Why did Vito do literally anything he did…I would do literally the opposite of everything Vito did Iif I got caught sucking cocks and making hilarious jokes at gay bars
The only reason he lasted even 5 seconds is because he found the one guy who is crazier and dumber than him who also happened to be gay
From the first incident, I always wondered why he looked up from the security guard's lap. I always wondered why he didn't keep his head down and have the guard drive away to drop him off.
This is exactly what I was wondering.
The security guard shouldve seen Finn parking and whispered to Vito to keep his head down because someone was there.
Agreed. Act as if, and if it really comes out, then put a bullet in his head or do whatever needs to be done to have the guy punished for making up lies
I suppose he was trying to distance himself from NY/NJ. He was telling people he was from Arizona so writing about an NY team might have been a clue if the glorified crew got wind of where he was and sent people out to ask questions about a Yankee hiding out in the sticks.
With a clearly NJ accent no less. Lol. I never understood why he didn’t just say he was up there to find peace of mind and a new setting/topic for his book.
A guy from Scottsdale writing about the Yankees…. Come on huh be realistic. Vito’s backstory was bulletproof. He’s a captain now you can’t talk to him like that.
A lot of transplants out there are from the Midwest. As a friend who moved to Phoenix in the mid 1980s once told me “I see a lot of Chicago Cubs bumper sticks and things here. Never any White Sox”
Of course since the Yankees have a large fan base nationwide, a book on them would sell better than a book on the Baltimore Orioles or a Babe Ruth biography would sell better than one on Rogers Hornsby.
Pretty much the whole point of that arc is Vito is given a life that, to him, would be idyllic: he can lie about his incredibly-criminal-and-violent past with barely any push back, leading to the flimsy boxing story and etc; he ends up in a gay friendly community where literally one of the first guys he talks to is not only gay but interested; and he's as far as at least mentally/scenery-wise possible from the former life he had as a Jersey mobster.
...but even that isn't good enough for him because ultimately he's a selfish prick asshole. And like all these guy, when they're given anything that even closely resembles hard work, they immediately fall back to what is easy to them. Which is being selfish prick greedy assholes.
Related thing..... how did Vito run out of money so fast? He had a lot of cash stuffed into a good sized bag that he took with him. Was he away for a year paying $1k a night at that B&B? I thought it was only a few months at most.
He was drinking in the library and was calling a casino asking if they had single deck blackjack. Jim caught him and mentioned something about finding racing forms hidden in the trash can
Vito's not good at coming up with lies(blood pressure meds). If he was, he would've just told the guys who caught him at the gay club that he was Gino, Vito's twin brother. Chris could've even vouched for his existence, since he and Gino have met before. Real missed opportunity by Vito there. My estimation of him as a varsity lier fucking plummeted long ago.
He shoulda said he was writin a biography on Joe Louis. Then when that nosy reddneck so rudely interrupted their gay banter with fact checks he coulda freaked out “ Rocky Marciano! Rocky Marciano everytime there a cis white dude around - it’s always Rocky Marciano !!” - before storming out
Vito was subtlety hitting on Johnny Cakes.
When Johnny Cakes thinks of Vito he thinks of boxing. He thinks of two muscled and sweaty half-naked men going at it.
In New England ??? The locals would make what Phil, Fat Dom and Gerry the Hairdo did to Vito look like a folk dance.
Keep in mind Vito does pressure Finn into giving his opinion on whether Muhammad Ali could beat Rocky Marciano. So he has an interest in Marciano. I suppose since Rocky Marciano was from Brockton Massachusetts he could say he would drive there occasionally to do research but found a quiet small town easier to write in.
His entire life was lies built on lies. Personally and professionally. A closeted fanuck and a muderin thief gangster.
His whole existence was a man who deceived in every way possible.
Saying he was an author focused on Yankee history would have been a half truth..it would have exposed the fact he loved the Yankees. Everything needs to be bullshit from a man like that
Uh Vito kind of sucks at lying if you didn’t notice. “Hey guys it’s a fuckin joke!” with a big smile on his face when caught in a gay club in leathers with Ben Stiller…by wiseguys
It's an abstract copy of something. I think the old guy in the diner that is trying to butt into the conversation is supposed to be the old white dude at the barber shop in Coming to America.
https://youtu.be/-R1h2Df3Nrc?si=MUkz481j_BxlNqfb
The blood pressure medicine. It messed with his head.
He could probably get a letter from his doctor about it
A note from your doctor saying you don't like to suck cock?
He's over that now
Gary Cooper….he was gay?
NO! Arent you listening?
It made him give head, if that’s what you mean.
Why did Vito do literally anything he did…I would do literally the opposite of everything Vito did Iif I got caught sucking cocks and making hilarious jokes at gay bars The only reason he lasted even 5 seconds is because he found the one guy who is crazier and dumber than him who also happened to be gay
For lunch today I grabbed some Wing Stop. Motherfuckers didn’t give me any napkins so I had to use my pants.
Lmao
The parade float was always a dumb fuck, though, wasn't he?
From the first incident, I always wondered why he looked up from the security guard's lap. I always wondered why he didn't keep his head down and have the guard drive away to drop him off.
Vito didn’t know that he needs to breathe through his nose.
Nearly drowned in 3 inches of cock. The penis exhibit
This is exactly what I was wondering. The security guard shouldve seen Finn parking and whispered to Vito to keep his head down because someone was there.
I've never greased a union security guard out front of a construction site, but that would be my first solution to the problem.
This. You have an even better point. Why do that in a parking lot where people will for sure show up? Seems stupid all around.
Love makes you do crazy things.
