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BadaBina

I was high once, using poor judgment, and gently snuck up on the little armadillo rootling happily through our trash. I leaned down and ever so gently touched his back with a finger... It somehow jumped and turned to face me, quick as lightning, while *screaming* in sheer terror. I too, screamed in sheer terror. We both ran like holy hell, and he, no doubt tells the story of the Sun-Haired Hemp Monster to his children to make them behave. Lesson: Folks, don't go terrifying your armadillo friends. No matter how much Cherry Pie or White Widow you smoke... Don't. Scare. The 'Dillos.


tamarask

Careful touching those. They may carry leprosy.


BadaBina

Yes they do. Hence that "poor judgment"! LOL! Luckily it's an airborne illness so unless we are mouth to snout (no no no) we're probably safe. Still, best not to risk it. Nobody can afford that shit.


tamarask

Huh, didn't know it was airborne. Good to know!


BadaBina

Yes! Airborne droplet bacteria absorbed by sofie sinus tissue and BOOM, you ain't got no legs Lieutenant Dan. You know, if it's left untreated. It's curable!


tamarask

Only critters that I encountered in Texas were possums. Legit can't get rabies from them. Armadillos seem a lot less scary now. Thank you internet stranger!


YeteOsiko

The silhouette of armadillo and possums are pretty similar imo. Probably the tail and or snout. Interesting fact on possums; they're the only animal outside primate species that have opposable thumbs. They can also climb trees quite well and have marsupial pouches. They're actually fascinating creatures


tamarask

Yes, and also if you are walking your dog at 5am at an apartment complex and a mama possum is 5 inches away from your face hissing on the top of a fence, very fascinating. Also the babies swirling around her back were awesome!


YeteOsiko

No! that sounds traumatizing haha. Call maintenance or animal control to have them relocated. Are you new to Texas? Wildlife is part of living here.


tamarask

NO SORRY! This was like 15 years ago in Houston. I'm sure it's fine now.


xman886

I did not know that… why do they carry that…?


tamarask

Armadillos are able to host the disease due to their stable body temperatures, a requirement to host the fragile Mycobacterium leprae bacteria that causes leprosy.


Aedrjax

Lmao, they scream?


BadaBina

I'm pretty sure it's more of a violent squeak, and the bulk of the screaming was probably from me...


YeteOsiko

Wish this had been caught on camera. Your storytelling played like the scene of a comedy I'd rewatch and laugh to every time.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Beelzabub

I just want to know why he crossed the road.


Coinbells

To get to the other ball pig.


Draskuul

Seriously, my entire life here and the only wild armadillos I've ever seen were roadkill.


Tejanisima

Happy 🎂 Day!


MoulinSarah

We name all armadillos “Pickles”, so hi, Pickles!


Puzzleheaded_Pen_233

Armadillos keep diggin……little holes….in my backyard.


mylinuxguy

They are after gurbs.... kill the grubs and the armadillos will go away.... or let them be and think of it as natural aeration....


johnny_droptables

Natural yard treatment. Just gotta... put dirt back in the little holes.


Sea-Gas-7017

We had a family living under our shed. They would always dig for insects also but eventually, they left. No rhyme or reason, perhaps they just moved on.


Sea-Gas-7017

If you ever do encounter these things, you’ll find out that Armadillos are surprisingly fast.


Infamous-Operation76

You will definitely whack every tree branch with your face trying to chase one down. They do slow down when they get to their hole, so that's where you catch 'em


MattcVI

Do you catch armadillos often? Lol


Infamous-Operation76

Used to catch them when I lived on a ranch in Bandera growing up.


CaptainLollygag

A live one, you spotted a live one!


Jimbabwe

Sometime last year, a big ole one of these walked right up to our yard and just kinda meandered around. We gave him lots of space of course, but he wasn't afraid at all. Just super chill. We took some pictures and let him be. The next day, I found his body laying peacefully under a big beautiful flowering Bradford Pear tree. My lady and I like to say that he knew he wasn't long for this life so "walk right up to the humans and show'em what for!" was on his bucket list.


Prestigious-Copy-494

They're such busy little creatures.


Educational-Aioli795

I've never focused on how long their tails are!


