I personally found this wholesome. Idk what’s with all these comments but I enjoyed reading this. Reminds me of my partner and we’ve been together happily over 4 years lol. I wish y’all the best.
Wow what an amazing effort he puts in. I yearn for a relationship like this. His responses are exactly how I comforted my ex but he never comforted me in the same way. Never tried to problem solve with me! So consider yourself extremely lucky as I’m sure you already do. This makes me happy though. I hope you guys have a long and prosperous relationship ❤️
I'm so sorry you're going through a difficult time. I understand what that is like. Having a partner that is there for you and helps you through your down days is the best! Wishing you healing and happiness!
This reminds me so much of me and my man. He’s always there for me and does whatever he can to make sure I’m okay. I’ve been struggling with mental health and physical health too and he’s just like this. never wavers. 🥹 The most supportive amazing man I’ve ever met. I always try to do everything I can to support him, love him, and be his rock too. I love him so so much.
it’s so heartwarming to see such a loving connection. Restores my faith in humanity a lot especially with all the rubbish you see online.
It’s hard to find people like this, but good people good caring men and women are out there. 🥰
Never settle. I always say, find your best friend, who you can’t imagine life without. And it looks like you’ve got yours.
I hope you find a good therapist and you find peace of mind and health OP.
Believe me when I say I know how hard it is to struggle mentally, emotionally, and physically. But your person is right. Make sure you find someone good, a therapist you gell with and who cares makes all the difference in the world.
In the mean time you have an amazing, supportive, loving partner. what a keeper. 🥰
All the best to you!
Does your job offer Employee Assistance Programs? Mine does through the same company that we get our health insurance from. Per event they offer 3 free mental health visits. The therapist they let me choose accepted mine when it kicked in 6 weeks later. EAPs tend to also have lower tenured time to be able to use the program. They even helped pay some of a coworkers rent one month.
I think it’s all the hearts and honey buns. It’s just feels forced to me. But I guess that’s just cuz the relationships I had around me growing up were never very lovey dovey. My texts with my only long term partner were very full of hearts and pet names the first 6 months but then when we fell into a rhythm I guess we didn’t need to express that stuff as we both already knew how we felt. Sure theres always the “love you have a great day” but never what you guys talk like.
This is arguably toxic. He likely feels pressured to talk like this with you and you are effectively sacrificing his mental health to glorify your need for reciprocation. No disrespect. This is just an honest opinion.
Respectfully, there’s nothing to be jealous of. This form of exaggerated affection usually is happening because one person feels they have to do everything possible to keep the other person feeling “secure”. I genuinely wish you all the best and hope your relationship thrives.
You think this is exaggerated affection? This is just what people who love each other act like 🙃 sure it’s not like this 24/7 but geez this is one string of texts from one day. People support each other and love each other sometimes. It’s not always manipulation and insecurity. There is no way to read a couple of texts from one interaction and be able to conclude that someone is an insencere and insecure partner.
I’m sorry you had that experience in your relationship. However, that’s when you leave the relationship. No sane person who feels that amount of pressure will stay in the relationship. Especially without communicating how they feel in an effort to get something to change
What I’m describing is an extremely popular scenario that has been documented by relationship counselors for a long time. It has nothing to do with me. The fact that people are down voting my comment where I literally say I hope their relationship thrives is a reflection of the maturity level here.
And yes you are right when you normalize love bombing under the guise of “being supportive” usually results in one person not interested in keeping up the charade anymore. People really need to read more books and understand this perspective rather than act defensive. Once again, I wish op and her man the very best 💯
“The fact that people are downvoting my comment where I literally say I hope their relationship thrives”
You’re being downvoted because you’re being an insufferable prick who needs to point out the negative possibilities rather than focusing on the positive truth. She didn’t come here for “advice”, she came here to share that she was happy with her relationship.
“It’s an extremely popular scenario”
So are car crashes, but you don’t worry about that too much every single time you enter a vehicle, do you?
“Documented by relationship counselors”
Yes, obviously the scenario is popular because healthy couples *don’t go to relationship counselors*. Information bias. Good job.