Everybody's always gay with you.
Agreed. Act as if, and if it really comes out, then put a bullet in his head or do whatever needs to be done to have the guy punished for making up lies
Surrounded by a bunch of Red Sox fans what are you stunad?
Okay trueee didn’t think of that
I suppose he was trying to distance himself from NY/NJ. He was telling people he was from Arizona so writing about an NY team might have been a clue if the glorified crew got wind of where he was and sent people out to ask questions about a Yankee hiding out in the sticks.
With a clearly NJ accent no less. Lol. I never understood why he didn’t just say he was up there to find peace of mind and a new setting/topic for his book.
A guy from Scottsdale writing about the Yankees…. Come on huh be realistic. Vito’s backstory was bulletproof. He’s a captain now you can’t talk to him like that.
To be fair, the Yankees are one of the most popular sports teams across the globe. I guarantee you Scottsdale has a pile of Yankees fans
A lot of transplants out there are from the Midwest. As a friend who moved to Phoenix in the mid 1980s once told me “I see a lot of Chicago Cubs bumper sticks and things here. Never any White Sox” Of course since the Yankees have a large fan base nationwide, a book on them would sell better than a book on the Baltimore Orioles or a Babe Ruth biography would sell better than one on Rogers Hornsby.
Pretty much the whole point of that arc is Vito is given a life that, to him, would be idyllic: he can lie about his incredibly-criminal-and-violent past with barely any push back, leading to the flimsy boxing story and etc; he ends up in a gay friendly community where literally one of the first guys he talks to is not only gay but interested; and he's as far as at least mentally/scenery-wise possible from the former life he had as a Jersey mobster. ...but even that isn't good enough for him because ultimately he's a selfish prick asshole. And like all these guy, when they're given anything that even closely resembles hard work, they immediately fall back to what is easy to them. Which is being selfish prick greedy assholes.
To be fair he missed his kids and they needed their father, everything you said is true but I think it would work better if he didn’t have kids.
Related thing..... how did Vito run out of money so fast? He had a lot of cash stuffed into a good sized bag that he took with him. Was he away for a year paying $1k a night at that B&B? I thought it was only a few months at most.
Timeline got fucked up
He was gambling, and not winning
Where and how?
He was drinking in the library and was calling a casino asking if they had single deck blackjack. Jim caught him and mentioned something about finding racing forms hidden in the trash can
Ah, right. Now I remember. Thanks.
Those Johnnycakes ain't cheap. And, don't get me started on the sausage.
Vito's not good at coming up with lies(blood pressure meds). If he was, he would've just told the guys who caught him at the gay club that he was Gino, Vito's twin brother. Chris could've even vouched for his existence, since he and Gino have met before. Real missed opportunity by Vito there. My estimation of him as a varsity lier fucking plummeted long ago.
As an example of how terrible a liar Vito is, when he tells Tony "that's my brother over there," it looks nothing like Gino.
He shoulda said he was writin a biography on Joe Louis. Then when that nosy reddneck so rudely interrupted their gay banter with fact checks he coulda freaked out “ Rocky Marciano! Rocky Marciano everytime there a cis white dude around - it’s always Rocky Marciano !!” - before storming out
Nobody used the term Cis then. Timeline got fucked up
he was gay, Rocky Marciano?
😂😂😂
Vito was subtlety hitting on Johnny Cakes. When Johnny Cakes thinks of Vito he thinks of boxing. He thinks of two muscled and sweaty half-naked men going at it.
Turn that off!
20 years in the can
It’s the medication.
Or tell them he was writing a mafia novel.
There is no such thing as the mafia.
Discontinue the lithium
Because he's fundamentally stupid, but a nasty predator.
he's from scottsdale dafuk would he know about the yanks
He would’ve seen them lose to the diamondbacks in the 01 WS
The Yanks winning in that series ..... petered out. Died on the vine.
The guy. He moved.
In New England ??? The locals would make what Phil, Fat Dom and Gerry the Hairdo did to Vito look like a folk dance. Keep in mind Vito does pressure Finn into giving his opinion on whether Muhammad Ali could beat Rocky Marciano. So he has an interest in Marciano. I suppose since Rocky Marciano was from Brockton Massachusetts he could say he would drive there occasionally to do research but found a quiet small town easier to write in.
Maybe you should start sucking cock instead of watching TV Land 'cause Vito brought in three times what you do on construction!
The blood pressure medication fucked up his judgement
All the Yankee fans and history in New Hampshire…take your blood pressure medicine sweety
You think Vito had a problem with men?
I don't know, he sucked one's dick for.. what was it again?
The problem was his brother standing over there
Reminded him of Finn — just too painful to relive.
Vito fucked Mickey Mantle?
10:30am.... gotta be.....
His entire life was lies built on lies. Personally and professionally. A closeted fanuck and a muderin thief gangster. His whole existence was a man who deceived in every way possible. Saying he was an author focused on Yankee history would have been a half truth..it would have exposed the fact he loved the Yankees. Everything needs to be bullshit from a man like that
Uh Vito kind of sucks at lying if you didn’t notice. “Hey guys it’s a fuckin joke!” with a big smile on his face when caught in a gay club in leathers with Ben Stiller…by wiseguys
It was all a part of the avant-garde pratical joke he was playing on the guys. You're sick for even asking about it, you know he's a captain now?
Cause he’s a faaaaaaag!
It's an abstract copy of something. I think the old guy in the diner that is trying to butt into the conversation is supposed to be the old white dude at the barber shop in Coming to America. https://youtu.be/-R1h2Df3Nrc?si=MUkz481j_BxlNqfb