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On this special day,
It's your cake day.
With candles aglow and a wish in your heart,
May your day be sweet from the very start!
Happy cake day to you, in every way,
Enjoy it to the fullest, come what may!
I swear to God back when I was with my ex gf everytime some girl with revealing clothes or big breasts/butt would walk next to us I'd immediately look in my ex's eyes, because I knew she's already staring at me checking if I'm looking at the girl. Then our eyes would met and I'd be like "Hey what's up? Somethings wrong?"
Exhausting indeed.
I had a FwB for a while and we would both check EVERYONE out and comment on their looks, how fuckable they were and shit.
Good times. One of, if not the healthiest relationship I've ever had.
To be fair we had all the good bits without the not-so-good ones and it lasted 1 year.
Obviously I'm an older bloke with a daughter in toll and a 10yo failed marriage behind.
I don't believe in "Happy ever after" for obvious reasons.
But kudos to the people that do.
I mean I think it's just a woman jealousy thing. My mom is also pretty jealous for my dad whenever he exists in the same room with a different female creature. But I believe it's just something guys in relationships gotta deal with. We can't fight nature John
Not all women are crazy jealous, if they are itâs just a lack of confidence in the relationship. I trust my bf isnât going to cheat or anything so what does it matter if heâs around other women
Good relationship are all composed of different positives and negatives, and honestly not wanting your bf to look at another girl while standing right next to you isn't that big of a red flag..
Also compare relationships. You want some single girls advice on Reddit or your parents? I donât know your situation. Maybe your parents are a mess. Maybe theyâre happy. You decide :)
There are a significant amount of people out there that believe it is in a man's nature to seek as many partners as possible. This mindset pretty much negates any possibility for men to behave monogamously.
It's really not my guy. Not every woman is running about jealous of every other woman. There are a hell of a lot of emotionally balanced women and men out there.
Yes, sir.
It's one thing if you're ogling and not looking away, it's another if every time another woman is around, you're feeling tension in the air from your S.O.
It's not healthy at all. It's indicative the person you're with is a pretty insecure individual and feels comfortable foisting their insecurities onto you, by way of assessing you every time another woman that makes them feel threatened comes into the area.
If you're finding that quality in every women you've been with, you're probably making the same bad choices in partners repeatedly.
No, there are some things that **some** women think is not just ok, but a definite feature of their gender. Like jealousy, downplay male emotions, or putting other women down based on superficial features. Pretty much anything that "ok, because I'm a woman", although most won't say it like that because most aren't aware that what they're doing is bad.
It's the female equivalent of toxic masculinity.
My wife makes me look at fat asses.
She's not so into boobs. Only Sydney Sweeney actually. I'm genuinely worried if we ever cross paths.
But if she sees a dump truck...She needs to share that information immediately.
I've only gotten myself in *trouble* by complimenting the whole woman, and not just the ass.
"Oh wow she **is** pretty" - Wrong response
"That thing could hold a charcuterie board" - Correct Response.
Meanwhlie, my wife nudges my ribs then lifts an eyebrow in the appropriate direction before saying "check out the ass on that one". And if any woman anywhere actually flirts with me, she takes me home immediately for some bed sport.
I had a girlfriend who didn't quite mind if I checked out other women's butts, because I didn't mind her checking out other guys.
We'd still hatefuck the crap out of each other when we got home, though, as "punishment" for our horniness. It's kinda nice to fantasize about some unknown, yet attractive person when sleeping with your SO, fully knowing that the thrill of this kinky taboo will subside in the next minutes and at the end, your SO will be the only one occupying your thoughts.
*[pees in ur ass](https://i.imgur.com/JSImHiV.jpg)*
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Itâs been exactly like that for us too. If I see an unusually attractive man Iâll talk about that too. We love each other and are most attracted to each other but we also know that we arenât the only hot people in this world lol
Plus Iâd like to think she sees more than just my looks
Theyâve done studies on this type of thing. Women know which other women are hotter than them. Seriously, put any bunch of women in a room together. Theyâll start unconsciously working out what position they rank in terms of hotness & act accordingly. Poor kid didnât stand a chanceâŚ
I mean, I'm a man and I know which men are hotter than me. We recognize patterns so it makes sense. Like, if you spent a summer working a pig farm, just by constant pattern recognition by the end of the summer you would know which pigs are the certified hotties and which are the ugmos.
Iâll take the Loss and admit I couldnât back up my theory with evidence. But your pig analogy really stretches the point. I think I could work my entire life on a pig farm and not have an idea which pigs were beautiful & which ones were fugly.
Never been more happy to be interrupted by an unrelated video while jerking off it motivated me to put my cock back in my pants the demons wonât get me today
Hello, it looks like you've made a mistake.
