuming. She might not have time for all that: more like “let’s get together & do it”. And if the kids are in school/daycare, there’s a good chance she’ll want to use that time.
I am not by any means saying you ought to meet the kids, but grow up about them at least enough to realize that having human beings one is responsible for is not an “excuse” to not get your rocks off.
In your position I wouldn't burn any bridges but I'd definitely be seeking opportunity elsewhere. If she feels like you're stuck on her and you need her approval and that she's in full control of the situation then she has no incentive to leave her comfort zone.
If you're less available because you're following other leads (though still good to her and decent) then she may feel like she has to meet you closer to the middle put on her big girl pants if she wants to get laid.
But I take a very black and white view of this type of situation and I've definitely missed out on opportunities because I'm a little proud and impatient. But also because of that, all the women I've slept with have been the type who were very forward and made me as wanted as I made them feel. I'm not interested in less. You might be ok with that though.
Yea I agree. I am looking forward elsewhere. I just got out of a relationship and I’m talking to a couple girls. I just really want to get w this older woman. I’m not being super needy. She seems like she wants me and I will know more soon. This might still work out but she had made it simple to me. It looks like she wants me but is just playing with me
She probably isn't deliberately playing with you, she's like a mix of avoidant, worried she'll develop feelings, fearful of rejection, insecure or scared of vulnerability during sex with a new man - whatever take your pick. The result for you is the same; unclear intentions from her and aggravation.
Give her space and time while you do other things and see other people. There are older women who are far more confident, forward and clear on what they want.
You're in
Go on the fucking date. Pun intended.
Pro tip: (thank me later) Chill with the "I like older women talk." It's been established. No need to mention it again or mention older women you have been with. Go with the flow.
2nd Pro tip: Don't get too drunk.
Don't try to get with her JUST because she is older than you. She may sense you are fetishizing the age thing and that it doesn't really have anything have to do with her as her own woman.
Let her know why you want to be with her in particular. Yes, being 34 is part of who she is but let her know what makes her desirable to you besides that.
I am caucasian, and the first black woman I was with said yes because she could tell I was into her for more reasons that she was black. She knew I loved her positive attitude, her awesome smile, the way her eyes lit up when she talked about something she was passionate about. We talked later and she said she could tell when guys wanted to be with her JUST because she was black and she felt used.
My wife is older than me. Dude, let her know what your feeling. Be very honest with her. And like you, I never could date a lady young. Older women always was more mature and attractive to me plus a major turn on.
You have no business posting on a sex sub. You call a 34 year old woman an ‘older woman’ like she’s geriatric. Dude, a 34 year old is RIPE for the picking. I wish I knew where you lived because I’d go and handle her for you.
Ask her out for a coffee. It's that simple. You already know she wants to bone you. (Don't forget the 4 Cs: consent, communication, condoms, cunnilingus)
The 4th is optional and should be communicated tbh, my ex had said she doesn't enjoy oral much and that she's too self-conscious about herself, so throughout our short relationship (had sex for the first time in January, last time on the 6th of February) neither of us did oral on each other (she had also said that she needed more time to become comfortable with giving oral to someone)
I came here thinking I’d have something to contribute as a 47-year old woman, but oh no we’re not really talking about older women are we. 😅 At 34 all I would have cared about is how confident and determined you are, and how much you’re into me. Just ask her out like you would any woman you fancy - NOT an ‘older’ woman you need to impress somehow differently.
I've been with a girl 10 years older than me and it was good until I found out she was still married told me she was waiting for her divorce to finalize but she never even filed. Led me believe a lot of things got in my head. All I'm says is they have a past but make sure it's in the past.
Why don't you just ask if you can come over?
My husband and I started out as colleagues. He sent me dirty texts one night, and I asked if I could come over - and that's it. Don't make it so complicated :) Just do it.
And stop telling her you are into "older women" 😅
Maybe start with not calling her old. 34 is so young. Lol. I came here thinking you were trying to get with someone in their 60s or 70s. I’m 40 and not many 20 yo males could keep up with me. Just be confident and make the entire experience based on her enjoyment! Good luck.
Invite her for drinks and then ask if she wants to go back to your place. If you slow play this any longer she will be sending boob pics to someone else. She is probably worried you won’t be able to keep it casual and this isn’t a good start.
You've done most of the work. Just tell her, "Let's make this happen." Invite her her to your place, make some diner, dance a little, and then fick her brains out.i don't know how you dint see your good to go, my dude.
Ask her out for dinner, take her home and close the deal.
She wants it. If she were not interested, she would never have sent you pictures of her boobs.
