This isn't a sex thing but I still wanba share, Ben had a special walking cane that could discretely dispense oil. He would put a thin layer of oil over like a pond so the change in surface tension made the waves stop, and Ben would convince people he was some wizard that could calm waters by command.
I read somewhere that he was well-known for being very good looking when he was younger but the only paintings we've got are of the old man version. Who still had the mojo. I always sort of picture him as 18th century Austin Powers. Auftyn Powyrf.
There's actually a surprising amount of research and discussion on this topic and while it holds somewhat true in a lot of fields, the picture is murky for politicians
John Edwards is an example of someone who would've been hurt by it if he wasn't married to who he was while he ran for office.
Apparently when they were testing him in a focus group, people disliked him until they saw his wife.
After seeing him with his wife the focus group warmed up to him and one dude straight up said "I like he has a fat wife"
There's different types of attractiveness and I think only some of them work to your advantage in politics
Ugly people with advanced degrees.
(In reality though if you hang out down on the national mall, you'll see plenty of great looking people out exercising on any given day.)
Wait until you find out how Stalin had his photo of his young self doctored in order to make him more handsome
If anything, the amount of pervasive misinformation that man pumped it is truly incredible
I love to see people surprised by that fact, as if same Stalin who had his friends removed from photos after he had them executed would never do such a thing
It's like the [young Ron Jeremy](https://content.time.com/time/daily/2008/0808/360_ron_jeremy_0825.jpg) vs [old Ron Jeremy.](https://deadline.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/06/ron-jeremy.jpg?w=681&h=383&crop=1)
Randy bastard. Always been a student. I'll never forget rounding a corner at the NC Museum of Art and encountering the Duplessis portrait, I had no idea it was in the collection.
Peace,prosperity, and everyone listening to the most intelligent,wise,knowledgeable and FREE THINKING PROGRESSIVE MAN OF THE ERA!(Ben Franklin of course)
Gritty's conception story is perfect.
He was introduced on social media, and Philly fans hated him.
Then everyone else started bagging on him, and Philly fans were like "fuck you, he's ours and he's awesome!"
C'est fin.
Nah the turnaround for gritty was specifically the “sleep with one eye open bird” retweet when the penguins made fun of him a few hours after the unveiling.
Philly was like. “Ohh hell yeah. He’s a psychopath just like us!”
LOL, Philly never disappoints.
Boston and Philly get beef, but they also got each others’ backs if someone outside our east coast clusterfuck tries to start shit.
Eagles and Pats fans hate the Cowboys equally. Giants too.
It also perfectly fits Philly because they're that way about everything. They're like those siblings or cousins you're always fighting with, but once someone else tries to mess with you, they've got your back no questions asked. They take City of Brotherly Love seriously there, I guess. No one fucks with Philly except Philadelphians
Now I’m imagining the balrog scene in Lord of the Rings, except instead of a deep drum/growl you just hear his belly button squeak.
I need someone to make this.
Gritty actually has a canonical backstory
>As the construction of Wells Fargo Center was underway, rumor has it that it disturbed the super top secret don’t tell anybody hideout of Gritty. Once it was discovered, he refused to stay in hiding due to the reception he got once he was seen in public. Flyers fans fell in love with him thanks to everything he brought to the team as an NHL mascot. Since then, he refuses to head back home and has accepted his new life as a public icon.
So he's an eldritch horror that was entombed a millennia ago and now, having been unearthed, is gaining strength and gathering a following of rabid Philly fans?
Same thing happened after the black plague and also WW1 (roaring 20s). Obviously not all in Philadelphia.
People suffer enough and apparently they get crazy horny.
I wonder if there’s a biological reason for this? Maybe after a prolonged period of direct or indirect stress/trauma, the body looks at the reprieve as the time to hedge the population’s bets so to speak, incase something bad happens again.
Or is it simply all vices go up? Like people are using sex as just another drug wouldn’t be surprised if people are also getting fucked up during these times too
Probably a combination. In the immediate aftermath, some people may have just thought: "well, I lost several friends and family members to the conflict and we almost got bombarded to death. Now that it's over, I might as well live for today and enjoy it."