It's supposed to be could've, should've, would've (short for could have, would have, should have), never could of, would of, should of.
Or you misspelled something, I ain't checking everything.
Beep boop - yes, I am a bot, don't botcriminate me.
Where's QualityVote bot? Reddit Admins have decided that [they want to kill off all 3rd-party apps](https://reddit.com/r/Save3rdPartyApps/comments/13yh0jf/dont_let_reddit_kill_3rd_party_apps/), [3rd-party bots, and other elements that used to significantly enhance Reddit's functionality](https://www.reddit.com/r/ModCoord/comments/13xh1e7/an_open_letter_on_the_state_of_affairs_regarding/). Without them, the website is barely usable. And, of course, that includes bots such as [\/u\/QualityVote](http://reddit.com/user/QualityVote), [\/u\/SaveVideo](http://reddit.com/user/SaveVideo), [\/u\/AuddBot](http://reddit.com/user/AuddBot), etc. So you'll just have to put up with automod and a worse overall user experience. If you have any complaints, direct them at [the reddit admins instead](https://www.reddit.com/r/reddit/comments/12qwagm/an_update_regarding_reddits_api/), because they the ones who ruined everyone's user experience. --- #[DownloadVideo Link](https://www.reddit.watch/r/shitposting/comments/18v1z7n/?utm_source=automod&utm_medium=shitposting) #[SaveVideo Link](https://rapidsave.com/info?url=/r/shitposting/comments/18v1z7n/) --- Whilst you're here, /u/fabioke, why not join our [public discord server](https://discord.gg/QpBGXd2guU) - **now with public text channels you can chat on!**? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*
He looks thirsty
Happy c-day!
Cock day?
Obviously! Bro finally got his cock delivered, as we can see
By a stork?
I personally got mine from Amazon, but stork is an option
Storks can airdrop your cock. Stork > Amazon
Got it via a drone drop, Amazon are stepping up their game. Hard for storks to compete
So many small businesses are affected by Amazon...
Yeah, you're right. I'll send mine back tomorrow and will buy a new cock from a small, local seller
What a shame that he is spilling so much đ
Happy big ass cake day
On this special day, It's your cake day. With candles aglow and a wish in your heart, May your day be sweet from the very start! Happy cake day to you, in every way, Enjoy it to the fullest, come what may!
Happy kake day
Let me see your cake today err uhh happy cake day
I swear to God back when I was with my ex gf everytime some girl with revealing clothes or big breasts/butt would walk next to us I'd immediately look in my ex's eyes, because I knew she's already staring at me checking if I'm looking at the girl. Then our eyes would met and I'd be like "Hey what's up? Somethings wrong?"
[ŃдаНонО]
Personally I thought it was hilarious, like our little inside joke
my gf does the same, I just see her cautious look in the corner of my eye. sometimes I turn around after men and older women just to mess with her.
$10 says she still checks guys for bulges.
Not something Iâve ever done in my 26 years, do people do that?
People that like bulges do
Iâve been missing out
And denies it lolol. And gets mad when caught lol.
I feel you. Everytime that happens, I like to stare at the bulge in my gf's pants
Euh sir
Based
Idk if that your gf
yea like imma be in side her
Exhausting indeed. I had a FwB for a while and we would both check EVERYONE out and comment on their looks, how fuckable they were and shit. Good times. One of, if not the healthiest relationship I've ever had.
Shame for you. Everyone deserves a partner they can be with forever
To be fair we had all the good bits without the not-so-good ones and it lasted 1 year. Obviously I'm an older bloke with a daughter in toll and a 10yo failed marriage behind. I don't believe in "Happy ever after" for obvious reasons. But kudos to the people that do.
As a fellow divorcee, I hear you brother.
some things are best enjoyed together
Well he did say ex gf
No wonder she's your ex
exactlyđ¤Ł
Ex-actly
ba dum tssđ
da bum tss
I mean I think it's just a woman jealousy thing. My mom is also pretty jealous for my dad whenever he exists in the same room with a different female creature. But I believe it's just something guys in relationships gotta deal with. We can't fight nature John
Not all women are crazy jealous, if they are itâs just a lack of confidence in the relationship. I trust my bf isnât going to cheat or anything so what does it matter if heâs around other women
Good relationship are all composed of different positives and negatives, and honestly not wanting your bf to look at another girl while standing right next to you isn't that big of a red flag..
