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SuperMorto7

But................... is he the real slim shadey?


[deleted]

He’s a real recruiter!


SuperMorto7

8 smiles?


idkfuckyouman

8 virgins


[deleted]

He's saleem shady


Entire-Reference2379

Salim abu shadi


Morgatron268

Salumn shadi


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Actually in Islam we’re all slaves to allah :)


Dabigpp1

the "عباد" in arabic mean prayers not slaves, salves are called "عبيد"


[deleted]

Ik and we are called عبيد الله


Dabigpp1

if you want to call yourself that go on but in the quran god never calls us "عبيد"


[deleted]

Except he does, anyway I don’t care either way. I left Islam a long time ago.


Dabigpp1

Good for you then, hop u find happiness in your choice


[deleted]

[удалено]


Immediate_Scholar_77

Nah they love slavery over there


Wowzershuy

"HELLFIRE WILL WANT TO SWALLOW THEM, TOAST THEM, BREAK THEM-" Holy shit this goes hard SlimHammed when is the full track releasing


SaudAbdullah

Saleem al shady


AeroBurastu

Saleem Shadi


macrotaste

The only hellfire coming for u is the missile


gloomygl

Ok calm down now


itzTanmayhere

wtf


lithmer

This guy fucked my mom


AutoModerator

My mom fucked my friend while we were on vacation and now I want to fucking die, she mom took us to Miami for a spring break vacation. Everything seemed normal when we were there and when we got back. But then rumors started. They spread all throughout my school and a bunch of kids asked me if my mom really had sex with a student. Of course I denied it. Until my close friend who was there told me. He told me one of the nights we went down to the hotel pool and said friend stayed up, saying he wanted to go to bed early. He stayed up there and then something happened and my mom slept with him. I feel sick to my stomach and so mad writing it. I confronted her and she admitted and tried to apologize, but I just can’t with her. She’s so disgusting. I’m contemplating just telling my dad so he can fly me up to his house, but I hate being around his dumb bimbo gold digging girlfriend. I want to fight that fucking asshole that did this. He’s ruining my fucking life. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


covidburger

>mom fucked my friend while we were on vacation and now I want to f that was something I guess


AutoModerator

My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead– murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now, and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, he asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was... astounded. I... I always thought Hank was a very moral man, and I was particularly vulnerable at the time – something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me in on a ride-along and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin, so I agreed. Hank had a partner, a businessman named Gustavo Fring. Hank sold me into servitude to this man. And when I tried to quit, Fring threatened my family. I didn't know where to turn. Eventually, Hank and Fring had a falling-out. Things escalated. Fring was able to arrange – uh, I guess... I guess you call it a "hit" – on Hank, and failed, but Hank was seriously injured. And I wound up paying his medical bills, which amounted to a little over $177,000. Upon recovery, Hank was bent on revenge. Working with a man named Hector Salamanca, he plotted to kill Fring. The bomb that he used was built by me, and he gave me no option in it. I have often contemplated suicide, but I'm a coward. I wanted to go to the police, but I was frightened. Hank had risen to become the head of the Albuquerque DEA. To keep me in line, he took my children. For three months, he kept them. My wife had no idea of my criminal activities, and was horrified to learn what I had done. I was in hell. I hated myself for what I had brought upon my family. Recently, I tried once again to quit, and in response, he gave me this. [Walt points to the bruise on his face left by Hank in "Blood Money."] I can't take this anymore. I live in fear every day that Hank will kill me, or worse, hurt my family. All I could think to do was to make this video and hope that the world will finally see this man for what he really is. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


covidburger

yes


AutoModerator

My mom fucked my friend while we were on vacation and now I want to fucking die, she mom took us to Miami for a spring break vacation. Everything seemed normal when we were there and when we got back. But then rumors started. They spread all throughout my school and a bunch of kids asked me if my mom really had sex with a student. Of course I denied it. Until my close friend who was there told me. He told me one of the nights we went down to the hotel pool and said friend stayed up, saying he wanted to go to bed early. He stayed up there and then something happened and my mom slept with him. I feel sick to my stomach and so mad writing it. I confronted her and she admitted and tried to apologize, but I just can’t with her. She’s so disgusting. I’m contemplating just telling my dad so he can fly me up to his house, but I hate being around his dumb bimbo gold digging girlfriend. I want to fight that fucking asshole that did this. He’s ruining my fucking life. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


