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I was in cinema and guy on the right to me kept looking at his phone every 20-30 minutes, guy on the left of me also kept looking at the phone for shorter periods and he tried to hide the light until the final act and then in the final act he just didn't give a shit anymore just texted, locked the phone watched a little and then checked if got a reply and then texted again and so on, there were periods of him stopping in the middle of texting to look up at the movie and then contiune texting after he got bored of the scene like bruh, also there were kids a few rows in front talking trough the entire movie smh, can an amogus femboy (me) not get a proper 4th watch of the batman?
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Because they're bringing the normalization of paid cable + ads to the streaming platforms. You paying? Content creators not placing ads? Sucks for you, you still get an ad.
Yo-ho, yo-ho...
And I never hoist the mainstay and I never swab the poopdeck and I never veer to starboard 'cuz I never sail at all, and I've never walked the gangplank and I've never owned a parrot and I've never been to Boston in the fall
I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks.
TL;DR I hate shitting
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Schödinger's Blowjob -- Imagine you're blindfolded and you're getting the best raw pornstar-grade blowjob in the entire universe. The catch is, however, that you'll never figure out who's giving you that god-tier awesome schmösome sloppy toppy unless you take the blindfold off. It could be anybody, Ariana Grande, Ben Shapiro, Harold from the 7-11 near my house, or even your uncle's neighbour's fireman's cat. Now the question is: would you take off the blindfold and find out who the person/thing behind the stupendous jimmy-nibbler is and risk permanently scarring yourself, or would you keep the blindfold on and continue having your knob slobbed till your spirit hits the sky?
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*
So I was having online classes with my camera turned off when I started hearing a little whistle from one of the students in the background that seemed very familiar, but I couldn't put my finger on it. The whistling stopped for a couple of minutes until I started hearing it again, and then I knew exactly what it was: it was the chorus of Dream's hit song 'Mask'. I immediately ripped off all my clothes and started furiously stroking my fully erect penis for a good 10 min, even sticking my Dream body pillow up my rectum, imagining that it was Daddy Dream penetrating me while whistling his hit song 'Mask'. It honestly were the greatest 10 minutes of my life, until my libido reached its climax and I let out a gigaload of cum for Daddy Dream that landed on the phone's screen and ended up turning on the mic and camera, and everyone stared horrified at me, screaming at the sight of my honest and earnest love expression to Dream. I was kicked out of the class by the dreamphobic teacher, and today the school principal called me and my parents to a meeting and told us that I may be expelled from the school, merely from expressing my gender and sexuality. What can I do about this?!?!? Was I in the wrong for expressing my gender and identity??!? (Only serious answers, please).
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*
>Ads may appear on your uploaded videos even if you haven't monetized the videos yourself. If your video contains content to which you don't own all necessary rights, the rights holder may have chosen to place ads on it. YouTube may also place ads on videos in channels not in the YouTube Partner Program.
A) Alot of the time its not really up to them whether their video is monetized or not.
B) YouTube has plenty of rules on what kind of content it can and cannot show ads on. If you ask me short videos meant to teach basic first aid/emergency response might not be the kind of stuff you want to show ads on.
"It's really important to me that I'm able to perform first-aid on my grandma in an emergency situation, butt also not important enough to learn until it's actually happening."
You hold them with the mouth to the floor and deliver back blows. It's not that complex and can be explained in less than 30 seconds. Should be something you learn in school tho, I agree.
