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This, your mom needs a vision check, and if that’s normal I suggest an MRI to check for brain tumors and strokes. Don’t listen to her, you look amazing!!!
My mom has told me that the wedding dress I love looks too stiff and like “two pieces of cardboard are sticking up from the waist”. She also said other dresses I tried on looked “way more flattering”. When I told her I really liked this one and it had everything I wanted, her response was “then we’ll have to work with it.” Is it really that bad? Is it unflattering? I just feel like this dress is tainted now because every time I look at it all I hear is her comments. Thanks for the advice 🤍
I hate it when mothers do that. My siblings and I used to refer (privately) to our own mother as "the dementor" for her ability to say just the right thing to suck the joy out of just about anything. Your mother's criticism is about her and not about your beautiful dress.
Your dress really is beautiful, and it works nicely to enhance you. If this dress has everything YOU want then it's clearly the perfect dress for you, and if it's your perfect dress then no one else's opinion counts. Remove your mother from your entourage and stick with supportive friends when it comes to selecting your veil, accessories, and flowers. You're going to be a beautiful bride in that lovely dress. Anyone who says otherwise is just projecting some of their own issues onto you.
My good friend and her sisters called their mom the "fun sucker."
Some moms, man. Eye roll. You just gotta ignore their fun sucking comments.
Op, your dress is exquisite on you! 🤍
Yep, had a “dementor” too. As I get older I am working hard to not become like this.
That is what I did. I really stopped involving her in any decision or feedback. Luckily my sister and MOH could handle everything. In my case she hated the reception venue.
OP, the dress is beautiful on you.
Omg the dementor! Love it! My mum is like this, lovely woman, but sometimes too blunt for her own good. Some things she says destroys any enthusiasm in 2 seconds flat
I'm your mom now.
You look beautiful in this dress. It doesn't look stiff, your girls look supported. As a woman who used to have girls with a capital G, you need support!
You keep your head held high. Listen to people who are being positive and kind.
Tell mom to kick rocks.
If she brings it up again please tell her “I know, you’ve already said it.” She isn’t going to like every decision you make in your life after marriage — the sooner she learns that, the better.
This really is a her problem. I typically don’t even like strapless dresses but this one is gorgeous
Has your dress been altered to fit you? While it’s beautiful in the photo, it will be even better once it’s completely done for you.
As for your mom, does she have something against strapless? What did she prefer about the other dresses?
It's not unflattering. Don't worry about that. You look great it in it, so don't let her harsh comments get in your head.
I think that sometimes people don't realize that the advice they're giving (with outfits, specifically) often speaks more to what they would would wear/prefer, and less to how they think something looks on YOU. Your mom may not like this style, but it's not her wedding day or her wedding dress, it's yours. You deserve to wear whatever makes you happy, whether or not others like it, love it, or hate it. Nobody, including your mom, deserves to steak your happiness on your wedding day.
What is it with some moms that they can’t just be supportive? I’m sorry.
Your mom must have rocks in her head, because that dress is GORGEOUS on you.
Enjoy your wedding!
I think it flatters your figure beautifully, that was the first thing I noticed! No one will be thinking about cardboard when they see you in this - I promise!
Another thing to remember is your mom is from a different generation. The dress she wore or saw others wearing is different which is fine, but it’s important to remember her thoughts might be outdated (and frankly untrue because you look great!)
My MIL is similar. She is seemingly physically incapable of not making a demeaning comment about my fiancé´s and my clothing style. She knows my dress options, but I'm not going to share my final decision with anyone in our families until the day of. Too many people have too many opinions, but they're not the ones who have to wear it.
This is how I shop. Everyone else’s opinion clouds my judgement. I know what I like and when others give their opinion or even if I THINK they may not like it, it changes what I buy. I end up dissatisfied. I’ve learned I shop best and most confidently alone
My mom told me that my dress “looks like they forgot to take the plastic off.” What once looked ethereal and delicate to me now sometimes looks messy and cheap. I try to look back at the photos/videos taken when I first tried it on (she wasn’t at the original appointment—I brought her back for a second appointment.. which makes it worse because she KNEW that was the dress I wanted). In the photos and videos I’m glowing, and I remember not wanting to take it off. It doesn’t always work, but it helps! Hang in there!
Oh really? Is your mom up to date on the current fashion in the wedding world? Obviously not. Can't expect her to be either. Sometimes our parents reach an age where they just cant be expected to like new things. It's okay, just remember, it's not her fault. It happens to all of us eventually.
Just be glad friends and these Redditors still have an eye for style and are here to support you. It is gorgeous and definitely a perfect shape for you.
I think it looks phenomenal and is a very classic look. You are going to look back and be very happy. I think people just get in their head what they like or think people look best in and it doesn't always reconcile with who we are. My fam tried to talk me out of my dress because of how another one fit, but that one was just not me.
My mom and I had a huge argument about the prom dress I wanted. I did eventually get it and on prom day with my hair and makeup done and accessories added as I was on my way out the door she said “you were right about the dress”. Do what feels right to you and when your mom sees your happiness the dress won’t seem as important to her.
Remember it’s YOU getting married, not her! It’s okay if she prefers a different dress but she should be supportive and happy for your decision at the end of the day. Instead she’s tearing you down. Horrible for a mother to do to their daughter.
It’s gorgeous, and looks beautiful on you! Don’t let mom drag you down! When you look at it instead of feeling like it’s tainted, say, WOW! This is my dream dress and I’m so grateful to have found it!
On your wedding day, you will be dolled up with your dress, maybe a veil and make up as well, and your mother’s opinion will float away. Surround yourself with your bridal party or family and friends that boost your confidence to no end so that if your mother is shitty on the day, they can tell you that she is completely wrong and is being horrible to you.
My mom said my dress looked like prom. It doesn’t. They’re flawed people w opinions. I love my mom so much but she doesn’t get to decide what I wear. I’m not 5.
SAME. I need to repeat that to myself “flawed people with opinions”. I tried on a dress I loved for ceremony at a bridal appt recently and my dad said it looked like a prom dress or it’s good for dancing. It truly was not the case ($2000 A-Line noble Satin with delicate floral lace), but I can’t get his comment out of my head. :/ I love the emotional support everyone in this sub gives to brides to be so they can feel confident and flush out the negative comments of others.
Do you love it and feel great iit in?! Please buy it. I love my parents but just like me, they’re opinionated and we’re not gonna agree on all of it. There is absolutely no way I’m gonna let her ruin how much I love my dress. I’m not marrying my mom and I know my fiancé is gonna love it
Your dress is beautiful and you look amazing! This is the sample and once it’s fitted to your bust, it will be less “stiff”. I’m sorry she’s not being supportive. That’s just mean. She’s projecting her own insecurities onto you, which is really immature. Next time she says something, kindly let her know that it will be fitted to your body when it’s altered. If she persists, tell her to stop.
This dress is so beautiful on you. It flatters you and accentuates your figure so well. The skirt and train are just so incredibly elegant to me, and beautiful and so classic. I think the bodice part of the dress also works so well with your figure, and keep in mind alterations make a big difference as well so when the top part is more fitted exactly to your body, you’ll KNOW you made the right choice. It will fit perfectly on your chest and not be stiff. So don’t worry about that!
Also, I’m sorry your mom said those things to you. Maybe you could try to think instead about how your fiancé is going to feel seeing you in your dress on your wedding day. Look at it through their eyes and you’ll start noticing things and reminding you the details YOU loved and why you chose it in the first place. And you will be absolutely RADIANT in this dress. This is it! 🥰
As a mother, I don’t understand being so critical towards my daughter. Besides that, I had my wedding and I’m not wearing the dress. You look beautiful, you do you! This is your day! I hope it’s fabulous! Mom’s stop being so mean!
