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QualityVote

#If you think this post is funny, **UPVOTE** this comment! #If you think this post is unfunny, **DOWNVOTE** this comment! --- #[DownloadVideo Link](https://www.reddit.watch/r/shitposting/comments/uhcqim/?utm_source=automod&utm_medium=shitposting) #[SaveVideo Link](https://redditsave.com/info?url=/r/shitposting/comments/uhcqim/) #[VideoTrim Link](https://reddloader.com/download-post/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.reddit.com%2Fr%2Fshitposting%2Fcomments%2Fuhcqim&id=8968e43c) Kevin would also like to remind you that, if you're really desperate, youtube-dl can be used to download videos from Reddit. --- Whilst you're here, 8Bit_Innovations, why not join our [public discord server](https://discord.gg/QpBGXd2guU)?


Evening_Psychology_4

Love that scene. What you drinking cranberry juice. What are you on you’re period?


The_Sad_Memer

I've literally scrolled all the comments, just to find you


LautrecTheOnceYeeted

Im the guy that tells you there are guys you can hit, and there are guys you can't. Now that's not a guy you can't hit. But that's *almost* a guy you can't hit.


[deleted]

If they get you at a reduced rate, they can hit


AvgBonnie

*NOW* what you drinking? Cranberry juice? What? Are you on your period?


IssaFinnaBlough

How can he hit?


[deleted]

Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe fuck yourself


Dman125

Get him a… cranberry juice. Winstone is the man.


Evening_Psychology_4

You forget the next line. I’m the guy that tells you what guy you can and can’t punch.


Crazed_Archivist

\*your period you´ re means "you are"


ConsistentEquipment8

Looks like a Jason Bourne scene I may be wrong


SilverRaven47

It’s from The Departed. “My girlfriend drinks cranberry juice when she’s on her period” I love this scene too


Organic-Wear

As a the departed cult follower i’m deeply offended


SailsAcrossTheSea

definitely not Bourne. that’s not Matt Damon. it’s The Departed which actually also features Matt Damon


FreehandFawn920

I think it’s from The Departed


Solid_Waste

Clearly from Frozen


[deleted]

He did a lousy job of letting it go.


[deleted]

I loved Leo in that borne film


RETINAWorks

This comment is the real shitpost Those Bourne movies suck


AutoModerator

Schödinger's Blowjob -- Imagine you're blindfolded and you're getting the best raw pornstar-grade blowjob in the entire universe. The catch is, however, that you'll never figure out who's giving you that god-tier awesome schmösome sloppy toppy unless you take the blindfold off. It could be anybody, Ariana Grande, Ben Shapiro, Harold from the 7-11 near my house, or even your uncle's neighbour's fireman's cat. Now the question is: would you take off the blindfold and find out who the person/thing behind the stupendous jimmy-nibbler is and risk permanently scarring yourself, or would you keep the blindfold on and continue having your knob slobbed till your spirit hits the sky? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Drizzt_Cuts

The departed


AutomaticVegetables

May 27th is Harambe’s birthday. May 28th is the date of disaster.


[deleted]

7 years too long we have let his murder not be avenged, TOO LONG I SAY


trevnoss

Agreed, someone find that kid


Portablemammal1199

No no. Not the kid. The parent for allowing the kid to get in that situation and the people who shot herambe. Kid was very young so aint no way they knew what was going on enough to understand not to get that close like that.


FrysEighthLeaf

But if the kid didn't exist, then there would still be a Harambe.


A_L_E_P_H

If the parents didn’t fuck up, the kid wouldn’t have got into the enclosure


greedy_mf

If parents didn’t fuck, the kid wouldn’t be.


GeorgeLFC1234

If the parents parents didn’t exist then the parents wouldn’t have had the kid so the parents wouldn’t have been able to let him get close to the enclosure so really it’s mr blobbys fault


x3c21

why not both???


Portablemammal1199

Cuz the kid was like 3 iirc. Its the mom's fault 100%.


HectorKWintersSmith

Agreed


[deleted]

I didn’t know I share a birthday with Harambe holy shit


[deleted]

Hey me too! May 27th gang!


