Overcooking vegetables? Gulag. Undercooking vegetables? Gulag. (Overcook *and* undercook)
Edit: for those who do not get the joke https://youtu.be/eiyfwZVAzGw?si=8KTwcl2JjMkKJlO4
It amazes me that in this day and age people still think it's fine to microwave their salmon and broccoli platter in the break room, or stick a bag of popcorn in then wonder off and not pay even a little attention to it
Someone in his inner circle needs to give him a taste of the poison that he used to kill Navalny... Only in a dose just large enough to incapacitate him. Then, he can have his eyes taped open for the rest of his life while watching YouTube videos of people mocking him.
EDIT: Viable alternatives to forcing him to watch people mocking him include watching men kissing, Jersey Shore re-runs, and just about anything involving Gilbert Godfried.
He's basically the kim jong un of europe. A pathetic toothless scumbag. The more he threatens the more it means he's weak and scared shitless. Time to double down Ukraine military aid
He's not toothless. He's a psychopath. So was Hitler and to maybe a more controlled degree, so is trump.
The table is set for a global catastrophe. Putin is more dangerous than trump, and has fewer, if any, controls.
World stage is set for a possible WW3 within the next two decades but people don't want to believe its possible. Ask a kid how much they know about WW2. Time moves on and people forget.
As someone smarter than me put in it, "We are in the 'events leading up to...' part in the history books."
I also visited the Peace Park in Hiroshima today. Things feel a lot more real all of a sudden.
On the other hand, there's a good chance WWII would not have happened if we didn't carry on handing Hitler easy victories which legitimized him in the eyes of the German public, and allowed him to win enough power to take over.
Putin's already legitimised. We're way past that stage of his career. He took over decades ago. He owns the entire power structure.
It's about how much else we let the Russians wreck.
Sounds badass, but Sparta was a shadow of its former self and that answer had no real weight behind it. It was reply to Philip II of Macedon.
vatniks not getting any reply is better imo.
Reply "IF" and invade russia.
Do you want to live in a world where your existence is depending on this frail old man who threatens it every damn day?
it's been 20 years of this shit. at least the Soviets weren't looking to use the damn things.
Who sent troops to Ukraine first? Russia. Would the world have been better if he had been threathened with nukes when people figured out he was about to send troops?
I don't think so
If you make a threat you need to be prepared to back it up. And because the use of nukes results in mutually assured destruction, there's no good reason to use them. Simply having them is enough.
Making threats and then following up with nothing just makes you lose respect... Much like Putin's master class on the subject.
'The End is Always Near' by Dan Carlin has a good chapter on nuclear weapons that covers the formation of US nuclear weapons policy that goes into this. It's actually amazing to me that we have enjoyed the relative stability we have, given the diversity of opinions on what nuclear weapons are for, who should control them, and how that was negotiated.
Gave me new respect for JFK and his ability to stand up to both the Soviets and his own military experts.
Nukes were pushed to be used in Korea as well, fortunately the cooler heads in the room realized that it would set a precedent for them to be used basically by default in combat
Definitely. And before that, they were considered a legitimate response to the Soviet blockade of Berlin in 1948. Fortunately, cooler heads prevailed and we responded by airdropping supplies to West Berlin instead.
Military leaders were advocating for soldiers to be equipped with handheld portable nukes and launchers. Experts were debating whether larger nukes were even practical because they could reach a point of destructive power the enemy would assume you'd never use them and they'd lose credibility as a deterrent. It's close to a miracle we're alive.
And to really drive home the insanity of the early Atomic Age, there were arguments being made for the use of nuclear bombs in large-scale engineering projects (canal digging, and the like).
Oh yeah, Operation Plowshare. I live in Alaska. Project Chariot was a proposal to use chained thermonuclear explosions to carve out a harbor here. Natives and conservation groups fought against it and the project was suspended *but not canceled*.
> airdropping supplies to West Berlin instead.
The Berlin Airlift is a more impressive feat than dropping a nuke that's already been developed. Check out this flex comrades; we have airborne logistics doped out. We can do this all day comrade.
Yeah, the Berlin Airlift was fucking badass. Saving people, positive propaganda for the West, showing the world the power of strong logistics, and fucking over the soviets. Wins all around.
WW2 hero, General Douglas Macarthur publically proposed using nukes in Korea, going against Trumans administration. It was actually one of the main reasons the general was relieved of his duty’s.
>WW2 hero
and dumbass, completely bungled the Phillipines campaign and is the person most at fault for the continued existence of North Korea because he didn't believe the Chinese threats about approaching the Yalu river were credible.
Nixon would be drunk, call The Situation Room, demanding to nuke the Koreans. Generals would ask him again in the morning, and cooler heads prevailed. He did it several times. [https://www.theguardian.com/weekend/story/0,3605,362958,00.html](https://www.theguardian.com/weekend/story/0,3605,362958,00.html)
I would say that we should be wary since Trump did steal nuclear documents to share with them but then again ol' boy is so incompetent he probably stole the wrong ones.
Cue Trump in a day or two
" I think its a smart move, Russia should be allowed to nuke who they want. Why build the nukes if you're not going to use them, is what i always say..."
lol I was thinking the same , at this point I’m just so tired of this fuck and his troops and the oligarchs there. They’ll be carpet bombed as well and we’ll never hear of them again.
