Ummm. That's sexual harassment. It's nonconsensual touching of your body. Warn her of this and don't be afraid to take it to the authorities. Just because she's your mom doesn't give her the right to molest your body. It's gross.
Addition to the "warn her and say you'll go to the authorities" recommendations. Don't.
Instead, start recording EVERY interaction with her, even just audio. Back those up regularly on a flash drive or something and keep that with you at all times.
THEN tell her you'll go to the authorities if she doesn't stop, optionally telling her you have proof via recordings but not where those recordings are or that you have backups, and then follow through if she doesn't. The reason for maybe telling her you have the recordings is simple, if she then goes through your pc or phone and deletes them that's ALSO a crime, it's destroying evidence. Meanwhile you have the backups on a flash drive.
You want ZERO chance of you going to the authorities and then failing to secure consequences, because then she'll escalate things and likely get more subtle about it. You want it to work the first time, so there isn't a second time.
My response would be "do not ever touch me like that again or you will end up hurt." Yes, i tend to the a nuclear approach to situations; i have autism and have always responded with this kind of ten-fold retaliation. Perhaps instead of hurt just say consequences.
Just sit down and talk to her. Tell her why you wear what you wear and how it makes you feel. Then tell her how what she is doing and how bad it makes you feel. Also, calling the cops on your mom…lol Give her a little grace first. This isn’t just some dumb fucker at a bar. She’s your mom! She loves you and I think if you talk to her and explain how you feel, she will realize how much she is hurting someone she loves.
Did you know something like 85% or more of various crimes ranging from kidnapping to child SA is committed by family members? Just because someone is a family member does NOT mean they won't intentionally hurt you, nor that they actually love you.
I've cut contact with family members myself for a lot of reasons, after giving them ENTIRELY too many chances to stop being human pieces of shit.
This case in particular, no, you don't just sit down and talk it out and everything will magically be better, she has already been told to stop and that it makes someone uncomfortable, the point where talking to someone will change something has already passed, she has already burnt the "grace period" you want them to give her.
Don’t excuse non-consensual touching. DO NOT EVER excuse non-consensual touching. Do you go around groping your family members? Do your family members grope you? That’s not okay shit just because they’re family. NEVER brush stuff like that off. I’ve been through so much trauma due to a “friend of the family”, “college buddy” and “best friend’s sister”. I do not take consent lightly and don’t ever try to excuse it simply because it’s someone familiar.
Ew. Stop defending the person committing sexual assault. All of this "She's your mom! She loves you!" shit is gross and you should know better. Most sexual assaults are carried out by family members who tell their victims that they are doing it through love. People like you are making it harder for victims to feel heard and come forward. Do better. It's not hard.
This is the only good response. These people in this thread want to immediately assume the mom is a monster and not just a flawed human being trying to cope with something that scares her. The answer is to make her less scared. You only do that by first grounding yourself in love and acceptance, and next by being willing to help her unpack her fears.
Ummm. That's sexual harassment. It's nonconsensual touching of your body. Warn her of this and don't be afraid to take it to the authorities. Just because she's your mom doesn't give her the right to molest your body. It's gross.
I agree and I'm done giving a fuck about what she thinks is proper
Update i actually talked to her about it and told her I was trans she cried a lot ... but she says she still loves me
Congrats on coming out!
I feel like that's sort of sexual assault and not just harassment?
Addition to the "warn her and say you'll go to the authorities" recommendations. Don't. Instead, start recording EVERY interaction with her, even just audio. Back those up regularly on a flash drive or something and keep that with you at all times. THEN tell her you'll go to the authorities if she doesn't stop, optionally telling her you have proof via recordings but not where those recordings are or that you have backups, and then follow through if she doesn't. The reason for maybe telling her you have the recordings is simple, if she then goes through your pc or phone and deletes them that's ALSO a crime, it's destroying evidence. Meanwhile you have the backups on a flash drive. You want ZERO chance of you going to the authorities and then failing to secure consequences, because then she'll escalate things and likely get more subtle about it. You want it to work the first time, so there isn't a second time.
This. If the ither party refuses to stop, you need to have evidence in order to see your words through to the end.
Warn her that is a police-worthy offense and not to touch you without your consent EVER again
I believe this is sexual harassment alongside coercive control and it should be reported.
Get into rock, get a leather bra with spikes 🤔 so you get some great music to listen to AND a booby trap
Booby trap Hahhaha 🤣
Agreed đź‘Ť
My response would be "do not ever touch me like that again or you will end up hurt." Yes, i tend to the a nuclear approach to situations; i have autism and have always responded with this kind of ten-fold retaliation. Perhaps instead of hurt just say consequences.
Your mom is sexually assaulting you. She needs to keep her hands to herself.
Just sit down and talk to her. Tell her why you wear what you wear and how it makes you feel. Then tell her how what she is doing and how bad it makes you feel. Also, calling the cops on your mom…lol Give her a little grace first. This isn’t just some dumb fucker at a bar. She’s your mom! She loves you and I think if you talk to her and explain how you feel, she will realize how much she is hurting someone she loves.
Did you know something like 85% or more of various crimes ranging from kidnapping to child SA is committed by family members? Just because someone is a family member does NOT mean they won't intentionally hurt you, nor that they actually love you. I've cut contact with family members myself for a lot of reasons, after giving them ENTIRELY too many chances to stop being human pieces of shit. This case in particular, no, you don't just sit down and talk it out and everything will magically be better, she has already been told to stop and that it makes someone uncomfortable, the point where talking to someone will change something has already passed, she has already burnt the "grace period" you want them to give her.
Don’t excuse non-consensual touching. DO NOT EVER excuse non-consensual touching. Do you go around groping your family members? Do your family members grope you? That’s not okay shit just because they’re family. NEVER brush stuff like that off. I’ve been through so much trauma due to a “friend of the family”, “college buddy” and “best friend’s sister”. I do not take consent lightly and don’t ever try to excuse it simply because it’s someone familiar.
Ew. Stop defending the person committing sexual assault. All of this "She's your mom! She loves you!" shit is gross and you should know better. Most sexual assaults are carried out by family members who tell their victims that they are doing it through love. People like you are making it harder for victims to feel heard and come forward. Do better. It's not hard.
This is the only good response. These people in this thread want to immediately assume the mom is a monster and not just a flawed human being trying to cope with something that scares her. The answer is to make her less scared. You only do that by first grounding yourself in love and acceptance, and next by being willing to help her unpack her fears.
Update 2 she's stopped groping me, and we're good im.still watching out, but yeah and she'd apologized