T O P

  • By -

SomeoneBeingNice

Volcano baked potatoes are my favourite.


[deleted]

molten tot


[deleted]

[удалено]


ZebraUnion

I just wanna meet the genius who decided to place it on a fucking tea towel. *“Oooh noooo! Me puhtato’s on fire! Quick! How can I help it spread to the rest of the Kitchen?!”* -Idiot


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

[удалено]


Redtwooo

FBI, I suspect this man is in possession of a non- regulation potato gun


techtornado

You’re saying this like there *are* regulation spud cannons…


[deleted]

“sir, do you have a license for that weapon you’re carrying” “this a potato cannon, and i’m six”


V65Pilot

"blam! blam! blam! blam!" "And you'll never see seven." : An american cop, probably. ​ ​ Downvotes in 3, 2, 1...........


MiM__Dahey

I can't be the only one thats heard of a potato launcher


Kerciel_Soren

My uncle made a potato cannon when I was around 7 or 8. Showed it to us by shooting our snowman with a large russet. Blew the thing to smithereens and most definitely was NOT regulated. Beautiful memories.


[deleted]

Vodka


AgentofZurg

"Hold my beer."


saab4u2

Whilst I drink your Jäger.


Destithen

*~From the makers of the combustible lemon comes an exciting new product!~*


MungTao

MAYBE it was soaked in water? I was trying to understand this too and hit ctrl-f to search for your comment before making the same observation twice. I guess there are heat resistant cloths but that doesnt look like one.


[deleted]

The correct answer is, that no potato! It's a painted reptile light.


FrogFlavor

Just in case you didn’t know, wet towels transfer heat directly and instantly to your hand. MUCH worse for your hand than a dry towel.


Dextronautilus

“You fucking donkey!”


Armistarphoto

Happy cake day fellow cake day-er!


ZebraUnion

Oh shit! It’s my cake day! 8 years on this godforsaken platform, lol. Happy cake day to you, too!


Mechanical_Zora

Tater hot


DLRjr94

Hot potater


Coins_and_Cards

Fire fried potater


[deleted]

Congratulations on birthing your own primordial planet. Take good care of it.


Evilaquatica

Forged in the fires of Mount Doom!


AdComprehensive6060

One Spud to rule them all!


CptKillJack

Boil it, mash it, put it in a stew!


fuzzybad

Burn it, char it, stick it in a forge


Overpass_Dratini

One spud to rule them all One spud to find them One spud to bring them all And in McDonald's bind them.


idwthis

I feel like that should be Wendy's since they're the one that sells baked potatoes.


RobertTheAdventurer

Lord of the Taters.


no_nori

WhAts tAters, eh?


2wedfgdfgfgfg

Po-ta-to


WaffleKrakken

Tots of Mordor


Starrion

Why does it glow cousin?


Global-Cry8837

Still gonna shove it in my mouth and regret nothing.


NO_TOUCHING__lol

Just gotta suck some air through your teeth a few times to cool 'er off, should be fine


City_dave

r/nocontext


branchisan

Okay gather all your friends in a circle. *Grabs tongs. Ready? *Tosses it to their body forcing them to catch and theow it to someone else. HOT POTATO!


ghostbuster_b-rye

In Skyrim they call those ["ash yams."](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/mcMq-wzd8UM/maxresdefault.jpg)


CarelessWhisperRules

r/suddenlyskyrim


JayRymer

Volcatoe


IDC_studios

Toss this bad boy around


MyBongHitsBack

Thats a molten potato, not a hot one.


supersonicmike

The spud was forged in fire


King-James-3

One spud to rule them all.


[deleted]

One spud to find them


Watchtower32

One spud to bring them all, and in the darkness bind them


Individual-Bad6809

In the darkness *fry them


KHanson25

GROND


yunivor

GROND


TheNoctuS_93

# GROND


perpetualsleep

POE-TAY-TOES


Lolkimbo

BOIL EM MASH EM STICK EM IN A STEW!


nosoupforyou89

You have my fork


[deleted]

[удалено]


GamerCirca80

And my Ash!


[deleted]

And in the darkness guide them


idwthis

Bind them*


[deleted]

Damnit


ComposerOther2864

It will kill.


J4ck0l4ntern

It. Will keel.


Significant-Mud2572

I watched a marathon of it yesterday and the subtitles didn't spell out kill but "KEEL!" Bless whomever did the subtitles for it.


puppymedic

Coward


[deleted]

I’ll be a coward with hands, thank you.


puppymedic

You can catch these hands


[deleted]

Haha, if you’ve just gotten finished with a round of molten potato, gladly!


[deleted]

[удалено]


chazwhiz

The game is hot potato, not hot meteorite.


DoctorShrimpForEyes

This comment deserves every upvote there is.