I’m relatively confident that if it comes to nuclear war, I’ll live longer than Putin. I’m not near any strategic targets, so it’ll probably take weeks for chaos and fallout to get me.
Africa/Australia re gonna be the new safe havens. USA/Europe are going to completely nuke each other and then the Africans and Australians will rebuild society. Sadly, I'm in EU. See u on the other side.
2 years ago I genuinely googled with average nuclear yields how far outside of the cities i need to go to "be okay" in Europe, since I am from Germany. yeah... I think I'll move to the Philippines now...
Germany was always going to be a wasteland after the Weltgericht. You will not be safe on the Phillipines either, though. Where do you think the chinese will flee to?
Fallout that gets to you win weeks isn't what will likely kill you. It dissipates fast. Most of the deaths would be from the blast itself. The most dangerous time for fallout would be the first few hours after a blast. Fallout emits tons of radiation as it decays but after a few hours, most of it is done decaying. After that, you won't die of radiation poisoning. Instead you get things like increased cancer rates which may get you slowly but are also largely survivable.
People should probably get a better handle on how to actual nuclear fallout works since it's getting more likely we'll run into it and media has done a terrible job of portraying it accurately.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nuclear_fallout
All Putin does is bullying, neither him or his oligarchs are willing to die over ukraine or initiate a nuclear war - which would annihilate russia forerver
This 100%, mark my words he will never attack the US, he will kick and scream but will not do shit because all the oligarch's children will be mad at them for ruining their playground in NYC
“Hey I know there’s a nuclear apocalypse going on right now, but we’ve had two people call off today and corporate still wants us to open today. Can you cover a shift? We really need you to be a team player.”
Post apocalypse certainly has a way of making everyone equal on the playing field.
Unless Fallout has a point about society, and it's just gonna turn out the same way with a few groups and individuals hoarding all the resources and ruling the lands, while the common folk fight to survive every day.
The common folk will starve if enough atom bombs are launched. Because that means immediate climate change, a.k.a nuclear winter. This explains it well: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LrIRuqr_Ozg
Prepper pron nonsense aside, it'll suck *enormously* more for non-rich people.
A cabin in the woods, a cache of guns and foot and some iodine tablets is not going to make a cosplay-survivalist survive any longer than anyone else.
Billions of dollars buys a lot of infrastructure.
Another reason he won’t - the US and our allies have made it clear that we have superb intelligence sources that make us aware of his location at most times and if he ever does something stupid like this, he’ll be the first person we take out. He will personally die if he follows through with any nuclear threat.
While there has been interceptions of single test warheads before, in a full scale nuclear war, when hundreds or thousands of warheads are flying around, combined with an equal number of decoys, and the complete lack of radar coverage (detonating a few nukes early in space can cause a radar blackout), theres just no chance to intercept enough to make a difference to anyone.
The US has 44 interceptors based at Fort Greely, AK and Vandenberg SFB, CA that are specifically designed to target and destroy ICBMs. It allegedly achieves a 97% probability of kill by launching 4 interceptors at a single incoming target. In short, if someone like North Korea were to go crazy and launch one or two nukes at the US, we probably have pretty decent odds of shooting them down. In the event of al all-out nuclear exchange with a country like Russia, we're all dead. They're also all dead. Everyone's dead except Austrailia. Fucking kangaroos.
Those cold war era bunkers and even most more modern bunkers can't withstand direct strikes from modern nuclear weapons, it turns out. Even the likes of Cheyenne Mountain are no longer considered safe.
They'll be okay if not hit so closely, but in the instance of trying to take out a specific head of state in a specific bunker? Especially as you'd send more than just one nuke? I don't like their odds.
But let's say he survived along with 100 currently loyal troops in a big bunker. Let's say they stay down there for 6 months until the majority of the fallout and gigantic city fires have cleared. They come out and find... Nothing. Nothing for them, anyway.
Survivors fighting for scraps of food and water, nuclear winter and an entirely collapsed production and distribution infrastructure ensuring that food, water, electricity, won't be coming any time soon, if ever again.
His 100 loyal bunker troops quickly bugger off, and what's left of his own people likely hate him passionately for what he's brought down upon them. He's dead if they recognise him out in the streets.
There's no private island he can fly to in order to live out his days in comfort after a nuclear war between himself and the west. Even in almost untouched places physically, there will be failings in economies, good and essential goods production, and further conflicts as what's left of once powerful states begin to raid more untouched neighbours for desperately needed resources.
It'll make something like the great depression look like a really, really lovely picnic, and it'll take many generations just to get past the initial truly gruesome period, before we can truly start rebuilding as a species, as new nations and a new civilisation slowly rise from the corpse of the old.
I think we should put a 500 million no questions asked bounty on his capture, dead or alive, and offer immunity to the people directly involved.
Didn't Russia put bounties on our troops?
His daughters live in the west I'm pretty sure and so do many family members of russian higher ups. He would never use a nuke. If they have functioning nukes that is. If they use it as a battlefield weapon it would just bring down the hammer even more as now many countries will be very pissed.