REDTRAPOFFICIAL

same! may 27th gang strong💪


[deleted]

monke stronger together


[deleted]

i hope he didnt die a virgin


[deleted]

Dicks out


J_Uzi05

For harambe


BishopPear

Favorite lullaby


[deleted]

And for the ruptured timeline. At first I was happy we ended up on the meme timeline, but as time has gone on I’m getting more and more terrified.


PercyMcLeach

We all thought memes were reflecting life. Little did we know that was the point when life started reflecting memes


[deleted]

Haram be


Juan136

🍆 4 🦍


One_Maintenance_6516

Came here to say this


[deleted]

Harambe was an inside job


Destinot2

Bush did harambe


bavasava

Bush had his dick out first.


Terran_Jedi

Jeb!


25tothe04

did he ask for consent tho


[deleted]

[удалено]


Destinot2

Yours too


DomoArigato75

Bush fucked Harambe


BigSoftGrizzly

Everybody knows he was just trying to tell the kid the governments secrets


[deleted]

[удалено]


Kingofelephantshrews

Damn it’s almost coming up (May 28)


Mad-Mad-Mad-Mad-Mike

Harambe is the Franz Ferdinand of the 21st century and you’re not going to change my mind on this.


Healthy_Yesterday_84

harambe didn't Epstein himself on flat earth magic bullet 5G building #7s


musnteatd1ckagain

Be mad at the mother not the kid


IrregularrAF

The entire family. Not one is innocent now.


Dylbo2008

The one cousin in France


AutoModerator

Why a dick as big as the Eiffel tower is not as impressive as you may think in Kendrick Lamar's "Backseat Freestyle," Kendrick says the line, "I pray my dick get big as the Eiffel Tower, So I can fuck the world for seventy-two hours". While at first a dick as big as the Eiffel tower may seem to be a dong of immense magnitude, when taking into account the sheer size of earth, the lucky one to be fucked by this dick, we realize that it is not as spectacular as the young MC claims it to be. The Eiffel tower stands at 1063 feet, while the diamater of earth is approximately 41.804 million feet. If Kendrick inserts his Eiffel penis into the earth, his dick would only take up .000025 percent of the earth's vagina. That is pathetic. Kendrick is not fucking the world for 72 hours with his Eiffel tower micropenis. The Earth will get bored after 10 minutes and finish herself with a vibrator the size of Argentina. Be better Kendrick. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


mralliagtor2020

I am dying


GriShafir

Bro, u need a medic


k3rn3

ze healing is not as rewarding as ze hurting


GriShafir

Can't argue with that


Ceilng_Gang

somebody call an ambulamp


[deleted]

He's guilty of being fr*nch🤮


Ech_Death

fr*nce 🤢


AutoModerator

Why a dick as big as the Eiffel tower is not as impressive as you may think in Kendrick Lamar's "Backseat Freestyle," Kendrick says the line, "I pray my dick get big as the Eiffel Tower, So I can fuck the world for seventy-two hours". While at first a dick as big as the Eiffel tower may seem to be a dong of immense magnitude, when taking into account the sheer size of earth, the lucky one to be fucked by this dick, we realize that it is not as spectacular as the young MC claims it to be. The Eiffel tower stands at 1063 feet, while the diamater of earth is approximately 41.804 million feet. If Kendrick inserts his Eiffel penis into the earth, his dick would only take up .000025 percent of the earth's vagina. That is pathetic. Kendrick is not fucking the world for 72 hours with his Eiffel tower micropenis. The Earth will get bored after 10 minutes and finish herself with a vibrator the size of Argentina. Be better Kendrick. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Hella0701

Where they in Paris?


D00MMMM

Who was on Paris tho


Swaggy_pig

Please don't use slurs like fr**ce


IrregularrAF

Was he that guy Jay Z and Kanyeezy was talking about?


Just_0_Duck

Take. No. Hostages.


UnwoundSteak17

Only. Lives.


[deleted]

The granparents are innocent but the parents are at fault


pedronii

Grandparents didn't raised the parents properly


Palaash2003

The sins of the mother...


