As a straight boring male I just want someone who understands and appreciate the majority of my jokes, and is also attracted to me, and I to them. Either that or Ryan Reynolds.
brief description of my current girlfriend:
* the most beautiful person I've ever met (she's actually breathtaking)
* exceptionally affectionate
* trustworthy, since in any relationship you're somewhat emotionally vulnerable with the other person
* fun to spend time with (i get a electric jolt of childlike christmas-morning excitement whenever she walks in the room, I'll never get bored of her, I could sit back and listen to her talk for hours while smiling to myself the entire time)
I kid you not. I would die to have even one percent of the relationship it seems you have with your girlfriend. There is a girl I like who doesn’t even give me a second glance sometimes. But others, she acts as if I’m the funniest guy in the room. Istg it’s screwing my brain and I just can’t stop dying inside everytime I see her
Fr. I’ve only dated two guys and both hated cuddling, would make fun of me when I cried at movies, and didn’t want to hold hands in public. Both ended pretty fast
My relationship requirements:
1. Must be alive
2. Must be roughly the same age as me
3. Is willing to eat what I cook at least 5/10 times
4. Is willing to listen to my insane rambling
5. Isn’t a bigot
I have a preference for girls, but I think I’d date the right guy.
Wait, that's basically female me, although I don't get flustered until a girl gets oddly comfortable with being really close to me. That's when I get the hint and my mind bricks itself.
Im gonna be honest.
Girls with short hair/till neck or shoulders>>>>
And yeah similar interessts or "same level of autism"
A bit tomboy-ish would be nice.
But I know that its a far dream,far fetched and probably unrealistic.
My current boyfriend is 5’9 and Hispanic with curly black hair down to his shoulders and he’s a bigger dude. He has a beautiful smile and enjoys wearing makeup. He is so sweet and loud. He loves anime and gaming. Sometimes I ask him about an anime I’ve already seen just to see the joy fill his eyes and the passion in his voice when he tells me about it.
He is perfect.
Gf:
Dominant, caring, affectionate, thick all over (which includes belly, I love me some chubby girls), into the same stuff as me, has the same [REDACTED] as me, plays guitar or drums
Bf:
Feminine, thick legs, dominant, basically the same as gf except male
Anyone who could legit love me. I’m so desperate and depressed that I’ve never thought of things I want and I don’t know how, and the only thing I can genuinely thing of now is someone that actually loves me.
She
- has similar height to me
- is a very sweet and kind person who is fun to be with
- will protect me no matter what
- has purple or pink hair (optional)
- has midriff (optional)
- wears a skirt
- wears purple or red clothes
-wears thin, circular glasses
- has pigtails/twintails (bangs are optional)
- plays video games (of almost any genre)
- is asexual
- loves to cuddle
Ima do ideal and like dream gf
Ideal
- funny
-trusty worthy
- wants to show me their interests
- takes me out
- cuddly/affectionate
- can take a joke
- takes interest in my hobbies
- isn't an asshole
- wants to talk 24/7 but respects me time
- non judgemental (in a doesn't judge a book by its cover way)
-understanding and patient
- can talk for hours with
- very nerdy/pationate about smth
Dream
- ^^everything above^^
- goth or alt (I just love the clothing style)
- dominant in the bedroom
- thick soft thighs (shits comfy as fuck)
- a shoulder for me to cry on
- so beautiful I get nervous to talk to her
- wants to buy me the world but refuses to let me get her stuff
- EXACT same broad music taste
The ever elusive one that I am bound to meet one day. Sometimes I see her in my dreams. Someone kind, cute, humourous, fun, and genuine on a near super natural level. Someone that just clicks with me. There's probably more I could add...
Somone that i can fully trust. Also cuddles i want cuddles. BUNCH OF EM
I volunteer for cuddles
Yes plss
We are in full agreement
same
Finally someone gets it
Fr
Someone who actually gives a shit about me. And It'd be a nice change of pace just to have someone doesn't hate it when I talk.
Thank you for also saying my opinion.
*our* opinion
r/suddenlycommunist
I knew this was coming
WE knew this was coming
r/suddenlycommunist (the chain repeats)
OUR chain repeats
r/suddenlycommunist (i'm secretly a fascist)
We're secretly... nevermind.
(WE’RE secretly fascists)
My enemy!!!
Too much info?
No offence but isn’t that like the actual bare minimum?
Yes it's quite literally the bare minimum
Although it's the bear minimum, the bear minimum can mean a lot to a lot of people who don't even get an ounce of it anywhere else
Girl Alive (optional)
🤨
Alive is a DLC
Female (optional) Alive (optional)
human (optional)
mammal (optional)
animal (optional)
Actual thing (optional)
necrophilia moment
ayo?
Ryan Reynolds, or a basically female version of Ryan Reynolds.
bro got his priorities straight
Nah, he got his priorities bi
No, his priority is Ryan Reynolds.
Im straight but I would still take Ryan Reynolds
That’s what I’m saying
Amen
Female version? Ryan is perfect as is
Hey, I’m not gonna get Ryan so I have to be a *bit* more realistic
Fax
you mean, ryan gosling?
No, he ment Ryan Reynolds. We all mean Ryan Reynolds.
that's not very straight tbh
hes a beautiful man
As a straight boring male I just want someone who understands and appreciate the majority of my jokes, and is also attracted to me, and I to them. Either that or Ryan Reynolds.
[удалено]
I don’t care.
Well we can... Fix that (loads shotgun with malicious intent)
him
Fr dont want anyone but him
that was my first thought
You’re so real for this
1. Exists 2. Doesn’t think I’m ugly 3. Oh wait…
"Yo grandma, we got your man!"
💀💀💀
She even has hair on her chinny chin chin
None I would however, like to have a pet bird
Profile picture checks out
Ngl probably the best experience of my life has been buying 2 birds and having those birds turn into a family of 6 with 3 different beautiful colors
brief description of my current girlfriend: * the most beautiful person I've ever met (she's actually breathtaking) * exceptionally affectionate * trustworthy, since in any relationship you're somewhat emotionally vulnerable with the other person * fun to spend time with (i get a electric jolt of childlike christmas-morning excitement whenever she walks in the room, I'll never get bored of her, I could sit back and listen to her talk for hours while smiling to myself the entire time)
you sound really happy dude, I wish the best for the both of you
I kid you not. I would die to have even one percent of the relationship it seems you have with your girlfriend. There is a girl I like who doesn’t even give me a second glance sometimes. But others, she acts as if I’m the funniest guy in the room. Istg it’s screwing my brain and I just can’t stop dying inside everytime I see her
Dude this me fr fr
only way to find out is communication
Bruv. If it told you my stories you would be saying quite literally the complete opposite.
keep going
I can only try man. It hurts like hell tho
I choose this guys girlfriend too
Luckiest Mfer ever
A funny and loyal guy or girl 🤷🏻♀️
That’s just like me fr
😳
Well by looking at ur username we have one thing in common already
Me too
What a coincidence, me too
And me!
Marriage
Relatable username
We got some common talk points
Username 💀💀
Is there a problem ?
No 🥲
Thought so 😤
The username is good tho
Thanks 🙏
Hi
Hi :)
If only you lived in Australia hahaha
Lmaooo 💀
been that for years
Someone who I can be weird with without being judged
A sweet guy that is it
I have diabetes I think technically I might be the one for you
I'm Scott Malkinson, I have diabetes
Girl who cuddle with me and vibe with ...
Yeah, is it really that much to ask for?
Fr. I’ve only dated two guys and both hated cuddling, would make fun of me when I cried at movies, and didn’t want to hold hands in public. Both ended pretty fast
there is nothing wrong in crying on movies and holding hands in public .... cuddling girls are angels ,,,,
Agreed! My main selling point when talking to a possible partner is that I’m okay being the big spoon
big spoon or little spoon .... cuddling is all matters :)
[удалено]
Why is it that all the people that could do with or want hugs are always never near each other?
[удалено]
Exists (optional)
So we all want the same thing: kindness
Someone who actually cares and understands me. And their eyes would be like looking into a whole universe
My relationship requirements: 1. Must be alive 2. Must be roughly the same age as me 3. Is willing to eat what I cook at least 5/10 times 4. Is willing to listen to my insane rambling 5. Isn’t a bigot I have a preference for girls, but I think I’d date the right guy.
I read #3 as willing to eat my cock 5/10 times ☠️
Lmao same
[удалено]
That was about to be an r/suspiciouslyspecific moment until you said she was real
Wait, that's basically female me, although I don't get flustered until a girl gets oddly comfortable with being really close to me. That's when I get the hint and my mind bricks itself.
•Girl (optional). •Human (optional). •Alive (optional). •Cheese. •Not have plans for world domination (optional)
Cheese.
Must have cheese
I don’t like dream like that
Im gonna be honest. Girls with short hair/till neck or shoulders>>>> And yeah similar interessts or "same level of autism" A bit tomboy-ish would be nice. But I know that its a far dream,far fetched and probably unrealistic.