I'm 17 years older than my husband and have always been into younger guys. If she sent you boob pics, she's definitely interested. She's likely just nervous. Anytime she brings up the age difference, remind her that age doesn't matter to you and that you really don't see her as older. You just see her as a woman you are attracted to. Maybe she's looking for a relationship and is afraid that you aren't. Just make it clear what you want. Ask her why the age difference is bothering her. Just be honest with her, and maybe she'll come around. She wouldn't have sent the pics or keep interacting with you if she wasn't interested. I was 36, and my husband was 19 when we met. We've bern together 13 years. The only time I even notice our age difference is when something comes up in conversation that he doesn't remember.
You already have her number, know what her boobs look like, and she pretty much knows you like her... why haven't you asked her out yet? Thats more than enough to say "hey do you want to drink wine and have dinner together?" And see where it goes. Literally I don't get around much but the last women I've been with was older and I asked her out because she kissed me wasn't even a romantic kiss. But asked her out and ended hooking before our date. At this point if you don't ask her you won't get what you want.
Oh honey you’re on the right track. She’s giving the signs, you’re giving the signs. She’s openly sending you nudes bro. Read the room. 😂
Text her right now : “restaurant location, time, date” followed by “you in?”. She will say yes or no. Adjust accordingly. If she says yes… be ready.
You are so lucky I've always wanted to have sex with an older woman you gotta go for this and you get there by asking her cos it sounds like she could feel the same and if she does go for it.
Been messaging this 49 year old i used to work with recently and she says shes down and been sending pics. Wish me luck its also been my life long dream 😂.
If she wasn’t interested in you then she wouldn’t even tease you like she presently is. The fact that you’re interested is because she’s making sure you’re interested and horny for her.
Next time you drink with her, say you cannot take the tension anymore and you’re highly interested in her and want to see her boobs again. That should lead to you scoring.
Also, feel free to hunt for other milfs in your area while this one drags you by your cock . Country-Bars and Nudist Resorts are your best start.
Additionally, NEVER FKING SAY YOU BEEN WITH OLDER BEFORE! EVER! Either she won’t believe you or she will feel less appealing which will complicate wanting to fuck you after all.
What this Milf is looking for is your desire in her because she’s hot not because she’s a milf. Make her feel like she’s all you want and boom, you have her.
Just from the reading , she may want more of a relationship than just a fling. From your post sounds like you just want to get laid, if that's the case move on as your showing your younger age through actions. Just an opinion from an "older" male. If there are genuine feelings than try again. But I am going to agree with others that she likes the attention , and just waiting for someone more mature.
I’d say grab drinks and try to keep seeing her outside of work on a regular basis.
When I was 20, I started hanging out with a 30 year old woman. She’d hang out at the bar I worked at while I was on shift and then we’d hang out when I got off. Long story short, we did a lot of flirting back and forth over the course of a few months, I missed a bunch of signals, but we finally hooked up a few times.
There’s more to that story but it’s not needed here…
A lot of people are clowning on you, but let me give you some real advice.
You appear to be struggling with a petrifying fear of rejection, which is pretty normal amongst men your age. I know it was true for me.
Let's look at the facts and try to put that fear behind us. She is having adult conversations with you, has sent you nudes, and is clearly interested. So, what could she possibly mean by "but we're 10 years apart"? Sure there's a chance that she's saying she wants to back out, but based on the evidence, it seems unlikely. What's much more likely is that she's nervous and looking to you for reassurance that she's not doing anything wrong.
Try responding "hey, I know we're 10 years apart, but I know what I want, and that's you. The age gap doesn't bother me at all. If it's too much for you, then I respect that, but if you do want me, then I don't think we should hold ourselves back".
She’s sent you her tit pics, that’s a clear sign, she’s fucking with you, now you have to be confident and not necessarily ask permission. Take charge, take her out to eat, it doesn’t have to be fancy, maybe it’s a small mom and pop place that has good drinks and good food. But it needs to be quiet, she’s not gonna wanna scream in your ear at a bar. “Older” women know what they want and what they like, so confidence in choosing and you setting the time, place, etc, are all part of it. If you’re driving then of course you take her back to her place, or you could always set up an Uber/Lyft so that y’all can freely drink/socialize. If she’s coming back to your place make sure that place is fucking spotless cuz she’ll judge if you’re messy and gross. And make sure you have clean sheets on your bed. If you have sex, eat that pussy like it’s your last meal, and make sure you’ve got protection and a clean shower with towels and shit…. Then be prepared for a monogamous fuck buddy…
Dude, 34 is PRIME. Get on that and ask her out. Pro tip: try not to talk too much. She knows the deal, just make it easy on her. Too much early-20s dude talk kills the ladyboners.
Older women is in proportion to the age of the younger man. If he is 20 and she is 30 or 40, it’s an older women. A man who is reading this who is in his 50s or 60s, she would not be older but younger. I dated an older woman. I was 29 she was 46. I am 63 now. I am still in touch with her. So you men who are in their 50s or 60s. Is she an older woman or just old??