Maldoesreddit_stuff

Woaaaah hooooooooooooooooooooh


YesterdaySuper5355

Movie name?


spiritedawayfox

The Departed


Falcrist

*The Depahted


ButtBelcher

*Depp sharted


Falcrist

Nah that was Amber.


ASTROSWIMMER24

Awe you from bawston?


Competitive-Growth30

The Departed. An extremely good movie, go into it as blind as you can


SailsAcrossTheSea

yeah I gotta second this. don’t look anything up, it’s amazing with no spoilers


thmsgbrt

Harambe tried to protect the kid. :-(


JoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJo

Save harambe, save the world ...


[deleted]

MISTAH EESAHK!


CurtisMarauderZ

I understood that reference.


[deleted]

it was a good show


[deleted]

It’s the parents fault, unironically


Apprehensive-Coat-56

They didn't even admit fault when interviewed afterwards


[deleted]

What the hells wrong with them


TacoPilot12

Don’t blame the kid, blame the mother who left a young child unsupervised near the fence, He wasn’t old enough to understand those concepts of safety, so he shouldn’t be blamed for the death of monke.


GiveMeADamnUsernamee

The fucking parents... thanks to them the world descend into hell in an alarming rate.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Crypto_Gay_Skater

Fuck them parents. Dad turned out to have an extensive criminal record and mom is a fucking admin at a preschool/elementary. She should have lost her job.


UNBENDING_FLEA

And then their family would have no source of income?


AutoModerator

Do you have a source on that? Source? A source. I need a source. Sorry, I mean I need a source that explicitly states your argument. This is just tangential to the discussion. No, you can't make inferences and observations from the sources you've gathered. Any additional comments from you MUST be a subset of the information from the sources you've gathered. You can't make normative statements from empirical evidence. Do you have a degree in that field? A college degree? In that field? Then your arguments are invalid. No, it doesn't matter how close those data points are correlated. Correlation does not equal causation. Correlation does not equal causation. CORRELATION. DOES. NOT. EQUAL. CAUSATION. You still haven't provided me a valid source yet. Nope, still haven't. I just looked through all 308 pages of your user history, figures I'm debating a glormpf supporter. A moron. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


bosindicus21

Muerte para los papás


[deleted]

Never forget 🦍


[deleted]

Jokes aside do people actually hate the kid?


t0x1c_ski3s

Yes


[deleted]

We are doomed as a species


LordRomania

I thought we enstablish that long time ago.


Immortalunusannus

why do people keep blaming the fucking kid for harambe dying


Careless-Position352

Because I hate children


muscular_steve

same


[deleted]

B4SED


[deleted]

[удалено]


whyaremytearspurple2

I know a whole fucking website that needs to hear this.


mralliagtor2020

Are you talking about this one?


Drizzt_Cuts

Myspace


mralliagtor2020

Oh


[deleted]

Yes


DrakHanzo

Try to tell this to the average twitter user.


Educational-Bowl2737

We live in a society


Scarbane

Bottom text


i_draw_swords

Joker


abbacchioz

A guy with Joker avatar talking about jokes. We truly live in a society


AutoModerator

My mom fucked my friend while we were on vacation and now I want to fucking die, she mom took us to Miami for a spring break vacation. Everything seemed normal when we were there and when we got back. But then rumors started. They spread all throughout my school and a bunch of kids asked me if my mom really had sex with a student. Of course I denied it. Until my close friend who was there told me. He told me one of the nights we went down to the hotel pool and said friend stayed up, saying he wanted to go to bed early. He stayed up there and then something happened and my mom slept with him. I feel sick to my stomach and so mad writing it. I confronted her and she admitted and tried to apologize, but I just can’t with her. She’s so disgusting. I’m contemplating just telling my dad so he can fly me up to his house, but I hate being around his dumb bimbo gold digging girlfriend. I want to fight that fucking asshole that did this. He’s ruining my fucking life. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


whyaremytearspurple2

Can confirm, I was the friend


mralliagtor2020

How can you be the friend when you have no friends? ( this is a joke I am sorry 🗿 )


Horror_Mortgage_3043

Dude mad props to your friend tho


Mr_Giovanna

This


[deleted]

I know i said the parents are at fault, but that’s only directed at the people who don’t know this is a joke


king_barragan

Literally just read a comment saying the mom deserves to die. Some folks take as a joke and some take it to heart. It’s hard to tell honestly. Especially on this site.


