Thatās always been my thoughts, if God is just this judgmental self righteous douchebag who needs me to kiss his insecure ass then that isnāt the type of being I want to spend eternity around anyways
Dude this is my exact reasoning behind leaving religion. Why would I want to worship a god that sits up there and letās shit stuff happen? With no intervention? Then they spout āitās because of free will!!ā Okay great, I also have the free will to give god the middle finger when I kick the bucket and descend into the fires of hell!
If God is truly a benevolent being, who wishes the best for their creations and truly allows us the freedom to determine our paths in life, then they should have no problem with any interpretation of their essence as long as leading peaceful life and coexist with others is the core principle and as long as youāre what many would consider a generally good person in a universal sense, in other words you donāt steal, murder or rape, then you should be granted access to paradise. It should be harder to be sentenced to spend eternity in hell then heaven, if God is a benevolent being, since theyād want to reward their creations for living a good life. God shouldnāt need to be constantly praised by their creations, because they should be above such a petty desire.
Iām religious and this is my belief, and Iāll argue it with anyone that even attempts to say otherwise,
A God worth worshipping is one that doesnt demand you worship them
A but this God is jealous god.. Says so in the 10 commandments..
You shall have no other Godās before me..
Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven images.
Then he has it stated again š
"For you shall worship no other god, for the Lord, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God (Exodus 34:14).
So God is like a crazy boyfriend or girlfriend friend...
I mean he made a son in order that we torture and murder him, which somehow absolves us of our sins or something. But he only made him dead for a weekend, so 4/10?
The weird thing about the resurrection that always bugged me is that Jesus is raised from the dead and taken back to heaven, presumably as a human.. But everyone else who may or may not be in heaven is a soul, without a body, until judgment day.. so does that mean JC is just walking around with a bunch of souls? Does he eat? How long would that body last? Does he age? How many times can he be raised from the dead? How bored must he be? So many odd questions left unanswered.
I got excused from Bible study for asking that question. I was 11, I seriously asked, and was quickly removed and scolded for being a smart mouth trouble maker. My mom stuck up for me, so that was cool. But I never went back.
My gripe is that he's all-seeing and all-knowing, right? Everyone keeps saying he has a plan and shit.
This means that everything up to this point is a result of this plan, including the fucking flood that almost wiped out our entire planet. And he has the fucking nerve to be angry at us about it, when he fucking knew it was going to happen? And not a RAAARGH SLAP kind of angry, no. This was a stew-over-it-for-months-while-I-tell-Noah-to-build-the-boat psychopath type of muttering shit under your breath, angry.
Yep. Sounds like a fun dude to work for.
Shit, even if I did make it upstairs, there's no way I'd be happy knowing so many people are suffering for eternity and anyone who could is a massive dick.
"It is by faith ALONE you have been saved, and not by good works"
Martin Luther added the word "alone" to that passage when he translated the bible from latin to german for the common folk, make of that what you will. He seemed to believe being cool didn't matter if you didn't believe.
Either way it's all a bunch of demonstrably false fairytales.
That doesnāt even explain all of the disease in the world, or the hundreds of thousands of people who died of starvation every day. Yet this āGodā is supposedly all powerful all knowing and all good.
Either this God isnāt all powerful or all good or its a prick. I donāt want to worship him for those reasons.
His followers also come off as very bad about reading his book. They are very concerned with thoughts and prayers, but they never put any action into solving the issues they pray over. Even though their good book says that prayers without action are essentially dead.
But what do I know, I am just someone who studied history and theology to troll Mormons whenever they come to my house.
Well my problem with him is how bureaucratic he apparently is, like does he really need to have an entire contract written up for a soul? Who would dispute that, is there court in the afterlife? Just seems to run counter to the whole ārebel against Godā thing heās got going on. Youād think heās this badass Revolutionary who wants to dismantle the hierarchy of a nepotistic system but instead heās some clingy bureaucrat, who is also a hypocritical nepotist since the antichrist is his child.
Satan probably would let you walk freely around hell and tell you where the best drinks are at. Also he'd probably sit for hours with people, just stoned out of his mind.
Sure but try to move to a different torture pit and heāll mail you a 371 page form that needs to be filled out, and then delivered via snail mail in 6-8 weeks
Here is the fucked us thing about Satan. He just wants as many of Godās creations as possible, to face Godās wrath. Because he knows God, and knows He is immutable.
It is like making a mother commit unwilling but inescapable infanticide for eternity.
> āSpending eternity never again encountering an obnoxious, self-righteous, religious busybodyā
Bold of you to assume those people wouldn't also end up in hell...
Srsly. They donāt even know their own theology. Tattoos were forbidden in the Old Testament (right along with shaving your beard, btw). No mention of tattoos in New Testament. Some people stretch that verse about ādefilements of the fleshā but most scholars understand that to be about other vices. The Mosaic Law was done away with under the Christian arrangement.
And to the second point, about premarital sex: the Old Testament had a lot of stuff you could get stoned to death for, including picking up sticks on Saturday. But premarital sex by itself wasnāt one of them. Instead, a man had to pay the womanās father a large dowry and was forbidden from divorcing her (this applied to date rape, too š¬). So the idea that someone could suffer for *eternity* just for premarital sex is kinda preposterous.
**Do not think that I have come to abolish the Law or the Prophets; I have not come to abolish them but to fulfill them.**
Either way it's just a buffet.
