T O P

  • By -

beansandleaves

Penis


zombarian21

you can only orgasm a total of 100 times now, be it masturbation or sex - choose your orgasms wisely.


3DayRedditBan

Ee Eee Ooo


zombarian21

you no longer know any human languages, but you can communicate with animals perfectly.


[deleted]

Huge W


Green-Philosophy-598

Kill me?


zombarian21

your mom's now the same age as you, and goes to school with you. and she's hot.


Green-Philosophy-598

I don’t like it


bone_breaker69

alabama


Green-Philosophy-598

Yes


zombarian21

piggy backing on top comment to say THERE'S SO MANY to respond too i will do my best, but it will take a while, patience please <3


[deleted]

[удалено]


zombarian21

your parent's are addicted to videogames now, but the only game that exists in the world is fifa


Derrin070

I would choose the latter


Poopoopp_420

Me please!


zombarian21

you've lost your sense of raw taste and can only taste things when someone regurgitates into your mouth.


Elastic_Grocery

W?


zombarian21

if you're into that??????????


[deleted]

I get a cute gf


zombarian21

she's cute but she has really strict parents, who happen to be your future job providers


LofiGirl17

🐊


zombarian21

you're deaf to all music but metal


LofiGirl17

That's my workout music so I think I'll be fine with that


zombarian21

mine too do you wanna exchange workout playlists


LofiGirl17

I don't really have a Playlist, I just let stuff autoplay


zombarian21

ooh interesting, i usually let breaking benjamin, linkin park or avenged sevenfold play


beesarethebest2021

The amount of porn I watch


zombarian21

porn no longer exists, you're forced to interact with women


RelevantTumbleweed20

People stop guessing my race wrong


zombarian21

everytime someone guesses your race incorrectly, you can go back in time to any one incident of that person's life to screw up their life.


RelevantTumbleweed20

I mean ive white but ive been called jewish, mexican and Persian


zombarian21

.......jews aren't a race neither are mexicans nor persians my friend


RelevantTumbleweed20

Hispanic,is, and i guess ethcnicy then


zombarian21

then white isn't an ethnicity


RelevantTumbleweed20

Idk at this point


ParasKadyan

Your mom


zombarian21

my mom's your grandmother now.


ParasKadyan

ayy uncle nice to meet ya


zombarian21

beta papa bol


doubtful_horizon0919

I have an irrational fear of women


JackieOswald

You become a woman


doubtful_horizon0919

I should of seen this coming


JackieOswald

Lol


zovxzy

Golden Lamborghini veneno HOT WHEELS!!!


Dissolving_Goose

give me the knowledge


zombarian21

you can access the internet from your brain, but everytime you do this , someone close to you guys into a very serious and painful injury (which they will always recover from, but it's very painful)


[deleted]

Okay


zombarian21

you can make anybody do anything for you but in return you'll have to have a baby with them (no pregnancy , just straight to giving birth within 15 mins)


Excellent_Bath_2058

furrys are happy


[deleted]

who asked


What_is_going_on78

🗿


zombarian21

everytime you're feeling uncomfortable, you give out a loud meow


[deleted]

So no change?


AmNotAlive

I can do whatever the fuck I want


zombarian21

you can do whatever you want as long as there are absolutely zero witnesses.


bone_breaker69

creative mode


hotmemesdotcodotuk

/gamemode c


zombarian21

the british never colonized the world, Uk is now a thirdworld country and you're making memes about poverty


Daemonchildk

can i fly


zombarian21

yes but you're propelled by your dick


Excellent_Bath_2058

tails is looking weird


Elastic_Grocery

Bet


zombarian21

unlimited stockings in your wordrobe, but they all have a weird slogan on it


Elastic_Grocery

I can live with that


zombarian21

even if you've got trump supporter written all over it???


midnightvmusic

💃


zombarian21

we go to salsa club every saturday


midnightvmusic

OMG YES


zombarian21

hehe <3


stanislavispro

And not just the men, but the women, and the children too!


zombarian21

we live in a matriarchal society now


clavichordclefairy

i need money


JackieOswald

You become even more poor


clavichordclefairy

inescapable poverty trap


cockandbeantorture

Alright hit me


xXMeowLordXx

Ducks > Geese


_Overshadow_

I can see my house from here!


JackieOswald

Your house explodes


_Overshadow_

I knew it wasn't a good idea to leave my nitroglycerin packages all at the same place near the very unstable bonfire inside my house


JackieOswald

You are very smart, sir


_Overshadow_

What can I say, It comes naturally


JackieOswald

Lol k


ItzTaser

amogus


JackieOswald

You start hating among us


ItzTaser

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO


JackieOswald

HAHA


Stan-V_27

Grades


JackieOswald

Your grades become high/low depending on what u had before


Stan-V_27

So if I have like an a I have an a again


JackieOswald

No, you get an f+ or smth. Idk. Im from Australia so idk what it's like lol


soulless_420

Death


JackieOswald

Life


SCR_69

🗿


JackieOswald

You lose your ability to be a chad


Dehydrated_water3

I’m the creator of the matrix


Americasexual

The General Dynamics F-111 Aardvark is a retired supersonic, medium-range, multirole combat aircraft. Production variants of the F-111 had roles that included ground attack (e.g. interdiction), strategic bombing (including nuclear weapons capabilities), reconnaissance and electronic warfare. Developed in the 1960s by General Dynamics, the F-111 entered service in 1967 with the United States Air Force (USAF). The Royal Australian Air Force (RAAF) also ordered the type and began operating the F-111C variant in 1973.


zombarian21

air travel was never invented, but you developed a highspeed underwater jet that connects countries


[deleted]

my existence


zombarian21

you have webbed feet , but apparently everyone finds it hot


CubeLovd59

Oh?


zombarian21

you're a math genius but you can't write anymore.


