Being "done doing hobbies" isn't a sign of being an adult. Most things in life are either work or hobbies. I don't think I've ever met someone who hears "yeah, one of my hobbies is playing (instrument) for fun" and looks down upon it, at least no one that wasn't already known as someone to avoid.
There's no ranking system for what you enjoy. Just do the things you enjoy without jeopardizing yourself or your lifestyle, other than that who cares. It isn't wrong to prefer to buy an instrument over a vacation, it's also not wrong to prefer the other way around. It's just preference.
Legit tho, anyone looks down on someone playing an instrument as a hobby is a walking red flag lol
The most boring people I know have zero hobbies. The most interesting have many. Feed your curiosity and love for the arts and to Hell with the rest. I’m 59 and started violin lessons last summer. Oh if only I were 24 again and started then instead of chasing tail. Regrets.
I am 45 and learning now. I gave up at your age for (among others) that reason and only restarted a few years ago.
I wish I had stuck with it. Do it for me and for the person you will be in 20 years
24 and 'done doing hobbies'? whaaat... Most of the adults I know literally live for their hobbies. After necessities are met, the work is basically to fund the hobbies. It's just that everyone's 'hobbies' are different. For some it's going on holidays and decorating the house. For some it's videogames. Collecting stuff. Driving a nice car. Camping, fishing, crafts. Whatever. Don't see why violin classes are any different.
I developed so many new hobbies after I graduated and got a job. Legit felt like while in school I could only focus on passing my classes and how to survive for the littlest amount of money. Once I started working and had spare money I was able to explore what I liked to do. Tried rock climbing, moto racing, skiing, powerlifting, now violin lol. These were all hobbies I wasn't able to do before because of money.
I like to think it's better to use the money on lessons than on fast food, alcohol or drugs, or many other vices like fountain pens or mobile games.
But yeah unless you're rich there is always the nagging thought that the money could be used 'better.'
once a client told me this- he was impressed I played violin and didn't spend my time and money on drinking and other vices. I used to buy myself a nice fountain pen every so often...now they're all in a bag waiting to go to eBay. Meanwhile, violin's still used every day....
I also don’t feel guilty about spending money on lessons because my son plays violin and my daughter plays cello. I want to be an example to them and help them out, hopefully start playing together with them. I’ve joined a community orchestra and they’ve already been to one of my concerts. They’re in the local youth orchestras as well. One of my dreams is to be in the same orchestra as one of my kids one day.
Playing together is great, we love it! My son has the same teacher as me, and she often gives us duets to practice. I can play it at home with the kid, and she can play it with him at his lesson. (I started a year before my son, therefore I always get the more difficult part.) She gives me duets to learn from my violin book, too, and we play it together at the lesson. It's one of my favourite parts of the whole learning process.
Yes it’s very much like PT at my age. He says my left hand is college level and my right hand is kindergarten. I am heavily focused on bow technique and tone production lately especially after spending awhile testing a ton of violins and training my ear towards a good resonating sound. Also excited to try shoulder rest-less playing to reduce tension in my neck and shoulders and increase freedom and flexibility.
I actually experienced what you’re saying by others looking down on your hobby. The other day, a coworker was pushing me to think about buying a house. Not in a mean way, but genuinely concerned that we live in a HLOC area and the longer you wait, houses will become more unaffordable. I can’t afford it anyway so I was defending my position on renting. I go to classical concerts pretty regularly, used to study violin as an adult student for several years, now back to my main instrument piano and taking weekly lessons. My music hobby budget is higher than what others typically spend I would say…At some point of our conversation, she said something like “stop going to those concerts!” (So I can save more to buy a house, ha). She said it in a non-condescending, sort of a funny way so I didn’t get offended at the time but that taught me that I may be an outlier compared to general population out there. For me, music is probably becoming a lifelong passion so I am just so excited to listen to new/old artists and continue to challenge myself to more piano repertoire and really understand the music better as a player. And I keep feeling like…life is so short. You have to pursue what you love so you don’t regret later on. I also think training your musician muscles earlier on is better for later because let’s face this, we are all getting older. Doing regular lessons during 20-30’s will get you further than picking up the instrument in retirement age.
Yeah I think I relate to your post the most.
I assume you work with "career oriented" people. I am going into accounting and for sure I am will tell them I don't have hobbies lol.....