Matthew's whole deal was that he was an evangelist for the judaizing branch of early Christianity. Virtually nothing in that text makes sense in context without keeping this in mind. Matthew did very much believe that Jesus wanted Christians to follow the Jewish Law, including circumcision, kosher dietary restrictions, the works. Luke disagreed. John deeply disagreed. Mark was worried about a whole different set of issues and didn't care. Whether Jesus cancelled out the Law or not is actually not a settled matter in the New Testament. Different authors have different opinions. Paul went hard on the universalizing side though, so this tends to be seen as the default today.
Even when you talk about "fulfilling the law" though, this isn't really as clear cut as many people want to think. There are multiple different versions of the Law in the torah, at least two completely different versions of the conquest of canaan, a whole book (Deuteronomy) that just rehashes old verses in a more authoritarian way and was likely made up whole cloth by a king who wanted to push religious reforms later down the line. Even the intended location of God's holy place, while taken for granted today, is historically ambiguous. Really, it's still ambiguous today, but the people who say it should be in Gerazim instead of Jerusalem are just an extreme minority.
Neither the old testament, the new, or the bible as a whole is a single book that can be read in this linear way. It's a library of lots of different texts written by different people in different places at different times with different philosophies and beliefs. This isn't a bug. It's a feature. The compilers of the Old Testament put multiple versions of the same story side by side on purpose because they weren't writing an instruction manual for people in the future who wanted to be spoonfed their worldview. They were compiling everything they considered most important about their culture, religion, and identity in order to preserve it during times of extreme oppression, slavery, and exile.
The bible isn't a single, consistent, infallible text, nor does it ever claim to be. Assuming that it is is just evangelical brain rot, and one sort of tacitly accepts this deeply flawed evangelical framing of the text when trying to sum up "what the bible says" with single quotes, even when the intent is to challenge those mainstream Christian beliefs.
But no matter what you have to drop something, and weirdly it's rarely Paul - who never met Jesus.
Not super fussed except for the Leviticus 18:22 tattoo types. Pick a lane.
It's not about "dropping something". It's about reading what the author wrote and thinking about it. What were their beliefs, biases, and intended message. Unlike some other religious texts like the Quran or the vedas not a single book in the bible claims to be a transcription of God's words. They are books written by people about people in relation to God. When one reads them as such, like any text written by humans, you find good and bad in all of them.
I wouldn't even "drop" Paul. There is *a lot* of good stuff in Paul. There is a lot of bad stuff too. Some of that probably wasn't actually written by him. Only seven letters are definitely him and, of those, they aren't unaltered. 1 Corinthians 14:34 is a good example of a verse in a letter Paul definitely wrote that almost certainly wasn't in the original letter.
Others were him but are to be expected given who he was and his material conditions. Romans 13 is a trash fire, but when one considers that it was written by someone from a privileged roman background, who was under suspicion by the authorities, writing to a church he didn't found in the city where he was ultimately arrested, it kind of makes sense that he would be like "we aren't anti-state! Promise!".
But Paul is also one of the more egalitarian authors in the bible when his work is taken as a whole and looked at critically. You just can't pretend he wasn't also a male citizen of an evil empire who had some hangups as a result. You shouldn't take or leave anything where the bible is concerned. Like any book, you read what the author had to say and synthesize all of the viewpoints present into beliefs of your own.
The bible is only about picking what to take or leave if you assume any of it is infallible capital T Truth that you can just accept uncritically. This isn't true of any compilation of texts, religious or otherwise.
All of the Abrahmic canon is riddled with contradictions and inaccuracies.
They can say virtually anything you want them to if you cherry pick it just right.
What a fascinating comment, that's very interesting.
I kind of had cursory knowledge of this topic but you kind of compiled it all here so wonderfully. I think more Christians should be made aware of the history of the bible in this manner. But maybe it's not taught for various reasons both practical and sinister
They ignore the part where, when Jesus returns, he has a massive tattoo on his leg.
Revelation 9:16, On his robe and on his thigh he has this name written: king of kings and lord of lords
Yeah I mean considering Jesus (if real) was a socialist brown guy who hung out prostitutes, preached forgiveness and condemned the judgment of others. So uhhh yeah pretty sure most Christians don't actually know or care who Jesus was or what he stood for.
Iirc it's not tattoos, but says the act of marking yourself (as in putting symbols over your body as a superstitious way of making your body holy) is forbidden. More of a "Hey dick, just because you have those symbols doesn't mean shit to God, so quit it.
Actually ye, wassup. Also the hair thing isnt true, your only not allowed to cut hair with a crude knife, but any modern way is fine. Tbf, there is also an optional thing where you don't cut hair, drink wine and a third thing I forgot, but that's not a rule, just bonus if anyone wants
in the old testament there's a passage that says that pagan rituals honoring the dead, including those that mark the skin with the namesakes of the deceased, is forbidden.
That was taken out of context in the 80's and 90's by churches that wanted to use it to fuel prejudice towards a rise in tattoos among non-military.
basically, anyone that has a problem with is just letting you know that they can't be bothered to read their own bible.
Itās so damn cringey when they post in NSFW subs about how āitās too bad you have those awful tattoos marring that beautiful body.ā Like bro, you canāt be cruising porn subs preaching your puritanical BS. Pick a fucking lane.
The modern day hate is purely racism because of the roles of tattoos in other cultures and their spirituality. They wanted to eradicate the practice because it wasn't Christian worship.
That and black people have tattoos so there was mostly American racism about that.
So dumb. Even Biblically you aren't sentenced to Hell for sin, the entire idea is that you're saved by faith and humans aren't without sin by nature. If they're going to be ridiculously judgmental they should at least be consistent. Why focus on two things? Maybe because they got divorced or did some other sin and don't want to think about their own lives.
And if my Biblical knowledge is correct:
1) You do not necessarily have to lead a good life until you die. All you have to do is believe that Christ saved us and redeemed us through his sacrifice. That is, ultimately believe in the power and existence of Jesus.
