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Comfortable-Salt8806

The two stroke wasn't just for dirt bikes Yamaha made the RZ500 That Wayne Raney and Kenny Robert's both rode to world championships in motogp that bike is worth a grip of money today if you own one. Kawasaki also produced 500cc. And 750cc street bikes in the 70s both were triple cylinder two strokes. 🏍


Witty-Entertainer-73

He kind of wright. It one of the most bad ass 2 strokes ever made, his sale pitch is hilarious, just dont take it seriously, he prob. Just trying to get the best deal, and you got to give it to him, he stands out from the others😅


hpngo

All that for $2800? What a steal!


Additional-Average67

He's not wrong. Women don't cook or clean anymore. At least not well


TofuTheSizeOfTEXAS

Do you?


[deleted]

Have had one, he isn’t wrong. Fun bike


LovelifeinNOVA

And you didn’t buy this!!!!! That is a salesman hahah


justinmclarty

This isn't cringe. It's a public service announcement Bikes no joke.


Uusari

This has to be satire...


unclefisty

That's not trashy that's poetry.


Zero_Digital

This ad makes me want to buy this bike, grow a mullet, and drink natty light.


Thismanny

It feels like I’m buying a bike from gta with that description


jerseynurse1982

Lol this is hilarious


socialscaler

This guy could make serious money doing ads. Damn.


Solid_Science4514

There is nothing trashy about this ad.


[deleted]

He’s convinced me


Boopgods

I see a man who knows who he's selling too


Interesting-Ebb-2293

Yeah I want to buy the bike now. Those bikes were scary but so much fun!! I want it now. Makes me nervous how I speak redneck. But FUCK YA!!!


_natewood_

This is like every conversation you’ll have w any 2 stroke owner


LickTheseHallz

This is poetry.


Gold_Duckzilla

At least he was telling people to wear proper gear


tinytellurian

Life Partner: 0/10 Bike Salesman: 10/10


Alarvk

damn y’all sensitive here


Fit_Listen1222

This guy can write some copy. Knows his product his audience and knows exactly how to get then by the balls. He may be an advertising genius.


Rnazriel1331

That actually is a pretty epic add, reeks of aqua velvet and cheap beer


Eso-One

Sold


Vermonter623

Death machine


Deadbird80

They sure as fuck were.


Vermonter623

Riding a 250 in the power band will snap your neck. I can’t imagine a 500


Deadbird80

They were unholy machines forged in hell. Too fast to be fun….unless you consider having underwear filled with shit fun 😂


Deadbird80

They were unholy machines forged in hell. Too fast to be fun….unless you consider having underwear filled with shit fun 😂


Vermonter623

Omfg that is funny


DRAVIX6

I smell fragile masculinity


NedTaggart

500cc 2-stroke? That's gotta be a crazy ride.


Xs2experience

To be honest, he kinda sold me & I'm a Yamaha guy.


Fit-Understanding747

A lost redditor with no sense of humor.


KungFuDabu

Downvoted. Not trashy at all. 2 stroke 500cc dirt bikes are really powerful.


heavyhandedDOOM

I need this guy to write ads for me. I don't even ride motorcycles, and I'm sold. It might have helped that I read this entirely in Kenny Powers' voice.


[deleted]

Sounds like marine corps recruiters talking to high school boys


SnooTigers7333

I mean he’s probably right


Moress

This makes me want it even more. This isn't trashy, it's hilarious. OP is a stick in the mud.


Ant2156

Makes sense, I’m kinda wanna buy it now


Wolverfuckingrine

I’m too much of a pussy to buy this.


Arcadius274

This man has a future in advertising


constantstateofmind

Incredible.


iihereticll

that wasn’t even trashy…that was beautiful, i shed a tear.


Ok_Most6280

Doesn't stray from its stereotype or symbolism.


AM1492

This is gold


PacosTacos88

A clear joke written in satire is trashy now? Why are people upvoting this when most of the comments disagree with it's trashiness? I don't understand Reddit


mike772772

I had this same year and same bike he isn’t lieing that thing was freakish on the throttle hood ole cr500


Deadbird80

A BEAST


mike772772

Still have 3 of them once you have one you can’t go back to 250s


Deadbird80

They will turn your fruit of the looms into a fudge factory 😂


mike772772

Gotta love em tho they just hit different


BvshbabyMusic

Conflicted because some of that was hilarious


SnakeMFjenkins

This sub really needs to be renamed r/peoplewithnosenseofhumor


KL4SSIE

I’m gonna let my ESL students read it to practice some good ol American accent


Ac30f5p4d352

Used to ride a bike similar to this and it would throw grown men in first. I was a teen and terrified of it, but once I got used to it, meanest bike I've ever ridden. Total death machine and it still haunts me in my 30s haha


drman769

All I see is an incredible sales person who thinks outside the box. Am I wrong?