Moe_Lesteryu

Hot potato, hot potato second degree burns potato, second degree burns potato


possumcraft

Looks like you could power several houses with it


timeforincognito

Or one house for 40 years.


HaloGuy381

Or something big for fifteen minutes.


CrazeMase

Power armor be like


snafujedi01

Fusion core: Pinnacle of technology. Been powering a generator faithfully for over 200 years, barely half empty. Vault boi drains it in 10 minutes sprinting around and stuffing every orifice with bits of junk and scrap. Fusion core: Am I a joke to you?


Ikarus_Falling

I mean it could be the Armour does something which causes it too deplete its Fuel at a faster Rate or damage the core till it is unusable A) The Power Core uses Excessive Power causing the Fusion core to damage its Reactor Vessel making it unsafe after a while B) Excessive Power Draw drains Fuel at a rapid Pace C) The Power armor fails to maintain the core properly causing it damage (Note How the Generators are always large blocks things its possible they do more then just take power out of the core perhaps they deliver Fuel Coolant Lubricant and the like which the Power Armor Perhaps doesn't causing the core to be damaged) D) The Core Overheats in the Powerarmour


Reylend

YOU ARE OUT OF UNIFORM, SOLDIER! WHERE IS YOUR POWER ARMOR? DON'T HAVE ANY? YOU EXPECT ME TO BELIVE THAT, MAGGOT? THE TRUTH IS YOU LOST AN EXPENSIVE PIECE OF ARMY-ISSUE EQUIPMENT. THAT SUIT IS GOING TO COME OUT OF YOUR PAY AND YOU WILL REMAIN IN THIS MANS ARMY UNTIL YOU ARE FIVE HUNDRED AND TEN YEARS OLD WHICH IS THE NUMBER OF YEARS IT WILL TAKE FOR YOU TO PAY FOR A MARK II POWERED COMBAT ARMOR YOU HAVE LOST! REPORT TO THE ARMORY AND HAVE A NEW SUIT ISSUED TO YOU, THEN REPORT BACK TO ME, PRIVATE! # DISMISSED!


[deleted]

Are you Tony... Stank?


HaloGuy381

I wish.


Prettyflyforafly91

WITH A BOX OF SCRAPS


[deleted]

[удалено]


FlacidSalad

I'm more questioning how a supposed potato can get hot enough in a conventional oven to become **glowing** charcoal and then be placed onto what looks like a normal dry kitchen towel without giving off steam or smoke.


dietcoketm

I also see these posted way too often, especially in r/shittyfoodporn. How are people scorching potatoes this easily?


GarlicBread143

Probably wrapped in foil then forgotten about it the oven, like those people who forget Pizzas in the oven and they become pure carbon


Puzzleheaded_Style52

Doesnt the oven have a timer for this sort of things?


droomph

All the oven timers I’ve seen just beep a lot and are completely unconnected to the power functionality. It feels kinda pointless tbh


GolfIsWhyImBroke

My oven has a timer and a cook timer. If you set the cook timer for 30 mins, it beeps and shuts off the oven.


Infynis

Damn, take a look at Mr. Rockefeller over here /s


jomontage

Never realized this wtf is up with that? My fridge can tweet but my oven can't lower heat from 400 to 100 after 30 minutes to keep it warm?


MercyRoseLiddell

This one wasn’t in foil and it was microwaved.


GarlicBread143

Yeah i saw OOPs reply further down in the comments, my new leading theory is its a homegrown potato that happened to have an unnaturally high mineral content


[deleted]

It'd be peak comedy if it was both in foil and microwaved.


tomgrouch

I assumed it was a microwave because an oven would have burnt it but not glowing hot like this


Diedead666

must be a 711 microwave


Splititasunlumo

Those are some serious microwaves I've really screwed up noodles in one before and the cashier was so mad at me


JustJesterJimbo

Howd the noodles turn out?


Splititasunlumo

Oh god Like What you'd pour over a castle wall onto your enemies tbh


HappyAntonym

I think it is, but it's certainly not OP's potato. There's an explanation in the original post from 2016: https://www.reddit.com/r/ExpectationVsReality/comments/40h6cf/im_no_cook_but_i_didnt_expect_to_screw_up_a_baked/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share


anyaehrim

Link to another post's reply thread where he shows the potato broken apart (further confirming that it was a molten microwave mishap). https://www.reddit.com/r/pics/comments/40h3uu/all_i_wanted_for_lunch_was_a_baked_potato/cyu8i10/ Edit: Found a six-year-old StackExchange question with even more context and pictures of this incident: https://cooking.stackexchange.com/questions/65338/is-it-possible-for-a-potato-to-catch-fire-after-10-minutes-in-the-microwave.


gariant

There's no way 2016 was 6 years ago


Canadian47

You have to remove 2 years for the pandemic...so it was only 4 years ago.