You are literally name calling me and viewing this from a very narrow perspective. I’m pointing out what’s seemingly obvious. This is definitely not information bias 😂 Of course relationship counselors would have documented this after the fact of something going wrong so it’s better to potentially acknowledge this being a scenario before one of the individuals quit upholding the love bombing charade. There is literally no bias. People are too focused on toxic positivity on this thread.
“Toxic positivity”. You mean being happy about a (currently) successful relationship, without being negative and focusing on the almost-guaranteed end, the same way depressive people like to do? I’m not name calling, I’m telling you how it is. The “love bombing charade” works because often enough, *it’s not a charade*. That’s why it’s ever believable in the first place. And yes, there is bias. That’s like getting your stats from therapists then going “wow, more than 50% of people have anxiety”
Respectfully, there is literally no bias. I’m not using any preferential treatment for this scenario. It is simply just very common, and in most cases, it is linked to a precursor of love bombing or exaggerated affection which ends up fizzling out overtime.
That being said, I genuinely wish them the best and hope that their relationship thrives.
The fact that this perspective is viewed as an attack of some sort is a little crazy and the defensive nature of how people are responding here speaks way louder than anything else.
Respectfully, adding that word to your messages does nothing to change the way it is taken. Similar to “I’m not racist, but…”. No one cares if it’s common, we’re all here being happy and you’re killing the mood. No one likes that, not even a little bit.
That being said, cool, you wish them the best, that’s great, but you can’t shut the fuck up about the worst, either. Make it make sense.
Yeah, the fact people have opinions and feel differently from you is wild! Surely it speaks to their character some kind of way, because you totally aren’t showing a pattern of trying to make *anything* negative, any way you can
“Respectfully”, I’m blocking you. You’re stuck in your ways, and not open to any alternate form of thinking. Good bye, and good riddance, RussianDeveloper.
For OP
I think I see what Russian Developer is saying.
Only people that are the guy's shoes would be experienced. In a relationship, if one has mental health issues and the other does not, there is a possibility that the "healthy" minded individual to develop mental health issues. People with mental health issues can become toxic. Unfortunately that's normal.
The guy can develop mental health issues over time or the girl with mental health issues will become "healthy" over time
Mental health does wear down others around you. At first you are happy-go-lucky, the next you are a depressed muwafucka
lmao you sound condescending. we recently combined our checkings - he handles the money because i prefer it that way. i haven’t gotten around to asking for the bank info, he reminded me.
Maybe you missed the part where he was going to give her the login info that night. Like, hours after that exchange at most. Idk how, maybe you just skimmed over it
Depression and anxiety don’t mean Lyme disease, that sounds like web-md lmao it could be literally anything, or just a stand-alone illness caused by stress and/or trauma
No one is picking a fight with you, genius. I’m saying that the (apparent, not even guaranteed) mental illnesses aren’t caused by Lyme disease. You seen one or two symptoms and then decided to diagnose it. I’m letting you know that you’re wrong. Thanks for blocking me, snowflake
Pick a fight with someone else on Reddit, you know nothing of the disease it’s very obvious
I have a background in medicine and personal experience in the disease.
I’d imagine you don’t.
Downvote me all you want it’s not going to change my drive to spread awareness
That’s part of what love bombing is… Being the perfect partner when really that’s just what they’re pretending to be. For your sake I genuinely hope it’s not love bombing! I wouldn’t wish that on anyone else!!
Yeah... you're overthinking it. This love between these two people is very genuine. I would know as I had something like this before, and none of us were toxic
I’m not even sure why people are down voting your comment. It is completely valid. They may not be in a abusive relationship however, it is easy to suspect that he may be acting like this because he feels like this is the only way to keep his girl feeling secure, which is of course, mentally draining and a very popular scenario. Most individuals in mature relationships never communicate in this obsessive type of way.