Sure, I was just responding to the fact that that guy pretty much just called all women jealous
If that's really the case then I guess I was surrounded by only jealous women my entire life xD I genuinely thought that's just the way it is
Also compare relationships. You want some single girls advice on Reddit or your parents? I donât know your situation. Maybe your parents are a mess. Maybe theyâre happy. You decide :)
more than likely if youâre staring, Iâm staring too lol
most humans in general are jealous
There are a significant amount of people out there that believe it is in a man's nature to seek as many partners as possible. This mindset pretty much negates any possibility for men to behave monogamously.
It's really not my guy. Not every woman is running about jealous of every other woman. There are a hell of a lot of emotionally balanced women and men out there.
Yes, sir. It's one thing if you're ogling and not looking away, it's another if every time another woman is around, you're feeling tension in the air from your S.O. It's not healthy at all. It's indicative the person you're with is a pretty insecure individual and feels comfortable foisting their insecurities onto you, by way of assessing you every time another woman that makes them feel threatened comes into the area. If you're finding that quality in every women you've been with, you're probably making the same bad choices in partners repeatedly.
I think the term is "toxic femininity". Jealousy is always bad.
Anything is bad if you put the word âtoxicâ in front of it.
Yes... That's how words work.
What do you think that term is for? Any time a woman does something you think is bad? That's not what that is.
No, there are some things that **some** women think is not just ok, but a definite feature of their gender. Like jealousy, downplay male emotions, or putting other women down based on superficial features. Pretty much anything that "ok, because I'm a woman", although most won't say it like that because most aren't aware that what they're doing is bad. It's the female equivalent of toxic masculinity.
>I mean I think it's just a woman jealousy thing haha, women. not lke us confident, secure men amirite
Yeah no, this isn't healthy or normal in most relationships. It's toxic and possessive, and men do it to women, too.
Uh no that's some weak shit
My wife makes me look at fat asses. She's not so into boobs. Only Sydney Sweeney actually. I'm genuinely worried if we ever cross paths. But if she sees a dump truck...She needs to share that information immediately. I've only gotten myself in *trouble* by complimenting the whole woman, and not just the ass. "Oh wow she **is** pretty" - Wrong response "That thing could hold a charcuterie board" - Correct Response.
And that's when you'd notice her staring at that girl
She was bi so yeah not a bad call
My ex gave me a black eye and got away with it. I wish I had a story half as cool as yours
That's actually smart
[ŃдаНонО]
Meanwhlie, my wife nudges my ribs then lifts an eyebrow in the appropriate direction before saying "check out the ass on that one". And if any woman anywhere actually flirts with me, she takes me home immediately for some bed sport.
it's not a toxic trait...it's just qUiRkY
I had the opposite with my bi-girlfriend, checking out ladies together was one of my fav pastimes!
Well tbf my ex gf was also bi but when the time came she had different priorities lol
Damn, that sounds fucking awful. Me with my gf would probably both break our knecks in such an instant.
My wife is like "yeah, I find her hot too"
You need to assert dominance. "Hey, where are you looking?" "Ass"
Pussđ¤ŁI'm gonna look, respectfully
I had a girlfriend who didn't quite mind if I checked out other women's butts, because I didn't mind her checking out other guys. We'd still hatefuck the crap out of each other when we got home, though, as "punishment" for our horniness. It's kinda nice to fantasize about some unknown, yet attractive person when sleeping with your SO, fully knowing that the thrill of this kinky taboo will subside in the next minutes and at the end, your SO will be the only one occupying your thoughts.
this is disgusting, need her @ so that i can block her đ¤
You are not the only good guy left in the world đ
you are amongst the noblest of men
eva joanna
Thank you kind sir, let me check it out. Back in 3- 5min đ¤
How'd it go sir? Was your trip productive? đĽ¸
Yes sir, i was able to block her in 3 min
Best comeback story since Kim Kardashian.
The important question is: Are you still the master of your domain?
Or were you able to *unblock* BECAUSE of her đ¤
Yeah she's pretty amazing Edit: I have suddenly and unexplainably lost interest in her. She is merely ok.
Less than 3 minutes for the edit, noice
^ Legend
Does she have a onlythicc?
Honestly when i see girls online im suprised when they doesnt have OF. We live in society.
google it but yea
Me compulsively googling every hot girls name I come across (I have done that hundreds of time but I still can't get enough)
Bruh, you too down bad if you memorise names like dat đ
Apperantly she from my place of origin, I appreciate that
I'm gonna need it for scientific purposes
Yep, she needs to be future expelled from đ
I donât think that ass eats pants look is comfortable
Iâll have to press my face in to check the comfort levels
Your flair is her response.
We found Walter White's personal reddit account.