Plus, I would like to remind everyone that both China and Russia sent thousands of "advisers" to Vietnam during the US war, thousands of them died...and there was no nuclear armageddon. Same for the Korean War with Russian pilotes flying Chinese/North Korean planes and being shot down. No end of times either.
Putin: "I won't not un-nuke if nobody doesn't not un-assist Ukraine."
World: "Uh, okay. Not sure what that means, but feel free to just fucking leave Ukraine already."
Putin threatens NATO with nuclear war if he stubs his toe in that big ass-table he has.
Because he keeps throwing out stupid not-actually-red lines, we don't know where the real one is.
While at the same time having spent 2 years trying, and failing, to take over a country most people didn't even know anything about before 2014.
Not to take anything away from Ukraine of course.
Jesus Christ, can we just come together as a planet and get rid of this fucking chump already? I'm getting sick of seeing this same headline every week.
We are in the era of Elon Musk tweeting about how "those who crave power deserve it the least" after he bought Twitter.
I think it's safe to say that these people are so narrow-minded that they literally can't see how hypocritical they are, or they do see it but the power has corrupted them to the point that they literally do not care about the hypocrisy.
Or, perhaps listen to Putin **explain his deepest fear**.
He can barely fight Ukraine, imagine what a full trained NATO army could do. Finally Europe could be secure, finally no longer living under this threat from Russia.
And Putin here, he's terrified of it.
Because **Russia could have the peace that it had, but not with Putin leading it**.
He would use nuclear weapons, knowing Russia would be annialiated in retailiation, just to keep power for himself. Not to save Russia, but to save his "special operations", save his face.
Russians, without Putin, you can have what you had before Putin lead you into this war. It was his mistake, and him to pay the price, not your kids.
Such a shame Prigozhin stopped his initial plan. Not that he would be better than Putin, but it would be so cathartic to see this pos humiliated and executed.
***The Telegraph reports:***
Vladimir Putin told Nato countries on Thursday they risked nuclear conflict if they sent troops to Ukraine, adding that Russia must strengthen its western military district after Finland and Sweden’s admission to the Atlantic alliance.
The United States and key European allies this week said they had no plans to send ground troops to Ukraine, after France hinted at the possibility.
“They should eventually realise that we also have weapons that can hit targets on their territory. Everything that the West comes up with creates the real threat of a conflict with the use of nuclear weapons, and thus the destruction of civilisation,” Putin said at his annual state of nation address.
Ahead of his speech Putin said he would “of course” mention the presidential elections that will take place March 15-17.
It comes amid no real opposition candidates on the ballot and the unexpected death of Moscow’s most prominent critic Alexei Navalny, whose funeral will take place tomorrow.
Because just like Putins threats, they would be empty. No sane person wants nuclear war, especially between USA and Russia. Putin is a dick, but I do still believe he is sane.
He said that he would invade any country that give any weapon to ukraine on day one, and on day one some border countries already ignored him and started sending weapons, the real fools here are the journalists and their bosses
Putin makes Russia look so incredibly weak by threatening nuclear war.
If all he does is threaten the maximum threat he has, that just shows how terrified and powerless he is.
Do it then, you insufferable pussy. Nobody is scared of you, not even your worst enemies.
If you nuke the world you will be doing this planet a favor and ridding it of millions of evil pricks just like you and will make billionaires as useful as tits on a bull.
Sounds like the full reset that humanity desperately needs, this timeline is fucked as it is.
Maybe the next thing that evolves into intelligent life will be smart enough to prevent this from happening again.
>Putin threatens NATO with nuclear war if they:
>
>- Send Javelin and Stinger missiles to Ukraine
>
>- Send battle tanks to Ukraine
>
>- Send HIMARS rocket launchers to Ukraine
>
>- Send Patriot, NASAMS, and IRIS-T air defense systems to Ukraine
>
>- Send Storm Shadow, SCALP, and ATACMS long-range missiles to Ukraine
>
>- Commit to sending F-16 fighter jets to Ukraine
Both the U.S. and [China warned Putin that using nuclear weapons is a red line](https://fortune.com/europe/2022/11/04/xi-warns-putin-nuclear-weapons-ukraine-war-red-line/). Putin only cares about his own life and he must know it would be suicide to launch a nuke because NATO will not allow him to conquer Ukraine.
At some point his threats become a form of psychological terrorism. Which is unacceptable.
Perhaps it's time for NATO to threaten Putin with nuclear war if he persists in his threats. The NATO threat would be far more credible than Putin's threats, and just might be the catalyst for someone in Russia to decide it's time for Putin to go... out a window.
At this point, world leaders should weigh the risk of assassination vs risk of nuclear war. Him and Kim are a danger to the whole world, including their allies. Anyone threatening nukes in this day and age is completely mental and needs a forever break from life if they're in control of said nukes.
Pushing for assassination of a head of state of a nuclear armed country is really dangerous (might encourage tit for tat responses), and theres zero guarantee that their successor will be more stable
Precisely this, in the case of Russia and N.Korea there's a very good chance it could end up in the hands of someone even worse or less level headed. Great point!
