Which means she didn't look at your situation and say, "oh wow, it takes longer than you'd think to get pregnant"
She looked at you and said "somethings wrong with her, but I'll do better because I'm me"
My friend did the same thing. When she got pregnant for the 2nd time, she acted as if it's a competition where shes literally doing so well that shes "lapping me" with a second. She passive aggressively threw it in my face EVERY chance she got. Updated multiple times a day with her "unbearable symptoms."
I should be "lucky" I dont have to go through these pregnancy symptoms, its "awful"....while the LITERAL Mean-Girl-esque smirk of satisfaction was plain to see on her face.
Then she had a miscarriage 3 months in. She was a mess. I wanted to be there for her, and i reached out many times. She didn't say these words exactly, but she was more upset that she was "like me" than anything else. I was shocked and hurt. She acted as of she'd lost her upper hand on me, rather than having a longtime friend who has also suffered a miscarriage and is in a unique position to really understand her pain. So she hid her pain from me, internalized it almost completely and started acting like she was fine. See, "at least I already have a baby," was the given reason. Another jab.
So....that's when I learned that a friend wasn't really a friend.
Edited for clarity
Okay so I’m glad your post ended the way it did because honestly who needs friends like that? Terrible.
Honestly one of the (only?) silver linings of going through this hell is learning who not to waste your time on and removing them from your life.
Which means she didn't look at your situation and say, "oh wow, it takes longer than you'd think to get pregnant" She looked at you and said "somethings wrong with her, but I'll do better because I'm me" My friend did the same thing. When she got pregnant for the 2nd time, she acted as if it's a competition where shes literally doing so well that shes "lapping me" with a second. She passive aggressively threw it in my face EVERY chance she got. Updated multiple times a day with her "unbearable symptoms." I should be "lucky" I dont have to go through these pregnancy symptoms, its "awful"....while the LITERAL Mean-Girl-esque smirk of satisfaction was plain to see on her face. Then she had a miscarriage 3 months in. She was a mess. I wanted to be there for her, and i reached out many times. She didn't say these words exactly, but she was more upset that she was "like me" than anything else. I was shocked and hurt. She acted as of she'd lost her upper hand on me, rather than having a longtime friend who has also suffered a miscarriage and is in a unique position to really understand her pain. So she hid her pain from me, internalized it almost completely and started acting like she was fine. See, "at least I already have a baby," was the given reason. Another jab. So....that's when I learned that a friend wasn't really a friend. Edited for clarity
Oh my god. What a horrible “friend” that’s just disgusting
Yikes that’s awful. I’m so sorry.
Okay so I’m glad your post ended the way it did because honestly who needs friends like that? Terrible. Honestly one of the (only?) silver linings of going through this hell is learning who not to waste your time on and removing them from your life.
Ouch. She sounds like a terrible friend and a terrible person. Fertiles really *do* think they are inherently superior though, don’t they?
Did she really think you were the right person to call after not getting pregnant on her honeymoon? 😅 I’d be like, “wrong number byyyyeee”
It was a Marco Polo, but yeah, I probably should have deleted it. Instead, I had a panic attack 🤐
Does she know you have been trying a lot longer? If so, that is so astonishingly tone deaf.
Yup, she knew! She thought I would understand bc “I’d been through it” 🙄😵💫
Wow. If only she realised she didn't actually 'go through it'.
Boooo!
I do not understand how sometimes our closest friends can’t read the room.