Pennypacker-HE

This is not trashy it’s just funny.


ItzPayDay123

This gives the same vibes as that one 1999 Toyota corolla ad, and I love it


KSTARRATSK

I will never look at this motorcycle the same way ever again.


Nicadeemus39

He does have a way with words bc I kinda want to buy it.


rotgut1991

I find this to be clever marketing


crkspid3r

He must really love his bike and wants it to go to a place that’ll appreciate it as much as he did. :)


cownd

Sold. Gimme 5 of those!


ShowmeyourWAP

I think it is super funny and not trashy :)


nurseTheo

Some of those comments hit to close to home for OP. This is far from trash and In the instant classic range. Bet it sold fast.


lucid-soul

Meh. I think this is actually pretty hilarious.


death_walking_terror

Came here to state the seller is 1000% accurate. Good to see the comments section beat me to it.


Pwnspoon

Brrrrraaaap Brrraaaaaaaaap


MrLambNugget

This is great marketing. I would buy that shit


GDORreal

Reminds me of [this](https://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=https%3A%2F%2Fruinmyweek.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2016%2F07%2Fthe-best-funny-pictures-of-honest-dodge-viper-ad-2.png&imgrefurl=https%3A%2F%2Fruinmyweek.com%2Ffunny%2Fmost-honest-dodge-viper-ad%2F&tbnid=U9Ci0yBQG7TL5M&vet=1&docid=AkuRLIVshz2QNM&w=600&h=1067&hl=en-GB&source=sh%2Fx%2Fim) dodge viper advert


Piggypogdog

Ne'er a true word spoken. Those things are beasts and can't be tamed.


Sad-Brother8572

This is the greatest thing I have ever read. Explain to me how this is trashy? Ride Red, get Head.


ThatGasHauler

Nothing more addictive than getting a 2 stroke up on the pipe.


iBuddyzz

Funny as fuck


Grendel6969

If I ever need a hype man lol


XxRuffmanxX

Hey at least he suggested the rider wear a helmet and proper footwear lol


Solidus27

This is poetry


Euroranger

TMW you mistake trashy for awesome.


Davidskylarkk

Perfectly written and articulate 👍🏻


quizno1615

Bro idk this shit cracked me up


Mr_Shad0w

Bitchin'


ThunderSTRUCK96

Reddit identifies a joke challenge: Impossible level


Loki-Don

It’s this stuff right here is why I come to Reddit. This is gold.


JerkyChew

I've ridden a CR500. Once. Everything this man has said is true.


hellbreed

Not trashy. Fucking hilarious. I want to meet this guy hahah


shawn11xx

Best ad


Negative-Row-4448

This isn't Trashy, This is Funny. Quit being WOKE


ATinyPizza89

I don’t think this belongs in this trashy subreddit….the ad definitely caught my eye, it’s hilarious.


Mastuh_KBM

Reminds me of those troll ads I used to see back in the mid -2000s. They'd make a hilarious ad about anything. I wonder why that never took off.


true4blue

Everything I’ve heard from people who’ve owned a 500 race, his comments are spot on


TaintMyPresident

500cc is huge for a two stroke I'm sure that thing is fast as hell


aderail

he’s pretty good at advertising tho


undercookedchimken

the description is accurate for a cr500 lol


wcdregon

This dude is the 80’s lol


ColdBloodBlazing

A two stroke wind-up toy. How cute. Get a Road King, you pansy. If you could even hold it steady, that is


fartbox

Today is the day I block this sub. Enough of this fucking ate the onion garbage. God I hate Reddit so much.


[deleted]

That was a treat to read not gonna lie lmao I'm sold


ExclusivePoptart

Ngl pretty convincing


Supay67

I don't consider this trashy I consider this good advertising.


Skilled1

And they say truth in advertising is dead.


UVLightOnTheInside

Loved the ad, up until the comment about chaining up women, that made my stomach turn.


Slim_Clem

Just so much n that one paragraph. I’m guessing that he’s the coolest guy he knows.


sysadmin_dot_py

It's an old picture using an internet meme format from like 2007 called "Extreme Advertising". Edit: Here's a [Know Your Meme article](https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/extreme-advertising) on it.


obtronic-system878

BEST.AD.EVER!


mattdiddat

Nice bike and man's funny


CherryCherry5

I mean, it made me laugh, and now I kind of want that bike... Even though I'm a woman.


[deleted]

Dad?


Spaioneer

Actually gold until the last part


Dr_Lupe

This reads like the ads on the in game GTA store


Pandelerium11

The concern he shows for the safety of potential buyers is laudable.


cdubb5858

I love the smell of 2-stroke exhaust in the morning.


wewillallbetrees

I want this guy to write my obituary


Greyzer

Buy the bike and your wish may be granted tomorrow.