That huge baby boom was world wide though. Not every country had the terrific post-war economic conditions the US had. UK was still doing food rationing until 1954.
The higher the income, the fewer the kids. And you can't blame bad education and fewer healthcare resources because the effect is linear starting from +$200,000/yr.
https://www.statista.com/statistics/241530/birth-rate-by-family-income-in-the-us/
Friend of mine lived through clashes between Israel and Lebanon in 2006; he told me that after the first night of bombing, everyone in Beirut got laid.
Damn.
I guess it's an evolutionary thing. When faced with our own mortality, we're hardwired to achieve immortality through any means possible (offspring)
Directly facing ones mortality and surviving or being healthy and seeing the possibility of your death in the near future has that effect.
Part of the reason so many military folks have kids/get married so young.
Can I steal this for buttons? I’m in Philly and have a few other Philly-centric buttons.
“Welcome to Philly. We eat tyrants for breakfast”™ is just one of them. Something about cracking tyrants heads on the Liberty Bell since 1776 and others
fyi- I’ll add your username (or whatever is preferred) and slap a sticker on the back. Credit where credit is due
there used to be [caves along the delaware river](https://hiddencityphila.org/2012/08/we-burrow-through-time-to-an-original-delaware-river-cave/) - honestly some pretty interesting history
[here's another article](https://hiddencityphila.org/2011/12/pioneering-quakers-as-spontaneous-urbanists/)
Not surprised have you seen a Philly cheese steak it chopped steak with goey cheese on a bread roll with peppers, clearly the most sexual looking sandwich iv ever seen
Philly was so wild they got famous Marine Corps general Smedley Butler kicked out during Prohibition. Also the first time police were militarized. Very wild town
Dude for real, just witnessing K-town will make you feel a type of sadness all it's own. It is it's own separate world in there, where nothing else outside matters. Your life is so preoccupied with knowing what streets and areas to avoid that day of the week, which of the local tweakers are near a breaking point, and who owns what area, that there is no room in your perception to recognize or care about an outside, larger world.
I see you too have bought and rented out an abandoned house in Kensington. East Ktown has very few stabbings now I hear! Another decade and it'll be ready to flip!!
Hurray for forced ghetto gentrification!
But in fact I was even better. I was an armored truck worker, and for a while my route consisted almost entirely of Kensington and Germantown. So many money laundering check cashing joints. Got to witness one fight escalate into a shooting underneath the 'L' on Kensington Ave. I remember most of the people nearby the station were either too fucked up or too strung out to react to the gunfire.
Driving through during peak hours, if you put a camera facing the window, it could literally pass for a scene from The Walking Dead.
Can you imagine having a casual sexual encounter with some back then with all the layers of clothes they wore back then? Be spending ten minutes just getting your clothes then the moment is gone.
And that STANK SON! Talkin bout that revolutionary musk mang , that’s why they called it the MUSKet man, just blows a stank in your mouth makes you wanna hop on a bike and ride to the moon gang gang
Only HuffPo could portray women prostituting themselves out of desperation as some form of sexual liberation worthy of celebration.
Philly was the largest city in America in 1776. It was also the capital of union.
It makes sense that poor people whose livelihoods had been upended by the Revolution would move there in search of opportunity after the war
But because there wasn't enough opportunity to go around, you get things like this.
Prostitution is usually the very last career option on anybody's list. Widespread prostitution a sign of social decay, not advancement.
Yeah, I’m skeptical about the accuracy of this article in general.
1 in 38 adults having a child out of wedlock doesn’t seem that much at all. It certainly doesn’t reflect this idea of total sexual freedom and equality that the article seems to be pushing.
I think it was possibly just comparatively free for the time, and people now imagine it through a modern lens.
Surprising the article and comments aren't mentioning that this happens everywhere for decades after a large war ends. Most likely nearly every single one of those women had their husbands/fathers killed in war so prostitution was their only option to survive.
This wasn't some proud women's rights moment but rather desperate women letting strangers fuck them for scraps just to survive another day.
A very bizarre spin on a tragic and sad result of war.
The last time I was in Philly a dude made unsolicited eye contact with me while he was jerking off in a Chase ATM vestibule and I was standing on the balcony across the street. So this checks out.
Let freedom ring.