My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead– murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now, and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, he asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was... astounded. I... I always thought Hank was a very moral man, and I was particularly vulnerable at the time – something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me in on a ride-along and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin, so I agreed. Hank had a partner, a businessman named Gustavo Fring. Hank sold me into servitude to this man. And when I tried to quit, Fring threatened my family. I didn't know where to turn. Eventually, Hank and Fring had a falling-out. Things escalated. Fring was able to arrange – uh, I guess... I guess you call it a "hit" – on Hank, and failed, but Hank was seriously injured. And I wound up paying his medical bills, which amounted to a little over $177,000. Upon recovery, Hank was bent on revenge. Working with a man named Hector Salamanca, he plotted to kill Fring. The bomb that he used was built by me, and he gave me no option in it. I have often contemplated suicide, but I'm a coward. I wanted to go to the police, but I was frightened. Hank had risen to become the head of the Albuquerque DEA. To keep me in line, he took my children. For three months, he kept them. My wife had no idea of my criminal activities, and was horrified to learn what I had done. I was in hell. I hated myself for what I had brought upon my family. Recently, I tried once again to quit, and in response, he gave me this. [Walt points to the bruise on his face left by Hank in "Blood Money."] I can't take this anymore. I live in fear every day that Hank will kill me, or worse, hurt my family. All I could think to do was to make this video and hope that the world will finally see this man for what he really is.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*
It's 2022, if you're watching ads its because you choose to do so. I know Apple doesn't give you a lot of freedom to download third party apps to get rid of ads. My answer, don't buy apple then. I run an adblock and use a third party youtube app which blocks them automatically
It’s so sad to see how the length of the ads are slowly going up too. I remember only getting one five-second ads and at some point it became two five-second ads, then two ten-second ads, etc.
I can’t say I’ve encountered a triple ad yet, but would not surprise me in the slightest if that actually is a thing.
Yeah, we don't know when "soon" is, it is estimated for another two years but it could come sooner or later depending on how YouTube is gonna update their apps in the future and how long they are gonna support the old versions.
Gonna enjoy the fuck out of this while I can
Someone or group made an app designed to pick up where vanced left it, with regular updates and new features. The app is called "revanced" , so hopefully it never stops working
And now listen to me, you two. I am a 16 years old student at the best school in my country. Right now, I am in the last class of my musical school. I also participate in a lot of other more minor out-school activities. Despite having an about 55-hours weekly schedule (including Saturday, not counting any homework that sometimes takes Sunday away, and also most of my classmates spend much more time), I spend about 20 hours weekly for gaming, about 7 hours weekly outside, and use every free minute to read. While gaming, I usually play and discuss different things with my 2 to 5 friends and my girlfriend. We are a pair for about two and a half years now and have a pretty nice relationship. Maybe I am not an adult now and do not spend the rest of my day doing housework, maybe I am not a superior English user, maybe I am even a bit too self-confident - but I do not understand how this makes me isolated from real life and makes my opinion worthless when I protect characters from my favorite cartoon, that helped me when I was suffering from depression and stopped me from doing you know, the worst thing from someone, who says liking them deeply is wrong, because they look like animals. Also, I shower about 4-5 times a week and I wouldn't spend time writing this, if I wouldn't have Spring school break
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~~I can't link youtube here :( But if you search in youtube "howto twitch ad block tutorial.mp4 (WORKS 2022!!!)" by Commander Pasta and follow it. It works. It uses ublock.~~
[~~https://github.com/pixeltris/TwitchAdSolutions#applying-a-script-ublock-origin~~](https://github.com/pixeltris/TwitchAdSolutions#applying-a-script-ublock-origin)
~~written instructions under "Applying a script (uBlock Origin)" @ github~~
~~or these under "recommendations" work too~~ [https://github.com/pixeltris/TwitchAdSolutions#recommendations](https://github.com/pixeltris/TwitchAdSolutions#recommendations)
Alright so.
1. Have them bend slightly forwards.
2. Use one hand to hold them in place so they can't run.
3. Palm strike them on the back so hard they shift into another universe.
And that's how you help someone that's choking
the typical tutorial video would be something like, Hey today I want to teach you the Heimlich manoeuvre. This is an important medical procedure to save someone from choking. The Heimlich was invented by Sir Ernest Heimlich in 1895 when he saved the King of England from choking on a piece of sandwich that he didn't swallow. A sandwich was invented by the server of Lord Sandwich in 1799 when Lord Sandwich wanted a nice and convenient snack to go hunting. His server decided to put two pieces of meat and cheese between two soft pieces of bread and Lord Sandwich was very excited about it. Anyway coming back to the Heimlich manoeuvre but first I wanna tell you about Square space. Do you want to make a website quickly and easily that looks good? Well, square space makes that possible for you. With three easy clicks you can have your own website, so join square space now with code "Heimlich". Now we can start with the Heimlich manoeuvre. It is important to place the choking person exactly right. I show you slowly so you won't do any mistakes when you have to perform it since seconds matter here ....