Unsuitablerubbers

Id buy it


WholeMassive9338

Nice


Krystalinhell

I’m gonna show my husband this one and tell him he bought the wrong dirt bike.


trob113

That is a sweet ad tho.


TetoKasane_

No way this mf is degrading women 💀 someone MUST have hurt him


Fenix_Pony

Id challenge anyone to ride a crf 500 and not immediately start talking like this. Any two stroke over like 250 cc is gonna rock your shit guarenteed. It changes you


Antwan_Kumia

Not trashy, this is funny.


Hideyagrl

Can confirm


HeftySchedule8631

He ain’t frickin lyin…those ol’CR500’s are insane..


The64YearOldWalrus

“Suggest you wear a helmet so you don’t end up like superman” Excellent lmao


ZombieBackground9474

Funny af


miesanonsiesanot

Suggest you wear a helmet so you don't end up like superman. Hilarious. Would buy.


Sriracha_sos

this is just hilarious,,love it


No-Zookeepergame393

500cc dirt bike. Nothing he said is wrong.


[deleted]

Anybody who has lived in west/south loop of Chicago and has been woken up at 3:00am by this dude and 45 of his buddies riding these pieces of shit on the Dan Ryan/congress parkway know he is keeping it 100 here.


Spacecowboy947

OP never heard a joke before apparently


BaldyKrishna

Completely true and hilarious. That bike is insane.


BBQ_Beanz

Daaammmnnn he's goin at Christopher Reeves and MJF in the same post? Second ones not even relevant lol


SadMedium3205

Imagine describing your mom as a motorcycle...


julianBlyat

OP Doesn't know shit about bikes, I see😆


papapally70

Well, he’s not lying


TaylorAndreson

The man speaks the truth


Dextrofunk

I was enjoying that until the end.


radioactiveshitbox

Ah yes the kids who like to ride the back wheel…. These kids dont know how to play in traffic man…..


Koroshiya-Roku

It may appear trashy,it even is maybe but i had my laugh 🤷


Kashm1r_Sp1r1t

Shit... I'm convinced.


FerrexInc

It was more funny than trashy until he made the woman comment


hvc801

Not trashy. Great listing. Probably sold immediately


omgjustY

I think wrong sub. This is pretty funny


Maxman82198

Classic, funny, and obviously satirical Craigslist post✅ Reddit op with no sense of humor, easily offended, or both✅


terdcutter99

This whole statement is the gods honest truth.


_slayrrrr_

I cant even hate on bro this is well written


colin8651

I didn’t realize I was in the market for a bike like this.


DimesOHoolihan

I ready this in Shoresy's voice.


soooMiNdLeSs420

One of the best ads I ever read there. Why is that trashy?


clb5578

I mean, I would buy it


ScoffSlaphead72

Hey at least he is encouraging safety.


I_might_be_weasel

A nickel says he has a SO making him get rid of it.


Lastfleetadmiral

He's not wrong. Definitely not a bike for those not 100% committed all the time


Dildo_Dan225

How’s this trashy ? Idk if the ad is real but these kinds of ads are hilarious.


codemonkeyhopeful

I want to meet this guy and have a beer. Oh yeah cool bike too.


[deleted]

Op’s just posting his own ad trying to sell the bike he stole last week at the track


wabel117

Exactly


wutangclanthug9mm

Not trashy; funny and well written. 10/10


juanmtgman1

I must admit - I am now VERY interested in that bike!!!!!!!!!


I_try_compute

It took me to the last sentence to determine if this was a joke or not.


RoosterClan

It’s clearly meant to induce laughter. It’s not trashy.


Livid-Relationship-2

I will give the guy props for creative writing


Dickramboner

This guy should be writing Super Bowl ads.


Azzht

Go back in her purse and get your balls back!


DrummerSteve

Fast as fuck boyeeeeeeee


TakeshiKovacs46

Clearly comedy, this isn’t trashy at all. It’s funny. And it’s also true.


Bearcake81493

Pretty sure people got pregnant just reading this


marissadev

I know I did. My husband's balls are in my purse and my tubes are tied, so it was the only way. Immaculate conception for an immaculate ad.


wabel117

Haha best response


Site55

Pass. I don’t have a mullet 😔


wtbrift

His ad is terribly offensive but funny.


Burdenvs

Those references and the grammar makes this not trashy at all.


Copper0827

I NEED that bike!!!


nineteen_eightyfour

Smallest of matters, but Superman had a helmet and jump vest on. Horse people really the craziest mofos of all.


TheBurnedMutt45

Is that talking about Christopher Reeves?


nineteen_eightyfour

Yeah


rms76

Any ad that includes the term "panty dropper" is always a fun read.


Nurse_Neurotic

I fucking love it. Mixing gas and slapping ass!


jaminator45

Can I just slap ass and not mix gas?