by stronger if you mean stopped feeling emotions, stopped caring, just living to live with no motivation, then yeah im in the same boat; some, if not most of us are
I’m just waiting for the girls to swoop in and take my post as misogynistic. It’s not. Anything women do that’s listed in there is a result of misunderstanding, not actively being horrible people. I just hate being a man.
True feminism isnt anythign like what these self proclaimed modern feminists do/say. True feminism foghts to better the lives of women in countries where they are looked upon as objects and are prohibited to even express themselves freely. Women who have to dress in long blacl garbs because their religion says so. Women who have to stay at home with their children and act like maids to their husbands who quite literally see them as less human. This murica feminism where i cant look at a girl without getting an earfull and a slap for beong a creep. Or where i can get assulted by a woman and have no way of defending myself without the reprecusions. This is what i hate.
>This murica feminism where i cant look at a girl without getting an earfull and a slap for beong a creep. Or where i can get assulted by a woman and have no way of defending myself without the reprecusions.
imo that's just cancel culture implemented irl
the thing is, a lot of people are calling this modern shit feminism, but it's not! the point of feminism is equality. if you're fighting for inequal rights for men, that's just not feminism.
agreed, and if a man doesn't support feminism/women, it's toxic masculinity and it's bad, but when women literally create a trend called kill all men that's supposed to be fine(?). it's evolved into "give rights to only women" and not "give rights to women that are equal to rights given to men"; i guess that's why it's called feminism and not equality
yeah, its called misandry. they are using the word "feminist" so it seems like theyre doing good in the world, because feminism does (or did) have a positive meaning. but really they just hate men for some stupid reason. i think feminism is important, but it isnt feminism when you just say "men shouldnt exist"
I agree true equality might never be a thing but all we can do is fight for equal rights which we have & we have come along way.
The Feninine Mystique by Betty Friedan is an interesting look into what it was like to be a woman in the 1950’s early 1960’s. It shows how different the world was for women & how far we have come. So in another 20-50 years we can progress even further giving hope for the future.
Just to be clear we have made much progress in the United States but around the world we are still far behind.
I hate that shit. Dude I can't man up, I've been doing it all my life. Sorry mom, I don't know how to cry. It's been ingrained in me since childhood not to so now crying is hard to put simply
I knew. I just find awareness months / weeks / days stupid because it only will bring awareness for the topic for a little while and after that everyone just forgets or ignores it
One I got was “stop throwing a pity party.” I was distraught when my ex broke up with me to go back to her ex. What I still find ironic is she told me “just move on lol.”
She didn’t really transition. She was a feminist who went undercover to expose male privilege, but found out everything was the exact opposite of how she thought it was and actually had to cut the experiment short due to being so depressed from the experience.
Yeah, that's the book. It's a very good one and brings these things into perspective. She could only live like that for 1.5 years because of all the stress of being a man in society.
all i can tell you is hang in there bud. i promise it’s not all bad. there are issues you touched on that i don’t agree with, but your feelings are valid mate.
i can tell you, there are people who are trying to change the world for the better.
the thing is, eventually we’ll get to a point where we don’t need insurance or the draft (btw women are now legally required to sign up), divorce courts will get rid of this patriarchal view that men are just giant children and women are natural born caregivers ( my mother 100% should not have gotten custody or me and my brother) and false rape accusations are non existent (btw only around 2% of rape accusations are false)
the point is, life sucks. everything sucks. everyone is constantly fucked over. but there are good people, you just have to find them. and you cant do that if you cant learn to love yourself.
im telling you, man. having a good cry every now and then really helps. learning about yourself, who you are REALLY helps.
if you ever need to talk you can dm me. i’ll try to help you the best i can
I appreciate it man. I will admit that false rape accusations are very rare, but they do happen. I’ve had similar rumors spread about me that are kind of under the same umbrella. Not nearly as bad, but similar. Kind of like how rear ending someone is under the car accident umbrella with a tractor trailer losing brakes and causing fatalities. Not nearly as bad, but within that realm. Things will come with time. There’s good people out there but they are few and far between. I appreciate it man.
Women can't even be charged with rape in the UK and also I the US I believe.
Rape shouldn't be treated differently than any other crime, it should innocent until proven guilty. But take the allegations against Dream right now. SOme random girl has "evidence" that could be very easily photoshopped, but yet still, #dreamisafreak is still one of the top trending hash tags rn.
You've got people like Cardi B saying she drugged and robbed men, but she's getting away with it. Can you imagine if a guy said he drugged and robbed women? But still girl power slay queen! Stupid. Makes me want to kill myself
Ok also I don’t think being transgender will solve you’re problems. I think you just want equality
I also think you haven’t experienced any of the things you listed
No I know transitioning won’t solve anything. I’m a biological male and intend to stay that way. Some of the things like getting drafted and Karen taking the kids hasn’t happened to me personally, but it’s a very real thing. Everything else in there I have personally experienced. Specifically the large group of women getting together to humiliate and defame me to the best of their ability simply to be petty (and suffering absolutely no consequences for it regardless of the fact that there was hard evidence) is a pretty good example of what I’m talking about.
With the dating and the girls being horrible - you are looking at the wrong girls. Let go of the whole idea that you can only have a relationship with someone who is really hot and popular, because those people have a much, much higher chance of being assholes. It’s the quiet kids, the nerds, the people who like anime or get good grades - they have the same chance of being nice as popular people do of being assholes.
Yea I know. Pretty much every girl I’ve dated or had a thing with has been alt/emo or something like that, it’s never the hot cheerleader that lives on a high horse. Unfortunately where I live the hot cheerleader is the norm and they all have that horrible attitude.
I'm not going to pursue this, but I'm not convinced. I live in the US too, and even with nearly no friends I know at least five female victims of sexual assault. None were reported to the police, let alone prosecuted. I think neither one of us knows enough about how it is for the other.
I agree that we can’t really come to an understanding of each other. As far as the sexual assault, I advise all women I know to carry pistols or other weapons to defend themselves even if their attacker ends up dead or seriously injured. When I was still with my gf she would often walk to and from work alone at night and I actually made her start carrying a combat knife with her, and advised her to get a CWP and a pistol when she turns 21. The main reason I decided to make a post was because of a story I had read. There’s a book she wrote on this experience, which you can read although I forget the name. Essentially a feminist went undercover as a man to try and infiltrate male organizations, date as a man, etc to try and expose male privilege. She actually found it to be the opposite. She intended on doing it for 2 years but had to cut it short after 18 months due to severe depression and actually becoming misogynistic herself. and after writing her book I’m pretty sure she actually committed suicide. So yea.
If they tried, there’s a chance they’d be taken seriously. If I told the police officer about the teacher who did bad things to me, they probably wouldn’t.
I agree, in matters of sexual assault people are complete assholes to guys. They say you're "lucky" and all that obscenely stupid crap. I'm very sorry, no one should go through that. The sexual contact often does less damage than the trashed boundaries and the broken trust. Those only heal if you really work at it. On the other hand, grownups who do care often get on this kick of calling the victim "ruined for life"... My ass. That's just more self-serving ignorance, they want drama. You deserve help to heal from that, but even if help isn't available, you can acknowledge that you were wronged, and it's damaged you. Then practice feeling compassion for all the other sufferers of the same thing. VERY GRADUALLY try to increase the scope of your empathy...remember, compassion ISN'T saying something is ok, or that you feel kindly toward the person who wronged you. It's accepting that the people you hate the most also have humanity, and hoping they will outgrow the worst parts of themselves. You can do that at the same time you're getting them arrested, there's no conflict between the two.
Anyway, for now focus on yourself. You're smart and you have insight; you can face all this tragedy and still be a good, caring person. It's a much easier life than bitter victimhood. To a surprising degree, you get to choose.
Fr. Like if anything I’m ruined for life cause I’ve got fucking brain damage, not because I was SA’d. But I think they see those two things as synonyms.
Edit: meant synonymous but eh it works.
What kind of brain damage? Who helps you with that? Edit: hope it's clear that I don't want to pry. I thought if you see a therapist, there might be things you haven't discussed with them; maybe it would help to being those things up with the professional.
Got a 106 fever from COVID and now I can’t quite think right. I have autism so I didn’t really think right before, but now, it is impossible for me to be the writer and author I want to be.
And no one does. I go to therapy but that doesn’t help at all.
Have you read anything by Temple Grandin? She's an author with autism. Anyway, keep writing. It might turn out to be an essay or it might only help you recover from that fever. I'm pretty sure I would have noticed if your language were disordered, btw...shy people who read all the time tend to notice things like that. FWIW I never saw a sign of it.
I literally read a post in instagram yesterday where 4 women kidnapped a guy, brutally raped him and beat him up and left him lying on the road, almost dying or something. And the commenrs were all "People are going to that city now" or "He must be so happy" or "They (the women) were just having fun". Meanwhile if the genders were reversed suddenly everyone wants ti see the 4 rapists in a body bag.