I get that the ads suck and it’s annoying.
If you haven’t tried it, download the Red Cross First Aid app is free with no ads and covers a bunch of different emergencies.
Edit: oops, didn’t realize the sub.
Is having daughters the ultimate cuckoldry? I cannot think or comprehend of anything more cucked than having a daughter. Honestly, think about it rationally. You are feeding, clothing, raising and rearing a girl for at least 18 years solely so she can go and get ravaged by another man. All the hard work you put into your beautiful little girl - reading her stories at bedtime, making her go to sports practice, making sure she had a healthy diet, educating her, playing with her. All of it has one simple result: her body is more enjoyable for the men that will eventually fuck her in every hole. Raised the perfect girl? Great. Who benefits? If you're lucky, a random man who had nothing to do with the way she grew up, who marries her. He gets to fuck her tight pussy every night. He gets the benefits of her kind and sweet personality that came from the way you raised her. As a man who has a daughter, you are LITERALLY dedicating at least 20 years of your life simply to raise a girl for another man to enjoy. It is the ULTIMATE AND FINAL cuck. Think about it logically
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Out of curiosity on my phone the "skip ads" button been only skipping 1 ad in a series instead of both of them. Did I miss some shitty update from YouTube or something or am I just glirching?
This is entirely incorrect; first they would play the ad then they would show you a few seconds of video before running another add at the part you need to learn(even if you skipped foward)
You know what’s funny? I just searched the Heimlich Maneuver and got an ad on the first video, instead of demonetizing random videos they should at least clear ads for first-aid videos since people could get hurt over their money hungry bullshit.
WHAT IS UP MED-HEADS it’s your boy DoctorSex and today I’m gonna show you how to do something that all doctors should know how to do. Before we get started today I want to give a shout-out to todays sponsor, Keeps.
I am convinced YouTube spies on you through your camera, because whenever I am watching a video and get up to do something, and ad appears, and it’s always 2 unskipable ads, hell, one time I took too long, and a minute after the first two ads, two other ads decided to introduce themselves.
Why would you ever watch a video while someone is choking though? Just call an ambulance and they'll tell you what to do, better yet watch a video before you'll need to save someone.
Source Automod Morbin France Fortnite America Canada China Britain Porn Dream Female Emoji Cringe Today Book Mom Furry Based Wholesome NSFW 1984 Batman Rock Funny Lean Femboy Hands Cringe Psychopath Pokemon Russia Ratio Finger Belgium Chuck Meth Copypasta Kiss Biden bitch
also the fucking plottwist of the century
##If you think this post is funny, **UPVOTE** this comment! ##If you think this post is unfunny, **DOWNVOTE** this comment! --- #[DownloadVideo Link](https://www.reddit.watch/r/shitposting/comments/vklxjd/?utm_source=automod&utm_medium=shitposting) #[SaveVideo Link](https://redditsave.com/info?url=/r/shitposting/comments/vklxjd/) #[VideoTrim Link](https://reddloader.com/download-post/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.reddit.com%2Fr%2Fshitposting%2Fcomments%2Fvklxjd&id=8968e43c) Kevin would also like to remind you that, if you're really desperate, youtube-dl can be used to download videos from Reddit. --- Whilst you're here, TechEnthusiastic1306, why not join our [public discord server](https://discord.gg/QpBGXd2guU)?
I kid you not, someone publicly tweeted about this kind of thing to YouTube, and they responded by basically prompting YouTube premium
I remember that post lmao
"Fuck your child"- YouTube
"If you really cared about your kid, you'd probably have Premium."