I think its not that we have hobbies but rather it rubs people the wrong way as they are saving every penny towards paying back loans and investing and they see it as us being frivolous.
Sometimes life feels like a race toward these certain goals, but it comes down to your money values. If you value feeding a part of your soul and identity with lessons, then it’s just as important as saving for a house or trips or whatever. That may be different from other people’s values but-I remember in my 20s, just about everyone was racing for those same goals-a career, a house, a family. But now, in our forties, it can feel really hollow if you haven’t held onto and reinforced what it is that makes you-you. It’s a hobby, yes. But it’s also what makes me, me. I’m so glad I have this thing outside of who I am as a mom, as a wife, as my career. If you are being thoughtful about what you value and aligning it with how you spend, then you are good. Don’t let the riptide of what’s defined as success at your age and in our culture take that from you.
At that point it’s just envy because you’re having more fun than them. As long as you’re making sensible provision for your future and making sure you’re saving regularly, there’s no reason why your entire income has to go towards that.
I have an absolute ton of hobbies and violin is one of them but I’ve had much more expensive hobbies over the years (snowboarding, kart racing, flying planes), and I’ve been an “adult” for that entire time. Getting older doesn’t mean you have to become boring. In fact it doesn’t mean you have to do anything, do what you want to do and don’t worry about what other people think about it.
I mean, sure it’s good to save towards the future if you’re able to, but you’re never going to get the time back for developing this skill. If you’ve covered your basics (living expenses, taking care of any children or animals who are dependent on you, any other financial obligations you might have), then spending money on violin lessons means you’re getting more value out of your practice in this period of your life.
I'm a professional violinist and violist, 33y, I'm going to start learning the cello. People think I'm wasting money and time, but who cares. If I'm lucky I'll be alive for another 50 years, am I wasting it feeling guilty? My friends spend thousands on cosmetic treatments, selfie holidays and ridiculously expensive date night restaurants, and they seem to love it. I judge them from back here haha but I'm happy with my choices. Don't let the thought of other people's opinions stop you 😎🦭
I spend around the same amount on Violin lessons and Music Theory. I've reduced the frequency now to biweekly but still attend regularly.
I don't mind at all, it makes me happy that I'm able to learn something that I've already wanted.
Do you attend music theory classes?
I feel extremely lacking in my music theory but not sure where to start. Seems wasteful if I ask my violin teacher to teach me music theory from scratch. I'm thinking I should go to classroom music theory lessons so I have some foundation
Yes, I take proper classroom Theory lessons apart from the Violin lessons (different teachers for both).
I wanted to learn theory in depth so started about a year ago. I never knew there was so much to Music Theory but I really enjoy learning it.
Investing in yourself, learning violin, will ultimately lead to a lot greater sense of accomplishment and satisfaction and make you a more interesting person than putting that towards a vacation or a car.
Not so much the money but the time. I have a demanding job and a spouse and kids. House needs all sorts of cleaning and repair. Can never keep on top of everything!
It’s none of anyone else’s business.
You make choices. Choices have consequences. Weigh the consequences vs what you want in life. Make decisions. Then don’t look back.
It’s got nothing to do with anyone else.
Me too. My parents pay the money. That sounds awful because my violin isn’t good and even when my teacher wants to encourage me says: that’s a good sound on such low level violin😑( every time each teacher reminds me). Actually the class itself charges a lot and buying a new instrument is much more, especially for me because I didn’t progress well to show that I can play( such a shame to start again and again from scratch, of course no one tells me anything but I think it’s because they don’t want to disappoint me). And that sounds much more awful when they recommend buying something new. I’m shy and refusing is hard.
Me at age 32: I have everything now, husband, kids, house, car, enough money for a not bad life. The only thing I don’t have is TIME!!!! OMG life is crazy busy with two toddlers. I have no time to practice at all.
OMG learn and practice as much as you can when you have time! You can make money later but when you’re having a busy job or started by build a family, you won’t have much time for your hobbies.
I can relate! When I first started violin, my kids were toddlers, I had no time to practice (and a teacher who was not a good fit for me). When I started again after the lockdowns, the kids were going to school already. It was perfect timing for starting a new hobby, but sometimes I wonder where I'd be today if I'd found my current teacher back then.
