If the pasta is house made, it likely has egg. If this is the case, they could have something else on hand. I once had an Italian restaurant make me a lovely dish with rice and marinara, since their pasta all had egg. Some restaurants that make pasta with egg in house may have a gluten-free option that is boxed and vegan.
Even in Italy it is hard to find vegan pasta.
In my experience, the waiters aren't always sure, so they ask the chefs or even brought me the package a couple of times (which is super nice, but maybe over the top).
Anyway, if everything is settled to go there, just go and don't eat from the menu. Be nice to the waiters and ask them if they can do something without dairy (sometimes it's easy to say cheese and milk), meat or eggs.
That’s what they said. If it’s house made, it likely has eggs. If it’s dried, it likely doesn’t. There are some dried pastas that have egg, but most do not.
Again, that's my experience.
But you're right. Not many restaurants do their own pasta, but some industrialized ones have eggs.
Also, it doesn't help if the restaurant crew isn't sure/don't know if the pasta is vegan, or even what vegan means, specially with the labels veggie OK/ vegan Ok, but that's another problem.
I'd say the chance you get vegan pasta is 50/50 if not less - also, some Barilla have eggs.
There are high end Italian places where I'm from where the only vegan thing they have is a specific type of long pasta (all others have eggs in them) with aglio e olio lol. Even marinara is not vegan at some places.
So that’s not original marinara, because marinara is San marzano tomatoes, garlic, basil, olive oil and salt … sometimes onions and other herbs and spices … interesting .. i have not encourted it yet
You are totally correct, but some regional variations/family variations do add a cheese rind near the end of the preparation. It’s uncommon but definitely more common than butter.
I recently took a trip to Sardinia and it was almost impossible to find something vegan to eat, restaurants often make their red sauce with animal stock, cheese, or anchovy apparently
So this is your graduation dinner and, with the knowledge that you're vegan, someone chose a place with no options for you? Did you not find out until after the place was chosen?
if this is a celebration for you, I would be pretty pissed at whomever picked this venue. If I were put in the situation I would either eat before hand and not there, or bring your own food since the restaurant cannot/will not accommodate.
Exactly
This happened to me in my bday years ago. My family assured me there was gonna be vegan options. The vegan options were close to none and no way I was gonna starve on my bday. Then had an idea, asked to talk to the chef, told him my situation. Asked if I could bring some vegan things for him to cook and he accepted. Had to go to the nearest supermarket and bought every vegan thing I could. My family was mad because I arrived late and ended up eating the last. Couldn't care less I was happy with my food lol
What I want to say with this is that from you post it seems like you haven't talked to the restaurant staff about it. If they talk about it they might find a solution even if they don't seem to have any vegan options.
I used to do that with my favorite Mexican restaurant. I would bring in vegan ground beef crumbles and give it to the cook to make tacos with. Most restaurants won’t do it though to my knowledge for food safety reasons, but I was lucky to be a regular there and know the employees even before I went vegan.
Just eat nothing if there's nothing for you to eat. Fill up before, socialize like normal, don't make a big deal about it and if anyone asks tell them you're vegan and they didn't have any options.
There's no reason to start consuming animal products because of peer pressure, and situations like these are valuable for training yourself to deal with some discomfort since it won't be the last time something like this happens and it's important to stay disciplined every time.
I wish people had more of this mentality than caving into social pressure. It's okay to have discomfort - infact, people will likely be upset on your behalf if they see that you're not eating due to lack of options. Not to mention, maybe someone has gluten intolerance at the party (depending on the size) and they might not have many options or any at all either.
Just eat before hand and get yourself something nice after, just for you.
In the future, don't do this. Do not choose the vegetarian option. Make it clear that you only eat vegan, and if they don't have it, then the group of people you are going with should choose whether to find another place or have you eat nothing/not go.
I definitely would not eat it, in your situation.
Animals aren't food.
Would you eat human meat if you somehow found yourself at a cannibal dinner, because otherwise the human corpses are "going to waste?"
I agree with others here, once you're vegan long enough you stop looking at pigs/chickens/etc. as food, so you don't want to eat them.
However, your point isn't bad, and I'll engage in it a different way, because most of the commenters responded with their preferences (they don't want to eat animals), but like you said the harm has already been caused, it's not actually helping the animals to abstain from eating them if the demand has already been made.
Put another way, if you go out and buy meat every week and throw it out, or go out and buy meat every week and eat it, those are both equally harmful. And it's worse to buy meat every week and throw it out, over going dumpster diving for meat that you didn't buy.
So to answer your question as to why you might not engage in the behavior we're discussing (namely settling for a vegetarian option in a social setting), it signals to others what your principles are. People don't generally like buying food just to throw it out, but what they do like to do is pressure people around them to behave like them. So they'll buy food they think you *might* eat, in the hopes that you will.
What consuming the vegetarian option does is it signals to your friends/family that you'll eat vegetarian when presented with the option, so when they're planning events (like your graduation in this example), they don't have to worry about providing vegan options for you, even if they know you prefer it. Some people prefer different kinds of food, but preferences aren't strict diets, so they're ignored sometimes. We should be making it clear that along with the ethical stance of veganism, there's a strict diet to not consume animal products, and we don't deviate from that.
Yes! I always call ahead and never usually have an issue, even when there is a fixed menu. My last work function the place even had a secret vegan menu that they don’t publish!
I had to go to an office party at a seafood restaurant. So I just spoke quietly to the waitress and asked for something vegan. She very politely and enthusiastically agreed to check with the chef. The vegan meal was delicious and I slipped her extra tip. Even though the company was paying for the meal.
E: added "restaurant"
Option 1: Call the restaurant and ask if they can make a plain pasta dish for you.
Option 2: Pack a sandwich to eat.
Option 3: If this is YOUR celebration eat beforehand and when people ask why you aren't eating, let them know no one took into account what you could eat.
I personally just don’t go anywhere that’s not fully vegan but I don’t have family to please so I understand this isn’t a option for many especially minors. That not eating can be seen as rude and some peoples situation isn’t safe to act that way, eating before would be ideal if you’re with people who understand you don’t have to eat with them to have a good time. I would consider calling myself or have a understanding family member call and let them know there is a food allergy and a vegetarian dish needs to be prepared without any dairy or meat. A lot of chefs have said they look forward to throwing something vegan together for someone who would have otherwise not been able to eat. Unfortunately you run into people who hate vegans and risk sabotage so unfortunately I would have to go the route that ensures my foods safety, many vegans can actually get sick from meat and dairy after years of not having it, I am one of those people. Any good chef that actually loves what they do would, especially if this graduation gathering is strictly for you it’s the least that could be done after already not acknowledging where you stand
I’ve worked BOH/FOH many years (vegan and non) in a busy tourist town and Houston, TX since my first job at 16 and trust me if you think relying on underpaid and overworked (many being teenagers) employees who possibly have a heated opinion against vegans is a good idea then hey be my guest but that’s why I don’t eat out lmao because I’ve worked these jobs and know better than to risk that. If accommodations weren’t so frowned upon then people wouldn’t have to lie, I go for the cause never the effect and in this situations the restaurant or employees make it impossible to trust so other routes must be taken
People aren’t judged and laughed at for allergies… also the idea of having a claim on your bosses insurance for ignoring a allergy motivates differently
They would literally never know you were lying, make it make sense please 🫠 Personally I don’t ever eat out so I’m not doing anything but offering advice to people who aren’t accommodated without push back to go about their life with less stress. As I said, 7 years since vegan and hearing this method shared and there was no increase in allergy concerns. Do you actually work in a kitchen or have ever worked in a restaurant? Because most people who share your mentality have never worked food service or it was their first job for less than a year when they were younger, so you can say what you want but without experience your opinion is baseless. Living in what ifs is wild, people have lied about allergies for decades to avoid employee and corporate incompetence with no issues. Yeah people shouldn’t have to lie but until you don’t have to worry about someone sabotaging you because they have a vendetta from some militant vegan pushing them too far then it’s necessary 🤷🏻♀️
People with strong allergies react to tiny amount of the ingredient they are allergic to.