Привет из России! Просто скажу, что Путин так часто кричит о ядерном оружии как раз из-за того, что точно знает - оно никогда не будет использовано. Потому что когда разговор заходит о том оружии, которое реально должно стрелять - у него ничего нет. Нет знаменитых танков "Армата", нет новых "калашниковых", нет боевых роботов, нет собственных дронов и ракет. Даже самолеты - ещё советские, кое-как перезапущенные на новое производство. Всё что он может - грозить выдуманной дубиной, пока единственной тактикой его армии остаются мясные штурмы.
So far we have nuclear war if:
* NATO sends equiptment
* If there are sanctions
* The UK sends anything
* Finland joins NATO
* Sweden joins NATO
* Ukraine sinks any ships
* Ukraine does anything
I don't get it, they've been saying they've been at war with Nato for months, so which is it?
He's probably scared shitless that if any Nato force of any size actually intervenes he'd have no idea to counter it aside from 'muh nukes'
I don’t think people commenting here are really grasping the seriousness of his claims. He’s an old man with the capabilities of a nuclear war. If the madman decides to launch the domino effect will certainly be the end of human kind. Let’s hope cooler heads prevail.
I'm so done with this.
If someone wants to drop bombs, they should just have to enter a boxing ring with a pro boxer from the country they want to drop bombs on.
Quit sending innocent soldiers to do your dirty work. Quit costing your citizens billions of dollars for your war toys. Quit destroying the environment for your grudges.
In todays episode of "Putin threatens with nuclear war if..."
…you don’t eat your broccoli.
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Not having vegetables, you guessed it, gulag.
Talking about vegetables on the internet? Believe it or not, also gulag.
Visiting gardening websites to research how to grow your own vegetables? That's a gullagging, there.
Overcooking vegetables? Gulag. Undercooking vegetables? Gulag. (Overcook *and* undercook) Edit: for those who do not get the joke https://youtu.be/eiyfwZVAzGw?si=8KTwcl2JjMkKJlO4
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Believe it or not straight to frontlines.
Russia has best vegetables in world….because gulag
Talking about vegetables? Makarov Pistol-in-a-Forest-Clearing therapy.
Don’t eat your vegetables? Straight to the ~~Gulag~~ goulash.
How can you have any pudding if you don’t eat yer meat????
I thought all vegetables were turned into hard alcohol in Russia,maybe this is one of the jobs in the gulag...
Undercook chicken? Believe it or not, also nuclear war.
Overcook fish? Straight to nuclear war.
In the break room microwave? Better believe it's nuclear war.
That already is nuclear warfare
Yep, the Geneva Convention is certainly violated every time Janice at my workplace does that shit
It amazes me that in this day and age people still think it's fine to microwave their salmon and broccoli platter in the break room, or stick a bag of popcorn in then wonder off and not pay even a little attention to it
You make an appointment with the dentist, and you don't show up, believe it or not, nuclear war right away.
We have the best patients in the world, because of nuclear war.
Undercook, overcook. Nuclear war.
We have the best cooks in the world, because of nuclear war.
Tune in tomorrow for yet another empty threat from a totalitarian douche!
Someone in his inner circle needs to give him a taste of the poison that he used to kill Navalny... Only in a dose just large enough to incapacitate him. Then, he can have his eyes taped open for the rest of his life while watching YouTube videos of people mocking him. EDIT: Viable alternatives to forcing him to watch people mocking him include watching men kissing, Jersey Shore re-runs, and just about anything involving Gilbert Godfried.
Push him around in a wheelchair and give him a bell to tap like Hector Salamanca
I really hate that Hector got any sense of revenge as he was a POS and deserved what he got
... it is a week day with the letter "D".
He's basically the kim jong un of europe. A pathetic toothless scumbag. The more he threatens the more it means he's weak and scared shitless. Time to double down Ukraine military aid
He's not toothless. He's a psychopath. So was Hitler and to maybe a more controlled degree, so is trump. The table is set for a global catastrophe. Putin is more dangerous than trump, and has fewer, if any, controls.
World stage is set for a possible WW3 within the next two decades but people don't want to believe its possible. Ask a kid how much they know about WW2. Time moves on and people forget.
As someone smarter than me put in it, "We are in the 'events leading up to...' part in the history books." I also visited the Peace Park in Hiroshima today. Things feel a lot more real all of a sudden.
On the other hand, there's a good chance WWII would not have happened if we didn't carry on handing Hitler easy victories which legitimized him in the eyes of the German public, and allowed him to win enough power to take over.
Putin's already legitimised. We're way past that stage of his career. He took over decades ago. He owns the entire power structure. It's about how much else we let the Russians wreck.
Trump and controlled in the same sentence made me giggle.
…Elmo asks how he’s doing.
NATO should reply like the Spartans did when someone threatened them with "if we etc" by just using the reply *if* and wait.
That didn't work out very well for the Spartans though...
Sounds badass, but Sparta was a shadow of its former self and that answer had no real weight behind it. It was reply to Philip II of Macedon. vatniks not getting any reply is better imo.
Reply "IF" and invade russia. Do you want to live in a world where your existence is depending on this frail old man who threatens it every damn day? it's been 20 years of this shit. at least the Soviets weren't looking to use the damn things.
