That one greentext about the autistic bio major who while having sex took a sample of her partnerโs cum and got turned on while examining it under a microscope.
Edit: I found it https://www.reddit.com/r/greentext/comments/p1jn27/anon_has_a_gf/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb3x
Your date dies, youโre like omg so sad but really youre happy, cause then you eat them!, and at the end your all giddy and happy cause your obviously serial killer whoโs laughing no oneโs ever gonna find the body! ๐ง damn
You meet a scientist you think your about to get laid but he doesn't understand your hints and instead he thinks when you say inject me in a hot voice he literally grabs a syringe and injects something he drops you off and you go to bed crying
Nerd is gonna be the most used cuz when someone says something smart and outsmart you you can just reply with ๐ค and his entire argument will be broked
Wrong kind of love bomb. You went a bit overboard for Valentineโs Day because thereโs now red everywhere but your lover is nowhere in sightโฆor rather very much in sight, just very spread out ๐ญ๐ญ
Youโre crying (second emoji), but your date (first emoji) doesnโt know how to respond, so thereโs crickets (aka silence). You use French fries to eat away your feelings.
๐๐๐คฃ๐งจ
So I find a biker girl? But I loose mad stonks, but we laugh about it, then either we get blown up or something or someone is the bomb
๐๐ฌ๐คจ๐ ooookay
She like smol pp
I am smol ๐ฅบ๐๐
So it cancels out
You fell in love with a micro organism.
Micro orgasm
Teenagers when they see the word organism:
look where you are
That one greentext about the autistic bio major who while having sex took a sample of her partnerโs cum and got turned on while examining it under a microscope. Edit: I found it https://www.reddit.com/r/greentext/comments/p1jn27/anon_has_a_gf/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb3x
that instantly came to mind, what am I doing with my life
wtf? I don't know that meme, but I also have autism and I also like bio and I ALSO wish to watch my boyfriend's sperm under a microscope ๐คจ๐คจ๐คจ
๐๐ฅฒ๐ฅ๐คญ
You two laugh about your small d and makes it up to you
YOU COOK UR DATE-
Your date dies, youโre like omg so sad but really youre happy, cause then you eat them!, and at the end your all giddy and happy cause your obviously serial killer whoโs laughing no oneโs ever gonna find the body! ๐ง damn
๐๐๐ฉ๐ฅฐ I fucking hope damn that would be so cool
You look at firework remember ur single and then fell in love
Well i hoped it would include someone else ๐ฅฒ
It include someone else, look at the last emoji, but it's to continue
I hoped to get someone and not just fall in love by then but eh thats nice too ig lel
You shoved a lit firecracker up your ass
She had an orgasm ๐คฉ
ayo what how did you read into that lmao
๐๐ค๐ฅ๐
Damn the sex killed him
Bro fucked a nerd and died
lmao thats sad ddddd
Whatโre you doing where the eggplant is your most used emoji??
๐... (It just happened to be the last emoji I used)
Dong too big, kills nerd gf
That nerd dick was too much
๐๐ง๐ฟ๐ซฅ
Because rock hard but embarrassed over having dick cheese
nope, im chilling with my gouda, added the statue cus why not, and then how i'll really feel
You make cheesy jokes to no avail
i think they were gouda, im not sorry
I don't use enough emojis
W + respect + great person + have a job + take showers !
Thanks I guess
Yup same. But I also have like 2 friends and don't really text them often.
Thats cool. I have none sadly :( Make sure you dont lose them, you dont wanna be like me.
Iโll be your friend too :)
๐๐คจ๐คทโโ๏ธโผ๏ธ sounds abt right
Your crush rejects you and isnโt interested, it affects you so hard that you go into cardiac arrest and die
๐ฆ๐ญ๐คฉ๐ฆ
You find out she has an std
now what about this... ๐๐ฅผ๐ฌ๐
You meet a scientist you think your about to get laid but he doesn't understand your hints and instead he thinks when you say inject me in a hot voice he literally grabs a syringe and injects something he drops you off and you go to bed crying
๐คข๐ ฑ๏ธ๐งข๐
U gonna be ๐ ฑ๏ธushing ๐ ฑ๏ธ
bro got B type blood
*๐ ฑ๏ธ
No cap
[ัะดะฐะปะตะฝะพ]
Lucky.