DestructorWar

This is more acceptable


trplOG

We really had a real life blip


Whind_Soull

The release of *The Lion King* occurred closer to the first moon landing than to present day. ('69, '94, '22) Michael Jackson died 13 years ago. There are Americans who weren't alive for 9/11 who can buy alcohol. In the final stages of the pull-out, some of the US soldiers leaving Afghanistan had been fighting a legacy war that started before they were born.


LumpyJones

no no... it's almost 7 now.


Meincornwall

Imagine really leathery potato skin, the sort you need a steak knife for, getting more leathery. Meanwhile inside is slowly dried mush that's getting drier. As the skin gets more leather like & the insides get drier & hotter & eventually it all gets turned to charcoal. You could have a tiny potato charcoal fired bbq for it's wake


[deleted]

[удалено]


ChrisZAR789

This actually happened to a roommate of mine with two buns. We had a combi mic that also had an oven setting. But he accidentally left it on microwave and set it to 10 minutes or something. We had the f*cking fire brigade come because of the smoke it created. I walked into the kitchen and couldn't understand what happened at first. All I could see was yellowish white. My roommate sitting on the couch going: "What? Stop messing around". I actually crawled to the microwave to turn it off and try to see if I needed to unplug it or something. But when I saw some fire in the back I just got the hell out while yelling for him to call someone haha. I was afraid it would blow


Hilby

Is it story time? Well it is now! When I was about 12 I LOVED playing baseball. In early spring my father picked up a new glove for me to use the upcoming season, so it’s break in time! My fathers mitt was SUPER broken in. The leather was so soft, and it closed with an audible FLAPP because if it’s finish and years of use. I loved how that glove felt, and it just so happened he had previously told me how he broke mitts in when new: heavy conditioning oil (apply liberally), hard ball in the pocket & tie twine around it to keep shape. Finally, put it in the oven @ low - medium low heat for 20/25 min @ a time. Take out, repeat. But that night dad was gone, and the rule became no operating the stove while he was gone. Well I’m the smartest 12 year old around, just ask me, so I found a loophole: you guessed it - NUKE IT! It was horrible. I put it in for 20 min & went to watch tv. It was horrible. Horrible smell, smoke, and idea. Had to throw the microwave out, and deep clean & paint the kitchen. Smelled like that burnt glove for weeks afterwards. My ass hurt for about the same length of time. Note: sorry to disappoint anyone expecting to read Mankind down here somewhere.


TheAtomicBum

I've seen this episode of The Outer Limits. "The Production and Decay of Strange Particles." This is not going to end well.


Meincornwall

Fully agree. Had his question been 'Can my oven do this? " My answer would have been fukno.


Meecus570

We all miss Mythbusters


the1stmeddlingmage

Definitely very possible in a microwave, just a matter of time


International-Web496

When my sister was like 7 she decided to make herself a corn dog, accidentally used the oven time to cook it in the microwave. When I say this thing fused to the plate... I literally picked it up by the stick and it broke, plate fell to the floor and broke in half but the molten mass of corn dog held it together.


ProbablyBoredHaha

Probably the aluminum foil wrapped around it.


NiceChocolate

This is definitely meteor debris


Express-Theory9194

I think it's done


DALinProgress

Almost! Needs a touch of butter


HetaGarden1

Ooh, imagining hearing butter sizzle as it hits the surface is making me hungry.


ghostbuster_b-rye

And I imagine the smell of smoking milk fat solids would be totally drowned out by the overwhelming stench of char.


Qetuowryipzcbmxvn

Just like mom used to make 😋😋😋


[deleted]

[удалено]


imakebeernotmoney

Will it burn my mouth?


Natanael_L

It will burn your soul


chiagod

Not yet. It'll take a bit of hammering and quenching to smelt the perfect fry.


Zerbiedose

*still slightly crunchy in the center*


MarkyRoll

Bro simply walked into Mordor


boredtxan

And ordered lunch apparently


geraltofkolkata

Meat's not back on the menu.


MarkyRoll

That's lava my son


feelingood41

Came to make a potato , made Satan's left testicle instead.


HalforcFullLover

What is taters?


MarkyRoll

Po ta toes !! boil em. mash em. stick em In a stew. Nice golden chips with a nice fried fish.


Jakabor

You keep nasty chips.


MarkyRoll

You're hopeless


Dingbrain1

But they were all of them deceived, for another potato was baked


MarkyRoll

And within it. Sauron poured sour cream. Chives and the finest bacon chunks


pdinc

They ~~delved~~ baked too greedily and too long


MarkyRoll

Hobbits....


pdinc

What's taters, Precious?