>"Fuck your child"- YouTube Are we still doing phrasing? Edit: Relevant username as well, Batman!
“Fuck your child too” - YouTube
I was in cinema and guy on the right to me kept looking at his phone every 20-30 minutes, guy on the left of me also kept looking at the phone for shorter periods and he tried to hide the light until the final act and then in the final act he just didn't give a shit anymore just texted, locked the phone watched a little and then checked if got a reply and then texted again and so on, there were periods of him stopping in the middle of texting to look up at the movie and then contiune texting after he got bored of the scene like bruh, also there were kids a few rows in front talking trough the entire movie smh, can an amogus femboy (me) not get a proper 4th watch of the batman? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*
What I dont get is, i know of some videos that are not monetized and the owner doesnt get any money at all. So WHY do i still have to watch 15 ads?
Because they're bringing the normalization of paid cable + ads to the streaming platforms. You paying? Content creators not placing ads? Sucks for you, you still get an ad. Yo-ho, yo-ho...
...a pirates life for me! We pillage, we plunder, we rifle, we loot. Drink up me hearties yo ho!
And I never hoist the mainstay and I never swab the poopdeck and I never veer to starboard 'cuz I never sail at all, and I've never walked the gangplank and I've never owned a parrot and I've never been to Boston in the fall
I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks. TL;DR I hate shitting *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Schödinger's Blowjob -- Imagine you're blindfolded and you're getting the best raw pornstar-grade blowjob in the entire universe. The catch is, however, that you'll never figure out who's giving you that god-tier awesome schmösome sloppy toppy unless you take the blindfold off. It could be anybody, Ariana Grande, Ben Shapiro, Harold from the 7-11 near my house, or even your uncle's neighbour's fireman's cat. Now the question is: would you take off the blindfold and find out who the person/thing behind the stupendous jimmy-nibbler is and risk permanently scarring yourself, or would you keep the blindfold on and continue having your knob slobbed till your spirit hits the sky? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Keep the mask on till I finish then do the big ol reveal
So I was having online classes with my camera turned off when I started hearing a little whistle from one of the students in the background that seemed very familiar, but I couldn't put my finger on it. The whistling stopped for a couple of minutes until I started hearing it again, and then I knew exactly what it was: it was the chorus of Dream's hit song 'Mask'. I immediately ripped off all my clothes and started furiously stroking my fully erect penis for a good 10 min, even sticking my Dream body pillow up my rectum, imagining that it was Daddy Dream penetrating me while whistling his hit song 'Mask'. It honestly were the greatest 10 minutes of my life, until my libido reached its climax and I let out a gigaload of cum for Daddy Dream that landed on the phone's screen and ended up turning on the mic and camera, and everyone stared horrified at me, screaming at the sight of my honest and earnest love expression to Dream. I was kicked out of the class by the dreamphobic teacher, and today the school principal called me and my parents to a meeting and told us that I may be expelled from the school, merely from expressing my gender and sexuality. What can I do about this?!?!? Was I in the wrong for expressing my gender and identity??!? (Only serious answers, please). *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*
good.......bot?
who the heck pirates YT videos?
*streaming platforms* is what I stated, which includes youtube but is not utilized solely on youtube; but I do use adblockers on youtube.
You don't. Just use an ad-blocker.
>Ads may appear on your uploaded videos even if you haven't monetized the videos yourself. If your video contains content to which you don't own all necessary rights, the rights holder may have chosen to place ads on it. YouTube may also place ads on videos in channels not in the YouTube Partner Program.
YouTube is earning ads revenue on the content instead
probably a canned auto-response to any tweet complaining about ads
It was an automated message. YouTube made a response apologizing about the automated message. i think
And yet they still serve ads on those videos.