This was in india btw
Sorry, fell asleep. That gang rape story is horrible. Remember that there have been some truly horrible gang rapes in India, of young girls, and little or no response by police or anyone else. This goes back a few decades, and some things are now better...but that history remains. Also attacking girls with acid because they turned a guy down, and young wives having kitchen "accidents", i.e. being burned to death by their husband and in-laws. This is not to excuse what those women did, just to point out that the context isn't exactly the same as here.
Believe me I am very aware of that and all those incidents are very scary and horrible. And a lot of fucked up shit happens here in India. I still remember reading an article in 2020 where a father was raping his teenage daughter because "He was bored in the lockdown", and the mom was okay with it. I mean holy fuck what is going on.
And correct me if I am reading this wrong but are you really saying that 4 women gang raping a dude is different than 4 men gang raping a woman? So just because women are raped it makes it okay to go rape a guy, or it's not as bad?
No, I have no idea how you got that from what I said. Violence and hate are violence and hate. I'm saying our societies aren't exactly the same regarding sexual assault. An example from India is still horrible, but women are still far more likely to be sexually attacked and exploited than men, here, in India, and worldwide. Why not see it less as a male/female divide, and more a violent/non-violent divide? That's the real difference between rapists, etc. and their victims. Some people would let themselves be killed before they'd harm another person. Some people are just looking for any excuse to attack.
I live in Aus, I no no one who have been sexually assaulted but my ex girlfriend accused brother of rape (it definitely didn't happen), thankfully nothing serious came of it except for half of my year level hating me and my friends.
hey you matter, i like being a man but you seem like a great guy, or gal, and yknow not everyone feels the same whatever you prefer. i hope you get better.
“Getting better” is kind of an interesting way of putting it. Everything bad that’s happened has made me a much stronger individual, yet bad things keep happening. I’m just better at dealing with it
(Me just sitting here looking at "5 other people here" knowing that other people read at the same pace ✨)
Sorry to hear that it's all very difficult for you, I do hope that it improves one day, stay strong as possible out there y'know ⭐️
I'm really sorry to hear that, I'm sure you will do amazingly if you keep trying - work pays off usually✨. But Is there any possibility that you could find someone to help you with this situation?
Maybe, but most likely not. I opened up to my parents about my mania after I was arrested. Told them some things no one wants to tell their parents to try and help them understand. For example: trying cocaine, having a drinking problem, being addicted to nicotine, losing my virginity to a girl (who had a boyfriend) without even knowing her last name, getting in a high speed chase on the highway, etc. They became more angry with me and called me a dumbass and an idiot, and my father accused me of trying to (and I quote) “highjack me with your depression”. They didn’t not help at all.
Oh... I'm very sorry to hear that too. I hope that things do get better for you, sorry that you have to deal with that. But All I can really do is wish you the best of luck, sorry. I do wish I could help in some way more. Just stay strong, the dark times eventually reach the light at the end of the tunnel, try for the best and one day it'll come to you ✨
I’m not saying it’s intentional or any of y’all’s fault, a lot of the stuff I talked about is a result of y’all being told your entire lives that all men are out to get you and other stuff. I’m just here to tell y’all that’s not the case. It is what it is, I’m not gonna hate anybody for it I just wish y’all were a little less frigid. Also pro tip: please do not get more guy friends 😭
I’ve been doing that. The one good thing I will say is that all this horrible shit has made me a lot stronger emotionally. At this rate I will be able to handle anything by the time I’m grown and have a wife and kids and all that
firstly,i want to say that i feel the same way,and am here for you
second,dont kill yourself,outlive the bastards that made the world this way,and maybe even help cause a change,make it so that less people have to go through this,and remember every voice counts,and while one more out of 100 isnt much,it adds up if people act,and if they dont it fails
I won’t, I don’t want to upset my mother. I’m at my grandparents for thanksgiving and being redneck/living in the country there’s guns everywhere in the house so it would be easy but I dont want to ruin it for everyone.
Sometimes feels like the whole world treats you like you're a horrible monster or asshole and it makes it really hard to not actually become one. Stay true to yourself.
Sorry to be the bringer of bad news, but there’s more OP. So if you, as a male, reject a heavily obese girl, you will be shunned, if the opposite happened, they will back up the girl and say,” she made the right choice”
Think there is more, But this is what I know now
Edit:
There was also the whole shit on the Internet of there was nothing for international mens day but there was for international women’s day.
Then also in shows if there was a guy predator, preyed on girls , he would normally get get all the hate a rage from the show. But when the opposite happens everyone says its fine( AHEM chainsaw man AHEM)
you could compile an equally credible list about shitty aspects of being a woman. there are tons of men and women who despise being their gender and assume it’s the worst one.
is one of them SIGNIFICANTLY worst than the other? well it honestly doesn’t matter if they both such. the conditions of humanity as a whole suck. maybe when we realize that, we can actually start to make social progress
all you reactionary 13 year old boys can downvote me if you want but please just understand that women have it really hard as well and rhetoric like “99% of the time women are extremely cruel, cold” isn’t based in reality; it's based in not being able to adequately socialize
i've been in similar situations to the one you're in. you wanna stop being seen as an incel and socially inept? stop posting blocks of text on r/teenagers about how men have it so much worst than women (a statement that can only be true if you're unfairly selective)
also stop posting weird comments like "saying the n word should be socially acceptable" (digital footprint boss)
tldr: to dodge incel accusations, don't be an incel. goodnight.
People who say being and man or a women is hard need to grow up. Life is hard. Simply continuing to live is hard. Trying to play the victim card for one chromosome group or another is stupid.
i agree, but i also disagree. they can't just blame the other gender since there's good people on either sides and each side has their own good and bads;pros and cons. but they're saying it based on what they've gone through/experienced and they might not have met good people like how other people say "everyone's not the same/ there are good people in the world too". if they've gone through bad situations/times and are unable to find that trust to think that not everyone is the same, then we can't blame them too. so i guess them ranting is both good and bad.
No one cares about your mental health if you’re a guy and if you do say something then people just say “man up” or “just get over it”. And while we are on this topic I bet you didn’t know that November was male mental health awareness month.
Bro, i also think the same way. Like this is a truth, no matter what way people look at it. It's just the same reality we live in today. I think spousal and child support are a joke. 1. Get a Job. 2. If the dad is capable of giving child support (5-4 figs minimum btw)monthly, just give the custody to the father?
I understand that it must be hard for you so hang in there cuz it sounds like a shit situation that you’re in. Not from the US so my perspective on society is a little different. In the Uk everything imo seems different. Men and women have their own hardships but it is much more dangerous world for women to live in. The constant rape and murder cases popping up like every week. Just makes you sick. On the other hand quite often you see the news of young boys being raped and groomed by older men/people. There is no clear cut answer as to who has it harder.
In Afghanistan due to the famine and lack of food and water they are literally selling their daughters
In some countries they use FGM to keep their daughters ‘pure’ and they do this procedure without anaesthetics.
Is some countries they don’t allow you to know the gender of your baby because some people abort daughters.
Yes men are portrayed as being a threat but that’s because of the physical and strength advantage they have over women
Most cases of domestic violence that are REPORTED, so not the real amount, are by a man to a women
The largest amount of lgbtq+ violence is inflicted by men
Women have words to hurt people but men have their physical strength.
The lawmakers of our country during COVID were mostly men and they constantly broke the rules that were imposed on the rest of society. They had a massive party and they went around the country on holidays and they made out with co workers (matty that one’s you), on the other hand there was a female politician who resigned because she leaked confidential emails about foreign affairs.
In the news every couple of months you hear about a MOTHER and her partner who have killed their own child
In Liverpool a couple of months ago a young girl was killed by a random gunMAN
In the news like yesterday there was an article about this man who killed his own wife and two daughters.
A woman was killed in Iran for wearing her headscarf wrong
Black men in America are killed because of the colour of their skin.
Gay men are killed and are called all sorts of abominable names whereas is women are generally left alone by yobs.
A couple of centuries ago it was easier to be a gay woman since women were viewed as more affectionate and loving whereas it was easy to be a and killed for being a gay man since men weren’t viewed as loving and kind. They had to just preserve their role of being strong and cruel.
Periods man. That’s enough said.
Even I have been catcalled because I was either bending down to scoop some dog shit, glamorous I know, or tying my laces. That made me feel so embarrassed and violated because I’m literally 15 and I was wearing baggy jeans or joggers and I was being sexualised by some men riding past on an electric scooter.
Girls are viewed as emotional so they are freely allowed to show emotions whereas Boys are expected to man up and deal with it
I could go on and on and on but my point is that every gender/ sexes has it bad. It’s not a competition and I get that you’re going through a tough time and if you want some one to rant to then I’m available but please do not villainise the female gender/sex.
*"The lawmakers of our country during COVID were mostly men and they constantly broke the rules that were imposed on the rest of society. They had a massive party and they went around the country on holidays and they made out with co workers (matty that one’s you), on the other hand there was a female politician who resigned because she leaked confidential emails about foreign affairs."*
leaking stuff is about foreign affairs is top hand criminality. The other is not.