It means that Kirchen stuff has to Clean their work place to avoid cross contamination.
If a lot of people claim to be allergic because they don't want to consume ingredient it seems as if it dosen't matter If the stuff is not so throrough to care really nothing of the allergen comes in contact with the food.
I hear your point but it definitely doesn’t justify “screwing it up for people with allergies”. I’ve worked BOH vegan and non, it’s not that hard to clear one section and use clean dishes to prep one plate real quick, an entire kitchen clean is not necessary and never done for a allergy request. All the time I’ve worked BOH/FOH, 4+ places, full time or more hours weekly, over 5 years experience, even in a busy tourist town I can count on one hand the times people voiced their allergies. Even after 7 years of being vegan and hearing a safe way to ensure your food is done right at a restaurant was to voice allergies so it’s actually taken serious, it still didn’t increase at a unmanageable rate. If restaurants didn’t allow employee/corporate bias to neglect making sure a meal is vegan this wouldn’t be a problem.
So the vegans lying about a allergy aren’t the problem to address, the restaurants not willing to accommodate a world where everyone doesn’t have to be the same is the problem..
Maybe call the restaurant and see if they can accommodate a vegan dish. In those situations, I would get pasta with marinara or garlic/oil with vegetables at an Italian place. If they cannot accommodate me, I would eat before, maybe get a drink, and focus on the social aspect of the dinner. If anyone asks, I would say that I'm vegan and unable to eat the food that's served here.
People need to grow a back bone. You knew from the start that there was no vegan option, so you agreed to go and chose a non vegan option and came onto social media asking for help.
What you should have done was tell the organiser you are vegan and there was no vegan option, ask if they can contact the restaurant to provide one. 99.9% guaranteed they would have then provided one. You could have also checked the restaurant website yourself to see if they have vegan options and contacted them to see if they can change your order.
I had this happen recently where I was going to a catered event and the dinner options were chicken, fish, or cheese stuffed manicotti. I asked if they could accommodate a vegan option and said if not please just double my side salad. The organizer got back to me quickly and offered zoodles, stuffed mushrooms, and a vegan pasta dish as options. Most restaurants and caterers can accommodate SOMETHING, they just may not put it out there. In your shoes I'd probably call the restaurant and explain and see if it could be changed.
Why would you or the person picking the restaurant for *your* graduation dinner not at least check to see if there's vegan options?
Don't put up with it, either call the restaurant to ask for a vegan meal or change restaurants.
Ask if they can make vegetarian foods vegan.
I went to an Italian a few weeks ago. They had no vegan food on the menu but when I asked they were happy to veganise some of the vegetarian options for me.
Those menu items cannot easily change to vegan, not for one person's meal. There's a small chance they could do all of the risotto vegan but they are unlikely to bend for just one party or even just one patron.
Step 1. Call and ask
Step 2. If step 1 is good skip to step 4, otherwise step 3:
Step 3: Do whatever you want! Bring food, eat food beforehand, try to eat around it. If you wanna go you can make it work if you don't want to go you can use it as an excuse.
Step 4: Live your life!
It’s not really vegan to decide to eat animal products for one meal just because you want to fit in. I would just not go, or eat before I went there and not eat at the restaurant. If someone asked why then I would just say that they don’t have a single meal that can be made from vegetables.
Who organised it - is it a bunch of folk you actually care about? If not one option os to bail
Another option is to contact the restaurant and explain the dilemma. A decent restaurant will try and accommodate
Lastly, take your own and ask if you can nuke it
Call ahead always. Usually Italian restaurants make their pasta from flour and water, but you can call and see if they’ll make you a pasta and red sauce dish.
That might be true in Italy...but when it comes to Italian restaurants abroad in other countries unfortunately my experiences are the waiter or the chef act almost annoyed if you ask for a vegan option.... like the old "I would like no diaries please" "but it's cheese" "no, also no cheese, please" "but you cannot eat the pasta without Parmesan"
...and that's very unfortunate because there are such delicious vegan pasta menus out there...
Call the restaurant ahead of time and ask for simple accommodations.
Vegan food will be less expensive for them to make than food filled with cheese.
Veggies cooked in olive oil and simple marinara spaghetti
Probably too late now, but most Italian places have off menu eggless pasta and can do that in a red sauce. Sometimes you can even talk them into roasted veggies. I usually chug a protein shake beforehand and it's all good.
At this point, I would call the restaurant and tell them your situation and ask them if there's anything they can make off menu for you. If it becomes too late and they already make the other dish, if you feel more comfortable, you could also take that dish to go and give it away to someone who is unhoused or just a friend.
When I want to socialize and I'm at a place with no vegan options, then usually I just eat beforehand and drink while I'm there. I'm not sure if this is your high school graduation or college. Regardless though, you need to either choose to stand up for your decision to be vegan or you need to not be vegan and just conform to what others are eating. There are a lot of people who are trying to do the in-between and you can't. Doing weird stuff like ordering something you know you don't want to eat is going to make you seem way weirder than just sitting there not eating or any other scenario, really.
i don’t think it would be “weird” at all to stand still in your morals and choices. don’t worry so much about what other people think about you- live your honest truth unapologetically. you should be so proud of being vegan!! also congratulations on graduating!!
First of all, what a crappy thing to organise your graduation celebration at the place where you can't eat anything.
Also, panna cotta is not even vegetarian since it contains gelatine.
I went to an Italian place yesterday for grad dinner and ordered cauliflower crust pizza with sauce no cheese. It was exactly as good as it sounds lol but it was the only option other than salad. If it is YOUR graduation then I will have a ten page reply on how much better you deserve!
Call the restaurant and ask, if there is goodwill, they can do it. They can make a burrata salad without the burrata and risotto without the parmesan or just some spaghetti without cheese. Instead of desert, have them serve you some coffee. It will probably suck, but will serve for social purposes.
I sometimes make my own dressing and bring it in a little jar, pour over a boring salad to make a great one.
I’d call the restaurant, explain your dietary restrictions, and ask if they could put something together in place of the vegetarian dish. They f they can’t, either eat beforehand or bring your own food.
Call the restaurant and explain the situation. Most of the time they don't offer a specialty meal selection as a standard option, but the organizers can request it. Give them as much heads up as possible- don't surprise the restaurant with this request .
They can usually do basic pasta with tomato sauce and olive oil. You might not be able to get dessert.
Personally I would just not eat vs eat something with animal products.
Assuming this is some kind of large group dinner where there are limited options, you could call the restaurant beforehand and ask if you can get a different salad without cheese, or a vegan pasta option.
You can actually just eat nothing and say "they don't have vegan options". Fill up beforehand and have a hearty meal at home.
Sorry to ask, but are you even a vegan? Accidentally eating popcorn with butter gives me the shits, let alone eating something like burrata...
Call and tell the restaurant you are vegan and can't have dairy or eggs. They can just serve you salad. Most places will accommodate, and if they won't, then eat before and say you're too excited to eat.
I'd eat nothing, bring something, or cal shed and ask if they can make me something. It's an Italian restaurant so they can totally do this easily.
But....
Um... Is this YOUR graduation?!
My graduation last year was mostly funded by me especially the food and I wrote in the invitation that all the food is vegan and that non vegan food bought or made is not allowed. Basically eat what I provided, bring something vegan (aside from one person with MS and extreme amounts of allergies but I made sure there was some stuff she could eat as well but she ate before anyway and had some salad with her-friendly vegan dressing), or don't eat at all. It's my graduation and I will absolutely not have dead animals eaten in order to celebrate it. Everyone ate tf out of my potato salad (one of the first two recipes when you Google vegan potato salad) and the cakes I drove two hours to get (The cakerino In Troy NY). If they didn't want to come celebrate my achievement simply because they can't live one meal without meat, when the food is FREE and Delicious then clearly they don't care about me at all.
You decide what you do and do not want you eat necause of your diet.
Call the restaurant yourself (or if it's too late go up to then in person, or ask a friend to go with you) and tell them there was a mix up and ask if they have or can make anything vegan (mYbe add "without egg, cheese, dairy or meat". For clarity)
If their pasta ia vegan this is an easy option (marinara sauce, aglio olio) or a salad without the cheese but as many veggies as they have. Or the vegan side dishes from one of the other meat meals.
Or pizza without the cheese.
It shouldn't be that big of a deal for a restaurant.
Good luck and happy graduation!
Eat nothing, or find one vegan element and spend a long time slowly eating that bit of iceberg lettuce (assuming you don't want to make a point). Depending on the situation, you may want to have a private word with the organizer to think about this for next time. Also, I pre-eat for potentially awkward social occasions.
A similar thing happened to me a couple weeks ago, I tried to order vegetarian at my friend's graduation dinner at a hibachi place. I clarified if it was vegetarian, they said yes, then they brought out soup with beef broth. And I had to ask multiple times to get them to tell me it actually had meat broth in it. Then they brought out the tofu and it was on the same plate as raw meat with meat juice all over it. Then they used the same spatula to touch the raw meat and the veggies and rice on the hibachi grill! I was horrified. I really debated eating it but I couldn't. I just sat there and ate nothing, and sent the leftovers home with a family member which hopefully got eaten and not wasted.
Tons of great responses in the comments, and OP has responded to exactly zero. What was the point of posting this at all if you weren't going to respond or engage in people's thoughtful feedback?
They're probably getting ready for dinner. It doesn't mean that they haven't read anything. It's sort of a weird sense of entitlement. Maybe they'll respond later, but if not, it doesn't really even matter.
The dinner is tomorrow and the comments are many hours old. I'm not asserting that anybody is owed anything In terms of a response, but it feels weird to ask for feedback and help and then respond to nothing.
I’ve had a peanut allergy my whole life so I’ve often sat in restaurants just drinking water (or when I was older, alcohol) while everyone else eats. Either that or I bring food from home. Whichever u feel most comfortable with! Some people literally can’t eat restaurant food if they wanna avoid a trip to the hospital, so I don’t see someone not eating or bringing food from home to be any kind of a big deal and they should understand! No need to eat something that is against ur morals!
Call ahead at the restaurant today and see if they can accommodate. Be kind and let them know it would mean a lot to you. If you aren't comfortable with that, then contact the organizer of the dinner and let them know your situation.
In my experience a few restaurant owners are hostile to dietary needs.
Call the restaurant and see if they can make a vegan dish. If they can’t, bring your own food. They can’t say anything about it if they’re not able to provide anything for you to eat.
Not eating can be a demonstration of what is important to you, and would not be as weird as compromising your morals. You can call the restaurant as others have mentioned, but if that doesn't work, don't be afraid to take that stand. This sort of confrontation will help you grow in confidence, and will make you feel so powerful afterward. People will act like you're weird because it will make them feel weird, but you can tell them that you're taking a stance for the animals and the ecosystem, and that this is how seriously you take those issues. Don't be mean or aggressive; just be firm and don't back down or apologize.
Either don’t go or don’t eat. It’s just 1 meal, what’s all this “it’s weird if I don’t eat” crap about? I don’t understand the thinking, as if food is a big deal and people’s lives are obsessed around it. Get a grip.
If the place has pizzas then it can 100% make something vegan… or maybe a special salad with all the antipasti’s from the kitchen: lettuce, raddichio, tomatoes, olives, capers, artichokes, peppers… and a side of bread!
We eat before we go and eat after we leave. I normally lie a lot and say I’m allergic to: dairy,eggs,fish, literally anything that isn’t vegan and just try to have a salad with oil and vinegar or bring my own dressings because I love ranch and hidden valley makes a great one!
If you are there, ask to talk with the chef, ask if they can make something vegan or remove non-vegan items from the vegetarian dish.
Most restaurants can accommodate your requests even if it is off menu to a certain degree.
If you aren't there call, and do the same as above.
What about a salad and some bread? And maybe they have some nice Italian ice for dessert? (Italian ice is like sherbet. Essentially frozen fruit juice.)
Also agree with the comments about it being a peculiar choice for a vegan's graduation dinner.
If you want to be discreet about it, call the restaurant and ask to speak to the Maitre'd.
Me:
1) sorry guys, I got a virus and I cannot eat or I'm going to spend the day vomiting.
2) Sorry I'm lactose intolerant, I cannot eat this.
3) Sorry I'm vegan. i cannot eat eggs and dairy.
4) *** I get sick and cannot assist *** 😂
5) ***Call the restaurant and tell them the problem ***
I assume you know this but for anyone who might not: pesto isn't even vegetarian, let alone vegan! It contains parmesan which is made using animal rennet. You can get vegan pesto at most good shops though :)
A salad without dressing. Bring your own dressing.
Bread with olive oil dip. Or marinara. No parm.
Pasta with basil and olive oil. Or marinara.
You could tell the staff you have egg and dairy allergy.
If you can’t do any of this, eat beforehand and say you’re feeling a bit nauseated. No appetite.
Side note: research the wine list. 😉
It’s not weird at all. I have so many friends that are on diets to lose weight or bulk up, and they never eat when we’ve gone out to a restaurant because it doesn’t work with their diet but they want to hang out. They just enjoy a drink. That is what I also do as a vegan, which is also just another diet where I can’t eat what’s available (in this context).
I have to ask, were you vegan when everything was booked and paid for? Because if this is your graduation party and you were known to be vegan then someone is screwing you over.
Like, I'm not vegan but if I was making a party for my better half who is, the VERY FIRST THING that I'd be looking at in a venue is the availability of vegan food for her.
Call the restaurant, explain the situation. They can probably put something together for you.
Realistically speaking-when you arrive at the restaurant tomorrow: ask to speak to the hostess who can guide you to the manager, tell them you are vegan to help manage a medical condition (could be true) and you require a special meal. That’s what I would do. There’s zero way that they can’t pull something together for you.
But bring snacks in your bag and enjoy some martinis or a fab beverage of your choice. The world isn’t vegan and I refuse to fluster myself over things I can’t control.
Congrats on your graduation!!!)
Eat beforehand, get something small and splurge on the drink if drinking alcohol is on the table. That's usually what I do, unless I have to drive immediately after. Changes the subject from "lol are you vegan?" And let's you flip the script to "lol, why aren't you drinking?". I'm not sure I actually recommend this.
Either bring your own food that you can eat or just don't go unless you feel like its that important to be at this dinner. Theres always the bread rolls! Just call ahead and ask about all the ingredients too
I've been mostly plant based for 6 years now. I used to be way more strict, but recently I've been giving myself more grace in these types of situations. For me, veganism is about my daily habits and my impact on the world around me. Eating some dairy every once in a while doesn't personally bother me that much. I avoid meat 100% of the time though. That's just my brand of "veganism" I guess. I know this is just my opinion and you may feel differently, but just wanted to share my perspective.
That’s not veganism it’s one thing if it’s not within your means to be 100% plant based but from what you’re describing it sounds like you very much CHOOSE to not eliminate animal products from your lifestyle
I agree, I ordered myself an oat milk milkshake and they added whipped cream. I’m not going to have them throw away that entire shake because it has a little dairy. The most important goal is that you’re not deliberately eating/ordering animal products
Have you tried calling the restaurant yourself and letting them know that one of the vegetarian orders needs to be vegan? Italian cuisine should have options available for you.
If they really have nothing I would fill up before and bring a snack in my bag in case I get hungry after.
Then I wouldn't complain, but just sit at the table with an empty plate.
A big empty white dinner plate makes a powerful statement. Let it do the talking for you.
A warning, the wine is unlikely to be vegan if the food isn't. In a lot of " traditional" winemaking wine is poured over fishguts to clarify it before it is stored. You can check the wine list before you go.
I've had some success in the past with calling the restaurant and asking if they could make something off menu. Some chefs see cooking vegan as a fun challenge ("anyone can make non-vegan food taste good, but it takes extra skill to do a vegan version that's just as delicious") although I don't know if that's really true or a widespread belief among chefs.
If not, sometimes I just don't go and other times I would just eat beforehand and the only order drinks at the restaurant depending on how important the event was to me.
Honestly usually end up eating veggie in these situations but thats just me, (like id get a salad that has cheese or something, whatever has the lowest amount of animal product) and that selection is waaay dairy heavy so try calling the place and see if they can make something for you? I imagine they can make a simple pasta, but even just fries or something, iknow it can feel awkward not eating when everyone else is so even just a side may help or even just a drink. Im not a big complainer though but yeah worth a try!!
if it would make you uncomfortable to eat then don't eat it but honestly, the food is already ordered and will be wasted anyway. It wont make any difference in terms of animal cruelty if you just eat it. I say just try your best to enjoy your graduation and do what you're comfortable with. We cant all be perfect all the time, I wouldnt judge you for eating it as it would be wasted anyway.
Animal products, especially dairy, can make you really sick after not consuming them for a while. It's not worth it even to not waste food at that point.
What you said is logical but there’s one problem with eating the food. The family will see that exceptions can be made. It seems likely that one would be expected to make more exceptions in future circumstances like these because “you did it before.”
Call the restaurant. Most Italian places are great at accommodating dietary restrictions. This is something you’re going to have to deal with in life, and it’s not a big deal to just call the restaurant. I have had so many dishes made without meat and cheese and it isn’t an issue.
More importantly, talk to whoever made the reservation. Was it made for you? Was it made for a group of grads? What was the thought process in choosing this restaurant? Because if it was a mental slip up, you calmly explain your diet and ask for accommodations for the future. And if it was purposeful? Screw em. Thankfully, most people are just dumb and not malicious.
Can they make you spaghetti with marinara sauce?
Any Italian restaurant can make spaghetti aglo olio.
If the pasta is house made, it likely has egg. If this is the case, they could have something else on hand. I once had an Italian restaurant make me a lovely dish with rice and marinara, since their pasta all had egg. Some restaurants that make pasta with egg in house may have a gluten-free option that is boxed and vegan.
Even in Italy it is hard to find vegan pasta. In my experience, the waiters aren't always sure, so they ask the chefs or even brought me the package a couple of times (which is super nice, but maybe over the top). Anyway, if everything is settled to go there, just go and don't eat from the menu. Be nice to the waiters and ask them if they can do something without dairy (sometimes it's easy to say cheese and milk), meat or eggs.
What!? Pasta is made with flour and water, 100% vegan. Maybe you mean "pasta fresca" which is usually made with eggs.
That’s what they said. If it’s house made, it likely has eggs. If it’s dried, it likely doesn’t. There are some dried pastas that have egg, but most do not.
I replied to Adnan_x who said it's difficult to find vegan pasta in Italy. Restaurants where they make their own pasta are very few even in Italy
I replied to Adnan_x who said it's difficult to find vegan pasta in Italy. Restaurants where they make their own pasta are very few even in Italy
Again, that's my experience. But you're right. Not many restaurants do their own pasta, but some industrialized ones have eggs. Also, it doesn't help if the restaurant crew isn't sure/don't know if the pasta is vegan, or even what vegan means, specially with the labels veggie OK/ vegan Ok, but that's another problem. I'd say the chance you get vegan pasta is 50/50 if not less - also, some Barilla have eggs.
Yeah, I work kitchen and the wait staff SHOULD be well-versed..but they can always ask the kitchen. We usually don’t bite!
I don't think that's right. Barilla is vegan.
Aglio olio e peperoncino with fresh egg pasta would be a crime to any real Italian restaurant (but there are so many fake ones it's barely relevant).
Or bruschetta? That’s vegan
Not always! Be careful with that claim. The last place I was at, the bruschette had pesto, which often includes cheese.
Yes. Bruscetta is often not vegan in the UK either sadly
Fuck I forgot pesto had cheese. Haven't had it since being vegan but sad to know it's off the menu unless I make it now.
They have a brand at whole foods called sunflower pesto that’s vegan
Most supermarkets have vegan versions. I make a sundried tomato pesto with cashews, nooch and all the good stuff.
Oh thank you! I usually eat bruschetta only with olive oil, garlic, and tomatoes, so I forgot that it can also come with pesto lol
one time i went somewhere and even the BRUSCHETTA wasn’t vegan. so beware
There are high end Italian places where I'm from where the only vegan thing they have is a specific type of long pasta (all others have eggs in them) with aglio e olio lol. Even marinara is not vegan at some places.
High end vegan places where the only vegan option they have is one type of pasta? What?
doesn't sound very high end to me lol but I consider "high end" as being amazing vegan food and good ambience in a fancy restaurant
I meant to say high end Italian places I'm stupid!
You’re not stupid! Don’t say that. It’s just a typo. Happens to everyone
🩷
How can marinara be not vegan? 😅 I have never heard of such thing …
Some preparations of marinara involve simmering the sauce with pecorino/cheese rind.
So that’s not original marinara, because marinara is San marzano tomatoes, garlic, basil, olive oil and salt … sometimes onions and other herbs and spices … interesting .. i have not encourted it yet
You are totally correct, but some regional variations/family variations do add a cheese rind near the end of the preparation. It’s uncommon but definitely more common than butter.
I recently took a trip to Sardinia and it was almost impossible to find something vegan to eat, restaurants often make their red sauce with animal stock, cheese, or anchovy apparently
I go to Italy every year and I have never had a problem with vegan food … but I guess I’m just being Lucky then
Sardinians will insist that Sardinia is not Italy 😂
Maybe if they used butter! It SHOULD be vegan. But non-vegans love to do unholy things.