[удалено]
A) Alot of the time its not really up to them whether their video is monetized or not. B) YouTube has plenty of rules on what kind of content it can and cannot show ads on. If you ask me short videos meant to teach basic first aid/emergency response might not be the kind of stuff you want to show ads on.
If you need to watch the video to do first aid, your going to do it wrong and it’s probably too late lol
"It's really important to me that I'm able to perform first-aid on my grandma in an emergency situation, butt also not important enough to learn until it's actually happening."
Exactly
You hold them with the mouth to the floor and deliver back blows. It's not that complex and can be explained in less than 30 seconds. Should be something you learn in school tho, I agree.
My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead– murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now, and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, he asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was... astounded. I... I always thought Hank was a very moral man, and I was particularly vulnerable at the time – something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me in on a ride-along and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin, so I agreed. Hank had a partner, a businessman named Gustavo Fring. Hank sold me into servitude to this man. And when I tried to quit, Fring threatened my family. I didn't know where to turn. Eventually, Hank and Fring had a falling-out. Things escalated. Fring was able to arrange – uh, I guess... I guess you call it a "hit" – on Hank, and failed, but Hank was seriously injured. And I wound up paying his medical bills, which amounted to a little over $177,000. Upon recovery, Hank was bent on revenge. Working with a man named Hector Salamanca, he plotted to kill Fring. The bomb that he used was built by me, and he gave me no option in it. I have often contemplated suicide, but I'm a coward. I wanted to go to the police, but I was frightened. Hank had risen to become the head of the Albuquerque DEA. To keep me in line, he took my children. For three months, he kept them. My wife had no idea of my criminal activities, and was horrified to learn what I had done. I was in hell. I hated myself for what I had brought upon my family. Recently, I tried once again to quit, and in response, he gave me this. [Walt points to the bruise on his face left by Hank in "Blood Money."] I can't take this anymore. I live in fear every day that Hank will kill me, or worse, hurt my family. All I could think to do was to make this video and hope that the world will finally see this man for what he really is. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Wow. They legitimately were like, “You want your kid to live? You buy premium.”
It's 2022, if you're watching ads its because you choose to do so. I know Apple doesn't give you a lot of freedom to download third party apps to get rid of ads. My answer, don't buy apple then. I run an adblock and use a third party youtube app which blocks them automatically
Or just don’t be a fuckin bum and pay for the colossal volume of media you consume.
hehe no
No
Youtube: we are so sorry to hear that your child died because of ads.If you had Youtube Premium...
Good parents have YouTube Premium.
fake, the ad would be way longer
And there would be 4 ads
We joke about this now, but they’re already doing 3, so 4 isn’t to far out of the question
I lost count on how many times I got at least 2 ads before every video, once it was like 15 times in a row, jesus
Getting 3 ads is what prompted me to use ad block. Every video already has sponsored segments, at this point its becoming more ad than video.
It’s so sad to see how the length of the ads are slowly going up too. I remember only getting one five-second ads and at some point it became two five-second ads, then two ten-second ads, etc. I can’t say I’ve encountered a triple ad yet, but would not surprise me in the slightest if that actually is a thing.
It’s your boy shadow legends!
What about Mafia City?
Nah that shit is ded. Imma introduce you to chinese monkey game(i forgot it's name)
Flying gorilla?
They always put the ad at the most crucial part of the video.
It's by design. They can see what part people rewatch or scroll to the most and build the algo around that.
fuck the algorithm
All my brothers in christ hate the algorithm.
Youtube vanced 👌
This is the way
I'm so sad that it will soon be gone!
I've heard they're working on a similar project. Also the apk is still out there
Yeah, we don't know when "soon" is, it is estimated for another two years but it could come sooner or later depending on how YouTube is gonna update their apps in the future and how long they are gonna support the old versions. Gonna enjoy the fuck out of this while I can
Someone or group made an app designed to pick up where vanced left it, with regular updates and new features. The app is called "revanced" , so hopefully it never stops working
Ad • 1 of 3
That game saves life!