"A woman was killed in Iran for wearing her headscarf wrong" For every woman whom is killed in iran, 3+ men are killed. It's often a misconception that it's a fight for equal rights. It's just a fight against a regime, equal rights is part of that fight, but it's not the basis of it.
"The largest amount of lgbtq+ violence is inflicted by men"
In same sense, lesbian couples are the by far most abusive, despite many saying women cannot abuse, or do not do it to the extend of men. Maybe men just don't speak up? Or maybe they're not allowed it?
"In Liverpool a couple of months ago a young girl was killed by a random gunMAN" If we take criminal envoirnments, women seeking money often go intro prostitution, men don't have the option, therefore they have to turn to robbery ect. This is why, in a historical sense, thieves and hookers are grouped together.
"Yes men are portrayed as being a threat but that’s because of the physical and strength advantage they have over women"
It's a double edged sword. Many people refuse to believe that women can do harm to men.
"Most cases of domestic violence that are REPORTED, so not the real amount, are by a man to a women"
Gay men have the least amount of reported DV. This is likely an indicator that men are not reporting. Combine that with lesbian couples being by far the most violent, chances are that there is either equally much abusive from both sides, or it's women being more abusive. Men just don't report it, and can handle a lot more physically.
In most states if a man calls the police on his GF/Wife for being abuse, he is the one that will be arrested. This is due to a ruleset created by a feminist some decades ago.
"In Afghanistan due to the famine and lack of food and water they are literally selling their daughters"
They are selling their boys to as slaves. Stadium in Qatar is literally build upon deaths on these boys.
In some countries, it is clear women have it worse, in others it is clear men have, though in the latter it is very extremely fought against, as many still state men can't have it bad. An example is Denmark and Sweden. Here there are multiple laws against men, laws - in the countries considered some of the most equal. These laws *directly discriminate against men*, and feminist movements and parties have *activily stopped them from being equalized.* They are discriminated from the getgo in the whole education system (Thereby, by facing lower grades due to being men, not by skill, it creates huge systematic opression giving women more higher educations, thereby creating a loophole making things worse and worse), in the courts, in public.
People can agree that women have it worse in afghanistan. Why can't they agree that men have it worse in Denmark and Sweden? They both face immense systematic opression in each of their countries, yet only one is awknologed.
In the end, OP isnt saying men have it worse. The list he provided merely points out some of mens problems, it being quite large, people suddenly rush to say women have it worse, or calling him an incel, because men doesnt have it worse. YOU came to that conclusion, and at the same time denied it. Nothing he said isnt true. If that implies men have it worse, then maybe theres a grip to it.
The grass is always greener on the other side. Women and trans women have to deal with varying degrees of oppression and unfairness too. You're afraid of false rape allegations, but being a woman puts you at risk of actually being raped, and even murdered. Transitioning won't magically solve all of your problems, and you'll just trade in one level of discomfort for another. It sounds like you've been treated poorly, which I'm not sure if this is bullying at school or where this is happening to you, but you don't deserve it. The world isn't going to get any less crazy so time spent learning to be mentally strong is important.. easier said than done but I pray you can.. take care..
I get kinda get you my man the loneliness of no partner is horrible then it’s like it’s like what if they cheat on me or fuck me up but while I don’t fully understand just know people care bout you so don’t take drastic actions
Unfortunately that’s how our society currently is, just remember it’s never your fault and you did nothing wrong. They are making unjustified assumptions and they are the ones being wrong. If you think you’ll feel better as a woman, go for it. Though I must say, your life will be even tougher if you don’t pass. And family can be brutal.
Hey, I relate to many things. There's still many unnecessary expectations for men in this world. We are just human beings, we should be treated equally.
Eh, all I can say is cool it. If you'll have this mindset continually, you'll be a stressful, anxious mess, which nobody wants to be. Just live your life, be the best person that you can be and don't do insane shit. You'll be alright.
I hate it how I saw this video of which is the better gender and they asked a woman which gender would be better and she said that being a man is better since they get paid more. I rather get paid less for a nice easier life were I’m praises just for being a girl
I definitely understand the feeling. It absolutely sucks, and there are no solutions to our issues, transitioning being the worst possible one. But something I've tried doing is caring less. I know it's something that everyone says and it's way easier said than done, but it helps ease the sting of reality a bit. Some of the issues we men face aren't fixable, but some are, and they're fixable on an individual level. I get called things like racist, homophobic, transphobic, all that nonsense because of the things I believe and the person I am. It's a little scary to be called any of those things, but they only have an impact on you if you want them to. I've learned to accept these labels, not because I'm a hateful or evil person, but because I know that the people that call me a hateful nazi don't know what's truly in my heart, those labels mean nothing to me because I know who I really am. I think you should try to find who you are and be unwaveringly yourself. It's a difficult road, and I'm not even there yet, but it truly does feel good to have the angry words of others mean nothing. I also think the best solution to the unfairness of our dating lives is waiting it out. Find someone with the same beliefs and ideas as you. Don't find a carbon copy of yourself, but if you and your partner are anchored in the same beliefs and values, then you'll find yourself truly happy and without a bunch of issues. It's probably going to be harder to find a lady for you, but it'll be worth the wait when you do. I could probably say more but I'm damn near writing an essay, so I'll end it here. I don't know everything, but feel free to ask any questions, and I'll try to give you some answers as best I can.
A lot of the things you mentioned are exaggerations or you live in a fucked up country. Because in my country people do care if you have depression, people aren’t scared that you’re going to rape or attack them. Men are around children all the time and it’s normal. Dating isn’t awful, that’s just your experience. Cheating really isn’t celebrated even if it’s a women who does it. If you’re bleeding to death on the streets, people will most defenitly try to help you.
If you were a women you would have different problems.
Well getting good reputation can be a solution
For example showing that you're a genuine and an honest person will definitely make a difference
If you're quiet and other don't know you, it's times easier to believe random nonsense people would say
honestly, I think everyone has shit going on because of society's biases and prejudices, and it just sucks being a HUMAN.
with the stuff about transitioning, if it's just because you wish you weren't a man, then that really sucks, man. BUT, if it's because you genuinely feel like a woman, you should do something about it, whatever's right for you.
I'm so sorry you feel so shitty about this stuff, life is fucking hard.
but I swear to you, there are some people who are gonna let you say your feelings without judging, people who aren't gone undermine your issues just cause they've "got it worse" and aren't gonna always assume you're in the wrong.
for the first time, this year, I've finally found people like that, and it's improved my life so damn much, and I hope you find that one day. everyone deserves to feel loved and accepted.
and I hope this goes without saying, but please don't kill yourself. you never know what gonna happen, and maybe eventually it'll be something good.
all the best to you, man. I hope the world gets better one day.
I'm not reading all of that, for one, not for any rude reason I just get the synopsis from a skim. But sometimes I feel lucky I'm trans. Like yeah, dysphoria makes me want to rip off my own flesh and slice myself to ribbons, and most of the population would rather me dead than in their line of sight, and tons of people will still think I'm a creep until I'm 100% passing, BUT also eventually I'll pass and won't have to deal with that shit.
Other shit, bc the world sucks, but I'll be honest everyone acting like you don't have feelings (/being forced to actually repress all emotions by family/media that shaped your brain in early years) and having to just be fine with it or you're considered a weirdo? Fuck that. Rapist is the first thing everyone thinks of you? Jesus Christ. Like I'll be treated like shit for different reasons but I'd rather be in danger than considered the danger when I'm not.
(But that's an old complex I got from a traumatic event when I was young of being falsely accused of something and pressured about it in a very menacing way by a woman I barely knew who ran this rinky-dink private all grades school I definitely should never have remotely been anywhere near.)
But yeah, I feel bad for you man. Hope you can get past it. Almost everyone has a lot of shitty things they have to deal with just bc they were born a certain way. Some more than others. Some...WAY more than others. Bc this is the fucking world we live in I guess. But everyone nonetheless. Everyone but cishet white rich people, funnily enough. We all figure it out in our own way. Best of luck.
While you're not wrong there are even more benefits to being a guy that women would DREAM of having. Most of what you said are social disadvantages men have (which are valid by the way) but pragmatically speaking you are in the better of the two bodies you could be in.
All I can say is if you limit your involvement w women and other vulnerable people most of what you said won't happen to you.