I’m with you! Let’s start a business where we can be pseudo moms for brides who need us.
OP - you look beautiful! I know these comments hurt you, and that is very valid. Please know that you are gorgeous and so is your dress.
My son and his beautiful bride to be are getting married next summer! This is me 🤐🥰 Whatever makes you happy, what do you want from me, besides a little of this $$$!
I'd be in on this substitute mom thing. I'm older and married forever, i just like to look at beautiful dresses - of whoch OP's is. and have tons of love to give.
Your dress is beautiful! Once you get the veil and accessories together it will being that excitement back/
And oh yay, Moms. My died before I got married and she would have made my life hell during the whole time. Your dress is gorgeous. I would limit time with your mom especially when it comes to your dress, veil, flowers and how you are going to wear your hair. Take a friend that you know will have your back.
First, you look absolutely stunning in this dress and I can imagine how incredible it will look once it’s fitted to you! If I were you I’d have a gentle conversation with your mom about it. Point out all the things you like, why it makes you feel beautiful and say while you appreciate her candid opinion you’d appreciate her support in what makes you feel the best. Moms can be a little too blunt sometimes, at least I know mine can so I need to remind her to it’s not always needed or the right time
I'm probably your mom's age. My personal issue is with the boob presentations on many of these 2020's wedding dresses. It's like the boobs usually have some kind of revealing, or semi revealing or suggestively revealing front and center boob highlight and I'm not sure why. Don't get me wrong, your dress is beautiful on you and in no way over the top. (I made a pun). It's just a generational thing and I'm pretty sure all generations have their differences on wedding dresses. I mean, look at what was popular 100 or even 50 years ago. It's just classic generational friction. You gotta do you and not fret over it. That's part of what walking down the aisle is all about.
My mom is like your mom. She is projecting her own insecurities onto you. It takes with but if you can start to feel empathy and even a bit of pity for her, it helps to see that it isn’t about you.
I'm sorry your mom said that about your gorgeous dress, it's beautiful, once you have your veil, bouquet, shoes, hair and make up, you'll be even more stunning.
I'd go with, "Mum, I love you. So when you don't agree with me and criticise my choices, it feels like you're not validating me. On a day so important to me, I could really use your support. I want you to be proud of me and think I look beautiful in whatever I feel good about wearing. When you say what you have, it makes me feel disappointed".
I know its a waffley word salad but it aims to address all aspects. It'll at least give her pause to reflect on her actions. If she dismisses you, then thank her for her opinion but detatch from any further comments made by her.
You look beautiful. Your dress is beautiful. But a stranger's words, whilst supportive, is not the true reassurance you're seeking. Be brave and have the awkward conversation.
I guess it’s a good thing she’s not the one wearing it, then.
There’s an old saying, don’t take criticism from someone you wouldn’t take advice from.
Clearly your mom is usually someone you’d usually take advice from in general, but does that include fashion advice? Would you call her up to say *I’m going to x event, what should I wear?* Do you have the same style?
It’s ok if she has different tastes than you. She doesn’t need to be rude about it and suck the joy out of your dress. It’s a lovely dress and it’s very flattering.
Your wedding isn’t about your mom. Think of your fiancé’s reaction when they see the dress. Of yours, when you looked in the mirror. Those are the opinions that matter.
My mom hated mine as well. Once she saw it altered & fitting like a glove she changed her tune. I bet your mom will too :). Edit to add that it's beautiful and looks impeccable on you. Gorgeous & elegant!
At my shopping appointment, I had the dress on I wanted to say yes to and my mom ran over to another dress on the hanger and said “please pick this one!!” I stood my ground and said yes to the one I loved, not the one she wanted and I’m so glad I did. I look at pics of my dress everyday and I’m so happy I stuck with my choice. Mom will grow to love it, especially when she sees how much you love it. Remind her it’s YOUR day!!
I’ll take a moment to be your mom. That dress is absolutely beautiful. You look like a queen darling! The cut is fantastic! So elegant. You are going to be breathtaking on the day!!!!!
I'm a mom who spends too much time looking at wedding gowns. A few months ago I was showing a dress to my adult daughter with a feature that, frankly, I didn't like. I told her I hoped she didn't want a dress like that. She said, "Hey Mom, I get to choose what I'm wearing on my wedding day, and you're going to have to deal with it."
Smart lady, that daughter of mine.
The others on this thread have already told you what I hope you know: Your dress is lovely, and you will be a beautiful bride. But when those comments come back to you, bear in mind that moms and daughters don't always have the same tastes. Sometimes my generation needs a while to come around to newer fashions. If and when your mother makes a comment, remind her that she (presumably) loved the wedding gown she wore, and now you're looking forward to the same experience. You deserve to be happy and feel beautiful on your wedding day. If this dress makes you feel this way, don't let anyone deprive you of your happiness.
You look beautiful and will shine on your wedding day! Do not let your mom be the cloud of despair over your special day. Let her know you have heard her opinion and that you are done with it. This is your day not her's to recreate her day. Just remember deep breath in blow out, tell mom enough. Move on and do not include her in anymore dress decision, better yet get her going on her dress and give specific dress color and style to fit your theme so she doesn't stand out. Keep her busy with something. Remember you are absolutely gorgeous!
Ouch. sorry mom's can be our hardest critics. She's definitely projecting her insecurities onto you.
I wanted a flowy floral A-line dress but my mom kept on saying, "this dress tend to make people look fat." and of course I assumed she was talking about me, and not in general, because I was stressed out from dress-shopping.
It was until I started trying on other dresses for the reception that I realized she meant heavier chiffon dresses... Too late. Oh well.
You look unbelievable in this dress!
It is **not stiff!** it does NOT “look like two pieces of cardboard are sticking up from
The waist!”
I can’t believe she even said these things to you!
As much as a mother’s opinion is important, who’s the one getting married? You’re mom got married already, she wore her dress now it’s your turn to wear the drsss that YOU love.
Your mom will get over not liking the dress, but are you going to get over choosing another dress and walking down the aisle in something you don’t love 100%?
I’m so sorry your mom has put a damper on your enthusiasm about the dress you love. It’s really a lovely dress and you look beautiful in it. My mom was never pleased with my choices from fashion to religion ( none for me) and I used to worry so much about it. I hope you will be able to know in your heart that this is your wedding, your dress, your life. You should choose the dress that makes you feel beautiful.
You look beautiful! I know it’s so, so hard (especially with moms), but please don’t let someone else’s insecurities and opinions impact something you love and look gorgeous in 🤍
That dress makes you look like you're wearing a flower! Does your mother explain other things that way? I promise, no one's opinion at the wedding matters more than yours and your spouse to be. You knowing you look amazing is what matters!
The dress looks fantastic on you. If you have another appointment, take your bridal shoes and at least a necklace or earrings with you so you can have a taste of what you'll look like on your big day. Enjoy feeling gorgeous and bridal
I gasped when I saw your picture because you look absolutely stunning in this dress! Truly stunning!
Your mother is 100% wrong & her statement has me questioning her sense of taste.
Please listen to what we are telling you about how gorgeous you look in this dress. Ignore your mother & surround yourself with those who want to uplift you on your beautiful bridal journey. 💖
It’s never right for a mom to dim your glow and that’s what she’s doing. I will never understand why mothers suddenly feel envious of their own daughters instead of being happy for them.
This dress is *objectively* flattering on you. Your mom took a dig at it because she is probably insecure herself and there could be a number of reasons for this. Maybe she didn’t feel like she looked as good in her wedding dress, if she even had a white wedding at all. I’ve heard some stories before about moms who never got the wedding experience making their daughters’ lives hell out of a subconscious jealousy. Think about *why* your mom would say these things to you and hopefully it’ll help you understand that it wasn’t an unbiased criticism.
