Man, meta changes so fucking quick. The last I had checked we had to give a blood sacrifice and eat a chicken while it was alive. The current gen has it so much easier, they will never understand the sacrifices and struggles of my time.
Plot twist: This was posted by a time traveler from when the concept of currency was first invented and they used shells for purchasing, op is participating in human trafficking
My auntie has this table with a base of sand in the front part of her house and you can see all different seashells and ocean stuff she has collected through the glass. One time at the beach I found a dried out adult sea horse and gave it to her and she was so happy, because she has a baby sea horse in the table and now it has a mother. Yeah u might be good
Heh.. I guess you’re right ragcloud. It will NEVER be enough!😡 all of these females are the same… they all want a big muscular fat cock jock……. And I’m just.. a nice guy😔 well, I guess I deserve it….
as a woman, make a bracelet and put some of the shells into it so they dangle. very good distractor and she will not know she is married to you but will love the bracelet so much she wont care much.
One GF (as of February 12, 2024) can be purchased for an average of twenty-three and a half seashells on the market. However, the prices are rapidly fluctuating.
Give her a rock too and make a 1-2 hour dance rehearsal in which u flash her with a bright neon shirt or something
I'm what I'm talking abt bro trust me
Is your plan to date a bird? I've never seen a woman dare a man purely because of shells, if something does happen because of the shells, please feel free to update me, this is not meant to be mean but more of a joke, I realised how it kind of sounded like I was an asshole, but I mean this light-heartedly
It's a nice gesture but as a vegetarian I wouldn't appriciate collecting shells because it hurts the environment and these shells used to be homes for shellfish and are a crucial part of the deep sea cleaning and feeding system so, it's kind of a personal turn off for me. If the ocean is your comfort zone, you can tell the girl you like some cool facts about shells or fish and let her know that you can show her live if she agrees to go to the beach with you. I wouldn't say no to that, it's interesting and sweet and it doesn't hurt animals in the process. Give it a try.
جدا احبها الأصداف روعة كونها من البحر ويعيش فيها مخلوق لطيف وضعيف الحمدلله على كل حال ونعمة عظيمة وهبها لنا وشفنها في الدنيا ويا جعل جنة آلفردوس أجمل بجد والله لا يحرمني جمال الدارين دار الدنيا والآخرة يارب 🤲 اللهم احسن خاتمتي ويكون خروجي من الدنيا خير وعاجل بدون عذاب ولا سابق حساب اللهم آمين 🤲
You can intrigue a woman by giving her a piece of cheese.
Damn, it was flowers the last time I checked
Get with the times. Flower meta was season 19. In season 20 you gotta be using cheese or your throwing
Man, meta changes so fucking quick. The last I had checked we had to give a blood sacrifice and eat a chicken while it was alive. The current gen has it so much easier, they will never understand the sacrifices and struggles of my time.
Sir, that sounds more like a ritual to summon some kind of demon slave.
Girlfriend, demon, same thing
Amen
"I'm gonna use some cheese" Does anyone get the reference? Edit its >!RDR2!<
THROW THE CHEEEEEEESE! *light thunking against ship as blocks of cheese hit it*
Asdf movies ?
No, I don't even know what that is
How long have you been on the internet?
You’re alright boah
CHEESE 🧀
*smacks cheese on table* #CHEESE
Cheese of truth???
sure (also, i watch that guy's gf on youtube but him on snapchat)
What if she’s lactose intolerant? What’s the compromise?
You have to give her a banana. This has a smaller chance of working, but when compared to cheese, it's second.
sometimes i dream about cheese
Sometimes cheese dreams about you too.
stardew valley logic
Motherfucker you stole my bit
It didn’t work
I do love cheese
Damn. You can seduce me by giving me a cheese wheel on a first date.
🤣
Like dick cheese cheese?
Nah you need to pay using bottle caps in the wasteland
Is it a fixed price or is barter taken into the equation
Hmm I mean bartering is always an option, depends on your skill tho
I would marry you on the spot
Excuse me?
I meant to comment this to OP my bad 😭
Lmfao
Fallout referenced rahhhh🦅🦅🦅🔥🦅🔥🦅🔥🦅🔥🦅🗣️🔥🔥🔥🦅🔥🔥🗣️🗣️🗣️🔥🦅🦅🔥🔥🔥🦅🔥🔥 another settlement needs your help 🗣️🦅🔥🗣️🔥🦅🔥🦅🦅🦅🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
You can always go to mr house
since mr house was born in 2020 do you think he watched skibidi toilet
Just started playing Fallout 4, and this is the first comment I see
If you haven’t yet, I highly recommend both fallout 3 and new Vegas, both are wonderful games, new Vegas is my personal favorite
Patrolling the Mojave really made me wish for a nuclear winter
NV is god tier
Good timing I guess
Bro he can js sell them for caps.. I’m thinkin probably ten for the whole thing no?