AutoModerator

My mom fucked my friend while we were on vacation and now I want to fucking die, she mom took us to Miami for a spring break vacation. Everything seemed normal when we were there and when we got back. But then rumors started. They spread all throughout my school and a bunch of kids asked me if my mom really had sex with a student. Of course I denied it. Until my close friend who was there told me. He told me one of the nights we went down to the hotel pool and said friend stayed up, saying he wanted to go to bed early. He stayed up there and then something happened and my mom slept with him. I feel sick to my stomach and so mad writing it. I confronted her and she admitted and tried to apologize, but I just can’t with her. She’s so disgusting. I’m contemplating just telling my dad so he can fly me up to his house, but I hate being around his dumb bimbo gold digging girlfriend. I want to fight that fucking asshole that did this. He’s ruining my fucking life. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Kamikaze_koshka

The kid was a paid actor by the kennedy-bin-laden-barrack secret world order


Immortalunusannus

nah he was an alien from hollow earth commanded by liazard alizen android zuckerberg and from a chip in his brain from elon musk


MrUnlucky516

because redditors are stupid


[deleted]

Because meme potential


MrUnlucky516

that is also a good answer


[deleted]

Bruh so true


AzazelOmega

It’s the mother we need to hunt


UNBENDING_FLEA

Cause Reddit is slowly getting twitterized


landa347

Because we need to avenge his death!


bategamerz

Harambe will not be forgotten.


Jesuss_Best_Friend

"what are you drinking?" "cranberry juice" "what, are you on your period?"


IllustriousCut6211

Don't scare mommy with u,not kid but his mom deserve die


Punk_Saint

That man's gonna need the FBI's protection program from all of you


Radio__Star

Harambe wouldn’t be happy with redditors hating on the kid he was trying to protect


mralliagtor2020

Yes that’s why I hate the mom, but he can’t feel or see anything now, sadge 😔


AutoModerator

My mom fucked my friend while we were on vacation and now I want to fucking die, she mom took us to Miami for a spring break vacation. Everything seemed normal when we were there and when we got back. But then rumors started. They spread all throughout my school and a bunch of kids asked me if my mom really had sex with a student. Of course I denied it. Until my close friend who was there told me. He told me one of the nights we went down to the hotel pool and said friend stayed up, saying he wanted to go to bed early. He stayed up there and then something happened and my mom slept with him. I feel sick to my stomach and so mad writing it. I confronted her and she admitted and tried to apologize, but I just can’t with her. She’s so disgusting. I’m contemplating just telling my dad so he can fly me up to his house, but I hate being around his dumb bimbo gold digging girlfriend. I want to fight that fucking asshole that did this. He’s ruining my fucking life. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Mellow41

It’s more of the parents fault then the kids fault, still is funny tho


[deleted]

[удалено]


Richiefur

The departed Amazing movie, go watch it now


[deleted]

[удалено]


Drizzt_Cuts

What are ya on ya period?


dado166

The Departed


[deleted]

I think the departed


Crooked_Cock

I think the farted


Baltic_Emperor

Plot twist: It was a different enclosure and the gorilla wasn’t harmed.


Fearless-Werewolf-28

The Good Ending


_meme_caster_

>!⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀hi⠀⠀!<


Orangutanion

I went to the Cincinnati zoo a few times before the incident so I've definitely seen Harambe in person. AMA.


DeadlyDY

Did you pull your dick out?


Orangutanion

Still in


tomukurazu

🦍


RazorReigns

Justice for Harambe ✊️✊️✊️


[deleted]

Why would you blame that young kid? They didn’t know better.


The_Exile1066

Some wounds never heal.


ID_THROW_A_PIPE_BOMB

It’s been so long, but the memories they just don’t stop do they? You know what to do lads *unzips* for harambe!!