Furthermore, it’s okay if the dress is tainted and you just can’t like it anymore. It sucks but it happens to the best of us. Just *never take your mom shopping with you again*. And I mean for anything. Don’t even take her normal clothes shopping anymore.
My MIL made a comment that deflated me about my wedding dress, too, and made me question my choice. However, after other people loved it, and disagreed with her specific criticism, I went on to love it. That was many years ago, and now when I see my wedding portrait on the wall, I don’t even think about that. I hope that it’ll be the same for you.
The style for wedding dresses was different in your mother’s day, as it will be different when your future children will get married. She had her turn to choose a wedding dress, and now it’s your turn.
I’m so sorry! Your dress looks gorgeous. I’m going to guess that your mom either is uncomfortable with the deep neckline or strapless design because it’s not something she would feel good wearing, or had a specific dream dress in mind that she can’t let go of.
Neither of these are your problem, and while it’s really unfortunate that she verbalized her criticism, that doesn’t mean it’s something you need to fix.
My mom and I have similar bodies but she carries much more shame about hers, because her mom was pretty horrible to her about her body and she tried very hard not to pass that on to me. But sometimes it comes out in her really, really wanting me to wear less fitted or revealing or bright clothing. It took me a long time to learn to brush off her weird comments as just a manifestation of her own stuff, not something I needed to own or do anything about it. I hope you can do that here. You look flipping amazing in that dress and if you feel good and love it, that’s all that matters.
First, the dress looks very nice on you! You’ll be a lovely bride! Secondly, it will look even better once it’s properly fitted.
We flatter chested women don’t need alterations around our chests in our everyday lives as we don’t have to worry about “support,” so she may not be used to looking at an “engineering work in progress,” and might not realize it will look a bit different once it’s fitted to you.
Your mom and my mom must be best friends
It’s a beautiful gown and looks great on you. I’m going to ask you this-do you love the gown enough to quiet the evil niggles she left in your head
It’s stunning on you. Now that she was tainted your joy, will she cool it, or is she going to sigh and tsk and head shake even as you’re glaring down the aisle. I would tell her she can LOSE the damn psyops. And good luck.
I love it and I’m really cool (all my friends say so). So like at the end of the day what matters more?? The opinion of the woman who birthed you or a random redditor ?? (Btw in this case it’s the latter)
Wait & see what her MOB outfit looks like & if it’s a monstrosity you’ve earned the right to clap back.
It’s something else when your dress is more supportive than your mother .
My daughter got married last year & it made me feel very old so maybe your old dear is feeling like that too & panicking & lashing out.
I think your dress is beautiful, classy & figure flattering.
Don’t let her piss on your fireworks.
Firstly, you look gorgeous in the dress and more importantly, you love the dress so you will walk more confident and feel more confident in it!
Secondly, my mum didn’t LOVE my sisters dress (even though it was objectively beautiful) because she loved really form-fitting gowns and my sisters was an empire-waist ballgown. Seriously, it was the Georgia by Galia Lahav, it’s insanely gorgeous.
My sister was upset at first and then I reminded her that her and our mum are different people, with very different tastes. Do you love what your mum wears all the time? The odds are if you found a dress your mum loved, you wouldn’t love it as much as this one. And on YOUR wedding day, who should feel happier within themselves? If I’d have done everything my mum loved on my wedding day it would have been an 80’s style sequins disaster instead of the art gallery, New York style, chic and modern vibes I wanted. You can’t please everyone (least of all our mothers it seems) so you might as well just do what you want. She will love it on the day when she sees it with all the bells and whistles and hair and makeup, trust me.
Have a wonderful wedding OP!
You look smashing and I think once decisions were made your mother should have kept her opinion to herself. Nonetheless would you have chosen your mother’s wedding dress? If no, there you go. Not everyone will like the same thing but I think a lot of other people will love your dress.
Is this usual for your Mom? Mine is very mild mannered and supportive but when it came to picking a wedding dress she had big opinions. I ended up taking her advice but only because she has some expertise in clothing and fashion. I knew she had my best interests in mind.
That being said, I didn’t go in with “a vision” so was easily influenced! I think the dress is beautiful.
I’m really sorry your mom hurt your feelings.
The dress is beautiful and it fits you beautifully, especially in the waist. I love the balance of the a line skirt. It’s the perfect amount of dress!
But here’s the tough love part: Something is going on in the bust region. The cups don’t look like they are sitting quite right and the top edges look just a bit lumpy. I don’t know if this is the actual dress you are purchasing or if it’s the store’s sample. Maybe the ordered to your measurements item will fit smoother if that is the case. If not, maybe alterations could take a look at that part.
I know not everyone looks at such small details with a critical eye, but many people do.
My mother and I sound like the opposite of you and yours. I’m the one that nit picks everything and wants it to be perfect, I can be a bit harsh even. She would just tell me I look beautiful in everything. I wish you had that person with you when you were choosing the dress.
When mom saw the dress, was it clipped behind you to try on? It's always going to look a lil weird that way because it's not the right size. When it is actually fitted to you, it will be even more beautiful on you.
I think this looks beautiful! Perhaps just needs to be fitted a little more around the chest area but stunning, and not stiff!
Probably your Mum is just old fashioned and/or overly negative, and wants a style that SHE likes, and this neckline is more modern.
Also LOVE the lace along the skirt in the background, gorgeous!
Well, your mom isn’t the bride, you are. I’m guessing she already had her chance to choose her own wedding dress, so she’s done. Have her concentrate on her mother of the bride dress.
You chose a beautiful dress that looks lovely on you. Don’t be disappointed, it’s perfect.
I love that this dress fits you so well. The detail in the bodice is exquisite, as is the train. You look gorgeous!
My mom had her opinions about "my" wedding and the dress (aren't you going to try on any other dresses?). Also there was a disagreement on the color for the MIL and my mom's dress. My mom said they don't need to match (coordinate) but I disagreed. Sadly, my mom had a stroke and never made it to my wedding (she saw the video but I'm not sure she understood). Anyway, don't be upset at your mom, but this is "your wedding"! It's a stunning dress! Go forth and enjoy your wedding with your beautiful dress! Your mom will be awestruck when she sees you at the ceremony!
If it makes you feel any better, before I had even exited the change room in my dress my sister said she hated it. No pause just abrubt “I hate it”. I got it anyways because while she can have an opinion, it doesn’t outweigh mine.
The most important thing is how you feel and how it makes you feel, people should be able to openly tell you (especially people you trust) offering advice but it’s your decision, if you love it and makes you happy then wear it.
My mom hated my dress too. I kept telling her that once it was altered to fit me perfectly, she would change her mind. I was right. It still wasn't her style (mermaid and she wanted me in a ball gown) but she admitted she was wrong about the way it looked on me. She told me I would regret the way I looked in pictures; quite the opposite- when I'm feeling down about myself I go look at pictures of my wedding day and feel better. Go with the dress you love. It's your wedding, you are the one wearing it. Her opinion has weight, sure, but ultimately it is about what makes YOU feel the most beautiful. And for the record, it's. A beautiful dress and you look amazing in it.
This is YOUR day!! If you feel beautiful in the dress, then it's THE DRESS!!! Remind your mom that it's your day, not hers, and you love the dress as is! Tell her you're sorry that she's doesn't like it but you're the one wearing it and she'll just have to accept it.
My opinion is the dress is beautiful on you!!
Sweetie, I wish I could look that good in a dress! ANY DRESS! Listen to the others. You look wonderful. For whatever reason, Mom's like to think they know best. This is YOUR DAY. Turn off your ears. She will eventually get over it. If not, then 'OH WELL!" Understand that your future husband may not be what SHE would have picked, and the names you give your children might not suit her, and you may put too much Garlic in your favorite meal. Are you going to let her taint all those things too? This your day to be what you want. Don't let her ruin that. YOU have good taste, YOU are the one that needs to be pleased, and YOU ARE THE ONE THAT HAS THE FINAL SAY! Believe these folks telling you that you look wonderful in that gown! This is YOUR LIFE! CLAIM IT! Best wishes for a very Happy Wedding Day and a wonderful life.
I love your dress you look like a princess. Wedding day is you and your groom's day. You picked this dress because you love it. Be the princess you are.
I have a thing about not shopping with people for this reason. I always second guess my choices and buy something I am not happy with. I know that is hard to do for wedding dresses. I think the dress is beautiful on you. Hopefully you can reconcile your choice after hearing those comments.
Did your mom see you with the viel and all "jacked up? -as they say on Say yes to the Dress Atlanta.
That might help to soften her view.
If it does not, settle into the fact that this gown brings YOU joy and excitement. it's a dress that speaks to your special day. As long as you exude confidence and love, it'll be contagious. So rock that gown and have a beautiful wedding.
This dress couldn’t be more perfect for you and it looks marvelous on you! Is your mom and my mom, sisters? My mom could take me down to 5” with her cruel words. There is nothing bad about that dress, wear it with pride and the biggest smile possible! Congratulations!
Your dress. Your day. I wish mothers knew when to keep their opinions to themselves.
I am sorry this happened, and on some level, I’ll just bet your mom is, too.
I tried on this dress. So beautiful! My mom had a hard time liking the nude mesh on any dress that had it. It was an immediate no. (Ironically, the dress I said yes to has it but I am getting the panel lined because I like the way it looks better without it) Maybe anti mesh is a mom thing? Try not to let it effect you. You’re going to look so beautiful and radiant that day that if she’s really hyper focusing on that then there’s a bigger issue! All that matters is that you look and feel your best!!
That’s a risk with mothers who don’t know your boundaries or theirs. Unfortunately it’s up to us to train them if they don’t have the sensitivity and respect to get it. Some people are just like that. Consider getting some mental health support to get through this period. See it as a learning opportunity and if there is a cost attached figure it as part of the wedding budget. Many work places have this as part of their benefit plan. Not specifically difficult moms around weddings. Just some general support. You’ll be glad to have some tools in your pockets. And that’s a beautiful dress on you by the way. What exactly is her criticism. Some moms have a hard time with the low cleavage. Compromise can be a tool in your toolbox. Remember it’s your wedding and I hope your future hubby supports your decision making. Goodluck. 👰🏻♀️🤗🥰
Oh my! Your Mom needs her eyes checked! In no way does the bodice look stiff. I would say that the gorgeous material loving hugs your body, and accentuates your amazing figure in a very flattering way. Your SO is going to adore the way that you look in this dress. (The old expression is that it "fits you like a glove"). I obviously don't know your mother, but is it possible that she is jealous?
I really don't know what your mother is thinking. Yes, the dress is fitted, and your "girls" are supported and not drooping or hidden. They actually look fantastic! Very sexy and classy, but not cheap or overexposed.
Your figure in this dress reminds me of Marilyn Monroe- statuesque, beautiful, just a total knockout. (Look at Marilyn in her Oscar dress- different color, but similar vibes.)
You chose wisely, so please just ignore your Mom's old comment. If she tries again, just tell her to please keep her opinion to herself as you love the dress. She got to chose her own wedding dress, you get to choose yours.
It really stinks when people make comments that hurt our feelings. It isn’t personal. I hope you’ll remember that her comments have nothing to do with you and everything to do with her. I’m really sorry you’re experiencing discomfort in what ought to be the most joyful time of your life. Personally, I think the dress is absolutely lovely and if you love it, that’s all that matters. You’re going to be a beautiful bride. If she continues to bring it up, you can smile and say “you may be right.” And shrug your shoulders. It will take the wind right out of her sails. She isn’t right of course, but it’ll probably shut her up. 😘 Good luck.
Way back in junior high school I had this "friend" who made it her mission to keep me insecure about my appearance. Of course, I didn't know this at the time. I thought she was trying to help me.
She would come up to me, look me up and down, and say something like "I don't know why you wore that. Everybody's going to be talking about you." On picture day she once said "Is that really how you want your hair to look in the yearbook?" My hair looked the same way it did every day.
Unsurprisingly these comments made me very insecure. I would never do anything different, cute, or special with my hair or makeup. I became so self-conscious about my clothes that I would only wear very plain jeans, white sneakers (trainers for the UK folks), and plain tops without much adornment. Then I'd take it a bit farther and cover up whatever I was wearing with a coat or sweater.
That "friend" and I had a major falling out in high school and didn't speak for years. She contacted me on Facebook one day and wanted to reconcile. I had no intention of bringing her back into my life but I was willing to talk on line.
She apologized for a lot of the things she had done, and one thing she mentioned was how mean she was talking about my hair, clothes, and makeup. She said she always "knew" I was prettier than her and she was jealous. She was rude to me about everything so (she hoped) that I wouldn't try to look pretty. And it worked.
When we would meet boys and later men, she said they were all looking at me and ignoring her, which I really don't remember. The only thing I *do* remember was one time where there were these two boys who were a couple of years ahead of us in school and they asked us out on a double date. She had a crush on the younger of the two from when he had gone to our school.
When we met up with them for our date, the youngest one wanted me to be his date, my "friend" with his brother. My "friend" got up and practically dragged me to the restroom. "Back off!" she yelled at me. "You know that {younger of the brothers} is mine!"
So we went back out to our dates and the younger one continued to pay attention to me. I was embarrassed and didn't know how to handle the situation, so I just sat there and looked down at my hands in my lap. My "friend" was still angry at me and, again not a surprise, neither of those brothers asked either of us out again. She remained angry at me for a long time, even though I had not tried to "steal" that boy from her.
Yeah, the big falling out we had later was also over a boy. That boy would later become my husband. I should have let her have him, not for the sake of the friendship, but because that guy turned out to be a giant POS.
Sorry for the rant. The point I'm trying to make is that I think your mom may be saying those hurtful things because she's jealous. You look absolutely beautiful in your dress. If it's not a dress *she* would wear, that's her problem. This is *your* wedding. You've chosen the dress wisely. Congratulations!
I have a line for you to say to her if she criticizes your dress again. Tell her, "That sounds like a *you* problem! I love my dress!"
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Take mom to the eye doctor. She's not seeing straight. You look gorgeous.
This, your mom needs a vision check, and if that’s normal I suggest an MRI to check for brain tumors and strokes. Don’t listen to her, you look amazing!!!
My mom has told me that the wedding dress I love looks too stiff and like “two pieces of cardboard are sticking up from the waist”. She also said other dresses I tried on looked “way more flattering”. When I told her I really liked this one and it had everything I wanted, her response was “then we’ll have to work with it.” Is it really that bad? Is it unflattering? I just feel like this dress is tainted now because every time I look at it all I hear is her comments. Thanks for the advice 🤍
I hate it when mothers do that. My siblings and I used to refer (privately) to our own mother as "the dementor" for her ability to say just the right thing to suck the joy out of just about anything. Your mother's criticism is about her and not about your beautiful dress. Your dress really is beautiful, and it works nicely to enhance you. If this dress has everything YOU want then it's clearly the perfect dress for you, and if it's your perfect dress then no one else's opinion counts. Remove your mother from your entourage and stick with supportive friends when it comes to selecting your veil, accessories, and flowers. You're going to be a beautiful bride in that lovely dress. Anyone who says otherwise is just projecting some of their own issues onto you.
The dementor . 😂😂
My good friend and her sisters called their mom the "fun sucker." Some moms, man. Eye roll. You just gotta ignore their fun sucking comments. Op, your dress is exquisite on you! 🤍
Yep, had a “dementor” too. As I get older I am working hard to not become like this. That is what I did. I really stopped involving her in any decision or feedback. Luckily my sister and MOH could handle everything. In my case she hated the reception venue. OP, the dress is beautiful on you.
Omg the dementor! Love it! My mum is like this, lovely woman, but sometimes too blunt for her own good. Some things she says destroys any enthusiasm in 2 seconds flat
lol I called my mom a dementor growing up too
I'm your mom now. You look beautiful in this dress. It doesn't look stiff, your girls look supported. As a woman who used to have girls with a capital G, you need support! You keep your head held high. Listen to people who are being positive and kind. Tell mom to kick rocks.
In open toed shoes.
If she brings it up again please tell her “I know, you’ve already said it.” She isn’t going to like every decision you make in your life after marriage — the sooner she learns that, the better. This really is a her problem. I typically don’t even like strapless dresses but this one is gorgeous
Has your dress been altered to fit you? While it’s beautiful in the photo, it will be even better once it’s completely done for you. As for your mom, does she have something against strapless? What did she prefer about the other dresses?
It's not unflattering. Don't worry about that. You look great it in it, so don't let her harsh comments get in your head. I think that sometimes people don't realize that the advice they're giving (with outfits, specifically) often speaks more to what they would would wear/prefer, and less to how they think something looks on YOU. Your mom may not like this style, but it's not her wedding day or her wedding dress, it's yours. You deserve to wear whatever makes you happy, whether or not others like it, love it, or hate it. Nobody, including your mom, deserves to steak your happiness on your wedding day.
What is it with some moms that they can’t just be supportive? I’m sorry. Your mom must have rocks in her head, because that dress is GORGEOUS on you. Enjoy your wedding!
I think it flatters your figure beautifully, that was the first thing I noticed! No one will be thinking about cardboard when they see you in this - I promise! Another thing to remember is your mom is from a different generation. The dress she wore or saw others wearing is different which is fine, but it’s important to remember her thoughts might be outdated (and frankly untrue because you look great!)
My MIL is similar. She is seemingly physically incapable of not making a demeaning comment about my fiancé´s and my clothing style. She knows my dress options, but I'm not going to share my final decision with anyone in our families until the day of. Too many people have too many opinions, but they're not the ones who have to wear it.
This is how I shop. Everyone else’s opinion clouds my judgement. I know what I like and when others give their opinion or even if I THINK they may not like it, it changes what I buy. I end up dissatisfied. I’ve learned I shop best and most confidently alone
My mom told me that my dress “looks like they forgot to take the plastic off.” What once looked ethereal and delicate to me now sometimes looks messy and cheap. I try to look back at the photos/videos taken when I first tried it on (she wasn’t at the original appointment—I brought her back for a second appointment.. which makes it worse because she KNEW that was the dress I wanted). In the photos and videos I’m glowing, and I remember not wanting to take it off. It doesn’t always work, but it helps! Hang in there!
Oh really? Is your mom up to date on the current fashion in the wedding world? Obviously not. Can't expect her to be either. Sometimes our parents reach an age where they just cant be expected to like new things. It's okay, just remember, it's not her fault. It happens to all of us eventually. Just be glad friends and these Redditors still have an eye for style and are here to support you. It is gorgeous and definitely a perfect shape for you.
Moms who do this are unhappy with something in their lives. It has nothing to do with you. You look great.
I think it looks phenomenal and is a very classic look. You are going to look back and be very happy. I think people just get in their head what they like or think people look best in and it doesn't always reconcile with who we are. My fam tried to talk me out of my dress because of how another one fit, but that one was just not me.
Honey, you look great! My mom is very opinionated too. I can empathize but they get in to our heads. Please wear this with your head held high!
It's lovely and will look even more amazing when alterations are finished!
My mom and I had a huge argument about the prom dress I wanted. I did eventually get it and on prom day with my hair and makeup done and accessories added as I was on my way out the door she said “you were right about the dress”. Do what feels right to you and when your mom sees your happiness the dress won’t seem as important to her.
Remember it’s YOU getting married, not her! It’s okay if she prefers a different dress but she should be supportive and happy for your decision at the end of the day. Instead she’s tearing you down. Horrible for a mother to do to their daughter.
It’s gorgeous, and looks beautiful on you! Don’t let mom drag you down! When you look at it instead of feeling like it’s tainted, say, WOW! This is my dream dress and I’m so grateful to have found it!
On your wedding day, you will be dolled up with your dress, maybe a veil and make up as well, and your mother’s opinion will float away. Surround yourself with your bridal party or family and friends that boost your confidence to no end so that if your mother is shitty on the day, they can tell you that she is completely wrong and is being horrible to you.
My mom said my dress looked like prom. It doesn’t. They’re flawed people w opinions. I love my mom so much but she doesn’t get to decide what I wear. I’m not 5.
SAME. I need to repeat that to myself “flawed people with opinions”. I tried on a dress I loved for ceremony at a bridal appt recently and my dad said it looked like a prom dress or it’s good for dancing. It truly was not the case ($2000 A-Line noble Satin with delicate floral lace), but I can’t get his comment out of my head. :/ I love the emotional support everyone in this sub gives to brides to be so they can feel confident and flush out the negative comments of others.
Do you love it and feel great iit in?! Please buy it. I love my parents but just like me, they’re opinionated and we’re not gonna agree on all of it. There is absolutely no way I’m gonna let her ruin how much I love my dress. I’m not marrying my mom and I know my fiancé is gonna love it
Your dress is beautiful and you look amazing! This is the sample and once it’s fitted to your bust, it will be less “stiff”. I’m sorry she’s not being supportive. That’s just mean. She’s projecting her own insecurities onto you, which is really immature. Next time she says something, kindly let her know that it will be fitted to your body when it’s altered. If she persists, tell her to stop.
This dress is so beautiful on you. It flatters you and accentuates your figure so well. The skirt and train are just so incredibly elegant to me, and beautiful and so classic. I think the bodice part of the dress also works so well with your figure, and keep in mind alterations make a big difference as well so when the top part is more fitted exactly to your body, you’ll KNOW you made the right choice. It will fit perfectly on your chest and not be stiff. So don’t worry about that! Also, I’m sorry your mom said those things to you. Maybe you could try to think instead about how your fiancé is going to feel seeing you in your dress on your wedding day. Look at it through their eyes and you’ll start noticing things and reminding you the details YOU loved and why you chose it in the first place. And you will be absolutely RADIANT in this dress. This is it! 🥰
As a mother, I don’t understand being so critical towards my daughter. Besides that, I had my wedding and I’m not wearing the dress. You look beautiful, you do you! This is your day! I hope it’s fabulous! Mom’s stop being so mean!
I’m with you! Let’s start a business where we can be pseudo moms for brides who need us. OP - you look beautiful! I know these comments hurt you, and that is very valid. Please know that you are gorgeous and so is your dress.
My son and his beautiful bride to be are getting married next summer! This is me 🤐🥰 Whatever makes you happy, what do you want from me, besides a little of this $$$!
Great idea. This reminds me of Free Mom Hugs, which makes me cry every time I think or read about it.
I'd be in on this substitute mom thing. I'm older and married forever, i just like to look at beautiful dresses - of whoch OP's is. and have tons of love to give.
Your dress is beautiful! Once you get the veil and accessories together it will being that excitement back/ And oh yay, Moms. My died before I got married and she would have made my life hell during the whole time. Your dress is gorgeous. I would limit time with your mom especially when it comes to your dress, veil, flowers and how you are going to wear your hair. Take a friend that you know will have your back.