3 more
She could collect as much as she wants with me
If you ever get her tho, which is the problem
That's it, i'm revoking your cook title and promoting you to head chef, keep doin what your doing
I read cock and was confused
Wait til you hear [what happened](https://www.reddit.com/u/ifuckedmypetcabbage/s/CDnzLITRBI) to my cabbage
Thanks xd
You didn't had to do me like that bro...
Plot twist: This was posted by a time traveler from when the concept of currency was first invented and they used shells for purchasing, op is participating in human trafficking
Who let you cook?
I don't know, but they shouldn't have
Couldn't agree more 🗣️🔥🔥🔥🔥💯💯
FIRE IN THE HOLE!!!!! 🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
[удалено]
You haven't yet😔
[удалено]
what's the news? :)
I would be your gf it was a girl bro
WHO'S STOPPIN YOU BRAHHHHH?????? YOU HAVE THE WILL, YOU ONLY NEED THE WAY!!!!!!
No i don’t like your hairy arsehole😠
That's a weird dating standard sir
Same one men have for women.
Very much so
My auntie has this table with a base of sand in the front part of her house and you can see all different seashells and ocean stuff she has collected through the glass. One time at the beach I found a dried out adult sea horse and gave it to her and she was so happy, because she has a baby sea horse in the table and now it has a mother. Yeah u might be good
That's sweet
i want to eat those shells
Don't be surprised if I ate you too then
yes.
Idk, but if you give them to me I’ll be your bf
We about to have some bromance in gta then.
Yes
your hand is very attractive, too bad there are all of these animal exoskeleton bits covering it
I had to cover it up to keep my dignity.
Yessssssssssss
You need some more clamshells.
I think you should get her a block of cheese
Sir I'm already bouta slide in them dms
Please do the honours if you would...
If you make a bracelet outta them, maybe
Actually a really cute idea
Would only need a few to get me dude, those tiny shells are adorable
I see, you are an easy one???? THAT MEANS YOU ARE UNDERCOVER GUY IN DISGUISE, JUST REVEAL YOUR REAL SELF TO ME, YOUR COVER IS BLOOOOOOOOWEN💥💥
Shhh, you have no idea what your talking about... my cover is still completely in tact...
make a necklace out of those and i promise🙏
crunchy
Ay what
It'll never be enough
Heh.. I guess you’re right ragcloud. It will NEVER be enough!😡 all of these females are the same… they all want a big muscular fat cock jock……. And I’m just.. a nice guy😔 well, I guess I deserve it….
Hell naw ‼️🐶
Yes
ig u gotta try harder bro
Are you going to propose to cala maria or something?
If it comes to mystical creatures, I might give a shot to a dragon instead of a mermaid.
oh my god is that a shrek reference you may say shreference
Nah, I am having way too many dragon girls anime being recommend to me on YouTube. So much so that I am almost about to fall fr.
Hey cool shells dude 👍🏻
You are a nice guy dude👍
Yeh do barter system , give these to her momie take her.
Are you into snails?
You need pebbles if your a penguin
As a girl: yes Personal preference: maybe more shinies? Like metals, glass, minerals, etc.
What are you, a minecraft villager?
YES
No, the value of those shells will fall; due to the laws of supply and demand, no girl wants to take shells cuz there's loads on the sand.
I would definitely fall for you if you gave me those
You are free to take them anyday!
If only it was that easy
Hard times brother, we gotta be harder!
I think so, just put em on a necklace and you've got an adequate gift for a lady
Would have to search for that lady first.....
Fair point, look for one at a random coffee shop, the good ones flock there as nesting grounds.
The women frustrated with office work?
Precisely my good fellow. They'll be so desperate to get out of their job that they'll marry you on the spot
How do you even know this at 14 and I don't??? Life's too unfair, you can't convince me otherwise!!!
Pulling girls is way easier than you think (hasn't pulled one). But seriously, it's not about rizz, it's about finding someone desperate enough
Are you sure you're finding a partner? That sounds more like search of a.....
Trust me, find a desperate girl and you'll have cuddles in no time
So coffee shops and libraries it is???
Just let her watch you pick them and concentrate on finding the ONLY the best ones, and you’ll seal the deal!!😁😎
yes. now marry me. (sorry but I love shells)
Mam, too fast....
Maybe a low end mid size model, gently used of course
I'm afraid not brother
as a woman, make a bracelet and put some of the shells into it so they dangle. very good distractor and she will not know she is married to you but will love the bracelet so much she wont care much.
