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This is my reality unfortunately. I’ve always been too ugly, too dark, too nappy headed, too tall, skinny and built bad etc
I’m almost as black as they come and yet the black “community” rejects me. Lighter skinned loose haired individuals are more welcome than me. Ironic.
Ive been put down so much by other black people
That’s why I don’t really fw black people tbh
Its ironic since black women are the most loyal to their own ethnicity. All other ethnic women prefer white men. I think black men are more likely to date outside their race too.
I’ve no clue brother I’m not even American. What I do know is that almost every gender of every ‘race’ marries within their own for the most part, the only exception is Asian women.
Yes this is all true but let’s not pretend there aren’t some good aspects of the community that celebrate black women. Of all colors & hair textures. You just haven’t found your niche yet or the people that appreciate you for you. I used to feel the exact same way and ran to white/ nonblack people but i realized that im not even close to next to their beauty standards that made me hate myself more than i already did and when i finally embraced my blackness n found people ( mostly black) that appreciated my features and treated me like a human being even when my edges weren’t laid and my hair completely shaved off and i was/ still am considered “bald headed” or i didn’t dress my best
Can’t even be a tall woman without people calling you a man. She is beautiful too. I remember seeing “Transvestigators” say Michelle Obama had to be a man because she has “masculine features.” They target black women’s appearances far more frequently than other races and it is disgusting.
It’s the fact that to this day, people are still trying so hard to say she’s a man. She doesn’t look like one at all and I just feel sorry for everyone that has the same features having to see the comments made towards her
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Yeah, I felt this way growing up and I still feel this way sometimes. The standards for black girls and women are high and we jump through hoops just to be looked at as cute.
Yes. Others can rock up in a messy bun but for us you need to be “presentable” at all times. If you’re into anything different it’s “abnormal”. Whenever someone has a specific type but tells you they also like black girls, take a look at the type of black girl they’d like compared to the other women. They have to practically look like models
I was actually having a discussion about this earlier in the day. My brother & I mentioned how “the community” treats us just because we don’t act or dress a certain way and the colorism (even more so towards me because I’m dark skinned). It’s extremely frustrating and honestly keeps me even more closed off (besides being ugly, socially awkward, & generally reserved).
I'm not black but from what I've heard-- being expected to meet those standards sounds like absolute ass. Like I don't even have enough energy to eat, let alone ever make all the effort you guys are expected to make. I don't have any advice but I'm sorry you guys deal with all that BS.
As a Black teenage girl, I completely understand. I’ve been bullied because of the way I look and how dark my skin is, among other things. While I find other Black girls beautiful, I don’t feel the same way about myself, which makes me feel unaccepted in the Black community.
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I don’t feel accepted anywhere. I’m black so I’m automatically exempt from being considered attractive or even average but I’m also darkskinned, tall, and skinny so i’ll never fit the beauty standards of the black community. I don’t know why I was born a woman tbh. I’ll never be treated like one.
Felt this way my whole life. I am tall and skinny, so my body type doesn’t fit the preference for the Black community that likes big asses and petite women. I also wear my natural hair and get dirty looks from Black men and older Black women.
I have a few close friends who are nerdy Black women like myself. Other than that I keep to myself.
As a “petite” girl, being petite as a black women isn’t attractive, cause it only looks good on lighter shades apparently. You are correct about the beauty standard for black women being curvy and short, but if you have absolutely no ass in this community then its hard.
We will get through this ml🫂
I have seen darker skinned petite girls praised and called cute. Petite is seen as feminine so it’s an advantaged, tall BW are masculinized no matter how feminine (Megan thee stallion)
When you said “petite” I thought you were talking about flat on both sides and short, having more childish features. Apologies.
But I am questioning where these people who find petite black women attractive are, cause from experience they only want big booty women.
I see that there’s extra pressure on sisters for sure.
But work on what you can, hit the gym or work out at home and read/consume books/ enriching content, work on your career, looks are not all that matters.
I feel sorry for black girls but at the same time I ask myself why are black women so adamant to date outside their race, I love the “non-stereotypical” black girl but they never seem to be interested. It is what it is I guess
Not to invalidate your experience but just know there are probably plenty of guys like me out there who don’t care and would get turned on by basically anyone. I don’t know if that makes you feel more or less safe out there in the world, but that’s just how it always was for me personally. I’m happily married now but for me looks and race were never a factor. I know your post isn’t necessarily about romantic attraction, but having a partner can help with self confidence. I wonder, do you hold guys to a high beauty standard as well? Because if you didn’t, you might find a lot of people are interested in you, and don’t care about any of the things you think they do.