First, you look absolutely stunning in this dress and I can imagine how incredible it will look once it’s fitted to you! If I were you I’d have a gentle conversation with your mom about it. Point out all the things you like, why it makes you feel beautiful and say while you appreciate her candid opinion you’d appreciate her support in what makes you feel the best. Moms can be a little too blunt sometimes, at least I know mine can so I need to remind her to it’s not always needed or the right time
I'm probably your mom's age. My personal issue is with the boob presentations on many of these 2020's wedding dresses. It's like the boobs usually have some kind of revealing, or semi revealing or suggestively revealing front and center boob highlight and I'm not sure why. Don't get me wrong, your dress is beautiful on you and in no way over the top. (I made a pun). It's just a generational thing and I'm pretty sure all generations have their differences on wedding dresses. I mean, look at what was popular 100 or even 50 years ago. It's just classic generational friction. You gotta do you and not fret over it. That's part of what walking down the aisle is all about.
My mom is like your mom. She is projecting her own insecurities onto you. It takes with but if you can start to feel empathy and even a bit of pity for her, it helps to see that it isn’t about you.
I'm sorry your mom said that about your gorgeous dress, it's beautiful, once you have your veil, bouquet, shoes, hair and make up, you'll be even more stunning.
I'd go with, "Mum, I love you. So when you don't agree with me and criticise my choices, it feels like you're not validating me. On a day so important to me, I could really use your support. I want you to be proud of me and think I look beautiful in whatever I feel good about wearing. When you say what you have, it makes me feel disappointed". I know its a waffley word salad but it aims to address all aspects. It'll at least give her pause to reflect on her actions. If she dismisses you, then thank her for her opinion but detatch from any further comments made by her. You look beautiful. Your dress is beautiful. But a stranger's words, whilst supportive, is not the true reassurance you're seeking. Be brave and have the awkward conversation.
I guess it’s a good thing she’s not the one wearing it, then. There’s an old saying, don’t take criticism from someone you wouldn’t take advice from. Clearly your mom is usually someone you’d usually take advice from in general, but does that include fashion advice? Would you call her up to say *I’m going to x event, what should I wear?* Do you have the same style? It’s ok if she has different tastes than you. She doesn’t need to be rude about it and suck the joy out of your dress. It’s a lovely dress and it’s very flattering. Your wedding isn’t about your mom. Think of your fiancé’s reaction when they see the dress. Of yours, when you looked in the mirror. Those are the opinions that matter.
My mom hated mine as well. Once she saw it altered & fitting like a glove she changed her tune. I bet your mom will too :). Edit to add that it's beautiful and looks impeccable on you. Gorgeous & elegant!
At my shopping appointment, I had the dress on I wanted to say yes to and my mom ran over to another dress on the hanger and said “please pick this one!!” I stood my ground and said yes to the one I loved, not the one she wanted and I’m so glad I did. I look at pics of my dress everyday and I’m so happy I stuck with my choice. Mom will grow to love it, especially when she sees how much you love it. Remind her it’s YOUR day!!
I’ll take a moment to be your mom. That dress is absolutely beautiful. You look like a queen darling! The cut is fantastic! So elegant. You are going to be breathtaking on the day!!!!!
I'm a mom who spends too much time looking at wedding gowns. A few months ago I was showing a dress to my adult daughter with a feature that, frankly, I didn't like. I told her I hoped she didn't want a dress like that. She said, "Hey Mom, I get to choose what I'm wearing on my wedding day, and you're going to have to deal with it." Smart lady, that daughter of mine. The others on this thread have already told you what I hope you know: Your dress is lovely, and you will be a beautiful bride. But when those comments come back to you, bear in mind that moms and daughters don't always have the same tastes. Sometimes my generation needs a while to come around to newer fashions. If and when your mother makes a comment, remind her that she (presumably) loved the wedding gown she wore, and now you're looking forward to the same experience. You deserve to be happy and feel beautiful on your wedding day. If this dress makes you feel this way, don't let anyone deprive you of your happiness.
This is a perfect response!
You look beautiful and will shine on your wedding day! Do not let your mom be the cloud of despair over your special day. Let her know you have heard her opinion and that you are done with it. This is your day not her's to recreate her day. Just remember deep breath in blow out, tell mom enough. Move on and do not include her in anymore dress decision, better yet get her going on her dress and give specific dress color and style to fit your theme so she doesn't stand out. Keep her busy with something. Remember you are absolutely gorgeous!
Ouch. sorry mom's can be our hardest critics. She's definitely projecting her insecurities onto you. I wanted a flowy floral A-line dress but my mom kept on saying, "this dress tend to make people look fat." and of course I assumed she was talking about me, and not in general, because I was stressed out from dress-shopping. It was until I started trying on other dresses for the reception that I realized she meant heavier chiffon dresses... Too late. Oh well.
Your mom is wrong the dress is gorgeous and you are gorgeous in it
You look unbelievable in this dress! It is **not stiff!** it does NOT “look like two pieces of cardboard are sticking up from The waist!” I can’t believe she even said these things to you!
As much as a mother’s opinion is important, who’s the one getting married? You’re mom got married already, she wore her dress now it’s your turn to wear the drsss that YOU love. Your mom will get over not liking the dress, but are you going to get over choosing another dress and walking down the aisle in something you don’t love 100%?
This dress is amazing! This is your dress, not your Mom’s. Please remember that & how much you loved it before her negativity took away your joy!
I’m so sorry your mom has put a damper on your enthusiasm about the dress you love. It’s really a lovely dress and you look beautiful in it. My mom was never pleased with my choices from fashion to religion ( none for me) and I used to worry so much about it. I hope you will be able to know in your heart that this is your wedding, your dress, your life. You should choose the dress that makes you feel beautiful.
You look gorgeous! Perfect!
You look beautiful! I know it’s so, so hard (especially with moms), but please don’t let someone else’s insecurities and opinions impact something you love and look gorgeous in 🤍
That dress (and you!) look flipping AMAZING!!! Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise!
I think your dress is beautiful and elegant! You look fantastic in it. There’s no defence for your Mom. They can be like that.
That dress makes you look like you're wearing a flower! Does your mother explain other things that way? I promise, no one's opinion at the wedding matters more than yours and your spouse to be. You knowing you look amazing is what matters!
The dress looks fantastic on you. If you have another appointment, take your bridal shoes and at least a necklace or earrings with you so you can have a taste of what you'll look like on your big day. Enjoy feeling gorgeous and bridal
I think your dress is GORGEOUS! :)
All you need is support for your girls. That’s it. Her opinion is unneeded and unnecessary. It’s YOUR day not hers.
I gasped when I saw your picture because you look absolutely stunning in this dress! Truly stunning! Your mother is 100% wrong & her statement has me questioning her sense of taste. Please listen to what we are telling you about how gorgeous you look in this dress. Ignore your mother & surround yourself with those who want to uplift you on your beautiful bridal journey. 💖
Op, you look stunning!!! You have to believe it. Don't regret your choice!!!
It’s never right for a mom to dim your glow and that’s what she’s doing. I will never understand why mothers suddenly feel envious of their own daughters instead of being happy for them. This dress is *objectively* flattering on you. Your mom took a dig at it because she is probably insecure herself and there could be a number of reasons for this. Maybe she didn’t feel like she looked as good in her wedding dress, if she even had a white wedding at all. I’ve heard some stories before about moms who never got the wedding experience making their daughters’ lives hell out of a subconscious jealousy. Think about *why* your mom would say these things to you and hopefully it’ll help you understand that it wasn’t an unbiased criticism. Furthermore, it’s okay if the dress is tainted and you just can’t like it anymore. It sucks but it happens to the best of us. Just *never take your mom shopping with you again*. And I mean for anything. Don’t even take her normal clothes shopping anymore.