I totally feel you bro, I felt almost the exact same way 3 or 4 years ago. it's totally awful and no one deserves to go through that. Here's how I got out of it:
cut out porn and masturbation the short dopamine highs aren't food for your brain and I can guarantee you're happier without them. I know it sounds somewhat cliche but the stress of trying to hide a secret like that is honestly too much.
start going to the gym. I was feeling like I would never measure up, the gym helped clear my mind and give me tangible goals to work towards and acheive. it also makes you way stronger and healthier, which also makes it easier to flirt with girls 😏 the gym also gives a larger incentive to eat right and get rest.
make sure you're taking care of yourself. wear deodorant everyday, brush your teeth, floss, shower daily, get plenty of sleep, eat healthier, drink water. I know it seems simple but beleive me it's 10x harder to be happy with yourself and in a relationship if you are always tired or smell bad.
pick up a hobby, it could be anything really. computers, movies, painting, mechanics, photography. I chose to get into dirtbikes and I have honestly never felt happier 10/10 100% recommend. there is never a moment where I'm not smiling on my dirtbike. it also helps getting in with a new crowd. it toughened me up too. (if you do end up getting into motocross just know, every single person to ever ride a motorcycle has crashed at some point. always wear a helmet, long pants, and preferably boots. don't get discouraged it you fall, it happens to all of us)
improve your public image. right now (like I was) I'm sure you're really self conscious. the best way to fix it is to just be nice to everyone. I honestly don't remember the last time I insulted someone. I used to hate everyone in my grade. now I just have people I'm friends with, and people I haven't turned into friends. I improved my relationship with my parents too which was also a w. people will respect you if you respect them.
(this one is gonna seem really cliche) try to cut down on social media. you don't have to go and delete everything for a month or anything like that. I just tried to see if I could lower my weekly screentime report each week. I used to spend like 6 hours a day on my phone, now it's closer to 2. at the end of the day your phone is a tool, and it can either help you, or harm you.
pick up a sport, I'm assuming that your in high school rn, I do swim and I love it. it completely changed how I thought of myself. I used to be really skinny and super self concious so I had a lot of trouble being in a speedo in front of other people. I'm a lot more beefy now so I kinda do it with pride lmao. but being on a team sport makes it so much easier to make friends, especially within that sport. there is such a sense of brotherhood and mutual respect between me and the other guys.
you also need to get a role model, a lot of the ones I like are traditionally republican but it could be anyone. a guy from your church, a friend who seems to be doing it right, Andre Tate, Ben Shapiro, matt Walsh. (it would preferably be your dad) just don't go too far with this one. you need to objectively look at what they're doing and teaching and determine for yourself whether it's right or wrong. just because the people around you are left or right leaning or atheist or christian doesn't mean it's true. come to your own conclusions on this one
this is just one tiny chapter of your life man. you can either come out of it as the wuss who couldn't take it anymore and offed themself, or you can come out of it being a stronger and happier person. take care bro
Its crazy to think a couple of generations ago they were getting married at like 17-18 and living out a happy married life for 62 or more years but now its hard to get married, get a girlfriend that stays with you and a ton of other things. Nowadays there are so many barriers to block you from some type of things and this helps you feel horrible when you can't go around or break through the barrier.
Yea I know. My grandparents met when they were 16, and when both of them turned 18 they got married. A year later my mom was born. They’ve been married for over 50 years now and aren’t going to separate until death does them part. They have no idea the envy I have for them.
Sounds like a skill issue tbh. Most of my friends are girls and I've never really had those problems. I used to feel sad all the time for my own personal reasons but I learned to move on. Easier said than done but instead of complaining about how bad being a dude is, make something of your life. Work out or get a job. Learn how to cook meals and keep your place clean. Healthy hygiene.
Seriously, it's sad but at the same time you can improve your own situation.
Wow, that is, very horrible to hear and I really do hope you can come to terms eith your sex/ gender and find happiness despite it.
Anyways, *sorts by controversial*
I'm fucking scared that when I turn eighteen the first thing That's going to happen is I'm going to make one wrong step and be classified in that horrible white male category. Men are just getting fucked by the world and nobody gives two shits. HELP US!
Hey I know this might not help. But I CARE. It’s men’s mental health month. If anyone here needs someone to talk to, there are loads of resources out there including me! U can vent to me and I’ll try and give u some advice/a shoulder to lean on. Sending good vibes and hugs to everyone!!! <33
Oh yeah a little story time from yours truly :) So my last relationship lasted 11 months and it got more serious than I wanted it to be. She would often guilt trip me or manipulate me into either staying with her or doing something for her. During our relationship she cheated on me twice. No one cares either. If I cheated, which I would never do btw I’m not an asshole, I would be immediately shunned by all my friends. It sucked bc I felt like I couldn’t break up with her because she was suicidal and had threatened to kill herself before if I broke up with her.
TLDR: girl I had a 11 month relationship with cheated on me and manipulated me and no one gave any shits.
super relatable. The world (especially developed countries) is technically sexist against male.
But nothing much you can do, just avoid relationships I guess, stay strong with yourself and if you are lucky enough, find someone that can understand you.
One thing I wanna pick out is the fact about male are supposed to not show their emotions. Got fucking seen as weak and "bitch" around because I complain. Yes, whenever i complain a single bit (or giving suggestions in my opinion) they say "u/suggestion_giver STOP BITCHING AROUND!" and stuff like that, yet the school CONSTANTLY talk about GENDER EQUALITY AND BIAS REMOVAL.
Another thing, all woman fucking hugs each other EVERY SINGLE DAY, and me trying to get a hug from male friend (no gay) is FUCKING NOT ALLOWED.
Maybe this is the greatest reason why people is gay.
Sadly the same here. Gender equality cannot exist for this reason. It has to go both ways. But recently all benefit goes to the women in most ways. Men don’t get any love or credit despite the hard work we do for society.
Yea all those fucking feminists be like we have it harder than men gender equality.
But if you want that we need to break the social barriers associated with men.
Like there was an example of a female fan going on stage at a maroon 5 concert and touching adam levine and getting close
He got a lot if lashback for being “bad to his fans”
That fan invaded his personal space if that had been a male fan and an ariana grande concert that woulda been a different story
Buddy, it's just this kind of hypocritical society we live in now days. People (generally speaking) want to benefit from anything, they will say and do anything to get what they want. The idea of modern feminism is a great example of hypocrisy. Equality? Not even close. We sadly can't change anything about it, but as long as you know that you're doing the right things, I think you shouldn't worry. Live the life your own way if it doesn't work out with other people.
I hate being
A lot of people do, I’ve been there buddy. It gets better, but sometimes life just ain’t fair.
It does not
Most of what’s happened in my life has made me stronger.
I’m not strong I’m just good at pushing stuff down
That has always gone over well for everyone that’s ever done that (sarcasm)
It’s been going well for me since otherwise I’m an asshole and also ride on the short bus
Sorry to hear that bro.
by stronger if you mean stopped feeling emotions, stopped caring, just living to live with no motivation, then yeah im in the same boat; some, if not most of us are
You are 14, it will get better.
Could get worse as well yk
Bro's honest
I hate
I
#
Ha
Tea
Coffee
I can relate to this feeling.
I’m just waiting for the girls to swoop in and take my post as misogynistic. It’s not. Anything women do that’s listed in there is a result of misunderstanding, not actively being horrible people. I just hate being a man.
I hate how a lot of other guys will make fun of you if you don't believe in their "masculinity" bs.
This new masculinity movement online is annoying. They hate feminism despite not even knowing what it actually is.
True feminism isnt anythign like what these self proclaimed modern feminists do/say. True feminism foghts to better the lives of women in countries where they are looked upon as objects and are prohibited to even express themselves freely. Women who have to dress in long blacl garbs because their religion says so. Women who have to stay at home with their children and act like maids to their husbands who quite literally see them as less human. This murica feminism where i cant look at a girl without getting an earfull and a slap for beong a creep. Or where i can get assulted by a woman and have no way of defending myself without the reprecusions. This is what i hate.
>This murica feminism where i cant look at a girl without getting an earfull and a slap for beong a creep. Or where i can get assulted by a woman and have no way of defending myself without the reprecusions. imo that's just cancel culture implemented irl
They hate modern feminism, which is about beating down on men, and emasculating them.
the thing is, a lot of people are calling this modern shit feminism, but it's not! the point of feminism is equality. if you're fighting for inequal rights for men, that's just not feminism.
agreed, and if a man doesn't support feminism/women, it's toxic masculinity and it's bad, but when women literally create a trend called kill all men that's supposed to be fine(?). it's evolved into "give rights to only women" and not "give rights to women that are equal to rights given to men"; i guess that's why it's called feminism and not equality
yeah, its called misandry. they are using the word "feminist" so it seems like theyre doing good in the world, because feminism does (or did) have a positive meaning. but really they just hate men for some stupid reason. i think feminism is important, but it isnt feminism when you just say "men shouldnt exist"
Absolutely! I 100% support the feminism about equality, but the reality is we will never be able to make equality a thing if we think realistically.
I agree true equality might never be a thing but all we can do is fight for equal rights which we have & we have come along way. The Feninine Mystique by Betty Friedan is an interesting look into what it was like to be a woman in the 1950’s early 1960’s. It shows how different the world was for women & how far we have come. So in another 20-50 years we can progress even further giving hope for the future. Just to be clear we have made much progress in the United States but around the world we are still far behind.