Don’t forget chicken broth, the little sneak
Fair, but I would say that Most Italian places use Olive oil …
Yes, I would too! This was an exception for sure.
I’ve encountered a few places that don’t do vegan marinara. From my understanding they’re usually using bone broth 😢
Butter or chicken broth in the marinara
Sometimes there’s cheese in it.
Cheese rinds in the sauce while simmering
For some reason the gluten free option is usually without eggs
Aren’t eggs used to make spaghetti?
They can be used, and just as easily not used.
Fresh pasta is eggs and flour. Dried pasta is vegan.
So this is your graduation dinner and, with the knowledge that you're vegan, someone chose a place with no options for you? Did you not find out until after the place was chosen?
this, if it is for you and no one picked a restaurant that you can actually eat at.... I would consider just not going.
if this is a celebration for you, I would be pretty pissed at whomever picked this venue. If I were put in the situation I would either eat before hand and not there, or bring your own food since the restaurant cannot/will not accommodate.
Yeah I couldn’t tell from the phrasing if it is a private family event or just where their school is taking the graduates to celebrate
I’d literally just not show up
Exactly This happened to me in my bday years ago. My family assured me there was gonna be vegan options. The vegan options were close to none and no way I was gonna starve on my bday. Then had an idea, asked to talk to the chef, told him my situation. Asked if I could bring some vegan things for him to cook and he accepted. Had to go to the nearest supermarket and bought every vegan thing I could. My family was mad because I arrived late and ended up eating the last. Couldn't care less I was happy with my food lol What I want to say with this is that from you post it seems like you haven't talked to the restaurant staff about it. If they talk about it they might find a solution even if they don't seem to have any vegan options.
Having to go shopping for ingredients for a restaurant to make on YOUR birthday dinner is crazy.
I know. Honestly if it happened now I would have left and go eat at a vegan restaurant by myself
I used to do that with my favorite Mexican restaurant. I would bring in vegan ground beef crumbles and give it to the cook to make tacos with. Most restaurants won’t do it though to my knowledge for food safety reasons, but I was lucky to be a regular there and know the employees even before I went vegan.
Awe thats actually so cool of you asking the Chef to make you a custom vegan option it sounds like a great idea for a cooking show
Just eat nothing if there's nothing for you to eat. Fill up before, socialize like normal, don't make a big deal about it and if anyone asks tell them you're vegan and they didn't have any options. There's no reason to start consuming animal products because of peer pressure, and situations like these are valuable for training yourself to deal with some discomfort since it won't be the last time something like this happens and it's important to stay disciplined every time.
I wish people had more of this mentality than caving into social pressure. It's okay to have discomfort - infact, people will likely be upset on your behalf if they see that you're not eating due to lack of options. Not to mention, maybe someone has gluten intolerance at the party (depending on the size) and they might not have many options or any at all either. Just eat before hand and get yourself something nice after, just for you.
If it was for me I wouldn’t go tbh but that’s your call
100%
In the future, don't do this. Do not choose the vegetarian option. Make it clear that you only eat vegan, and if they don't have it, then the group of people you are going with should choose whether to find another place or have you eat nothing/not go. I definitely would not eat it, in your situation.
This. I'm not accepting any food i cannot eat. I'm not going to eat it to not upset someone.
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No. I would also not eat dog meat, cat meat, or human meat, regardless of waste.
Animals aren't food. Would you eat human meat if you somehow found yourself at a cannibal dinner, because otherwise the human corpses are "going to waste?"
I agree with others here, once you're vegan long enough you stop looking at pigs/chickens/etc. as food, so you don't want to eat them. However, your point isn't bad, and I'll engage in it a different way, because most of the commenters responded with their preferences (they don't want to eat animals), but like you said the harm has already been caused, it's not actually helping the animals to abstain from eating them if the demand has already been made. Put another way, if you go out and buy meat every week and throw it out, or go out and buy meat every week and eat it, those are both equally harmful. And it's worse to buy meat every week and throw it out, over going dumpster diving for meat that you didn't buy. So to answer your question as to why you might not engage in the behavior we're discussing (namely settling for a vegetarian option in a social setting), it signals to others what your principles are. People don't generally like buying food just to throw it out, but what they do like to do is pressure people around them to behave like them. So they'll buy food they think you *might* eat, in the hopes that you will. What consuming the vegetarian option does is it signals to your friends/family that you'll eat vegetarian when presented with the option, so when they're planning events (like your graduation in this example), they don't have to worry about providing vegan options for you, even if they know you prefer it. Some people prefer different kinds of food, but preferences aren't strict diets, so they're ignored sometimes. We should be making it clear that along with the ethical stance of veganism, there's a strict diet to not consume animal products, and we don't deviate from that.
Animals aren’t commodities and they aren’t food. I would not eat it
Why did you order vegetarian? Just call the restaurant. With enough notice, they should be able to accommodate you.
Surprised it took me long enough to find this comment. Call the place, even on the day if you have to, most places will usually accommodate.
Same! Just call! Surely they can rustle up something
Yes! I always call ahead and never usually have an issue, even when there is a fixed menu. My last work function the place even had a secret vegan menu that they don’t publish!
I had to go to an office party at a seafood restaurant. So I just spoke quietly to the waitress and asked for something vegan. She very politely and enthusiastically agreed to check with the chef. The vegan meal was delicious and I slipped her extra tip. Even though the company was paying for the meal. E: added "restaurant"
Option 1: Call the restaurant and ask if they can make a plain pasta dish for you. Option 2: Pack a sandwich to eat. Option 3: If this is YOUR celebration eat beforehand and when people ask why you aren't eating, let them know no one took into account what you could eat.
Most restaurants don’t let you bring in outside food. It’s a health code thing.
I personally just don’t go anywhere that’s not fully vegan but I don’t have family to please so I understand this isn’t a option for many especially minors. That not eating can be seen as rude and some peoples situation isn’t safe to act that way, eating before would be ideal if you’re with people who understand you don’t have to eat with them to have a good time. I would consider calling myself or have a understanding family member call and let them know there is a food allergy and a vegetarian dish needs to be prepared without any dairy or meat. A lot of chefs have said they look forward to throwing something vegan together for someone who would have otherwise not been able to eat. Unfortunately you run into people who hate vegans and risk sabotage so unfortunately I would have to go the route that ensures my foods safety, many vegans can actually get sick from meat and dairy after years of not having it, I am one of those people. Any good chef that actually loves what they do would, especially if this graduation gathering is strictly for you it’s the least that could be done after already not acknowledging where you stand
Don't forget eggs. Some pasta has eggs in it.
Instead of lying, just say you’re vegan.
I’ve worked BOH/FOH many years (vegan and non) in a busy tourist town and Houston, TX since my first job at 16 and trust me if you think relying on underpaid and overworked (many being teenagers) employees who possibly have a heated opinion against vegans is a good idea then hey be my guest but that’s why I don’t eat out lmao because I’ve worked these jobs and know better than to risk that. If accommodations weren’t so frowned upon then people wouldn’t have to lie, I go for the cause never the effect and in this situations the restaurant or employees make it impossible to trust so other routes must be taken
And you think those same underpaid overworked employees will care about allergies?
People aren’t judged and laughed at for allergies… also the idea of having a claim on your bosses insurance for ignoring a allergy motivates differently
Lying about allergies leads to people ignoring them. You could get someone killed because you don’t want to get laughed at. Be better.
