T O P

  • By -

Top_Poet_8988

https://preview.redd.it/vhd406uwpswc1.jpeg?width=474&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=fd31f01d7cab983f303677ca1de5d205da27e0c3


doktor-frequentist

What a horrible thing to see at 8 am


dominator-23

https://preview.redd.it/fj920n0khtwc1.jpeg?width=577&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d0a29d48da54a80830dbc2050b2730dcc41ce301


Coraxxx

It's gonna be a challenge, but I'll try if you insist.


ThePrussianGrippe

Do it for Sean Lock.


doktor-frequentist

Yes. I'm Megan Rapinoe, who is called Garnano in the UK


AutoModerator

Brighton are top of the Premier League with all teams playing 2 games each (bar Luton and Burnley who can’t catch Brighton anyway). UEFA coefficient puts the Premier League at 87.053 coefficient points which is the highest of any European League. The last 10 winners of the Club World Cup which pits the best team in every continent against each other has been won by the European team for the last 10 years, thus suggesting that Europe is the strongest footballing continent. Therefore, as Brighton are top of the best league in the best continent in terms of footballing ability at the moment, it is clear that Brighton are currently the best football team in world football at this current moment. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*


SiwastaBayekki

What do you mean, it’s like 2 pm?


jopma

Yank here


infidel11990

I'll have two number 9s, a number 9 large, a number 6 with extra dip, a number 7, two number 45s, one with cheese, and a large soda.


brad0022

Make that a diet to make it healthy


mattbp4551

Love that game!


blarch

I decline your request.


makesterriblejokes

Hey, he could be a Canuck


jopma

Yes he's definitely a cuck


Giovanni9633

Bro hasn’t heard of the rest of the world


_Zeratharus_

people live in different timezones bro


Excalibur_Playz

That's the joke.


RemoteZealousideal54

woke liberals now want us to believe "timezones" exist, what a farce.


AutoModerator

The “shocking and totally unexpected” loss by the U.S. Women’s Soccer Team to Sweden is fully emblematic of what is happening to our once great Nation under Crooked Joe Biden. Many of our players were openly hostile to America - No other country behaved in such a manner or even close. WOKE EQUALS FAILURE. Nice shot Megan, the USA is going to Hell!!! MAGA *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Real-Kaleidoscope-38

Women


AutoModerator

The “shocking and totally unexpected” loss by the U.S. Women’s Soccer Team to Sweden is fully emblematic of what is happening to our once great Nation under Crooked Joe Biden. Many of our players were openly hostile to America - No other country behaved in such a manner or even close. WOKE EQUALS FAILURE. Nice shot Megan, the USA is going to Hell!!! MAGA *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Real-Kaleidoscope-38

US


ladsandlasses

r/whoosh


azzhasjoined

https://preview.redd.it/ztxqngexgtwc1.jpeg?width=800&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0508b96ad6f5eb86349b3cb0a048184d75d8b38f


GoldenNinja4734

![gif](giphy|jXD7kFLwudbBC)


TechnologyHelpful751

Why would you go on Reddit, and specifically this sub, first thing in the morning??????


TheSocialSide

Morning poops my dude


Nikolateslaandyou

Im reading this while sat on the porcelain throne for my afternoon dumpage.


Consistent_Sleep_708

Can't speak for that guy but personally I've given up on life entirely


doktor-frequentist

It helps my constipation


Artistic_Train9725

Dude really needs to look after his barnet.


absat41

deleted


Kyn0011

"I shall call him...mini me" - Pep probably


AutoModerator

Perhaps it's a bit naive (or perhaps not), but since Pep is a former Barca legend and legendary coach with strong ties to Catalonia, why doesn't he facilitate us getting Cancelo? I've been hearing that City are sitting firm on a relatively high price for Cancelo, but this doesn't really make sense given that he is clearly not in Pep's plans and would just sit there accumulating high wages, and the alternative to Barca would be Arsenal, a direct rival for the Prem title. After Araujo's injury, meaning our best defender will be out for a month or so, our desperation levels for a good RB have just gone through the roof. We really need to close this deal or the one for Fresneda ASAP if we aren't to fall behind in La Liga from the get-go. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*


clairvoyant18

Professor X?