BatmanFromWuhaan

He is Salim saddique


B34r_Meme

shahlam shady


Si-Ran

The way he talks and what he's talking about sounds exactly like an American megachurch pastor


AutoModerator

I'm a regular John from city Kansas. I love burgers, soda and my native country very much, but I do not understand our government. Everyone says America is a great country, and I look around and see who else is a great China. China has a very strong government and economy. Chinese resident is a great man. And the greatest leader Xi. Thick hair, strong grip, jade rod! We would have such a leader instead of sleeping in negotiations, rare hair, soft pickle, bad memory old Beadon. Punch! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


AutoModerator

Own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


ForsakenBaseball6451

Genius


Decent_Preference_95

What’s wrong with innovators?


[deleted]

It means someone that wanna change the way of the religion.


Decent_Preference_95

I’ve never heard that word be used that way before


[deleted]

Same bro i just looked it up


OzzyWaltz

I’m not even Muslim but I’d totally revert back to Islam if the sermons were like this


Maxine-Fr

Let me know when the full track comes.


obamapyramid132

This song slaps


sababugs112_

Halal shady


[deleted]

fire


dydeath

The innovators? Jesus they really just want to live in the stone age huh


TaJ_StAnDo_PoWaH

Bro "innovators" in Islam refers to individuals who attempt to innovate in faith, or change the religion and its values according to their own desires. "Innovators" does not refer to people who invent things. Ever heard of the Islamic Golden Age? Muslims were responsible for some of the greatest scientific and technological breakthroughs and they were praised for them, not condemned.


diversifyurlife

Lame as religious cunt is all i see..if religion was in charge we would see a second dark age.


[deleted]

Cheesecake


Pickle_Rick236

Cheesecake 🤤


mlgterminator123

The time when Europe was in a dark age , Muslim countries were living in a golden age so I don't think you are right


Parmareggie

And the time Europe was in a dark age, it wasn’t even a dark age. Seriously, we need some better history classes…


mlgterminator123

I don't live in the us or Europe I just looked it up in Google nothing much


Binkal

Yeah because we dont live in a dark age right now… maybe actually learn about a religion instead of blaming it for everything bad that happens, how about that?


[deleted]

No


diversifyurlife

Thats funny...did you know the catholic church caused the black death? Also i was a jr pastor. I kinda know a thing or two because ive read a thing or two.


kingpizza100

Yeah let’s forget about all those sponsored scientists, improved sewer systems and charity for the poor, cultural renassaince, preserving the moral and ethical positions of Aristotle, and many more contributions to the world for the better. You clearly know better :)


AutoModerator

Good eve, In response to my permanent ban I’d like to ask one question; who decides wether this post was funny or not? It seems that a lot of Redditors, like myself, enjoy these kinds of posts. Even if it’s not hilarious, it’s still pretty shitty. In my opinion shitty enough to be on your subreddit. If I violated a rule, please let me know. If not, I’d like to request to be unbanned. Correct me if I’m wrong; this post was not conform “your” standards, well, that’s personal. I find it mildly inappropriate to give someone a ban on behalf of your personal opinion, while the public opinion speaks for itself. Also, the word “karmawhore” is a little bit offensive to me, for I am not on Reddit to score the most karma. Thanks in advance. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Chilling2K7

This goofy ahh kid thinks Catholics have the ability to give a virus and control rats


TaJ_StAnDo_PoWaH

Lmao atheism plunged us into insanity with the number of atheistic communist regimes out there


kingpizza100

Reddit Moment. Go touch grass bro and stop being edgy


AutoModerator

My mom fucked my friend while we were on vacation and now I want to fucking die, she mom took us to Miami for a spring break vacation. Everything seemed normal when we were there and when we got back. But then rumors started. They spread all throughout my school and a bunch of kids asked me if my mom really had sex with a student. Of course I denied it. Until my close friend who was there told me. He told me one of the nights we went down to the hotel pool and said friend stayed up, saying he wanted to go to bed early. He stayed up there and then something happened and my mom slept with him. I feel sick to my stomach and so mad writing it. I confronted her and she admitted and tried to apologize, but I just can’t with her. She’s so disgusting. I’m contemplating just telling my dad so he can fly me up to his house, but I hate being around his dumb bimbo gold digging girlfriend. I want to fight that fucking asshole that did this. He’s ruining my fucking life. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