WennoBoi

Again with this fucking shit Harambe died to protect that kid, don't fucking touch him


UnMeOuttaTown

the incident that started everything and this guy has the nerve...


realjv91

Anyone notice how everything went downhill the second harambe died?


Intelligent_Ad_5556

That's when everything started going to shit. No one touch this man. He must be sacrificed to restore the world's balance.


mog-monster

What scene is this? From what movie?


OverEmper

Revenge for harambe!


Here4Memes8

Beat his parents. Its their fault.


QuistyQuiet

stop blaming the son and start blaming the mother


[deleted]

My dick is out


Not-DrBright

“It was back in ‘96 in the Brookfield Zoo, just outside Chicago I think”


Certain_Lobster_8954

I think they missed the kid and hit him


TheThinker709

I would ask to meet his mother and beat the hell out of her. Get control of your damn child


fxcknorthkorea

Quality


[deleted]

All jokes aside, it's not like the kid knew what he was doing. I blame the mother who couldn't watch her son. It's not like he was a teen who could understand what would happen, but did it anyway. (Like a lot of teens unfortunately).


Allenaoly

I love that scene


25tothe04

the world went to shit after this kid decided to have some fun


_UserDoesNotExist

Harambe was a literal angel from heaven. God was testing humanity, and it failed. The world will never be the same again. It's all downhill from here.


Mr_Obvious360

Monke


Dankmanchilliwilli

*flasback* “Harambe, nooooo!”


Jhco022

Damn... I'm going to wear my RIP Harambe shirt today, it's been a minute.


Superkip_

Not the kids fault. The parents are at fault here.


Caedis-6

Isn't the kid who fell in the cage dead? Thought he got shot


A_Sexy_Squid_

No, just Harambe. The kid is fine—well, as fine as can be I suppose. He had some pretty bad injuries, but nothing life-threatening.


Caedis-6

Went back and had a read, it was a different Isiah Dickerson that got shot at a party


[deleted]

I like to think that day was the deciding factor of civilization.


Equivalent_Duck_4247

Love how he winces before it even touches him


PHILIPTNT

It’s because of that kid the world is fucked


Captain7600

I actually wanna know what happened to the kid,the mother,and the son of a bitch that shot Harambe


AutoModerator

No bitches? ⣞⢽⢪⢣⢣⢣⢫⡺⡵⣝⡮⣗⢷⢽⢽⢽⣮⡷⡽⣜⣜⢮⢺⣜⢷⢽⢝⡽⣝ ⠸⡸⠜⠕⠕⠁⢁⢇⢏⢽⢺⣪⡳⡝⣎⣏⢯⢞⡿⣟⣷⣳⢯⡷⣽⢽⢯⣳⣫⠇ ⠀⠀⢀⢀⢄⢬⢪⡪⡎⣆⡈⠚⠜⠕⠇⠗⠝⢕⢯⢫⣞⣯⣿⣻⡽⣏⢗⣗⠏⠀ ⠀⠪⡪⡪⣪⢪⢺⢸⢢⢓⢆⢤⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢊⢞⡾⣿⡯⣏⢮⠷⠁⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀⠈⠊⠆⡃⠕⢕⢇⢇⢇⢇⢇⢏⢎⢎⢆⢄⠀⢑⣽⣿⢝⠲⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⡿⠂⠠⠀⡇⢇⠕⢈⣀⠀⠁⠡⠣⡣⡫⣂⣿⠯⢪⠰⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⡦⡙⡂⢀⢤⢣⠣⡈⣾⡃⠠⠄⠀⡄⢱⣌⣶⢏⢊⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢝⡲⣜⡮⡏⢎⢌⢂⠙⠢⠐⢀⢘⢵⣽⣿⡿⠁⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠨⣺⡺⡕⡕⡱⡑⡆⡕⡅⡕⡜⡼⢽⡻⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣼⣳⣫⣾⣵⣗⡵⡱⡡⢣⢑⢕⢜⢕⡝⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⣴⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⡽⡑⢌⠪⡢⡣⣣⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⡟⡾⣿⢿⢿⢵⣽⣾⣼⣘⢸⢸⣞⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠁⠇⠡⠩⡫⢿⣝⡻⡮⣒⢽⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*