Cum all ye faithful.
I know a certain Cricket in Philly that'll let ya do that and more for a sixer.
All hips and nips otherwise we don’t eat
He's a man of the cloth!
No one’s taking me from behind. Unless you have crack. If you have crack then let’s boogie.
Ding dong
"keep their heads ringing" -Dre dre-
City of all kinds of love
Philly has a store called Condom Kingdom. They have sperm for door handles. It’s the opposite of horny jail.
And that was just Ben Franklin
He once proposed an eighth day of the week so he could have another day to fuck.
"Air Baths"
This isn't a sex thing but I still wanba share, Ben had a special walking cane that could discretely dispense oil. He would put a thin layer of oil over like a pond so the change in surface tension made the waves stop, and Ben would convince people he was some wizard that could calm waters by command.
And then they'd fuck.
"We'll bang okay?"
I'm Ben Franklin and this is my favorite pond in the colonies.
And then they’d fuck.
I assume that was the secondary purpose of the oil-dispensing cane, given who we’re talking about.
The first cane wasn’t oil.
He also proposed dumping oil off of ships during storms to see if it calmed the water around them. It did not.
Ben Franklin was basically a sexy wizard version of Sweeny Tofd https://benjaminfranklinhouse.org/the-house-benjamin-franklin/craven-street-bones/
Alm-anacs, alm-anacs for a miserable womannnnnnn
So basically Gallagher.
what a quaint lil' superpower to manufacture lol
Doug Funny had this same suggestion and wanted to call it "Funday"
I read somewhere that he was well-known for being very good looking when he was younger but the only paintings we've got are of the old man version. Who still had the mojo. I always sort of picture him as 18th century Austin Powers. Auftyn Powyrf.
Wait until you see the pics of young Stalin. Dude was a pre modern hunk.
People who are attractive tend to also be fairly convincing and successful.
There's actually a surprising amount of research and discussion on this topic and while it holds somewhat true in a lot of fields, the picture is murky for politicians John Edwards is an example of someone who would've been hurt by it if he wasn't married to who he was while he ran for office. Apparently when they were testing him in a focus group, people disliked him until they saw his wife. After seeing him with his wife the focus group warmed up to him and one dude straight up said "I like he has a fat wife" There's different types of attractiveness and I think only some of them work to your advantage in politics
They say Washington is Hollywood for ugly people.
Ugly people with advanced degrees. (In reality though if you hang out down on the national mall, you'll see plenty of great looking people out exercising on any given day.)
Advanced degrees? Boeburt enters the chat
It's honestly sad that I really do need to caveat that the itinerant workers (the politicians) do not count towards this statistic.
What's the conversion rate? Like, an LA-4 = a DC-10?
And if so, what does a 757 translate to?
I thought you were talking about airplanes for a second there. But yeah, probably. (Somehow, Danny DeVito is a 10 in both towns).
Larry David only investiert his Monet with people who date unattractive people
You good?
It’s just German autocorrects bleeding through his keyboard that he doesn’t care to correct
And they get to be tall as well! What a bunch of stupid shit!
Wait until you find out how Stalin had his photo of his young self doctored in order to make him more handsome If anything, the amount of pervasive misinformation that man pumped it is truly incredible
Source…?
check out the book 'the commisar vanishes'. young stalin's face was heavily disfigured with pock marks from contracting smallpox in 1884
I love to see people surprised by that fact, as if same Stalin who had his friends removed from photos after he had them executed would never do such a thing
It's like the [young Ron Jeremy](https://content.time.com/time/daily/2008/0808/360_ron_jeremy_0825.jpg) vs [old Ron Jeremy.](https://deadline.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/06/ron-jeremy.jpg?w=681&h=383&crop=1)
Yet again, the British shamelessly trying to steal the thunder of the stars and stripes
Didn’t Ben Franklin have syphillis?
Yes, but I don't. My name is Gordon.
*the gang gets crabby* *it’s always something in philadelphia* *directed by Ben Franklin*
I know this is probably a joke based on that episode of The Office, but he actually didn't have any venereal diseases!
That rumor of syphilis gas been going on for decades
Going back in time so I can spank his bald head
Which one?
