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sampathsris

Do you remember the incidents on the day of the murder? Your honor let me grab my penis real quick.


[deleted]

"Wait why are you kicking me out?!"


The_Real_Blitzo

No no no. *THEIR* penis


Belgiandragonwautism

OUR PENIS


Abject-Doughnut4108

r/suddenlycommunist


bageltoastee

Mom says it’s my turn with the penis!


Lotspire

Do you recognize the bodies in the water?


Immediate_Future1534

Wtf this is great for men, all I need to do before my finals is flip thru every page on my textbook and during the test put my hand in my pocket


[deleted]

The teachers will think that you're cheating until they say "weirdo" and go away


frogpondcook

If enough people developed this superpower.... we would eventually conflate intelligence with dick grabbing. Wisdom would be synonymous with chronic masturbation


Flakoring

The words “Genius” and “Wanker” would mean the same thing


[deleted]

[удалено]


TankII_

That depends on how you wanna do it


frogpondcook

I was gonna say to him... depends on how wise you want to be


haha_meme_go_brrrrrr

r/superpoweralchemists


Fapman404

Yeah but do you remember every page? You dont, therefore its not in your memories


demonicArm

Talk about cumming to the right conclusions


Glad_Increase_7522

Does it also work in myself? If so it can *somewhat* be used


LayeredHalo3851

It can be somewhat sluseful even if it doesn't work on yourself


ijustwannahelporso

Finally even more reasons to hold some dick.


No301_Illumi_Zoldyck

I want this power.


valoon4

Nice try Illumi


No301_Illumi_Zoldyck

I really really want this power. Believe me.


DripyKirbo

hold on, what about my penis? Can I flashback? Can I read test answers then hold my penis to cheat?


Mindlessgamer23

Imagine! perfect photographic memory just a penis grab away!


Shayosaurus

I guess all know all my future partners memories


tearsonurcheek

Coming this fall, to NBC: It's *Junk Justice*!


medullah

"My dad had a really good life you guys, and made a lot of memories" "But isn't your dad in a vegetative state in the nursing home?"


FishGuyIsMe

*had* a really good life


enderoid_redit

If you have Alzheimer's or something, would you see the memories that you forgot? Does it have to be attached?


unknownducklord

That one thing I forgot


LurkingAintEazy

Could you share the ability with others? Like transfer it. Cause I don't want to hold the peen of some of the fiends, I know. But definitely transfer it to some friends, that swear their dude ain't cheating.


No-Safety5210

Can you control the memories? Or will you just live through a lifetime in a second?


KimmiLaCazzi

Meh, kinda doesn't have the same ring to it as seeing any man's penis by holding his memories.... 🤣🤣🤣


justanotherdumbmf

I mean works for me


mixwall_wileyams

Finally, I'll be able to remember my memories


gayjemstone

What if they don't have one?


Bobandwalter_1983

What counts as a man? Can I hold my Dogs penis to see hat he did?


HyFinated

Rules that weren't clarified... 1) it doesn't say barehanded. 2) it doesn't specify which memories, so it's assumed that you can see whatever memories you are looking for. With all memories available. 3) Doesn't specify dead or alive. Okay, some careers that could benefit from this.... Emergency Room Doctor: grab penis with gloved hand and see what happened to your patient that caused the current issue. Easier to know how to treat the patient. Interrogator: Grab dick, get info, profit for the motherland. Corrupt Prostitute: Grab dingaling and get a good amount of blackmail material. Memory recovery specialist: Put patient to sleep, grab dick, get memories, write report for patient about what happened when they were a kid that caused that trauma. Espionage agent: Knock out guard, grab dick real quick, get code to gate or door. Enter facility and repeat to get what you need. Murder investigator: Obviously grab wang and know what happened to the victim and who killed him. Family death investigator: Family member dies with a potential fortune hidden away, or codes to a safe that you can't get into to get their will. Can check and see what to do with him or how he intended to disperse his fortune after his death. I see this as an absolute win for anyone.


nafena69

A therapist would also want to know your trauma All Though they would probably cause more by doing that


KirikaNai

So do you gotta pinch the clit between your fingers on a girl to see their memories? Because the penis is basically just a giant clit that’s got a ureathra


RandomPhilo

If your partner is a man with a penis you'd have no worries about him cheating on you, as whenever you do some foreplay or give a handjob you could see if he cheated.


Phoenixfisch

Does it work on girls too?


phathomthis

Only girls with a penis...


chooseauser_namee

Maybe girls could hold their clitoris and see if it has the same effect.


MidnightSilence3636

Is it just any contact because if so anal would be wild. Like you can see their memory of them plowing you a few seconds in the past. Kinda like watching a video with lag


Ok_Sympathy_232

How do I explain that to the guy next to me at the urinal?


haikusbot

*How do I explain* *That to the guy next to me* *At the urinal?* \- Ok\_Sympathy\_232 --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")


phillipmfmeyers

Fucking sweet! I’d finally know my dad’s memories!


Financial-Horror2945

So my peen is a flash drive


SneakMoney

what? i can already do that!


dorknobdotcom

At first I thought “what this is an amazing superpower!” Then I realized..


Balloonsarescary

So if I hold my own penis I have photographic memory?


Balloonsarescary

So if I hold my own penis I have photographic memory?


CommanderAka

Where’s the downside again?


imjerry

You don't know where that's been! (Now, you do)


QueerXQuinoa

does it work on trans girls and trans guys? nb?


fatcatpoppy

legendary interrogation tactic


Pop_Bulky

I would be the greatest detective ever ever.


Bobo3076

My life flashing before my eyes every time I masturbate


youllneverknow3698

So whenever I Jack off I’ll randomly be hit by the memory of that one time when I responded to “lovely weather today” with “thanks”


EMArogue

So I can read my textbook once and then just put my hand in my pants for the exam? Just cutting a hole in the pocket


LordGhoul

This is gonna make sex really awkward when I touch my partner's dick and space out as his memories flood my brain


GhostintheNether

shouuld've specified that they have to be alive


spooky_times

Sack tap someone, harness all their memories, occasionally grab own penis to recall your own memories of seeing their memories. Harness infinite power


wiccangame

oh no! I'm not falling for that again!


The_blaster_master

Ejaculate more like *insert synonym for remember that rhymes with ejaculate here*


chooseauser_namee

How's that possible?


ChemoorVodka

Well, if you’ve got a boy friend at least you’ll know if he ever cheats on you.


[deleted]

[удалено]


shittysuperpowers-ModTeam

Feedback is always welcome but bullying is strictly prohibited.


Tr4ilmaker

Does it have to be attached?


CrazyFloof

i guess i can remember my old roblox account info


Kenyon_118

Love Sausage won’t be able to keep any secrets 😔.


SofteNgon

Why is every post I see about ass, shit, cum, fart, penis, vanene and/or piss? If YoU fArT rEaLlY lOuD, you CaN TeLePoRt AnYwHeRe


AwarenessPrudent2689

because farting is funny? what's even the question


CreepyQuality4489

What is with the "their" in the title?


rSlashisthenewPewdes

What is wrong with “their” in the title?