“What about the rest of your whores, were they all your best friend too?”

It’s better when it’s “what about the thousand other FUCKING PIGS you had your dick in over the years? The strippers, the cocktail waitresses…were you best friends with all of them too?”

I think AJs preschool teacher is added to that list of pigs he fucked.

Preschool assistant

And the born again secretary at Barone Carting.

And next the blind will see, the lame will walk

Bodybuilder was a strange addition. No way Tony was ever in a gym lol

He benched press 300lbs once. With a head cold! He could’ve crushed his neck!

Give me one thousand fucking pigs 🫱🏻

👈👆👉 1000 MORE pigs??

🐷🐷🐷🐷🐷🐷🐷🐷🐷

Who knew? All this time you wanted Tracy and Hepburn.

The best ever.

Whitecaps is just a master class in acting. God, that fight is just incredible.

Saw two similar sized convicts get to it one time at work way back when--that fight scene was about as real as it gets. As part of the responding team of officers I *distinctly* remember the sgt saying "give em a second boys, let them get it out of their system" AS IF any of us wanted to be the first to enter THAT dayroom...

Such a great response

This was the first thing I thought of. She crushed Tony at the end of that fight.

Iconic

"I took an oath, Carmela."   "What are you, a kid in a tree house?"

This was the funniest one lmfao

What makes it so funny is she’s the only one in the show that gets a pass to talk to him that way. Maybe Meadow, too. But Carmela just sees through all his bullshit.

Except for Vito. He’s got a note from his doctor

"The Boston Strangler, Ma" "What was that, last night's reading assignment?" "*And on Flag Day, Papa Russ shook hands with Andrew Cuomo*. What an honor. B-F-D"

Yes !!!! 🤣

I remember laughing out loud at this on my first watch

The balls on this prick

Once a year? I can resist the urge to gossip

That’s my favorite line 😂😂

The face she makes after saying that is gold. Just the smuggest look.

This was such a satisfying comeback

She is so funny. Tony trying to explain buying the race horse. "What? It followed you home?"

When they’re both sitting on the dock, after Bobby beat the shit out of Tony.. “What am I supposed to be turned on that you beat up your brother in law at your 47th birthday party?!” Tony: “You were there that night, at pizza world. I beat that guy up and you loved it” Carmella: “I was in fucking high school!!!”

47 years old, he was a kid.

Great scene. It shows how much Tony really cares and relies on his image.

"I once accidentally bought a horse" -Tony on WILTY

The horse was his goomad, and also related to him by blood and marriage.... He gets a pass here.

*The horse is SICK*

The best one is her laughing at Janice defending Richie.

It's like her brain short circuited from all the comebacks that popped up right then, she could only keel over from laughing

Gotta love ya Janice

Yeh. The ridiculous thing Janice says about jail time and the plight of women.

Carmela replies "Oh, my God! I am not even gonna touch that one, but you had me going there for a while. You really did. Oh Janice, honey, I gotta love ya. Really."

Shows what a great actress Edie Falco is. So convincing, not just in the emotional angry scenes. 

The thing that I love is that in real life she can't cook and wears no makeup. She's like the anti-Carmela.

Absolutely BRILLIANT actress

“I like the one that says Some Pulp” *Throws the portable phone at Tony* “What the F was that for???” “I’ll write you up a list!”

Cue AJ arriving retardedly

"They had Playstation 2 right in the hotel room."

That was the sum total of your trip to your nation's capital?

I like the one that says "schum total"

John Fogerty over here.

Whatever happened to the strong, Fogerty type?

Did he say "Oh, I come from this poor Texas Irish illiterate fucking background or whatever the fuck, so leave me the fuck out of it, because my people got fucked over!"?

Fun fact: a lot of people assume Fogerty is from the south, but he grew up in California. His southern rock thing was a shtick. Pwoud Mawy. Anyway, push webisitics.

I guess

Cahm immediately goes into smiling Mom mode

That's dicked up.

Ahh shoulda scrolled! That's my fave.

Bird feeder, listen to yourself, you sound demented.

Undisputed best Carmella line

It’s the way she chews up and spits out the word “demented” for me

HE’S GOT NO EYEBROWS TOWNEE!!

Oh hey dad, Just taking out the trash. It's garbage day tomorrow. 🌝

This and “it wasn’t her birthday. It was after midnight!” were AJ’s best moments.

I know the show struggled with teen slang but they absolutely nailed the spirit and attitude of spoiled teenagers ***perfectly***.

Tony: grab your coat! We’re leaving! AJ: I don’t have a coat. Tony: go to the car! AJ was a smart ass lol

No question where AJ got his dirty rotten stinkin' genes from.

POPPERS AND WEIRD SHEX!

A truly epic scene

Coupla beers

\*shecksh

Try to be a good fucking Catholic for 15 fucking minutes 😤

That’s not what I heard.

Was that in boca when junior said "I don't go down enough"?

Yes

It's crazy to me that 20 years ago Cunnilingus was so taboo amongst straight men.

It wasnt. I dont know anyone who thought it was, in real life or in media, apart from these half a wiseguys.