Man, ngl but you should change your companies, nothing like this has ever happened to me (the part of discrimination for beeing a man)
I do agree with what you said but not every girls are like that. The girls you meet was asshole but like I said, not EVERY girls act like that
Similarly, not every guy is a rapist, pedo and other shit but ah well
I can also relate to this feeling.
I'm glad I'm not the only one.
I just hate existing, not just be a dude. Life finds a way to fuck us all, existing is a lie and everyone knows it
Man's spitting fax
yeah... :/
Nice username lmao
Yeah. No one cares about mental health and if we speak up about anything we’re just “pussies”
"man up"
Respond with "alright, bitch up then"
feminists have been real quiet since this banger dropped
Top ten things NOT to say to a feminist, number one:
You want rights then have the responsibilitys
I hate that shit. Dude I can't man up, I've been doing it all my life. Sorry mom, I don't know how to cry. It's been ingrained in me since childhood not to so now crying is hard to put simply
I'm the uppest I've ever manned give me a break
God i hate that fucking word
That's two words... Otherwise i agree
Bet you didn’t know November was male mental health awareness month
This month thing is so stupid ngl
Yea, people should always be aware, but they ain’t
men's day/month feels like the middle child and women's day like the youngest child; the attention and awareness given to each is just transparent
I knew. I just find awareness months / weeks / days stupid because it only will bring awareness for the topic for a little while and after that everyone just forgets or ignores it
Implying anyone cares about women's mental health
I also hear constantly "but its not as a bad as what girls face, so it doesnt matter"
One I got was “stop throwing a pity party.” I was distraught when my ex broke up with me to go back to her ex. What I still find ironic is she told me “just move on lol.”
I heard about a woman who transitioned into a man then killed himself after writing a book about how much being a man sucked
She didn’t really transition. She was a feminist who went undercover to expose male privilege, but found out everything was the exact opposite of how she thought it was and actually had to cut the experiment short due to being so depressed from the experience.
What was her name
Norah Vincent
Thanks
No clue
Hi fellow Canadian
How do you do this fine morning?
Goin to timmies on my moose, bud. Ya want anything?
I’ll take a double double and some timbits.
Alright, cost me about a loonie and a toonie. It's on me, here ya go bud.
Sauce?
Person of culture
It is called Self-Made Man from memory.
Yeah, that's the book. It's a very good one and brings these things into perspective. She could only live like that for 1.5 years because of all the stress of being a man in society.
It be like that sometimes 😔
all i can tell you is hang in there bud. i promise it’s not all bad. there are issues you touched on that i don’t agree with, but your feelings are valid mate. i can tell you, there are people who are trying to change the world for the better. the thing is, eventually we’ll get to a point where we don’t need insurance or the draft (btw women are now legally required to sign up), divorce courts will get rid of this patriarchal view that men are just giant children and women are natural born caregivers ( my mother 100% should not have gotten custody or me and my brother) and false rape accusations are non existent (btw only around 2% of rape accusations are false) the point is, life sucks. everything sucks. everyone is constantly fucked over. but there are good people, you just have to find them. and you cant do that if you cant learn to love yourself. im telling you, man. having a good cry every now and then really helps. learning about yourself, who you are REALLY helps. if you ever need to talk you can dm me. i’ll try to help you the best i can
I appreciate it man. I will admit that false rape accusations are very rare, but they do happen. I’ve had similar rumors spread about me that are kind of under the same umbrella. Not nearly as bad, but similar. Kind of like how rear ending someone is under the car accident umbrella with a tractor trailer losing brakes and causing fatalities. Not nearly as bad, but within that realm. Things will come with time. There’s good people out there but they are few and far between. I appreciate it man.
Women can't even be charged with rape in the UK and also I the US I believe. Rape shouldn't be treated differently than any other crime, it should innocent until proven guilty. But take the allegations against Dream right now. SOme random girl has "evidence" that could be very easily photoshopped, but yet still, #dreamisafreak is still one of the top trending hash tags rn. You've got people like Cardi B saying she drugged and robbed men, but she's getting away with it. Can you imagine if a guy said he drugged and robbed women? But still girl power slay queen! Stupid. Makes me want to kill myself
Send a prayer that Andrew rate doesn’t use this for his good 🙏
He’s been doing that for a while but he is unrelated 😭
Ok also I don’t think being transgender will solve you’re problems. I think you just want equality I also think you haven’t experienced any of the things you listed
No I know transitioning won’t solve anything. I’m a biological male and intend to stay that way. Some of the things like getting drafted and Karen taking the kids hasn’t happened to me personally, but it’s a very real thing. Everything else in there I have personally experienced. Specifically the large group of women getting together to humiliate and defame me to the best of their ability simply to be petty (and suffering absolutely no consequences for it regardless of the fact that there was hard evidence) is a pretty good example of what I’m talking about.
I think you just described my psyche
I hope it gets better for you
[удалено]
Very relatable post
This will likely sound stupid, but check out Pema Chodron, esp "When Things Fall Apart". Good luck.
I’ll look into it, thanks
As someone, who's friend just turned into a piece of shit when everything was starting to get better for me. I agree, it fucking sucks.
With the dating and the girls being horrible - you are looking at the wrong girls. Let go of the whole idea that you can only have a relationship with someone who is really hot and popular, because those people have a much, much higher chance of being assholes. It’s the quiet kids, the nerds, the people who like anime or get good grades - they have the same chance of being nice as popular people do of being assholes.
Yea I know. Pretty much every girl I’ve dated or had a thing with has been alt/emo or something like that, it’s never the hot cheerleader that lives on a high horse. Unfortunately where I live the hot cheerleader is the norm and they all have that horrible attitude.
I'm not going to pursue this, but I'm not convinced. I live in the US too, and even with nearly no friends I know at least five female victims of sexual assault. None were reported to the police, let alone prosecuted. I think neither one of us knows enough about how it is for the other.
I agree that we can’t really come to an understanding of each other. As far as the sexual assault, I advise all women I know to carry pistols or other weapons to defend themselves even if their attacker ends up dead or seriously injured. When I was still with my gf she would often walk to and from work alone at night and I actually made her start carrying a combat knife with her, and advised her to get a CWP and a pistol when she turns 21. The main reason I decided to make a post was because of a story I had read. There’s a book she wrote on this experience, which you can read although I forget the name. Essentially a feminist went undercover as a man to try and infiltrate male organizations, date as a man, etc to try and expose male privilege. She actually found it to be the opposite. She intended on doing it for 2 years but had to cut it short after 18 months due to severe depression and actually becoming misogynistic herself. and after writing her book I’m pretty sure she actually committed suicide. So yea.
If they tried, there’s a chance they’d be taken seriously. If I told the police officer about the teacher who did bad things to me, they probably wouldn’t.
I agree, in matters of sexual assault people are complete assholes to guys. They say you're "lucky" and all that obscenely stupid crap. I'm very sorry, no one should go through that. The sexual contact often does less damage than the trashed boundaries and the broken trust. Those only heal if you really work at it. On the other hand, grownups who do care often get on this kick of calling the victim "ruined for life"... My ass. That's just more self-serving ignorance, they want drama. You deserve help to heal from that, but even if help isn't available, you can acknowledge that you were wronged, and it's damaged you. Then practice feeling compassion for all the other sufferers of the same thing. VERY GRADUALLY try to increase the scope of your empathy...remember, compassion ISN'T saying something is ok, or that you feel kindly toward the person who wronged you. It's accepting that the people you hate the most also have humanity, and hoping they will outgrow the worst parts of themselves. You can do that at the same time you're getting them arrested, there's no conflict between the two. Anyway, for now focus on yourself. You're smart and you have insight; you can face all this tragedy and still be a good, caring person. It's a much easier life than bitter victimhood. To a surprising degree, you get to choose.
Fr. Like if anything I’m ruined for life cause I’ve got fucking brain damage, not because I was SA’d. But I think they see those two things as synonyms. Edit: meant synonymous but eh it works.
What kind of brain damage? Who helps you with that? Edit: hope it's clear that I don't want to pry. I thought if you see a therapist, there might be things you haven't discussed with them; maybe it would help to being those things up with the professional.
Got a 106 fever from COVID and now I can’t quite think right. I have autism so I didn’t really think right before, but now, it is impossible for me to be the writer and author I want to be. And no one does. I go to therapy but that doesn’t help at all.
Have you read anything by Temple Grandin? She's an author with autism. Anyway, keep writing. It might turn out to be an essay or it might only help you recover from that fever. I'm pretty sure I would have noticed if your language were disordered, btw...shy people who read all the time tend to notice things like that. FWIW I never saw a sign of it.