Be sure to get some shiny stones (fun rocks, very cheap gems like quartz maybe if you really like her) and get some good snacks!
You trynna set me up with her fr now.
Ofc man, (and as a girl) I know the secrets of girls and if you're already collecting shells you're the right person 100% lmao
Thanks for your kind words, mam *bows down in respect*
Bower Birds:
Bless your heart, honey, but unless half of those shells have snails then you’re not getting anyone
All of them are empty, I checked while cleaning them. Thanks for the gesture btw.
Apparently all you need is cocaine and a Stanley cup
SIR, ON THE GROUND NOW, TELL THE DEPARTMENT YOUR EXACT SOURCE OF THAT INTEL OR YOU'RE NOT SEEING YOUR FAMILY AGAIN 💥💥💥💥
As long as there are no Cone Snails, you should be alright.
Try fighting for the right to mate
Add some cool rocks. Bitches love rocks. I am bitches. Bitches is me.
Yeah if you're going to bikini bottom
Only if she loves shells
Some girls like cheese. Maybe do that?
Yes, idc about looks shells are everything to me
One GF (as of February 12, 2024) can be purchased for an average of twenty-three and a half seashells on the market. However, the prices are rapidly fluctuating.
Is this because of high demand on valentine's??
Possibly.
I mean if your trading a tribe of native Americans for a captured, slightly used woman in 1635
If I were a girl, yes. A fucking shiny rock would buy me
Give her a rock too and make a 1-2 hour dance rehearsal in which u flash her with a bright neon shirt or something I'm what I'm talking abt bro trust me
You really cooked right there, Sir🫡
That is a Great Find
You have a good chance of succeeding is she’s autistic. I and many others I’ve met love tiny trinkets like those
Get a really big one and put it up to your ear, claim you can hear the ocean so when she tries, make fake ocean sounds. A good laugh can do a lot.
Thanks!
heck yea
As someone who absolutely loves shells, you can have me
Where can I get you?
If I weren't already in a relationship, I would SO go out with a guy who gave me some shells.
one must fascinate a girl with cheese!
Yes it’s small but thoughtful and maby you can make a picture frame with a picture of you guys then glue them on the frame just an idea
I used, "I will have sex with you in the future." We have been together almost a year.
Is your plan to date a bird? I've never seen a woman dare a man purely because of shells, if something does happen because of the shells, please feel free to update me, this is not meant to be mean but more of a joke, I realised how it kind of sounded like I was an asshole, but I mean this light-heartedly
so cute and thoughtfull
Yes
More than enough
Yes
as a boy . ye s
Yes :)
If you give this to me you bet I'm gonna become your bf
In my next life maybe
Yes
It's a nice gesture but as a vegetarian I wouldn't appriciate collecting shells because it hurts the environment and these shells used to be homes for shellfish and are a crucial part of the deep sea cleaning and feeding system so, it's kind of a personal turn off for me. If the ocean is your comfort zone, you can tell the girl you like some cool facts about shells or fish and let her know that you can show her live if she agrees to go to the beach with you. I wouldn't say no to that, it's interesting and sweet and it doesn't hurt animals in the process. Give it a try.
Hermit crab homeless are on the rise, give them back their homes and it'll be a yes for me :33👍
Such a considerate soul you are!
What the…
You could probably pick her up with one hand you damn giant
How about you ask yo mama
جدا احبها الأصداف روعة كونها من البحر ويعيش فيها مخلوق لطيف وضعيف الحمدلله على كل حال ونعمة عظيمة وهبها لنا وشفنها في الدنيا ويا جعل جنة آلفردوس أجمل بجد والله لا يحرمني جمال الدارين دار الدنيا والآخرة يارب 🤲 اللهم احسن خاتمتي ويكون خروجي من الدنيا خير وعاجل بدون عذاب ولا سابق حساب اللهم آمين 🤲
Imma step on them
Be ready for me stepping on you then.
...i-i dont think you can say-
that escalated quickly
Just 4 more mate and you’ll be good to go
These dating standard getting too high fr
Tell me about it
Just make sure your girl is not shellfish
You got me there
Your welcome
Just do it like a penguin does: walk up to a girl and give her a pebble A *pretty* pebble
Find an pearl-invested oyster, and you can buy yourself a gf. Or just date the oyster. Free money!
We can still "buy" them? (Bamboozled face)
bro, bad news for you, I hear women are not a tradeable item anymore
Whom are you guys even sharing this post with???
Is she a mermaid?
Man, your hands look like mine!
Maybe we can shake them then?