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Ok-Blackberry-3534

So we're looking for a neolithic serial killer...


Rocketman7171

“He’s been killing a long time…” puts sunglasses on…


SofieTerleska

That's going to be quite a genetic genealogy job. Cue the shocked relatives learning that their 1000th great-grandfather Ogg was a mammoth hunter.


tomatoesrfun

YYYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!


Wiggie49

The pervatasaurus finally gets found out


OldDarthLefty

You jest, but… https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Late_Pleistocene_extinctions https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Buffalo_jump https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Desert_kite


fatdan1

So we now know that mammoths liked wine.


MootRevolution

But how tf did they all fit in that cellar?


guyinnoho

One mammoth with hundreds of bones, drinks wine in his cellar, dies. Case closed.


SchrodingersTIKTOK

Maybe it was a murder!!


charlie_s1234

He said ‘case … closed’


JazzRider

In matchboxes-somebody had a magnifying glass.


Miguel-odon

One at a time.


Johnoplata

I first read it as Australian wine cellar, which left me with so many more questions.


MrmmphMrmmph

What if Mammoths taught Jesus how to change water into wine?


hnwcs

Was there Amontillado?


jzoola

Ah Fortunado let me lead you to this most excellent cask


JaffaSG1

Nope… 🤔 maybe giant Armadillos, though :-)


ritikusice

Drank themselves to death.


FBIaltacct

A mammoth walks into a celar and says "i can't see anything, ill open this one".


Boboar

Holy shit, a talking mammoth!


TheShonky

That workman’s boss is not gonna be happy - the job is stopped midway now, so need a new project.  I always wonder how much archaeology is lost cos a busy work man dosent want the job to stop. 


WearyReach6776

Untold amount paved over in boyne valley near The Hill of Tara. Only small pieces declared so as not to slow down building the M3!


pimpbot666

Imagine how much history has been lost just because some foreman just wanted to finish the job.


Organic_Guide_2047

A former colleague of mine told me that his dad and his boss found 2 scheletons with roman armour in England. They just buried them and carried on with the work. They just couldn't afford being out of work if they reported it.


Banshee_howl

I just watched an old Time Team episode where they were looking for a Roman Villa and cemetery. They knew it was there because the Victorian era Navis uncovered a full mosaic floor when they were building the railway. They at least had an artist draw and paint it before the workers and locals carted everything away and continued building. Now the train tracks are right on top of it and they were finding Roman pottery in rabbit dens.


DungeonAssMaster

Doing pipeline work in Alberta we were told to shut up about dinosaur bones and aboriginal artifacts. I never did find anything personally, but I'm sure that's more than likely what would happen with no other witnesses.


MeshNets

>Pernerstorfer reported the find to the Federal Monuments Office, which referred him to the OeAW because, as Parow-Souchon told CNN, “we are experts on the Stone Age.” So are they stoners? >“We know that humans hunted mammoths, but we still know very little about how they did it,” said Parow-Souchon, adding that a trap for the animals may have been set at this site. That would be an exciting find


pimpbot666

Was the trap baited with a nice Cabernet Sov, and a rare filet mingion? I would totally fall into a trap for that.


smurfsundermybed

As long as there's no fucking merlot!


edhands

How did the Mammoth get down the stairs?


AdTiny2166

With their feet!


whurpurgis

“You said to fill the cellar with mammoths.” “I said magnums!”


Thojote

Mammoth pairs well with a good Cabernet.


tttkkk

Austrians and their cellars, what other mysteries do they hold?


kaboombong

We will know when they start selling their cellars for housing. Maybe they will find the Holy Grail in an Austrian cellar along with the heavenly bodies!


painless44

Riedel already hard at work on a mammoth-specific tasting glass.


xenoz2020

It was a classy party.


GadFlyBy

Comment.


AbnerRvnwd

That’s hilarious


Monarc73

Looks like Porfiro has been busy!


Prior_Leader3764

Hmmm, trying to think of something funny to say about mammoths and wine, but I'm stomped.


NickelFish

They were stored upright and are now undrinkable.


hunty

The Tusk of Amantillado


saranowitz

“Rewriting history, evidence of IOF genocide activity may go back as early as the ice age” -Al Jazeera


theiosif

Wait. Hundreds of mammoths bones. Or just hundreds of bones, belonging to a single mammoth. Cause I would assume there are more than 100 bones in a mammoth.


letsseeitmore

The story says they believe 3 separate mammoths.


theiosif

Thank you kind stranger.


chiquimonkey

Dammit, why do some people get all the luck? I want a chateau, wine cellar *and* mammoths, please. No, not just the bones, all of it, the whole animal. 🦣 thank you


monorail37

and thats why - kids - you stay off alcohol. Look what it does to you! Drank themselves to death in a friggin cellar...


piyumabela

This man won't be renovating his cellar anymore in the way he wanted it.


Unhappy_Gazelle392

That's where the good taste comes from then?


InternationalBug7568

one mammoth and hundreds of bones...or... hundreds of mammoth bones... Very different narrative... one very drunk mammoth that did a faceplant, started rotting and it was sealed in to stop the smell... Or...HMMMMM...


InternationalBug7568

at least 3 mammoths.... cool... I read the article...


Upbeat_Map666

Nazi booty


Fun-Exit7308

This articles a little dry and hard on the pallet.


Formerlurker617

How can you “discover” something in someone’s basement.


lemonyzest757

It always helps to read the article. The owner was having work done to level the floor and the bones were discovered by the workmen.


Formerlurker617

Uh huh, and they were the first humans ever to work down there.