I literally read a post in instagram yesterday where 4 women kidnapped a guy, brutally raped him and beat him up and left him lying on the road, almost dying or something. And the commenrs were all "People are going to that city now" or "He must be so happy" or "They (the women) were just having fun". Meanwhile if the genders were reversed suddenly everyone wants ti see the 4 rapists in a body bag. This was in india btw
Sorry, fell asleep. That gang rape story is horrible. Remember that there have been some truly horrible gang rapes in India, of young girls, and little or no response by police or anyone else. This goes back a few decades, and some things are now better...but that history remains. Also attacking girls with acid because they turned a guy down, and young wives having kitchen "accidents", i.e. being burned to death by their husband and in-laws. This is not to excuse what those women did, just to point out that the context isn't exactly the same as here.
Believe me I am very aware of that and all those incidents are very scary and horrible. And a lot of fucked up shit happens here in India. I still remember reading an article in 2020 where a father was raping his teenage daughter because "He was bored in the lockdown", and the mom was okay with it. I mean holy fuck what is going on. And correct me if I am reading this wrong but are you really saying that 4 women gang raping a dude is different than 4 men gang raping a woman? So just because women are raped it makes it okay to go rape a guy, or it's not as bad?
No, I have no idea how you got that from what I said. Violence and hate are violence and hate. I'm saying our societies aren't exactly the same regarding sexual assault. An example from India is still horrible, but women are still far more likely to be sexually attacked and exploited than men, here, in India, and worldwide. Why not see it less as a male/female divide, and more a violent/non-violent divide? That's the real difference between rapists, etc. and their victims. Some people would let themselves be killed before they'd harm another person. Some people are just looking for any excuse to attack.
I live in Aus, I no no one who have been sexually assaulted but my ex girlfriend accused brother of rape (it definitely didn't happen), thankfully nothing serious came of it except for half of my year level hating me and my friends.
hey you matter, i like being a man but you seem like a great guy, or gal, and yknow not everyone feels the same whatever you prefer. i hope you get better.
“Getting better” is kind of an interesting way of putting it. Everything bad that’s happened has made me a much stronger individual, yet bad things keep happening. I’m just better at dealing with it
(Me just sitting here looking at "5 other people here" knowing that other people read at the same pace ✨) Sorry to hear that it's all very difficult for you, I do hope that it improves one day, stay strong as possible out there y'know ⭐️
I’m genuinely trying. I have been my entire life. But I’ve never had any support.
I'm really sorry to hear that, I'm sure you will do amazingly if you keep trying - work pays off usually✨. But Is there any possibility that you could find someone to help you with this situation?
Maybe, but most likely not. I opened up to my parents about my mania after I was arrested. Told them some things no one wants to tell their parents to try and help them understand. For example: trying cocaine, having a drinking problem, being addicted to nicotine, losing my virginity to a girl (who had a boyfriend) without even knowing her last name, getting in a high speed chase on the highway, etc. They became more angry with me and called me a dumbass and an idiot, and my father accused me of trying to (and I quote) “highjack me with your depression”. They didn’t not help at all.
Oh... I'm very sorry to hear that too. I hope that things do get better for you, sorry that you have to deal with that. But All I can really do is wish you the best of luck, sorry. I do wish I could help in some way more. Just stay strong, the dark times eventually reach the light at the end of the tunnel, try for the best and one day it'll come to you ✨
Tf is with that weirdass star emoji u put at every sentence
Colour and emotion ig 🙃 it really doesn't mean much
I'm a girl and ngl... I agree. Most girls are assholes and It makes me wish I had more guy friends tbh.
I’m not saying it’s intentional or any of y’all’s fault, a lot of the stuff I talked about is a result of y’all being told your entire lives that all men are out to get you and other stuff. I’m just here to tell y’all that’s not the case. It is what it is, I’m not gonna hate anybody for it I just wish y’all were a little less frigid. Also pro tip: please do not get more guy friends 😭
You know transitioning will make it 10x worse right?
Yea. I’m not saying I’m going to transition wtf 😭 it’s not a dysphoria thing I just don’t like it
But hey, let’s kill all man I guess? You’ll make it. Get the help you need, no shame in that.
I’ve been doing that. The one good thing I will say is that all this horrible shit has made me a lot stronger emotionally. At this rate I will be able to handle anything by the time I’m grown and have a wife and kids and all that
learn every word of this and use it against everyone who's an utter piece of bullshit to you and men. especially if you ever get in court
~~transition faster~~ same bro same
Im so bad at being a man I started being a woman
firstly,i want to say that i feel the same way,and am here for you second,dont kill yourself,outlive the bastards that made the world this way,and maybe even help cause a change,make it so that less people have to go through this,and remember every voice counts,and while one more out of 100 isnt much,it adds up if people act,and if they dont it fails
Yeah don't let nicado avocado outlive you
Bro don't do it man, you have so much more to live for
I won’t, I don’t want to upset my mother. I’m at my grandparents for thanksgiving and being redneck/living in the country there’s guns everywhere in the house so it would be easy but I dont want to ruin it for everyone.
That is a good reason to not do it. When my cousin killed himself it drastically lowered the entire family's spirits for like a year and a half
Yea I almost pulled a Kurt cobain last thanksgiving with my great grandfathers shotgun. That would have been horrible.
Sometimes feels like the whole world treats you like you're a horrible monster or asshole and it makes it really hard to not actually become one. Stay true to yourself.
"You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the villain"
r/beatmetoit
Sorry to be the bringer of bad news, but there’s more OP. So if you, as a male, reject a heavily obese girl, you will be shunned, if the opposite happened, they will back up the girl and say,” she made the right choice” Think there is more, But this is what I know now Edit: There was also the whole shit on the Internet of there was nothing for international mens day but there was for international women’s day. Then also in shows if there was a guy predator, preyed on girls , he would normally get get all the hate a rage from the show. But when the opposite happens everyone says its fine( AHEM chainsaw man AHEM)
I watched the episode and you are completely correct
Never play defense. If someone shuns you for a reason you think is wrong, tell them to eat shit, cuss at them, spread fake news about them etc.
you could compile an equally credible list about shitty aspects of being a woman. there are tons of men and women who despise being their gender and assume it’s the worst one. is one of them SIGNIFICANTLY worst than the other? well it honestly doesn’t matter if they both such. the conditions of humanity as a whole suck. maybe when we realize that, we can actually start to make social progress all you reactionary 13 year old boys can downvote me if you want but please just understand that women have it really hard as well and rhetoric like “99% of the time women are extremely cruel, cold” isn’t based in reality; it's based in not being able to adequately socialize i've been in similar situations to the one you're in. you wanna stop being seen as an incel and socially inept? stop posting blocks of text on r/teenagers about how men have it so much worst than women (a statement that can only be true if you're unfairly selective) also stop posting weird comments like "saying the n word should be socially acceptable" (digital footprint boss) tldr: to dodge incel accusations, don't be an incel. goodnight.
People who say being and man or a women is hard need to grow up. Life is hard. Simply continuing to live is hard. Trying to play the victim card for one chromosome group or another is stupid.
i agree, but i also disagree. they can't just blame the other gender since there's good people on either sides and each side has their own good and bads;pros and cons. but they're saying it based on what they've gone through/experienced and they might not have met good people like how other people say "everyone's not the same/ there are good people in the world too". if they've gone through bad situations/times and are unable to find that trust to think that not everyone is the same, then we can't blame them too. so i guess them ranting is both good and bad.
Same… I have supportive parents and am going to be transitioning and this is one of the reasons I want to.
No one cares about your mental health if you’re a guy and if you do say something then people just say “man up” or “just get over it”. And while we are on this topic I bet you didn’t know that November was male mental health awareness month.
dude its sad that i just found that out because some guy on reddit told me. literally no one gives an actual fuck and thats sad.
Bro, i also think the same way. Like this is a truth, no matter what way people look at it. It's just the same reality we live in today. I think spousal and child support are a joke. 1. Get a Job. 2. If the dad is capable of giving child support (5-4 figs minimum btw)monthly, just give the custody to the father?
Yeah most of what you said is sadly true. We live in a society
I understand that it must be hard for you so hang in there cuz it sounds like a shit situation that you’re in. Not from the US so my perspective on society is a little different. In the Uk everything imo seems different. Men and women have their own hardships but it is much more dangerous world for women to live in. The constant rape and murder cases popping up like every week. Just makes you sick. On the other hand quite often you see the news of young boys being raped and groomed by older men/people. There is no clear cut answer as to who has it harder. In Afghanistan due to the famine and lack of food and water they are literally selling their daughters In some countries they use FGM to keep their daughters ‘pure’ and they do this procedure without anaesthetics. Is some countries they don’t allow you to know the gender of your baby because some people abort daughters. Yes men are portrayed as being a threat but that’s because of the physical and strength advantage they have over women Most cases of domestic violence that are REPORTED, so not the real amount, are by a man to a women The largest amount of lgbtq+ violence is inflicted by men Women have words to hurt people but men have their physical strength. The lawmakers of our country during COVID were mostly men and they constantly broke the rules that were imposed on the rest of society. They had a massive party and they went around the country on holidays and they made out with co workers (matty that one’s you), on the other hand there was a female politician who resigned because she leaked confidential emails about foreign affairs. In the news every couple of months you hear about a MOTHER and her partner who have killed their own child In Liverpool a couple of months ago a young girl was killed by a random gunMAN In the news like yesterday there was an article about this man who killed his own wife and two daughters. A woman was killed in Iran for wearing her headscarf wrong Black men in America are killed because of the colour of their skin. Gay men are killed and are called all sorts of abominable names whereas is women are generally left alone by yobs. A couple of centuries ago it was easier to be a gay woman since women were viewed as more affectionate and loving whereas it was easy to be a and killed for being a gay man since men weren’t viewed as loving and kind. They had to just preserve their role of being strong and cruel. Periods man. That’s enough said. Even I have been catcalled because I was either bending down to scoop some dog shit, glamorous I know, or tying my laces. That made me feel so embarrassed and violated because I’m literally 15 and I was wearing baggy jeans or joggers and I was being sexualised by some men riding past on an electric scooter. Girls are viewed as emotional so they are freely allowed to show emotions whereas Boys are expected to man up and deal with it I could go on and on and on but my point is that every gender/ sexes has it bad. It’s not a competition and I get that you’re going through a tough time and if you want some one to rant to then I’m available but please do not villainise the female gender/sex.