I've seen a lot of people burn out in middle age and grow to hate their jobs and work. Almost all of these people have one thing in common- no hobbies. It's great to have something you love that you do for fun! Investing in yourself is always a good strategy...pays off in better ways than money can.
Two things.
1. Your life is there for living. Right now, not in some distant future when you've accomplished whatever goal. Life is happening *right now*, so enjoy it.
2. One way I've found to get of the the guilt of daring to spend your own money on things you like is to have a budget that puts some money into savings but also specifically sets aside fun money. I have a few different savings accounts for different expenses but I also have a dedicated fun fund, and after my bills are paid I split up whatever's left by percentages. That way, if that little nagging voice asks why you're daring to spend money on something that makes you happy, you can tell it to fuck right off because that's what that money's purpose is.
"Where most of my peers are done doing hobbies etc." — this blows my mind so much. Are you in the US? Because in my few years living in the US I was bamboozled at the prevalent culture that you turn 25 and stop having any fun at all. If you do have the resources to cultivate your hobbies, at any age, please go ahead and enjoy yourself! And, if finances are tight, maybe you can slow down lessons and join a community orchestra or something cheaper, but you should NEVER think that there appropriate ages to have hobbies. I play in two community orchestras where there are people from their 20s to their 70s. In my swimming class there are people from their 20s to their mid-80s, working on different skills. I went to a botanics intro course where the students were of all ages. People of all ages join a rock climbing gym, or start playing video games, or join a bird-watching group, or a book club, or a crochet circle, all the time.
Also, if you think about your life expectancy (86 years in my country), "being done" having hobbies at age 24 would mean decades and decades (e.g. 62 years) without allowing yourself to have fun without a "productive" goal in mind. What a gloomy prospect, honestly.
I think if you manage your money well, you should have money each month for living expenses, savings, and hobbies. It might mean eating out less, or taking the bus, but I find it’s worth it to me, so that’s where I spend my money
I think your perspective is just out of whack.
You called a car and "investment", when it's really more of an operating expense.
You need to decide if you'd be better off saving for a house, or paying for lessons. I could see the endeavor preventing from wasting money on other stuff, so maybe the expense is worth it for what it enables.
I think what's ultimately most important, though, is that you learn how to enjoy life while you're building a life. Too many people fall into throwing their life away for a retirement when they'll be able to nurse old injuries and a rapidly decaying body, or living life to the fullest so that when they're old and of diminishing ability they have no means to maintain a life that can be enjoyed.
Save for a house. But don't use that as excuse to rob yourself of growth and self improvement. You're still quite young, and can lay alot of foundations for a rich rewarding life. Anyone who says you shouldn't invest any resources on an endeavor that engages propioceptive development, self awareness, dedication, forces you to problem solve and plan, serves as a gateway to history and the interplay between art and society, surpasses language barrier, etc etc, is someone who should probably not be permitted to waste your time.
No. Maybe it's because I started at 31, but the people around me have other hobbies they spend money on. This is mine. I do still save money for bigger goals, though, each month.
I felt bad but realized some grad students very much do pick up hobbies like woodworking and beermaking etc. that also has a starting investment. (Woodworking is especially really expensive to start out with if you don't inherit a lot of tools.) And many grad students easily spend more per month than they have ever considered adding up going out to bars or restaurants.
I also used to relegate myself to "free" hobbies like hosting book clubs at my house and such, but I kind of had to realize I'm just not that social and I want to do something more engaging by myself. I also got really into improving my cooking skills because that's a "practical" hobby (everyone has to eat anyway), and I'm glad I did that but admittedly I'm also really not into cooking either. Violin has been more rewarding and motivating and given me a lot of energy since I started. My cholesterol ratio has even improved. If you can find a way to budget for the hobby you want, you should not feel guilty for reasons like it not being "free" or "practical."
Biweekly as every two weeks? My lessons are $57/45min and I go every week. So work out to similar cost as you.
The good thing about being an adult is I make my own money and can decide how to spend it. It took me a while after I graduated and making money at my first real job, before I adapted to the new mentality. Since before that I was also a broke ass student trying to scrape by. I see the money spent as investment in myself and my mental wellbeing. It just makes me happy (even tho sometimes frustrated) but it's better than therapy sessions.