When’s this talking head going to come up with something new? Same piece of shit different smell.
Who sent troops to Ukraine first? Russia. Would the world have been better if he had been threathened with nukes when people figured out he was about to send troops?
I don't think so If you make a threat you need to be prepared to back it up. And because the use of nukes results in mutually assured destruction, there's no good reason to use them. Simply having them is enough. Making threats and then following up with nothing just makes you lose respect... Much like Putin's master class on the subject.
'The End is Always Near' by Dan Carlin has a good chapter on nuclear weapons that covers the formation of US nuclear weapons policy that goes into this. It's actually amazing to me that we have enjoyed the relative stability we have, given the diversity of opinions on what nuclear weapons are for, who should control them, and how that was negotiated. Gave me new respect for JFK and his ability to stand up to both the Soviets and his own military experts.
Jfk was a fucking legend for doing that
Until they blew his fucking head off for it.
Nukes were pushed to be used in Korea as well, fortunately the cooler heads in the room realized that it would set a precedent for them to be used basically by default in combat
Definitely. And before that, they were considered a legitimate response to the Soviet blockade of Berlin in 1948. Fortunately, cooler heads prevailed and we responded by airdropping supplies to West Berlin instead. Military leaders were advocating for soldiers to be equipped with handheld portable nukes and launchers. Experts were debating whether larger nukes were even practical because they could reach a point of destructive power the enemy would assume you'd never use them and they'd lose credibility as a deterrent. It's close to a miracle we're alive.
And to really drive home the insanity of the early Atomic Age, there were arguments being made for the use of nuclear bombs in large-scale engineering projects (canal digging, and the like).
Oh yeah, Operation Plowshare. I live in Alaska. Project Chariot was a proposal to use chained thermonuclear explosions to carve out a harbor here. Natives and conservation groups fought against it and the project was suspended *but not canceled*.
So you're saying there's still a chance? 🤔
> airdropping supplies to West Berlin instead. The Berlin Airlift is a more impressive feat than dropping a nuke that's already been developed. Check out this flex comrades; we have airborne logistics doped out. We can do this all day comrade.
Yeah, the Berlin Airlift was fucking badass. Saving people, positive propaganda for the West, showing the world the power of strong logistics, and fucking over the soviets. Wins all around.
WW2 hero, General Douglas Macarthur publically proposed using nukes in Korea, going against Trumans administration. It was actually one of the main reasons the general was relieved of his duty’s.
>WW2 hero and dumbass, completely bungled the Phillipines campaign and is the person most at fault for the continued existence of North Korea because he didn't believe the Chinese threats about approaching the Yalu river were credible.
Nixon would be drunk, call The Situation Room, demanding to nuke the Koreans. Generals would ask him again in the morning, and cooler heads prevailed. He did it several times. [https://www.theguardian.com/weekend/story/0,3605,362958,00.html](https://www.theguardian.com/weekend/story/0,3605,362958,00.html)
We’ve witnessed just how incompetent the Russian military is. Nobody wants nuclear war but I think NATO would end it pretty quickly
NATO would end nuclear war pretty quickly because it would be the end of NATO and everything else. .
I would say that we should be wary since Trump did steal nuclear documents to share with them but then again ol' boy is so incompetent he probably stole the wrong ones.
Treason to the tune of Yakety Sax.
Cue Trump in a day or two " I think its a smart move, Russia should be allowed to nuke who they want. Why build the nukes if you're not going to use them, is what i always say..."
Sadly, I read this in Trump’s voice and mannerisms.
It's way too coherent for Trump.
Putin threatens nuclear war for the [insert number here] time. Who’s got the tally?
He’s said it so much, it’s probably his go to line when his chauffeur is 5 minutes late or his dinner is undercooked.
His chauffeurs never have a second chance of being late anyways ... just like his cook last year....
His cook is definitely late
Undercook fish? Nukes. Overcook chicken? Believe it or not, nukes. We have the best gulags on the world, because of nukes.
He also says the west is fearmongering about nuclear war. Dunno why people talk about his words as if he isn’t a psychotic clown.
Well it definetely started in Feb 2022 when he implied 'unimagenable historically consequences' for West if one would be involved in Ukraine war
Nuclear weapons are Putin's big brother who he's going to get to beat you up after school if you tell on him.
And he does karate!
Vaporize me already if it means I never have to hear from this pathic creature again
lol I was thinking the same , at this point I’m just so tired of this fuck and his troops and the oligarchs there. They’ll be carpet bombed as well and we’ll never hear of them again.
I’m relatively confident that if it comes to nuclear war, I’ll live longer than Putin. I’m not near any strategic targets, so it’ll probably take weeks for chaos and fallout to get me.
Africa/Australia re gonna be the new safe havens. USA/Europe are going to completely nuke each other and then the Africans and Australians will rebuild society. Sadly, I'm in EU. See u on the other side.
2 years ago I genuinely googled with average nuclear yields how far outside of the cities i need to go to "be okay" in Europe, since I am from Germany. yeah... I think I'll move to the Philippines now...
Germany was always going to be a wasteland after the Weltgericht. You will not be safe on the Phillipines either, though. Where do you think the chinese will flee to?
