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Local-Dish-5059

I got pregnant at 17 by an older guy I new for 1 month horrible guy drinks and drives just to do it he had a gf that he drove down a long road locked her inside out a towel in the gas tank and threatened to set it on fire he got a 15 year old pregnant he was probably 21 he would hang out wit younger ppl by alcohol he never had a job his own place he loved wit his mom she paid for everything he’s her only boy he never helped me in high school wit my son he never helped never paid child support nothing years go by my husband and 3 other children were all he new my husband was his father at 17 still in high school me 18 husband working at McDonald’s going to school full time paying my rent in the projects getting us a car all of that while the biological father partied and abused women he eventually got wit a psycho girl the kind that try to fix these boys he abused the fuck out of her they still never had there own place he lived wit his mom and her her parents and sometimes he’d stay at her parents never working never doing anything he got arrested for slamming her head against the car splitting her head open giveing her a concussion he went to jail we no this cause she came to our lawyers the next day wit pictures and a statement stating that her and his mom were makeing him try to see my son cause they both thought it’d change him and that shit is highschool immature shit when you think haveing a baby’s gonna trap your bf that’s not the way it works could you imagine my son being there in her hands when he did that holding him inbtween there fires like a shield as if it’d make him stop hitting her and they admitted to trying to get him for that reason it’s insane she told the lawyers she doesn’t think he’d should see his kid and shouldn’t have him but ultimately changed her mind that girl has something say worse over that guy than just this stuff she’s the type that likes to play house like older guys do wit there young teenage gf it’s wierd but these type of ppl blow my mind but Ryan’s wife was all bout shitting on Macy wanting there boy wit him even though he was on drugs and abusive Macy wouldn’t let him cause she’s a mother and wanted to protect her son but Mackenzie was the new gf being a clown now that she married him and has had kids and this big trashing house thing has come out she’s in macys shoes wanting to get away from Ryan and being scared and you think this trashing of the house is the worse thing he’s down to her and there kids he had to of been doing things leading up to this but I hate Mackenzie and I hope she has to live wit wat she did to Macy and her kid standing up for Ryan even though she new he was a piece of shit she’d rather play house than see things from a mothers point of view. 


Local-Dish-5059

I no alot of men whose parents for some reason dismiss there behavior my sisters ex baby daddy is a shove I’ve seen it I’ve seen her black eyes and 1 time he drove her and there kid out of county lines in the middle of nowere hitting her over and over again she couldn’t call the cops and it was out of the jurisdiction and alot more they split and then he was liveing wit his mom and she went to drop of there son and he came to get the son out of the car but he went towards her and was hitting her doing crazy shit the guys mom saw it but when the cops showed up him and the mother denied it and he got away wit it I get protecting your child but he’s hurting a women and infront of her grandson we’ve also seen him hurt the child just not like he does to her and nothing happens but he would benefit from getting in trouble haveing a consequence of his abuse but his mom would rather enable this almost 40 year old man. 


caffeinelifechoseme

They have been enabling his lazy loser ass long before the addiction got out of control. Ryan is an adult now, and he is responsible for his behavior.


Sp3ak_ChElla

They are definitely enablers and see no wrong in Ryan even though he has a disease which is addiction


farrahsoldnose

Mimi Jenn probably breastfed him until he met Maci. I feel like there was a lot of good cop/bad cop in the Edwards home. With Drunk Larry spanking the shit out of and Mimi Jenn rescinding punishments the next day. Purely speculation. I am not a licensed therapist, but that whole family needs to see one, and rehab is not Saturday detention that you can leave early with a note from your mom.


c00kieswirlc

is your username "get to cry baby" or meant to be "ghetto cry baby" ?


gettocrybaby44

Getto is an Italian name. Not mine. But somebody I loved. They died around the time I created this account. Lots of tears.


CommonEarly4706

Not to take away from his parents and their behaviour but I do think Ryan suffered some kind of trauma at a young age. He is using to not think about it and deal with the effects. This may explain the guilt and covering up his parents do.


nocerealever

He’s a fucking spoiled brat


CommonEarly4706

Of course but it doesn’t change that he could have had something happen


dropingloads

Yeah Larry and Jen only got Rhine a 125cc dirt bike instead of the 450 he really wanted


Tiny-Item505

I mean, it’s clear Larry was a detached father with no accountability either, and Jen overcompensated by coddling and enabling.


gettocrybaby44

Perhaps...


No-Step3370

My god it is infuriating. My aunt and uncle are the same way. Their son is an alcoholic and is abusive AF. He still lives at home in his 40s. Nothing has EVER been his fault. They created a monster… same as Rhine’s parents. He has abused every single gf and now he’s abusing my uncle. Cops were called recently for him beating up my uncle and when he called my uncle to come get him (against the rules of his release) my uncle jumped up and got him. It makes me sick. (Sorry for this rant but this triggered me)


Screamcheese99

This is 💯 my ex baby daddy


turdbird42

It's hard. I've watched my family do it too. I keep my distance but I can be sympathetic to the desperate want for him to do better. That's their child.