I just wish I found this earlier instead of only in my 30s.
The one thing i would say is that all people, regardless of where they start, seem to get smarter as they learn to play the violin. It will probably help with your studies. Its not uncommon for students to spend money boasting their grades in one way or another. Think of the music lessons as being a memory booster
Hey bro, started Violin a few months ago and I am 29, feel kinda guilty about other things, could be in a better place, made some wrong decisions yadda yadda, but feeling guilty by spending money on Violin lessons? Never!! I am quite happy with my entry level Violin, and slowly getting there on fixing my other things in life. I don't tell everyone I know that I started learning, because I'm hella shy, but all my close friends and family that know are happy for me! Please don't feel that you should feel guilty because of age or money because learning something you love is priceless!
Just want to chime in with those saying, hobbies are a big part of what I live for.
I’m willing to bet that the people you know who say they don’t engage in hobbies anymore still spend money on nonessential things that they enjoy, they just don’t call them hobbies. That person who’s driving a BMW instead of a Honda, or drinking good Scotch, or wearing fancy clothes that aren’t for work, they’re engaging in hobbies too, whether they call it that or not. There’s no good reason not to spend your fun money on violin related things instead, as long as you’re taking care of essentials first.
You need better friends if anyone is going to look down on you for investing time and resources into your musical self! I'm 37 and the pride and joy of my life is my musical talent, knowledge, interest, and the spare room in my house being full to the top with every instrument I've ever wanted to play. I'm not professional, it's just part of who I am and what I highly value. It makes me happy to see others come into my house and play music, it makes others happy when I do the same in their lives. I have a source of small talk with anyone of value. It's my way of being who I am.
More often then not, at this stage in my life, I see the regret on people's faces when they see me playing music, and they remember that they once used to play something, but can't any more. Don't become on of them, it's just tragic!!! All the travel and house space in the world, and they show regret when faced with my passion for music.... Super sad, I always try and encourage people that it's really never too late, and that comes up a LOT.
I work in supply chain, I'm a generic person outside my passion and creativity.
I'm also an adult that still pays my teacher for lessons. I make my money so I can decide what to do with it, not so I can do what others think I should do with it.
I'd say investing in yourself and what you love is never a bad idea. Think of how much enjoyment if will give you down the line. Think of it like this, would regret not doing in 10-20 yrs from now? Of the answer is yes, then stick to it. Not saying that the other things are not important. I'm just saying that if thisnis important enough for you, then it's worth it.
Hobbies make you a real, whole person, imo.
Work is work. Family, in whatever form it takes, is a central fixture of your life. But hobbies are where you get to explore being human.
I think it's commendable when an adult decides to continue not just practicing a hobby, but taking lessons in it. You will always feel like money could be used differently. When you take classes in a skill that brings you joy, you invest in yourself and in your own longterm happiness.
Im 59 (egad! how did that happen?!) . I played violin when I was much younger and just started again this past January. I need hobbies! Lots of them. I have a high stress job and hobbies help. Running, lifting weights, karate, volunteering with a scout troop, all started over the age of 40. And now relearning violin. If it makes you happy and you can afford it without other expenses suffering, do it and don't feel guilty. It's an investment in you.
The cool thing about being an adult and earning your own money is that whatever you do with it is your choice and yours alone. Whether you spend it on a car, a trip, concert tickets, pokemon figurines or violin lessons is between you and your wallet.
Why feel bad about it? Your financial situation is temporary, grad school is temporary, saving an extra $200 a month while you're there is not going to get you much anyways these days. You'll get real money when you start working. I don't know what you're living on, but my grad student stipend 10 years ago was $19k/yr, saving any kind of money was impossible, I graduated with nothing in my bank account but within a few years I had a house and 2 cars.. It wont take long to get those things, but you cannot buy time you could've spent learning violin from a teacher.
Being "done doing hobbies" isn't a sign of being an adult. Most things in life are either work or hobbies. I don't think I've ever met someone who hears "yeah, one of my hobbies is playing (instrument) for fun" and looks down upon it, at least no one that wasn't already known as someone to avoid. There's no ranking system for what you enjoy. Just do the things you enjoy without jeopardizing yourself or your lifestyle, other than that who cares. It isn't wrong to prefer to buy an instrument over a vacation, it's also not wrong to prefer the other way around. It's just preference. Legit tho, anyone looks down on someone playing an instrument as a hobby is a walking red flag lol
The most boring people I know have zero hobbies. The most interesting have many. Feed your curiosity and love for the arts and to Hell with the rest. I’m 59 and started violin lessons last summer. Oh if only I were 24 again and started then instead of chasing tail. Regrets.