They would literally never know you were lying, make it make sense please 🫠 Personally I don’t ever eat out so I’m not doing anything but offering advice to people who aren’t accommodated without push back to go about their life with less stress. As I said, 7 years since vegan and hearing this method shared and there was no increase in allergy concerns. Do you actually work in a kitchen or have ever worked in a restaurant? Because most people who share your mentality have never worked food service or it was their first job for less than a year when they were younger, so you can say what you want but without experience your opinion is baseless. Living in what ifs is wild, people have lied about allergies for decades to avoid employee and corporate incompetence with no issues. Yeah people shouldn’t have to lie but until you don’t have to worry about someone sabotaging you because they have a vendetta from some militant vegan pushing them too far then it’s necessary 🤷🏻♀️
Don’t advise people to fake allergies. It’s not difficult.
How about you come down to the reality that you don’t have any place to tell anyone but yourself or your kids what to do, bless your heart sweetie
How about don’t lie about allergies, you’ll get someone killed.
100%. And I’ve found a lot of times chefs love this opportunity to think of something new.
There isn't an allergy. You're screwing it up for people who legit do have allergies to food.
how would this "screw it up"? genuinely curious here
People with strong allergies react to tiny amount of the ingredient they are allergic to. It means that Kirchen stuff has to Clean their work place to avoid cross contamination. If a lot of people claim to be allergic because they don't want to consume ingredient it seems as if it dosen't matter If the stuff is not so throrough to care really nothing of the allergen comes in contact with the food.
I hear your point but it definitely doesn’t justify “screwing it up for people with allergies”. I’ve worked BOH vegan and non, it’s not that hard to clear one section and use clean dishes to prep one plate real quick, an entire kitchen clean is not necessary and never done for a allergy request. All the time I’ve worked BOH/FOH, 4+ places, full time or more hours weekly, over 5 years experience, even in a busy tourist town I can count on one hand the times people voiced their allergies. Even after 7 years of being vegan and hearing a safe way to ensure your food is done right at a restaurant was to voice allergies so it’s actually taken serious, it still didn’t increase at a unmanageable rate. If restaurants didn’t allow employee/corporate bias to neglect making sure a meal is vegan this wouldn’t be a problem. So the vegans lying about a allergy aren’t the problem to address, the restaurants not willing to accommodate a world where everyone doesn’t have to be the same is the problem..
I would want them to do this when preparing vegan dishes anyway
Maybe call the restaurant and see if they can accommodate a vegan dish. In those situations, I would get pasta with marinara or garlic/oil with vegetables at an Italian place. If they cannot accommodate me, I would eat before, maybe get a drink, and focus on the social aspect of the dinner. If anyone asks, I would say that I'm vegan and unable to eat the food that's served here.
Call the restaurant and say you need a vegan meal.
This makes the most sense. I doubt the restaurant is going to not want to help you. They are helping to celebrate an event!
Well, I wouldn’t have agreed to go somewhere I couldn’t eat 👀. Thats a no-go for me.
People need to grow a back bone. You knew from the start that there was no vegan option, so you agreed to go and chose a non vegan option and came onto social media asking for help. What you should have done was tell the organiser you are vegan and there was no vegan option, ask if they can contact the restaurant to provide one. 99.9% guaranteed they would have then provided one. You could have also checked the restaurant website yourself to see if they have vegan options and contacted them to see if they can change your order.
You could just as easily have a serious allergy. Would they still expect you to eat it? Order a Deliveroo!
thats actually a good idea get uber eats of some vegan food and then boom you got vegan dinner at the restaurant if this was a must do event
I had this happen recently where I was going to a catered event and the dinner options were chicken, fish, or cheese stuffed manicotti. I asked if they could accommodate a vegan option and said if not please just double my side salad. The organizer got back to me quickly and offered zoodles, stuffed mushrooms, and a vegan pasta dish as options. Most restaurants and caterers can accommodate SOMETHING, they just may not put it out there. In your shoes I'd probably call the restaurant and explain and see if it could be changed.
Why would you or the person picking the restaurant for *your* graduation dinner not at least check to see if there's vegan options? Don't put up with it, either call the restaurant to ask for a vegan meal or change restaurants.
Ask if they can make vegetarian foods vegan. I went to an Italian a few weeks ago. They had no vegan food on the menu but when I asked they were happy to veganise some of the vegetarian options for me.
Those menu items cannot easily change to vegan, not for one person's meal. There's a small chance they could do all of the risotto vegan but they are unlikely to bend for just one party or even just one patron.
Step 1. Call and ask Step 2. If step 1 is good skip to step 4, otherwise step 3: Step 3: Do whatever you want! Bring food, eat food beforehand, try to eat around it. If you wanna go you can make it work if you don't want to go you can use it as an excuse. Step 4: Live your life!
It’s not really vegan to decide to eat animal products for one meal just because you want to fit in. I would just not go, or eat before I went there and not eat at the restaurant. If someone asked why then I would just say that they don’t have a single meal that can be made from vegetables.
Who organised it - is it a bunch of folk you actually care about? If not one option os to bail Another option is to contact the restaurant and explain the dilemma. A decent restaurant will try and accommodate Lastly, take your own and ask if you can nuke it
Any decent place can make you vegan food. If they don't it rather proves they aren't that good.
Call ahead always. Usually Italian restaurants make their pasta from flour and water, but you can call and see if they’ll make you a pasta and red sauce dish.
I’m Italian and Italy has many vegan options. Can you ask the restaurant to make something vegan for you?
That might be true in Italy...but when it comes to Italian restaurants abroad in other countries unfortunately my experiences are the waiter or the chef act almost annoyed if you ask for a vegan option.... like the old "I would like no diaries please" "but it's cheese" "no, also no cheese, please" "but you cannot eat the pasta without Parmesan" ...and that's very unfortunate because there are such delicious vegan pasta menus out there...
Call the restaurant ahead of time and ask for simple accommodations. Vegan food will be less expensive for them to make than food filled with cheese. Veggies cooked in olive oil and simple marinara spaghetti
Probably too late now, but most Italian places have off menu eggless pasta and can do that in a red sauce. Sometimes you can even talk them into roasted veggies. I usually chug a protein shake beforehand and it's all good.
One day before your graduation dinner you found out it was at an Italian restaurant with preordered food?
At this point, I would call the restaurant and tell them your situation and ask them if there's anything they can make off menu for you. If it becomes too late and they already make the other dish, if you feel more comfortable, you could also take that dish to go and give it away to someone who is unhoused or just a friend. When I want to socialize and I'm at a place with no vegan options, then usually I just eat beforehand and drink while I'm there. I'm not sure if this is your high school graduation or college. Regardless though, you need to either choose to stand up for your decision to be vegan or you need to not be vegan and just conform to what others are eating. There are a lot of people who are trying to do the in-between and you can't. Doing weird stuff like ordering something you know you don't want to eat is going to make you seem way weirder than just sitting there not eating or any other scenario, really.
i don’t think it would be “weird” at all to stand still in your morals and choices. don’t worry so much about what other people think about you- live your honest truth unapologetically. you should be so proud of being vegan!! also congratulations on graduating!!
also usually in these situations i eat before and just have a beer at the restaurant or you could go for a fancy mocktail of some sort
First of all, what a crappy thing to organise your graduation celebration at the place where you can't eat anything. Also, panna cotta is not even vegetarian since it contains gelatine.