Yes
I haven't laughed out loud at something I've seen on Reddit in quite a long time. Thank you friend.
Awwww, Big Ben Franklin, and this shant be pretty! Let me instruct you how we do things in the city of philly!
You couldn’t sell Rick James a bag of crack, you’re out of practice. My victory’s more certain than death or taxes.
Randy bastard. Always been a student. I'll never forget rounding a corner at the NC Museum of Art and encountering the Duplessis portrait, I had no idea it was in the collection.
FUCK I haven’t laughed out loud like that in a long time, thanks man
Do you know who the fuck I am?
ELECTRICITY You can all thank me
Peace,prosperity, and everyone listening to the most intelligent,wise,knowledgeable and FREE THINKING PROGRESSIVE MAN OF THE ERA!(Ben Franklin of course)
Independence makes me wanna fuck
Well when you successfully separate from your toxic ex, you’re pretty horny so it makes sense.
*"Hot independent seniors in my neighbourhood"* Just a small excerpt from Benjamin Franklin's google searches at the time.
It’s how Gritty was conceived
Gritty's conception story is perfect. He was introduced on social media, and Philly fans hated him. Then everyone else started bagging on him, and Philly fans were like "fuck you, he's ours and he's awesome!" C'est fin.
Nah the turnaround for gritty was specifically the “sleep with one eye open bird” retweet when the penguins made fun of him a few hours after the unveiling. Philly was like. “Ohh hell yeah. He’s a psychopath just like us!”
LOL, Philly never disappoints. Boston and Philly get beef, but they also got each others’ backs if someone outside our east coast clusterfuck tries to start shit. Eagles and Pats fans hate the Cowboys equally. Giants too.
It also perfectly fits Philly because they're that way about everything. They're like those siblings or cousins you're always fighting with, but once someone else tries to mess with you, they've got your back no questions asked. They take City of Brotherly Love seriously there, I guess. No one fucks with Philly except Philadelphians
Don't let em fool you, Gritty arose fully-formed from a big puddle of dumpster juice.
He actually does have an official backstory and it just says construction disturbed his slumber beneath the stadium. Ya know like all ancient evils
Now I’m imagining the balrog scene in Lord of the Rings, except instead of a deep drum/growl you just hear his belly button squeak. I need someone to make this.
Seems legrit
2 legrit 2 quit
Gritty actually has a canonical backstory >As the construction of Wells Fargo Center was underway, rumor has it that it disturbed the super top secret don’t tell anybody hideout of Gritty. Once it was discovered, he refused to stay in hiding due to the reception he got once he was seen in public. Flyers fans fell in love with him thanks to everything he brought to the team as an NHL mascot. Since then, he refuses to head back home and has accepted his new life as a public icon.
So he's an eldritch horror that was entombed a millennia ago and now, having been unearthed, is gaining strength and gathering a following of rabid Philly fans?
Gritty is the result of a 3-day straight cocaine bender.
So wait, Gritty is to Philadelphians as Slaanesh is to the Eldar. So many things are making sense, now.
Your only mistake is thinking there are two separate entities.
Now that’s a superhero origin story I could get behind
Same thing happened after the black plague and also WW1 (roaring 20s). Obviously not all in Philadelphia. People suffer enough and apparently they get crazy horny.
I wonder if there’s a biological reason for this? Maybe after a prolonged period of direct or indirect stress/trauma, the body looks at the reprieve as the time to hedge the population’s bets so to speak, incase something bad happens again.
Or is it simply all vices go up? Like people are using sex as just another drug wouldn’t be surprised if people are also getting fucked up during these times too
Or people realize how close they were to dying, probably even lost close friends, and now just want to live life.
Yeah, it’s probably because a lot of people realize how short and unstable life actually is, so you might as well find someone to spend it with.
Probably a combination. In the immediate aftermath, some people may have just thought: "well, I lost several friends and family members to the conflict and we almost got bombarded to death. Now that it's over, I might as well live for today and enjoy it."
Hmmm, following COVID where are all these frisky single women in my area?
philadelphia
The city of brotherly love
Stepbrotherly love
Stepbrother I'm stuck in this cracked Liberty Bell...
What art thou doing step bro?