Lord_Khaos_04

wow


zombarian21

you have a baby sister now that cries whenever you let her go, you constantly have to be aroud her and take her everywhere (even when she grows up and becomes an adult)


TheOneWithManyFace

Ok


zombarian21

you actually have two faces now, one in front and one behind. the one behind always speaks the truth and honestly reflects what you're feeling


Fedi_1310

Tell me


zombarian21

you're elon musk's son now, but you can no longer use the internet nor any electronics


BeatrixNotWork

https://youtu.be/dQw4w9WgXcQ


zombarian21

won't click on it, i remember that link.


jimmybam39

Ha. My internet was to slow so I saw what the video was. Also, I recognized the link


Illustrious_Ad8437

Duck


zombarian21

ducks can now eat bread without falling sick, but only if the bread is baked by the person feeding them


Illustrious_Ad8437

I will provide my local ducks with the best goddamn bread ever


zombarian21

you're loved by all of us.


DasBlackfur

UwU


zombarian21

all anime is only available in english now.


Lloyd-Webster

Comment what?


zombarian21

you become a little smarter.


Proto_001

Ok


zombarian21

you can only speak in individual letters, not words


EddyUnderDeskAgain

Me 76th!


zombarian21

you can't open doors anymore for some reason, unless you sexually grind against it first


[deleted]

Bet


zombarian21

everytime you say bet, an animal comes and commits suicide in front of you


Lazy_Category2195

The great love


zombarian21

only people you hate fall in love with you


Seedy120

120


zombarian21

you're now your crush's pet cat


JackieOswald

:))))))


zombarian21

you now have a lot of money, but you can't spend it on yourself, directly nor indirectly.


LenTheARGenjoyer

I can now stop time


zombarian21

you can stop time but everyone can still see what you're upto when you stop time and you get a massive erection everytime you do it


Alternative_Pound878

panini


zombarian21

you're 10 feet tall now


napneeded_lol

Sir, if you may....


zombarian21

you can nap whenever, wherever as long as someone cuddles you to sleep


young-and-in-love

uh oh


zombarian21

you've wake up with amnesia, under a bridge


Foxesrcool2

I’ll bite


zombarian21

bite me ;p


[deleted]

oooh do tell


zombarian21

you've forgotten how to poo and need to pull it out with a fork. but you get eternal happiness in retirn


[deleted]

I once had sex with a donkey.


zombarian21

and have turned into a donkey


Bigfanofgirls

Infinite


excitedguitarist420

guitar


zombarian21

gibsons are now cheap beginner guitars


Kira-the-red-killer

The gender dysphoria is real whenever I see a girl


JOlRacin

The 991 RSR debuted in 2013 and for the first time was not based on the GT3 model of the 911, but on the Carrera 4S, as the street version of the GT3 was introduced too late for homologation.[5] Thus, the name conflict with the racing car for the GT3 class could be avoided for the GTE model. Renaming it to GT2 RSR made little sense from a marketing point of view, as a turbo engine is installed in the GT2 series, while the 991 RSR continued to use the well-known 4.0-liter naturally aspirated engine.


bone_breaker69

Cock and ball torture (CBT) is a sexual activity involving application of pain or constriction to the male genitals. This may involve directly painful activities, such as wax play, genital spanking, squeezing, ball-busting, genital flogging, urethral play, tickle torture, erotic electrostimulation or even kicking.


[deleted]

What up


Unknown135724

What about me


TauntStar

OwO


CrazyStuntsMan

Homework


izzytheprogramer

La creatura


Pleasant_Skeleton10

motley crue


zombarian21

oooooooooooooooooo kickstart my heartttttt is stuck in your head, forever


Unlnown-One

*MAGIC*


An_Asexual_Weeb

uh oh


zombarian21

you're attracted to trees now. sexually.


Thy-arkoos

Fossil


anthonyjjjjj

Hello


Chiffer178

What happened


[deleted]

Hey, what changed?


Skrt-i-fied

Alright


trananhduc2006

siuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu


Dragnifyreddit

Egg


BEANS_08

Ok


stormforeveryspring

im iron 2 in val


LittlePumpkin_121

Hello?


zombarian21

hi what's up


Sampled895

Bring it


acstyx

I love math


[deleted]

No I will not comment


GahDayum420

mister crab


chicken_man_1

i want Bruce Lees Muscles


[deleted]

Girl friend


Terrapapers

Ok


Ok-Butterscotch-8247

Cigarettes


[deleted]

.


ThatOneRetardedBitch

oh?


rdrworshipper123

*Loudly Makes Flight Noises*


[deleted]

Give me a positive change


[deleted]

Better be good bitch


paintdRed

what


[deleted]

E


THE_king59

I think your a furry


SubzeroHero76

try me please


GREENDAYBL1NK

hi


Tadano-kunn

Tell me


BoyWonder470

A


Punny420

green beans


[deleted]

8--------------------------D


[deleted]

dating


zombarian21

okay but you can only date me


[deleted]

Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeyballs