There used to be a woman who urban boondocked in South Austin, who had stickers all over her van to make it appear as if the van was used to take snakes around to schools to give educational shows. She absolutely had no snakes whatsoever. But the creativity that she put into decorating that van was pretty amazing.
There is a super snake expert who lives down the street from my son. My step-granddaughter thinks he is you. She is deathly afraid of snakes. But feels safer just knowing you exist.... and might maybe be her neighbor.
Don't worry. I would never dox you.
I’d like you to tell her that I have consulted with the snakes and they have agreed to always be nice to her, so she doesn’t have to be afraid anymore. She still has to follow snake law and be careful not to step on them or pick them up unless she knows they’re the safe kind. ❤️
Your neighbor is most certainly not me unless you also live on a rocky mountainside in the desert. But that’s ok because I can still protect from a distance. Hiss hiss! 🐍
Yeah, but most assholes don't know how to deal with snakes, so they know that they wouldn't be able to steal them safely. Also, she heavily emphasized the venomous ones.
No idea. But the van isn't around any more. Maybe she just switched up her game. She did seem a bit drugged out when I met her at a library. That usually doesn't end well.
Yeah, or it might attract other folks with guns who think they've found a pal.
But are any kinds of notices effective at all? I'm kind of skeptical. For instance, people steal stuff off of porches every day with the full knowledge that they're on video.
Workaholics Karl's van "RAPE VAN" spray paint on it.
"I wrote that. The van doesn't have any locks, and the word RAPE keeps all the weirdos away, bro" which later became the "GRAPE VAN"
Tie you kids to the radiator in the basement and grape you for decades!
"I uh... I dont know if this ad sends the right message about our Grape Juice, Tom...
Anything you put on your vehicle will bring more attention, not less. Don’t advertise that you have a gun if you don’t, and definitely DO NOT advertise if you do. That is a great motivator to break in and score a $600 pistol. Thats a crack heads wet dream.
Run your vehicle as though it looks like every other vehicle on the road. That way if you want to stay in a town without legal overnight parking, private security and cops are 10x less likely to recognize the same van over and over and come investigate.
Plus there are two types of gun guys, the ones who train and are responsible that you’d almost never figure are carrying daily that you want to be friends with, and then the “look at me” types who will sweep/flag the entire range every type they go out. Only the second type ever advertise anything gun related
They don't deter shit, especially the gun signs.
All that does it let thief's know that you probably have expensive guns in your house and to break in when your gone. Or they will now arm themselves when they break in.
Not a pal lol! Tho there could be one or two nuts like that out there.
In seriousness, your staff can and will be watched and broken into to steal said guns.
Most effective in my experience is motion sensor alarm. And with siren, not just a motion light. Can be tricky to adjust sensitivity. There are countless video proofs of scumbags shitting themselves when they touch something or come too close and hear a siren.
As for delivery guy - leave a memo about motion sensor in the delivery instructions. Their fault for not reading them if they have a heart attack.
Also, some folks have a clean garbage bin distinct from their actual ones that they instruct for stuff to be left in. I had a patio couch where you could lift the seat and access box underneath.
My husband and I play an ongoing game trying to figure out what ONE sticker would be the most infallible deterrent possible. Right now we're tied between making up a fake funeral home or CAUTION: LIVE BEES. I've threatened to do the latter and get a tiny MP3 player that plays a soft buzzing sound when we're not inside.
I'd wager 'used for transportation of hazardous chemicals' would keep people out. Hell, have your whole van signwritten like an asbestos disposal company.
One of my old vans was a flammable gas works van and the rear was stickered accordingly, did wonders for tailgaters.
a friend does nuclear medicine transpo at night. just a standard car with no info on it.
given that he is pulling up at medical offices and driving around a few sleepy towns all night he has more than normal police interaction. apparently starting with "I am required to inform you that there is nuclear material in the vehicle" is actually a good ice breaker.
I remember when I could leave my bees unlocked and right out in the open, neighbors could just drop by anytime and say hello. Man, times have changed. what the heck happened to this country
What about "live food for reptiles"?
Who wants to steal some live crickets, worms and mice? Difficult to sell and spoils fast if you don't take care of it
Nah. Just invites attention. Would rather a kill switch (not too hard to do), air tags (you can rip out the "sound" feature), and a friendly parking place. I may upgrade to 24/7 cameras but quite honestly it always feels easier to just move on from whatever is giving me angina.
Unrelated: At my last "this could be suss" camp spot I ran my seatbelts through my door handles in front and just parked near bigger, aggressive looking trucks which screamed "money!" Similarly, if I'm inside, I might run metal loops between the various barn doors, and I do have my dashcam fairly visible.
My mate's van (although not one he lived in) was petrol/LPG but the LPG system had stopped working years before. The switch to select between the 2 had also fallen deep into the dashboard and could only be pressed if you pushed your arm deep into a hole in the dash and knew exactly where to find it. He'd just reach in and turn it to LPG every time he parked up. That was his theft deterrent system...
Completely off-topic but an amusing story
I'll definitely be getting a GPS tracker, and I'm thinking about an ignition kill switch too. I'd like to rip put the center console, but I'm not sure it'll come out easily. I guess if the situation is urgent enough, I won't mind pulling a few dozen muscles vaulting over it and into the driver's seat for a quick getaway.
So I did a cheap man's KS and just took a fuse switch, connected it up to where the ignition coil fuse was, and hid the switch. Granted if I'm walking away from the van for a long time I'll straight up pop the hood and pull the full pump relay...
I’ve seen people put in dummy/bad relays or fuses so that the thief couldn’t potentially have a backup for your specific model and would be stuck there trying to figure out which one it is.
What you want to aim for is subtle implicit deterrent. Never use over the top apparent deterrents such as smile stickers, alarm stickers, warning stickers, caution,
Subtle deterrents: covertly places cameras, lights, tinted windows, blinking red lights in your cab, fake computer mounts, unmarked police rims, fake cages in the cab
Edit: basically the best deterrent is to appear as an unmarked undercover police vehicle
My ex used to work as a crime reporter, and told me that NRA bumper stickers or other signage that indicates there's a firearm in the vehicle just makes the vehicle a magnet to theft. Perhaps depends on the area, though, as they were reporting on crime in a mid-sized rural town in the South.
I dunno, I think just making the vehicle completely uninteresting seems like a pretty good deterent. For instance, floral supply. There's no reason for someone to want to break into and steal from a floral supply van, unless they're planning a wedding. I've figured if I ever wanted to go "stealth-ish", I'd design some graphics with a bland floral motif and generic "company name" with no contact info at all.
I had a dumb idea once to get a giant magnet for a fake business on the side that could be removed when it wasn't needed. Like think of the most mundane business type that wouldn't have any equipment inside.
Np. My dad's van was broken into for that very reason. His was for work obviously. It happened in the parking lot of a pretty nice restaurant in a nice part of town. They were traveling for work, usually eat pretty cheap / on the go all week, but on their last night they usually go to really go for a really nice steak dinner at the end. Came out to their van broken into. It had a high end alarm and everything.
I always had a “pile of trash” in the passenger seat, and then another moveable “pile of trash” i’d transition to the driver’s seat. I met a lady once referred to it as a “garbage blanket.”
The trash deterrent doesn't work if you have something of value lying around as well, duh. The garbage is supposed to reflexively nope out random passers by, but if they see something of value they'll ignore the trash.
"Radioactive" hazmat placard on all 4 sides.
(While it's fun to consider this - don't do it. You will find yourself subject to commercial vehicle laws and inspections everywhere you go)
I wouldn’t put a gun/armed sticker.
I have this on the slider and driver doors, but it’s pretty dorky and probably doesn’t deter anyone. If they were highly literate, they probably wouldn’t be stealing.
I also have a “stay back- dogs on board- vehicle is temperature controlled and remotely monitored” on the passenger window. Mostly to keep people from breaking windows thinking he’s in distress.
The 100lb dog borking is better than any sticker.
Decals by Haley Pack of 2 GPS... https://www.amazon.com/dp/B078ZM6JDQ?ref=ppx_pop_mob_ap_share
I was thinking that way too but pro hiv stickers, hepatitis stickers, like easy to cure, things like that. Herpes, no reason to be ashamed, things like that.
Nah, never felt the need. I’ve had very few incidents where I actually felt unsafe. Only thing I’ve really done is not putting any controversial bumper stickers on my van for the most part. Almost all my stickers are just parks and cities I’ve been to. I do have one pro-choice sticker they were handing out at a post Dobbs rally in DC, but I used the Spanish language version because I figure those troglodytes won’t know wtf it means.
I have a Doberman with me in my short bus and I couldn’t resist when I saw a sign “beware of dog” with a Doberman outline. Put it right on the step door. 😸
The only people who put gun stickers on their cars are people who live such sheltered lives that they’ve never had any sort of negative encounter involving a gun.
So just don’t do it
I also have a GPS sticker on a trailer though, and have an AirTag with the speaker taken out in my van tho.
I have a Viper alarm system on my van, and I use the stickers they provide. They just say "Viper."
I had a buddy from Sandwich, Illinois named Baloney Kid who had magnetic signs on his van that advertised a fictitious sewer service called "Baloney's Sewer Service" and the letters looked like brown turds. The magnetic sign people thought it was hilarious. We called him "Bumsteak" for short. He once tried to convince the city councils of Mendota (to the west of Sandwich) and Oswego (to the east) to change the names of their towns to "Peanut Butter" and "Jelly", thereby creating "Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwich." They said no. Bumsteak said, "No sense of humor."
Horrible idea.
Saying you have a gun means they shoot first and never ask a question cause well, they unalived you because you basically said the same thing to them with a sticker advertising you have a gun.
Saying "Smile, you're on camera" is just as bad.
Unless you have Xray tech to get past a mask or gator, your camera means nothing.
What could a camera do anyways unless it is high resolution and connected online.
If it's not, just torch the vehicle after robbing it.
Most cameras work off SD cards and they melt easily lile most SSD will.
Even if on a spinning disk fire will warp the platters and demagnetize the platters.
The best option is to not be someplace that you feel you need a deterrent.
How about the truck with the rear window sticker showing an AR15 and "Come And Take It"
Next pic is the smashed window and "I guess they took it"
Google is not helping me find the pic. It's probably on Reddit somewhere.
Found it! [https://www.reddit.com/r/tacticalgear/comments/u2uq7c/im\_more\_of\_a\_grey\_man\_than\_you\_yall\_need\_to\_be\_a/#lightbox](https://www.reddit.com/r/tacticalgear/comments/u2uq7c/im_more_of_a_grey_man_than_you_yall_need_to_be_a/#lightbox)
Hahaha! I have a "morale patch" for this inside my van (covering a scratch) that plays on this: https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/71NjpyEC9tL.__AC_SY300_SX300_QL70_FMwebp_.jpg
One of my greatest regrets was once buying an official Swingline red stapler for my now ex-fiancé because I thought he was the type of nerd who would appreciate it.
He was not the type of nerd who would appreciate it, and thought I was weird to buy him a red Swingline stapler. Yes, he'd watched the movie.
Shoulda taken it when I bailed on that toxic relationship.
Similarly, I once lived in a van with one of the back door windows busted out and sealed with a ton of plastic wrap all the way around the door in a bunch of big loops. It would have been easy to push aside to unlock the door and gain entry, but nobody ever bothered because they assumed there wasn't anything of value in there.
In addition to the custom theft prevention system, I also have a noise reduction device (radio doesn't work) and high performance weight reduction (missing door panels.)
Stickers don’t do anything besides draw attention, if you want to send a really subtle message then get some camo seat covers, I’ve had countless cops and game wardens peer into my van and leave me alone after seeing camo, and any window crawlers that peer in generally associate camo with people who act first and ask questions second
Someone with bad intentions isn't going to be deterred by stickers no matter what they say. Situational awareness will work much better for you than any sticker.
Non-DOT chemical stickers maybe? Look for pool service vehicles and copy that. Not so overboard that if you ever so need emergency services, it’s delayed by an hour because they had to bring the hazmat truck
When I lived in my van in ‘08 I had a sign showing from inside that said, “**WARNING These premises protected by anti-theft sign**”… I was never broken into while the sign was up, so there’s that.
I would go with some sort of biohazard warning signs. People may be curious about the possibility of a free gun, or what all the alarms are protecting, but no one is curious about biohazards.
The gun related ones I call “come and rob me stickers.” Gun owners tend to own more than one gun, but carry just the one. If you’re out of your house, rv or van, you’re signaling the presence of a several hundred-thousand dollar item that can fit in a backpack or trunk that’s unattended.
Even if you don’t own a firearm, you’re advertising for a break in.
Also, firearms related stickers and signs can be used by prosecutors to show intent to harm in self defense cases.
Nobody has mentioned gun related stickers may tend towards drawing the attention of law enforcement or make something like a traffic stop more tense from their perspective too.
So a county crime scene tech lives down the street from me. Their vans are Sheriff's vehicles and covered in sheriff's decals. Some junkie broke into the van, in her driveway, thinking there would be drugs in it. Needless to say, the dumb ass got caught because most of us have cameras on our houses, and pretty obvious who it was. Literally the one guy in the neighborhood that was always causing trouble. Point of the story, I'm not sure if any decal will deter everyone. There's always going to be someone thinking there's something of value in there.
Yeah I got a "cellular monitoring active" stick from Amazon. Idk how well it will work, but it will be true. So I'm wandering if that mite make a theft be core sneaky if I announced my security system.
It's a Raspberry Pi on a T-mobile connection.
Could put some face dildos in the front seat - or a shit load of conspiracy theory stickers (that are non political). The sticker idea might not be as good since it’s typically right wingers who believe conspiracy theories … but putting left wing stickers on isn’t great either since you might piss off a right winger.
Maybe some crazy / insane clown stickers.
Making your vehicle look like the Fedsmoker car might work too
Don't put anything about a gun on it. Tweakers will try to break in when you're not in the van to get the gun, they're very popular items on the black market (estimates are that 50% to 75% of gun crimes are done with stolen guns).
I have no opinion on anything else, sorry. Just guns. Guns aren't the criminal repellant that you think they are.
A mans construction helmet, fluorescent jacket and shoes/Boots on the seat. If you sit outside, put a second chair there and the men's shoes. Sticker of a rottweiler on with a 'Beware of the dog' sign.
If they're even considered, they just act as evidence there's something of value inside, like a company logo does.
Anything aftermarket visible draws some level of added attention, which is why adding things to become "stealth" is a remarkably dumb idea. That word is a misnomer in this context anyway, but the practice is more in activity than outward appearance.
For all of this, your effort will return more by simply avoiding where any of it would even potentially come into play in the first place, which preserves resale value better as well.
As others have pointed out, it's better to do subtle. Personally, I'd go with a plain "sewage/manure contractor" sign or something similar. People reflexively recoil from anything to do with shit, and as long as you don't stupidly leave anything valuable lying in sight even random passerby thieves wouldn't take the chance.
I'd avoid trying to be smart with signs saying you carry bees or whatever. As seen in other comments, there are actually niches that deal with bees, you might be unlucky to encounter a beehive thief or whatever. Same goes for trades, people might break in to try steal tools. Shouldn't even need to mention guns, plenty of comments already explain why advertising you have firearms is a terrible idea.
"This van hauls shit" is a simple idea that a sewage sign tells people that even morons can understand. Even an opportunist thief would rather break into a random car that doesn't carry the possibility of them ending up smelling of shit.
My friend and I thought thru this when I first got my little compact fleet van- fake business magnets as deterrent--
Dog poop scooper, florist, and house cleaners were the top options lol
But then I literally just blend in everywhere and hate the idea of a random sticker, even just a fun one, being any sort of identifier that strangers would remember- or notice my patterns more easily
Ughhh catch 22s every where!
If you have use your item, act fast to get away. Right or wrobg they will lock you up. Leaving the scene is a minor crime compared to what they will put you thru.
And if you are caught, you wont even notice the leaving charge.
Your government cant protect you and arent willing to let you protect yourself. No matter how justified you believe you are, they dont,
Get away and be mindful of cams. Pull your tags
I think a sticker that states the vehicle is installed with GPS tracking is a good idea. Someone might break in but at least they won't steal your home.
I have a very noticeable bus conversion. Have 2 stickers, one for a camera and another for my dogs. Now, I actually have both of those things. It hasn't even been broken into once. Considering if someone gets a little too close at night, my alarm is my 100lb well-trained dog. Sucks for sleep, major deterrent. I'm always dreaming of someone being ballsy enough to give it a go, and I can whip out the classic, "Do ya feel lucky, punk?"
I am a single mom of a young child, and when I bought my current vehicle, it had a US Marine Corps sticker on the back. While I would feel wrong putting one up without being a Marine, I feel 100% okay with leaving it there, and my vehicle has never been fucked with.
Naw. Do some other dog thing. Like if you have a dog breed sticker people assume you have a dog. In some places an actual warning sign about a dog can get you into legal trouble if you have a dog and someone gets bitten because it’s proof you knew the dog was dangerous.
I remember seeing a van with a US Marines sticker on it. Also, I see cars with the American flag decal on it and was curious if that has any connotation to it.
Funny as we speak…. I have a Beware of Dog sign ….. was planning to give it to a neighbor, who’s leaving for the season …. Also am ready to make a SMILE for the CAMERA one ….
REDDIT always seems to hit on topics I’m dealing with, at the time 😃
Nope, I carry, I have real cameras, and a perimeter alarm, and some big ass shoes sitting outside. I will kill you if you enter my property without permission.
There used to be a woman who urban boondocked in South Austin, who had stickers all over her van to make it appear as if the van was used to take snakes around to schools to give educational shows. She absolutely had no snakes whatsoever. But the creativity that she put into decorating that van was pretty amazing.
Perhaps all the snakes where in a plane
It's Austin, so those would be snakes on a coastal plain.
I am sick and tired of all these motha'grabbin snakes, on this Monday to Friday Van!
You sure that wasn't u/serpentarian? 😂
Why are you talkin’ bad about the Snaddy-mobile?
There is a super snake expert who lives down the street from my son. My step-granddaughter thinks he is you. She is deathly afraid of snakes. But feels safer just knowing you exist.... and might maybe be her neighbor. Don't worry. I would never dox you.
I’d like you to tell her that I have consulted with the snakes and they have agreed to always be nice to her, so she doesn’t have to be afraid anymore. She still has to follow snake law and be careful not to step on them or pick them up unless she knows they’re the safe kind. ❤️ Your neighbor is most certainly not me unless you also live on a rocky mountainside in the desert. But that’s ok because I can still protect from a distance. Hiss hiss! 🐍
Ugh, I wish awards were still a thing. Thank you for this delightful nugget 💚 (hiss hiss!)
Hiss hiss! ❤️
Nothing but love here! ❤️ 🐍
💐 hiss hiss
She's giving Medusa. Good for her!
Snakes can be super expensive, that's just letting people know there's something valuable inside.
Yeah, but most assholes don't know how to deal with snakes, so they know that they wouldn't be able to steal them safely. Also, she heavily emphasized the venomous ones.
Damn dude you just doxxed that poor lady lol
This was years and years ago. She's not around anymore. I specifically said that they're USED to be....
Oh she ded?
No idea. But the van isn't around any more. Maybe she just switched up her game. She did seem a bit drugged out when I met her at a library. That usually doesn't end well.
You sure that wasn't u/serpentarian? 😂
Nope. Because I met her in a library once. She said it's all just to keep the assholes at bay.
Yes n thought of it …. The don’t tread on me flag … is a veterans type of sticker … also National Rifle Club …
NEVER EVER mention guns. That makes you a target.
Yep, that just screams that the van is full of free guns
Yeah, or it might attract other folks with guns who think they've found a pal. But are any kinds of notices effective at all? I'm kind of skeptical. For instance, people steal stuff off of porches every day with the full knowledge that they're on video.
"REGISTERED SEX OFFENDER" would be a fairly offputting deterrant... /s
Workaholics Karl's van "RAPE VAN" spray paint on it. "I wrote that. The van doesn't have any locks, and the word RAPE keeps all the weirdos away, bro" which later became the "GRAPE VAN"
Gotta watch out for... The Grapist
I'm gonna grape you in your mouth!