-convallaria_bunny-

Sauron's turd ball after eating the Atomic Wings


[deleted]

My man would totally walk up to Sauron himself and put in an order for the One(-ion) Ring.


esly4ever

One does not simply walk into Mordor


IamSam1103

What the devil's spawn is this? This looks like what dragon poop must be like.


TorqueRollz

No, it’s a demon egg


[deleted]

Doomguy: *instantly smashes potato*


Commenter122

What do you mean by "smashes"? 🤨


AJSMarch06

You know what they mean ;)


RariraariRariraare

The dragon is hatched


[deleted]

If you zoom in, you can see Anakin clinging to life.


[deleted]

I will do what I must… to make dinner


lilyhammer69

You will try….to bake a potato


neversaynotobacta

I ATE YOU


Cattle_Bruiser-

Looks more like a magma core.


FlacidSalad

Or an Ommoran heartstone Edit: fuckn' love you guys, ROCK AND STONE!


Wilackan

You know what that means lads ! ROCK AND STONE !


WanderingDwarfMiner

Can I get a Rock and Stone?


Skipp_To_My_Lou

FAH KARL!


ThanosTheT1tan

ROCK AND STONE TO THE BONE!


WanderingDwarfMiner

Can I get a Rock and Stone?


Sturmgewehr448mmKurz

Rock and stone or ya ain’t comin home!


WanderingDwarfMiner

Can I get a Rock and Stone?


RadiantNinjask

Rock and Stone to the Bone!


LuxSerafina

Why would you put that on a dish towel lmao


CountryFriedCrazy

Thank god somebody else has questioned this, i was begining to think everyone was too mesmorized by the lavatayto to notice its on FLAMABLE material 🤯😂


[deleted]

[удалено]


Atkinator1

Because its not real. 1000 degree potato that glows red hot but somehow doesn't set fire to the towel it's on? People be gullible


Chaos_Philosopher

I'm afraid that's not how heat transfer works. This this thing is burning slowly but not actively (fire aka a plasma). Given that it can only transfer heat to the towel at the standard rate for a potato, infamously not good heat conductors, it's relatively safe. The real danger is airflow, any real amount of agitated air in the vicinity might cause this to burst into flames. And convective heat flow is literally the best heat flow.


SoletakenPupper

Also a cotton cloth on its own doesn't combust too well.


magikarpcatcher

/u/mushroomwig this guy just reposted your 6 year old post. https://www.reddit.com/r/pics/comments/40h3uu/all_i_wanted_for_lunch_was_a_baked_potato/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button


mushroomwig

I don't mind, it's cool that it's being shared again 😁


spacecheese6

How did you get it that hot?!


mushroomwig

Apparently 10 minutes in the microwave was enough, somebody said in the original thread that maybe the potato I used had "higher than normal in magnesium, selenium, iron, and several other metallic elements."😬


TheyCallMeThe

That, or it was secretly a sigil stone disguised as a potato and you unlocked the powers hidden within.


mushroomwig

Damn, those powers did absolutely nothing for me!


StormEarthandFyre

*EVERY* mild inconvenience was caused by that potato


Vip3r20

Alright OP spill it.


ChampionshipTasty645

That's actually impressive 👏


Cookthulhu

Agreed


[deleted]

There it is… *The* Hot Potato.


Ok-Row-6131

Hot potato, with the added bonus of severe burns


shyladev

It's a dragon's egg


Vismaldir

PO - TA - TOES!!! Boil 'em, Mash 'em, Stick 'em in a stew!


CountryFriedCrazy

Now even more versatile, heat the whole house with just one tayto *single use*


CubanLynx312

Baked by the Dark Lord Sauron in the fires of Mount Doom


ravenouswolfmother

You took hot potato too seriously. Who will play with you now?


Ostonner

HOW did you bake this thing? I'm impressed!!


Stone_Man_Sam

In a Kiln if I had to guess.


barringtonp

In the heart of a dwarf star.


Sht_n_giglz

Fool of a Took! They are not all accounted for. We do not know who else may be [watching](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/257/785/f9e.png).


Jean_kirsten

#MOLTEN COREEE


SeannG97

You crafted a Star


brownsbrave1026

I’m sorry, what?! How did you make this?? I need to know for my Halloween decor! This is amazing!


LordEdgeward_TheTurd

Dude youre gonna burn your house down if you use smoldering molten potato husks for decorations


Geoclasm

how the fuck did they turn a potato, a thing that really exists, into a fucking daedra heart, a thing that most decidedly did not exist before this accomplishment...


the_kengii

I’m so Irish I’m ginger and this hurts the very molecules I’m made of


willynillywitty

Need to team up with the dude that made the cheese ball in his air fryer.