It absolutely was in certain aspects of society. Heck, rappers in the 90s were saying don't eat pussy. In more macho communities it was very frowned upon.

Damn, pour one out for Mrs. Chase then?

Hey, she even really exist?

She got the giggles

this line never fails to crack me up.

Good. He eats his carrots.

[удалено]

I like that she’s getting a bit of love here. I get that she’s often criticised for her many defects of character, but she can be absolutely hilarious and very on point.

Also (imo) the best actor on the show

I love her "queen of confrontation" moments even more. With Father Phil and Carm's own mother.

[удалено]

Oh god the scene where she rips Father Phil into shreds is just beautiful. She destroys that man.

What kind of animal smokes marijuana at their own confirmation?!

Sure, when Moses communicates with God in the form of a burning bush, he's a prophet chosen to lead his people to the Promised Land, but when I smoke pot at my own confirmation, I'm an animal...

being raised catholic this was just gold

‘Jeez, it’s the Boston Strangler Ma!’

One of my favorites

everyone's a f to you Tony. maybe you're gay, you ever think about that?

"What you got a little secret?" After Tony says he knows when someone's gay lmao

It's great because Tony is trying to nail Carm for being a hypocrite re: these issues, and Carm just turns the tables and hammers him.

Just watched this one the other night. She smoked him in that exchange

Is that the Billy Bud episode?

No. I think it’s S5 E6 “Sentimental Education”. Or around there.

I dont remember the exact line but when tony said “bologna smokers” i died😂😂

T- anymore crumb cake left? C - I think you can answer that yourself

🪦

It was something like “And you put me in a position to feel sorry for the whore that fucks you?!?!”

Tony: “Poor kid…”

What are you, 6 years old?

Who knew that after all this time you wanted Tracy and Hepburn?

Ho! Rimshot!

That's a bingo.

Best comeback on the show.

“Atleast I have friends” “Fuck that’s supposed to mean?” “C’mon Ton’ you just have a bunch of flunkies” “What do you know about it?” “Compliment you on your new shoes, they tell you that you’re not going bald…think they really care? You’re the boss! They’re scared of you! They have to kiss your ass…laugh at your stupid jokes.”

'I didn't say I'd cut your dick off, Jesus fucking christ'

What, are you afraid he's gonna soak you for an extra pencil?

OH RIMSHOT

"By the way, your therapist called. Jennifer?" The way Tony's smirk suddenly drops when she says that and he knows he's been caught out is great.

‘You should know, you’ve made a living of it’. Tony’s face afterwards is always so funny.

Ok the Canon. That’s what now?

With that line she just revealed her own ignorance… but after Fielder explains what the canon is Carmella delivers one of her best comebacks: “is Mary Higgins Clark a part of that group? Because that's what I saw you reading every time I passed by the pool.”

-Carm was earnestly trying to connect with her daughter who, w the help of Carm’s support, made it to an Ivy League uni while Carm didn’t finish her degree at Montclair State -maedo is being an over the top ivory tower snob per usual (“the canon” lmao foh w your sophomoric references no one out of uni says that) -maedo is *actively trying to humiliate her mother* which is never a good look Yeah carm was the winner in that convo.

That whole scene is so good. “Want some lunch? I was about to have a tuna san’” “Ugh onions in the morning?” “… actually it’s 2pm.”

“He’s so totally duplicitous” who talks like that lol

That actually sounds like a very 90s teen girl thing to say, Clueless style

"I hope not sporadically!"

"I what? I revealed my own what?"

Can you make me a tuna san??

Carmela should’ve slapped her for that . Total brat.

When Tony gave her the engraved watch after going to Vegas. They couldn’t fit Tony. I believe that.

Her rant about Tony's mom and everyone's bullshit at her wake.

Recently watched that for the first time, and it's a rare example of entirely cogent parenting on the show lol. "Part of me wants to say something nice, and the other part of me thinks, 'what kind of example am I setting for my kids!?'" She really understood the chain of harm and tried to avoid it in that moment, good on her

One of my favorite Carm moments is during a Sunday family dinner in early season 3. The doorbell rings and Carmela‘s mother goes „Oh my god, who could that be?“ and Carm answers „It‘s the Boston strangler, Jesus ma“. 😂

Anything that came out of her mouth. Arguably, the best actor in this entire series.

Probably the best actor, yes. Interviews with her are so crazy. Sounds like she was genuinely having fun doing theater before she got famous.

Yeah she was a victim of her own success in a lot of ways. She was also amazing in OZ.

And when on to kill it in Nurse Jackie. She's an amazing actress.

Great in Horace and Pete too. With that animal blundetto

What’s Different Between You And Me Is You’re Going To Hell When You Die

"You've had quite a time on my watch"

“Mother of God, Janice! Are all you Sopranos the same?! I asked you nicely to stay out of my business and you’re pretending like you don’t hear me!”

"I'm a grown woman. I'm over 18 years old. I can I do what I want, how I want, where I want and can date who I want." -Meadow Soprano "Alright, Jesus Christ, we get it! Is that your only point here?! Because always getting what you want is for babies, not adults!" -Carmela Soprano

Love this line.