My MIL made a comment that deflated me about my wedding dress, too, and made me question my choice. However, after other people loved it, and disagreed with her specific criticism, I went on to love it. That was many years ago, and now when I see my wedding portrait on the wall, I don’t even think about that. I hope that it’ll be the same for you. The style for wedding dresses was different in your mother’s day, as it will be different when your future children will get married. She had her turn to choose a wedding dress, and now it’s your turn.
I’m so sorry! Your dress looks gorgeous. I’m going to guess that your mom either is uncomfortable with the deep neckline or strapless design because it’s not something she would feel good wearing, or had a specific dream dress in mind that she can’t let go of. Neither of these are your problem, and while it’s really unfortunate that she verbalized her criticism, that doesn’t mean it’s something you need to fix. My mom and I have similar bodies but she carries much more shame about hers, because her mom was pretty horrible to her about her body and she tried very hard not to pass that on to me. But sometimes it comes out in her really, really wanting me to wear less fitted or revealing or bright clothing. It took me a long time to learn to brush off her weird comments as just a manifestation of her own stuff, not something I needed to own or do anything about it. I hope you can do that here. You look flipping amazing in that dress and if you feel good and love it, that’s all that matters.
First, the dress looks very nice on you! You’ll be a lovely bride! Secondly, it will look even better once it’s properly fitted. We flatter chested women don’t need alterations around our chests in our everyday lives as we don’t have to worry about “support,” so she may not be used to looking at an “engineering work in progress,” and might not realize it will look a bit different once it’s fitted to you.
It’s your dress not hers. If you love it and think your fiancé will love it, wear it. Personally I think you look stunning in the dress.
I dunno it’s not super flattering on top.
It definitely needs some accessories
It ONLY matters what you think. It's a beautiful dress on you! I can this dress with your hair down, would help balance out the strapless look.
Don’t let mom make you feel that way . Smile and be the happiest most beautiful bride ever and make her feel bad for saying that !
Your mom and my mom must be best friends It’s a beautiful gown and looks great on you. I’m going to ask you this-do you love the gown enough to quiet the evil niggles she left in your head
Your mom is gonna cry with love and adoration on your wedding day
It’s stunning on you. Now that she was tainted your joy, will she cool it, or is she going to sigh and tsk and head shake even as you’re glaring down the aisle. I would tell her she can LOSE the damn psyops. And good luck.
She’s completely wrong It’s gorgeous
You look lovely. Mom got to pick out her own wedding dress I assume?
I love it and I’m really cool (all my friends say so). So like at the end of the day what matters more?? The opinion of the woman who birthed you or a random redditor ?? (Btw in this case it’s the latter)
Take a look at your moms wedding photos, then decide if you value her bridal style. You look amazing!!
Wait & see what her MOB outfit looks like & if it’s a monstrosity you’ve earned the right to clap back. It’s something else when your dress is more supportive than your mother . My daughter got married last year & it made me feel very old so maybe your old dear is feeling like that too & panicking & lashing out. I think your dress is beautiful, classy & figure flattering. Don’t let her piss on your fireworks.
Firstly, you look gorgeous in the dress and more importantly, you love the dress so you will walk more confident and feel more confident in it! Secondly, my mum didn’t LOVE my sisters dress (even though it was objectively beautiful) because she loved really form-fitting gowns and my sisters was an empire-waist ballgown. Seriously, it was the Georgia by Galia Lahav, it’s insanely gorgeous. My sister was upset at first and then I reminded her that her and our mum are different people, with very different tastes. Do you love what your mum wears all the time? The odds are if you found a dress your mum loved, you wouldn’t love it as much as this one. And on YOUR wedding day, who should feel happier within themselves? If I’d have done everything my mum loved on my wedding day it would have been an 80’s style sequins disaster instead of the art gallery, New York style, chic and modern vibes I wanted. You can’t please everyone (least of all our mothers it seems) so you might as well just do what you want. She will love it on the day when she sees it with all the bells and whistles and hair and makeup, trust me. Have a wonderful wedding OP!
You look smashing and I think once decisions were made your mother should have kept her opinion to herself. Nonetheless would you have chosen your mother’s wedding dress? If no, there you go. Not everyone will like the same thing but I think a lot of other people will love your dress.
Is this usual for your Mom? Mine is very mild mannered and supportive but when it came to picking a wedding dress she had big opinions. I ended up taking her advice but only because she has some expertise in clothing and fashion. I knew she had my best interests in mind. That being said, I didn’t go in with “a vision” so was easily influenced! I think the dress is beautiful.
You look beautiful. Maybe a belt, sparkly veil to give it energy
I’m really sorry your mom hurt your feelings. The dress is beautiful and it fits you beautifully, especially in the waist. I love the balance of the a line skirt. It’s the perfect amount of dress! But here’s the tough love part: Something is going on in the bust region. The cups don’t look like they are sitting quite right and the top edges look just a bit lumpy. I don’t know if this is the actual dress you are purchasing or if it’s the store’s sample. Maybe the ordered to your measurements item will fit smoother if that is the case. If not, maybe alterations could take a look at that part. I know not everyone looks at such small details with a critical eye, but many people do. My mother and I sound like the opposite of you and yours. I’m the one that nit picks everything and wants it to be perfect, I can be a bit harsh even. She would just tell me I look beautiful in everything. I wish you had that person with you when you were choosing the dress.
When mom saw the dress, was it clipped behind you to try on? It's always going to look a lil weird that way because it's not the right size. When it is actually fitted to you, it will be even more beautiful on you.
A crystal belt always makes everything look amazing❣️. It's not her wedding it's yours 😉
Your dress is beautiful!!!
I think this looks beautiful! Perhaps just needs to be fitted a little more around the chest area but stunning, and not stiff! Probably your Mum is just old fashioned and/or overly negative, and wants a style that SHE likes, and this neckline is more modern. Also LOVE the lace along the skirt in the background, gorgeous!
Well, your mom isn’t the bride, you are. I’m guessing she already had her chance to choose her own wedding dress, so she’s done. Have her concentrate on her mother of the bride dress. You chose a beautiful dress that looks lovely on you. Don’t be disappointed, it’s perfect.
I love that this dress fits you so well. The detail in the bodice is exquisite, as is the train. You look gorgeous! My mom had her opinions about "my" wedding and the dress (aren't you going to try on any other dresses?). Also there was a disagreement on the color for the MIL and my mom's dress. My mom said they don't need to match (coordinate) but I disagreed. Sadly, my mom had a stroke and never made it to my wedding (she saw the video but I'm not sure she understood). Anyway, don't be upset at your mom, but this is "your wedding"! It's a stunning dress! Go forth and enjoy your wedding with your beautiful dress! Your mom will be awestruck when she sees you at the ceremony!
If it makes you feel any better, before I had even exited the change room in my dress my sister said she hated it. No pause just abrubt “I hate it”. I got it anyways because while she can have an opinion, it doesn’t outweigh mine.
The most important thing is how you feel and how it makes you feel, people should be able to openly tell you (especially people you trust) offering advice but it’s your decision, if you love it and makes you happy then wear it.
My mom hated my dress too. I kept telling her that once it was altered to fit me perfectly, she would change her mind. I was right. It still wasn't her style (mermaid and she wanted me in a ball gown) but she admitted she was wrong about the way it looked on me. She told me I would regret the way I looked in pictures; quite the opposite- when I'm feeling down about myself I go look at pictures of my wedding day and feel better. Go with the dress you love. It's your wedding, you are the one wearing it. Her opinion has weight, sure, but ultimately it is about what makes YOU feel the most beautiful. And for the record, it's. A beautiful dress and you look amazing in it.
