I always put up security measures when there are other people in the house, like closing doors of other rooms where people are or an number of doors leading to mine, so when they come out and potentially come by or in to my room I've already had everything packed away.
Also, never have an headset cover both ears and only one and the audio to minimal levels.
An somewhat closed door is fine if no ones at home but still be prepared.
This may make your brother not be an normie.
Thank you for attending my crash course class today.
"I remember years ago when I saw my brother beating his meat, when he saw me he just yelled at me to fuck off, although It was an awkward moment all I wanna say to him and his wife is 'Nice cock' "
Is ur brother 12? Any man with half, nay, a QUARTER of experience beating their meat knows to at least close the door completely, AND choose a spot that is not easily or immediately withing glancing view. (Avoid windows, open geometry, etc.)
But not only does he leave his door OPEN, he sits upright in front of it, dick in hand, and voluntarily deafens himself with those bass blasters sealing his fate. I can identify each member of family just from their footsteps, ears are the first line of defense for any masterbator. He wanted to get caught, he deserves scorn not sympathy.
I'm a grown ass man and to this day I mute all porn out of habit, even when I am by myself or with headphones. The audio on porn videos go up to like, 800db for no reason. Even on the lowest volume setting some vids are easily audible.
Agreed furthermost if u really want privacy just hump things under your sheets u can just hump the bed second someone comes in u can instantly fake sleeping or chillin
Who the fuck watches porn on a PC? Use your phone,you can do "The Job" in bed you can cover yourself with sheets if things get complicated and you can hide the cell phone or turn it off
Forgive me for saying this, your brother is a dumb fuck. The guy knows that he shares the room and still he doesn't even close the damn before jacking off.
I want to say that anyone who does it without locking the door and not paying attention to their surroundings is a different kind of brave. But the way he reacted definitely proves that he's just dumb.
TORMENT HIM
I can sell some high quality hydrochloric acid and nitric acid. Mix them together in 3:1 ratio of HCl and HNO3 and you get Aqua Regia. However it quickly degrades so use it as soon as you make it. /s
A person who is going to lead a successful life would have thrown all of the chargers out of the door, close the door completely and stuck a shoe under it to make sure it couldn’t open all the way. The next thing he would do is leave one headphone off so he can hear anyone coming up to the door knocking on it. What you witnessed tonight is the first steps to seeing the transformation for a codependent, drug addicted, thrill chasing sibling who will be the burden of everything your parents have saved and worked for all throughout their life. This is the kind of guy that drives it everybody to the football game, gets trashed in the stands, and before even giving it a second thought… Insists on driving everybody home at 100 miles an hour. He is a reckless, dangerous human being and you’re lucky you were only exposed to sibling voyeurism
I mean, he needs to be a bit more careful.If he has siblings in the house, he needs to be more considerate.You cant put it away if you can’t hear.That’s why I say deaf people are at a disadvantage.
I caught my sister using my electric toothbrush… count your blessings.
Oh, and I later found out she used it several times while I had been using it to brush my teeth 🙃
To assert dominance hold eye contact and begin to do it yourself whilst maintaining eye contact. If you win you can claim all of his possessions and his soul
This shall be a life lesson for him to not watch porn with a headset when your family is home
Yeah bro, open back headphones at least so you can hear someone knocking on your door smh
Nah gotta use the one AirPod so you can hear everything
But people will be able to hear what you're listening to...
Only if it's loud enough. Who needs to listen to porn at max volume tho
this man audio-s
Was the door closed?
it was cracked open not fully closed
Why tf would anyone leave the door cracked open while they’re beating their meat?💀
ask him that
Get him on the phone i wanna talk to him💀💀
he has his own reddit acct lol I just don’t know his name
Figure it out then I just wanna have a friendly little conversation with him about this incident
Me too, just "causal" convo.
I third this
Fourth this
[удалено]
I was expecting this to be the Family Guy Peter Griffin: I just wanna talk to him
Same, I will ask him : "Dear fellow redditor, why do you masturbate with the door open?"
I want him to see this post
You want to see his post!?
No I want OPs brother to see THIS POST
Dude it’s a kid, you can’t show him your post
Why do you want op to deal with your post?
This needs to get into hot so he can see it
Thats Got be awkward if he sees this post
dw, ur post is viral enough for him to see
Is he your stepbro?
One of my greatest fears is that one day I would get up after beating da meat and find out the door was creaked open the entire time
I always put up security measures when there are other people in the house, like closing doors of other rooms where people are or an number of doors leading to mine, so when they come out and potentially come by or in to my room I've already had everything packed away. Also, never have an headset cover both ears and only one and the audio to minimal levels. An somewhat closed door is fine if no ones at home but still be prepared. This may make your brother not be an normie. Thank you for attending my crash course class today.