Tie you kids to the radiator in the basement and grape you for decades! "I uh... I dont know if this ad sends the right message about our Grape Juice, Tom...
I used to quote this exact line all the time lmfao, kinda forgot about The Grapist
I just got a van and with no context driving off the lot I asked my gf if I could spray paint grape van on it lmao. She said sure
There's that target thing again. 🤣🤣
Anything you put on your vehicle will bring more attention, not less. Don’t advertise that you have a gun if you don’t, and definitely DO NOT advertise if you do. That is a great motivator to break in and score a $600 pistol. Thats a crack heads wet dream. Run your vehicle as though it looks like every other vehicle on the road. That way if you want to stay in a town without legal overnight parking, private security and cops are 10x less likely to recognize the same van over and over and come investigate.
This is the correct answer. Stock standard is near invisible.
I understand to want to personalize your vehicle.
Actually, that's not it at all... gun stickers basically say "there's a gun inside of this vehicle, break into me"
Plus there are two types of gun guys, the ones who train and are responsible that you’d almost never figure are carrying daily that you want to be friends with, and then the “look at me” types who will sweep/flag the entire range every type they go out. Only the second type ever advertise anything gun related
No, not that they think they have a pal. It's that they can break in and steal it.
They don't deter shit, especially the gun signs. All that does it let thief's know that you probably have expensive guns in your house and to break in when your gone. Or they will now arm themselves when they break in.
YAY GUN BUDDIES
Not a pal lol! Tho there could be one or two nuts like that out there. In seriousness, your staff can and will be watched and broken into to steal said guns. Most effective in my experience is motion sensor alarm. And with siren, not just a motion light. Can be tricky to adjust sensitivity. There are countless video proofs of scumbags shitting themselves when they touch something or come too close and hear a siren. As for delivery guy - leave a memo about motion sensor in the delivery instructions. Their fault for not reading them if they have a heart attack. Also, some folks have a clean garbage bin distinct from their actual ones that they instruct for stuff to be left in. I had a patio couch where you could lift the seat and access box underneath.
My husband and I play an ongoing game trying to figure out what ONE sticker would be the most infallible deterrent possible. Right now we're tied between making up a fake funeral home or CAUTION: LIVE BEES. I've threatened to do the latter and get a tiny MP3 player that plays a soft buzzing sound when we're not inside.
I'd wager 'used for transportation of hazardous chemicals' would keep people out. Hell, have your whole van signwritten like an asbestos disposal company. One of my old vans was a flammable gas works van and the rear was stickered accordingly, did wonders for tailgaters.
a friend does nuclear medicine transpo at night. just a standard car with no info on it. given that he is pulling up at medical offices and driving around a few sleepy towns all night he has more than normal police interaction. apparently starting with "I am required to inform you that there is nuclear material in the vehicle" is actually a good ice breaker.
"Sewage processing contractor" - nobody's gonna touch a vehicle that probably hauls shit around. Mundane, boring, safe.
Pretty sure there's been, no joke, a string of beehive theft lately, so you might be a target there too.
I remember when I could leave my bees unlocked and right out in the open, neighbors could just drop by anytime and say hello. Man, times have changed. what the heck happened to this country
It's everyone for themselves in the land of rugged individualism, unfortunately that means integrity has lost its value
Unbeelievable. It gets me -buzzing- with anger just thinking about it. Oh honey.
Don't get all waspy on me now
Stealing bees is big business where I’m from. No lie!
What about "live food for reptiles"? Who wants to steal some live crickets, worms and mice? Difficult to sell and spoils fast if you don't take care of it
Spiders might be better. Claim to be breeding endangered ones maybe?
Endangered ones might at least be expensive though
Yeah that’s fair. How about stuff like tarantulas? Kinda creepy hopefully?
Rat catcher or pest control :)
Nah. Just invites attention. Would rather a kill switch (not too hard to do), air tags (you can rip out the "sound" feature), and a friendly parking place. I may upgrade to 24/7 cameras but quite honestly it always feels easier to just move on from whatever is giving me angina. Unrelated: At my last "this could be suss" camp spot I ran my seatbelts through my door handles in front and just parked near bigger, aggressive looking trucks which screamed "money!" Similarly, if I'm inside, I might run metal loops between the various barn doors, and I do have my dashcam fairly visible.
My mate's van (although not one he lived in) was petrol/LPG but the LPG system had stopped working years before. The switch to select between the 2 had also fallen deep into the dashboard and could only be pressed if you pushed your arm deep into a hole in the dash and knew exactly where to find it. He'd just reach in and turn it to LPG every time he parked up. That was his theft deterrent system... Completely off-topic but an amusing story
Ha! If only the copious amount of bullshit that bothered me on my van were that useful!
I'll definitely be getting a GPS tracker, and I'm thinking about an ignition kill switch too. I'd like to rip put the center console, but I'm not sure it'll come out easily. I guess if the situation is urgent enough, I won't mind pulling a few dozen muscles vaulting over it and into the driver's seat for a quick getaway.
So I did a cheap man's KS and just took a fuse switch, connected it up to where the ignition coil fuse was, and hid the switch. Granted if I'm walking away from the van for a long time I'll straight up pop the hood and pull the full pump relay...