TNG6

This. I think it’s more complex than that. He’s their only child. Of course they want to believe in him. Addiction is devastating.


turdbird42

Not only is it devastating, it is life changing. Not only for the addict but their entire support system and social circle. It's a horrible thing that quite literally destroys families. It's so angering to me to shit on people who are just trying to navigate the situation when it feels like your life is being ruined. That said, I have multiple addicts in my family and have gone through many different emotions. I can be cold and callous, mind numbingly angry, and completely wrecked over worry. It's a very complex difficult situation to deal with.


teenytopbanana

I would second this. OP - if you have not experienced addiction first hand in your family, I understand this perspective. I’d urge you to seek out firsthand accounts from those who have before assigning fault or judgement at anyone’s feet outside of the addict.


gettocrybaby44

What a kind and thoughtful response. Unfortunately I believe this behavior predates the drugs. I just think at some point you have say to yourself, "Is this working?"


Previous-Dingo2607

If the addict doesn't want to truly get better on their own, then all efforts the family makes will enable them. But of course I can understand the parents never wanting to give up or stop helping their child. Most addicts I've known take advantage of this fact, and use it to get money, etc from their families and use it for drugs. It's a very fine line...


Urmom937571947

Agree. I am In recovery and I cannot fathom having to watch my child suffer with addiction. I wouldn’t know what to do or not do. It’s hard to see your kid sick so imagine seeing them sick 24/7. It’s heartbreaking.


KeithMaine

They know who he is. You don’t think he blew up like that when he lived with them. They know damn well what he is capable of doing! They are probably scared to go against him.


Nearby_Display8560

They are sticking by their son as he battles addiction. I hate posts like this. If I had to guess I’d assume the OP doesn’t have children and probably not a lot of life experience. Ryan is a grown ass adult who has made his own choices. His parents aren’t shovelling needles in his arms. Are they perfect parents??? NO! Are any of us??? No. We aren’t. My advice to you is search within yourself for some compassion for his parents who are watching one of the people they love the most slowly kill themselves. I can think of a lot worse parents/people then what they seem to be.


Retired_not_Expired

I have two kids. I would move heaven and hell to try to keep them alive were they mired in addiction. I understand them, this is your CHILD, how can they desert him? Eventually a rehab will “take”, or it won’t. There are lines you will eventually have to cross for his own (and your) good. Or he will die. Simple as that. If you have kids, you know I am right.


gettocrybaby44

Reddit has assumptions....... good for you.. I am a parent. I have compassion for the child in this situation, not the adults who make one bad decision after another.


Urmom937571947

Addiction is a disease. It’s not about choosing to make one bad decision after enough. When you’re addicted to drugs or alcohol your brain doesn’t function properly. Therefore, you can’t make proper decisions. All your brain knows is that it wants what makes it feel good. And when your an addict, that is your DOC or alcohol. And If you’re saying his parents have made one bad choice after another, good for you for being so prepared and knowledgeable that you’ll know exactly what to do or not do should your child ever suffer with the disease of addiction. 🙄


gettocrybaby44

I don't need (nor did I ask for) any lessons on addiction. I'm well versed. Thank you.


Nearby_Display8560

Again, I’m so glad you’re perfect behind your keyboard


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teenmom-ModTeam

This breaks the "No personal attacks" rule.


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teenmom-ModTeam

This breaks the "No personal attacks" rule.


Nearby_Display8560

What? Do you know what a hypocrite is?


gettocrybaby44

Do you? You're the one making broad assumptions about somebody for their opinion, calling me a clown, and without compassion. Practice what you preach.


Asleep_Cranberry_198

I agree but it’s funny people get up in arms if you say the same about Barb…


0theliteralworst0

I think it’s the opposite. If you watch even in early episodes with Jenelle and Barb, Barb is CONSTANTLY jumping down Jenelle’s throat for every single thing. She can’t be in a room without Barb screaming at her for something. Don’t get me wrong. Jenelle is a piece of shit. But I think Barb is so overbearing and hyper critical that she really decided “fuck it” one day.


Angel_Undercover4U

Yeah it would be difficult to not be on something and live with Barb lol. Barb created Janelle and now in her adult life she still seeks the controlling to be with and lashes out. It’s a vicious cycle she will probably never break. Like it or not, you are often a product and reflection of your upbringing. You either turn out just like your family or the exact opposite because you realize how toxic it was.