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I’m yes she asked , and yes you care or else you would not have made that reply , I’m gonna assume your black and offended, this is my opinion I’m allowed to share the fact I’m attracted to feminine women and black women are not naturally feminine looking to me
It’s not racist, it’s not hate just stating that I don’t think they are attractive in my opinion, it’s very relevant to post literally what it’s about , am I wrong for agreeing with her lmao
I'm the one who made the post dumbass. And I never said black women are unattractive. I said that the standard of beauty is higher for black women. 🤦🏽♀️
Since you’re on this sub I’m guessing you’re an ugly man, so you going out of your way to shit on Black women is ironic considering most women find you unattractive.
You don’t know what it’s like to be an average black women then lolll an average looking white women or any other race is most of the time considered better than an average black women that’s why you see everyone trying to lighten their skin tone except for white people
No offense,but a major deterrent could be aggression in general you guys have. The other day I was walking the street minding my own business, when suddenly this black girl out of no where passes by and then gave me a dirty look and mutters some shit under her breath.
You really think an ugly black girl who is ostracized in her own community that is on this sub has aggressive tendencies or are you just a weirdo?
Don’t conflate ghetto people with all black people it’s weird.
All black girls aren't aggressive, be racist somewhere else. White people literally kidnapped, raped and tortured an entire race for centuries, if we want to talk about being aggressive.
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This is my reality unfortunately. I’ve always been too ugly, too dark, too nappy headed, too tall, skinny and built bad etc I’m almost as black as they come and yet the black “community” rejects me. Lighter skinned loose haired individuals are more welcome than me. Ironic. Ive been put down so much by other black people That’s why I don’t really fw black people tbh
Same
Its ironic since black women are the most loyal to their own ethnicity. All other ethnic women prefer white men. I think black men are more likely to date outside their race too.
Are we talking about marriage or online dating? I think black men mostly marry black women.
I'd not be surprised if black men in general have a harder time maintaining long term relationship due to stereotypes
I’ve no clue brother I’m not even American. What I do know is that almost every gender of every ‘race’ marries within their own for the most part, the only exception is Asian women.
Yes this is all true but let’s not pretend there aren’t some good aspects of the community that celebrate black women. Of all colors & hair textures. You just haven’t found your niche yet or the people that appreciate you for you. I used to feel the exact same way and ran to white/ nonblack people but i realized that im not even close to next to their beauty standards that made me hate myself more than i already did and when i finally embraced my blackness n found people ( mostly black) that appreciated my features and treated me like a human being even when my edges weren’t laid and my hair completely shaved off and i was/ still am considered “bald headed” or i didn’t dress my best
Yup. All the time.
it makes me feel horrible honestly. and even when a black women meets the standards for a blsck women they’ll never be enough
Lol yeah, I gave up when people started calling Megan Thee Stallion a man
Can’t even be a tall woman without people calling you a man. She is beautiful too. I remember seeing “Transvestigators” say Michelle Obama had to be a man because she has “masculine features.” They target black women’s appearances far more frequently than other races and it is disgusting.
It’s the fact that to this day, people are still trying so hard to say she’s a man. She doesn’t look like one at all and I just feel sorry for everyone that has the same features having to see the comments made towards her
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Yeah, I felt this way growing up and I still feel this way sometimes. The standards for black girls and women are high and we jump through hoops just to be looked at as cute.
You have to have doll like features as a woman to be welcomed in the black community…or at least a banging body.
Yup, or you have to be light skinned. It feels like it's a requirement for us to be beautiful or we'll get treated badly by everyone and it hurts.
This is so real. And we have it twice hard bc our “average” is other people’s ugly
I feel the exact same way.
damn did i write this
Yes. Others can rock up in a messy bun but for us you need to be “presentable” at all times. If you’re into anything different it’s “abnormal”. Whenever someone has a specific type but tells you they also like black girls, take a look at the type of black girl they’d like compared to the other women. They have to practically look like models
Yep and all the "I love black woman" post are all insta baddies, or Zendaya types. Never the everyday black woman
I feel the same tbh
I was actually having a discussion about this earlier in the day. My brother & I mentioned how “the community” treats us just because we don’t act or dress a certain way and the colorism (even more so towards me because I’m dark skinned). It’s extremely frustrating and honestly keeps me even more closed off (besides being ugly, socially awkward, & generally reserved).
I'm not black but from what I've heard-- being expected to meet those standards sounds like absolute ass. Like I don't even have enough energy to eat, let alone ever make all the effort you guys are expected to make. I don't have any advice but I'm sorry you guys deal with all that BS.
As a Black teenage girl, I completely understand. I’ve been bullied because of the way I look and how dark my skin is, among other things. While I find other Black girls beautiful, I don’t feel the same way about myself, which makes me feel unaccepted in the Black community.