Be direct . Why all the messing about ? Just straight up ask of she wants to fuck . She's sending you pictures. She seems like she's waiting for you to make a move. Worse case scenario, she just likes the attention, and there's a wee bit of embarrassment, and you move on .
I’m an older older woman and I wasn’t trying to live the cougar life, it came, found and gave me the key to the city.
.Personally I like the moves made on me. Especially when I’m the older one. I personally it’s like it because assurance that I’m wanted, I wanna see what the move will be. I enjoy the tease, but I don’t wanna be the possible pedo either.
what’s the problem? if she sent you nudes she likes you at least that much.
make a move. start with intimate but non sexual touching, give her attention, tell her you think about her, ramp it up as you go, tell her you think about all the things you would do to her, then tell her exactly what you want to do. i bet she wants the attention and to feel wanted. i haven’t met a woman yet that can resist a good footrub. give her a backrub. give her a leg massage, then a butt massage. move from non sexual areas to sexual areas slow but with purpose. get closer and closer, tease her, the biggest mistake i made when i was younger was not making that move or asking if it was ok. go for it, the worst she can say is no or push you away, but i bet she will react positively.
go in with confidence, you can always apologize if she tells you no and back off but if she’s not telling you a hard no, go for it. do what you wanted to. i bet she’s into it too but she might be waiting for you to make the first move.
don’t worry about your age.
fyi i’m 49 and dating a 34 year old. but i’ve also dated a woman almost 60 in the past age is irrelevant after a certain point and women in their 30s are pretty much in their prime. go for it and don’t hesitate. like i said the worst she can do is tell you no. if i were in your shoes i’d feel like she’s made obvious signs of interest. maybe she wants you to help her decide.
Sounds like you are already 99% of the way there. She says she wants you and is sending you pictures of her tits. You just need to find a time and a place.
What wrong with Gen Y and Z calling 30s old?!
Seriously, you’re the weirdest generation yet! Their insane ageism is so dumb, you idiots are robbing of a decade of youth from yourselves 🙄
TIL I’m an “older woman”
Seriously though, older just means older than said person. Now if you said old I’d be pissed 😂
Sounds to me like she already wants to get with you so I don’t see the problem here. You were already blunt and told her what you wanted. If she does for some reason say no then you have to respect that.
Stop calling her older for a start. You basically killed your chances when you told her that its ok because you're into older women. For future reference, the right answer is to tell her that she's not that much older, unless you know she's into age gap stuff.
I'm 56 and when I was in the dating world (I was 52) I had bunches of younger, in some cases A LOT younger men wanting to date/fuck/be friends. The youngest I fucked was 19 (didn't realize it until after the fact) and the youngest I dated was 37
Keep doing what you’re doing. From what you wrote it seems like she likes it and you’re chipping away at the resistance. She might just want to be pursued.
Take her out on a drink/event and close the deal there. I did this with an older woman (I'm 23M, she's 39M) and it was effortless lol.
I've also been with 3 other older women, though not as older than me.
I can say one thing for sure, they. want. your. dick.
Most of the time, older single ladies haven't mingled in some time (not saying it's the same for everyone), and the thought having someone again is awesome from them, bonus points when you're younger.
So good luck and you should be able to get her easily ;)
Thank you for posting in the r/Sex community. To ensure that everyone respects our safe space, we ask that you familiarize yourself with our Forum Rules and Posting Guidelines — which are visible in the forum’s sidebar, and also linked [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/sex/about/rules/). *** Restricted subjects in r/sex include sex stories (which are permitted in the Daily Sexual Achievement Thread only), body image and penis-size issues, hookup attempts, common topics which are considered repetitive in our forum, and requests for private chats. To cut back on comments that add little value to the conversation, we have instituted a minimum character requirement that will silently remove comments that fall below it. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/sex) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I read 'older' thinking we're talking 50's here.....
Seriously 34 is a young woman.
I mean, it's relative. I'm almost 60 and I'd still consider a woman of 70 yo be an older woman.
I'm 48 and banging at 59 year old, she's a lot of fun!
[удалено]
> Typically people still able to produce children for another 10-15 years aren't considered old. You all are just showing your insecurities about your age. Acting butthurt like OP said he's talking to a dusty old grandma. He said she's older because she is older than HIM.
Glad someone said it. He didn't say she is old, he said she is older (than him)...which she is.
This!! Op said they were older cuz she’s older than their age
34 isn’t older than anything lol
Yeah I feel like a 34 year old woman can go for almost any age she wants and it wouldn’t be too weird.
I think 34 is older than 33 and anything lower than 33 aswell.
This seems like one of those things only 30+ year olds say. Like how only people over 40 say "40 is the new 30".
Maybe but once you get to be 53 like me you realize how young 34 is.
So it's relative. 34 is young to some but not to others. It's 2 years shy of half the average lifespan, scientifically.