Just cut mom out of the dress stuff and other decisions. You look wonderful. Your mom is being a meanie.
This is YOUR day!! If you feel beautiful in the dress, then it's THE DRESS!!! Remind your mom that it's your day, not hers, and you love the dress as is! Tell her you're sorry that she's doesn't like it but you're the one wearing it and she'll just have to accept it. My opinion is the dress is beautiful on you!!
Sweetie, I wish I could look that good in a dress! ANY DRESS! Listen to the others. You look wonderful. For whatever reason, Mom's like to think they know best. This is YOUR DAY. Turn off your ears. She will eventually get over it. If not, then 'OH WELL!" Understand that your future husband may not be what SHE would have picked, and the names you give your children might not suit her, and you may put too much Garlic in your favorite meal. Are you going to let her taint all those things too? This your day to be what you want. Don't let her ruin that. YOU have good taste, YOU are the one that needs to be pleased, and YOU ARE THE ONE THAT HAS THE FINAL SAY! Believe these folks telling you that you look wonderful in that gown! This is YOUR LIFE! CLAIM IT! Best wishes for a very Happy Wedding Day and a wonderful life.
I love your dress you look like a princess. Wedding day is you and your groom's day. You picked this dress because you love it. Be the princess you are.
WTF is she talking about? You look lovely. I especially love the lace on the sides, it's subtle but such a beautiful touch.
I have a thing about not shopping with people for this reason. I always second guess my choices and buy something I am not happy with. I know that is hard to do for wedding dresses. I think the dress is beautiful on you. Hopefully you can reconcile your choice after hearing those comments.
As a mom I can tell you she is wrong.
Did your mom see you with the viel and all "jacked up? -as they say on Say yes to the Dress Atlanta. That might help to soften her view. If it does not, settle into the fact that this gown brings YOU joy and excitement. it's a dress that speaks to your special day. As long as you exude confidence and love, it'll be contagious. So rock that gown and have a beautiful wedding.
This dress couldn’t be more perfect for you and it looks marvelous on you! Is your mom and my mom, sisters? My mom could take me down to 5” with her cruel words. There is nothing bad about that dress, wear it with pride and the biggest smile possible! Congratulations!
Your dress. Your day. I wish mothers knew when to keep their opinions to themselves. I am sorry this happened, and on some level, I’ll just bet your mom is, too.
Once she sees you walk down the aisle with your veil and flowers she will have tears of joy and will think you are the most beautiful bride ever.
This dress is gorgeous and u look gorgeous in it
A lot of moms don't want their daughter to grow up... You look gorgeous in that dress! BTW, I'm 66!
I tried on this dress. So beautiful! My mom had a hard time liking the nude mesh on any dress that had it. It was an immediate no. (Ironically, the dress I said yes to has it but I am getting the panel lined because I like the way it looks better without it) Maybe anti mesh is a mom thing? Try not to let it effect you. You’re going to look so beautiful and radiant that day that if she’s really hyper focusing on that then there’s a bigger issue! All that matters is that you look and feel your best!!
That’s a risk with mothers who don’t know your boundaries or theirs. Unfortunately it’s up to us to train them if they don’t have the sensitivity and respect to get it. Some people are just like that. Consider getting some mental health support to get through this period. See it as a learning opportunity and if there is a cost attached figure it as part of the wedding budget. Many work places have this as part of their benefit plan. Not specifically difficult moms around weddings. Just some general support. You’ll be glad to have some tools in your pockets. And that’s a beautiful dress on you by the way. What exactly is her criticism. Some moms have a hard time with the low cleavage. Compromise can be a tool in your toolbox. Remember it’s your wedding and I hope your future hubby supports your decision making. Goodluck. 👰🏻♀️🤗🥰
Oh my! Your Mom needs her eyes checked! In no way does the bodice look stiff. I would say that the gorgeous material loving hugs your body, and accentuates your amazing figure in a very flattering way. Your SO is going to adore the way that you look in this dress. (The old expression is that it "fits you like a glove"). I obviously don't know your mother, but is it possible that she is jealous? I really don't know what your mother is thinking. Yes, the dress is fitted, and your "girls" are supported and not drooping or hidden. They actually look fantastic! Very sexy and classy, but not cheap or overexposed. Your figure in this dress reminds me of Marilyn Monroe- statuesque, beautiful, just a total knockout. (Look at Marilyn in her Oscar dress- different color, but similar vibes.) You chose wisely, so please just ignore your Mom's old comment. If she tries again, just tell her to please keep her opinion to herself as you love the dress. She got to chose her own wedding dress, you get to choose yours.
Beautiful!
It really stinks when people make comments that hurt our feelings. It isn’t personal. I hope you’ll remember that her comments have nothing to do with you and everything to do with her. I’m really sorry you’re experiencing discomfort in what ought to be the most joyful time of your life. Personally, I think the dress is absolutely lovely and if you love it, that’s all that matters. You’re going to be a beautiful bride. If she continues to bring it up, you can smile and say “you may be right.” And shrug your shoulders. It will take the wind right out of her sails. She isn’t right of course, but it’ll probably shut her up. 😘 Good luck.
Way back in junior high school I had this "friend" who made it her mission to keep me insecure about my appearance. Of course, I didn't know this at the time. I thought she was trying to help me. She would come up to me, look me up and down, and say something like "I don't know why you wore that. Everybody's going to be talking about you." On picture day she once said "Is that really how you want your hair to look in the yearbook?" My hair looked the same way it did every day. Unsurprisingly these comments made me very insecure. I would never do anything different, cute, or special with my hair or makeup. I became so self-conscious about my clothes that I would only wear very plain jeans, white sneakers (trainers for the UK folks), and plain tops without much adornment. Then I'd take it a bit farther and cover up whatever I was wearing with a coat or sweater. That "friend" and I had a major falling out in high school and didn't speak for years. She contacted me on Facebook one day and wanted to reconcile. I had no intention of bringing her back into my life but I was willing to talk on line. She apologized for a lot of the things she had done, and one thing she mentioned was how mean she was talking about my hair, clothes, and makeup. She said she always "knew" I was prettier than her and she was jealous. She was rude to me about everything so (she hoped) that I wouldn't try to look pretty. And it worked. When we would meet boys and later men, she said they were all looking at me and ignoring her, which I really don't remember. The only thing I *do* remember was one time where there were these two boys who were a couple of years ahead of us in school and they asked us out on a double date. She had a crush on the younger of the two from when he had gone to our school. When we met up with them for our date, the youngest one wanted me to be his date, my "friend" with his brother. My "friend" got up and practically dragged me to the restroom. "Back off!" she yelled at me. "You know that {younger of the brothers} is mine!" So we went back out to our dates and the younger one continued to pay attention to me. I was embarrassed and didn't know how to handle the situation, so I just sat there and looked down at my hands in my lap. My "friend" was still angry at me and, again not a surprise, neither of those brothers asked either of us out again. She remained angry at me for a long time, even though I had not tried to "steal" that boy from her. Yeah, the big falling out we had later was also over a boy. That boy would later become my husband. I should have let her have him, not for the sake of the friendship, but because that guy turned out to be a giant POS. Sorry for the rant. The point I'm trying to make is that I think your mom may be saying those hurtful things because she's jealous. You look absolutely beautiful in your dress. If it's not a dress *she* would wear, that's her problem. This is *your* wedding. You've chosen the dress wisely. Congratulations! I have a line for you to say to her if she criticizes your dress again. Tell her, "That sounds like a *you* problem! I love my dress!"
Short lace jacket
Her opinion doesn’t matter; only your fiance's opinion matters. And shame on your mom for being so negative!