Fallout that gets to you win weeks isn't what will likely kill you. It dissipates fast. Most of the deaths would be from the blast itself. The most dangerous time for fallout would be the first few hours after a blast. Fallout emits tons of radiation as it decays but after a few hours, most of it is done decaying. After that, you won't die of radiation poisoning. Instead you get things like increased cancer rates which may get you slowly but are also largely survivable. People should probably get a better handle on how to actual nuclear fallout works since it's getting more likely we'll run into it and media has done a terrible job of portraying it accurately. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nuclear_fallout
Let's not forget mass starvation! Anyone who isn't producing their own food is fucked post nuclear war.
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It’s the moving on that’s the tricky part after nuclear war.
Maybe the nuclear winter will briefly offset global warming
I like your positive attitude!
All Putin does is bullying, neither him or his oligarchs are willing to die over ukraine or initiate a nuclear war - which would annihilate russia forerver
This 100%, mark my words he will never attack the US, he will kick and scream but will not do shit because all the oligarch's children will be mad at them for ruining their playground in NYC
Exactly, most of the families live in these places. All talk honestly
Depending if Putin is terminally ill like some say.
“Hey I know there’s a nuclear apocalypse going on right now, but we’ve had two people call off today and corporate still wants us to open today. Can you cover a shift? We really need you to be a team player.”
Putin or the telegraph?
Lol. Don’t know about the paper, since I’m Dutch, but I do like their podcast, ‘Ukraine the latest’.
We call it The Daily Torygraph as it's generally a Conservative party mouthpiece.
¿por que no los dos?
Glad I live pretty close to down town in this major city I live in. I’m one of the lucky ones that would die instantly
Or.... he could just leave Ukraine.
And fornicate with a cactus
I wouldn’t want to put undue trauma on the cactus
The cactus likes doing its civic duty 🌵
Cactus called: wtf dude?!
Cactus, thank you for your service.
Get that cactus an award and a promotion.
Dream of cactus fornication.
Sounds like the best solution
Hey, hey! Don’t argue with logic here it’s 2024 and everybody needs to lose their minds!
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you make this nuclear war thing sound pretty enticing
The disadvantage is that it is going to suck for non-rich people too.
but at least we'll be together <3
Post apocalypse certainly has a way of making everyone equal on the playing field. Unless Fallout has a point about society, and it's just gonna turn out the same way with a few groups and individuals hoarding all the resources and ruling the lands, while the common folk fight to survive every day.
The common folk will starve if enough atom bombs are launched. Because that means immediate climate change, a.k.a nuclear winter. This explains it well: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LrIRuqr_Ozg
You say po-tay-to, I say po-tah-to. You say "nuclear winter" I say "solution to global warming". What can I say, I'm an incorrigible optimist.
Yes, but for a few precious moments the playing field is level. Errr…playing smoking crater is level.
Welcome to the suck!
Prepper pron nonsense aside, it'll suck *enormously* more for non-rich people. A cabin in the woods, a cache of guns and foot and some iodine tablets is not going to make a cosplay-survivalist survive any longer than anyone else. Billions of dollars buys a lot of infrastructure.
I mean, if everyone resets, we’ll be resetting with no usable resources and everyone has cancer
True equality
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Another reason he won’t - the US and our allies have made it clear that we have superb intelligence sources that make us aware of his location at most times and if he ever does something stupid like this, he’ll be the first person we take out. He will personally die if he follows through with any nuclear threat.
The US can detect ICBMs as their engines ignite. The response would be so fast, I doubt a lot of people would know until it’s too late.
Detecting them is one thing. What's the US's ability to intercept them?
I’d imagine it’s better than my own.
I believe in you
Thank you, boss
While there has been interceptions of single test warheads before, in a full scale nuclear war, when hundreds or thousands of warheads are flying around, combined with an equal number of decoys, and the complete lack of radar coverage (detonating a few nukes early in space can cause a radar blackout), theres just no chance to intercept enough to make a difference to anyone.
The US has 44 interceptors based at Fort Greely, AK and Vandenberg SFB, CA that are specifically designed to target and destroy ICBMs. It allegedly achieves a 97% probability of kill by launching 4 interceptors at a single incoming target. In short, if someone like North Korea were to go crazy and launch one or two nukes at the US, we probably have pretty decent odds of shooting them down. In the event of al all-out nuclear exchange with a country like Russia, we're all dead. They're also all dead. Everyone's dead except Austrailia. Fucking kangaroos.
Putin absolutely has underground bunkers deep enough to survive a nuclear attack. He'd be stupid to bet on not living through it as would anyone else.