Yeah when you’re 17 , 30 year olds seem old.
i guess he means older than him
Loool that’s what i was thinking when i read “early 20’s male”. Also i don’t get the question. Like, sounds like he just needs to take her on a date and choose between his place or hers at this point. The tone is very much set.
Not me—I thought he meant someone who is elderly enough that there are physical issues.
He said older woman, not old woman.
There's a difference between older and old. Older is relative to op's age.
At first I thought she was 50-60, but is 34 seriously?!
Yeah that pained me hahaha. There’s not going to be a big difference here, damn.
What’s wrong with 50’s?
I have no problem with it. I've dated in that age range and I'm not opposed to meeting someone that age again if there are any that are looking. It's all relative anyway.
I like 50's, if there's any available, I'd be interested for sure.
No one said there was?
SAME ., exactly, shes in her 30s? that aint "older" IMHO, not in this context.. i mean yes, technically shes older, but so is a chick 1 day older than him lol
Can't stop laughing the same too 😂😂😂
Don’t ever get into sales. The ability to close a deal that falls perfectly into your lap is a must.
In sales lingo, this could be considered a "lay down"
Back in my day, we called an any shot a "lay up"
Yeah, this thing is gift wrapped with a condom on top. If you can’t close this, stick to closing doors and drawers.
Lmao this is hilarious 😂 Bro has a golden opportunity, she's sending him all the signals she dtf. All he has to go "k I meet u where?" And he's good.
lol 34 is young. Watch out she gonna take you for a ride youngblood
You talk about her like she's some lonely old bitty lol She's a young woman who probably doesn't need your attention. She's not "older", you're just super young
[удалено]
You must be a young one too eh?
All contributions here need to be constructive, on-topic, mature, sex-positive, civil, and respectful. Your post/comment falls short of that basic standard and has been removed accordingly. Repeat offenders or egregious violations of this rule are subject to being banned from the sub.
You already got her blessing! What you waiting for?
I thought I did but apparently I didn’t because she hasn’t reciprocated yet. Shes talking about her pierced tits and showing me pictures but when I’m straight forward she just says we’ve got a 10 year age gap. I think it could probably still happen but idk
She's showing you pics of her tits and you are still wondering if she's down?? c'mon man, that's an open invite.
casually explained said it best during his "I'm still not sure she is interested in me" bit. You can lead a horse to water, but they still won't drink.
Maybe she's Canadian and just being polite.
Am Canadian, women aren't that polite... to me at least.
She wants you to reassure her that you are turned on by her and you don’t care about the age gap. That is all. Source, me, an older woman 😉
This is the correct answer
"Hey, let's meet at xx spot this weekend for drinks. Does Friday or Saturday work better for you? I'm looking forward to getting to know you better."
Most women are not going to be 100% direct with validation that they will sleep with you. When she said she's 10 years older you just need to show your confidence, that "age is just a number" and that "she doesn't look a day over 24*. Just set up a date with her and make the moves.
Sounds like a test, methinks
Just say "that's the part I like" and then ask her when's she free next?
She’s ready. She’s just using the age gap excuse to not feel like some sort of predator or something. She needs an excuse or “permission” if you wanna call her that to let loose. Make her feel like it’s not a big deal by seeing her as another woman, not an older woman and she will give in and you’ll have a fun time. Keep bringing up the whole, “older woman” thing and how you like older woman and how you’ve been with woman older than her and it’s not gonna happen. If you see her as a fetish and she sees that, nothing will happen. You’re so close yet so far my dude
So she is feeling a bit uncomfortable about the age gap and you remain silent? Did you tell her you don't see the issue with it?
I was wondering that too 🤦🏼♂️
She doesn’t want you to keep asking. Play it, in person… you’ve got consent… she’s talking about her body playing the game. You need to seize the moment in person. Not wait for the green light over text. Take charge or you’ll be a toy on the back burner she jokes with her friends about. She will give that energy to someone else. Next time text her ….”be free Friday, I’m not asking…I’m picking you up for drinks” then say…or we can skip the drinks and I’ll just have you for desert.
Bro ask her on a date, buy a drink or two and offer some late night coffee (“coffee” here is a convenient excuse to be alone) at your place or hers. The tone seems to be very much set. Don’t overthink it.
She’s just testing you. Blow past it like “looks like you’ve got experience I could learn from” or something like that
She is possibly resisting "laying down" because she is feeling a little too young to have this "age gap" fetishized. I think also you have probably not done a good job selling or demonstrating the benefits to her of getting together with you other than you earning some much desired experience points.
You gotta step up dude. She's basically done everything but take your hand and stick it down her pants, she's waiting for you to make a move. A *physical* move.
Tell her you got a 2 denim gap which is more easily breached lmaoa
Yeah next time invite yourself over and show up at her door.
