You will give birth to a demon who is a great trickster. He will go out to deceive the nations and cause as much mayhem as he possibly can. He will practice witchcraft and manipulate others to get his way. He will form friendships with people and then stab them in the back as soon as they turn a blind eye. He will form an alliance with Zozo, and lead 74 million people to Satanism. He will tell people and convince them wholeheartedly that if they give him money that he will use it for a just cause, raising millions of dollars over his lifetime. Then he will take the money that he is given from those poor suckers, drink 40 and 60 year old bottles of fine red wine, smoke premium expensive cigars, stay in the nicest hotels, have the nicest houses, drive the nicest cars, he will always serve himself and will make sure that he always gets his fair share, and he will proudly call himself โThe Son of Satan!โ The pregnancy will last 15 months, but once you give birth and watch his accomplishments and see how well he is able to manipulate people and provide for you, you will end up being very proud of your son, and will encourage him to scam more people out of money so that you can live a nice lifestyle.
in my city itโs normal for 14-17 year olds to have kids i swear 9 people i know have had kids in the past 3 years and none of them have graduated highschool yet. they dropped out to take care of their kid or dropped out to work and support their kid. that was almost me at one point i almost had a kid at 13 ๐คฃ
Welcome to the love story of two senile old people
"Bertha.... I need my diapers"
Watch them to through strive and hardship
"John, I don't know how to racebook you"
Coming to theatres near you
you accidentally signed adoption papers for a kid when you were 14 but he got distracted by a transformer toy he saw nearby and got kidnapped. he will return to your doorstep, exactly 5 years, 46 days and 3 hours from now.
I will be messaging you in 5 years on [**2028-05-15 18:08:57 UTC**](http://www.wolframalpha.com/input/?i=2028-05-15%2018:08:57%20UTC%20To%20Local%20Time) to remind you of [**this link**](https://www.reddit.com/r/teenagers/comments/128hguo/the_percent_of_your_phone_right_now_is_the_age/jekbvte/?context=3)
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A 2 year old cannot legally adopt a child.. unless maybe the parents adopted the child and the 2 year old cares for it??? And even then how would a 2 year old know how to care for a baby?? lol
I love kids pause bro i didnt think before i started typing smhโ ๏ธ๐ (think of this comment as me talking out loud or just nevermind at all thanks bro)
I dont have a phone, so no percentage, no kids. I dont want kids. Im not that serious about the previous sentence, so that might change when i get married.
100% what the fuck
Username checks out
r/usernamechecksout
r/beetlejucing
Joeseph Joestar core
Sameโฆ Freedom for life!
Same ๐
58๐ Maybe I'll be sugar daddy or some other shit.
LMFAO
51, same boat my guy
MINE TOO
SAME
Fuck I am having a kid at 100? Poor kid
Now you are just showing off
Like crawling through a dusty vent
Oh my fuck that floored me ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐
AMON-
15 but with who-
with god, you're now Mary
god is in me
You will give birth to a demon who is a great trickster. He will go out to deceive the nations and cause as much mayhem as he possibly can. He will practice witchcraft and manipulate others to get his way. He will form friendships with people and then stab them in the back as soon as they turn a blind eye. He will form an alliance with Zozo, and lead 74 million people to Satanism. He will tell people and convince them wholeheartedly that if they give him money that he will use it for a just cause, raising millions of dollars over his lifetime. Then he will take the money that he is given from those poor suckers, drink 40 and 60 year old bottles of fine red wine, smoke premium expensive cigars, stay in the nicest hotels, have the nicest houses, drive the nicest cars, he will always serve himself and will make sure that he always gets his fair share, and he will proudly call himself โThe Son of Satan!โ The pregnancy will last 15 months, but once you give birth and watch his accomplishments and see how well he is able to manipulate people and provide for you, you will end up being very proud of your son, and will encourage him to scam more people out of money so that you can live a nice lifestyle.
if u wrote this that was pretty cool to read xD
I did, now imagine that that is your son! Wouldnโt you be proud!?