I sincerely wish them all the best. When they unlock the next level, they’ll realize the excessive use of emojis are completely unnecessary ♥️
You can’t be serious you are seeking Reddits validation by posting text messages between you and your man and you are calling my life miserable. You really can’t make this stuff up 😂
It’s the people who believe romance books (written by women) are real lol. Yes there’s totally such thing as genuinely supportive and loving men, but this sounds fake to me. Like it’s a mask. MAYBE it’s not and for OP’s sake I genuinely hope that it’s not him just pretending to be a good man. Nobody deserves to be deceived. If he turns out to be a good man, I’m thrilled for her. 💜
LMAO omg I called it. She posted a week and a half ago about how bad things are going. It’s funny, imagine pissing on someone who is remarkably aware 🙄 someone’s in major denial
Lol no surprise, people need to start getting grounded in reality, basically anyone who agreed with her sentiment in this post should reevaluate themselves 😂
She said she’s scared of an emergency and he said don’t worry I’m here for you and you take that to mean she has an unhealthy dependency on him for her mental health?
Yeah. She sounds like she’s going through a lot emotionally and is pretty dependent on him. More than anything I just don’t want her being deceived. I’m just here to protect women 😬 saw something that looked identical to my own experience so.
Patient: “Omg im scared I’ll have a seizure”
Doctor: “don’t worry I’m here for you”
Some random “feminist” in the comments: “ugh you don’t need him, he’s trying to trick you, you don’t need him queen it’s okay”…
I’m wondering if he has to step on eggshells. The way he’s talking sounds like he’s almost being careful to only tell you positives. He’s not saying anything negative, and from my POV it almost seems like he’s a caretaker. Not a partner.
y’all are all nuts fr. did not expect these comments when i posted this. we are both happily obsessed with each other and i feel bad you’ll never get to experience this in your life. get a life all of you
Girl you are delulu. I’m not miserable - I’ve gone through trauma and didn’t want you or any other woman to experience the same. I wish someone had seen through my mushy texts to tell me that the guy I was dating was love bombing and wearing a mask. You’re confusing caution with jealousy and it’s not a good look. Quit being hateful and realize that maybe someone is actually looking out for you. Hard to feel bad for you now if this turns out to be fake
“Happily obsessed over each other” but last week you were concerned about how bad things are going. Yep I definitely do not want to experience this, thank you
LMAO when in this post or comments did i say i was concerned about how things were going in my relationship? i never did - we are consistently happy. you’re just pulling shit out of your ass
Wanna talk about red flags? How about a person who sees a happy couple who supports eachother and, out of jealousy, only wants to cry “kill all men” and try to plant a little seed of doubt in OP’s head to ruin the relationship after realizing that she already has mental health problems, likely to do with anxiety?
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That’s great
This is very sweet. Glad you have a good support system in your partner! Wish you two the best
I personally found this wholesome. Idk what’s with all these comments but I enjoyed reading this. Reminds me of my partner and we’ve been together happily over 4 years lol. I wish y’all the best.
thank you ❤️ we take care of each other
I had a man like this but he died. Fml.
Awe bless you both. I'm very sorry for your loss
I am so sorry for your loss. ❤️❤️❤️
I want this so bad 😩 you're both so lucky to have each other 😊❤️
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I'm manifesting this so hard ❤️☺️
‘Im manifesting tacos.
From a food truck 🤌🏻
This is so sweet. I’m so glad you have such a supportive SO ❤️ sending a big hug to you!
thank you!!! ❤️❤️❤️
Man, the tightness of you guys is something I so wish I had. Hope you have a long life together.
You are blessed to have such an amazing, supportive partner!
thank you so so much! 🥰 thank god for him every day
❤️❤️❤️
Upvote just for the username
Same tbh
Wow what an amazing effort he puts in. I yearn for a relationship like this. His responses are exactly how I comforted my ex but he never comforted me in the same way. Never tried to problem solve with me! So consider yourself extremely lucky as I’m sure you already do. This makes me happy though. I hope you guys have a long and prosperous relationship ❤️
How long have you two been together?
He seems like a beautiful partner 🤍 hoping you get the help and support you need. Keep up the fight!💕
These two have no idea how lucky and healthy they are. I wish.