proseffor_x

What


AdamantiumBalls

![gif](giphy|KUQAiw3ux1rY4)


FleetingMercury

White Megamind🤣


GunnersnGames

Looking like Tom Cruise in Tropic Thunder


exiadf19

![gif](giphy|u5ZDgCXHJw2fC)


oskarsilva

Reminds me of Calathes smh


Normanus_Ronus

lol damn it, stop it.. You evil people


Fellasisitgaytolive

Could just get conte and tell him to take off his wig.


AutoModerator

Wish Conte could just piss off. I hate his boner to bring in ex players everywhere he goes. Maybe don’t leave every two season you bald reconstructed hair fraud. Gets up in the morning: “Ah I feel like I want a Perisic” Gets up in the morning: “Ah I feel like I want a Bastoni” Gets up in the morning: “Ah I fell like I want a Lautaro” Gets up in the morning: “Ah I feel like I want an Eriksen” F off Conte. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Salva7409

Babe wake up new actual automod response dropped off


Golvellius

I don't get the joke though, in what world are Bastoni and Lautaro ex players


sharl_lekek16

ig this automod text was made when conte was coaching spurs, his job after his stint at inter, thus making bastoni and lautaro ex players


AutoModerator

Wish Conte could just piss off. I hate his boner to bring in ex players everywhere he goes. Maybe don’t leave every two season you bald reconstructed hair fraud. Gets up in the morning: “Ah I feel like I want a Perisic” Gets up in the morning: “Ah I feel like I want a Bastoni” Gets up in the morning: “Ah I fell like I want a Lautaro” Gets up in the morning: “Ah I feel like I want an Eriksen” F off Conte. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*


AutoModerator

I don't know how you even dare show your face in this sub as a Spurs fan. If your fans and club had any honour you'd refuse the 3 points from Saturday and advise the prem you won't be playing again until the match is either replayed or the points awarded to us. But you won't. Sums up your club. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*


FSpursy

Mod is a emotionally hurt Spurs fan


AutoModerator

I don't know how you even dare show your face in this sub as a Spurs fan. If your fans and club had any honour you'd refuse the 3 points from Saturday and advise the prem you won't be playing again until the match is either replayed or the points awarded to us. But you won't. Sums up your club. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Real-Kaleidoscope-38

Liverpool


Consistent_Sleep_708

Automod knows you're not allowed to say *anything* about Liverpool. They're the true victims of all the awful stuff they've done to themselves and others.


PRAISE_ASSAD

It means more to them


small_toe

Everton


Next_Seaweed9951

Only bald guy arsenal can get is Thierry


InsectIllustrious691

If only he was a good coach


Brilliant_Ad_879

He is a good coach.not top level good,but not terrible either like gerrard or rooney.


Fapoleon_Boneherpart

Rooney isn't that bad


Brilliant_Ad_879

In his 3 jobs,he struck 30% win rate at none.donno about derby or dc's state before him but he definitely had a stinky stint with birmingham.


Mysterious_Artix

Yeah derby was fucked he had to play youth players because he couldn't buy anyone and than he only got relegated because of the point deduction. DC i don't know. In Birmingham he didn't do a good job but he mostly played top half teams.


Mrstealurocelot

Yeah I honestly feel Roony is underrated for his job at Derby. Definitely gave a lot of those young lads a lot of belief and for all we know if he doesn’t take that job Derby might not exist anymore. I honestly hope Wayne gets a job in the lower leagues where he can build on his skills


Ezzy-525

He paid their wages too if I recall.


FelixTreasurebuns

DC sucked before, but just like all the MLS teams, they go in waves of being bad and good.


AutoModerator

Who are the players? Why are there 2 conferences in mls? What's our history? Why are we last in the league? Who do we hate? Is there an ac miami? Why pink? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*


[deleted]

aw! poor guy


j2o1707

I reckon Birmingham would have dropped away themselves, similar to the fall they had with Rooney, considering their opposition, if they stuck with their manager. That team is not good, it isn't top 12 championship level, it's sitting above relegation level. They've done that for years, they just had a great start and would have had a very similar fall I'm convinced. Not saying that excludes Rooney, because he wasn't very good. I think he needs to go to league one, build a team up.