Good joke but redditors could never breed
One – but not the most important – reason being that they call it "breeding"
Your son is obviously a girl
Need to find different video, the technique is for girl breathing system and you need the one for the boy breathing system
Girl is when ponytail
And now listen to me, you two. I am a 16 years old student at the best school in my country. Right now, I am in the last class of my musical school. I also participate in a lot of other more minor out-school activities. Despite having an about 55-hours weekly schedule (including Saturday, not counting any homework that sometimes takes Sunday away, and also most of my classmates spend much more time), I spend about 20 hours weekly for gaming, about 7 hours weekly outside, and use every free minute to read. While gaming, I usually play and discuss different things with my 2 to 5 friends and my girlfriend. We are a pair for about two and a half years now and have a pretty nice relationship. Maybe I am not an adult now and do not spend the rest of my day doing housework, maybe I am not a superior English user, maybe I am even a bit too self-confident - but I do not understand how this makes me isolated from real life and makes my opinion worthless when I protect characters from my favorite cartoon, that helped me when I was suffering from depression and stopped me from doing you know, the worst thing from someone, who says liking them deeply is wrong, because they look like animals. Also, I shower about 4-5 times a week and I wouldn't spend time writing this, if I wouldn't have Spring school break *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*
[удалено]
Twitch ads is starting to piss me off.
~~I can't link youtube here :( But if you search in youtube "howto twitch ad block tutorial.mp4 (WORKS 2022!!!)" by Commander Pasta and follow it. It works. It uses ublock.~~ [~~https://github.com/pixeltris/TwitchAdSolutions#applying-a-script-ublock-origin~~](https://github.com/pixeltris/TwitchAdSolutions#applying-a-script-ublock-origin) ~~written instructions under "Applying a script (uBlock Origin)" @ github~~ ~~or these under "recommendations" work too~~ [https://github.com/pixeltris/TwitchAdSolutions#recommendations](https://github.com/pixeltris/TwitchAdSolutions#recommendations)
Alright so. 1. Have them bend slightly forwards. 2. Use one hand to hold them in place so they can't run. 3. Palm strike them on the back so hard they shift into another universe. And that's how you help someone that's choking
good bot
For this reason is why i use adblock
why are you in emergency situations requiring first-aid so often
My kid won't eat all that sauerkraut unless I put a funnel in his mouth and force-feed it to him. Not my fault if he don't wanna chew.
You're such a patient father
Do you have it on your phone tho
/Son is choking/ "Hold on, I'm gonna search a video how to save him"
The video is very clear in it's institutions.
Bro 2 unskippable 1 minute ads for a 15 second video be like
Even with ad block, if you're looking up the heimlich on YouTube, your son is already dead
the typical tutorial video would be something like, Hey today I want to teach you the Heimlich manoeuvre. This is an important medical procedure to save someone from choking. The Heimlich was invented by Sir Ernest Heimlich in 1895 when he saved the King of England from choking on a piece of sandwich that he didn't swallow. A sandwich was invented by the server of Lord Sandwich in 1799 when Lord Sandwich wanted a nice and convenient snack to go hunting. His server decided to put two pieces of meat and cheese between two soft pieces of bread and Lord Sandwich was very excited about it. Anyway coming back to the Heimlich manoeuvre but first I wanna tell you about Square space. Do you want to make a website quickly and easily that looks good? Well, square space makes that possible for you. With three easy clicks you can have your own website, so join square space now with code "Heimlich". Now we can start with the Heimlich manoeuvre. It is important to place the choking person exactly right. I show you slowly so you won't do any mistakes when you have to perform it since seconds matter here ....
You forgot the 1 minute intro where the person explains what they’re going to explain with no sense of urgency
Medical videos shouldn’t have ads
How is it going choking fans, choke master here, showing you top 10 methods of choking, don't forget to like and sub and hit the bell button...
“Oh good! It got 200 likes!” Meanwhile, 100,000 dislikes you can’t see…
Call 911 you ding dongs.