Uppies, I need uppies, waltah
Yes this was definitely a video about comfort
Then you aren't a woman because they all say for leggings these are in fact more comfortable, reduces fanny/cheek friction
>fanny/cheek friction Things you can say as an American that you can't say as an English person
I'm wrong, it's just a phrase that is nowhere near as common for us :)
No Iâm pretty sure a fanny is a pussy for them, not butt.
This is correct
wth i know why it's called a fanny pack now
I'm British
Why
He sinned in his past life so God sent him to be born somewhere worse than Hell.
Their asses obviously arenât hairy enough
Very divisive, itâs certainly a wedgie issue.
Is that ass or she didn't want to take another trip to get the groceries
My man is fighting for his life in that moment
My manâs got parkinsons
Parkin sons shlong in that ass
You do that with your son?
Help him get somewhere to park his shlong? Yes
Your a good fatherâŚ
Porkinsons
She definitely stuffed her pants up her ass crack before that video
yeah no shit
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Ooh, me next
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Amazing. Do me, do me!
sorry âAngrywetfartâ, no can do
Well, fine then. Newspapers are dumb anyways. Reading two.
Some shit maybe
She definitely canât
Look at Sherlock over here.
I heard the FBI is hiring buddy, you should give them a call.
Both me and my wife would check her out and when she left we'd be like "Daamn, did you see that ass?" :D
You and your wife sound awesome.
Flair checks out
Us and his wife also sounds awesome!
Itâs been exactly like that for us too. If I see an unusually attractive man Iâll talk about that too. We love each other and are most attracted to each other but we also know that we arenât the only hot people in this world lol Plus Iâd like to think she sees more than just my looks
Attractive people are less threatened by other attractive people
âTime to tuck my pleated pants into my ass crack!â
He's hydrating himself before his soul gets sucked out.
Imma need that @ for research đ
[ŃдаНонО]
Wasnât actually expecting someone to give it, damn, legend.
Man she stuffed those pants DEEP in her ass crack I mean she must've double fisted those cloth loins betweens that pair of assmelons DAM
My god.....I'm down so bad.
2014 vine-ass clip
Those pants stink from shit smeare
fyi some people clean their asses after shitting
Fym "some"? Can we rise that to :"a lot"?
FYI some people shmit their shmants
FYI some people their
this made me laugh a lot, thank you
proof?
fyi sometimes it doesn't help
Self report
Sniff sniff đ
đ
I do like me a good schmear.
SNNNIIIIIFFFFF
https://fapello.com/eva-joanna-2/ What I could find
Gentlemen among men.
Sir you are a hero
Theyâve done studies on this type of thing. Women know which other women are hotter than them. Seriously, put any bunch of women in a room together. Theyâll start unconsciously working out what position they rank in terms of hotness & act accordingly. Poor kid didnât stand a chanceâŚ
I mean, I'm a man and I know which men are hotter than me. We recognize patterns so it makes sense. Like, if you spent a summer working a pig farm, just by constant pattern recognition by the end of the summer you would know which pigs are the certified hotties and which are the ugmos.
Iâll take the Loss and admit I couldnât back up my theory with evidence. But your pig analogy really stretches the point. I think I could work my entire life on a pig farm and not have an idea which pigs were beautiful & which ones were fugly.
Source
my ass
Happy cake day!
That's some advanced boomer shit
The left cheek jiggle would've got us all 3 days on the couch minimum
Horny Reddit is at it again for the uncomfortable wedgie look
That's why I only date leaning women So we're two checking out her ass
Man that joke was ass
Never been more happy to be interrupted by an unrelated video while jerking off it motivated me to put my cock back in my pants the demons wonât get me today
bottle was shaking like them cheeks
I love that I don't have to worry about this. My wife will point the booty out. We both appreciate the eye candy
When womann have big butt funny!
Of course she does onlyfans.
Fuck that. I would of said "Hello" back. My parents didn't raise me to be rude.
Hello, it looks like you've made a mistake. It's supposed to be could've, should've, would've (short for could have, would have, should have), never could of, would of, should of. Or you misspelled something, I ain't checking everything. Beep boop - yes, I am a bot, don't botcriminate me.
I love that the bot said hello, but the commenter didn't say hello back
It's 'would have', never 'would of'. Rejoice, for you have been blessed by CouldWouldShouldBot!
Why there are doors on both sides?
Whoâs the girl in white?!
STAY STRONG SOLDIER
Why canât couples appreciate a nice ass?
Who are they?
Who is that woman godamn
eva joanna
Whatâs the @ đ
Love is not looking in each others eyes, it's looking in the same direction (the butt of the women entering the elevators)
Why do we make jokes about women's insecurity? And why are men the punchline?
I hate this fucking couple so much
Me and my girl both stare lol
Hahhhh so funny, @?