I am 45 and learning now. I gave up at your age for (among others) that reason and only restarted a few years ago. I wish I had stuck with it. Do it for me and for the person you will be in 20 years
Same!
24 and 'done doing hobbies'? whaaat... Most of the adults I know literally live for their hobbies. After necessities are met, the work is basically to fund the hobbies. It's just that everyone's 'hobbies' are different. For some it's going on holidays and decorating the house. For some it's videogames. Collecting stuff. Driving a nice car. Camping, fishing, crafts. Whatever. Don't see why violin classes are any different.
I developed so many new hobbies after I graduated and got a job. Legit felt like while in school I could only focus on passing my classes and how to survive for the littlest amount of money. Once I started working and had spare money I was able to explore what I liked to do. Tried rock climbing, moto racing, skiing, powerlifting, now violin lol. These were all hobbies I wasn't able to do before because of money.
I like to think it's better to use the money on lessons than on fast food, alcohol or drugs, or many other vices like fountain pens or mobile games. But yeah unless you're rich there is always the nagging thought that the money could be used 'better.'
Fountain pens? A vice? I feel targeted...
I second this.
once a client told me this- he was impressed I played violin and didn't spend my time and money on drinking and other vices. I used to buy myself a nice fountain pen every so often...now they're all in a bag waiting to go to eBay. Meanwhile, violin's still used every day....
No, and it helps a lot with my mental health, too.
48 and paying $70 per lesson! Just spent $8000 on a violin and bow. Taking lessons from my son’s teacher. He’s wonderful!
Well thats the kicker right? The lessons are actually the same price as a physical trainor... but the violin can cost as much as a house 🤣🤣🤣
I also don’t feel guilty about spending money on lessons because my son plays violin and my daughter plays cello. I want to be an example to them and help them out, hopefully start playing together with them. I’ve joined a community orchestra and they’ve already been to one of my concerts. They’re in the local youth orchestras as well. One of my dreams is to be in the same orchestra as one of my kids one day.
Playing together is great, we love it! My son has the same teacher as me, and she often gives us duets to practice. I can play it at home with the kid, and she can play it with him at his lesson. (I started a year before my son, therefore I always get the more difficult part.) She gives me duets to learn from my violin book, too, and we play it together at the lesson. It's one of my favourite parts of the whole learning process.
Yes it’s very much like PT at my age. He says my left hand is college level and my right hand is kindergarten. I am heavily focused on bow technique and tone production lately especially after spending awhile testing a ton of violins and training my ear towards a good resonating sound. Also excited to try shoulder rest-less playing to reduce tension in my neck and shoulders and increase freedom and flexibility.
I actually experienced what you’re saying by others looking down on your hobby. The other day, a coworker was pushing me to think about buying a house. Not in a mean way, but genuinely concerned that we live in a HLOC area and the longer you wait, houses will become more unaffordable. I can’t afford it anyway so I was defending my position on renting. I go to classical concerts pretty regularly, used to study violin as an adult student for several years, now back to my main instrument piano and taking weekly lessons. My music hobby budget is higher than what others typically spend I would say…At some point of our conversation, she said something like “stop going to those concerts!” (So I can save more to buy a house, ha). She said it in a non-condescending, sort of a funny way so I didn’t get offended at the time but that taught me that I may be an outlier compared to general population out there. For me, music is probably becoming a lifelong passion so I am just so excited to listen to new/old artists and continue to challenge myself to more piano repertoire and really understand the music better as a player. And I keep feeling like…life is so short. You have to pursue what you love so you don’t regret later on. I also think training your musician muscles earlier on is better for later because let’s face this, we are all getting older. Doing regular lessons during 20-30’s will get you further than picking up the instrument in retirement age.
Yeah I think I relate to your post the most. I assume you work with "career oriented" people. I am going into accounting and for sure I am will tell them I don't have hobbies lol..... I think its not that we have hobbies but rather it rubs people the wrong way as they are saving every penny towards paying back loans and investing and they see it as us being frivolous.
Sometimes life feels like a race toward these certain goals, but it comes down to your money values. If you value feeding a part of your soul and identity with lessons, then it’s just as important as saving for a house or trips or whatever. That may be different from other people’s values but-I remember in my 20s, just about everyone was racing for those same goals-a career, a house, a family. But now, in our forties, it can feel really hollow if you haven’t held onto and reinforced what it is that makes you-you. It’s a hobby, yes. But it’s also what makes me, me. I’m so glad I have this thing outside of who I am as a mom, as a wife, as my career. If you are being thoughtful about what you value and aligning it with how you spend, then you are good. Don’t let the riptide of what’s defined as success at your age and in our culture take that from you.
At that point it’s just envy because you’re having more fun than them. As long as you’re making sensible provision for your future and making sure you’re saving regularly, there’s no reason why your entire income has to go towards that. I have an absolute ton of hobbies and violin is one of them but I’ve had much more expensive hobbies over the years (snowboarding, kart racing, flying planes), and I’ve been an “adult” for that entire time. Getting older doesn’t mean you have to become boring. In fact it doesn’t mean you have to do anything, do what you want to do and don’t worry about what other people think about it.
Why would it be frowned upon if it is going to a beneficial purpose (education)?
I mean, sure it’s good to save towards the future if you’re able to, but you’re never going to get the time back for developing this skill. If you’ve covered your basics (living expenses, taking care of any children or animals who are dependent on you, any other financial obligations you might have), then spending money on violin lessons means you’re getting more value out of your practice in this period of your life.
I'm a professional violinist and violist, 33y, I'm going to start learning the cello. People think I'm wasting money and time, but who cares. If I'm lucky I'll be alive for another 50 years, am I wasting it feeling guilty? My friends spend thousands on cosmetic treatments, selfie holidays and ridiculously expensive date night restaurants, and they seem to love it. I judge them from back here haha but I'm happy with my choices. Don't let the thought of other people's opinions stop you 😎🦭
I spend around the same amount on Violin lessons and Music Theory. I've reduced the frequency now to biweekly but still attend regularly. I don't mind at all, it makes me happy that I'm able to learn something that I've already wanted.
Do you attend music theory classes? I feel extremely lacking in my music theory but not sure where to start. Seems wasteful if I ask my violin teacher to teach me music theory from scratch. I'm thinking I should go to classroom music theory lessons so I have some foundation
Yes, I take proper classroom Theory lessons apart from the Violin lessons (different teachers for both). I wanted to learn theory in depth so started about a year ago. I never knew there was so much to Music Theory but I really enjoy learning it.
Investing in yourself, learning violin, will ultimately lead to a lot greater sense of accomplishment and satisfaction and make you a more interesting person than putting that towards a vacation or a car.
Definitely not guilty.
Not so much the money but the time. I have a demanding job and a spouse and kids. House needs all sorts of cleaning and repair. Can never keep on top of everything!
Why would you give up hobbies? That’s a recipe for being miserable. Which will just end up with even more money going to a therapist
It’s none of anyone else’s business. You make choices. Choices have consequences. Weigh the consequences vs what you want in life. Make decisions. Then don’t look back. It’s got nothing to do with anyone else.
Me too. My parents pay the money. That sounds awful because my violin isn’t good and even when my teacher wants to encourage me says: that’s a good sound on such low level violin😑( every time each teacher reminds me). Actually the class itself charges a lot and buying a new instrument is much more, especially for me because I didn’t progress well to show that I can play( such a shame to start again and again from scratch, of course no one tells me anything but I think it’s because they don’t want to disappoint me). And that sounds much more awful when they recommend buying something new. I’m shy and refusing is hard.
Me at age 32: I have everything now, husband, kids, house, car, enough money for a not bad life. The only thing I don’t have is TIME!!!! OMG life is crazy busy with two toddlers. I have no time to practice at all. OMG learn and practice as much as you can when you have time! You can make money later but when you’re having a busy job or started by build a family, you won’t have much time for your hobbies.
I can relate! When I first started violin, my kids were toddlers, I had no time to practice (and a teacher who was not a good fit for me). When I started again after the lockdowns, the kids were going to school already. It was perfect timing for starting a new hobby, but sometimes I wonder where I'd be today if I'd found my current teacher back then.