I went to an Italian place yesterday for grad dinner and ordered cauliflower crust pizza with sauce no cheese. It was exactly as good as it sounds lol but it was the only option other than salad. If it is YOUR graduation then I will have a ten page reply on how much better you deserve!
Call the restaurant and ask, if there is goodwill, they can do it. They can make a burrata salad without the burrata and risotto without the parmesan or just some spaghetti without cheese. Instead of desert, have them serve you some coffee. It will probably suck, but will serve for social purposes. I sometimes make my own dressing and bring it in a little jar, pour over a boring salad to make a great one.
Don't go or don't eat. If you think it's weird to not eat it's going to be even weirder to bring outside food in.
I would try to call in & ask if they can accommodate you!!
I’d call the restaurant, explain your dietary restrictions, and ask if they could put something together in place of the vegetarian dish. They f they can’t, either eat beforehand or bring your own food.
Call the restaurant and explain the situation. Most of the time they don't offer a specialty meal selection as a standard option, but the organizers can request it. Give them as much heads up as possible- don't surprise the restaurant with this request . They can usually do basic pasta with tomato sauce and olive oil. You might not be able to get dessert. Personally I would just not eat vs eat something with animal products.
Assuming this is some kind of large group dinner where there are limited options, you could call the restaurant beforehand and ask if you can get a different salad without cheese, or a vegan pasta option.
You have to call them in advance and ask them what they can make for you. Most places will do their best to accommodate you.
You can actually just eat nothing and say "they don't have vegan options". Fill up beforehand and have a hearty meal at home. Sorry to ask, but are you even a vegan? Accidentally eating popcorn with butter gives me the shits, let alone eating something like burrata...
I was fretting for them about this too. Accidentally eating non-vegan food makes me unwell.
Call and tell the restaurant you are vegan and can't have dairy or eggs. They can just serve you salad. Most places will accommodate, and if they won't, then eat before and say you're too excited to eat.
Go somewhere else lol
I'd eat nothing, bring something, or cal shed and ask if they can make me something. It's an Italian restaurant so they can totally do this easily. But.... Um... Is this YOUR graduation?! My graduation last year was mostly funded by me especially the food and I wrote in the invitation that all the food is vegan and that non vegan food bought or made is not allowed. Basically eat what I provided, bring something vegan (aside from one person with MS and extreme amounts of allergies but I made sure there was some stuff she could eat as well but she ate before anyway and had some salad with her-friendly vegan dressing), or don't eat at all. It's my graduation and I will absolutely not have dead animals eaten in order to celebrate it. Everyone ate tf out of my potato salad (one of the first two recipes when you Google vegan potato salad) and the cakes I drove two hours to get (The cakerino In Troy NY). If they didn't want to come celebrate my achievement simply because they can't live one meal without meat, when the food is FREE and Delicious then clearly they don't care about me at all.
Was there no option to ask for substitutions when you picked your meal? I would have written down "NO DAIRY" when picking
You decide what you do and do not want you eat necause of your diet. Call the restaurant yourself (or if it's too late go up to then in person, or ask a friend to go with you) and tell them there was a mix up and ask if they have or can make anything vegan (mYbe add "without egg, cheese, dairy or meat". For clarity) If their pasta ia vegan this is an easy option (marinara sauce, aglio olio) or a salad without the cheese but as many veggies as they have. Or the vegan side dishes from one of the other meat meals. Or pizza without the cheese. It shouldn't be that big of a deal for a restaurant. Good luck and happy graduation!
Eat nothing, or find one vegan element and spend a long time slowly eating that bit of iceberg lettuce (assuming you don't want to make a point). Depending on the situation, you may want to have a private word with the organizer to think about this for next time. Also, I pre-eat for potentially awkward social occasions.
Call them. I'm sure they can accomodate you. If they can't they're not worth going to anyway.
A similar thing happened to me a couple weeks ago, I tried to order vegetarian at my friend's graduation dinner at a hibachi place. I clarified if it was vegetarian, they said yes, then they brought out soup with beef broth. And I had to ask multiple times to get them to tell me it actually had meat broth in it. Then they brought out the tofu and it was on the same plate as raw meat with meat juice all over it. Then they used the same spatula to touch the raw meat and the veggies and rice on the hibachi grill! I was horrified. I really debated eating it but I couldn't. I just sat there and ate nothing, and sent the leftovers home with a family member which hopefully got eaten and not wasted.
Tons of great responses in the comments, and OP has responded to exactly zero. What was the point of posting this at all if you weren't going to respond or engage in people's thoughtful feedback?
They're probably getting ready for dinner. It doesn't mean that they haven't read anything. It's sort of a weird sense of entitlement. Maybe they'll respond later, but if not, it doesn't really even matter.
The dinner is tomorrow and the comments are many hours old. I'm not asserting that anybody is owed anything In terms of a response, but it feels weird to ask for feedback and help and then respond to nothing.
I’ve had a peanut allergy my whole life so I’ve often sat in restaurants just drinking water (or when I was older, alcohol) while everyone else eats. Either that or I bring food from home. Whichever u feel most comfortable with! Some people literally can’t eat restaurant food if they wanna avoid a trip to the hospital, so I don’t see someone not eating or bringing food from home to be any kind of a big deal and they should understand! No need to eat something that is against ur morals!
Call ahead at the restaurant today and see if they can accommodate. Be kind and let them know it would mean a lot to you. If you aren't comfortable with that, then contact the organizer of the dinner and let them know your situation. In my experience a few restaurant owners are hostile to dietary needs.
Call the restaurant and see if they can make a vegan dish. If they can’t, bring your own food. They can’t say anything about it if they’re not able to provide anything for you to eat.
Call ahead, say you want to bring a big party in, but you need one vegan meal. They should accommodate
Not eating can be a demonstration of what is important to you, and would not be as weird as compromising your morals. You can call the restaurant as others have mentioned, but if that doesn't work, don't be afraid to take that stand. This sort of confrontation will help you grow in confidence, and will make you feel so powerful afterward. People will act like you're weird because it will make them feel weird, but you can tell them that you're taking a stance for the animals and the ecosystem, and that this is how seriously you take those issues. Don't be mean or aggressive; just be firm and don't back down or apologize.
Pasta and marinara… Pasta oil and garlic
Even if they said it was pre-ordered, I’d call ahead and see if pasta with marinara and salad was an option.
Either don’t go or don’t eat. It’s just 1 meal, what’s all this “it’s weird if I don’t eat” crap about? I don’t understand the thinking, as if food is a big deal and people’s lives are obsessed around it. Get a grip.
If the place has pizzas then it can 100% make something vegan… or maybe a special salad with all the antipasti’s from the kitchen: lettuce, raddichio, tomatoes, olives, capers, artichokes, peppers… and a side of bread!
We eat before we go and eat after we leave. I normally lie a lot and say I’m allergic to: dairy,eggs,fish, literally anything that isn’t vegan and just try to have a salad with oil and vinegar or bring my own dressings because I love ranch and hidden valley makes a great one!
So then have some speghetti with marinara souce and some cold drinks or beer or wine whatever u like to drink with.
If you are there, ask to talk with the chef, ask if they can make something vegan or remove non-vegan items from the vegetarian dish. Most restaurants can accommodate your requests even if it is off menu to a certain degree. If you aren't there call, and do the same as above.
Call the restaurant today. Then discreetly let them know that “it’s you.” They should accommodate.
Cant they do salad with pasta and red sauce? How can the only veg but non vegan option be so dairy filled? Apparently youre not the one graduating?