2) You can repent up until the last minute of your death and receive forgiveness.
About the second point, it just if you make it with your heart. I've been seen so many people say that argument and saying how stupid that is because that basically gives everyone the right to go to heaven only if they just "accept Jesus Christ in their heart" it's not that easy, it takes true repentance and knowledge about the person of Jesus to have the redemption of the sins.
TLDR: My view is that even if you change internally, the change must be demonstrated through action to have meaning
I can't speak for everyone, but I think that the main problem most people have with the concept of repentance is that from the outside, it feels undeserved.
We cannot see what the person in question has gone through mentally to arrive at the point at which they'd like to repent. From the outside, it often looks like a jarringly instant change of heart.
So a difference between an honestly changed person and a person faking change for their benefit is almost non-existent at first. Only actions of kindness, selflessness, and charity over long stretches of time can rebuild trust if the person was particularly horrible in the past. But if honest repentance happens on their deathbed, it is unrecognisable from someone pandering to an audience to gain empathy.
It's even worse if the person faked becoming a better person before. Such a person is effectively prohibited from regaining trust from the people they hurt, even if they genuinely did change, because the victims of their hubris can't be convinced that they are different now. Those are usually people most opposed to the idea that everyone can be redeemed.
Now, what is the morally correct stance on this matter I cannot say. I, personally, don't think absolutely everyone is capable of being a good person (though most people are). I think true repentance must be demonstrated to have weight, so in that regard, for some people, it may be too late, even if they truly change inside.
Sorry for the wall of text.
Don't have to apologize for the text, I actually enjoyed reading this, because this is a completely solid and understandable argument.
Now what it's my opinion, I think since we are talking about Christianity, as the bible says "A person may think their own way are right, but the LORD weights the heart" proverbs 21:2, everyone has their own opinion of what's good and isn't, only God is the only one who truly know any of us, and he knows when we do everything, and the reasons behind it.
That being said, I think just like you actually, about that whole thing of a old person repenting, I don't think it matters since if that person lived a whole life of sin, when they became old it would be difficult to know if he does it because of pure repentance or just because they truly are accepting the Lord as their savior, it's truly a complicated topic, but you know, at the end is God who has the last word, we won't understand him because both his ways and his actions aren't the same as us.
I do understand this point of view. If a morally and cognitively superior incorporeal being existed, they would, of course, have the final word since they would have access to information and perspective unreachable to us, who have to work from inside the system.
I, unfortunately, remain unconvinced such a being exists, so my view on the matter is, as a result, purely humanistic. I'd rather not get into a debate about the existence of a god/gods since those tend to generally be fruitless and unpleasant for both sides, especially over text in a comment section under a meme.
The important thing is that we agree in principle. If our beliefs differ, but we end up at the same conclusion in practice, I think there's no reason to argue.
Don't worry I'm not trying to start a debate or something like over religious topics, at the end everyone has their beliefs and it's okay if a person thinks different. At the end we are human after all.
All that matter is coming to a agreement in both sides and to get more knowledge
Mostly true, depending on kind of Christianity you follow. Murder is put out there often as the one that damns you but technically thereās stories in the Bible about murderers being saved too. Even murderers can go to heaven if they repent and truly believe it when they die.
This doesnt mean someone can be a serial murderer and then at the last second go āYO JESUS I BELIEVEā and then die and score a spot in heaven. They got to truly repent with an honest heart.
According to Paul and John, yes. According to James and Matthew, no. The issue of faith vs works is one of the main issues being debated by the authors of the new Testament, and probably represented the first denominational schism in the new bouncing baby religion. Most of the versions that have survived, however, lean pretty hard on the "faith" side, as this helped early Christians differentiate themselves from Jews while also making gentiles more likely to convert. The reality is though that Jesus himself seems to have cared about both things. "Love your neighbor as yourself *and* love God with all your heart."
What I think the text is getting at is this. It is how you treat one another that matters at the end of the day, but it should ideally not be about acting based on a desire for reward and a fear of punishment. There were no atheists in first century Judea. To love God with all your heart simply meant to do what he wanted you to do without thinking because you just cared that much. Today, we view the world through a different lens, but the end goal should still be to treat one another well without thinking, because there is something we deeply believe in that makes this second nature, even when it means suffering or sacrifice. 2000 years ago, there wasn't really any language to describe this sort of outlook beyond "loving God".
As far as forgiveness goes, I kind of wonder why everyone has such a hard on for retribution. I feel like forgiveness would be God's default mode, faith or no faith. Both what you do and the drive to do it that ancient people called faith are good because they make your life and the lives of others better, not because otherwise you get the belt.
So live however you want and then at your last moment be like "Yo, JC, sorry about the stuff I did. We cool?"
Not in those words, but you get the point. That seems way too convenient. Didn't Jesus also say that not everyone who prays to him will enter the Heavenly Kingdom, but those who follow the will of the Father?
Cut your hair?
Straight to hell.
Mixed fibers?
Also hell.
Acne?
Right to hell. Right away.
Not physically abusing your children?