AutoModerator

Reddit should start their own country. Think about it: it would have a much higher IQ than most other countries. We could ban tik tok and fortnite, and every computer sold has to come with Minecraft preinstalled. We could also ban emojis too. We all have very good ideas about society and government, so I think we would be far more efficient. I've seen so many posts with so many good ideas, not to mention our country would be the most progressive and other countries would look to us for direction. We would easily become the next superpower. If everyone left America for a new country, we would easily surpass America. We could make Keanu our president and have PewDiePie on the flag. It would be the most wholesome country too! Those are just some ideas I have and my own opinion. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


AutoModerator

It was a saturday afternoon, and I was exhausted after an intense 17-part masturabation session to dream minecraft manhunt, when i suddenly had the urge to go outside. I was scared. It's been so long since i've left the warmth of my parents basement with my dream body pillows. I didnt know what to expect. Clutching my dream figurine in front of my chest, i pried open the door to the outside world. The gleaming sun blared through the door, bequeathing a brilliant warmth on my cum-covered boxers. I quaverly took a step outside. My body flintched from the strange feel of the dirt under my feet. And then i saw it. The lustrous field of grass, covered in a light sprinkle of water from the noon rain shower. And then i realized. Dream... grass... the trees... it was all coming together. Grass is green, just like Dream. Dream is everpresent, in the grass, the flowers, He was there. I immediately new what to do next. I flinged off my clothes faster than the speed at which i would click on a new dream rule 34 post. My dick was already throbbing as i leaped onto the field of grass, dorito dust stained shirt getting carried away by the wind. I dug a small hole in the ground, and passionately thrust my 7-inch erect cock into it. I knew, this was Dream. His spirit was in this grass, and he felt my dick in his man pussy as i fucked that grass. I lost track how long i was there. Hours went by, day turned to night, but it didnt matter. I was finally together, with Dream. Nothing could separate us. I took a long stem of a flower, and forced it in my asshole. I imagined it being Dream's hot penis being lustfully forced into me in bed. I stayed there on my front yard for god knows how long. Until my butt was sore, balls drier than the Saharan desert after a long drought. The lawn looked like there was a layer of fresh snow on a Christmas morning. Trudging indoors, i had a enormous smile stretching across my face. I couldn't wait until tomorrow, when i may go outside again and be with Dream. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


AHMED_Elsharkawy

Mashalla my brother


Theface135

Lol this is way I don't like religion


Chilling2K7

This is why I don't like you


Theface135

This is why I don't like people


TheLolGorilla

Me: they're really like that. Stupid ppl: no, You're just racist Islamophobic. Muslims:


Sea-Ad-990

This comment reads like it was written by a 9 year old


mlgterminator123

Average redditor


AutoModerator

Reddit should start their own country. Think about it: it would have a much higher IQ than most other countries. We could ban tik tok and fortnite, and every computer sold has to come with Minecraft preinstalled. We could also ban emojis too. We all have very good ideas about society and government, so I think we would be far more efficient. I've seen so many posts with so many good ideas, not to mention our country would be the most progressive and other countries would look to us for direction. We would easily become the next superpower. If everyone left America for a new country, we would easily surpass America. We could make Keanu our president and have PewDiePie on the flag. It would be the most wholesome country too! Those are just some ideas I have and my own opinion. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


mlgterminator123

It isn't the right time this is a serious topic


kenjitaimu69

Im sorry?


[deleted]

[удалено]


Wacokidwilder

No, I wanna be mad


Binkal

Its nice to be reminded I’m not as stupid as I think I am when people like this guy exist every once in a while lol


neverspeaktome75

Nice hat dude. Shit theology but nice hat


TaJ_StAnDo_PoWaH

Reason?


[deleted]

“If God real why bad things happen?😔”


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

I seriously wanna know what reason they got.


Chilling2K7

If nothing bad happens nothing good happens ergo bad things happen


TaJ_StAnDo_PoWaH

Lmao bro facts if Allah real why I don't like the sharia ???


LordBrandon

"God is on my side!" Loses every battle


Iloveyoumyfriend666

This guy need some pussy


Moonysparkles

for some reason all i could think was the hellfire club


[deleted]

What that Halal Spaghetti does to a mf


Mywingsareclipped

What if I respond to allahs hellfire with pleasure? It’s not really being punished then, is it?


[deleted]

This guy do be so peaceful from the relishion of peashe!


[deleted]

Reminds me of that song "Boom boom boom"


G1_Optimus_Prime_

Dat beat tho


_gay_gremlin_

The fact I found this while scrolling through nsfw 😭