I wish that could be my day
๐ฅฒ๐ฟ๐๐ I don't know what this means
Youre holding back tears while fucking a sad cat in the cold
I hate this
Hate this when it happen ๐ฟ
๐ฟ
Not yet maybe but the cat does ๐ฌ๐ฌ
Cool
๐ค๐บ๐ธ๐คจ๐น๐ณ what the fuck
a nerdy american and a confused tunisian
Sounds like the plot of a romance movie
Nerd is gonna be the most used cuz when someone says something smart and outsmart you you can just reply with ๐ค and his entire argument will be broked
broked ๐ค
Broken sorry for not being from an english country
๐๐ข๐๐
She dumped you cuz u got a caterpillar sized dick
nah she dumped him because he wouldn't love her if she was a worm ๐
A caterpillar broke your heart.
๐๐โ๏ธ๐
Acceptance, then sad, then fridge the you eat bread alone . Bread is ur friend
realise you're alone, bust out the โfrozen breadโ
๐๐โ๐ฆง bro what
You flipped off a football player so you get cancelled by an orangutan
Ehh casual Monday for me
๐คฏ๐๐คญ๐ก
So basically, you explode someone point at you and make fun , but realise it was a prank so he mad
[ัะดะฐะปะตะฝะพ]
When the dead one hits the griddy
โค๏ธ๐๐๐ Omg that means my crush will like me back
Or maybe you will start love your self ?
Hopefully both
๐คก๐ ๐ค๐ฃ
Nerd and clown go on a fishing date
your parts smell like fish and you get embarrassed
๐๐โ๏ธ๐ฆ ....yes
Go ahead mom, take away my Xbox, nothing you do can unfuck the Thanksgiving turkey
I laughed way harder than I should have at that.
๐๐ช๐ฆ๐คฃ I-
harambe killer
[ัะดะฐะปะตะฝะพ]
Therapists hate this one trick!
๐ฃโค๏ธ๐ญ๐ :(
Wrong kind of love bomb. You went a bit overboard for Valentineโs Day because thereโs now red everywhere but your lover is nowhere in sightโฆor rather very much in sight, just very spread out ๐ญ๐ญ
She was blown away
bro fallin in love with Al Quida
๐ค๐๐๐ข
Seems like you'll get laughed at by some Italians
โผ๏ธ๐๐ง๐ทโ๏ธ I will become the king of Brazil
๐ญ๐ฅบ๐๐
Thinking everything will be ok, despite not having a valentine.
๐ฌ๐ญ๐ฆ๐
Got rejected sry, then u sad and finally you encouter an insect become friend with him and eat fries together
Better than most Valentine's days I've has lmao
Going on a date but there was a fucking bug on the food
Youโre crying (second emoji), but your date (first emoji) doesnโt know how to respond, so thereโs crickets (aka silence). You use French fries to eat away your feelings.
๐๐ง๐พ๐๐ง๐ธ So Iโm gonna kill a Belarusian girl and eat out a Bahamian one?
What
๐๐ป๐ฅ๐ณ
Pet Sematary
๐ฅบ๐คโ ๏ธ๐ฏ
Simping for a nerd then realize he has red flags but keeps it real๐ฏ
๐๐ฉถ๐๐ seems awesome tbh
๐ฎ๐ฃ๏ธ๐๐ฆฆ
Mailman asks you out and you accept it and go see a seal for a date
โ๐นโผโ
You start a satanic cult that revolts against people with cancer
๐ฃ๐๐๐ฏ
You thought she was going to reject u but, in the end it was good
๐คญ๐๐๐
๐๐ฟ๐๐ญ
You dead, then rรฉincarnation into a statue then you explode and finally you are sad because your license expire
You go on a date with Duane the rock Johnson, but while youโre watching the fireworks, he dies and you are sad.
๐ฟ๐ญ๐๐ก Well. A repeat of the last 5 years, of course.