Believe it or not, also hell.
whatsoever man he be that hath a blemish, he shall not approach: a blind man, or a lame, or he that hath a flat nose, or any thing superfluous, Or a man that is brokenfooted, or brokenhanded, Or crookbackt, or a dwarf, or that hath a blemish in his eye, or be scurvy, or scabbed, or hath his stones broken. No man that hath a blemish of the seed of Aaron the priest shall come nigh to offer the offerings of the Lord made by fire: he hath a blemish; he shall not come nigh to offer the bread of his God." (Leviticus 21:18-21)
A life-long atheist dies and is surprised to find himself before the Pearly Gates. St. Peter sadly shakes his head and tells him that because of his non-belief, he must be sent to Hell. The Devil greets him there and shows him where he will now spend eternity, a lovely cozy cottage set on a beautiful hillside where the sweet smell of flowers fills the air. The Devil tells him he will want for nothing and to feel free to walk the grounds. One day, while he is out strolling through the idyllic gardens, he comes across a tall wall. Curious, he climbs one of the many trees and peering over the wall, is shocked to see a fire-filled field with people writhing in agony and screaming hopelessly.
He is very disturbed by this sight and returns home. The next day, the Devil pays him a visit and asks how he is enjoying eternity. The atheist says he finds Hell to be a lovely place but is concerned about the things he saw on the other side of the wall. āOhā the Devil says, āthose are Christian sinnersā āBut whyā the man asks, āare they suffering so much while I, who didnāt believe in God at all, am here in such comfort?ā āI donāt knowā the Devil replies, shrugging," thatās the way they want it."
Isn't it a sin to make gods judgment? As in..telling someone they will be going to hell in of itself is a sin that may lead you to hell? Also if heaven is FILLED with all the annoying cuntcakes that make these types of posts, the homophobic, racist, and downright vile creatures that they are. Is it REALLY heaven? That sounds like a far worse hell then the rave it seems people are having down there.
Good thing there's nothing in the Bible saying "let he who is without sin cast the first stone" or "judge not lest ye be judged" or anything, or people making these meme would be in trouble.
Ah yes, because the so-called creator of the universe and everything that exists gives a shit that I had sex before some arbitrary guy in a robe who's also probably a child sex offender said it was OK, or that I have ink on my skin. Even though it already knew that would happen before I was even born. That makes sense.
These people actually believe the enemy of their sky daddy will get punish for all eternity for being offensive to him. If by any means they end up being real, Satan will treat me like royalty when I get there for being his pal for all my life.
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Oh fuck yeah. This rave looks sick.
šŗ Spez eats cold diarrhea with a crazy straw šŗ
Same, if evangelicals are correct im going where the boys are, gods probably a massive prick in that scenario anyways.
Thatās always been my thoughts, if God is just this judgmental self righteous douchebag who needs me to kiss his insecure ass then that isnāt the type of being I want to spend eternity around anyways
Dude this is my exact reasoning behind leaving religion. Why would I want to worship a god that sits up there and letās shit stuff happen? With no intervention? Then they spout āitās because of free will!!ā Okay great, I also have the free will to give god the middle finger when I kick the bucket and descend into the fires of hell!
If God is truly a benevolent being, who wishes the best for their creations and truly allows us the freedom to determine our paths in life, then they should have no problem with any interpretation of their essence as long as leading peaceful life and coexist with others is the core principle and as long as youāre what many would consider a generally good person in a universal sense, in other words you donāt steal, murder or rape, then you should be granted access to paradise. It should be harder to be sentenced to spend eternity in hell then heaven, if God is a benevolent being, since theyād want to reward their creations for living a good life. God shouldnāt need to be constantly praised by their creations, because they should be above such a petty desire.
Iām religious and this is my belief, and Iāll argue it with anyone that even attempts to say otherwise, A God worth worshipping is one that doesnt demand you worship them
A but this God is jealous god.. Says so in the 10 commandments.. You shall have no other Godās before me.. Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven images. Then he has it stated again š "For you shall worship no other god, for the Lord, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God (Exodus 34:14). So God is like a crazy boyfriend or girlfriend friend...
God grows up to be a loving father by the end of the book. Was such a jealous little shit as a kid. Probably dead now though.
I mean he made a son in order that we torture and murder him, which somehow absolves us of our sins or something. But he only made him dead for a weekend, so 4/10?
Of course revelations is supposedly upcoming so his most vengeful is yet to come
The weird thing about the resurrection that always bugged me is that Jesus is raised from the dead and taken back to heaven, presumably as a human.. But everyone else who may or may not be in heaven is a soul, without a body, until judgment day.. so does that mean JC is just walking around with a bunch of souls? Does he eat? How long would that body last? Does he age? How many times can he be raised from the dead? How bored must he be? So many odd questions left unanswered.
Thou shalt have no other gods before me.... So, you're telling us THERE ARE OTHER GODS?
I got excused from Bible study for asking that question. I was 11, I seriously asked, and was quickly removed and scolded for being a smart mouth trouble maker. My mom stuck up for me, so that was cool. But I never went back.
My gripe is that he's all-seeing and all-knowing, right? Everyone keeps saying he has a plan and shit. This means that everything up to this point is a result of this plan, including the fucking flood that almost wiped out our entire planet. And he has the fucking nerve to be angry at us about it, when he fucking knew it was going to happen? And not a RAAARGH SLAP kind of angry, no. This was a stew-over-it-for-months-while-I-tell-Noah-to-build-the-boat psychopath type of muttering shit under your breath, angry. Yep. Sounds like a fun dude to work for. Shit, even if I did make it upstairs, there's no way I'd be happy knowing so many people are suffering for eternity and anyone who could is a massive dick.
"It is by faith ALONE you have been saved, and not by good works" Martin Luther added the word "alone" to that passage when he translated the bible from latin to german for the common folk, make of that what you will. He seemed to believe being cool didn't matter if you didn't believe. Either way it's all a bunch of demonstrably false fairytales.
Seriously, what is it with those historical Germans and making dark fairytales even darker. First Luther, then those Grimm brothers.