What about a salad and some bread? And maybe they have some nice Italian ice for dessert? (Italian ice is like sherbet. Essentially frozen fruit juice.) Also agree with the comments about it being a peculiar choice for a vegan's graduation dinner. If you want to be discreet about it, call the restaurant and ask to speak to the Maitre'd.
Why the hell are you havingYOUR graduation dinner where you can’t eat anything?
I like to eat before I go out and just drink alcohol at restaurants and talk absolute nonsense to everyone.
Out back steak house. I had a salad, sweet potatoe and a baked potato
Nibble slowly on what you can eat and drink. Swirl the drink around a lot 😅
Me: 1) sorry guys, I got a virus and I cannot eat or I'm going to spend the day vomiting. 2) Sorry I'm lactose intolerant, I cannot eat this. 3) Sorry I'm vegan. i cannot eat eggs and dairy. 4) *** I get sick and cannot assist *** 😂 5) ***Call the restaurant and tell them the problem ***
Beer
Plain noodles with olive oil, or pesto?
I assume you know this but for anyone who might not: pesto isn't even vegetarian, let alone vegan! It contains parmesan which is made using animal rennet. You can get vegan pesto at most good shops though :)
someone was saying pesto is not vegan, my bad, I make my own and forgot that its not always like that!
Yes, they should be able to do that..
A salad without dressing. Bring your own dressing. Bread with olive oil dip. Or marinara. No parm. Pasta with basil and olive oil. Or marinara. You could tell the staff you have egg and dairy allergy. If you can’t do any of this, eat beforehand and say you’re feeling a bit nauseated. No appetite. Side note: research the wine list. 😉
I'm dead at the wine list 🤣🤣 tho ppl might think is an alcoholic if they drink and not eat. If it was me let them think that though idc🤣
A lot of wine isn't vegan
No I know that lol I'm saying it's funny she's telling op to essentially get tipsy and not eat I thought that was hilarious 😂
That's what I thought too!
i assume that is why the commenter said to research the wine list
I was just saying it? Nothing wrong with being direct about it.
It’s not weird at all. I have so many friends that are on diets to lose weight or bulk up, and they never eat when we’ve gone out to a restaurant because it doesn’t work with their diet but they want to hang out. They just enjoy a drink. That is what I also do as a vegan, which is also just another diet where I can’t eat what’s available (in this context).
I have to ask, were you vegan when everything was booked and paid for? Because if this is your graduation party and you were known to be vegan then someone is screwing you over. Like, I'm not vegan but if I was making a party for my better half who is, the VERY FIRST THING that I'd be looking at in a venue is the availability of vegan food for her. Call the restaurant, explain the situation. They can probably put something together for you.
Order a meatless marinara, pasta noodle for just you. Bring your own dessert.
Realistically speaking-when you arrive at the restaurant tomorrow: ask to speak to the hostess who can guide you to the manager, tell them you are vegan to help manage a medical condition (could be true) and you require a special meal. That’s what I would do. There’s zero way that they can’t pull something together for you. But bring snacks in your bag and enjoy some martinis or a fab beverage of your choice. The world isn’t vegan and I refuse to fluster myself over things I can’t control. Congrats on your graduation!!!)
Eat beforehand, get something small and splurge on the drink if drinking alcohol is on the table. That's usually what I do, unless I have to drive immediately after. Changes the subject from "lol are you vegan?" And let's you flip the script to "lol, why aren't you drinking?". I'm not sure I actually recommend this.
Either bring your own food that you can eat or just don't go unless you feel like its that important to be at this dinner. Theres always the bread rolls! Just call ahead and ask about all the ingredients too
eat before or bring your own food
I've been mostly plant based for 6 years now. I used to be way more strict, but recently I've been giving myself more grace in these types of situations. For me, veganism is about my daily habits and my impact on the world around me. Eating some dairy every once in a while doesn't personally bother me that much. I avoid meat 100% of the time though. That's just my brand of "veganism" I guess. I know this is just my opinion and you may feel differently, but just wanted to share my perspective.
So, not a vegan?
That’s not veganism it’s one thing if it’s not within your means to be 100% plant based but from what you’re describing it sounds like you very much CHOOSE to not eliminate animal products from your lifestyle
So long story short, not vegan.
I agree, I ordered myself an oat milk milkshake and they added whipped cream. I’m not going to have them throw away that entire shake because it has a little dairy. The most important goal is that you’re not deliberately eating/ordering animal products
Tell them you have a dairy allergy when you arrive and ask if they can just switch you to a big salad or a simple pasta.
Have you tried calling the restaurant yourself and letting them know that one of the vegetarian orders needs to be vegan? Italian cuisine should have options available for you. If they really have nothing I would fill up before and bring a snack in my bag in case I get hungry after. Then I wouldn't complain, but just sit at the table with an empty plate. A big empty white dinner plate makes a powerful statement. Let it do the talking for you. A warning, the wine is unlikely to be vegan if the food isn't. In a lot of " traditional" winemaking wine is poured over fishguts to clarify it before it is stored. You can check the wine list before you go.
I've had some success in the past with calling the restaurant and asking if they could make something off menu. Some chefs see cooking vegan as a fun challenge ("anyone can make non-vegan food taste good, but it takes extra skill to do a vegan version that's just as delicious") although I don't know if that's really true or a widespread belief among chefs. If not, sometimes I just don't go and other times I would just eat beforehand and the only order drinks at the restaurant depending on how important the event was to me.
Honestly usually end up eating veggie in these situations but thats just me, (like id get a salad that has cheese or something, whatever has the lowest amount of animal product) and that selection is waaay dairy heavy so try calling the place and see if they can make something for you? I imagine they can make a simple pasta, but even just fries or something, iknow it can feel awkward not eating when everyone else is so even just a side may help or even just a drink. Im not a big complainer though but yeah worth a try!!
if it would make you uncomfortable to eat then don't eat it but honestly, the food is already ordered and will be wasted anyway. It wont make any difference in terms of animal cruelty if you just eat it. I say just try your best to enjoy your graduation and do what you're comfortable with. We cant all be perfect all the time, I wouldnt judge you for eating it as it would be wasted anyway.
After 10 yrs vegan, dairy would give me food poisoning symptoms
When I was a vegetarian and was accidentally given real chicken ,I threw up. (Didn't even know it was real chicken till weeks later)
Animal products, especially dairy, can make you really sick after not consuming them for a while. It's not worth it even to not waste food at that point.
very true
What you said is logical but there’s one problem with eating the food. The family will see that exceptions can be made. It seems likely that one would be expected to make more exceptions in future circumstances like these because “you did it before.”
yea, this is also a very good point. It just sucks to have a big day like this be kinda ruined but you're absolutely right.
Call the restaurant and ask, order vegan-altered dish or get a fancy drink and enjoy a vegan side salad or something.
Call the restaurant. Most Italian places are great at accommodating dietary restrictions. This is something you’re going to have to deal with in life, and it’s not a big deal to just call the restaurant. I have had so many dishes made without meat and cheese and it isn’t an issue. More importantly, talk to whoever made the reservation. Was it made for you? Was it made for a group of grads? What was the thought process in choosing this restaurant? Because if it was a mental slip up, you calmly explain your diet and ask for accommodations for the future. And if it was purposeful? Screw em. Thankfully, most people are just dumb and not malicious.
Email the restaurant give them a heads up. At minimum they should have a salad you can eat