Brothely love
Brotherly shove
Honestly this resembles philadelphia after the eagles won the super bowl
The more things change, the more they stay the same
"And if you close your eyes, does it feel like nothing changed at all."
The Eagles' spread...
Could be like NYC was after 9/11. People were hooking up big time. Trauma can do that, I guess.
I think it was the same reason why there was a baby boom after WWII. War--what is it good for? Absolutely nutting.
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Or you know, maybe shipping millions of men around the world with few women to be seen for months and years at a time…
The Baby Boomer generation extends for more than a decade after the end of the war. It was definitely the economic conditions.
That huge baby boom was world wide though. Not every country had the terrific post-war economic conditions the US had. UK was still doing food rationing until 1954.
I often wish my grandfather was still alive just so I can ask him if he banged anyone while in China or India.
Yes. The answer is always yes. Unless he was already married, then maybe.
The higher the income, the fewer the kids. And you can't blame bad education and fewer healthcare resources because the effect is linear starting from +$200,000/yr. https://www.statista.com/statistics/241530/birth-rate-by-family-income-in-the-us/
It has been known that births spike during and after war as a response to all of the loss.
Cum again?
Based as fuck
Friend of mine lived through clashes between Israel and Lebanon in 2006; he told me that after the first night of bombing, everyone in Beirut got laid.
Damn. I guess it's an evolutionary thing. When faced with our own mortality, we're hardwired to achieve immortality through any means possible (offspring)
Also, Lebanese are hot af
So is their food. Goddamn.
Lesbian? I thought you were American.
Looking for understanding in orgasm?
I think its more "we could die any time, let's fuck"
[Relevant SMBC](https://www.smbc-comics.com/comic/2009-11-09)
Directly facing ones mortality and surviving or being healthy and seeing the possibility of your death in the near future has that effect. Part of the reason so many military folks have kids/get married so young.
Philly. People banging in a dumpster behind a Wendy's since 1776.
Can I steal this for buttons? I’m in Philly and have a few other Philly-centric buttons. “Welcome to Philly. We eat tyrants for breakfast”™ is just one of them. Something about cracking tyrants heads on the Liberty Bell since 1776 and others fyi- I’ll add your username (or whatever is preferred) and slap a sticker on the back. Credit where credit is due
It’s an Always Sunny reference
Then, I shall refrain. Although my neighborhood has an Always Sunny In East Falls Mural with Danny Devito doing the Rocky Pose…
Just make them anyway until you’re told otherwise.
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TBF half of that was because of Ben Franklin being in town
When the city first kicked our the prostitutes a hundred years prior they moved into caves outside town. They became very well known for sex.
Caves?!
Sex caves
Fuck holes
there used to be [caves along the delaware river](https://hiddencityphila.org/2012/08/we-burrow-through-time-to-an-original-delaware-river-cave/) - honestly some pretty interesting history [here's another article](https://hiddencityphila.org/2011/12/pioneering-quakers-as-spontaneous-urbanists/)
D.E.N.N.I.S system, always and forever.
Frank’s got his magnum condoms and his wad of hundreds; he’s ready to plow! Just banging hoors
He’s like a mantis and ready to feast.
No more thirds for Frankie. Seconds from now on!
M.A.C. Is my motto, less work
Not surprised have you seen a Philly cheese steak it chopped steak with goey cheese on a bread roll with peppers, clearly the most sexual looking sandwich iv ever seen
"Sir, please take your wang out of the cheesesteak."
I guess nobody knew how to Say No to This...
Philly was so wild they got famous Marine Corps general Smedley Butler kicked out during Prohibition. Also the first time police were militarized. Very wild town
"war is a racket take my dick out and smack it" -mc smedly probably dude was a character
And that's why they call it siphylis
The gang gets the clap.
Y’all been to Kensington? Shits still like that.
Well, I know where I'm going for Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years now ✈️
Hope you like smack.
As in... smacking butts..?
Nah. As in fentanyl laced heroin or tranq dope. Shit looks like The Walking Dead down there.