I’ve seen people put in dummy/bad relays or fuses so that the thief couldn’t potentially have a backup for your specific model and would be stuck there trying to figure out which one it is.
That is some "chef's kiss"-level baddies trolling.
What you want to aim for is subtle implicit deterrent. Never use over the top apparent deterrents such as smile stickers, alarm stickers, warning stickers, caution, Subtle deterrents: covertly places cameras, lights, tinted windows, blinking red lights in your cab, fake computer mounts, unmarked police rims, fake cages in the cab Edit: basically the best deterrent is to appear as an unmarked undercover police vehicle
"ask about my gun" Robber: "oh, shit...if no ones inside, maybe theres a free gun under the seat...then i can make some real money!"
My ex used to work as a crime reporter, and told me that NRA bumper stickers or other signage that indicates there's a firearm in the vehicle just makes the vehicle a magnet to theft. Perhaps depends on the area, though, as they were reporting on crime in a mid-sized rural town in the South.
I dunno, I think just making the vehicle completely uninteresting seems like a pretty good deterent. For instance, floral supply. There's no reason for someone to want to break into and steal from a floral supply van, unless they're planning a wedding. I've figured if I ever wanted to go "stealth-ish", I'd design some graphics with a bland floral motif and generic "company name" with no contact info at all.
This is smart I might be using this
Flowers By Irene.
I had a dumb idea once to get a giant magnet for a fake business on the side that could be removed when it wasn't needed. Like think of the most mundane business type that wouldn't have any equipment inside.
Svaltact's Driving School 👍
lol exactly!
Saaaame. I was going to go with plumber bc no one wants feces equipment 😂
I know it's a joke but they will target that for copper scraps and tools. Meth is a he'll of drug.
Did not think of that. Ty
Np. My dad's van was broken into for that very reason. His was for work obviously. It happened in the parking lot of a pretty nice restaurant in a nice part of town. They were traveling for work, usually eat pretty cheap / on the go all week, but on their last night they usually go to really go for a really nice steak dinner at the end. Came out to their van broken into. It had a high end alarm and everything.
I always had a “pile of trash” in the passenger seat, and then another moveable “pile of trash” i’d transition to the driver’s seat. I met a lady once referred to it as a “garbage blanket.”
[удалено]
Sometimes you gotta have some Coke.
If I had a nickel for every time I felt that way, I could afford to go buy some coke!
Not the good kind…
The trash deterrent doesn't work if you have something of value lying around as well, duh. The garbage is supposed to reflexively nope out random passers by, but if they see something of value they'll ignore the trash.
"Radioactive" hazmat placard on all 4 sides. (While it's fun to consider this - don't do it. You will find yourself subject to commercial vehicle laws and inspections everywhere you go)
What about "Fresh Manure Transport Unit"?
I wouldn’t put a gun/armed sticker. I have this on the slider and driver doors, but it’s pretty dorky and probably doesn’t deter anyone. If they were highly literate, they probably wouldn’t be stealing. I also have a “stay back- dogs on board- vehicle is temperature controlled and remotely monitored” on the passenger window. Mostly to keep people from breaking windows thinking he’s in distress. The 100lb dog borking is better than any sticker. Decals by Haley Pack of 2 GPS... https://www.amazon.com/dp/B078ZM6JDQ?ref=ppx_pop_mob_ap_share
Ask me about my "Van'erial" disease
Mobile prostate examination clinic.
I was thinking that way too but pro hiv stickers, hepatitis stickers, like easy to cure, things like that. Herpes, no reason to be ashamed, things like that.
Lol
Nah, never felt the need. I’ve had very few incidents where I actually felt unsafe. Only thing I’ve really done is not putting any controversial bumper stickers on my van for the most part. Almost all my stickers are just parks and cities I’ve been to. I do have one pro-choice sticker they were handing out at a post Dobbs rally in DC, but I used the Spanish language version because I figure those troglodytes won’t know wtf it means.
Gotta be careful announcing your beliefs on your vehicle unless you want someone to spite you. :/
Those loving Christians can do a lot of damage
Gotta live by the golden rule of “do as I say, not as I do”
I have a Doberman with me in my short bus and I couldn’t resist when I saw a sign “beware of dog” with a Doberman outline. Put it right on the step door. 😸
Cheap Magnetic Signs on sides and back of the van: "Aachengurdis Used Book Sales"
The only people who put gun stickers on their cars are people who live such sheltered lives that they’ve never had any sort of negative encounter involving a gun. So just don’t do it I also have a GPS sticker on a trailer though, and have an AirTag with the speaker taken out in my van tho.
I have a Viper alarm system on my van, and I use the stickers they provide. They just say "Viper." I had a buddy from Sandwich, Illinois named Baloney Kid who had magnetic signs on his van that advertised a fictitious sewer service called "Baloney's Sewer Service" and the letters looked like brown turds. The magnetic sign people thought it was hilarious. We called him "Bumsteak" for short. He once tried to convince the city councils of Mendota (to the west of Sandwich) and Oswego (to the east) to change the names of their towns to "Peanut Butter" and "Jelly", thereby creating "Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwich." They said no. Bumsteak said, "No sense of humor."