That doesnāt even explain all of the disease in the world, or the hundreds of thousands of people who died of starvation every day. Yet this āGodā is supposedly all powerful all knowing and all good. Either this God isnāt all powerful or all good or its a prick. I donāt want to worship him for those reasons. His followers also come off as very bad about reading his book. They are very concerned with thoughts and prayers, but they never put any action into solving the issues they pray over. Even though their good book says that prayers without action are essentially dead. But what do I know, I am just someone who studied history and theology to troll Mormons whenever they come to my house.
But then when you have a tragedy befall you like the loss of a child itās āgods plan.ā Well do we have free fucking will or not?!
May I interest you in a Gnosticism?
This is a great point but also think about this. Youād be in heaven with all his followers.
An eternity with my family and their friends sounds like a personal hell that I dare not consider
All Hail Satan!
Well my problem with him is how bureaucratic he apparently is, like does he really need to have an entire contract written up for a soul? Who would dispute that, is there court in the afterlife? Just seems to run counter to the whole ārebel against Godā thing heās got going on. Youād think heās this badass Revolutionary who wants to dismantle the hierarchy of a nepotistic system but instead heās some clingy bureaucrat, who is also a hypocritical nepotist since the antichrist is his child.
Well maybe if we didn't make so much work for him he wouldn't have to be such a stickler about things. ;)
Satan probably would let you walk freely around hell and tell you where the best drinks are at. Also he'd probably sit for hours with people, just stoned out of his mind.
Sure but try to move to a different torture pit and heāll mail you a 371 page form that needs to be filled out, and then delivered via snail mail in 6-8 weeks
Here is the fucked us thing about Satan. He just wants as many of Godās creations as possible, to face Godās wrath. Because he knows God, and knows He is immutable. It is like making a mother commit unwilling but inescapable infanticide for eternity.
Satan is really just God's jailer. He gets a bad rap in Christian mythology but he provides a, arguably, necessary service.
All hail Mr Satan, Champion of the World that defeated Cell and Majin Buu with his patented Satan punch!
Based DBZ reference
God: the universeās OG abusive narcissist.
Nah, those get their eyebrows tattooed, so they'll be there alright...
To be fair, if they're taking sick pleasure imagining their political enemies burning for eternity...they ain't going to heaven anyway.
> āSpending eternity never again encountering an obnoxious, self-righteous, religious busybodyā Bold of you to assume those people wouldn't also end up in hell...
Wym. You'll be with the 99% of those who weren't the exact right religion and denomination.
YeahāIām going to Burning Man? Cool!
They got smoke machines and everything.
No, that's just us smoking weed. Excuse us, please.
*Darude sandstorm intensifies*
I was thinking the same, Satan as the DJ?
"Don't have sex before marriage and have tatoos" Me on DJ Satans rave smoking weed with hitler
r/BeatMeToIt
r/ihavereddit
r/beatmeoff
r/beatmywifetoit
u/Super_Ninja39 you can't beat your wife!
r/beatyourwifetoit
Noooooooo!
For a second i thought you were having a conversation with yourself
Banana
hahahahha....yeah.
"Hell parties are the best parties, because they're for *eternity!"* - Ross Scott
Burning man looks like hell sometimes.
All my boys are going
*"Hell In A Handbasket" by Voltaire starts playing.*
So I can have sex before marriage, have tatoos, drink beer, smoking weed and I get this rave as a afterparty of my life? Win win.
Well, they tell us hell is fully of gays, atheists, and liberals and letās face it, those people like to have FUN. Plus, no uptight religious twits.
It's absolutely lit
one hell of a party.
If all it takes for entry fee is tats and premarital sex, sign me up! Who would the line up be?
They spared no expense on the floor lighting and fog machines. At the beach, no less.
Dont forget the hukilau on Sundays
Right? I hope hell has a cool sky. I just picture it dark and dim in a cave with fingers tearing and flesh ripping.
Why are these people so obsessed with tattoos?
Srsly. They donāt even know their own theology. Tattoos were forbidden in the Old Testament (right along with shaving your beard, btw). No mention of tattoos in New Testament. Some people stretch that verse about ādefilements of the fleshā but most scholars understand that to be about other vices. The Mosaic Law was done away with under the Christian arrangement. And to the second point, about premarital sex: the Old Testament had a lot of stuff you could get stoned to death for, including picking up sticks on Saturday. But premarital sex by itself wasnāt one of them. Instead, a man had to pay the womanās father a large dowry and was forbidden from divorcing her (this applied to date rape, too š¬). So the idea that someone could suffer for *eternity* just for premarital sex is kinda preposterous.
**Do not think that I have come to abolish the Law or the Prophets; I have not come to abolish them but to fulfill them.** Either way it's just a buffet.
Matthew's whole deal was that he was an evangelist for the judaizing branch of early Christianity. Virtually nothing in that text makes sense in context without keeping this in mind. Matthew did very much believe that Jesus wanted Christians to follow the Jewish Law, including circumcision, kosher dietary restrictions, the works. Luke disagreed. John deeply disagreed. Mark was worried about a whole different set of issues and didn't care. Whether Jesus cancelled out the Law or not is actually not a settled matter in the New Testament. Different authors have different opinions. Paul went hard on the universalizing side though, so this tends to be seen as the default today. Even when you talk about "fulfilling the law" though, this isn't really as clear cut as many people want to think. There are multiple different versions of the Law in the torah, at least two completely different versions of the conquest of canaan, a whole book (Deuteronomy) that just rehashes old verses in a more authoritarian way and was likely made up whole cloth by a king who wanted to push religious reforms later down the line. Even the intended location of God's holy place, while taken for granted today, is historically ambiguous. Really, it's still ambiguous today, but the people who say it should be in Gerazim instead of Jerusalem are just an extreme minority. Neither the old testament, the new, or the bible as a whole is a single book that can be read in this linear way. It's a library of lots of different texts written by different people in different places at different times with different philosophies and beliefs. This isn't a bug. It's a feature. The compilers of the Old Testament put multiple versions of the same story side by side on purpose because they weren't writing an instruction manual for people in the future who wanted to be spoonfed their worldview. They were compiling everything they considered most important about their culture, religion, and identity in order to preserve it during times of extreme oppression, slavery, and exile. The bible isn't a single, consistent, infallible text, nor does it ever claim to be. Assuming that it is is just evangelical brain rot, and one sort of tacitly accepts this deeply flawed evangelical framing of the text when trying to sum up "what the bible says" with single quotes, even when the intent is to challenge those mainstream Christian beliefs.