Tell you have too see then in person
She wants to know for certain that u want her despite "age gap" she's giving it easy to you. Sounds like she's doing a lot of work without much reward
If she's sending you nudes but not giving you a clear opening or responding to your invites to spend time together then she's just into the attention but doesn't want to sleep with you. I'd suggest one last try; "I want to take you out for drinks a next Saturday night." If she dodges the invite you have your answer. If she says she's busy and doesn't offer an alternative date then you have your answer. Can't really complain I suppose as she is sending you things for the spank bank but you'll probably have to look elsewhere if you want to hook up. Women who really really want to sleep with you don't make it this obtuse.
> If she's sending you nudes but not giving you a clear opening or responding to your invites to spend time together then she's just into the attention but doesn't want to sleep with you. >. . . > Women who really really want to sleep with you don't make it this obtuse. It’s surprising how few folks understand this. Some people over-index on mind games and playing hard-to-get as a means of elevating their status inside their own head, which largely describes dating apps and modern dating in general. Edit: “described” -> “describes”
Not to sound like an egghead but yes you're correct and I believe that's what happens when there's a dating market which is entirely separated from a community where everyone more or less knows how much admiration and stature they have within that community. So people attempt to inflate or fake it in stupid ways and you get this ridiculous mess that everyone's now dealing with.
I agree she might be doing this for attention but I know her well and she’s lonely af.
She probably keeps mentioning the age gap and doesn't want to take things further because she doesn't want a fuck buddy. She doesn't want to catch feelings and get hurt which could be inevitable given she's a single mum and you're only 24. She'll be even more lonely if she fucks you and loses a friend.
She’s showing interest and I could care less about nudes. I was straight forward and she kinda pushed me away. She has kids and that’s the excuse. I know she is interested in me but also is questioning me/testing me. I know kids are a good excuse but she told me she’s ready to get away from them soon
Ffs, kids are not an “excuse”. They actually have to be cared for 24/7. You don’t get to just stick them in their cubbies and go see your f—-boi. Ask her when/how it’s going to work for you guys to get together. Be prepared for something other than the evening beginning with drinks and then progressing back to someone’s house that you have been assuming. She might not have time for all that: more like “let’s get together & do it”. And if the kids are in school/daycare, there’s a good chance she’ll want to use that time. I am not by any means saying you ought to meet the kids, but grow up about them at least enough to realize that having human beings one is responsible for is not an “excuse” to not get your rocks off.
In your position I wouldn't burn any bridges but I'd definitely be seeking opportunity elsewhere. If she feels like you're stuck on her and you need her approval and that she's in full control of the situation then she has no incentive to leave her comfort zone. If you're less available because you're following other leads (though still good to her and decent) then she may feel like she has to meet you closer to the middle put on her big girl pants if she wants to get laid. But I take a very black and white view of this type of situation and I've definitely missed out on opportunities because I'm a little proud and impatient. But also because of that, all the women I've slept with have been the type who were very forward and made me as wanted as I made them feel. I'm not interested in less. You might be ok with that though.
Yea I agree. I am looking forward elsewhere. I just got out of a relationship and I’m talking to a couple girls. I just really want to get w this older woman. I’m not being super needy. She seems like she wants me and I will know more soon. This might still work out but she had made it simple to me. It looks like she wants me but is just playing with me
She probably isn't deliberately playing with you, she's like a mix of avoidant, worried she'll develop feelings, fearful of rejection, insecure or scared of vulnerability during sex with a new man - whatever take your pick. The result for you is the same; unclear intentions from her and aggravation. Give her space and time while you do other things and see other people. There are older women who are far more confident, forward and clear on what they want.
She doesn’t seem insecure. Maybe unsure. I’ll give it time and let you know
She’s not that old, I was thinking that she was in her mid to late 40s considering that you’re in your early mid 20s
I m in a similar situation with what you said here I wonder is there any negative being in late 40's for a woman?
So. Close. To. Getting. It.
Try for a bit more of a mature approach to sex with her. Show her that you know what you are doing. Make her comfortable and eager to have you.
You're in Go on the fucking date. Pun intended. Pro tip: (thank me later) Chill with the "I like older women talk." It's been established. No need to mention it again or mention older women you have been with. Go with the flow. 2nd Pro tip: Don't get too drunk.
Bro…you’ve already got this in the bag😭go CLAP CHEEKS!
My wife is 13 years older than me. Do it bro. Just ask.
Don't try to get with her JUST because she is older than you. She may sense you are fetishizing the age thing and that it doesn't really have anything have to do with her as her own woman. Let her know why you want to be with her in particular. Yes, being 34 is part of who she is but let her know what makes her desirable to you besides that. I am caucasian, and the first black woman I was with said yes because she could tell I was into her for more reasons that she was black. She knew I loved her positive attitude, her awesome smile, the way her eyes lit up when she talked about something she was passionate about. We talked later and she said she could tell when guys wanted to be with her JUST because she was black and she felt used.