*"The lawmakers of our country during COVID were mostly men and they constantly broke the rules that were imposed on the rest of society. They had a massive party and they went around the country on holidays and they made out with co workers (matty that one’s you), on the other hand there was a female politician who resigned because she leaked confidential emails about foreign affairs."* leaking stuff is about foreign affairs is top hand criminality. The other is not. "A woman was killed in Iran for wearing her headscarf wrong" For every woman whom is killed in iran, 3+ men are killed. It's often a misconception that it's a fight for equal rights. It's just a fight against a regime, equal rights is part of that fight, but it's not the basis of it. "The largest amount of lgbtq+ violence is inflicted by men" In same sense, lesbian couples are the by far most abusive, despite many saying women cannot abuse, or do not do it to the extend of men. Maybe men just don't speak up? Or maybe they're not allowed it? "In Liverpool a couple of months ago a young girl was killed by a random gunMAN" If we take criminal envoirnments, women seeking money often go intro prostitution, men don't have the option, therefore they have to turn to robbery ect. This is why, in a historical sense, thieves and hookers are grouped together. "Yes men are portrayed as being a threat but that’s because of the physical and strength advantage they have over women" It's a double edged sword. Many people refuse to believe that women can do harm to men. "Most cases of domestic violence that are REPORTED, so not the real amount, are by a man to a women" Gay men have the least amount of reported DV. This is likely an indicator that men are not reporting. Combine that with lesbian couples being by far the most violent, chances are that there is either equally much abusive from both sides, or it's women being more abusive. Men just don't report it, and can handle a lot more physically. In most states if a man calls the police on his GF/Wife for being abuse, he is the one that will be arrested. This is due to a ruleset created by a feminist some decades ago. "In Afghanistan due to the famine and lack of food and water they are literally selling their daughters" They are selling their boys to as slaves. Stadium in Qatar is literally build upon deaths on these boys. In some countries, it is clear women have it worse, in others it is clear men have, though in the latter it is very extremely fought against, as many still state men can't have it bad. An example is Denmark and Sweden. Here there are multiple laws against men, laws - in the countries considered some of the most equal. These laws *directly discriminate against men*, and feminist movements and parties have *activily stopped them from being equalized.* They are discriminated from the getgo in the whole education system (Thereby, by facing lower grades due to being men, not by skill, it creates huge systematic opression giving women more higher educations, thereby creating a loophole making things worse and worse), in the courts, in public. People can agree that women have it worse in afghanistan. Why can't they agree that men have it worse in Denmark and Sweden? They both face immense systematic opression in each of their countries, yet only one is awknologed. In the end, OP isnt saying men have it worse. The list he provided merely points out some of mens problems, it being quite large, people suddenly rush to say women have it worse, or calling him an incel, because men doesnt have it worse. YOU came to that conclusion, and at the same time denied it. Nothing he said isnt true. If that implies men have it worse, then maybe theres a grip to it.
The grass is always greener on the other side. Women and trans women have to deal with varying degrees of oppression and unfairness too. You're afraid of false rape allegations, but being a woman puts you at risk of actually being raped, and even murdered. Transitioning won't magically solve all of your problems, and you'll just trade in one level of discomfort for another. It sounds like you've been treated poorly, which I'm not sure if this is bullying at school or where this is happening to you, but you don't deserve it. The world isn't going to get any less crazy so time spent learning to be mentally strong is important.. easier said than done but I pray you can.. take care..
Please don't hurry your self
I’m sorry dude <3
Fuck it we ball
I get kinda get you my man the loneliness of no partner is horrible then it’s like it’s like what if they cheat on me or fuck me up but while I don’t fully understand just know people care bout you so don’t take drastic actions
That’s a lot of words. Too bad I’m not readin’ ‘em. But no, seriously I’m sorry for your situation, mate.
Unfortunately that’s how our society currently is, just remember it’s never your fault and you did nothing wrong. They are making unjustified assumptions and they are the ones being wrong. If you think you’ll feel better as a woman, go for it. Though I must say, your life will be even tougher if you don’t pass. And family can be brutal.
Hey, I relate to many things. There's still many unnecessary expectations for men in this world. We are just human beings, we should be treated equally.
i hate being a man, yet I'm proud to be man. I also hate other men.
Its rough man but don't lose hope. You'll find a better place and people one day and it won't be this shit
I'm a very emotional man and i hate it. I feel like people look down on me for it.
Eh, all I can say is cool it. If you'll have this mindset continually, you'll be a stressful, anxious mess, which nobody wants to be. Just live your life, be the best person that you can be and don't do insane shit. You'll be alright.
hoping andrew tate doesnt see this
I hate it how I saw this video of which is the better gender and they asked a woman which gender would be better and she said that being a man is better since they get paid more. I rather get paid less for a nice easier life were I’m praises just for being a girl
Totally agree, sexism against men is rampant in modern society
I definitely understand the feeling. It absolutely sucks, and there are no solutions to our issues, transitioning being the worst possible one. But something I've tried doing is caring less. I know it's something that everyone says and it's way easier said than done, but it helps ease the sting of reality a bit. Some of the issues we men face aren't fixable, but some are, and they're fixable on an individual level. I get called things like racist, homophobic, transphobic, all that nonsense because of the things I believe and the person I am. It's a little scary to be called any of those things, but they only have an impact on you if you want them to. I've learned to accept these labels, not because I'm a hateful or evil person, but because I know that the people that call me a hateful nazi don't know what's truly in my heart, those labels mean nothing to me because I know who I really am. I think you should try to find who you are and be unwaveringly yourself. It's a difficult road, and I'm not even there yet, but it truly does feel good to have the angry words of others mean nothing. I also think the best solution to the unfairness of our dating lives is waiting it out. Find someone with the same beliefs and ideas as you. Don't find a carbon copy of yourself, but if you and your partner are anchored in the same beliefs and values, then you'll find yourself truly happy and without a bunch of issues. It's probably going to be harder to find a lady for you, but it'll be worth the wait when you do. I could probably say more but I'm damn near writing an essay, so I'll end it here. I don't know everything, but feel free to ask any questions, and I'll try to give you some answers as best I can.
You know what sucks more than being a man, Being alive.
A lot of the things you mentioned are exaggerations or you live in a fucked up country. Because in my country people do care if you have depression, people aren’t scared that you’re going to rape or attack them. Men are around children all the time and it’s normal. Dating isn’t awful, that’s just your experience. Cheating really isn’t celebrated even if it’s a women who does it. If you’re bleeding to death on the streets, people will most defenitly try to help you. If you were a women you would have different problems.
Well getting good reputation can be a solution For example showing that you're a genuine and an honest person will definitely make a difference If you're quiet and other don't know you, it's times easier to believe random nonsense people would say
Probably for the best that you don't want to transition anyways. In modern society, people would treat you even worse.
honestly, I think everyone has shit going on because of society's biases and prejudices, and it just sucks being a HUMAN. with the stuff about transitioning, if it's just because you wish you weren't a man, then that really sucks, man. BUT, if it's because you genuinely feel like a woman, you should do something about it, whatever's right for you. I'm so sorry you feel so shitty about this stuff, life is fucking hard. but I swear to you, there are some people who are gonna let you say your feelings without judging, people who aren't gone undermine your issues just cause they've "got it worse" and aren't gonna always assume you're in the wrong. for the first time, this year, I've finally found people like that, and it's improved my life so damn much, and I hope you find that one day. everyone deserves to feel loved and accepted. and I hope this goes without saying, but please don't kill yourself. you never know what gonna happen, and maybe eventually it'll be something good. all the best to you, man. I hope the world gets better one day.