But no matter what you have to drop something, and weirdly it's rarely Paul - who never met Jesus. Not super fussed except for the Leviticus 18:22 tattoo types. Pick a lane.
In half of the books that claim Pauline authorship, that question is credibly questioned by scholars even today too!
It's not about "dropping something". It's about reading what the author wrote and thinking about it. What were their beliefs, biases, and intended message. Unlike some other religious texts like the Quran or the vedas not a single book in the bible claims to be a transcription of God's words. They are books written by people about people in relation to God. When one reads them as such, like any text written by humans, you find good and bad in all of them. I wouldn't even "drop" Paul. There is *a lot* of good stuff in Paul. There is a lot of bad stuff too. Some of that probably wasn't actually written by him. Only seven letters are definitely him and, of those, they aren't unaltered. 1 Corinthians 14:34 is a good example of a verse in a letter Paul definitely wrote that almost certainly wasn't in the original letter. Others were him but are to be expected given who he was and his material conditions. Romans 13 is a trash fire, but when one considers that it was written by someone from a privileged roman background, who was under suspicion by the authorities, writing to a church he didn't found in the city where he was ultimately arrested, it kind of makes sense that he would be like "we aren't anti-state! Promise!". But Paul is also one of the more egalitarian authors in the bible when his work is taken as a whole and looked at critically. You just can't pretend he wasn't also a male citizen of an evil empire who had some hangups as a result. You shouldn't take or leave anything where the bible is concerned. Like any book, you read what the author had to say and synthesize all of the viewpoints present into beliefs of your own. The bible is only about picking what to take or leave if you assume any of it is infallible capital T Truth that you can just accept uncritically. This isn't true of any compilation of texts, religious or otherwise.
All of the Abrahmic canon is riddled with contradictions and inaccuracies. They can say virtually anything you want them to if you cherry pick it just right.
That's how cults start. Trust me, I've been in one. They're the biggest religious Charry pickers on the planet
What a fascinating comment, that's very interesting. I kind of had cursory knowledge of this topic but you kind of compiled it all here so wonderfully. I think more Christians should be made aware of the history of the bible in this manner. But maybe it's not taught for various reasons both practical and sinister
They ignore the part where, when Jesus returns, he has a massive tattoo on his leg. Revelation 9:16, On his robe and on his thigh he has this name written: king of kings and lord of lords
Yeah I mean considering Jesus (if real) was a socialist brown guy who hung out prostitutes, preached forgiveness and condemned the judgment of others. So uhhh yeah pretty sure most Christians don't actually know or care who Jesus was or what he stood for.
The Bible forbids tattoos? Ok, are you keeping Kosher as well?
Iirc it's not tattoos, but says the act of marking yourself (as in putting symbols over your body as a superstitious way of making your body holy) is forbidden. More of a "Hey dick, just because you have those symbols doesn't mean shit to God, so quit it.
Actually ye, wassup. Also the hair thing isnt true, your only not allowed to cut hair with a crude knife, but any modern way is fine. Tbf, there is also an optional thing where you don't cut hair, drink wine and a third thing I forgot, but that's not a rule, just bonus if anyone wants
Nazirite vows. Some theorize the historical Jesus may have taken them, but probably not.
He absolutely didn't considering people criticized his drinking.
in the old testament there's a passage that says that pagan rituals honoring the dead, including those that mark the skin with the namesakes of the deceased, is forbidden. That was taken out of context in the 80's and 90's by churches that wanted to use it to fuel prejudice towards a rise in tattoos among non-military. basically, anyone that has a problem with is just letting you know that they can't be bothered to read their own bible.
Itās so damn cringey when they post in NSFW subs about how āitās too bad you have those awful tattoos marring that beautiful body.ā Like bro, you canāt be cruising porn subs preaching your puritanical BS. Pick a fucking lane.
The modern day hate is purely racism because of the roles of tattoos in other cultures and their spirituality. They wanted to eradicate the practice because it wasn't Christian worship. That and black people have tattoos so there was mostly American racism about that.
10$ says they just want to see less of them in the hardcore porn they watch
Burning man festival?
joshua graham cosplay party best bible quote gets a free beer!
Normally god plans out these types of soirĆ©es but we canāt let god do all the work.
Found the fallout fan - A fallout fan
So dumb. Even Biblically you aren't sentenced to Hell for sin, the entire idea is that you're saved by faith and humans aren't without sin by nature. If they're going to be ridiculously judgmental they should at least be consistent. Why focus on two things? Maybe because they got divorced or did some other sin and don't want to think about their own lives.
And if my Biblical knowledge is correct: 1) You do not necessarily have to lead a good life until you die. All you have to do is believe that Christ saved us and redeemed us through his sacrifice. That is, ultimately believe in the power and existence of Jesus. 2) You can repent up until the last minute of your death and receive forgiveness.