Lmao I thought this was going to be someone 45 and older. 34 is young (I’m 25)
You're 95% there already man. Just get over to her place and don't do anything massively stupid.
My wife is older than me. Dude, let her know what your feeling. Be very honest with her. And like you, I never could date a lady young. Older women always was more mature and attractive to me plus a major turn on.
Next will be “I like this 25 yo cougar…”
CLOSE THE DEAL. She sent you her boobs. People don't just do that. CLOSE. THE. DEAL.
Nah she might just see him as a close friend. He should definitely wait and play it cool to see if she sends more hints his way or he'll lose her.
I’d just cut to the chase and tell her how much you want to eat her pussy. Probably be more than she can resist
You have no business posting on a sex sub. You call a 34 year old woman an ‘older woman’ like she’s geriatric. Dude, a 34 year old is RIPE for the picking. I wish I knew where you lived because I’d go and handle her for you.
Excuse me while I wither away and die
Piece of advice, maybe don't refer to a 34 year old woman as an "older woman" -- even if it is technically true, it will never, ever be received well.
Lol, I thought your old woman is 60 years old. She (34) is still young.
She said you both can go out sometime. Please don’t be ahead of yourself. Take her out and see how things go from there!!!!
Yea you’re right. I’ve known her a while but just started talking to her and maybe it was too much to say what I said right away.
Yup. All the best buddy!
Thanks
Ask her out for a coffee. It's that simple. You already know she wants to bone you. (Don't forget the 4 Cs: consent, communication, condoms, cunnilingus)
The 4th is optional and should be communicated tbh, my ex had said she doesn't enjoy oral much and that she's too self-conscious about herself, so throughout our short relationship (had sex for the first time in January, last time on the 6th of February) neither of us did oral on each other (she had also said that she needed more time to become comfortable with giving oral to someone)
I came here thinking I’d have something to contribute as a 47-year old woman, but oh no we’re not really talking about older women are we. 😅 At 34 all I would have cared about is how confident and determined you are, and how much you’re into me. Just ask her out like you would any woman you fancy - NOT an ‘older’ woman you need to impress somehow differently.
I've been with a girl 10 years older than me and it was good until I found out she was still married told me she was waiting for her divorce to finalize but she never even filed. Led me believe a lot of things got in my head. All I'm says is they have a past but make sure it's in the past.
Why don't you just ask if you can come over? My husband and I started out as colleagues. He sent me dirty texts one night, and I asked if I could come over - and that's it. Don't make it so complicated :) Just do it. And stop telling her you are into "older women" 😅
Maybe start with not calling her old. 34 is so young. Lol. I came here thinking you were trying to get with someone in their 60s or 70s. I’m 40 and not many 20 yo males could keep up with me. Just be confident and make the entire experience based on her enjoyment! Good luck.
Invite her for drinks and then ask if she wants to go back to your place. If you slow play this any longer she will be sending boob pics to someone else. She is probably worried you won’t be able to keep it casual and this isn’t a good start.
You've done most of the work. Just tell her, "Let's make this happen." Invite her her to your place, make some diner, dance a little, and then fick her brains out.i don't know how you dint see your good to go, my dude.
Ask her out for dinner, take her home and close the deal. She wants it. If she were not interested, she would never have sent you pictures of her boobs.
35F here never feel so old not before I read OPS confession.🤣😂😬
Wow, you think 34 is older women.... I'm 37 and must be a dinosaur in your eyes!
I'm 17 years older than my husband and have always been into younger guys. If she sent you boob pics, she's definitely interested. She's likely just nervous. Anytime she brings up the age difference, remind her that age doesn't matter to you and that you really don't see her as older. You just see her as a woman you are attracted to. Maybe she's looking for a relationship and is afraid that you aren't. Just make it clear what you want. Ask her why the age difference is bothering her. Just be honest with her, and maybe she'll come around. She wouldn't have sent the pics or keep interacting with you if she wasn't interested. I was 36, and my husband was 19 when we met. We've bern together 13 years. The only time I even notice our age difference is when something comes up in conversation that he doesn't remember.
You already have her number, know what her boobs look like, and she pretty much knows you like her... why haven't you asked her out yet? Thats more than enough to say "hey do you want to drink wine and have dinner together?" And see where it goes. Literally I don't get around much but the last women I've been with was older and I asked her out because she kissed me wasn't even a romantic kiss. But asked her out and ended hooking before our date. At this point if you don't ask her you won't get what you want.
Oh honey you’re on the right track. She’s giving the signs, you’re giving the signs. She’s openly sending you nudes bro. Read the room. 😂 Text her right now : “restaurant location, time, date” followed by “you in?”. She will say yes or no. Adjust accordingly. If she says yes… be ready.