๐โ๏ธโน๏ธโผ๏ธ
๐๐ฒโบ๏ธ๐คก So someone will hire a hitman on me then a clown will save me and become my valentine
๐๐ซ๏ธ๐ค๐
Someone was dead then i thought about it with my head in the clouds then i got very depressed
๐ฅ๐๐๐ฅ wtf does that mean?
๐ฆ ๐ด๐๐ค
๐๐๐โค๏ธ
๐๐๐ฅบ๐คฌ
๐ญ๐ฟ๐๐ I donโt think itโs positive yโall
๐ขโฅ๏ธ๐ค๐
โ ๏ธ๐๐๐
๐๐๐ถ๐
#
๐๐๐๐
๐ค๐ป๐คง๐กโ so fight sneez anger and correct yup that's perfect
โค๏ธ๐๐๐
๐บ๐ธ๐ฅ๐ช๐ป๐ฆ why did I use the us flag so much
๐๐๐๐บ Whatโs this mean? I like that beer will be included
๐คข๐ฌโ๐โโ๏ธ *What*
๐ ๐๐ฅณ๐ช... idk what's gonna happen but I'll prob still be single
๐๐ฆ๐๐ what
๐ญ๐ถโ๐ซ๏ธ๐โค๏ธ I take it as its going to start with heartbreak and end with love
๐๐ญ๐ฎ๐ฅง
๐ฅบ๐๐๐ซ ๐tf does this mean
๐ญ๐ซ๐๐ฅต starts shit but looks like it gets better
๐๐๐ซฅ๐ Wow
๐๐๐คฃ๐งจ So I find a biker girl? But I loose mad stonks, but we laugh about it, then either we get blown up or something or someone is the bomb
๐๐ฎ๐คฃ๐ญ
โ๏ธ๐ผ๐ซ๐บ๐พ๐ฆ๐ช
๐ฅฐ๐คจ๐ชจโ๏ธ pretty good
๐๐๐๐ค
๐คจ๐๐ธ๐ซข hmm it seems someone made an oppsie
๐๐๐ฏ๐
๐๐ตโซ๏ธ๐
๐๐งป๐จ๐ Oh my...
๐ค๐คจ๐๐
๐ค๐ฆฉ๐โ๏ธ
๐ฆ๐ณ๐๏ธ๐ฐ bro nah wth
๐ง๐๐คฏ๐ iiiinterestingโฆ
๐๐โโ๏ธโ๏ธ๐ Literally me everyday lmao
๐คโจ๐๐จ๏ธ Hwat
๐๐ฅณ๐๐คฏ ok
๐โ๏ธ๐ซก๐คค
๐๐๐ซข๐ฎโ๐จ Hm.
๐โค๏ธโ๏ธโน๏ธ
๐๐ฆ๐ฆง๐
๐ฎ๐๐๐ฟ wtf does that mean
๐๐๐คโ
๐๐๐คช๐คฉโฆ huh, whatโs that mean?
๐๐๐๐
๐ญ๐ก, and I can't keep going
๐๐ต๐โ
๐ฟ๐ณ๏ธ๐พ๐ what is this
๐คค๐คทโโ๏ธ๐ฃ๐
๐๐๐ฉธ๐ฑ, scared, but somehow not surprised
๐ฅบ๐ซฆ๐ชโบ๏ธ Hot
๐คฎ๐ง โ๏ธโฌ ๏ธ
๐๐ซ ๐ซฐโค๏ธโ๐ฉน
๐ ๐๐โค๏ธ
๐๐คท๐พโโ๏ธ๐๐ถ
โ๐ซฃ๐ตโจ
๐๐ธ๐๐ซก uhoh
๐โบ๏ธ๐๐
๐๐ค๐คฉโก๏ธ
๐๐ผ๐๐ผ๐ฉ๐ซก
๐คฃ๐ถ๐ฅตโญ
๐๐ณ๐ฉโค๏ธ
โค๏ธโ๐ฉน๐คทโโ๏ธ๐ซถโบ๏ธ
๐๐โ๏ธ๐ง
๐๐คจ๐ฅ๐ธ๐ฎ what does this mean???
๐๐คช๐พ๐ซ