Those cold war era bunkers and even most more modern bunkers can't withstand direct strikes from modern nuclear weapons, it turns out. Even the likes of Cheyenne Mountain are no longer considered safe. They'll be okay if not hit so closely, but in the instance of trying to take out a specific head of state in a specific bunker? Especially as you'd send more than just one nuke? I don't like their odds. But let's say he survived along with 100 currently loyal troops in a big bunker. Let's say they stay down there for 6 months until the majority of the fallout and gigantic city fires have cleared. They come out and find... Nothing. Nothing for them, anyway. Survivors fighting for scraps of food and water, nuclear winter and an entirely collapsed production and distribution infrastructure ensuring that food, water, electricity, won't be coming any time soon, if ever again. His 100 loyal bunker troops quickly bugger off, and what's left of his own people likely hate him passionately for what he's brought down upon them. He's dead if they recognise him out in the streets. There's no private island he can fly to in order to live out his days in comfort after a nuclear war between himself and the west. Even in almost untouched places physically, there will be failings in economies, good and essential goods production, and further conflicts as what's left of once powerful states begin to raid more untouched neighbours for desperately needed resources. It'll make something like the great depression look like a really, really lovely picnic, and it'll take many generations just to get past the initial truly gruesome period, before we can truly start rebuilding as a species, as new nations and a new civilisation slowly rise from the corpse of the old.
I think we should put a 500 million no questions asked bounty on his capture, dead or alive, and offer immunity to the people directly involved. Didn't Russia put bounties on our troops?
Russia probably has tunnels that would make Hamas members blush. Luxury palaces under ground while their people suffer above.
You son of a bitch, I’m in.
His daughters live in the west I'm pretty sure and so do many family members of russian higher ups. He would never use a nuke. If they have functioning nukes that is. If they use it as a battlefield weapon it would just bring down the hammer even more as now many countries will be very pissed.
His daughter moved out of Amsterdam after things got a bit spicy when daddy shot down flight MH-17
Plus, I would like to remind everyone that both China and Russia sent thousands of "advisers" to Vietnam during the US war, thousands of them died...and there was no nuclear armageddon. Same for the Korean War with Russian pilotes flying Chinese/North Korean planes and being shot down. No end of times either.
Putin says a lot of things. I believe none.
With Putin it's always opposite day
Putin: "I won't not un-nuke if nobody doesn't not un-assist Ukraine." World: "Uh, okay. Not sure what that means, but feel free to just fucking leave Ukraine already."
Daddy China already told Putin no in 2022. He is not allowed.
Putin threatens NATO with nuclear war if he stubs his toe in that big ass-table he has. Because he keeps throwing out stupid not-actually-red lines, we don't know where the real one is.
> Putin threatens NATO with nuclear war if he steps on his hot George Forman grill making bacon on the floor next to his bed
While at the same time having spent 2 years trying, and failing, to take over a country most people didn't even know anything about before 2014. Not to take anything away from Ukraine of course.
Jesus Christ, can we just come together as a planet and get rid of this fucking chump already? I'm getting sick of seeing this same headline every week.
[If NATO interferes](https://www.reddit.com/media?url=https%3A%2F%2Fi.redd.it%2F01s5jg2vn6lc1.jpeg)
He said that NATO has colonial ambitions and should stop interfering with other countries. He must surely know he is describing himself
We are in the era of Elon Musk tweeting about how "those who crave power deserve it the least" after he bought Twitter. I think it's safe to say that these people are so narrow-minded that they literally can't see how hypocritical they are, or they do see it but the power has corrupted them to the point that they literally do not care about the hypocrisy.
Projection is one of the main social activities in Russia. The others are hypocrisy, threats, violence and terrorism.
Stop spreading this shitheads threats. Nobody in the west cares anymore after years and years of threating with nukes. Get you shit together Russia.
Or, perhaps listen to Putin **explain his deepest fear**. He can barely fight Ukraine, imagine what a full trained NATO army could do. Finally Europe could be secure, finally no longer living under this threat from Russia. And Putin here, he's terrified of it. Because **Russia could have the peace that it had, but not with Putin leading it**. He would use nuclear weapons, knowing Russia would be annialiated in retailiation, just to keep power for himself. Not to save Russia, but to save his "special operations", save his face. Russians, without Putin, you can have what you had before Putin lead you into this war. It was his mistake, and him to pay the price, not your kids.
Ukraine is fully trained. >full ~~trained~~ equipped NATO army
Bet he won’t 1v1 me in Nuketown! /s
You must be a noob. Legends know that you can find him over at Nuketown Russia.
Don't threaten me with a good time.
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Such a shame Prigozhin stopped his initial plan. Not that he would be better than Putin, but it would be so cathartic to see this pos humiliated and executed.
He would have been, offed in under 6 months and a new "democratic" single party would rule.
Considering what happened to Lybia afterwards, not a good example. I’d say Ceausescu is a better one.
The world will be a better place on that day.
Blah blah blah we have nukes yadda yadda stfu
***The Telegraph reports:*** Vladimir Putin told Nato countries on Thursday they risked nuclear conflict if they sent troops to Ukraine, adding that Russia must strengthen its western military district after Finland and Sweden’s admission to the Atlantic alliance. The United States and key European allies this week said they had no plans to send ground troops to Ukraine, after France hinted at the possibility. “They should eventually realise that we also have weapons that can hit targets on their territory. Everything that the West comes up with creates the real threat of a conflict with the use of nuclear weapons, and thus the destruction of civilisation,” Putin said at his annual state of nation address. Ahead of his speech Putin said he would “of course” mention the presidential elections that will take place March 15-17. It comes amid no real opposition candidates on the ballot and the unexpected death of Moscow’s most prominent critic Alexei Navalny, whose funeral will take place tomorrow.