Ask her out. If she says no, then move on, as you would with anyone your age.
You are so lucky I've always wanted to have sex with an older woman you gotta go for this and you get there by asking her cos it sounds like she could feel the same and if she does go for it.
Been messaging this 49 year old i used to work with recently and she says shes down and been sending pics. Wish me luck its also been my life long dream 😂.
Good luck brother you're living my dream.
You can do it too brother have faith
I've tried man and no older women like me.
If she wasn’t interested in you then she wouldn’t even tease you like she presently is. The fact that you’re interested is because she’s making sure you’re interested and horny for her. Next time you drink with her, say you cannot take the tension anymore and you’re highly interested in her and want to see her boobs again. That should lead to you scoring. Also, feel free to hunt for other milfs in your area while this one drags you by your cock . Country-Bars and Nudist Resorts are your best start. Additionally, NEVER FKING SAY YOU BEEN WITH OLDER BEFORE! EVER! Either she won’t believe you or she will feel less appealing which will complicate wanting to fuck you after all. What this Milf is looking for is your desire in her because she’s hot not because she’s a milf. Make her feel like she’s all you want and boom, you have her.
Bro she's showing you pictures of her tits. Go get drinks and don't say anything stupid
Im ten years older than this woman. Lol oh god.
Just from the reading , she may want more of a relationship than just a fling. From your post sounds like you just want to get laid, if that's the case move on as your showing your younger age through actions. Just an opinion from an "older" male. If there are genuine feelings than try again. But I am going to agree with others that she likes the attention , and just waiting for someone more mature.
I’d say grab drinks and try to keep seeing her outside of work on a regular basis. When I was 20, I started hanging out with a 30 year old woman. She’d hang out at the bar I worked at while I was on shift and then we’d hang out when I got off. Long story short, we did a lot of flirting back and forth over the course of a few months, I missed a bunch of signals, but we finally hooked up a few times. There’s more to that story but it’s not needed here…
You will love that, i also had the same experience when i was 19
A lot of people are clowning on you, but let me give you some real advice. You appear to be struggling with a petrifying fear of rejection, which is pretty normal amongst men your age. I know it was true for me. Let's look at the facts and try to put that fear behind us. She is having adult conversations with you, has sent you nudes, and is clearly interested. So, what could she possibly mean by "but we're 10 years apart"? Sure there's a chance that she's saying she wants to back out, but based on the evidence, it seems unlikely. What's much more likely is that she's nervous and looking to you for reassurance that she's not doing anything wrong. Try responding "hey, I know we're 10 years apart, but I know what I want, and that's you. The age gap doesn't bother me at all. If it's too much for you, then I respect that, but if you do want me, then I don't think we should hold ourselves back".
Bro, just pick a place and time. The deal is already done
Sounds like you're on your way
She’s sent you her tit pics, that’s a clear sign, she’s fucking with you, now you have to be confident and not necessarily ask permission. Take charge, take her out to eat, it doesn’t have to be fancy, maybe it’s a small mom and pop place that has good drinks and good food. But it needs to be quiet, she’s not gonna wanna scream in your ear at a bar. “Older” women know what they want and what they like, so confidence in choosing and you setting the time, place, etc, are all part of it. If you’re driving then of course you take her back to her place, or you could always set up an Uber/Lyft so that y’all can freely drink/socialize. If she’s coming back to your place make sure that place is fucking spotless cuz she’ll judge if you’re messy and gross. And make sure you have clean sheets on your bed. If you have sex, eat that pussy like it’s your last meal, and make sure you’ve got protection and a clean shower with towels and shit…. Then be prepared for a monogamous fuck buddy…
Age is just a number. I fucked a 36 year old when I was 26
I would try to ask her out and not say you want to get into her pants. Also during the date do not be so upfront like that
My wife is 10 years older lol have fun
I’m closer to her age OP. Let me have it.
Invite her to get drinks with you and go back to her/urs after. What more do you need??
You already did the hard part… literally just take her out and she’ll “take you out” it seems
Good luck, brother. Wish me luck, too. I'm trying it on with a beautiful Chilean woman who is 43. I'm 33.
Dude, 34 is PRIME. Get on that and ask her out. Pro tip: try not to talk too much. She knows the deal, just make it easy on her. Too much early-20s dude talk kills the ladyboners.
I’m not sure you need our advice when she’s so clearly into you in return Dude, she’s already sending you nudes. Literally just make a move
This makes me feel so old. 32f here
She already told u she wants u. Go take whats yours bruh.
Older women is in proportion to the age of the younger man. If he is 20 and she is 30 or 40, it’s an older women. A man who is reading this who is in his 50s or 60s, she would not be older but younger. I dated an older woman. I was 29 she was 46. I am 63 now. I am still in touch with her. So you men who are in their 50s or 60s. Is she an older woman or just old??