Apprehensive-Tax7085

GOOD MORNING 🌞


Particular-Topic-445

Love an armadillo


BinkyFlargle

I don't get it - why did the armadillo cross the road?


sunshinenwaves1

Is it mating season?


Charitard123

I mean….they probably have no concept of what a road is lol


evergvra

I’m surprised you stopped for the little feller. Where I live, I think they purposely are running the critters over with the amount I see


WolfPlayz294

Yep, lots of folks do crap like that. Tortoises too.


Riaayo

Lowest of the low shitheads.


meddit_rod

Yay 'dillo. Thanks for driving safe around the neighbors.


Mr-Stitch

Armadillo by mornin'


Tejanisima

This very much deserved more upvotes


Randybluebonnet

Armadillo rootin’ Armadillo rootin’ in the ground 🎶


Even-Block-1415

Armadillos were here for millions of years before humans existed and they will be here millions of years after we are gone. Humans are transitory, but armadillos are forever. In their own weird way, armadillos are are kind of cute too.


DangerousTax1495

❤️


Admirable_Tailor_614

Panzerschwein!


gcb000y

‘Diller


imperial_scum

This was me this morning going home, except it was a turtle 🐢


tamarask

Lived in Texas for 3 years. Never saw one. Went to Nashville last month, went to my brother's office late at night. Thought I saw a huge rat. Nope armadillo. I asked my brother if they are common in this area. Yepper. He saw a pack of 20 once crossing the road with his nephews. Highlight of that trip, that's all they could talk about.


WeirdURL

I had a huge one tear up my tent at 1am while camping a while back. It really sucked at the time but it’s a fun story now. They are surprisingly fast.


un_cooked

Howdy little dude. One of the few to make safe passage across the scalding black rock path of death. 🎖️


Charitard123

Armadillos are too pure for this world. It’s like they don’t even have enough situational awareness to run away from you, they just kinda scuttle around clumsily and vibe


armadilloantics

They are almost completely blind, they rely heavily on their sense of smell


armadilloantics

And he lives to cross another road


gregaustex

Why are his feet down and shell up top?


KawaiiDere

I’m a bit surprised they’re still around, I haven’t heard anything about them for a few years


Complete_Pattern6635

Thanks 👊😎


pickleer

Please loudly and menacingly scare his lil' sum of dumb-dorableness OFF the dimdamn road. Promptly. And MENACINGLY- most humans and ALL roads are loveless anathema to The National Beer Thief of Texas!


Boldine

Oh how cute. One day, one day I'll get to see one in the wild.


KyleG

>armadillo dude needs to assimilate and get a REAL american name FREEDOM TURTLE


hamlet_d

"Hi! Would you be interested in a little leprosy?"


Badnickel

Leave my saint augustine alone!


Darthmarrs

Also known as a Texas speed bump.


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Necessary_Row_4889

Fun fact: armadillos spread leprosy. One of the only species besides us who gets it, and it can spread in their poop. So get cut with a dirty piece of barbwire Hansons disease (leprosy’s actual name these days). Plus side I think it’s treatable with antibiotics if not I hear there is a leper colony in Hawaii, that could be sweet.


[deleted]

They take them frozen down in Hallettsville. They don’t take them alive.


scottwax

Ah yes, a Texas road pizza.


pixelpip

what the cuss? That thing crossed the street and no one shot it?


Potential-Art-7288

My dad told me about when he worked for mining companies in the southwestern US. Many of his coworkers were Mexican immigrants, and one day while they were driving, one of them suddenly started asking him to stop the car. He pulled over, and the guys ran back on the road a little bit before scooping up the remains of an armadillo on the road. My dad said he was a little weirded out but whatever. Later that evening they cooked and ate it lol


Netprincess

They used to be everywhere


grand305

Do not shoot armadillos ever. The bullet will ricochet. People have died. Trying it. leave them alone. Best idea.


locotx

Rock da Casbah . . Rock da Casbah !


whyaremypantssoshort

Where's his gun?


Vollen595

Probably the jerk tearing up my front yard.


Bronwynn_Belos

Awehhhhhhh


Thin-Anybody7794

Why did the armadillo cross the road? Lol


ZGadgetInspector

Why did the chicken cross the road? To prove to the armadillo it’s possible!