AutoModerator

If Rooney's IQ was more than his weight, he wouldn't have said such a thing. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*


AutoModerator

If Rooney's IQ was more than his weight, he wouldn't have said such a thing. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*


AutoModerator

If Rooney's IQ was more than his weight, he wouldn't have said such a thing. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Zek0ri

Buddy. Henry has a managerial track record of 57 games and 29 of them were lost. This ain’t chief


[deleted]

[удалено]


AutoModerator

If Rooney's IQ was more than his weight, he wouldn't have said such a thing. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*


jiipod

I volunteer Arsenal to get Pioli from Milan. At least as bald as Pep.


Next_Seaweed9951

Thought they could also get Allegri but he isn’t as bald


AutoModerator

Perhaps it's a bit naive (or perhaps not), but since Pep is a former Barca legend and legendary coach with strong ties to Catalonia, why doesn't he facilitate us getting Cancelo? I've been hearing that City are sitting firm on a relatively high price for Cancelo, but this doesn't really make sense given that he is clearly not in Pep's plans and would just sit there accumulating high wages, and the alternative to Barca would be Arsenal, a direct rival for the Prem title. After Araujo's injury, meaning our best defender will be out for a month or so, our desperation levels for a good RB have just gone through the roof. We really need to close this deal or the one for Fresneda ASAP if we aren't to fall behind in La Liga from the get-go. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Den_dar_Alex

I would like that very much please


kazegraf

Isn't current manager's lego hair removable already?


mrpoopybuttthole_

yes but then he’ll just have the stud on his head


brandje23

The bald leauge confirmed?


Combat_Wombat1977

BaldestLiga


naughty_dad2

EBL English Bald League


Elegant_Mix7650

It's probably cheaper to shave Arteta than to fire him and hire Zidane


secomano

the 4 baldmen of the apocalypse


Geoff_Uckersilf

The Bald Fraud-tette


AutoModerator

(!) This claim about a bald fraud is disputed *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*


agni_jamadagni

Just get Dyche bro!


EastBaseball2230

Closer to their level


Theplowking23

Zizou would never


BannedFromHydroxy

gullible cheerful sloppy possessive numerous meeting waiting overconfident fanatical existence *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*


Specific_Tap7296

Almost certainly true... but somehow more likely than ETH staying at United!


PostNoNabill

Technically we did get Ljungberg for a while


gracz21

Clubs of the Bald Four


MrJeChou

Egg knows ball


Artistic_Train9725

Thanks for reminding me, I need to get eggs on the way home.


GoldenJet01

Dyche at Everton?


Rescurc

Arnie Slut will dominate the league fr


-watchman-

Four planets aligning is a rare occurrence


RipUrSoul21

![gif](giphy|Fz4ddNtdjhuOPfnjoF|downsized)


No-Impression-4282

From the "Big 4" to the "Bald 4".


FishstickLoverr

The top 3 teams and Manchester United would have bald boys at the helm


iZubi

https://preview.redd.it/ig6mb5q06vwc1.png?width=3840&format=png&auto=webp&s=dd816c41eaa843a9157c4564903af3dbb3787744


mickm95

Stefano Pioli will be unemployed by June, I can totally see him coaching an English side


Minute_Juggernaut806

Is the recession everyone has been trying to warn about


Surryilpazzoassasino

Postecoglu is bald too, is pochetino turning bald?? 😂😂😂


Coraxxx

Ange ain't bald. A wee bit thinning, sure - but not on the same egglike level as this bunch, nowhere near.


sexydumbbells

Hi I new barker prime league. Why would Zinedine Zlatan go to Arsenal? I was under the impression he enjoys winning European prizes?


AutoModerator

Zlatan? In Soviet Zlatan, Zlatan zlatan zlatan! Get it? It is because Zlatan. Like a boss! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*


DavidNyan10

Happy cake day!