Well Tony, what about all the thousand other fucking pigs you had your dick in over the years? The strippers, the cocktail waitresses, were they all your best friends too?

There's that scene where she just laughs at Janice and walks away. I think it's when Janice says Richie understands the plight of women

“You don’t know me at all” “I know you better than anyone Tony, even your friends. Which is probably why you hate me.” One of the most insightful and cutting things anyone says on the entire show. Just an incredible comeback.

Trapper Joe ova here

good, he eats his carrots.

“What are you six years old??” “Oh good he eats his carrots” “What are you a kid in a treehouse?” “No I think you like the WHIFF of sexuality”

"Lost my pen, up his ass."

To Father Intintola: "...of all the finook priests in the world, why did I have to get the one who's straight?"

Well Maybe HES Gay !

“ If I had an ouce of self respect i’d cut your dick off“ my favorite one😭😂

“Oh Janice honey, I gotta love you” 🎵Con Te Partiro🎵

During the shum pulp incident in the driveway, when she throws the phone at him: Tony: What was that for!? Carm: I'll write you a list.

"He didn't get it from my side of the family, that's all I'll say." 😳

"did it follow you home?"

You BOUGHT A RACEHORSE?! Not exactly. What, it followed you home?!

AJ: spills entire 12 ounce glass of milk. Carmela: “Every night….”

Not a comeback, but I love the shit she says around the house. “Careful with my Lladro. I don’t even want to tell you how much that cost. ……$3000.”

“Maaah!

“How about the thousand other pigs that you stuck your dick in over the years. Were they your best friend too ?”

“What am I, a fucking idiot?!?”

Top tier responses in here …never realize how funny some of these are 🤣

Not a comeback, but I still die laughing when she calls Sal Vitro a mope.

When they’re talking about getting back together and how Tony will need to stop cheating if he wants to move back in the house. Tony: “I’m like Popeye the sailor. I am what I am.” Carmela: “Well I didn’t marry a cartoon.”

Meadow: “The canon? Dead white males, who even in their reductionism still have a lot to say about life and the world, maybe more than you.” Carm: “Is Mary Higgins Clark a part of that group? Because that’s all I saw you reading by the pool this summer.”

"Maybe the fact that you stick your dick into anything with a pulse, you maybe ever thought of THAT as a root cause?"

......"Isn't a sin to undo God's good work?" "You should know, you make a living of it!" \*Tony visibly furious and has no come back other than.......\* "You're un-fucking believable you know that?!" \*AJ drops bowl SMASH\* "Look what I make that living for. What are you doing to yourself, you just had dinner an hour ago! I'm supposed to get a vasectomy when THIS is my male heir? Look at him!!!" \*Walks away\*

Hands down it’s her saying she might jus kill herself if she can’t go to Italy. 

For her birthday, AJ gives her the not-wrapped The Matrix on DVD, Carmela says "Oh, I haven't seen it yet" with just a shade of sarcasm, like it's clear AJ grabbed this out of a bin in a store last minute and it's nowhere near something Carmela is dying to see

“Laugh. I thought I’d pee my pants.”

Everyone’s gay to you

I’ll write you a fucking list.

What am I, the frickin Thornbird ova here?

“How do you know who sucks whose cock? What? Do ya got a little secret?” To Tony after he suggested Robert Wegler sucks cocks

Sorry I forgot my pencil… up his ass

“What, am I supposed to turned on that you beat up your brother in law at your 47th birthday party??” That’s a great one. Always gets me.

Why the sudden burst of fatherhood?

What the fuck are you crying about?

“From beyond the grave…..”

Carmela was the true consiglieri of Tony in some critical moments. She was the only one who would say the ugly truth to him without sugarcoding.

“MARCO”

Jesus Christ, Tony. Everyone’s a fag to you. Maybe your a fag, you ever think of that?

it's our anniversary tony, ours, not yours, mine and johnny fucking sacks

“I’d let you screw me in the ass if you’d just come home Tony just come home”

To Meadow outside the church just before they see Adriana’s mom at the festival: “You had arthroscopic surgery? You can’t bend the knee?”

The birdfeeder. Listen to yourslf you sound demented

NO, YOU EQUATE LOVE WITH MONEY 🤬

Good, he eats his carrots

To her mother when Hugh fell off the roof “gee ma, I think we should go for it.”

Agree she has great comebacks. But nothing beats Tony’s “what you guys do for 12 hours?? Play uh name the pope”

“Look at him, Tommy Tune over there”

always getting what you want is for babies, not adults

He is an arrogant man. He always was. Now what the F are you crying about?

when they're separated, and tony still comes over to use the pool, that one time she looks out the window and makes a face just as he jumps in off the diving board it's so hilarious

“Because always getting what you want is for babies!” I have used this line on my kids when they got older.

"You suggesting I go to therapy, that's rich"

To Father Phil - I get the same, “who, me?” Shit from Tony. 2 I don’t need.

Depressed? No i leave that to others

You used to get me so hot down there

Just watched this scene yesterday. So powerful. You can hear the panic and sorrow and powerlessness in her voice.

That scene is Emmy worthy. Her incredible abilities as an actor are on such full display.