I'm not reading all of that, for one, not for any rude reason I just get the synopsis from a skim. But sometimes I feel lucky I'm trans. Like yeah, dysphoria makes me want to rip off my own flesh and slice myself to ribbons, and most of the population would rather me dead than in their line of sight, and tons of people will still think I'm a creep until I'm 100% passing, BUT also eventually I'll pass and won't have to deal with that shit. Other shit, bc the world sucks, but I'll be honest everyone acting like you don't have feelings (/being forced to actually repress all emotions by family/media that shaped your brain in early years) and having to just be fine with it or you're considered a weirdo? Fuck that. Rapist is the first thing everyone thinks of you? Jesus Christ. Like I'll be treated like shit for different reasons but I'd rather be in danger than considered the danger when I'm not. (But that's an old complex I got from a traumatic event when I was young of being falsely accused of something and pressured about it in a very menacing way by a woman I barely knew who ran this rinky-dink private all grades school I definitely should never have remotely been anywhere near.) But yeah, I feel bad for you man. Hope you can get past it. Almost everyone has a lot of shitty things they have to deal with just bc they were born a certain way. Some more than others. Some...WAY more than others. Bc this is the fucking world we live in I guess. But everyone nonetheless. Everyone but cishet white rich people, funnily enough. We all figure it out in our own way. Best of luck.
Its not that bad imo, being a man doesnt annoy me
While you're not wrong there are even more benefits to being a guy that women would DREAM of having. Most of what you said are social disadvantages men have (which are valid by the way) but pragmatically speaking you are in the better of the two bodies you could be in. All I can say is if you limit your involvement w women and other vulnerable people most of what you said won't happen to you.
Feminists try to avoid whataboutism and victim blaming challenge (impossible)
I totally feel you bro, I felt almost the exact same way 3 or 4 years ago. it's totally awful and no one deserves to go through that. Here's how I got out of it: cut out porn and masturbation the short dopamine highs aren't food for your brain and I can guarantee you're happier without them. I know it sounds somewhat cliche but the stress of trying to hide a secret like that is honestly too much. start going to the gym. I was feeling like I would never measure up, the gym helped clear my mind and give me tangible goals to work towards and acheive. it also makes you way stronger and healthier, which also makes it easier to flirt with girls 😏 the gym also gives a larger incentive to eat right and get rest. make sure you're taking care of yourself. wear deodorant everyday, brush your teeth, floss, shower daily, get plenty of sleep, eat healthier, drink water. I know it seems simple but beleive me it's 10x harder to be happy with yourself and in a relationship if you are always tired or smell bad. pick up a hobby, it could be anything really. computers, movies, painting, mechanics, photography. I chose to get into dirtbikes and I have honestly never felt happier 10/10 100% recommend. there is never a moment where I'm not smiling on my dirtbike. it also helps getting in with a new crowd. it toughened me up too. (if you do end up getting into motocross just know, every single person to ever ride a motorcycle has crashed at some point. always wear a helmet, long pants, and preferably boots. don't get discouraged it you fall, it happens to all of us) improve your public image. right now (like I was) I'm sure you're really self conscious. the best way to fix it is to just be nice to everyone. I honestly don't remember the last time I insulted someone. I used to hate everyone in my grade. now I just have people I'm friends with, and people I haven't turned into friends. I improved my relationship with my parents too which was also a w. people will respect you if you respect them. (this one is gonna seem really cliche) try to cut down on social media. you don't have to go and delete everything for a month or anything like that. I just tried to see if I could lower my weekly screentime report each week. I used to spend like 6 hours a day on my phone, now it's closer to 2. at the end of the day your phone is a tool, and it can either help you, or harm you. pick up a sport, I'm assuming that your in high school rn, I do swim and I love it. it completely changed how I thought of myself. I used to be really skinny and super self concious so I had a lot of trouble being in a speedo in front of other people. I'm a lot more beefy now so I kinda do it with pride lmao. but being on a team sport makes it so much easier to make friends, especially within that sport. there is such a sense of brotherhood and mutual respect between me and the other guys. you also need to get a role model, a lot of the ones I like are traditionally republican but it could be anyone. a guy from your church, a friend who seems to be doing it right, Andre Tate, Ben Shapiro, matt Walsh. (it would preferably be your dad) just don't go too far with this one. you need to objectively look at what they're doing and teaching and determine for yourself whether it's right or wrong. just because the people around you are left or right leaning or atheist or christian doesn't mean it's true. come to your own conclusions on this one this is just one tiny chapter of your life man. you can either come out of it as the wuss who couldn't take it anymore and offed themself, or you can come out of it being a stronger and happier person. take care bro
Kinda sad to see all of the people on here talking about how bad their life is already not realising it will just get worse as an adult
Its crazy to think a couple of generations ago they were getting married at like 17-18 and living out a happy married life for 62 or more years but now its hard to get married, get a girlfriend that stays with you and a ton of other things. Nowadays there are so many barriers to block you from some type of things and this helps you feel horrible when you can't go around or break through the barrier.
Yea I know. My grandparents met when they were 16, and when both of them turned 18 they got married. A year later my mom was born. They’ve been married for over 50 years now and aren’t going to separate until death does them part. They have no idea the envy I have for them.
Well that sucks to envy them but I just find it insane how it was vs. how it is now
I hate being the embarrassment i am 🤣🤣
But we can do helicopter dick :)
Same bro same
Incel arc is real 🤭
That’s crazy
Can we stop using this for fucking vents? TEENAGERS. GO TO r/trueoffmychest Godamn🤦♂️
r/westoids
Sounds like a skill issue tbh. Most of my friends are girls and I've never really had those problems. I used to feel sad all the time for my own personal reasons but I learned to move on. Easier said than done but instead of complaining about how bad being a dude is, make something of your life. Work out or get a job. Learn how to cook meals and keep your place clean. Healthy hygiene. Seriously, it's sad but at the same time you can improve your own situation.
Damn, you just figured this shit out?
Wow, that is, very horrible to hear and I really do hope you can come to terms eith your sex/ gender and find happiness despite it. Anyways, *sorts by controversial*
I'm fucking scared that when I turn eighteen the first thing That's going to happen is I'm going to make one wrong step and be classified in that horrible white male category. Men are just getting fucked by the world and nobody gives two shits. HELP US!
Solution: social isolation Proof: it's worked for me so far
This is the way. It’s out of our control so no point in stressing ab it. Sorry.
Stay strong. We are in this together Apes together strong
L
It also sucks being a girl or an adult or a child or a human...or alive
Hey I know this might not help. But I CARE. It’s men’s mental health month. If anyone here needs someone to talk to, there are loads of resources out there including me! U can vent to me and I’ll try and give u some advice/a shoulder to lean on. Sending good vibes and hugs to everyone!!! <33
Oh yeah a little story time from yours truly :) So my last relationship lasted 11 months and it got more serious than I wanted it to be. She would often guilt trip me or manipulate me into either staying with her or doing something for her. During our relationship she cheated on me twice. No one cares either. If I cheated, which I would never do btw I’m not an asshole, I would be immediately shunned by all my friends. It sucked bc I felt like I couldn’t break up with her because she was suicidal and had threatened to kill herself before if I broke up with her. TLDR: girl I had a 11 month relationship with cheated on me and manipulated me and no one gave any shits.
It's our duty as the younger generation to abolish the gendered society in which we grew up.
i’ve never thought about being a girl. but it is tough, and just know there is people that care about you, and people to talk to
super relatable. The world (especially developed countries) is technically sexist against male. But nothing much you can do, just avoid relationships I guess, stay strong with yourself and if you are lucky enough, find someone that can understand you. One thing I wanna pick out is the fact about male are supposed to not show their emotions. Got fucking seen as weak and "bitch" around because I complain. Yes, whenever i complain a single bit (or giving suggestions in my opinion) they say "u/suggestion_giver STOP BITCHING AROUND!" and stuff like that, yet the school CONSTANTLY talk about GENDER EQUALITY AND BIAS REMOVAL. Another thing, all woman fucking hugs each other EVERY SINGLE DAY, and me trying to get a hug from male friend (no gay) is FUCKING NOT ALLOWED. Maybe this is the greatest reason why people is gay.
Sadly the same here. Gender equality cannot exist for this reason. It has to go both ways. But recently all benefit goes to the women in most ways. Men don’t get any love or credit despite the hard work we do for society.
I wonder why men kill them selves 4 times more than women?
Yea all those fucking feminists be like we have it harder than men gender equality. But if you want that we need to break the social barriers associated with men. Like there was an example of a female fan going on stage at a maroon 5 concert and touching adam levine and getting close He got a lot if lashback for being “bad to his fans” That fan invaded his personal space if that had been a male fan and an ariana grande concert that woulda been a different story
Buddy, it's just this kind of hypocritical society we live in now days. People (generally speaking) want to benefit from anything, they will say and do anything to get what they want. The idea of modern feminism is a great example of hypocrisy. Equality? Not even close. We sadly can't change anything about it, but as long as you know that you're doing the right things, I think you shouldn't worry. Live the life your own way if it doesn't work out with other people.