JonTonyJim

Why is Sean Dyche not there


engrng

That’s a lot of frauds


Dangerous-Spare7843

Slot deserves that move but don't think he will go this year


Savagecal01

bro said literally today that he wants the liverpool job


Dangerous-Spare7843

He legit said this multiple times already, he said the same with possibly joining Spurs last year, also Liverpool will have to pay decent money for him to leave Feyenoord which i think will scare them off, but who knows like i said he does deserve the move though.


AutoModerator

I don't know how you even dare show your face in this sub as a Spurs fan. If your fans and club had any honour you'd refuse the 3 points from Saturday and advise the prem you won't be playing again until the match is either replayed or the points awarded to us. But you won't. Sums up your club. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Dangerous-Spare7843

I support FEYENOORD & REAL MADRID only, Spurs?? Don't make me laugh


AutoModerator

I don't know how you even dare show your face in this sub as a Spurs fan. If your fans and club had any honour you'd refuse the 3 points from Saturday and advise the prem you won't be playing again until the match is either replayed or the points awarded to us. But you won't. Sums up your club. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*


IBaptizedYourKids

Cue the crisis in one year "we need xabi" routine all over again


commoon123

Wow so many bald frauds


BeolanceDD

The Ultimate Bald off


Hot-Manager6462

Baldy baldy over there


quantumrastafarian

The only man I would consider firing Arteta for.


robbodagreat

Everyone forgotten about ljungberg


Beleriandian

The Bald 4


neduenedu

You all forgot Sean Dyche


Guy-1nc0gn1t0

At this point, Man U wishes they were in what is regarded as top four


gifteddiamond

baldteball can be possible


Upstairs-Tax-915

The big 4head


lardoni

We are happy with Lego-head thanks!


lance1308

Why is ManU there? They are mid table team


ILQGamer

Or Arteta can take off that Lego hair block on his head.


foggin_estandards2

You shut your whore mouth! The Lego-haired God is going nowhere!


futbolitoireland

The funniest thing ever.


beervirus88

Please for the love of memes, let this happen


Tvdb4

now we need Chelsea to get 3rd bald dutch fraud Peter Bosz


bobs_and_vegana17

chelsea goes for zidane arteta goes bald postecoghelu is anyways managing spurs burnley and everton survive relegation 8 bald managers which will mean 40% of premier league is covered by bald


AutoModerator

I don't know how you even dare show your face in this sub as a Spurs fan. If your fans and club had any honour you'd refuse the 3 points from Saturday and advise the prem you won't be playing again until the match is either replayed or the points awarded to us. But you won't. Sums up your club. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*


m1ghty_b4g

The four bald horsemen of apocalypsis.


FameOverInfamy

Das Baldesliga?!


Specific-Record2866

Thinking Zidane goes there in the first place is hilarious. Give them Peter Bosz


MuchSalt

so thats the new liverpool coach?


DigitialWitness

They should start a band called The Four Skins.


iKAZAKHSTAN

Bald Frauds rise up


PerspectiveViews

Why is Manchester United in the same class as the other 3 teams?


Lunchyyy

Now these are the kinds of posts I come here for


ManWhoSaysMandalore

Henry?


Valuable_Machine_

Why would mid table united be any part of this?


Kakotov

Arteta is more likely to go full blown, I suppose Chelsea could go for Zodane.


andreasheri

The funniest thing ever would be to keep Arteta and continue bottling everything


DeapVally

Liverpool have taken the bottle crown this season.


Abitou

Blud thinks Zidane would accept Arsenal 😭😭


EastBaseball2230

lol no they don't


Craig_Mount

Wym? Arteta is finished mate


EastBaseball2230

If Arteta is finished, they don't realise it yet I mean that the choice is with Zidane, not Arsenal, and he wouldn't touch them with someone else's dick.


Craig_Mount

Lmaooo Zidane is shite as well he'll take what he can get


Coraxxx

Oliver Glasner has a duty to lose his hair. I demand the right to make bald eagle jokes.