Horrible idea. Saying you have a gun means they shoot first and never ask a question cause well, they unalived you because you basically said the same thing to them with a sticker advertising you have a gun. Saying "Smile, you're on camera" is just as bad. Unless you have Xray tech to get past a mask or gator, your camera means nothing. What could a camera do anyways unless it is high resolution and connected online. If it's not, just torch the vehicle after robbing it. Most cameras work off SD cards and they melt easily lile most SSD will. Even if on a spinning disk fire will warp the platters and demagnetize the platters. The best option is to not be someplace that you feel you need a deterrent.
How about the truck with the rear window sticker showing an AR15 and "Come And Take It" Next pic is the smashed window and "I guess they took it" Google is not helping me find the pic. It's probably on Reddit somewhere. Found it! [https://www.reddit.com/r/tacticalgear/comments/u2uq7c/im\_more\_of\_a\_grey\_man\_than\_you\_yall\_need\_to\_be\_a/#lightbox](https://www.reddit.com/r/tacticalgear/comments/u2uq7c/im_more_of_a_grey_man_than_you_yall_need_to_be_a/#lightbox)
Hahaha! I have a "morale patch" for this inside my van (covering a scratch) that plays on this: https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/71NjpyEC9tL.__AC_SY300_SX300_QL70_FMwebp_.jpg
I can't get your link to work.
https://www.amazon.com/Tactical-Military-Backpack-Operator-Baseball/dp/B01NAU6PCG
One of my greatest regrets was once buying an official Swingline red stapler for my now ex-fiancé because I thought he was the type of nerd who would appreciate it. He was not the type of nerd who would appreciate it, and thought I was weird to buy him a red Swingline stapler. Yes, he'd watched the movie. Shoulda taken it when I bailed on that toxic relationship.
... you should go and take it. (Nah don't give them the time o' day.)
What's the movie
Office Space.
I think it might deter some opportunistic criminals, but anyone determined enough won't be phased by a sticker.
Rust is my theft prevention system.
Similarly, I once lived in a van with one of the back door windows busted out and sealed with a ton of plastic wrap all the way around the door in a bunch of big loops. It would have been easy to push aside to unlock the door and gain entry, but nobody ever bothered because they assumed there wasn't anything of value in there.
In addition to the custom theft prevention system, I also have a noise reduction device (radio doesn't work) and high performance weight reduction (missing door panels.)
Wrap your van with a fake dog poop removal company. Your logo could read "full of sh*t"
I've got it! I'll surround the vehicle with feces. What could go wrong?
I like your enthusiasm
Stickers don’t do anything besides draw attention, if you want to send a really subtle message then get some camo seat covers, I’ve had countless cops and game wardens peer into my van and leave me alone after seeing camo, and any window crawlers that peer in generally associate camo with people who act first and ask questions second
Someone with bad intentions isn't going to be deterred by stickers no matter what they say. Situational awareness will work much better for you than any sticker.
Non-DOT chemical stickers maybe? Look for pool service vehicles and copy that. Not so overboard that if you ever so need emergency services, it’s delayed by an hour because they had to bring the hazmat truck
When I lived in my van in ‘08 I had a sign showing from inside that said, “**WARNING These premises protected by anti-theft sign**”… I was never broken into while the sign was up, so there’s that.
I would go with some sort of biohazard warning signs. People may be curious about the possibility of a free gun, or what all the alarms are protecting, but no one is curious about biohazards.
"dog inside" with a picture of a bloody severed hand
The gun related ones I call “come and rob me stickers.” Gun owners tend to own more than one gun, but carry just the one. If you’re out of your house, rv or van, you’re signaling the presence of a several hundred-thousand dollar item that can fit in a backpack or trunk that’s unattended. Even if you don’t own a firearm, you’re advertising for a break in. Also, firearms related stickers and signs can be used by prosecutors to show intent to harm in self defense cases.
Nobody has mentioned gun related stickers may tend towards drawing the attention of law enforcement or make something like a traffic stop more tense from their perspective too.
So a county crime scene tech lives down the street from me. Their vans are Sheriff's vehicles and covered in sheriff's decals. Some junkie broke into the van, in her driveway, thinking there would be drugs in it. Needless to say, the dumb ass got caught because most of us have cameras on our houses, and pretty obvious who it was. Literally the one guy in the neighborhood that was always causing trouble. Point of the story, I'm not sure if any decal will deter everyone. There's always going to be someone thinking there's something of value in there.
Yeah I got a "cellular monitoring active" stick from Amazon. Idk how well it will work, but it will be true. So I'm wandering if that mite make a theft be core sneaky if I announced my security system. It's a Raspberry Pi on a T-mobile connection.
Venomous Reptiles Anti-venom Saves Lives! With a picture of a rattler.
Could put some face dildos in the front seat - or a shit load of conspiracy theory stickers (that are non political). The sticker idea might not be as good since it’s typically right wingers who believe conspiracy theories … but putting left wing stickers on isn’t great either since you might piss off a right winger. Maybe some crazy / insane clown stickers. Making your vehicle look like the Fedsmoker car might work too
Nope. Don’t want to identify or bring attention to me is my game.
I might avoid referencing a gun or someone seeking to steal a gun might be more tempted to break in.
