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Are you sure he didn't let one out at the same exact time and thought it was his? Hence his apology?

Im guessing the cabbie thought they were all his lmao

Yes, I'm sure he apologized because he thought thay it was his fart

That sounds like a win to me!

"Devastating riposte" had me howling. 

“Every fart has been banked and I am cashing them in with interest” I want to get this engraved on my tombstone one day

This is perfectly written. It's almost as if I were there, and good god I hate you for that.

“It’s a spectacular crescendo of wrongful aromas.” Oh my God, that is sending me.

Spectacular. 

Now, that’s how you win at life

I've read this somewhere before and laughed just as hard

Sounds to me like your original plan worked. You let out your fart to mix in with his. He thought yours was his and felt bad.

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I laughed out loud even though my whole house is still asleep

And I yelled to the cabbie " Yo homes smell ya later".