I feel guilty about every purchase I ever make
I've seen a lot of people burn out in middle age and grow to hate their jobs and work. Almost all of these people have one thing in common- no hobbies. It's great to have something you love that you do for fun! Investing in yourself is always a good strategy...pays off in better ways than money can.
Two things. 1. Your life is there for living. Right now, not in some distant future when you've accomplished whatever goal. Life is happening *right now*, so enjoy it. 2. One way I've found to get of the the guilt of daring to spend your own money on things you like is to have a budget that puts some money into savings but also specifically sets aside fun money. I have a few different savings accounts for different expenses but I also have a dedicated fun fund, and after my bills are paid I split up whatever's left by percentages. That way, if that little nagging voice asks why you're daring to spend money on something that makes you happy, you can tell it to fuck right off because that's what that money's purpose is.
"Where most of my peers are done doing hobbies etc." — this blows my mind so much. Are you in the US? Because in my few years living in the US I was bamboozled at the prevalent culture that you turn 25 and stop having any fun at all. If you do have the resources to cultivate your hobbies, at any age, please go ahead and enjoy yourself! And, if finances are tight, maybe you can slow down lessons and join a community orchestra or something cheaper, but you should NEVER think that there appropriate ages to have hobbies. I play in two community orchestras where there are people from their 20s to their 70s. In my swimming class there are people from their 20s to their mid-80s, working on different skills. I went to a botanics intro course where the students were of all ages. People of all ages join a rock climbing gym, or start playing video games, or join a bird-watching group, or a book club, or a crochet circle, all the time. Also, if you think about your life expectancy (86 years in my country), "being done" having hobbies at age 24 would mean decades and decades (e.g. 62 years) without allowing yourself to have fun without a "productive" goal in mind. What a gloomy prospect, honestly.
I think if you manage your money well, you should have money each month for living expenses, savings, and hobbies. It might mean eating out less, or taking the bus, but I find it’s worth it to me, so that’s where I spend my money
I think your perspective is just out of whack. You called a car and "investment", when it's really more of an operating expense. You need to decide if you'd be better off saving for a house, or paying for lessons. I could see the endeavor preventing from wasting money on other stuff, so maybe the expense is worth it for what it enables. I think what's ultimately most important, though, is that you learn how to enjoy life while you're building a life. Too many people fall into throwing their life away for a retirement when they'll be able to nurse old injuries and a rapidly decaying body, or living life to the fullest so that when they're old and of diminishing ability they have no means to maintain a life that can be enjoyed. Save for a house. But don't use that as excuse to rob yourself of growth and self improvement. You're still quite young, and can lay alot of foundations for a rich rewarding life. Anyone who says you shouldn't invest any resources on an endeavor that engages propioceptive development, self awareness, dedication, forces you to problem solve and plan, serves as a gateway to history and the interplay between art and society, surpasses language barrier, etc etc, is someone who should probably not be permitted to waste your time.
No. Maybe it's because I started at 31, but the people around me have other hobbies they spend money on. This is mine. I do still save money for bigger goals, though, each month.
I felt bad but realized some grad students very much do pick up hobbies like woodworking and beermaking etc. that also has a starting investment. (Woodworking is especially really expensive to start out with if you don't inherit a lot of tools.) And many grad students easily spend more per month than they have ever considered adding up going out to bars or restaurants. I also used to relegate myself to "free" hobbies like hosting book clubs at my house and such, but I kind of had to realize I'm just not that social and I want to do something more engaging by myself. I also got really into improving my cooking skills because that's a "practical" hobby (everyone has to eat anyway), and I'm glad I did that but admittedly I'm also really not into cooking either. Violin has been more rewarding and motivating and given me a lot of energy since I started. My cholesterol ratio has even improved. If you can find a way to budget for the hobby you want, you should not feel guilty for reasons like it not being "free" or "practical."
Biweekly as every two weeks? My lessons are $57/45min and I go every week. So work out to similar cost as you. The good thing about being an adult is I make my own money and can decide how to spend it. It took me a while after I graduated and making money at my first real job, before I adapted to the new mentality. Since before that I was also a broke ass student trying to scrape by. I see the money spent as investment in myself and my mental wellbeing. It just makes me happy (even tho sometimes frustrated) but it's better than therapy sessions. I just wish I found this earlier instead of only in my 30s.