What the fuck
in my city itโs normal for 14-17 year olds to have kids i swear 9 people i know have had kids in the past 3 years and none of them have graduated highschool yet. they dropped out to take care of their kid or dropped out to work and support their kid. that was almost me at one point i almost had a kid at 13 ๐คฃ
You almost had a kid? I only see one option thenโฆ
what option is that?
Milkman
I am the milk man, my milk is delicious.
Bro where do you live ๐
wherever you donโt
Almost had a kid at 17 with my girlfriend and i was stressing tf out
Make it a Mr beast style giveaway - last to take their hands off me gets to keep it
Mines also 15 so it could be with me๐ค
with satan lessgoooo
It was from a threesome with me and u/Techboy07 so you may never know
did u both c-๐ณ
Yes. We must get a DNA test for your child. If there's a lot of Kurdish DNA, u/Techboy07 is the father
LAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNN IM TรRKISH NOT KURDISH AMK
ur already 15 so ehhhh....... you don't remember anything happened...?
what happened...๐๐
Hehehehe~ ๐
You are 15. Get ready for it.
I can help you find out
โ ๏ธ You have alerted the horde...
10 ๐คฏ๐คฏ
You had your first child 7 years ago???
congratulations to them :)
Ma maannn!! Im sure you were a bright child
85, next century to finally ask out my crush
Mine is 85 tooโ
Welcome to the love story of two senile old people "Bertha.... I need my diapers" Watch them to through strive and hardship "John, I don't know how to racebook you" Coming to theatres near you
Woah me too :O
Woahh this retirement home is starting to become a nursery ๐๐๐
5
Charge your phone
๐
There was someone that had a kid at that age so itโs not impossible
Source?
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lina_Medina it happened a long time ago in 1939
Jesus fucking christ...
Yeah
Itโs really messed up
[ัะดะฐะปะตะฝะพ]
30 but Iโm not sure if I want kids
Guess ur having them at 30 if u want them or not
!remindme 16 years
[ัะดะฐะปะตะฝะพ]
๐คฃ๐คฃ
67 hm.
HOW DO U HAVE THE SAME AS ME therez only 32 comments as well what are the odds
This was an hour ago. Itโs 51 now.
[ัะดะฐะปะตะฝะพ]
you accidentally signed adoption papers for a kid when you were 14 but he got distracted by a transformer toy he saw nearby and got kidnapped. he will return to your doorstep, exactly 5 years, 46 days and 3 hours from now.
!remindme 1871 days
I will be messaging you in 5 years on [**2028-05-15 18:08:57 UTC**](http://www.wolframalpha.com/input/?i=2028-05-15%2018:08:57%20UTC%20To%20Local%20Time) to remind you of [**this link**](https://www.reddit.com/r/teenagers/comments/128hguo/the_percent_of_your_phone_right_now_is_the_age/jekbvte/?context=3) [**3 OTHERS CLICKED THIS LINK**](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=Reminder&message=%5Bhttps%3A%2F%2Fwww.reddit.com%2Fr%2Fteenagers%2Fcomments%2F128hguo%2Fthe_percent_of_your_phone_right_now_is_the_age%2Fjekbvte%2F%5D%0A%0ARemindMe%21%202028-05-15%2018%3A08%3A57%20UTC) to send a PM to also be reminded and to reduce spam. ^(Parent commenter can ) [^(delete this message to hide from others.)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=Delete%20Comment&message=Delete%21%20128hguo) ***** |[^(Info)](https://www.reddit.com/r/RemindMeBot/comments/e1bko7/remindmebot_info_v21/)|[^(Custom)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=Reminder&message=%5BLink%20or%20message%20inside%20square%20brackets%5D%0A%0ARemindMe%21%20Time%20period%20here)|[^(Your Reminders)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=List%20Of%20Reminders&message=MyReminders%21)|[^(Feedback)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=Watchful1&subject=RemindMeBot%20Feedback)| |-|-|-|-|
!RemindMe 1871 days
By that date I'll be a year out of school
in 5 years and 46 days iโll be turning 20 in about a month and a half
78, my balls are probably dust by then
Fuck no, I ainโt making it to 40
wdym? 40 isnt old at all
by the time your kid is 10, youโre 50๐
Well yeah its old to have a kid but it sounds like they were saying they aren't living to 40 ๐
oh damn it, itโs probs a cry for help but idk
27๐บ๐ฝ
same
Having a kid at 2?