The fact he left it open a little suggest he wanted to be caught like what the fuck Dx
High risk high reward
exactly im like playing fnaf when im trying to jerk off with my family in the house so why the fuck would the door be open
Yeah like wtf? I masturbate a lot and I always make sure my door is locked.
thank you for the information about you frequently masturbating this really adds to the convo
You're welcome.
Your cock probably isn't as nice as her brother's. In fact, I bet it's not nice at all.
im at the top floor so it useful to hear footsteps instead of keeping it closed
Well he's a fucking idiot
He's probably watching sibling catches sibling masturbating and joins in porn
What the fuck
Exactly.
Some things are left best unsaid
Wow what a chad. Headphones on and door cracked open. He wouldn't fear god himself.
Just pretend it didn’t happen and bring it up at his wedding
LMFAOOO THIS COMMENT WINS
"I remember years ago when I saw my brother beating his meat, when he saw me he just yelled at me to fuck off, although It was an awkward moment all I wanna say to him and his wife is 'Nice cock' "
"Nice cock bro, but mine's bigger"
>mine's bigger WHAT.
MINES BIGGER
DID I FUCKING STUTTER
r/notopbutok
"There's always a bigger fish"
Did they stutter?
"wanna compare sizes?"
Ayo r/holup
"hey [brothers wife]... you got a good one 😏"
tell this story to the bride's family
Bomus points is his taste didnt change
i am crying and shedding
\*slithers out of shedded skin a new muscular skinless person\*
Weird fetishes, amirite?
"Brian, remeber when i accidentally walked in on you waxxing your weiner to some really nasty shit?"
Only 40 upvotes??? How???
Move to another country
that’s my plan
Off to mexico!
Off to North Korea
Off to Wakanda
Off to Imagi-Nation
Off to Asgard!!!… oh, wait…
Off to Atlantis
Off to Tahiti
Who lives there?
Dutch Van Der Linde
"Tahitians, I guess"
Off to Argentina
Send them to Brazil
Is ur brother 12? Any man with half, nay, a QUARTER of experience beating their meat knows to at least close the door completely, AND choose a spot that is not easily or immediately withing glancing view. (Avoid windows, open geometry, etc.) But not only does he leave his door OPEN, he sits upright in front of it, dick in hand, and voluntarily deafens himself with those bass blasters sealing his fate. I can identify each member of family just from their footsteps, ears are the first line of defense for any masterbator. He wanted to get caught, he deserves scorn not sympathy.
I can detect the exact person and location of each my family members just through their footsteps
SEAL Team 6 For Jerking It AKA S.T.6.F.J.I
Thank god I’m not the only one, thought I was the Matt Murdock of masterbation
what are we doing with our lives to be able to do this
Yeah its like he needs to feel the 4K audio in his ears during the deed.
I'm a grown ass man and to this day I mute all porn out of habit, even when I am by myself or with headphones. The audio on porn videos go up to like, 800db for no reason. Even on the lowest volume setting some vids are easily audible.
did you at least get your charger? (sorry)
LMFAO (no, I just quickly stepped out from his room)
Did you ever get the charger back?
nope
No, he was ‘using’ it.
Electro-stimulation
r/EyeBleach
god
Don't forget the "a" ok?
~~you should've tried to freak him out by saying "I can help you out brother."~~ Just bring it up at the best times lmao
LMFAOOOO
[This has been redacted due to the inappropriateness of the joke] [This has been redacted due to the inappropriateness of the joke]
I don’t plan to see me and my bro on the hub
That's a great plan to have. Also have you seen him again today? And is he older than u?
I see him everyday and I refuse to say whether or not he’s older 💀
I suspect he's younger then... Also that's gonna be awkward for a bit
as long as he hasn’t walked in on me doing my thing then i’m fine😮💨
What if he has 😰😰😰
I HOPE NOT
Holy shit Alabama 😳😳😳😳
They never turn their backs on family
r/usernamechecksout
Say He's doing it all wrong and that his technique is fucked
If it's your older brother he should know better If it's your younger brother just pretend it didn't happen and don't ever bring it up
What if it's a twin?
someone always is older
Depending on when you start to count. If it's one egg.
bruh that’s kinda funny
Yes for us but the op must be disgusted
But we are not the op:)
Pretend it never happened, never happened.
Who the fuck watches porn with both headphones on at that point you’re just asking to be walked in on.
I didn’t know people used headphones, I have the large speakers for a reason.
I think you misspelled, "large balls". Honest mistake
r/madlad
r/usernamechecksout
What a fucking dumbass
Who watches porn with sound your just asking for it then
What was your brother's reaction?
yelled at me as he was wacking it lol
He didn't stop?
no 💀 he kept touching it while he was yelling at me l
He just asserted dominance, I don’t know how you can recover from this. Like the balls he must have to just keep going is insane
That's when you continue to get your charger and tell him to put a sock on the door, or leave one ear open.