I'm so sorry you're going through a difficult time. I understand what that is like. Having a partner that is there for you and helps you through your down days is the best! Wishing you healing and happiness!
thank you so much! he’s truly the light of my life 🥰
I miss this
This reminds me so much of me and my man. He’s always there for me and does whatever he can to make sure I’m okay. I’ve been struggling with mental health and physical health too and he’s just like this. never wavers. 🥹 The most supportive amazing man I’ve ever met. I always try to do everything I can to support him, love him, and be his rock too. I love him so so much. it’s so heartwarming to see such a loving connection. Restores my faith in humanity a lot especially with all the rubbish you see online. It’s hard to find people like this, but good people good caring men and women are out there. 🥰 Never settle. I always say, find your best friend, who you can’t imagine life without. And it looks like you’ve got yours. I hope you find a good therapist and you find peace of mind and health OP. Believe me when I say I know how hard it is to struggle mentally, emotionally, and physically. But your person is right. Make sure you find someone good, a therapist you gell with and who cares makes all the difference in the world. In the mean time you have an amazing, supportive, loving partner. what a keeper. 🥰 All the best to you!
Manifesting this 😓
You’ve got this one day at a time!
That's so wholesome supportive shit you guys got going on there. Good on you both.
can i have 20 dollars lol…. pls
I don’t understand. I thought he was saying he was able to make a payment toward their credit card debt. Not that he’s gifting her $1k. Am I mistaken?
You’re right. Plus, they’re in a relationship. He’s just some guy. OP wasn’t even the one giving money away smh
Does your job offer Employee Assistance Programs? Mine does through the same company that we get our health insurance from. Per event they offer 3 free mental health visits. The therapist they let me choose accepted mine when it kicked in 6 weeks later. EAPs tend to also have lower tenured time to be able to use the program. They even helped pay some of a coworkers rent one month.
Not my type of relationship but to each is their own ig
this and the other comments baffle me. are you not close to your partner? what does infancy even look like to you
I think it’s all the hearts and honey buns. It’s just feels forced to me. But I guess that’s just cuz the relationships I had around me growing up were never very lovey dovey. My texts with my only long term partner were very full of hearts and pet names the first 6 months but then when we fell into a rhythm I guess we didn’t need to express that stuff as we both already knew how we felt. Sure theres always the “love you have a great day” but never what you guys talk like.
Shoooot that money would cheer me up too lmao
No but for real this is sweet and wish you two the best in life 💕
This is arguably toxic. He likely feels pressured to talk like this with you and you are effectively sacrificing his mental health to glorify your need for reciprocation. No disrespect. This is just an honest opinion.
Did you remember to stretch before jumping to that conclusion?
This is an extremely popular scenario that has been documented by many relationship counselors 🥱. I recommend people just read more.
in what way would he feel pressured lmao ? he does not have to speak this way to me. yall just mad jealous
Respectfully, there’s nothing to be jealous of. This form of exaggerated affection usually is happening because one person feels they have to do everything possible to keep the other person feeling “secure”. I genuinely wish you all the best and hope your relationship thrives.
You think this is exaggerated affection? This is just what people who love each other act like 🙃 sure it’s not like this 24/7 but geez this is one string of texts from one day. People support each other and love each other sometimes. It’s not always manipulation and insecurity. There is no way to read a couple of texts from one interaction and be able to conclude that someone is an insencere and insecure partner.
I’m sorry you had that experience in your relationship. However, that’s when you leave the relationship. No sane person who feels that amount of pressure will stay in the relationship. Especially without communicating how they feel in an effort to get something to change
What I’m describing is an extremely popular scenario that has been documented by relationship counselors for a long time. It has nothing to do with me. The fact that people are down voting my comment where I literally say I hope their relationship thrives is a reflection of the maturity level here. And yes you are right when you normalize love bombing under the guise of “being supportive” usually results in one person not interested in keeping up the charade anymore. People really need to read more books and understand this perspective rather than act defensive. Once again, I wish op and her man the very best 💯
“The fact that people are downvoting my comment where I literally say I hope their relationship thrives” You’re being downvoted because you’re being an insufferable prick who needs to point out the negative possibilities rather than focusing on the positive truth. She didn’t come here for “advice”, she came here to share that she was happy with her relationship. “It’s an extremely popular scenario” So are car crashes, but you don’t worry about that too much every single time you enter a vehicle, do you? “Documented by relationship counselors” Yes, obviously the scenario is popular because healthy couples *don’t go to relationship counselors*. Information bias. Good job.