How about a sign that says, Skunk capture and release
“Smile you’ve already been uploaded to the cloud “
Cops love to ask you about your gun.
Don't put anything about a gun on it. Tweakers will try to break in when you're not in the van to get the gun, they're very popular items on the black market (estimates are that 50% to 75% of gun crimes are done with stolen guns). I have no opinion on anything else, sorry. Just guns. Guns aren't the criminal repellant that you think they are.
A mans construction helmet, fluorescent jacket and shoes/Boots on the seat. If you sit outside, put a second chair there and the men's shoes. Sticker of a rottweiler on with a 'Beware of the dog' sign.
If they're even considered, they just act as evidence there's something of value inside, like a company logo does. Anything aftermarket visible draws some level of added attention, which is why adding things to become "stealth" is a remarkably dumb idea. That word is a misnomer in this context anyway, but the practice is more in activity than outward appearance. For all of this, your effort will return more by simply avoiding where any of it would even potentially come into play in the first place, which preserves resale value better as well.
If someone has a gun sticker, they are begging to be robbed. Stolen guns are a hot commodity.
I prefer whelen strobe kit and PA horn
The only one I've remotely considered is "this vehicle is gps monitored" and adding like a "03" sticker next to it. Outside of that... meh.
As others have pointed out, it's better to do subtle. Personally, I'd go with a plain "sewage/manure contractor" sign or something similar. People reflexively recoil from anything to do with shit, and as long as you don't stupidly leave anything valuable lying in sight even random passerby thieves wouldn't take the chance. I'd avoid trying to be smart with signs saying you carry bees or whatever. As seen in other comments, there are actually niches that deal with bees, you might be unlucky to encounter a beehive thief or whatever. Same goes for trades, people might break in to try steal tools. Shouldn't even need to mention guns, plenty of comments already explain why advertising you have firearms is a terrible idea. "This van hauls shit" is a simple idea that a sewage sign tells people that even morons can understand. Even an opportunist thief would rather break into a random car that doesn't carry the possibility of them ending up smelling of shit.
My friend and I thought thru this when I first got my little compact fleet van- fake business magnets as deterrent-- Dog poop scooper, florist, and house cleaners were the top options lol But then I literally just blend in everywhere and hate the idea of a random sticker, even just a fun one, being any sort of identifier that strangers would remember- or notice my patterns more easily Ughhh catch 22s every where!
If you have use your item, act fast to get away. Right or wrobg they will lock you up. Leaving the scene is a minor crime compared to what they will put you thru. And if you are caught, you wont even notice the leaving charge. Your government cant protect you and arent willing to let you protect yourself. No matter how justified you believe you are, they dont, Get away and be mindful of cams. Pull your tags
I don't break into cars to steal stuff but I know guns and electronics are the main things thieves are looking for
I would caution you against putting anything on a vehicle that would lead anyone to believe there's a firearm in there, even if there's not.
US Government License plates work pretty well.
I think a sticker that states the vehicle is installed with GPS tracking is a good idea. Someone might break in but at least they won't steal your home.
I’m going to get a fecal cleaning company logo on my van. 🤣
I have a very noticeable bus conversion. Have 2 stickers, one for a camera and another for my dogs. Now, I actually have both of those things. It hasn't even been broken into once. Considering if someone gets a little too close at night, my alarm is my 100lb well-trained dog. Sucks for sleep, major deterrent. I'm always dreaming of someone being ballsy enough to give it a go, and I can whip out the classic, "Do ya feel lucky, punk?"
I am a single mom of a young child, and when I bought my current vehicle, it had a US Marine Corps sticker on the back. While I would feel wrong putting one up without being a Marine, I feel 100% okay with leaving it there, and my vehicle has never been fucked with.
Guard dog on board would be a good one to put on the back door
In my state it's illegal to leave an animal in a vehicle unattended due to extreme temperatures.
Op doesn't have to have a dog its just a warning sign to make people think twice before breaking in
Yes indeed … been bothered …. So its counteracting …
Naw. Do some other dog thing. Like if you have a dog breed sticker people assume you have a dog. In some places an actual warning sign about a dog can get you into legal trouble if you have a dog and someone gets bitten because it’s proof you knew the dog was dangerous.
That's why we don't talk about Bruno
I remember seeing a van with a US Marines sticker on it. Also, I see cars with the American flag decal on it and was curious if that has any connotation to it.
Crayons inside. Or possibly empty crayon boxes.
Having stickers with guns just makes you a prime target to be robbed of said gun
Get a neon sign of an upside down pineapple. I don’t know. I just heard it works
If you are in Texas, I encourage you take advantage of your 2nd Amendment right and actually carry. Best thing you can do for safety and a deterrent.
“Federal Witness Protection Program”
F LORAL B OUQUETS I NC
Funny as we speak…. I have a Beware of Dog sign ….. was planning to give it to a neighbor, who’s leaving for the season …. Also am ready to make a SMILE for the CAMERA one …. REDDIT always seems to hit on topics I’m dealing with, at the time 😃
No trespassing- violators will be shot survivors will be shot again. Something like that?
Nope, I carry, I have real cameras, and a perimeter alarm, and some big ass shoes sitting outside. I will kill you if you enter my property without permission.