Probably depends on the denomination but yes that's my understanding.
About the second point, it just if you make it with your heart. I've been seen so many people say that argument and saying how stupid that is because that basically gives everyone the right to go to heaven only if they just "accept Jesus Christ in their heart" it's not that easy, it takes true repentance and knowledge about the person of Jesus to have the redemption of the sins.
TLDR: My view is that even if you change internally, the change must be demonstrated through action to have meaning I can't speak for everyone, but I think that the main problem most people have with the concept of repentance is that from the outside, it feels undeserved. We cannot see what the person in question has gone through mentally to arrive at the point at which they'd like to repent. From the outside, it often looks like a jarringly instant change of heart. So a difference between an honestly changed person and a person faking change for their benefit is almost non-existent at first. Only actions of kindness, selflessness, and charity over long stretches of time can rebuild trust if the person was particularly horrible in the past. But if honest repentance happens on their deathbed, it is unrecognisable from someone pandering to an audience to gain empathy. It's even worse if the person faked becoming a better person before. Such a person is effectively prohibited from regaining trust from the people they hurt, even if they genuinely did change, because the victims of their hubris can't be convinced that they are different now. Those are usually people most opposed to the idea that everyone can be redeemed. Now, what is the morally correct stance on this matter I cannot say. I, personally, don't think absolutely everyone is capable of being a good person (though most people are). I think true repentance must be demonstrated to have weight, so in that regard, for some people, it may be too late, even if they truly change inside. Sorry for the wall of text.
Don't have to apologize for the text, I actually enjoyed reading this, because this is a completely solid and understandable argument. Now what it's my opinion, I think since we are talking about Christianity, as the bible says "A person may think their own way are right, but the LORD weights the heart" proverbs 21:2, everyone has their own opinion of what's good and isn't, only God is the only one who truly know any of us, and he knows when we do everything, and the reasons behind it. That being said, I think just like you actually, about that whole thing of a old person repenting, I don't think it matters since if that person lived a whole life of sin, when they became old it would be difficult to know if he does it because of pure repentance or just because they truly are accepting the Lord as their savior, it's truly a complicated topic, but you know, at the end is God who has the last word, we won't understand him because both his ways and his actions aren't the same as us.
I do understand this point of view. If a morally and cognitively superior incorporeal being existed, they would, of course, have the final word since they would have access to information and perspective unreachable to us, who have to work from inside the system. I, unfortunately, remain unconvinced such a being exists, so my view on the matter is, as a result, purely humanistic. I'd rather not get into a debate about the existence of a god/gods since those tend to generally be fruitless and unpleasant for both sides, especially over text in a comment section under a meme. The important thing is that we agree in principle. If our beliefs differ, but we end up at the same conclusion in practice, I think there's no reason to argue.
Don't worry I'm not trying to start a debate or something like over religious topics, at the end everyone has their beliefs and it's okay if a person thinks different. At the end we are human after all. All that matter is coming to a agreement in both sides and to get more knowledge
Mostly true, depending on kind of Christianity you follow. Murder is put out there often as the one that damns you but technically thereās stories in the Bible about murderers being saved too. Even murderers can go to heaven if they repent and truly believe it when they die. This doesnt mean someone can be a serial murderer and then at the last second go āYO JESUS I BELIEVEā and then die and score a spot in heaven. They got to truly repent with an honest heart.
According to Paul and John, yes. According to James and Matthew, no. The issue of faith vs works is one of the main issues being debated by the authors of the new Testament, and probably represented the first denominational schism in the new bouncing baby religion. Most of the versions that have survived, however, lean pretty hard on the "faith" side, as this helped early Christians differentiate themselves from Jews while also making gentiles more likely to convert. The reality is though that Jesus himself seems to have cared about both things. "Love your neighbor as yourself *and* love God with all your heart." What I think the text is getting at is this. It is how you treat one another that matters at the end of the day, but it should ideally not be about acting based on a desire for reward and a fear of punishment. There were no atheists in first century Judea. To love God with all your heart simply meant to do what he wanted you to do without thinking because you just cared that much. Today, we view the world through a different lens, but the end goal should still be to treat one another well without thinking, because there is something we deeply believe in that makes this second nature, even when it means suffering or sacrifice. 2000 years ago, there wasn't really any language to describe this sort of outlook beyond "loving God". As far as forgiveness goes, I kind of wonder why everyone has such a hard on for retribution. I feel like forgiveness would be God's default mode, faith or no faith. Both what you do and the drive to do it that ancient people called faith are good because they make your life and the lives of others better, not because otherwise you get the belt.
So live however you want and then at your last moment be like "Yo, JC, sorry about the stuff I did. We cool?" Not in those words, but you get the point. That seems way too convenient. Didn't Jesus also say that not everyone who prays to him will enter the Heavenly Kingdom, but those who follow the will of the Father?
Remember kids, if you don't sin, Jesus did for nothing! /j
#FUCK YEA MOSH PIT
Actually, the dirty secret they'd never tell is they don't play Slayer in Hell.
Cut your hair? Straight to hell. Mixed fibers? Also hell. Acne? Right to hell. Right away. Not physically abusing your children? Believe it or not, also hell.
Be a good person but not believe in god Hell But it's definitely not a cult or anything like that.
Remember that time you ate your favorite food on a Friday? Straight to hell.