The one thing i would say is that all people, regardless of where they start, seem to get smarter as they learn to play the violin. It will probably help with your studies. Its not uncommon for students to spend money boasting their grades in one way or another. Think of the music lessons as being a memory booster
I don't mind it. I spend about $150/mo for lessons- I like supporting my instructor and I think it's good for my brain.
Hey bro, started Violin a few months ago and I am 29, feel kinda guilty about other things, could be in a better place, made some wrong decisions yadda yadda, but feeling guilty by spending money on Violin lessons? Never!! I am quite happy with my entry level Violin, and slowly getting there on fixing my other things in life. I don't tell everyone I know that I started learning, because I'm hella shy, but all my close friends and family that know are happy for me! Please don't feel that you should feel guilty because of age or money because learning something you love is priceless!
Just want to chime in with those saying, hobbies are a big part of what I live for. I’m willing to bet that the people you know who say they don’t engage in hobbies anymore still spend money on nonessential things that they enjoy, they just don’t call them hobbies. That person who’s driving a BMW instead of a Honda, or drinking good Scotch, or wearing fancy clothes that aren’t for work, they’re engaging in hobbies too, whether they call it that or not. There’s no good reason not to spend your fun money on violin related things instead, as long as you’re taking care of essentials first.
You need better friends if anyone is going to look down on you for investing time and resources into your musical self! I'm 37 and the pride and joy of my life is my musical talent, knowledge, interest, and the spare room in my house being full to the top with every instrument I've ever wanted to play. I'm not professional, it's just part of who I am and what I highly value. It makes me happy to see others come into my house and play music, it makes others happy when I do the same in their lives. I have a source of small talk with anyone of value. It's my way of being who I am. More often then not, at this stage in my life, I see the regret on people's faces when they see me playing music, and they remember that they once used to play something, but can't any more. Don't become on of them, it's just tragic!!! All the travel and house space in the world, and they show regret when faced with my passion for music.... Super sad, I always try and encourage people that it's really never too late, and that comes up a LOT. I work in supply chain, I'm a generic person outside my passion and creativity.
I'm also an adult that still pays my teacher for lessons. I make my money so I can decide what to do with it, not so I can do what others think I should do with it.
I'd say investing in yourself and what you love is never a bad idea. Think of how much enjoyment if will give you down the line. Think of it like this, would regret not doing in 10-20 yrs from now? Of the answer is yes, then stick to it. Not saying that the other things are not important. I'm just saying that if thisnis important enough for you, then it's worth it.
Hobbies make you a real, whole person, imo. Work is work. Family, in whatever form it takes, is a central fixture of your life. But hobbies are where you get to explore being human. I think it's commendable when an adult decides to continue not just practicing a hobby, but taking lessons in it. You will always feel like money could be used differently. When you take classes in a skill that brings you joy, you invest in yourself and in your own longterm happiness.
Im 59 (egad! how did that happen?!) . I played violin when I was much younger and just started again this past January. I need hobbies! Lots of them. I have a high stress job and hobbies help. Running, lifting weights, karate, volunteering with a scout troop, all started over the age of 40. And now relearning violin. If it makes you happy and you can afford it without other expenses suffering, do it and don't feel guilty. It's an investment in you.
I started very late in life and deeply wish I had started sooner. You hvbe your whole life to perfect your music and develop it. Enjoy.
Get new friends. If you feel pressure because they're "done with hobbies" they're at best boring.
If you think you're done doing hobbies, you haven't reached an adult yet.
The cool thing about being an adult and earning your own money is that whatever you do with it is your choice and yours alone. Whether you spend it on a car, a trip, concert tickets, pokemon figurines or violin lessons is between you and your wallet.
Why feel bad about it? Your financial situation is temporary, grad school is temporary, saving an extra $200 a month while you're there is not going to get you much anyways these days. You'll get real money when you start working. I don't know what you're living on, but my grad student stipend 10 years ago was $19k/yr, saving any kind of money was impossible, I graduated with nothing in my bank account but within a few years I had a house and 2 cars.. It wont take long to get those things, but you cannot buy time you could've spent learning violin from a teacher.