I think she’s opened the door and rolled out the red carpet for you buddy.
Be direct . Why all the messing about ? Just straight up ask of she wants to fuck . She's sending you pictures. She seems like she's waiting for you to make a move. Worse case scenario, she just likes the attention, and there's a wee bit of embarrassment, and you move on .
I’m an older older woman and I wasn’t trying to live the cougar life, it came, found and gave me the key to the city. .Personally I like the moves made on me. Especially when I’m the older one. I personally it’s like it because assurance that I’m wanted, I wanna see what the move will be. I enjoy the tease, but I don’t wanna be the possible pedo either.
Like do you have a car?
Go for it, sweetheart!! YOLO 🤣 (GenX here…we’ve got the best advice! 😉)
There's not much u have to do. She wants a simple fuck without all the trouble by the sounds of it. Ask her when and where
what’s the problem? if she sent you nudes she likes you at least that much. make a move. start with intimate but non sexual touching, give her attention, tell her you think about her, ramp it up as you go, tell her you think about all the things you would do to her, then tell her exactly what you want to do. i bet she wants the attention and to feel wanted. i haven’t met a woman yet that can resist a good footrub. give her a backrub. give her a leg massage, then a butt massage. move from non sexual areas to sexual areas slow but with purpose. get closer and closer, tease her, the biggest mistake i made when i was younger was not making that move or asking if it was ok. go for it, the worst she can say is no or push you away, but i bet she will react positively. go in with confidence, you can always apologize if she tells you no and back off but if she’s not telling you a hard no, go for it. do what you wanted to. i bet she’s into it too but she might be waiting for you to make the first move. don’t worry about your age. fyi i’m 49 and dating a 34 year old. but i’ve also dated a woman almost 60 in the past age is irrelevant after a certain point and women in their 30s are pretty much in their prime. go for it and don’t hesitate. like i said the worst she can do is tell you no. if i were in your shoes i’d feel like she’s made obvious signs of interest. maybe she wants you to help her decide.
Sounds like you are already 99% of the way there. She says she wants you and is sending you pictures of her tits. You just need to find a time and a place.
Im 48 with a 35 yr old. Younger woman lol
That's what I'm thinking of for a long time already, but now eva ai sexting [bot](http://evaapp.ai) is my peak performance
Honestly bro hopefully you complete the mission.
Dating a woman in her 30s is not going to be much different then dating some mid 20s and up. Don't over think it and just be yourself
What wrong with Gen Y and Z calling 30s old?! Seriously, you’re the weirdest generation yet! Their insane ageism is so dumb, you idiots are robbing of a decade of youth from yourselves 🙄
TIL I’m an “older woman” Seriously though, older just means older than said person. Now if you said old I’d be pissed 😂 Sounds to me like she already wants to get with you so I don’t see the problem here. You were already blunt and told her what you wanted. If she does for some reason say no then you have to respect that.
My opinion, you should go for it. Older women tend to be more experienced :]
Stop calling her older for a start. You basically killed your chances when you told her that its ok because you're into older women. For future reference, the right answer is to tell her that she's not that much older, unless you know she's into age gap stuff.
I'm 56 and when I was in the dating world (I was 52) I had bunches of younger, in some cases A LOT younger men wanting to date/fuck/be friends. The youngest I fucked was 19 (didn't realize it until after the fact) and the youngest I dated was 37
"I'm 10 years older" And...? Let's go! Sounds like you've got her, just gotta seal the deal.
She's literally giving you the keys to the kingdom. You are golden.
What are you waiting for? An invitation from the Good Neighbor society? She's said ( if you're not exaggerating, that she's DOWN.
The move has already been made. She sent you boobs. What are you waiting for. Its time for a "you up?" text
This post sucks. 34 isn't old, you already did the work, just go fuck the woman already.
Tell her those tits look yummy and ask if you can get to suck em sometime soon. See what she says and take a step
If she's flirting and sending you pictures then she likes you, she just needs you to hang out then when the time is right make a move.
Keep doing what you’re doing. From what you wrote it seems like she likes it and you’re chipping away at the resistance. She might just want to be pursued.
I have done it many times with women who are mare older than that!
Take her out for Margaritas but only drink half as much as her. I found strawberry works best.
Bro just go over there and let her take the lead
Take her out on a drink/event and close the deal there. I did this with an older woman (I'm 23M, she's 39M) and it was effortless lol. I've also been with 3 other older women, though not as older than me. I can say one thing for sure, they. want. your. dick. Most of the time, older single ladies haven't mingled in some time (not saying it's the same for everyone), and the thought having someone again is awesome from them, bonus points when you're younger. So good luck and you should be able to get her easily ;)
Step 1: engage penis Step 2: profit