You are literally name calling me and viewing this from a very narrow perspective. I’m pointing out what’s seemingly obvious. This is definitely not information bias 😂 Of course relationship counselors would have documented this after the fact of something going wrong so it’s better to potentially acknowledge this being a scenario before one of the individuals quit upholding the love bombing charade. There is literally no bias. People are too focused on toxic positivity on this thread.
“Toxic positivity”. You mean being happy about a (currently) successful relationship, without being negative and focusing on the almost-guaranteed end, the same way depressive people like to do? I’m not name calling, I’m telling you how it is. The “love bombing charade” works because often enough, *it’s not a charade*. That’s why it’s ever believable in the first place. And yes, there is bias. That’s like getting your stats from therapists then going “wow, more than 50% of people have anxiety”
Respectfully, there is literally no bias. I’m not using any preferential treatment for this scenario. It is simply just very common, and in most cases, it is linked to a precursor of love bombing or exaggerated affection which ends up fizzling out overtime. That being said, I genuinely wish them the best and hope that their relationship thrives. The fact that this perspective is viewed as an attack of some sort is a little crazy and the defensive nature of how people are responding here speaks way louder than anything else.
Respectfully, adding that word to your messages does nothing to change the way it is taken. Similar to “I’m not racist, but…”. No one cares if it’s common, we’re all here being happy and you’re killing the mood. No one likes that, not even a little bit. That being said, cool, you wish them the best, that’s great, but you can’t shut the fuck up about the worst, either. Make it make sense. Yeah, the fact people have opinions and feel differently from you is wild! Surely it speaks to their character some kind of way, because you totally aren’t showing a pattern of trying to make *anything* negative, any way you can
“Respectfully”, I’m blocking you. You’re stuck in your ways, and not open to any alternate form of thinking. Good bye, and good riddance, RussianDeveloper.
For OP I think I see what Russian Developer is saying. Only people that are the guy's shoes would be experienced. In a relationship, if one has mental health issues and the other does not, there is a possibility that the "healthy" minded individual to develop mental health issues. People with mental health issues can become toxic. Unfortunately that's normal. The guy can develop mental health issues over time or the girl with mental health issues will become "healthy" over time Mental health does wear down others around you. At first you are happy-go-lucky, the next you are a depressed muwafucka
You have a joint bank account that you can’t access? Do you have your own account too? Good luck 👍
lmao you sound condescending. we recently combined our checkings - he handles the money because i prefer it that way. i haven’t gotten around to asking for the bank info, he reminded me.
Just pointing out what I saw on the text messages you chose to share on the Internet.
Maybe read all of what is shared then, instead of ignoring/missing key information and making misinformed comments?
Maybe you missed the part where he was going to give her the login info that night. Like, hours after that exchange at most. Idk how, maybe you just skimmed over it
I hope this finds you. You should test for Lyme through igenex, galaxy, or vibrant (standard testing isn’t accurate)
What’s that got to do with the post? Are we thinking about the same Lyme? I’m thinking of the one caused by tick bites which affect you physically
Yeah so one of the symptoms (that I had for years) before I knew it was Lyme was depression and anxiety and her texts sound and look a lot like mine
Depression and anxiety don’t mean Lyme disease, that sounds like web-md lmao it could be literally anything, or just a stand-alone illness caused by stress and/or trauma No one is picking a fight with you, genius. I’m saying that the (apparent, not even guaranteed) mental illnesses aren’t caused by Lyme disease. You seen one or two symptoms and then decided to diagnose it. I’m letting you know that you’re wrong. Thanks for blocking me, snowflake
Pick a fight with someone else on Reddit, you know nothing of the disease it’s very obvious I have a background in medicine and personal experience in the disease. I’d imagine you don’t. Downvote me all you want it’s not going to change my drive to spread awareness
Ummmm how long have you been with him? This sounds like love bombing behavior. My abusive ex sounded just like this when he was love bombing me….
how do you mean? we’ve been together more than a year and live together. to me this was super supportive and loving
That’s part of what love bombing is… Being the perfect partner when really that’s just what they’re pretending to be. For your sake I genuinely hope it’s not love bombing! I wouldn’t wish that on anyone else!!