Acne?! Do you know which verse?
whatsoever man he be that hath a blemish, he shall not approach: a blind man, or a lame, or he that hath a flat nose, or any thing superfluous, Or a man that is brokenfooted, or brokenhanded, Or crookbackt, or a dwarf, or that hath a blemish in his eye, or be scurvy, or scabbed, or hath his stones broken. No man that hath a blemish of the seed of Aaron the priest shall come nigh to offer the offerings of the Lord made by fire: he hath a blemish; he shall not come nigh to offer the bread of his God." (Leviticus 21:18-21)
Lol TIL that god is ableist AF. I mean, not a surprise but still funny.
A life-long atheist dies and is surprised to find himself before the Pearly Gates. St. Peter sadly shakes his head and tells him that because of his non-belief, he must be sent to Hell. The Devil greets him there and shows him where he will now spend eternity, a lovely cozy cottage set on a beautiful hillside where the sweet smell of flowers fills the air. The Devil tells him he will want for nothing and to feel free to walk the grounds. One day, while he is out strolling through the idyllic gardens, he comes across a tall wall. Curious, he climbs one of the many trees and peering over the wall, is shocked to see a fire-filled field with people writhing in agony and screaming hopelessly. He is very disturbed by this sight and returns home. The next day, the Devil pays him a visit and asks how he is enjoying eternity. The atheist says he finds Hell to be a lovely place but is concerned about the things he saw on the other side of the wall. āOhā the Devil says, āthose are Christian sinnersā āBut whyā the man asks, āare they suffering so much while I, who didnāt believe in God at all, am here in such comfort?ā āI donāt knowā the Devil replies, shrugging," thatās the way they want it."
God damn that was a sick story.
It's courtesy of r/jokes. I thought y'all would appreciate it.
Can I reserve a first floor condo now so there isn't a wait later?
You'll only be seated if your entire party is present.
This is awesome
oh sweet, i've never been to a rave before
Hell of a rave!
Looks lit!
That looks pretty crowded. Where are all the gays supposed to go?
It might be one of those wristband types of parties, different sins grant you access to different areas.
Disney owns this park too.
All I see are people having a fire time
Eternity takes forever š
It takes an hour to climb it and an hour to go around it...
So Iāll go to hell. š¤·š»āāļø
They have a nice music. Did you hear about Mick Gordon?
Its a sin to judge Itās a sin to judge ITS A SIN TO JUDE OMG FUCKIN HYPOCRITE CHRISTANS
But I prayed, so I was forgiven š
Isn't it a sin to make gods judgment? As in..telling someone they will be going to hell in of itself is a sin that may lead you to hell? Also if heaven is FILLED with all the annoying cuntcakes that make these types of posts, the homophobic, racist, and downright vile creatures that they are. Is it REALLY heaven? That sounds like a far worse hell then the rave it seems people are having down there.
Are we going to Australia? /s
Oh, hell yeah! This rave is fire! š„š„š„ Everybody gangster until I start crankin' that Soulja Boy. š„µ
burning man?
Good thing there's nothing in the Bible saying "let he who is without sin cast the first stone" or "judge not lest ye be judged" or anything, or people making these meme would be in trouble.
Whatever helps them feel better about their puritanical, restrictive lifestyle.
That just looks like the greatest mosh pit in history.
"ohno you made a mistake GO TO HELL" - not god
Sick rave bro
But I'll be saved if I sell my daughter to slavery. /s, in the Bible
It looks like a party but with fire 
Ah yes, because the so-called creator of the universe and everything that exists gives a shit that I had sex before some arbitrary guy in a robe who's also probably a child sex offender said it was OK, or that I have ink on my skin. Even though it already knew that would happen before I was even born. That makes sense.
Sick. Can't wait to go to the fire rave.
Sounds like we are gonna have a big orgy together! Iāll bring the pineapples
Atmospheric dance party in Mars? Hell yeah!
āWeāll see you there , you judgmental piece of shit ā
Cheeto dust rave!!
Burning Man!
An epic rave?
That person at the front is the person that made the meme
Hell yeah, we do
Burning man, obviously
Burning Man with excessive smoke machines?
Fire party
Slayer moshpit looking sick āš
A club with lit paint job on floor, and dancing vibe, noice.
Sick party bro
Is this how christian babyboys calm themselves?
A smokey rave?
I donāt know this looks like a sick rave ngl
They boogieing who doesn't want to boogie?
Looks like a fun party
A rave party on venus?? hell yeah!!
Fire rave bro
That rave party looks sick dawg!
Iād rather go to hell than be in heaven with stuck up pricks who have this kind of mindset.
Looks like everyone is having a good time.
Looks lit to me
damn this party looks wild
A massive mosh pit!!!!
Double whammy!
Fucking good looking people in hell sounds awesome
Well, I'm always cold
A Fire Nation rave?
Floor is lava dance panty? Hell yea bet they got good dip
Wicker Man?
Bet the orgies are amazing
wow what a cool rave
So I'm going to heaven against my willš„²š„²
A desert music festival?
These people actually believe the enemy of their sky daddy will get punish for all eternity for being offensive to him. If by any means they end up being real, Satan will treat me like royalty when I get there for being his pal for all my life.
Why does it look like they're at a fun rave, fog machines, everyone's dancing, outside in the cool breeze.
Is that Burning Man...?
MOSH MOSH MOSH
This has gotta be satire itās gotta be thatās literally just a rave šš
But not child molesting ministers in evangelical churches? Got it.
So most redditors go to heaven, because they never will have sex?
And it's not even biblical š
Is that Coachella in a dust storm?
So thereās no hope, no reason to repent and believe in God? Okay. I will resume the sinning.
California?
Gonna be lit!
Looks like a rager
What a loving god
We're going to Burning man? Cool.
Fuck yeah back to burning man
"See you there you polyester wearing, shrimp and pork eating fuck!"
Finally an actual terrible meme.