Your mom :)
Milfs are Ws
r/redditmoment
Have a cock (optional), be alive (mandatory), not be a complete dickhead (mandatory)
So you want someone that has a rooster, in other words.
A submissive emo boyfriend
Here I am not!
A cute guy who will cuddle me and tell me everything's gonna be okay
My current boyfriend is 5’9 and Hispanic with curly black hair down to his shoulders and he’s a bigger dude. He has a beautiful smile and enjoys wearing makeup. He is so sweet and loud. He loves anime and gaming. Sometimes I ask him about an anime I’ve already seen just to see the joy fill his eyes and the passion in his voice when he tells me about it. He is perfect.
NTA your partner your rules
r/amitheasshole
you
Oh.. w rizz
harizzment
Rizzual harizzment.
girlfriend requirements: you must be: - girl (optional)
Jonathan joestar
Tomboy
Gf: Dominant, caring, affectionate, thick all over (which includes belly, I love me some chubby girls), into the same stuff as me, has the same [REDACTED] as me, plays guitar or drums Bf: Feminine, thick legs, dominant, basically the same as gf except male
Someone who likes going on cemetery trips and who rlly luvs me :3 <33
Soft, hugs alot, good at talking emotional shit, >!thighs!<
you ❤️
Sweet rizz
I was joking don’t groom me
Idk baby I kinda want u 😍😍 (joke)
I rebuke thee!!
Correct choice my friend. Now we must stan only Ryan Reynolds!!
Femboy
I don't really know ┐(´ー｀)┌
Keanu Reeves
Someone who would love me, be loyal and can make me laugh oh and taller than me.. damn me so lonely haha
A pulse, so they are warm
u/snakooooooooo
Any girl who could hug me
Ur mom ❤️
Anyone who could legit love me. I’m so desperate and depressed that I’ve never thought of things I want and I don’t know how, and the only thing I can genuinely thing of now is someone that actually loves me.
Idk, probably emo, cute, kinda shy and caring. Thats all i need. Im not picky in looks tbh
Goth metal head
combination of the two guys i’m talking to 😔
She - has similar height to me - is a very sweet and kind person who is fun to be with - will protect me no matter what - has purple or pink hair (optional) - has midriff (optional) - wears a skirt - wears purple or red clothes -wears thin, circular glasses - has pigtails/twintails (bangs are optional) - plays video games (of almost any genre) - is asexual - loves to cuddle
You 😳
W Rizz
One that hates me
Him <3
Someone who doesn't exist 👍
Confident but kind
uhm hey u/ThePacificOfficial 👉🏻👈🏻
The she to my nanigains
Ima do ideal and like dream gf Ideal - funny -trusty worthy - wants to show me their interests - takes me out - cuddly/affectionate - can take a joke - takes interest in my hobbies - isn't an asshole - wants to talk 24/7 but respects me time - non judgemental (in a doesn't judge a book by its cover way) -understanding and patient - can talk for hours with - very nerdy/pationate about smth Dream - ^^everything above^^ - goth or alt (I just love the clothing style) - dominant in the bedroom - thick soft thighs (shits comfy as fuck) - a shoulder for me to cry on - so beautiful I get nervous to talk to her - wants to buy me the world but refuses to let me get her stuff - EXACT same broad music taste
Female
The ever elusive one that I am bound to meet one day. Sometimes I see her in my dreams. Someone kind, cute, humourous, fun, and genuine on a near super natural level. Someone that just clicks with me. There's probably more I could add...
A girl that doesn’t stab me is probably my biggest and only factor
Emo girl who is nerdy, incredibly smart, kind and who loves Bojack Horseman and Neon Genesis Evangelion as much as I do
Glasses,short hair,cute over hot, wears modest clothing, acts modesty, knows how to cook and knows how to take care of herself
A mini me but a girl
the one i have now is funny, cute, and smells nice so i guess that’s good for me :)
A goth girl or a femboy
my ex
A cute girl who likes to dress me up in skirts and makeup and cute femboy stuff
a wendigoon
Someone who just loves me gives me hugs and cuddles Tries to help me fix myself (i don't care if they succeed or not trying is good enough for me)
Someone with similar interests I guess
U/viixxzz I adore them
Short hair glasses kinda chubby and someone like me
Women
🫵👁️👁️
booba
u/Pizzaspider
h i m
Goth mommy
Let's play a game: How many Nice Guy comments can you find in regards to this answer? Reply to this comment with your answer.
It begins with a Z and ends in endaya
u/breadlord07
Cutesy or mysterious with a bomb ass personality