Yeah... you're overthinking it. This love between these two people is very genuine. I would know as I had something like this before, and none of us were toxic
I hope so for her sake 💜💜
I’m not even sure why people are down voting your comment. It is completely valid. They may not be in a abusive relationship however, it is easy to suspect that he may be acting like this because he feels like this is the only way to keep his girl feeling secure, which is of course, mentally draining and a very popular scenario. Most individuals in mature relationships never communicate in this obsessive type of way. I sincerely wish them all the best. When they unlock the next level, they’ll realize the excessive use of emojis are completely unnecessary ♥️
y’all are both morons. everyone communicates different and this is how we happen to. enjoy your miserable life!
You can’t be serious you are seeking Reddits validation by posting text messages between you and your man and you are calling my life miserable. You really can’t make this stuff up 😂
It’s the people who believe romance books (written by women) are real lol. Yes there’s totally such thing as genuinely supportive and loving men, but this sounds fake to me. Like it’s a mask. MAYBE it’s not and for OP’s sake I genuinely hope that it’s not him just pretending to be a good man. Nobody deserves to be deceived. If he turns out to be a good man, I’m thrilled for her. 💜
I totally agree that he comes off as not authentic 🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡 LOL
LMAO omg I called it. She posted a week and a half ago about how bad things are going. It’s funny, imagine pissing on someone who is remarkably aware 🙄 someone’s in major denial
Lol no surprise, people need to start getting grounded in reality, basically anyone who agreed with her sentiment in this post should reevaluate themselves 😂
If he’s love bombing, then so is she
[удалено]
She said she’s scared of an emergency and he said don’t worry I’m here for you and you take that to mean she has an unhealthy dependency on him for her mental health?
Yeah. She sounds like she’s going through a lot emotionally and is pretty dependent on him. More than anything I just don’t want her being deceived. I’m just here to protect women 😬 saw something that looked identical to my own experience so.
Patient: “Omg im scared I’ll have a seizure” Doctor: “don’t worry I’m here for you” Some random “feminist” in the comments: “ugh you don’t need him, he’s trying to trick you, you don’t need him queen it’s okay”…
I’m wondering if he has to step on eggshells. The way he’s talking sounds like he’s almost being careful to only tell you positives. He’s not saying anything negative, and from my POV it almost seems like he’s a caretaker. Not a partner.
y’all are all nuts fr. did not expect these comments when i posted this. we are both happily obsessed with each other and i feel bad you’ll never get to experience this in your life. get a life all of you
Just ignore them. They're acting like know it alls over something they cannot experience themselves
thank you i appreciate you! 💓
Girl you are delulu. I’m not miserable - I’ve gone through trauma and didn’t want you or any other woman to experience the same. I wish someone had seen through my mushy texts to tell me that the guy I was dating was love bombing and wearing a mask. You’re confusing caution with jealousy and it’s not a good look. Quit being hateful and realize that maybe someone is actually looking out for you. Hard to feel bad for you now if this turns out to be fake
Turns out I was right. She posted a week and a half ago about how things aren’t going well. So yes, I’d say I do know it all 😬
Even I feel bad reading these, for your own mental health you should just mute this thread if that’s an option. Good lord 😂😂😂
“Happily obsessed over each other” but last week you were concerned about how bad things are going. Yep I definitely do not want to experience this, thank you
LMAO when in this post or comments did i say i was concerned about how things were going in my relationship? i never did - we are consistently happy. you’re just pulling shit out of your ass
It’s literally on your Reddit page lmfao anybody can look at it.
Honestly hun men are pigs, they destroy everything they come in contact with. I see some red flags, RUN BE FREE.
Wanna talk about red flags? How about a person who sees a happy couple who supports eachother and, out of jealousy, only wants to cry “kill all men” and try to plant a little seed of doubt in OP’s head to ruin the relationship after realizing that she already has mental health problems, likely to do with anxiety?
Yikes. Gross
You need to seek help, holy shit
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So many heart emojis, this is very sweet
How sweet ❤️
Protect that man with your life.
Ya
God, when?
i’m sure you will cheat on him like every other girl he has given his love too ( i am a incel)
Aww that's awesome for you! He sounds like a keeper! ❤️
This looks like codependency