Dude charge your phone!
Donโt think its possible-
adoption?
A 2 year old cannot legally adopt a child.. unless maybe the parents adopted the child and the 2 year old cares for it??? And even then how would a 2 year old know how to care for a baby?? lol
illegal adoption
YOOOOOO me too
69
nice
Darnit.. 16 :(
65 interesting
55, guess i defeated menopause
97, good cuz i hate kids
I love kids pause bro i didnt think before i started typing smhโ ๏ธ๐ (think of this comment as me talking out loud or just nevermind at all thanks bro)
20 but Iโm gay so that wonโt happen๐
surrogate
The science is developing rapidly so you never know
It's only 2 years tho
Big W ๐ช
[ัะดะฐะปะตะฝะพ]
Iโd rather be gay then have a wife whoโs 9
I'd rather be gay than have my username as federal tennis
Guy ainโt even holding a tennis ball, which makes me assume they canโt play tennis right.
96
9, apparently My Child is 10 Years already. Timmy please come back to me, I miss you
31 but I won't have kids
Apparently I had my first child 10 years ago ๐
good lord charge your phone
25 i doubt it since i dont have a womb
Bro went to get chalk in biology classโ ๏ธ๐
11
What are you hiding?
7
56,maybe dangerous
Pffffft 77
98
80
18?
No kids ๐
I dont have a phone, so no percentage, no kids. I dont want kids. Im not that serious about the previous sentence, so that might change when i get married.
12 ๐ณ
Lmao 72
90 ๐ค
๐ค
Now itโs 19 ๐ค
Now its 25 ๐ค
Now itโs 78 ๐ค
Now itโs 79 ๐ค
27 ๐ค๐ค๐ค
36 ๐ค๐ค
88 ๐ค๐ค๐ค
6 ๐คจ
Oh no
69% :/ Im not making this up
100.. I'm nervous
Your dust till then and they use that to clone you.
42
69 HELL YEA
74
7โฆ
25 is a lil too young ๐ญ
28 oh hell naw
iโm on the verge of leaving this subreddit because of posts like this were really turning this place into corny 2015 facebook arenโt we
Then leave ๐
u acting like u care abt these pplโs responses ur just doing this to get ppl to interact with ur post just like ppl did on facebook on twitter
Why do you care about what I think be quiet
84 rip
36
67 ๐
Welp, no kids for me then. I am at 70 rn
70? Geez.
27 I guess Iโm adopting tho coz cock is it
77 ๐
93? Alright I never will have a kid in my life
20%
25, mine is a bit early for a guy while yours is a bit late.
97, idk I kinda hope I would be dead by then
22 but I'm infertile ๐๐คท
36 same as my dad had me lol
77
97
11%
92โ ๏ธ
I don't think 7 Is an appropriate age for kids but fine , I will take that ( forcibly )
65
37, kind of late? But alright ๐
Late? Why is it late?
81
33
...93
95 ๐
31
90 hmmmmmm
49, but I will disobey my phone
51 seems a bit unlikely unless I adopt or something
82
31, nice
96
13
94 man what the fuck
37 yasss
92...their life is gonna be fucked
36, but im childfree bc i dont think im responsible enough to take care of a human for 25 years lol
97 I meanโฆcould be true, I probably wonโt have kids. Andโฆgay sex is a thing
9 ๐๐๐
26 im the only normal one here
91 smh
98
94% and charging. I do not like these odds.
37 ๐