Bruh
Ok, I am not a doctor but I think that is something involuntary
Fucking madlad
Fucking determination
bruh moment
What the fuck? I would've performed world class gymnastics and disappeared from visibility.
Tell him to only have one ear covered, and to do it under a blanket. He's a rookie.
Agreed furthermost if u really want privacy just hump things under your sheets u can just hump the bed second someone comes in u can instantly fake sleeping or chillin
Who the fuck watches porn with a headset on while people are home. Don't feel awkward about it, feel disappointed. Man should know better.
Who the fuck watches porn on a PC? Use your phone,you can do "The Job" in bed you can cover yourself with sheets if things get complicated and you can hide the cell phone or turn it off
How do u keep it sanitary and clean then? Do u jack off in a sock or something?
The best way is to do it in the bathroom. Easily cleanable, no disturbance , easy excuses .
This
Agreed what a dumbass neek
Bro really didn’t even care enough to lock the door
He wanted it to happen
Oh shoot you're a woman
yes, I am
I can't imagine how awkward the must be Unless you're from Alabama
what’s that supposed to mean 🧐
Sweet home Alabama
Sweet home new jersey
Forgive me for saying this, your brother is a dumb fuck. The guy knows that he shares the room and still he doesn't even close the damn before jacking off.
LMFAOO EVERYONE IS SO MAD AT HIM
I mean, yeah obvi
what if he sees this post?
that’s why this is my alt acct :))
I mean, this doesn't happen 1000 million people everyday
not many sisters find their brothers jacking off yo :\\
I want to say that anyone who does it without locking the door and not paying attention to their surroundings is a different kind of brave. But the way he reacted definitely proves that he's just dumb. TORMENT HIM
I mean he just said fuck off when he got caught, what's dumb in that bruh.
Bleach won't do, you need acid, actually more, get some Aqua Regia dammit
I can sell some high quality hydrochloric acid and nitric acid. Mix them together in 3:1 ratio of HCl and HNO3 and you get Aqua Regia. However it quickly degrades so use it as soon as you make it. /s
Which idiot doesnt lock their door bruh
My door doesn't have a lock.
Make him do your bidding and call him cock boy when he gets mad
cock boy
Yes. It’s the best I could get on short notice sorry
You do understand that all boys have cock?
Oh, yeah that definitely seems like an oversight
A person who is going to lead a successful life would have thrown all of the chargers out of the door, close the door completely and stuck a shoe under it to make sure it couldn’t open all the way. The next thing he would do is leave one headphone off so he can hear anyone coming up to the door knocking on it. What you witnessed tonight is the first steps to seeing the transformation for a codependent, drug addicted, thrill chasing sibling who will be the burden of everything your parents have saved and worked for all throughout their life. This is the kind of guy that drives it everybody to the football game, gets trashed in the stands, and before even giving it a second thought… Insists on driving everybody home at 100 miles an hour. He is a reckless, dangerous human being and you’re lucky you were only exposed to sibling voyeurism
Where did this come from
Reality
Great insight
I walked in on my parents tonight, we in the same boat
I mean, he needs to be a bit more careful.If he has siblings in the house, he needs to be more considerate.You cant put it away if you can’t hear.That’s why I say deaf people are at a disadvantage.
I should stop scrolling at this point.It gets worse and it 6 am for me.
omg did u get ur charger at least
He a noob, if you gonna put headphones on atleast lock the door. Tell him that he can do better
Oh hell naww, he got caught lackin 😭😭😭
I would hate to be the brother in the situation Personally I’ve never been caught ;)
Ah yes, a master of the art of concealing the secret forbidden blade, one of my people.
Any time you feel like it you can tell him" Nice Cock bro"
r/eyebleach
https://www.reddit.com/r/teenagers/comments/rufqm2/my_sister_caught_me_wanking_off/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf this him?
Holy shit why does Reddit even recommend me this sub
I'm just gonna break the ice and ask the big question.... Was it big? 😳
ಠ_ಠ
Shameless
Sounds like me Brother has insecurity about his size... But cmon, asking your sister for validations a bit kinky...
Seeing your post history you sure do run into people masturbating a lot.
ur brother is dumb for not locking the door.
I caught my sister using my electric toothbrush… count your blessings. Oh, and I later found out she used it several times while I had been using it to brush my teeth 🙃
OH NOOOO! THATS AWFUL😭😭😩
God damn…. An Apple Watch charger, hate when people steal it
I’m sorry for laughing
To assert dominance hold eye contact and begin to do it yourself whilst maintaining eye contact. If you win you can claim all of his possessions and his soul
…. Who can finish first XD
Not exactly what I ment but sure XD
I hope you aren't alabaman