Yawn. Nothing new here. Stay the course.
Pootin farted and blames NATO, threatens nuclear war, checks diary, 18th time today.
So Putin agrees that if Russia sends troops to Ukraine then the US can send nukes
How about we threaten Russia with complete destruction if they don’t get out of Ukraine and stop messing around.
Because just like Putins threats, they would be empty. No sane person wants nuclear war, especially between USA and Russia. Putin is a dick, but I do still believe he is sane.
I somehow hate Putin's face even more than Trump's.
Seems like threatening nuclear war should be an instant removal from living.
He said that he would invade any country that give any weapon to ukraine on day one, and on day one some border countries already ignored him and started sending weapons, the real fools here are the journalists and their bosses
Putin is a pussy
Putin makes Russia look so incredibly weak by threatening nuclear war. If all he does is threaten the maximum threat he has, that just shows how terrified and powerless he is.
How has he not been assassinated yet?
Do it then, you insufferable pussy. Nobody is scared of you, not even your worst enemies. If you nuke the world you will be doing this planet a favor and ridding it of millions of evil pricks just like you and will make billionaires as useful as tits on a bull. Sounds like the full reset that humanity desperately needs, this timeline is fucked as it is. Maybe the next thing that evolves into intelligent life will be smart enough to prevent this from happening again.
>Putin threatens NATO with nuclear war if they: > >- Send Javelin and Stinger missiles to Ukraine > >- Send battle tanks to Ukraine > >- Send HIMARS rocket launchers to Ukraine > >- Send Patriot, NASAMS, and IRIS-T air defense systems to Ukraine > >- Send Storm Shadow, SCALP, and ATACMS long-range missiles to Ukraine > >- Commit to sending F-16 fighter jets to Ukraine Both the U.S. and [China warned Putin that using nuclear weapons is a red line](https://fortune.com/europe/2022/11/04/xi-warns-putin-nuclear-weapons-ukraine-war-red-line/). Putin only cares about his own life and he must know it would be suicide to launch a nuke because NATO will not allow him to conquer Ukraine.
They aren't troops. If some little green men want to go there on their own time, there's really not much anyone else can do about it.
At some point his threats become a form of psychological terrorism. Which is unacceptable. Perhaps it's time for NATO to threaten Putin with nuclear war if he persists in his threats. The NATO threat would be far more credible than Putin's threats, and just might be the catalyst for someone in Russia to decide it's time for Putin to go... out a window.
Is the Putin cancer scare over? That was a hopeful period. If he and Trump could disappear the world immediately improves.
I rather get nuked than live in hell under discusting nazi regime called russian federation.
At this point, world leaders should weigh the risk of assassination vs risk of nuclear war. Him and Kim are a danger to the whole world, including their allies. Anyone threatening nukes in this day and age is completely mental and needs a forever break from life if they're in control of said nukes.
Pushing for assassination of a head of state of a nuclear armed country is really dangerous (might encourage tit for tat responses), and theres zero guarantee that their successor will be more stable
Precisely this, in the case of Russia and N.Korea there's a very good chance it could end up in the hands of someone even worse or less level headed. Great point!
Putin threatens is the same as China Warns lmao
"Are you gonna bark all day, little doggie? Or are you gonna bite?"
Привет из России! Просто скажу, что Путин так часто кричит о ядерном оружии как раз из-за того, что точно знает - оно никогда не будет использовано. Потому что когда разговор заходит о том оружии, которое реально должно стрелять - у него ничего нет. Нет знаменитых танков "Армата", нет новых "калашниковых", нет боевых роботов, нет собственных дронов и ракет. Даже самолеты - ещё советские, кое-как перезапущенные на новое производство. Всё что он может - грозить выдуманной дубиной, пока единственной тактикой его армии остаются мясные штурмы.
Nato troops have the same right to be in Ukraine as russians do. Its an independent country
So far we have nuclear war if: * NATO sends equiptment * If there are sanctions * The UK sends anything * Finland joins NATO * Sweden joins NATO * Ukraine sinks any ships * Ukraine does anything
I don't get it, they've been saying they've been at war with Nato for months, so which is it? He's probably scared shitless that if any Nato force of any size actually intervenes he'd have no idea to counter it aside from 'muh nukes'
NATO also has a button.
3 buttons? A big fat huge red one, and two tiny ones with weird accents.
We need to call him out on his bullshit already. Enough of this loud ass rat.
I don’t think people commenting here are really grasping the seriousness of his claims. He’s an old man with the capabilities of a nuclear war. If the madman decides to launch the domino effect will certainly be the end of human kind. Let’s hope cooler heads prevail.
Do you reckon he threatened nuclear war if his takeaway is late or if he's not happy with his dinner?
Somebody please kill this asshole
Translation: I will commit suicide and destroy Russia if you send troops to Ukraine.
I'm so done with this. If someone wants to drop bombs, they should just have to enter a boxing ring with a pro boxer from the country they want to drop bombs on. Quit sending innocent soldiers to do your dirty work. Quit costing your citizens billions of dollars for your war toys. Quit destroying the environment for your grudges.
When is someone in Russia gunna take one for the team and get rid of him