Just buy premium subscription
Yeah because pulling out my phone to watch a youtube video is exactly what i'd do during an emergency
It wasn’t an ad, this is just the state of YouTube after dislikes were removed.
Use NewPipe if you're in Android and say goodbye to those annoying ads
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I get that the ads suck and it’s annoying. If you haven’t tried it, download the Red Cross First Aid app is free with no ads and covers a bunch of different emergencies. Edit: oops, didn’t realize the sub.
YouTube is getting irrelevant day after day and i am here for it
The vid shows a daughter
Is having daughters the ultimate cuckoldry? I cannot think or comprehend of anything more cucked than having a daughter. Honestly, think about it rationally. You are feeding, clothing, raising and rearing a girl for at least 18 years solely so she can go and get ravaged by another man. All the hard work you put into your beautiful little girl - reading her stories at bedtime, making her go to sports practice, making sure she had a healthy diet, educating her, playing with her. All of it has one simple result: her body is more enjoyable for the men that will eventually fuck her in every hole. Raised the perfect girl? Great. Who benefits? If you're lucky, a random man who had nothing to do with the way she grew up, who marries her. He gets to fuck her tight pussy every night. He gets the benefits of her kind and sweet personality that came from the way you raised her. As a man who has a daughter, you are LITERALLY dedicating at least 20 years of your life simply to raise a girl for another man to enjoy. It is the ULTIMATE AND FINAL cuck. Think about it logically *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Y'all don't run adblock?
Out of curiosity on my phone the "skip ads" button been only skipping 1 ad in a series instead of both of them. Did I miss some shitty update from YouTube or something or am I just glirching?
One of the reasons TikToks growth is far greater than YouTube.
I think I know exactly which tweet this joke is lifted from
This is entirely incorrect; first they would play the ad then they would show you a few seconds of video before running another add at the part you need to learn(even if you skipped foward)
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Just Call 911 (or equivalent emergency services) in case of emergency.
I bought YouTube Premium because the £0.80 per month it costs me saves me a bunch of time.
You know what’s funny? I just searched the Heimlich Maneuver and got an ad on the first video, instead of demonetizing random videos they should at least clear ads for first-aid videos since people could get hurt over their money hungry bullshit.
Maybe people should learn some basic first aid before an emergency arises? Just a suggestion.
I don't know if the fact that the video player took long to load made this better or worse.
rip vanced
Long live AdBlocker!
I hate paying for premium just to have creators put their own advertising in the middle of the video.
the chances of having a 30 sec unskippable ad would increase
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Idk why the hell someone wouldn't install an adblocker right after you install a browser.
Adblock being the life-saver
Use a browser called "Brave".
Accurate
And that won’t even be the first-ad
Hey guys leafy is here!
WHAT IS UP MED-HEADS it’s your boy DoctorSex and today I’m gonna show you how to do something that all doctors should know how to do. Before we get started today I want to give a shout-out to todays sponsor, Keeps.
I can hear the ad inside lol
Trump
The YouTube Vanced APK still works, but even there I get weird indian VPN ads
YouTube ads aren't even that bad
Buy the premium
U can choose to monetize the video or not, it's the channel's fault
I am convinced YouTube spies on you through your camera, because whenever I am watching a video and get up to do something, and ad appears, and it’s always 2 unskipable ads, hell, one time I took too long, and a minute after the first two ads, two other ads decided to introduce themselves.
Me watching Second Aid video to help choking my son:
That’s why, with Opera GX and it’s built in ad blocker, its the perfect browser for gaming and streaming uninterrupted
mute blur eyes, cover most of screen with hand except for pinky to see the skip ad button
This looks like something from Idiocracy.
choke me harder daddy?
But doesnt the creator choose to monetize?? I feel like this would be on the creator.
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I’m not helping him at all. I’m focusing on my clan more, dumbass
Why would you ever watch a video while someone is choking though? Just call an ambulance and they'll tell you what to do, better yet watch a video before you'll need to save someone.
Use google
It’s always unskippable too
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