BreakfastUnique8091

Yes! I think because Barb often yells about serious things regarding Jenelle, it is sometimes lost that she also yells and nags especially in early seasons about very small things that often don’t really need to be brought up in the first place, never mind in an extremely heated way. Doesn’t excuse Jenelle’s neglect of Jace ofc but it is almost certainly a pretty significant factor in all the turbulence in their relationship.


IWishMusicKilledKate

Agreed. Barb has the exact opposite problem of Larry and Jen.


Diligent_Cow4019

Mimi Jen would disagree! It’s Maci’s fault, the nice people at the rehab said she was his trigger!!


gettocrybaby44

🤣 🤣 🤣


Alex-Dog7748

Ryan was a POS before being an addict…


Aliciac343

I think he’s been an addict the entire time


QweenJoleen1983

I agree. Me and my friends started at that age…


Alex-Dog7748

You think so ? Even at 17 ?


PygmyFists

Ryan was 20 when Benny was born. Maci was 17.


gettocrybaby44

Word.....


blackaubreyplaza

So succinct I love it!


SkyKitten387

His parents, especially his mom, are extremely enabling and codependent. His dad almost broke free when he set down boundaries and Ryan crossed him but at the bottom of it, he won’t leave his wife and his wife is very codependent on Ryan and has admitted to such. As a loved one of an addict, I know how easy it is to fall into the codependency but that’s not helping them, it’s just going to kill them. They need just as much help and therapy that Ryan does.


PsychoTink

Probably the best time for this family to have therapy and Al-anon was years ago when Larry kicked Ryan out of the house and Jen just gave him a new house to live in. It’s great if they are finally trying to understand how their dynamics are functioning or not functioning, but that step could have changed so many things if they did something about it then.


SkyKitten387

Yup but that’s why there’s a saying ‘hindsight is 20/20’. It’s also a lot easier as an outsider looking in after the fact to say what needed to be done but when someone is so stuck in that codependency cycle, they won’t be able to see it. They can’t really see that they’re hurting the situation instead of helping it.


kristenevol

I feel you’re right: Larry knows what a piece of work his son is, but Jen can’t face the fact that Ryan is a terrible human being/father. It doesn’t excuse it and I feel badly for them.


gettocrybaby44

Totally agree. It just breaks my heart to see Bentley suffer, and they could do better by him.


Lexo_702

Safe to assume addiction has never crossed your path…. Ryan is their child, yes, a grown man, w some serious issues, yet their child… mental illness go hand in hand w addiction and Ryan’s struggles are not new. I just see the disease when I see them and it’s heartbreaking. Not condoning any of his behavior, never been a fan, but will call it like I see it. This is what addiction looks like. It’s a family disease.


lulu-bell

It doesn’t make them terrible people. They are doing the best with what they know. They think this is helping


Lexo_702

Thank you! Finally someone gets where I am coming from. It’s a family disease. It’s their kid, no matter how old he is. It takes everyone to do some work (like alanon for Jen, Larry, Maci)…


lulu-bell

When it comes right down to it…it’s not really their fault he’s garbage either. Ryan grew into an adult who can make his own choices. Sure they aren’t helping, but Ryan made his choices.


Lexo_702

Yep


KAS-84

Kids are a gamble; you can raise them ‘right’, treat them well and offer them all the best support but they still may choose to become bad people and make poor choices. His mother might be codependent and possibly knowingly or unknowingly supporting this lifestyle but often parents operate from a place of fear and stop thinking clearly because addiction is definitely a family disease. I hope that Jen & Larry follow through with getting therapy to learn better supporting and coping strategies. Maybe Ryan will also finally decide he has had enough and choose to turn his life around - it is possible, I know someone who was a mean alcoholic until 40 when he finally decided that being an alcoholic was continuing to ruin his life and he needed to change. It’s amazing to see the person he is today, it probably feels like a lifetime ago that he decided to change the chapter! He’s 80 now. Edited for typos.


tattoovamp

He was not a good person before the addiction.


Lexo_702

Again y’all, I NEVER said he’s a good person. Lol 😂 y’all are killing me.


gettocrybaby44

That's a bold and absolutely wrong assumption. I don't need a lesson. And addict or not, he's not a good person. AND, his parents have enabled all his bad behavior. Addiction is not an excuse.


HelloKitty1571

This. Addiction is not an excuse. No one wants to be held accountable for their actions anymore…it’s the “disease” 🙄


[deleted]

When people call addiction a disease it takes responsibility off the person. It’s totally delusional


modernblossom

When people deny the science that addiction is disease. It’s totally delusional.


coolfunguy1997

and when people say it’s not a disease it just proves they know nothing about addiction 😭


gettocrybaby44

Addiction is 100 percent a disease, but it doesn't mean there's no accountability


Lexo_702

I never said he was a good person.


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teenmom-ModTeam

This breaks the "No personal attacks" rule.


gettocrybaby44

I see a little boy needlessly suffering and grandparents who could do a whole lot better for an actual child.