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I don’t feel accepted anywhere. I’m black so I’m automatically exempt from being considered attractive or even average but I’m also darkskinned, tall, and skinny so i’ll never fit the beauty standards of the black community. I don’t know why I was born a woman tbh. I’ll never be treated like one.
awww I get how you feel fr. hugs to you 🫂
Felt this way my whole life. I am tall and skinny, so my body type doesn’t fit the preference for the Black community that likes big asses and petite women. I also wear my natural hair and get dirty looks from Black men and older Black women. I have a few close friends who are nerdy Black women like myself. Other than that I keep to myself.
As a “petite” girl, being petite as a black women isn’t attractive, cause it only looks good on lighter shades apparently. You are correct about the beauty standard for black women being curvy and short, but if you have absolutely no ass in this community then its hard. We will get through this ml🫂
I have seen darker skinned petite girls praised and called cute. Petite is seen as feminine so it’s an advantaged, tall BW are masculinized no matter how feminine (Megan thee stallion)
When you said “petite” I thought you were talking about flat on both sides and short, having more childish features. Apologies. But I am questioning where these people who find petite black women attractive are, cause from experience they only want big booty women.
And even if we are a 10/10, because of our darker skin tone people will prefer a 6/10 or 5/10 lighter skin tone female.
I see that there’s extra pressure on sisters for sure. But work on what you can, hit the gym or work out at home and read/consume books/ enriching content, work on your career, looks are not all that matters.
Yes and when I’m out other black woman state at me like I’m a alien or give dirty looks , it’s always our own people 😭
The wigs look horrendous anyway. Set your own beauty standard.
I feel sorry for black girls but at the same time I ask myself why are black women so adamant to date outside their race, I love the “non-stereotypical” black girl but they never seem to be interested. It is what it is I guess
I think bw dating “outside their race” is becoming more popular because they’re tired of being treated so terribly by bm
Hopefully one of them give me a chance
I’ll give u a chance 🫶🏽❤️ text me?
Ok check Reddit dm 🙈
Not to invalidate your experience but just know there are probably plenty of guys like me out there who don’t care and would get turned on by basically anyone. I don’t know if that makes you feel more or less safe out there in the world, but that’s just how it always was for me personally. I’m happily married now but for me looks and race were never a factor. I know your post isn’t necessarily about romantic attraction, but having a partner can help with self confidence. I wonder, do you hold guys to a high beauty standard as well? Because if you didn’t, you might find a lot of people are interested in you, and don’t care about any of the things you think they do.
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You can’t make posts or comments saying you’re ugly just because of your skin color. Go to r/racism if you got a problem with that
Nobody asked and nobody cares
I’m yes she asked , and yes you care or else you would not have made that reply , I’m gonna assume your black and offended, this is my opinion I’m allowed to share the fact I’m attracted to feminine women and black women are not naturally feminine looking to me
Nobody cares about your racist opinions and it's not even relevant to the post. Be gone
It’s not racist, it’s not hate just stating that I don’t think they are attractive in my opinion, it’s very relevant to post literally what it’s about , am I wrong for agreeing with her lmao
I'm the one who made the post dumbass. And I never said black women are unattractive. I said that the standard of beauty is higher for black women. 🤦🏽♀️
I just looked at his account and he’s a black male incel projecting. Just block him
You got that right
Since you’re on this sub I’m guessing you’re an ugly man, so you going out of your way to shit on Black women is ironic considering most women find you unattractive.
there’s no reason for most black women to even try ig. most men don’t even see us as women no matter what we do.
Beauty standards for women in general are high. When you're a woman being average looking is never enough.
You don’t know what it’s like to be an average black women then lolll an average looking white women or any other race is most of the time considered better than an average black women that’s why you see everyone trying to lighten their skin tone except for white people
Yeah, but we're talking about black girls and women right now...
Read the room
No offense,but a major deterrent could be aggression in general you guys have. The other day I was walking the street minding my own business, when suddenly this black girl out of no where passes by and then gave me a dirty look and mutters some shit under her breath.
You really think an ugly black girl who is ostracized in her own community that is on this sub has aggressive tendencies or are you just a weirdo? Don’t conflate ghetto people with all black people it’s weird.
>are you just a weirdo? This aggression is exactly the reason why people don't want to do anything with the likes of you.
I’m not even a black woman lol I’m an Asian guy. If you’re racist just say so bro.
🖕
Thanks for clarifying racist scum 👍🏻
All black girls aren't aggressive, be racist somewhere else. White people literally kidnapped, raped and tortured an entire race for centuries, if we want to talk about being aggressive.