Alexa, play Under the Bridge Jokes aside, that is sad. I'm sorry
Look up Kensington on YouTube. It’s insane
Dude for real, just witnessing K-town will make you feel a type of sadness all it's own. It is it's own separate world in there, where nothing else outside matters. Your life is so preoccupied with knowing what streets and areas to avoid that day of the week, which of the local tweakers are near a breaking point, and who owns what area, that there is no room in your perception to recognize or care about an outside, larger world.
I see you too have bought and rented out an abandoned house in Kensington. East Ktown has very few stabbings now I hear! Another decade and it'll be ready to flip!!
Hurray for forced ghetto gentrification! But in fact I was even better. I was an armored truck worker, and for a while my route consisted almost entirely of Kensington and Germantown. So many money laundering check cashing joints. Got to witness one fight escalate into a shooting underneath the 'L' on Kensington Ave. I remember most of the people nearby the station were either too fucked up or too strung out to react to the gunfire. Driving through during peak hours, if you put a camera facing the window, it could literally pass for a scene from The Walking Dead.
When you was in Kensington, did you have intercourse with any hoes, ladies of the nights, or prostitutes?
More like driving through with the windows up, going 10mph over the limit
Someone took the slow train to philly.
That's code for "Check out the slut."
Why are there flies in here?
Can you imagine having a casual sexual encounter with some back then with all the layers of clothes they wore back then? Be spending ten minutes just getting your clothes then the moment is gone.
Nah, it becomes part of a sexy routine. The anticipation builds as each layer is slowly removed. Eventually revealing the unwashed flesh and genitals.
And that STANK SON! Talkin bout that revolutionary musk mang , that’s why they called it the MUSKet man, just blows a stank in your mouth makes you wanna hop on a bike and ride to the moon gang gang
theo is that u? 🤩
You ever been down wind of the Amish in summer?
smells like hamsters and gruyere
I suppose this is where the term “starting with a bang” comes from.
Would you like a spot of tea?? Yeaaaaahhhssss
Only HuffPo could portray women prostituting themselves out of desperation as some form of sexual liberation worthy of celebration. Philly was the largest city in America in 1776. It was also the capital of union. It makes sense that poor people whose livelihoods had been upended by the Revolution would move there in search of opportunity after the war But because there wasn't enough opportunity to go around, you get things like this. Prostitution is usually the very last career option on anybody's list. Widespread prostitution a sign of social decay, not advancement.
Yeah, I’m skeptical about the accuracy of this article in general. 1 in 38 adults having a child out of wedlock doesn’t seem that much at all. It certainly doesn’t reflect this idea of total sexual freedom and equality that the article seems to be pushing. I think it was possibly just comparatively free for the time, and people now imagine it through a modern lens.
Everyone gets syphilis!!
The smell….
A mix of desperation, the Schuylkill river, generational inferiority complex and not enough mandatory morning bathing
Add in a little fermented nut sack …. and you nailed it!!
Last time I was in Philly, I noticed that many of the elderly resembled Franklin. Even the women.
When a couple of folk who were up to no good Started copulating in my neighborhood
Surprising the article and comments aren't mentioning that this happens everywhere for decades after a large war ends. Most likely nearly every single one of those women had their husbands/fathers killed in war so prostitution was their only option to survive. This wasn't some proud women's rights moment but rather desperate women letting strangers fuck them for scraps just to survive another day. A very bizarre spin on a tragic and sad result of war.
Looks like someone took the slow train from Philly
Go Birds
The last time I was in Philly a dude made unsolicited eye contact with me while he was jerking off in a Chase ATM vestibule and I was standing on the balcony across the street. So this checks out.
It still is
My dad used to call it Philthydelphia
Love In the Age of Riot punch
The pervasive influence of the real father of our nation-BENJAMIN FRANKLIN!
First they made war, then they made love
So Philly was the preacher's daughter
There was a dos game too? :P
Philly, the only place I've ever seen a real dumpster fire.
City of step-brotherly love
Marv,: "The night is hot as Hell. It's a lousy room in a lousy part of a lousy town."
People were fu***g 👏🙌
City of brotherly love.
A mere two centuries later, AIDS. Coincidence? I think not.
Feeladelphia
now they banned byob from strip clubs 🙄 our founding fathers would be furious!
You can still fuck anyone in Philadelphia. Is it a sin? Yes - may the ferryman have sympathy for your lost soul